Latest / Darren “Whackhead” Simpson’s prank calls on Kfm Mornings / Whackhead Prank: Senseless survey – it's all in your head

Transcript

Whackhead Prank: Senseless survey – it's all in your head · Darren “Whackhead” Simpson’s prank calls on Kfm Mornings

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Here we go, we go.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: Here's another senseless survey from Darren Wackheads Simpson on KFM Mornings,
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: KFM Mornings.
• 0:10
  Speaker 3: Okay, no more, take its on the waterapp telephone. We've
• 0:15
  Speaker 3: got some cracking prizes here on the on the wheel
• 0:19
  Speaker 3: of Choi. Okay, from tickets to Ultra, which is happening
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: in April.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: We go through, go through, go through, go through.
• 0:25
  Speaker 3: The prize that I'm most excited about is you're gonna
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: win a meat hamper. Yes, from Good Hope Meat Hyper
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: This is a prize that gets me excited in.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: This economy if you can get in Indyama for free. Hey,
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: I love winning meat. Do we know how generous this
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: meat hamper is? What are we talking about? You're gonna
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: you're gonna You're gonna win.
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: A quarter lamb, sure, beef mints, chicken pieces, sausage, beef steaks,
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: cold meats, burger petties, and a lot more to the
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: only have two and a half thousand. I missed those
• 1:04
  Speaker 3: days when I used to playing golf days and all
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: the prizes were meat. Really yeah, like you'd go home
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: with a meat hamper.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: When they do the prize giving at the end of
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: the night.
• 1:16
  Speaker 3: Yes, and they would go. It wouldn't even come out
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: of a fridge. It was lying there since midday, so
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: it was already like par cooked that you'd go home
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: happy with your eight chops, four steaks kilo vorse.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: It was the best of days.
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: But like the top ten players would would all get meat,
• 1:37
  Speaker 3: you know, like different quantities. Like the guy that won,
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: you'd have to back his bucket up into the clubhouse
• 1:43
  Speaker 3: because he got a whole cow.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: And this was a consistent prize at golf days.
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: This was every Thursday. It was the meat golf day.
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: Those days are long gone, friends, Okay, so they.
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: Must throw the deep freezer as well. Some of us
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: don't have space add that to the prize.
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, so so we've got a meet hamper amongst
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: many other things.
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: Right, make sure you have space in the house. Oh,
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: actually give some family some met too. That's actually good.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: What that for your first day? Big Brye and bry
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: all them. You don't have space for all the meat.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: You must send me to my mom in law. Dad, Yeah,
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: we go, happy birthday.
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: He has a kilo voice again, economy, I'll take it
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: one hundred.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: And forty nine rand a kilo A good price.
• 2:42
  Speaker 3: By the way, David, I love you so much. Happy
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: seventh anniversary. He has twelve chops. Yeah, it doesn't quite
• 2:51
  Speaker 3: work that way. Hey, okay, how many questions Shildon will
• 2:56
  Speaker 3: ask this morning?
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: Eleven question?
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: Eleven wrong, nine good, well remain nine yeah I will
• 3:06
  Speaker 3: brand nine yeah.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: Y yay.
• 3:09
  Speaker 3: Got a trifecta of triumphia.
• 3:12
  Speaker 4: We went a bit of burrow Horse or you get
• 3:15
  Speaker 4: you get, I'll give you some v This is al yes, yes,
• 3:25
  Speaker 4: all good. So it's good for you too, thank you?
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: All right? So, yeah it is nine.
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: But this is this morning senseless survey call up a
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: random person.
• 3:37
  Speaker 4: Did you get to have you?
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: Good morning?
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: Sir?
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: I'maged three one nine six two.
• 3:42
  Speaker 3: I'm calling you from the senseless bureau and you were naughty,
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: naughty because you didn't answer all your questions. So I
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: think about thirty seconds of your time.
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: Okay, can answer. So why is the word abbreviation so long?
• 3:57
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 4:00
  Speaker 3: Is checking your bank balance the adult equivalent of looking
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: under your bed for monsters as a kid? I don't
• 4:09
  Speaker 3: Is giving someone your unlocked phone the ultimate sign of trust?
• 4:15
  Speaker 4: Yes?
• 4:16
  Speaker 3: So are you aware that, due to inflation, the five
• 4:19
  Speaker 3: second rule has moved to the non second.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: Rule that could be postle.
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: Do you know that there are roughly six thousan five
• 4:27
  Speaker 3: hundred languages in the world, but we all sound the
• 4:30
  Speaker 3: same when we laugh.
• 4:38
  Speaker 4: I think I'll ask you you might know?
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: Okay, good money, i'magine three one. I'm calling it from
• 4:47
  Speaker 3: the Census Bureau, ma'am. Are painkillers just mute notifications for
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: the body?
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: It can be, It depends. It's all in your head.
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: Sometimes are the easiest children to raise? Imaginary?
• 5:04
  Speaker 4: Yes, sir.
• 5:06
  Speaker 3: How many years does it have to be for it
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: to go from grave robbing to archaeology?
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: Not sure, sir, ma'am.
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: In twenty years, will people in retirement homes be playing
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: Fortnite instead of Bingo?
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: Yes? Yes, question mark? Yeah, and I think that's true.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: There's going to be fights over the PlayStation. Yeah, think
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: about that. No more bingo when Fortnite now.
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: Not even when we're in a home. When when our
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: kids are in a home at eighty I spect like
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: a good hour days just play Fortnite.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: How many skins you got? Skids are dancing there? I
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: got such a sloping Yeah, where's your pin? Well?
• 6:01
  Speaker 3: My mind's mine's mind. I'm cracking out of Europe? Are
• 6:05
  Speaker 3: you on North American mid are you the Middle East?
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: Ping? I have no idea what you are. This is
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: fortnight talk here. It's the speed that you send information
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: and get it back from the service. Because the only
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: fortnight stuff I see is like the dancing. That's the emotes. No,
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: you know what, Okay, millennial they hit the wall.
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: That's a lot more than that. Gosh, that's what it's
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: going to be. What will our thing be there?
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: I'll be I don't want to think about that right now.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: Let's live life. Let's continue now you've got for the future.
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: You would say that, I don't want to think of
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: myself as somebody in the home.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: Not today, we're watching Bolden the Beautiful.
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: Yeah, egally, can we make a pact here as KFA
• 7:11
  Speaker 3: Mornings as of thirteen April twenty twenty six, let's make
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: a pact. We'll all be in the same nursing home.
• 7:22
  Speaker 3: What a rip that would be. Let's all go to
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: the same shady pines. Can you imagine the second? Obviously
• 7:37
  Speaker 3: I'll get there first, Yeah, I'll get their first, last second,
• 7:41
  Speaker 3: second incoming will be fine? Your I mean keeping this
• 7:45
  Speaker 3: place warm for you?
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: A lad? Look out big. Your kids have got look
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: at your grandkids. Who's next, who's next? Incoming? Brand bread?
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: Where you've been? Boy?
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: And I'll remember Sean as well, remember those mixes.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: And then Who's off the Bridge? It's gonna be rams
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: and yeah and then and it's gonna be shirtless. Last
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: will be shut. I'll probably be dragged and screaming. I'll
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: be I'll be on double oxygen bother I'll still be going.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: Who's got a laugh for me?
• 8:32
  Speaker 3: I told you this wasn't going to shorten my last.
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: And d J Gummy listen to this one, yes one
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: from Calvin Hannah.
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: Why am emotional? Knock see you at Shady Puns.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: Cry