Latest / Our Community, Our Mission / Ep #287 – Opening the Mailbag: Facing a Hard Question About Love and Limits

Transcript

Ep #287 – Opening the Mailbag: Facing a Hard Question About Love and Limits · Our Community, Our Mission

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: Gracious Heavenly Father, we uh thank you, Lord, for this day and your blessings.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_01: God, we thank you for your word.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_01: Um, God, that we can rely on it, we can trust in it, and uh, Lord, just that you uh desire to speak to us through it.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_01: Lord, I pray that uh this conversation would glorify and honor you, and uh Lord, that listeners that would hear it would be encouraged, and uh God, that just that you uh would speak through us today, Lord.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_01: In your holy name we pray.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_01: Amen.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_02: Hello, everybody.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for joining us for our Community Our Mission, a podcast of the Topeka Rescue Mission here on Tuesday, October 7th, 2025.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_02: And this is episode number 287.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_02: I'm your host today, Barry Feeker with Lamanda Cunningham, uh Marion Crable, and Josh Turley joining us again.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_02: Josh, we're gonna have a hard, good question for you today.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm asking automatically his mic's just gonna go out quit working.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: That's right.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_02: That's pretty good.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_02: Practice that up.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so uh anyway, it's a rainy fall kind of day today, and uh we're getting a uh preview of what's to come.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: That's right.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_02: So um and some people may be listening to this when it's really hot and it's in July or whatever down the road.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_02: So these are like perpetual ever podcasts.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_03: But perpetual ever.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_03: Perpetual ever.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_02: It's on the internet.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_03: Ever perpetual, ever there, forever and ever.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_03: The always giving.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_03: Even when you even when you mess up?
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_02: No.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_03: I know.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_03: We take those down.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_02: We take those down.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_02: That's right.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_02: And that's happened a few times.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, we've had to start over.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_02: I know.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_02: Mary made me start over a couple of times.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and it was both times it was my fault because I couldn't quit laughing.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_02: We do have a little fun before the podcast goes.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_02: We have more fun during the podcast and no fun afterwards.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_02: So it's over.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_02: But anyway.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_03: Let's go back to work.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_02: The fun ends.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_02: That's right.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_02: So we want to get into at least one of the special things about today, and this is really important.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, on October 7th, it's recognized as International Day of Peaceful Communication.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_02: So if you weren't feeling peaceful about today, just go back in your house and stay there because we want peaceful communication today.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_02: Uh basically, uh October 7th each year, uh, the day aims to encourage individuals and governments to solve conflict without resorting to any kind of aggression.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_02: Did anybody know that today was the day that we were gonna do that?
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_02: No.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_02: We we needed to get prepared.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_03: I know, that's right.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I'm uh Yeah, that one kind of seems maybe impossible these days.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_03: It really does.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe we should tell people about it.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_02: Call your elected officials, call your whoever.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_02: Call call call yourself.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: I was gonna say look in the mirror.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: That's what probably I need to do.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_02: It starts with me.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_02: Uh-huh.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_02: So whoever created this had created it for a reason because we really do need to resolve our conflicts peacefully, and that doesn't happen so much these days.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_02: So just a good reminder, um, especially as we go through this podcast today.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_02: Be kind to each other.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_02: So uh be kind to us if you're listening.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_02: So uh anyway, we have uh a few updates here that we want to talk about, um, and they're related to the holidays.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_02: Miriam, there's uh the season's coming fast, isn't it?
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my goodness.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_03: Can you even imagine that Christmas is literally right around the corner?
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_02: And I I think about Christmas, and I think about snow, and I think about ice, and I think about warming centers.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_02: That's gonna be a conversation here one of these days.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_02: Lamanda's not happy.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_03: And we were supposed to be nice.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_03: Peaceful communication.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_03: What happened to being nice, being kind.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_02: There's a reason this is only audio podcast and not video, because of Lamanda's look that she just gave me.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_02: It was like Well, there's things we don't talk about.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_02: So anyway, warming centers are coming, but we want to talk about the good part of the fall and the and the winter coming.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_02: So holidays are coming.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_02: Mary, what's happening?
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_03: Well, it's wonderful because actually there's just so much that we have going on.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_03: But one of the things, Barry, that I don't know if people really realize, we are very, very willing to come out and talk with their different groups, right?
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_03: Whether, like, for instance, on Sunday night, I had the incredible pleasure of speaking with the uh Bethel Community uh church up north off of 62nd Street.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_03: Exactly.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_03: Exactly, that's exactly right.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and this group of women were just so wonderful and so caring and had such thought-provoking questions about what we do.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_03: But we had a chance also then to kind of talk about the holidays and what's coming up and how people can help.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_03: But I think what's amazing is that each and every time I know that I go on a speaking engagement, um, we find out what people don't know.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_03: And it's shocking sometimes for us, right?
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_03: Who we're in it every day.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but there is just so much that people don't know about what we do.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_03: And it makes their hearts heavy when they hear some of what we talk about, but it also gives them this opportunity to think about how they can engage in more effective ways with TRM.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_03: You know, it's not just about money.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_03: Um, one of the things that that uh someone thought was that we don't take clothes anymore in our donations.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my goodness, right?
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_03: We take clothes every single day that we're open.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_03: What?
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_03: I know.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_03: That's almost what I but that's not an unusual thing that we sometimes hear.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_03: And then they're like, oh, well, I can help so much in that way.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_03: I have so many things that I could donate.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_03: So speaking engagements is wonderful, and we would just welcome to come to talk to any group.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_03: The other thing I encourage them to do then was think about volunteering over the holidays, or maybe just coming and doing a tour here at TRM to see.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_03: You know, we can talk about a lot, but sometimes just seeing what we do uh makes a huge difference to people.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_02: So what's a vehicle for someone who's listening right now to say, hey, my group, my company, my church, whatever, I'd like to have somebody from the rescue mission come to a meeting.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_03: Sure.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_03: They can reach out to Jacqueline um uh either via email or just make a phone call to us at 785-354-1744 and ask for Jacqueline and she will get that all arranged.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, great.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_02: And to find out more information, which we always talk about on the podcast, you can go to the website at TRMonline.org.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_02: A whole bunch of stuff.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_02: Now, you went to Bethel Community Church.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_02: And um you helped them to learn a little bit more about TRM.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_02: Did they help you learn about their involvement with TRM over the years?
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_03: You know, yes, but there were actually two people there that have worked here.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_02: Uh-huh.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_03: Um, there was someone who was talking about something that we used to do with having churches adopt families that we've placed in housing.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_03: So, yes, absolutely.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_02: Did they mention the really biggest part though?
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_03: No, I don't think they did, because I don't know what you're talking about.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_02: The the first director of Topeka Rescue Mission went to Bethel Community Church and he was the pastor there.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, really?
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_03: Charlie Fox.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_02: Charlie Fox was his church until he was not able to preach anymore.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_02: And so they did not mention that.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_02: Yep, that's what's Charlie's home, and uh one of the first churches I spoke in was uh Charlie's Church, uh as he was a former director of Topeka Rescue Mission.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, how interesting.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_02: I think there's a real connection between Bethel Community.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_03: No wonder you knew exactly where they were.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_02: Well I did, yes, I did.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_02: And that was uh back when they didn't have that edition on.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_02: It was a little tiny country church.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_02: Now they've got this beautiful edition.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_03: Absolutely.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_02: So have an opportunity for people to learn and us to learn as well when we go and see some of the incredible involvements some of our churches have had over the years.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_02: And and uh some people within those congregations uh know about it, and some of them don't, because there's been a lot of history at Speaker Rescue Mission 70 plus years.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_02: Lamanda, um, there's some needs uh that we have.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_02: You love talking about needs, right?
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: So Yeah, there's just a few, right?
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_02: So the holidays, there's some special things that are gonna happen.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_02: And so what are some of those particular things that are gonna happen and what some of uh those opportunities for people to help fulfill the needs?
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: Sure.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: You know, we kind of have particularly jumping to Christmas, um, we have what I see it as like three different prongs of huge needs that we need fulfilled.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_00: Um we definitely um do big Christmas celebrations for our guests, which you know we're averaging 260 a night.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: My guess is we could probably be between 275, 280 by that time because colder weather.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_02: Because some people come and go, and some of those numbers are even 300 plus.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_02: Correct.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and we've been averaging um 55 to 60 kids a night.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_00: So my guess is we'll be around that as well.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_00: And so those Christmas parties um are just that.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, we have gingerbread decorating and we have Santa Claus and we have people playing piano in both buildings, and we have games happening.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: Um, guests also get um a very intentional gift um that they get to select from, and then there's some wish list um items as well.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: And so we have these Christmas parties for hundreds of people just for our guests.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: Um, in addition to that, we also help um our unsheltered friends.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and we primarily do that through the mobile access partnership.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: And so we've got a tentative date in December for that already.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_00: And um, we try to give one or two gifts for that as well, in addition to snacks and and things.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: Uh so we put on that party, and then we also, last but not least, um, help all of our good friends at United Way of Caw Valley with the Christmas Bureau, um, which is you know hundreds of households.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_00: And um, so when we say, particularly around Christmas time, that we have Christmas needs, those Christmas needs are needed now in October.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and the reason I share that is because it's not like we're just trying to do something for 10 people that we could quickly turn around.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, and sometimes over thousands, depending on what's in the households.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_00: And so looking at that, that's not something that we can just quickly throw together, nor do we want to do that.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: And so the past several years, we've also kind of moved towards this um JOT forum.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: So, Josh, thanks for helping us create that.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: We have volunteers that come in and particularly with our guests, um, sit down and the guests get to pick things that they would really like, and there's choice, and and we try to do that.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_00: So it is a beautiful yet big undertaking in order to do a joyful and fun yet intentional Christmas celebrations this big.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so that being said, uh we and I'm gonna um punt to Josh in just a second to talk about the different ways people can follow up and and look into this more um deeply on how to access.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_00: But essentially looking at our holiday needs, because we do have some um food that we try to give out through our distribution center that's more geared towards um holiday meals, both for Thanksgiving and for Christmas.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_00: Um definitely food-wise, things like um the boxes or the bags of mashed potatoes, different pies, green beans, cream of mushroom soup.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_00: Um, when we're looking at just items that we need, um, just to name a few crock pots, toasters, always needing clothing, particularly um jackets and pants.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_00: I think people sometimes don't think to buy those, um, particularly for adults.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes I think it's easier for us to pick up a couple of coats for kids.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's cute, sometimes cheaper, although with inflation, I don't think anything is cheaper anymore.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um, we always are needing sheets, um, just all of those kinds of things.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_00: Um just had a meeting this morning, you know, as the CEO, you just never know if you're meeting on stuff that is preparing for a boardroom, or you're talking about the need of underwear.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_00: But the need for underwear is very big around here.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_00: And so I know it's silly, but I want to take a minute to explain.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: We always need underwear, kids' underwear, men underwear, female underwear.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_00: But the thing is, I think sometimes it is different for us to go, oh, we get to buy this five-pack of bluey underwear for this little boy, we know it's gonna make a difference.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_00: Or we are buying Sky, the pink, you know, power, whatever it is, um Paw Patrol.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_00: Paw Patrol and doing that.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_00: But we have real needs of adults.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: And um, not to get just so deep so early in the podcast, but I mean, we've got men who are walking around with no underwear because they have significant health challenges and and they go through them.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_00: And um we have women who want to really um disguise their true size, and so they're wearing over um way larger clothes um so that people can't see their body type and can't do all of this.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: And many of them are going without underwear or want to wear three or four layers of underwear.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_00: And so just to shed a little bit of light, underwear is definitely a huge need.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and none of us, I think, like going and buying that.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_00: I know that it's expensive, um, but there are specific days of the year that we can get deals on underwear, but I just need people to know socks and underwear are something that TRM needs 365 days a year.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_00: But when we're looking at trying to bless um in the early thousands every year of numbers, it's definitely something that we need.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_00: And so you will see that on our needs list.
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_00: You'll see it on there all the time, but you're gonna see it even more during the holidays.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_00: And that's because I know some people don't agree with me, but I see that as a basic need.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and I understand very empathetically why a lot of adults have um have that need.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I just want us to very dignifiedly, if that's a word, um, be able to take care of someone with that.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_02: There's nothing that a person who doesn't have a home uh doesn't need that somebody that does have a home.
• 14:06
  SPEAKER_02: Correct.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_02: We're all people.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_02: And so anything that uh I need, someone else needs.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_02: And so um and and and don't always get it.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_02: So one of the things about the uh Christmas time and the distribution, which is many different avenues, and Josh's gonna talk about it a little bit more in a minute, is we're looking for new items during this time.
• 14:25
  SPEAKER_02: Used items and probably not underwear, but you know, can be done at other times of the year, but to really like for that special blessing to be something new at Christmas time.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_02: Um used coats and those kind of things any other time, used pants, uh shirts and whatnot throughout the year, yes, but uh during Christmas we're looking for those new items to bless people in a special way.
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_00: And we've tried to highlight that on our flyer that I think is gonna be um or maybe already on the website.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_00: But you'll see we have it bolded.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_00: New household items needed, new clothing needed, new bed sheets.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_00: And so um I'm glad that you bring that up because we definitely don't ask for new stuff all year round.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_00: Um we really um make little go a long ways because the the Lord's generosity through his people.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, but for Christmas time, we do try to do it differently, and um we hope that people understand um that there's a lot of people that are grateful for anything, um, but that we don't always believe that someone should just get this, and especially during a season as as Christmas.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: Josh, do you want to kind of explain um if people didn't just memorize what I said?
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_00: Well, they should have.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: That's right.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_00: That's right, that's right.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_02: We do not condone.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_02: Please don't do that.
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_03: Is there a disclaimer?
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: I was gonna say Miriam's like the HR side of hers about to die right now.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_01: Can I tell you a funny story kind of off nut real quick?
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_01: So uh we partner, we talked about this last week, we partner with Lamar uh for billboard advertising, which we super appreciate.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_01: Huge blow shout out to Lamar.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_01: Um but a couple years ago I put together a billboard for Night of Price and Um not thinking and being super QR code happy, I put a QR code on there so people could he emails me back and says, yeah, we can't have QR codes on there.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_01: That makes sense.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_01: A little bit of liability for putting that up in the sky.
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_01: So uh so yeah, don't uh just drive when you're driving this way.
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_01: Um but yeah, no, there's lots of ways.
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_01: Uh we definitely uh try very hard to get it out as much as we can.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_01: So it's on our website.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_01: Go check out trmonline.org/slash needs list.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_01: We'll have that all there.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_01: Um we also are pushing stuff out on social media kind of constantly from here on out, you know, just putting that need out in front of people.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_01: And then specifically at this time, um, if you're listening today, October 7th and 8th of 2025, um, Amazon Prime Days is going on.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_01: So we'll have a link to our um our Amazon wish list that you can go check out those things.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_01: Um it's a kind of a full needs list.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_01: It's got other items on there that we kind of need all year, but it's also got specifically designated Christmas items.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_01: So if you find those on there and they're on a deal, snag them, and it'll you can add them to your cart and it'll ship it directly to our distribution center.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_02: So kind of a cool way to find all that at TRM Online.org.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_01: That's on that needs list as well.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, if you if you don't see it on Facebook, uh you can always go to that that needs list and that Amazon wishlist link is on there as well.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I think you know one of the keys here is Tobika Rescue Mission tries to make it easy to help.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_02: And so many different avenues.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_02: And one size doesn't fit all in clothing nor giving.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_01: And so Or like Miriam mentioned, speaking engagements where we can go get in front of people and we'll give you a fly or two.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_01: So we do paper.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_02: So about every way you can think of, if you want to participate, you can have somebody come speak to your group.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_02: Um, you can have a group come and vo and and and tour, you can volunteer, and all that's uh in that package which we call the web right now, to be able to find out how to do that and plug in.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_02: Also, there's still phone numbers you can call Jacqueline, as Mary mentioned, yeah, to be able to get plugged in.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_02: So uh the other thing too that's always good to mention um is this is an important time of the year for financial contributions for the rescue mission, not only for the Christmas season, holiday season, which is not just Christmas, we have Thanksgiving coming and those things.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_02: But we also um need to get prepared for 2026.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_02: Um their needs have always been great, uh, but they are getting greater um in regards to people who have needs.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_02: And Topeka Rescue Mission, um, I think we can say this with uh with humility, is um very blessed to be able to have such a support team in the community helping, um, and uh is also right there um has been stated so many different ways, loving in the gap um to be able to be where people are that otherwise might be forgotten and uh giving them a hope in a future.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_02: And um that's uh what you get to be a part of.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_02: And Miriam is a one-time Christmas coordinator many years ago.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that bait and switch that you did.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_02: Bringing you along.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_02: Uh you know, it's it's a blow it blows you away to see the generosity of people coming.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, it's it's incredible.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, the fact that we're able to do what we can do really speaks to the generosity of all of the folks that support us, whether they're financial donors or volunteers or people that bring us things, bring us food, all of that.
• 19:16
  SPEAKER_03: You know, sometimes we look at it if we had to pay for the food that we are able to distribute through the distribution center or utilize in our shelter, it would be millions of dollars as opposed to under 200,000.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_03: And that's all because people are generous and um support us in so many different ways.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_02: I just think it, you know, when we we look at the uh challenges we have in society today and how people aren't getting along and different things.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_02: When we see how people come together to help their neighbors like they do at Topeka Rescue Mission, I mean it's it's encouraging.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_03: It t I think it touches people's hearts.
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_03: And and I think it's particularly evident uh during the holiday season, too, because here you are doing all these things for yourself and your families.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_03: And it reminds you a little bit, especially when the weather isn't like it is today, where it's wet or when it gets really, really cold.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_03: You know, you think about those folks that don't have a place to be, a safe place, a dry place, a warm place, or that they might be alone on Christmas.
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_03: You know, there's just all of those things that I think really touch people's hearts and help them to be incredibly generous.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_03: And we depend on that.
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_03: Absolutely we depend on their generosity both with finances as well as um tangible things.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_02: Not everybody could everybody can be um in the streets um in a homeless camp.
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_02: Not everybody can uh serve uh food through a food service line.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_02: Not everybody can um be up at two o'clock in the morning trying to help somebody navigate an anxiety disorder that they're having because they're in a homeless shelter and they don't know which ends up.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_02: Uh not everybody can uh stand in that gap, but you can support the people that do that.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_02: And that is what uh those financial contributions will help do in addition to all the supplies and the savings of dollars and food.
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_02: And we could we will have more conversation um on this podcast in regards to the scarcity of food is even more so than we uh know, and there's some different changes that are happening within the the government distribution of different programs and so forth, and we can have some robust conversation around that, but also demonstrate the need.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_02: So uh yep, TRM online dot or g but uh we're not done here.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_02: We got a special thing we want to talk about, Josh.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_02: Uh you um, in regards to the podcast, you um have a little special thing out there on Facebook, and it's called fan mail.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_02: And so talk about fan mail, and we we had a we got a bite.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_01: We got a bite.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_01: So, yeah, re uh not too long ago, um, I realized in our host, not to get too technical, but our our host site that hosts our podcast has a little feature that says ask for fan mail.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_01: And so if you look in the description of each podcast, there's a little button at the bottom that says have a question or you know, have some fan mail.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_01: And so um that's that's been there.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_01: So I want to plug that to our listeners.
• 22:10
  SPEAKER_01: If you got a question, submit that and we'll we'll maybe get to it.
• 22:13
  SPEAKER_01: So, but we got one of those.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_01: And so the first one.
• 22:16
  SPEAKER_01: The first one, yeah.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_01: So I want to read that to you guys and uh get your thoughts on it.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so our uh listener, which thank you to this listener for sending this in, says, Can you explain patients with an addict and walking alongside them?
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_01: Like when should you give up on them?
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_01: How many times can an addict fall off the wagon?
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_01: What if an addict uses once after a couple years?
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_01: Should their consequences be severe, or should it be like when a food addict addict that's on a diet stops at McDonald's secretly and you find out, struggling to help someone I know, I don't care if they fall off of a wagon, tomorrow is a new day.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_01: Great question.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, really appreciate who sent that in, and that is a question that uh is going to have a lot of different angles and different views on it.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_02: So um Topeka Rescue Mission, Lamanda um is an organization where people come in in all kinds of different situations and challenges in life.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_02: And and um sometimes there's uh uh been one experience in their life that has created an avenue for them to become homeless, and then sometimes it's a repetitive type situation.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_02: So there's a lot of meat in here in that regards.
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_02: I wish they wouldn't have put it uh that McDonald's thing in there because that hurt a lot.
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_00: We won't talk about your frappase, Barry.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_00: We won't talk about it.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_02: They're a whole lot cheaper there.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_02: But anyway, thanks for turning me on to Frappa's a number of years ago.
• 23:40
  SPEAKER_02: Um yeah, thanks so much.
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_02: But anyway, Lamanda, uh in general, as uh CEO of Topeka Rescue Mission, um uh this is not an easy answer, is it?
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_02: No.
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_02: So how do you answer this?
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um I'm gonna pass to Josh.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_00: Man, you know, I think opening remarks, what I would say on that is one, I appreciate whoever sent this in.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_00: Um I appreciate the vulnerability of this person to show what they're wrestling with and then to kind of allow us the opportunity to be able to say, and I I hate the word normal, but there is a sense of normalcy with these concepts of what's right, what's wrong, how many times, what's too much, boundaries, all of those things.
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_00: And so definitely appreciate who sent this in.
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_00: Um, you know, to be vulnerable back.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_00: Um when I'm looking at from the lens of CEO, the Topeka Rescue Mission has got to be a place where we constantly communicate that no one is ever too far gone from the Lord's love or his redemption.
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_00: And so um I wish that I could say that that belief always came in a shiny package, right?
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_00: Where it was just easy and we say, the Lord loves you and that covers everything.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_00: Um the message does, but then there is also some practicalities um that I wrestle with in regards to the logistics of whether it's running the shelters or maybe some of the services we give on street reach.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_00: And so what I want to be clear is that when this says, you know, um basically, when should we give up on them?
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_00: Um my answer to that from a faith piece is never that we as Christians can never give up on someone's ability to be redeemed by the Father.
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_00: We know that He loves people and that He didn't put parameters on that love we're supposed to share.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_00: So the easy part to this question is in my opinion, we never give up on someone's ability to turn to Christ.
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_00: We never give up on that they can be forgiven by the Father, and we never give up on a person's ability to be transformed by Christ.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna trust the Lord with this one.
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_00: The other side of it, and this is a part that I wrestle with, and I'm sure I'll cry.
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_00: So look, I didn't even wear mascara today.
• 26:36
  SPEAKER_00: I'm prepared.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_00: The other side of it is, and this is what I wrestle with, Barry.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_00: Um whether it's staff members, whether it's an unsheltered neighbor, whether it's a guest that we have to put out because of safety concerns, what is not written and read in the Bible is that everybody is given all of those chances at TRM.
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_00: And um I'm not sure I'll ever have the right answer because I think um anytime we do have to put somebody on a 30-day out or we do have to restrict some type of service, I'm gonna be honest with you, it eats me alive.
• 27:20
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and I hope that um that vulnerability shows through on this podcast.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_00: But at the same time, when I look at everyone else that is um around people, there is also whether it's the safety component or this exposure component.
• 27:38
  SPEAKER_00: There's other lenses that I have to evaluate as the CEO for other people in order to shepherd them well.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and so what I hope TRM, myself as CEO, our team, our volunteers, I hope what we do well is we always talk about the access to Christ and the forgiveness of Christ and the love of Christ.
• 28:01
  SPEAKER_00: I then have to balance that though, with there are certain behaviors where I have to say TRM cannot provide the service right now, but that doesn't change your access to Christ.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_00: That doesn't change your transformation.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_00: But yet I also have to put appropriate boundaries and protections in place for other people, children, other adults, volunteers, staff in place.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_00: And um yeah, I'm not sure that will ever get easier.
• 28:31
  SPEAKER_00: I don't I don't know.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_00: You could probably speak better to that.
• 28:35
  SPEAKER_00: I'm only four years in.
• 28:36
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but I I question every time when we put a restriction on somebody.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_00: And um many of them when I get the incident reports that come through and all of that because of a relapse or a safety issue or um repetitive behaviors.
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_00: Um I literally pray to the Lord like I was hoping that their healing would come through the services at TRM, but Father help me understand that you might have something else um as a part of their journey that I can't see.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_00: And that's a very tender, um, hard thing for me to walk through from the professional side.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_02: It's probably one of the hardest things that uh TRM has to face.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_02: Um and I think many people, um, when they have someone that they care about in their life, and uh this person is making bad decisions and it's hurting them andor other people with those bad decisions, where is that balance?
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_02: And and in Christianity, there's a big emphasis on forgiveness and there is no limit to forgiveness.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_02: Um God fortunately hasn't put a cap on forgiveness.
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_02: Thank goodness.
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, thank goodness, that's right.
• 29:50
  SPEAKER_02: And uh but to your point, there is not necessarily a direction to forgetness.
• 29:57
  SPEAKER_02: We just don't forget about it.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_02: Um and then that's where.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_02: Decisions have to be made in regards to what you said boundaries in that regard.
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_02: And so I think that we we we run into challenges about okay, when do we exercise or how do we exercise forgiveness?
• 30:13
  SPEAKER_02: Um how do we not hold a grudge against that person?
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_02: Um how do we uh um um also protect and all uh others around who from that person who may be making bad decisions as well as themselves.
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_03: Well, you know, and I think it's it's dangerous if we think that patience means acceptance, right?
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_03: Because, you know, we have patience with the fact that we know people are not that they're fallible, right?
• 30:41
  SPEAKER_03: We have patience with that.
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_03: It doesn't mean we accept anything.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_03: You know, Lamanda, what I hear you talking about is we don't accept the behaviors that put themselves or others at risk, right?
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_03: So I think we should probably be patient forever, you know, with people as they walk this journey.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_03: You know, we could think of an employee in our shelter right now, right?
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_03: That it took 40 years, you know, and if we had as and whether it is as an organization or us as individuals, maybe with family members or friends or whatever, we can be patient forever.
• 31:22
  SPEAKER_03: But our actions may look different at any given time um because of wanting to make sure we're really helping.
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that's the key, making sure we're really helping.
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_02: Because sometimes we can be challenged with how it feels to us.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_02: And um if if Christ uh made decisions on how he felt about the people who were sinning against him and hurting him, might have a different way of forgiving.
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_02: But he doesn't.
• 31:53
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 31:53
  SPEAKER_02: It's a forgiveness.
• 31:54
  SPEAKER_02: If you turn, repent, come, you are forgiven.
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_02: That forgiveness for you.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_02: And he tells us to do the same with others.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_02: And so we have to look at the situations of somebody violating a rule here at the Pika Rescue Mission, or one of the hardest conversations I've had over the years, Lamanda and Miriam, you may have had these as well, is with some parents who have a child who's an adult who is really struggling and they're in the home.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_02: And uh that uh child, they love them.
• 32:24
  SPEAKER_02: Their forgiveness is unending, but also there's destructive behavior happening.
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_02: What do you do to set that boundary and to to try to counsel that parent on maybe it's time to say to that child, you need to go ahead and leave.
• 32:39
  SPEAKER_02: That's a boundary.
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_02: What does that hurt?
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_02: Um that's out there and in here inside the Ministry of Topeka Rescue Mission.
• 32:47
  SPEAKER_01: Uh I was gonna add to that a little bit.
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_01: Um, growing up, I can think I've talked about it a little bit before.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_01: My dad uh worked for an organization called Teen Challenge, um life controlling addiction recovery program, year-long faith-based program.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_01: And I remember growing up as a kid, um, my dad kind of sharing about the work that he was doing because he had, you know, 20, 30, 40-year-old men, and how many times he would have to have those conversations because, you know, these parents would come in and, you know, either bail their kids out or or something.
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_01: And those conversations of like you you kind of have to let them there's a difference in kind of like we've talked about when helping hurts.
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_01: Um and when it's not that you don't love them, but sometimes that that love can be difficult and that you have to let them go through those struggles.
• 33:34
  SPEAKER_02: And that's not an easy thing.
• 33:35
  SPEAKER_02: That is one of those kind of situations where you just um need to maybe seek some help um outside of yourself, but also seek God.
• 33:45
  SPEAKER_02: God, what should I do in this particular situation?
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_02: So let's unpack this just a little bit more, what uh the person wrote in.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_02: And so um obviously they're talking about you know the patience part, you know, walking alongside this attic.
• 33:58
  SPEAKER_02: But they said, like, when should you give up?
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_02: When should you give up on them?
• 34:03
  SPEAKER_02: That's a that's a really important question.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_02: And what does giving up mean?
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_02: So is there a time that we should ever give up?
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_02: And if we do, what does that mean?
• 34:15
  SPEAKER_02: If we don't, what does that mean?
• 34:17
  SPEAKER_02: How do you not give up on somebody who just continually goes back over the same territory?
• 34:23
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I believe it or not, I actually think I have an easy answer for this one.
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_00: Might be the only thing we're gonna do.
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_00: We'll let you know.
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_00: That's right.
• 34:30
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but one of the things that the Lord has really given me peace on, um, and man, I hope I say it according to what he wants, but it is up to us as believers to always be able to see what someone could be.
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_00: So it is up to us to never deny that God can transform them.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_00: Um, for us to never give up on um the fact that, you know, kind of the prodigal son, right?
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_00: That people can always run back to the father and that he's waiting and he's pursuing.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_00: Um, what the Lord has given me peace on is that it is my responsibility as a believer to always see what a person can become.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_00: It is not my responsibility to ensure that they do.
• 35:21
  SPEAKER_03: Correct.
• 35:23
  SPEAKER_00: Now, what I can't tell you is that I have peace in that.
• 35:29
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because I don't understand God's timing.
• 35:33
  SPEAKER_00: I don't understand sometimes.
• 35:35
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just like, Lord, can't we just heal them right now?
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so that I don't have to give up on them, or I don't have to get frustrated, or I don't have to get away from the money.
• 35:42
  SPEAKER_02: Or I can go on to the next person that's got a channel and just get this one fixed.
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_00: Correct.
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so there is that component, right?
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_00: But I really think that again, we should never give up on the transformation that is awaiting people in Christ.
• 35:57
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but what we do have to kind of give ourselves grace for and not have a false sense of pride is that that transformation truly does not come from us.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_00: We have tools at the Topeka Rescue Mission, whether that's food, shelter, um, kindness, um, volunteerism, all of those things to help people access to reacclimate to things.
• 36:24
  SPEAKER_00: But true change and true transformation is so out of my reach.
• 36:30
  SPEAKER_00: I can't do it for someone.
• 36:32
  SPEAKER_00: And I think the father wants us to rest in that and have peace in that, whether it's a caregiver, whether it's this person that that came in um and gave us this question, you know, when should we give up on them?
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_00: And then the other question of how many times can an addict fall off the wagon?
• 36:50
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I think you can replace addict with anything.
• 36:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I think we're all on our own journey.
• 36:56
  SPEAKER_00: And so, do I think that there are sins in my life that the Lord was very clear on?
• 37:03
  SPEAKER_00: You better change this.
• 37:04
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 37:06
  SPEAKER_00: And then are there other things where I've probably been wrestling with something for 20 years and he's like, oh daughter, you are a wanderer like the Israelites, right?
• 37:16
  SPEAKER_00: And so I'm not sure there is any magic number that's a cutoff for us on how many times someone can do something or how many times it's after that and we cut them off.
• 37:29
  SPEAKER_00: I just don't think as believers we can operate like that.
• 37:32
  SPEAKER_00: What we do need to be looking at, though, is um how are we guiding them to Christ?
• 37:39
  SPEAKER_00: And if there is repeated behaviors, whether it's addiction, another sin or whatever, um, are there appropriate times for us to still share the gospel and still shed truth to what that person can access, but yet put a boundary in place where we're connecting them to other resources or other things.
• 38:00
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's appropriate, whether you're a caregiver, that parent that you just mentioned, you know, that has an adult child struggling, or the Topeka Rescue Mission.
• 38:09
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes there are parameters where the gospel doesn't stop, but we do have to pivot um other types of services that we're giving.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't think we can assume we know what healing looks like either.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_03: And the journeys are different.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_03: The journeys are different.
• 38:26
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't think because, you know, as we talk about the gospel and um people knowing Christ, really knowing Christ, like we can make an assumption, well, if you know Christ, you won't do those things.
• 38:39
  SPEAKER_03: But we know that's not true.
• 38:41
  SPEAKER_03: And so how do we reassure them in that that they are not lost to us, nor are they lost to him?
• 38:48
  SPEAKER_03: Right?
• 38:48
  SPEAKER_03: So healing, we may think this is what healing looks like, and that's not exactly it.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_02: There was a very successful businessman in Omaha, Nebraska by the name of Jerry Dunn, and uh he um had a alcohol challenge in his life, and he ended up losing everything and ended up in prison.
• 39:09
  SPEAKER_02: And um he was there for a amount of time, and there was uh a tract, as they call it a tract in prison about Jesus Christ, and he gave his life to Christ in prison.
• 39:19
  SPEAKER_02: Came out of that situation a changed man, and started uh what we call the open door rescue mission today, and also of the uh People City in Lincoln, Nebraska, became a very well-known international guru in rescue mission work.
• 39:35
  SPEAKER_02: Uh when he came to Topeka to visit me, it was almost like the Pope of rescue missions is coming, Jerry Dunn.
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_02: And uh, you know, it was like, oh my gosh, I get a chance to actually have a lunch with Jerry Dunn because I'd heard so much about him.
• 39:47
  SPEAKER_02: And so I'm having lunch with him, and we're just having a meal there.
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_02: And I said, Reverend Dunn, I said, I got a really big question for you.
• 39:54
  SPEAKER_02: And uh he said, Yeah, what's that?
• 39:56
  SPEAKER_02: And um I said, When did you know you were delivered from alcohol?
• 40:01
  SPEAKER_02: You know what his answer was?
• 40:02
  SPEAKER_02: Haven't been.
• 40:03
  SPEAKER_07: Never been.
• 40:04
  SPEAKER_02: Haven't been.
• 40:05
  SPEAKER_02: Now he is the guy who wrote several books.
• 40:08
  SPEAKER_02: One's called Gods Is for the Alcoholic.
• 40:10
  SPEAKER_02: He started kind of a Christian AA program uh that went uh all over the United States, maybe all over the world.
• 40:16
  SPEAKER_02: And he shocked me when he says haven't been.
• 40:19
  SPEAKER_02: And I said, haven't been.
• 40:21
  SPEAKER_02: He said, Yeah, tempted every day.
• 40:23
  SPEAKER_02: And this is like 40 years after all those experiences and uh in and coming out of prison.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_02: And uh I said, so how do you deal with it?
• 40:31
  SPEAKER_02: I take it to the cross every day.
• 40:33
  SPEAKER_02: He said, I nail it to the cross every day.
• 40:36
  SPEAKER_02: And um he actually retired and and uh passed away here in Topeka, Kansas.
• 40:40
  SPEAKER_02: A lot of people don't know that at uh at um Rhastone.
• 40:44
  SPEAKER_02: Um and just uh you know a wonderful guy, but what a what a realistic testimony.
• 40:48
  SPEAKER_02: Some people, how many times can a person fall off the wagon?
• 40:52
  SPEAKER_02: Unlimited until they die.
• 40:54
  SPEAKER_02: It can happen.
• 40:55
  SPEAKER_02: It could be that last time when somebody uh or maybe never, and that's where we go back to we're not in control of this.
• 41:02
  SPEAKER_02: We God is in control.
• 41:04
  SPEAKER_02: Um we ask the question, like as you said, Lamano, God, why don't you heal this person right now?
• 41:09
  SPEAKER_02: Really, I need for you to heal this person.
• 41:11
  SPEAKER_02: I need you to heal me.
• 41:12
  SPEAKER_02: Uh need for you to do this.
• 41:13
  SPEAKER_02: Like Jerry Dunn probably said, God, when are you gonna take this from me?
• 41:16
  SPEAKER_02: When are you gonna take this from me?
• 41:18
  SPEAKER_02: Paul in the Bible had this um thorn in his side, whatever that was, this affliction.
• 41:23
  SPEAKER_02: We don't know what it was, but he prayed to the Lord, take it three times.
• 41:26
  SPEAKER_02: The Lord said, nah, we're good.
• 41:28
  SPEAKER_02: My grace is gonna be good enough for you.
• 41:30
  SPEAKER_02: And you think about Paul.
• 41:32
  SPEAKER_02: Who was Paul?
• 41:34
  SPEAKER_01: Chief among sinners.
• 41:36
  unknown: Yeah.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_01: He was killing Christians.
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_01: Uh-huh.
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_01: That's right.
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_01: Nobody wanted to witness to that guy.
• 41:40
  SPEAKER_01: That's took Jesus.
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_07: Right.
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_01: And so I think like we never know, you know, how lives will be changed.
• 41:47
  SPEAKER_01: You know, we just have to pray that we the opportunities that are in front of us, we take advantage of them.
• 41:52
  SPEAKER_01: But that's not us.
• 41:53
  SPEAKER_01: That's the Lord presenting them to us to be a vessel, but it's not us.
• 41:57
  SPEAKER_02: That is not easy to do when we care about people.
• 42:00
  SPEAKER_02: You're in a helping uh ministry, you're in a helping social service profession, you have a family member, you have a spouse, you have a friend, and you see them going down the wrong path.
• 42:10
  SPEAKER_02: It's not easy for us to trust God and let that go.
• 42:12
  SPEAKER_02: And then oftentimes what we do is we get extreme.
• 42:15
  SPEAKER_02: We get extreme of too much care.
• 42:17
  SPEAKER_07: Right.
• 42:18
  SPEAKER_02: And we then hurt when helping hurts.
• 42:22
  SPEAKER_02: Or we reject that person when God may have put them in our lives, the struggle, struggle buses we may be on with that person to be there for the long haul and never give up.
• 42:33
  SPEAKER_01: I think about that with like my kids too, like even my boys.
• 42:36
  SPEAKER_01: Like I can't force my boys to love Jesus.
• 42:39
  SPEAKER_01: If I try to force them to, it's gonna drive them away.
• 42:41
  SPEAKER_01: Uh-huh.
• 42:42
  SPEAKER_01: All I can do is show them Jesus and show them how wonderful he is and show them how he's there for them at all times.
• 42:47
  SPEAKER_01: That's the only way I can convince them of Jesus.
• 42:50
  SPEAKER_01: I can't force that.
• 42:51
  SPEAKER_01: And so why I can't do that for anybody else.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_01: I just gotta show them Jesus.
• 42:56
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, at the rescue mission too, I love that example of parenting.
• 43:00
  SPEAKER_00: And then the other example is what we do every day.
• 43:04
  SPEAKER_00: You will not hear from myself, a board member, or a staff member.
• 43:12
  SPEAKER_00: Blank is okay because God loves you.
• 43:15
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever, whether it's criminal activity, drug use, sin, hurting someone, whatever.
• 43:24
  SPEAKER_00: We definitely at the rescue mission do not condone criminal behavior or addiction or alcoholism.
• 43:34
  SPEAKER_00: What I do hope that we are trying to get the message out is despite that, God can do.
• 43:43
  SPEAKER_00: And that is not always popular in our community.
• 43:47
  SPEAKER_00: And then people put, and I'm just gonna put myself in this boat, not not others.
• 43:52
  SPEAKER_00: Then people put words in my mouth as the CEO.
• 43:55
  SPEAKER_00: And then the next thing I know, it spreads like wildfire in regards to well, Lamanda is part of the reason why we have this happening on the river, or Lamanda in the Topeka rescue mission is why this person broke into this business.
• 44:13
  SPEAKER_00: Or don't talk to Lamanda about this because she's just gonna preach compassion.
• 44:18
  SPEAKER_00: Well, here's the deal.
• 44:20
  SPEAKER_00: I have a law enforcement background.
• 44:22
  SPEAKER_00: I too am a mom and a wife, and I care about the community we live in.
• 44:26
  SPEAKER_00: Principal in the school.
• 44:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 44:27
  SPEAKER_00: There's a lot of just community service that I've designated my life to.
• 44:32
  SPEAKER_00: And so I'm not at all condoning or excusing or even being soft on sinful behaviors that harm someone individually or others.
• 44:45
  SPEAKER_00: That's not okay.
• 44:46
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but I also can't be what some would deem a popular opinion if that popular opinion is let's blast them, let's let's speak ugly about them, um, let's tell them that they are um, I can't even say some of the bad words that are shared, and then say they deserve XYZ.
• 45:10
  SPEAKER_00: That as a Christian cannot come out of my mouth as the CEO of this organization.
• 45:15
  SPEAKER_00: What I can say is empathetically, when they're harming themselves or they've harmed others or whatever, I can care about all involved compassionately.
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_00: I can say what things shouldn't be done, and I understand that.
• 45:30
  SPEAKER_00: But I also have a responsibility to believe in Amago Day and that people are made in his image, and that I will never know until I get into heaven who's there and who isn't.
• 45:45
  SPEAKER_00: And on this earth, I cannot be with other groups that make fun of people that want to um hate the person and not hate the behavior, or all of this talk about this person and they are this because they did this and they took this from me while I don't agree with those behaviors.
• 46:07
  SPEAKER_00: I cannot look at somebody and say they're never gonna change.
• 46:12
  SPEAKER_00: I cannot look at somebody and say they're too far gone.
• 46:16
  SPEAKER_00: Because I look at myself.
• 46:18
  SPEAKER_00: And if I'm a work in progress and I am a daughter of the king and he's changing me, why would I think that that same transformation and change and all of that is only for myself and not someone else?
• 46:31
  SPEAKER_00: And so I just wanted to take a minute to say whether it's somebody who was unsheltered's done something or or whatever the case may be, um, I look at crime the same, regardless if you have money or you're in our shelters.
• 46:47
  SPEAKER_00: I look at abuse, I look at all of those things that really hurt families and hurt business owners or hurt our community.
• 46:56
  SPEAKER_00: I look at that um hurting just like anybody else would.
• 47:01
  SPEAKER_00: Um but leading a faith ministry, I cannot say the gospel is for everybody, but it's not written there.
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_00: And so as long as I'm here, I will try with the best of my ability to care about the harm that people do to themselves or others, their family members, at the same try to care, give, and all of that, stand for what's not okay.
• 47:32
  SPEAKER_00: But the other side of it is I also have got to look at the perpetrator, whether that's an addiction and they're only harming themselves or something that's harmed someone else.
• 47:44
  SPEAKER_00: And I also have to see the what they could become through the transformation of Christ.
• 47:50
  SPEAKER_00: And it's up to that person in Christ whether that happens.
• 47:54
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I think one of the uh opportunities and assignments, so to speak, of rescue missions is to help people understand.
• 48:00
  SPEAKER_02: And uh this conversation we're having today is because a writer wrote in had question of trying to understand.
• 48:07
  SPEAKER_02: Now they kind of concluded it that there's another day tomorrow.
• 48:11
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that was a great conclusion.
• 48:13
  SPEAKER_02: But uh oftentimes what we don't understand we uh fear.
• 48:18
  SPEAKER_02: And those things that we fear, we fight.
• 48:21
  SPEAKER_02: And so Topeka Rescue Mission has an opportunity to uh help people to understand.
• 48:26
  SPEAKER_02: Uh we started out the podcast talking about uh um inviting somebody from Tuker Topeka Rescue Mission to come talk to their church or to their civic group to talk about these issues.
• 48:36
  SPEAKER_02: And by and large, somebody who's gonna be listening to that, or maybe everybody, it will apply to them in some way as we talk about how do we treat others.
• 48:45
  SPEAKER_06: Absolutely.
• 48:46
  SPEAKER_02: And and so it's a bigger than just helping the homeless and providing shelter and food.
• 48:50
  SPEAKER_02: It's really about an examination of who we are, who we are with ourselves, with God, and with others, um, and how we treat each other.
• 48:58
  SPEAKER_02: And um and that's very challenged because we don't understand.
• 49:02
  SPEAKER_02: And what we don't understand, we are afraid of, and what we're afraid of we fight.
• 49:05
  SPEAKER_02: And so it's easier to fight, to judge, to name, to to to to to put people.
• 49:10
  SPEAKER_02: One last question here, um, and that this is probably one of the the harder parts.
• 49:15
  SPEAKER_02: Should there be consequences and should they be severe to person's behavior?
• 49:20
  SPEAKER_02: What does that mean?
• 49:21
  SPEAKER_02: Should there be consequences and should those consequences be severe?
• 49:25
  SPEAKER_03: Well, consequences are inevitable, right?
• 49:29
  SPEAKER_03: Whether they're self-induced consequences, right?
• 49:32
  SPEAKER_03: You know, if you don't care for yourself, um with if we're talking about drug addiction or alcohol addiction, you're gonna have physical effects.
• 49:41
  SPEAKER_03: Those are consequences of your behavior.
• 49:43
  SPEAKER_03: Here at TRM, there are consequences if your behavior puts yourself or others at risk, right?
• 49:50
  SPEAKER_03: There are consequences.
• 49:51
  SPEAKER_03: I think severity can sometimes be a perspective, not necessarily a reality.
• 50:01
  SPEAKER_03: And you know, somebody who's staying in the shelter who has to leave because um of whatever reason, right?
• 50:10
  SPEAKER_03: The behavior is not good, whatever, they've broken significant rules, that may feel very severe to them, right?
• 50:18
  SPEAKER_03: It may not seem as severe as if we say, and you can never come back.
• 50:22
  SPEAKER_03: That to us would feel really severe, right?
• 50:25
  SPEAKER_03: So I think severity sometimes has levels according to what your perception is.
• 50:32
  SPEAKER_03: So to me, that's a really hard question to answer.
• 50:35
  SPEAKER_03: Not the consequences part, but should it be severe?
• 50:38
  SPEAKER_03: Or should it be?
• 50:39
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 50:39
  SPEAKER_02: That's right.
• 50:40
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 50:40
  SPEAKER_02: So sometimes what we want to do is we want to fix it so we make it very severe.
• 50:44
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 50:44
  SPEAKER_02: And uh and that gets into a whole nother thing.
• 50:47
  SPEAKER_02: How many times do we forgive?
• 50:49
  SPEAKER_02: And what did Christ say?
• 50:51
  SPEAKER_02: Seventy times seven.
• 50:52
  SPEAKER_02: So um I don't know if anybody's got a calculator and they're working on it and say, yeah, that's a lot.
• 50:57
  SPEAKER_02: It's a lot, basically keep going to forgive, but that does not uh equate that there isn't a consequence for behavior.
• 51:05
  SPEAKER_02: And some that's why we have jails, we have prisons, we have uh you can't do that here anymore.
• 51:10
  SPEAKER_02: Those are consequences, but forgiveness can still be extended in the process of that.
• 51:15
  SPEAKER_02: Well, we want to thank the uh the listener to uh our community, our mission, for being our first fan mail uh contributor to this.
• 51:23
  SPEAKER_02: And Josh, tell people again how they can um ask their question or even make a comment that we can bring to the podcast and discuss.
• 51:29
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, absolutely.
• 51:30
  SPEAKER_01: So if you're listening to this episode in the description, there's gonna be a link to send in your fan mail.
• 51:36
  SPEAKER_01: So click that link and fill it out and we'll bring it in.
• 51:39
  SPEAKER_01: See if we can get to it.
• 51:40
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, all right.
• 51:40
  SPEAKER_01: Lamanda, anything else, Miriam?
• 51:43
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 51:43
  SPEAKER_03: No, this was the yeah, no, this was a hard one.
• 51:46
  SPEAKER_03: It's a hard one.
• 51:47
  SPEAKER_03: But it's a good one.
• 51:48
  SPEAKER_03: It's important.
• 51:49
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 51:50
  SPEAKER_02: So again, thank you to who wrote this in, and we're looking for forward to more of these kind of discussions.
• 51:54
  SPEAKER_02: If you'd like more information about Topeka Rescue Mission, as we said before, you can go to trmonline.org.
• 52:00
  SPEAKER_02: That's T R Monline.org.
• 52:02
  SPEAKER_02: And also the Topeka Rescue Mission Facebook, where this podcast will be available.
• 52:07
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for listening.