Latest / Twin Mom Life / Expecting a Singleton After Twins, Working Mom Life & Twin Boy Dynamics with Anastasia Lohmann
Transcript
- Anastasia: I think all twin moms need to know they are made for this, they are chosen Jess Sittig: Mm. Anastasia: for this, there are no coincidences. And so to keep that in mind, the highs of highs, the lows of lows, like you are made to be a twin mom. Jessielee Sittig: Hello and Welcome to the Twin Mom Life podcast. I'm your host, Jess. I created this podcast to help build community, connection, and most importantly, friendships among moms of multiples. Being a twin mom can be amazing and magical. That twin bond is unlike anything I've ever witnessed, but it can also be isolating and overwhelming. I'll be chatting with other twin moms, diving deep into the twin experience. giving advice on what works for us so you don't have to learn the hard way. Juggling two babies at the same time is challenging, but I'm confident we can learn from each other and figure out how to raise these babies together. Jess Sittig: Welcome to the podcast. So today we have Anastasia. How are you doing? Anastasia: I'm good. I'm so excited to be here. Thank you for having me. Jess Sittig: Me too. I'm so excited. We've already talked for 20 minutes. And I'm like, I guess Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: we I guess we probably should start like recording the podcast. Anastasia: We just want a gab. Jess Sittig: Yes, absolutely. I know it's been so fun to chat online and then to finally chat live. I keep saying in person. I know we're not in person, but it is fun to see you and feel like we're in person. Yeah. Anastasia: The next best thing for sure, and yes, it definitely feels like I already said this, but catching up with a bestie because I already feel like we already Jess Sittig: Yes. Anastasia: have friends. Jess Sittig: Yes, for sure. Well, I can't wait to dive into all of the things like I was telling you offline. We have too much to talk about. So Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: let's let's get started. Can you tell us a little bit about yourself? Anastasia: Yes, absolutely. So my name is Anastasia. I often go by Anna. I feel like that is more of a personable name. official name is Anastasia, but I live in Southwest Michigan with my husband. I have twin toddler boys who just turned three a couple weeks ago, named Eli and Leo. We have a dog named Zuri, and we're also expecting baby number three in March, which is a girl. So we are so excited and over the moon. I work in marketing full time and on the side I am trying my hand at content creation, where I share all things motherhood as well as just being creative and slowing down in life and enjoying what we are always told to hustle for, but enjoying the the cozy and the chaos. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. I love it. that's like, okay. I have to ask the next question before I already dive into it. Cause Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: I have so many. Did you fill your cup today? Or do you have plans to do so? Anastasia: Yes, I did. so two things. My husband actually surprised me with our favorite bakery. And so I had a little bakery item to start the day, which was amazing. But Jess Sittig: Ooh Yum. Anastasia: also separately, I signed up for a 5K with my best friend Jess Sittig: Wow, go you. Anastasia: I I'm really in we'll see how it goes. This pregnancy, I'm like, you know what, there's one in there. So I'm more up to I'm gonna s I'm gonna say this right now, but we're gonna exercise this time around because that first one kicked my butt. Jess Sittig: my gosh, I tried with the boys and I was so nauseous. I went to Pilates and I was like, Anastasia: Yes. Mm. Jess Sittig: I cannot. I'm gonna throw up. And then I and Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: then I just didn't ever. Anastasia: I thought I would be one of those people, still think but I'm gonna be one of those people, but that first time around, just the feeling of it, I was like, this is off-putting. So I'm trying. I have been running a little, so we are fingers crossed going to run most of it. Jess Sittig: Okay. Well, and I also love that you're doing it with a friend because then that just makes it fun. So. Anastasia: Yes. Yes, I know. I had a friend who I was gonna do it with. She dropped out and I told my best friend that. She's like, well I'll do it with you. And so she's traveling to come do it with me. And I was like, Thank you so much. Jess Sittig: that's really special and super fun. I love that. Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: Okay. What was the bakery item that you had this morning? Anastasia: It was a blueberry muffin and it's this small little bakery that is in our little town and I like I can I have to restrain myself from going there all the time. Jess Sittig: Is that your craving right now? baked goods? Are you having any crazy cravings? Anastasia: not really. I'd say more salty this time around. The first time with the boys was like, Give me sweets all day long. so I think I'm more of a natural sweet person. So but this craving for this pregnancy is salty. Jess Sittig: I'm thinking I was trying to think back to my pregnancies also. So we have the opposite. So I have twin boys, but I had them second. And then I had my singleton daughter first. So that's super fun. I love, Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: love those dynamics. It's so awesome. But I think in the beginning, I was sick with both of them, way more sick with the boys. So I feel like I couldn't stomach sweets. But then when the sickness got over with the boys, it was like cake, cookies, all of Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: it. And then my daughter. When you were saying that you were craving more salty, I was obsessed with Greek salads with like so much Greek dressing. I don't know. I Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: know and that's like I feel like that's really salty. Like I feel like I would eat it and be like, like it's sour and salty and I just needed that. But it's interesting, Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: like cravings with boys versus girls for sure. Anastasia: Totally. And I don't know the wives' tale, but I have noticed the difference where I'm just like, Give me we had similarly, we had ricotta bread and I was like, I could eat the whole thing. this is just so salty and great and garlicky, and I was just loving it. So it is quite the difference because I feel like I did have we ordered out for Italian one night in when I was pregnant with the boys and I had my husband Mark on the note, My wife is pregnant, please have chocolate cake. Cause they didn't have They didn't have it on the like package that we ordered, but we asked to swap and bless them. They did. Jess Sittig: That's so cute. I think that when you're pregnant, it it's like not even a craving. You're like, I have to have this. Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: The baby needs it. So I love that they were like, chocolate cake, yes. We got we got you. Yes. That's Anastasia: Yes, bless them. Yes, absolutely. Jess Sittig: great. Okay. I'm trying to think for me. I've had a very not weird morning. It's just was like a very atypical morning. So my husband had an appointment for knee surgery and I went with him and it was nice. my mom actually took my boys to school and we went to the appointment together and we just had time to talk in the car. And it Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: kind of felt like a little bit of a date, even though we went to a doctor's appointment. Anastasia: Isn't that sad? I totally relate to that. I think what did we do? even the appointments to go to our ultrasound, it was just like, we're we're going by ourselves and it's so easy. Jess Sittig: Yes. Yes. I always am like, is this illegal? Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: this is this feels illegal that we are on a quote unquote date at nine in the morning to go to the doctor, Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: So that was a fun, different morning, but silly. Anastasia: It's all about perspective. Jess Sittig: Yes. Yeah. It was nice to have some one on one time. And it was kind of a far drive. It was like forty five minutes. So we were Anastasia: yeah. Jess Sittig: in the car for like a significant amount of time, but it was good. Anastasia: Totally. Jess Sittig: We're gonna try Anastasia: Good. Jess Sittig: a few things before actual knee surgery to see if that can help. So he's yes, Anastasia: Fingers crossed. Jess Sittig: he's hoping that he can do a few other things. But if not, in six weeks he'll probably need knee surgery because really? Anastasia: I'm so sorry. I have had knee surgery before and I do not wish that yes. I had ACL reconstruction. I don't know if that's what your husband has, but it is killer. It really ha it Jess Sittig: Mm. Anastasia: had played a lot of mental strain on me. It was back in college though, so it was quite a long time ago. But it was just you would take it you take advantage of like the smallest things of like getting in and out of the shower and like that was such a such a battle. Jess Sittig: What was your injury from? Anastasia: playing basketball. Jess Sittig: Okay. Anastasia: I was very into basketball and sports. I ha ever since having the boys though, I have not done much. Jess Sittig: It's so hard to find the time to Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: fill your cup in general, but especially to do a sport like that. I feel like as an adult, even doing like group sports and stuff, it's so hard to to do that and to be on like a committed team. So that's Anastasia: Yes, yes. Jess Sittig: yeah, my husband has a torn meniscus. Anastasia: Mm. Jess Sittig: I maybe it's not a full tear. It's an injury to his meniscus from jujitsu. So Anastasia: Yeah. my goodness. That's super impressive, but also I'm sorry that he got hurt. Jess Sittig: It's it's a very interesting sport because he will come home and he hasn't done jujitsu really very consistently since this happened. So, but before he would come home and I'd be like, you have a black eye, just so calmly. I'm like, in what other I mean, unless you're like a boxer, like what Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: other sport is your wife so calmly like, you're injured on your face. He was like, why don't you do jujitsu with me? I'm like, because of the black eye thing. I'm not Anastasia: Right. Jess Sittig: interested in in that. I'm like, I'm more of a yoga Pilates girl, non-contact. Yes. Anastasia: Low impact, yes, absolutely. Jess Sittig: Yes. So well, hopefully no knee surgery, but we shall see. So in your intro, I feel like you kind of left out something big that you wrote a book. Anastasia: Yeah I did and thank you so much for purchasing. Jess Sittig: Yes, it's the sweetest book ever. It's called Let's Go for a Walk. And what I love about it is that it features twins, your boys, and you, Anastasia: Mm. Jess Sittig: but it's not a book about twins. I think that's Anastasia: Yes, yes, the representation is there. Jess Sittig: yes, I think that's so rare to find. Like, of course, if you are pregnant with twins or you have twin toddlers, maybe you have a board book about what twins are, or like we got books like that for my daughter of like. Mom's gonna have two babies. And those books are great and serve a purpose. But I feel like there isn't a huge market for just more normal stories that include twins. My boys love the book. Like I have to be careful because I'm like, these are delicate pages. Like I don't Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: want it to be ripped, but yeah, they they love it. It's such a great story. I think I was telling you, Anastasia: Thank you. Jess Sittig: like, one of the first times I read it to the boys, we had. Just like a stressful day, lots of crying and stuff. And I read the book and it was like making me emotional. It's it's so sweet. So can you tell us a little bit about the book and your inspiration to write it? Anastasia: Hundred percent and thank you again. it was honestly it came from a day just like that. It was high emotions, tantrums for all, including myself. And I think it was like a really crappy day outside too. And thankfully we live really close to Lake Michigan. and so you know, it's just like, you know what, let's go. It really actually stemmed by like life is just better by the water, right? Like you just feel calmer and that regulation happens and It's just something very natural of when you connect with nature. And so we had one of those days. I took the boys to the lake and we were watching the sunset. So it was very beautiful. And it was like the calming air. You have like the wind blowing in your face. you know, walking away, we felt so much better. But in my mind, I was like, I want to teach my boys about this. I want them to know like that regulation, connecting with nature. Like, how do you teach them when they're so young? And it really just popped into my head. I kid you not, it was just like this is the perfect opportunity. I've always wanted to write a book, didn't know what it was going to be about. And so it really stemmed from there. And obviously on my Instagram you'll see I love gardening right now. I love birds. And so the pages kept kind of popping into my head of like, like listening to the birds sing or watching flowers grow. Like how do you make a lesson out of that? Where it's consumable for toddlers, but also has like genuine storytelling behind it for them to learn about. So I think that was kind of the idea around it, but also the inspiration because I think as an adult, those are learnings that we need to have as well. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah. I feel like you so eloquently put into words when I'm just like, everybody go outside. Because I feel like it so quickly can change people. Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: People, my kids. It can change mine and my kids' mood by getting outside, feeling the grass, having fresh air, hearing the birds. So I think that's why it was emotional for me, particularly after a really hard day, is that it really resonated yes, when we all go outside, we're all happier. We're all in better moods. And I did love that like the story the storytelling and the lessons behind it. It's just a sweet book. And then they obviously loved seeing that there was a set of boy twins there, their age. Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: My boys are also three. So they like every page they wanted to know like who is who's who in every page. Like Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: that's what they were really focused on. It was, it was actually Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: fun to like see from their perspective what caught their eye in the book. So Anastasia: Yeah. Absolutely. No. I think funny enough, my kids, were really obsessed with it at the beginning, very rarely ask me to read it now. So they're not I don't think the concept of like them has really set into it of like that's them, but but I do think that like, you know, that let let's go for a walk as the title was definitely the the encouragement or the motivation behind it was like it's so universal, right? Like it's so universal for in those moments of like All right, everybody outside, but let's go for a walk just seems like the f the thing that we resort to to reground ourselves just like you said. Jess Sittig: And what a cool legacy to have built for your children. I know they totally don't get it now that they're like in Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: a book and that you wrote a book and how they don't understand the magnitude of that. And they will one day and it's gonna be super cool when they're like, Whoa, mom, you're so cool. Anastasia: Yeah, I know. I I think about that and I hope that the appre it it will come. The appreciation will come. But I'm already thinking about like, okay, well, with this next baby, I guess this gives me another excuse to try my hand at another one. and I do have a concept in mind and it's basically because my kids are such poor sleepers of let's go to sleep and the importance of sleep. Jess Sittig: love that and I love that it builds off of the same title phrasing as the initial one. That's super cool. I love that. I can't wait to to read it and purchase it. So I got mine from Anastasia: Thank you. Jess Sittig: Amazon, but if someone wanted to to buy, is that where they would go? Anastasia: Yes, so I did publish through Amazon. that is the place to get it. And like you said, I think even looking quickly are around for twin books, it was just a lot of them are about being twins, but that subtle difference of the representation with the storyline being completely different, that's what makes the difference. So yes, it is on Amazon. appreciate any support reviews or anything that anyone could provide. I just am it is something I'm really proud of. Jess Sittig: Yeah, and you should be. And I feel like that brings me to like how how are you doing this all? Like you have twins and you wrote a book and you have a job outside of this and you're doing content creation. Like what kind of time management skills? I mean, they're on another level, and I'd love to to learn a little bit about how you're managing all of Anastasia: That is a great question. And I wish I had a very handbook answer of this is this is exactly Jess Sittig: Ha ha ha. Anastasia: what I'm doing. a lot of I think the benefit of having a supportive partner is a really big factor into this. And so if I needed an hour or two, he would take the boys and go to the playground or go somewhere with them, which was really helpful. and he still does that if there's like getting ready for their birthday party. I was doing all sorts of crafts and so he was more than willing to do so. So very thankful for my husband Ethan. on top of which, nap time is a game changer as Jess Sittig: Mm. Anastasia: well. And there are some nights where I am editing at night or even laying with the boys and I'm editing and I just don't have the sound. So it is a lot of like creatively, maybe I'm not you know, taking the time to do something like cr watch a T V show or if I'm watching a T V show multitasking. So not a great answer, if you will, but I think it's just really finding those opportunities where I can lean on my partner. I have a spare moment and doing things that I know that are going to in the end fulfill my cut because that's thing those are things I want to do. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. I think that's that's so big. And that's something that I'm personally still working on. not scrolling my phone. It's such a waste of Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: time. And there are very few, of course, sometimes I'll see a post and I'm like, I needed that, I needed to read that or that was motivating, or something, of course. But spending an hour doing that, Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: that doesn't feel cup filling. And then I look at the clock and I'm like, my gosh, how did I just waste an hour of time? So I'm trying to be more mindful of where my time is going. so Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: I love that you were saying like if you are watching an episode of TV, maybe you're multitasking and you're also editing something in the background. I feel Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: like if something is I say often there's not enough time in the day, which is true. But if something Anastasia: Mm. Jess Sittig: is important to you, then you find time to do it. And Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: those other things that maybe aren't as cup filling or life giving will fall to the wayside. So that's great. Anastasia: Hundred percent. Hundred percent. Yeah, it's it's definitely being more mindful with time, which I think is the biggest takeaway. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. And I love that you also brought up your husband. Like that's Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: so true. Like sometimes on the weekend, my daughter is six. She doesn't nap, you know, so she'll do quiet time. And then sometimes while I'm editing a podcast or something, she'll just like keep coming in. And I'm like, I love you, sister. I need one hour of like uninterrupted Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: time. And then my husband will peek in and be like, Let's go play Barbies or, you know, go in the pool or something. So having having that help is really crucial too, so that I can I can actually focus. I'm like an hour, one hour of uninterrupted time, I can get a lot done. Where if I'm constantly Anastasia: Huge. Jess Sittig: being I'm like, my gosh, a task that could take me twenty minutes just took me an hour because I was being interrupted. So Anastasia: Game changing. absolutely. And yes, supportive partner, but also I think someone who like supportive and believes in you, 'cause I think that's another Jess Sittig: Hmm. Anastasia: big thing too, is like he knows I need that time and he knows I'll use it effectively. So, yeah, that that really matters. Jess Sittig: That's really sweet. I love that. it's so okay, I'm looking out the window. I right now am filming the podcast in our bedroom and my husband has like a little, we call it the building. It's like an outdoor shed that he has turned into his office, what we call it the building. And I'm looking at it, I can see it from here. And I have the windows open for natural light. And maybe a month ago, after I was recording a podcast and he could see me, as he's coming into the house or something and I'm talking. And after the podcast, when I was done recording, he was like, That was so cool to see you in your element. And I was like, Anastasia: Mm. Jess Sittig: Really? And I was like, and it made me all emotional that he Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: noticed that I was super into the conversation and excited. And he was like, That was really cool. I'm like, it was really sweet. So it's Anastasia: My gosh That's so sweet. Jess Sittig: So I love that you brought that up, not only supportive, but they do believe in like what you're doing. Anastasia: Yes, yes. my gosh, that is so special, making me emotional as well. But yes, it's so important. I feel like even with content creation, there's times where I'm like, Ethan, I think I need to quit. And he has never encouraged that or he just is so supportive. He's like, just keep going, just keep going. You're so good at it. So yes, it's it's that is like the key into a lot of success. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah. I feel like there have been so many times this past year where if I'm hitting a technical difficulty, that has been the hardest thing in this podcast is like I am not a techie girl. The whole camera and using this, and I have had some tech technical difficulties that I've had to work through, and I'm still working through that. But times like that, or I'm like, do I wanna say this? reaching out to someone and maybe getting rejected. all of those things, it hurts where you're like, should I keep doing what I'm doing? Maybe I should just quit. And yeah, every time he's been like, no, I think you should keep doing what you're doing. And also you have to love it. you shouldn't be doing it to do it. You should do it because you want to do it and you love it. And that doesn't mean it's always going to be easy though. So Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: it's been nice to have a cheerleader, a little, a little cheerleader to behind closed doors. So Anastasia: Totally, absolutely. Jess Sittig: Yeah. take a moment for our supportive partners. Anastasia: Yeah. A moment of celebration for them. Jess Sittig: Yes. Okay. So I would love to talk about the boy boy dynamic. Anastasia: Yes, absolutely. And Jess Sittig: Okay, so Anastasia: I was just gonna say the probably the epitome of my handle, Chaos Meets Cozy. Jess Sittig: Yeah, that's that'll that'll do it. That's exactly Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: like summarizes it so perfectly. Well, I was gonna ask you, have your boys gone to the ER yet? Anastasia: my gosh, no. And I remember when you posted about that and I was just like, Our time is coming Jess Sittig: I jinxed it. I jinxed it so hard because I feel like I was talking to someone on the podcast and I was like, Anastasia: No boy. Jess Sittig: I have three kids, two of them are boys, and we've never gone to the ER. I'm like, why? Why would I ever say something like that out loud? Like, Anastasia: Ja Jess Sittig: why? I think it's because a lot of people who see that I have two boys are like, have you gone to the ER yet? You know, it's just like Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: a matter or has anyone broken a bone or whatever? So it's like I feel like other other moms who are maybe older who had boys are kind of looking at me like it's just a matter of time, my dear. Anastasia: we have not gone to the ER, we've gone to urgent care. That is much different though. it does count. Well Jess Sittig: Okay, that counts. Well Anastasia: well not for the same reason though at all. So I feel like yours is definitely like Jess Sittig: Okay. I guess Anastasia: rightfully so. Jess Sittig: I should say for an injury. have you seen been seen by a doctor for an injury that needed medical care outside of what you could provide in your home? Anastasia: The only the what we did do urgent care was we had hot coffee spilled on us and so that was Jess Sittig: Ooh. Anastasia: a bit traumatic for us all. but a really good learning lesson and it wasn't anything too severe, but but no, I I think like that is less of their own doing and more accidental, so but I do feel like yours was more like very much more into a boy a boy thing. Jess Sittig: Well, so I will tell you that was the third and final I hesitate saying that word. Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: Right, of that stint of all three of them. It was my daughter and my other son who had more like medical things that needed to be evaluated. more health related versus injury related. And then yes, so for people who didn't see on Instagram, my son baby B threw a rock at my son, baby A. And it it caused an injury where there was a lot of blood and he did need a staple. It was just one staple because it was like the top of the back of his head. And the doctor and we did not, I should specify, we did not go to the ER. We did just go to an urgent care once it stopped bleeding. so I should say that. And like we ER versus urgent care, you know, but Anastasia: Yeah, same same. Jess Sittig: I was not home. I was actually on my way to go have dinner with friends and Anastasia: no. Jess Sittig: my husband called me. I knew I'm like, he would never call me ever unless something was wrong. If he needed to, I don't know, ask a question, he would just text me. So I answered and I just immediately knew. I was like, what's wrong? And he was like, Well, Wayland, and I'm like, is why it hurt? Like the way that he was like, I love my kids so much, but they have like I knew who hurt who. Anastasia: Yep, yep, yep, that sounds about right. Yeah, yeah. Jess Sittig: Do you know what mean? Yes. So yeah, when he was like, Well, Wayland was holding a rock. And I'm like, is Wyatt okay? And he was like, Well, there's a lot of blood. And I'm like, okay. And so I knew that it was, I'm like, okay, do you need to like hang up with me and call 911? Like how I don't know how serious this is. And then he sent me the picture of the rock. And I was like, Why are you doing this while I'm driving? I mean, Anastasia: No, no. Jess Sittig: Come on. So my mother-in-law is a nurse and she's specifically a pick you nurse, which we are so grateful for because we will Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: text her pictures of rashes. And then with this, we texted her a picture. And by the time he had cleaned it up, even my husband, who would probably be like, it's fine. He was like, I'm pretty sure this is gonna need like a staple or two. And then when I got home, I was like, Yes. Like the good thing is he never lost consciousness. We weren't worried about like a concussion or anything, but he He did in fact need a staple. And then Anastasia: my gosh. Jess Sittig: more recently, this did not. I feel like I'm like, should I say, should I say these stories? Because maybe the next one just makes me seem like a bad mom. it's just real. Okay. Anastasia: Yes, it is very real. Jess Sittig: We were outside playing with like those. Those toy cars that you can drive. Do I I don't know what that's called, like a toy car. Yeah, like it has a motor. Yes, it's like Anastasia: The the big motor n not like motorized, but the electric Yeah, yeah. Jess Sittig: an electric vehicle that's like child size. Okay. They Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: have remote controls that we do, but my daughter has been old enough for a while to kind of like drive her own around the cul-de-sac. And then one of my sons just learned that he could like touch the pedal like with his foot and that he could drive it. So we were like, okay, we live on a couple acres. We're just letting him try to figure out. Okay. And then my other son comes running next to the car, and I just see it happening. I'm like, my gosh. So I'm trying to run to grab my other son. It's too late. He's under the car. So the same one who threw the rock and hurt the other one ran his brother over. So Anastasia: No Jess Sittig: I'm like, I just have to I'm like, yeah, he got ran over, but it was by like a motorized child vehicle. So he he Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: had, I mean, he was upset and he had road rash and stuff, but it was nothing like this needs urgent attention. But it's Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: one of those things where I was like, having two boys the same age is crazy. Anastasia: It's crazy. It's so crazy. The energy is real. The build off each other is real. I like the instincts of a boy too are just like smash, destroy, like throw, all of the things. So I totally get it. And yes, I mean, I feel like we've had some instances too where I'm just like, why was that your first instinct to do that? Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Can you can you tell us an example of one of those stories where you're like, what's happening? Anastasia: just last night, we know we're getting them ready for bath and they're they're they're stripped down and the other one just slaps the other one on the back and I'm just like, What what are we doing? Why? Jess Sittig: why? Anastasia: Yeah, and I think we've had some thrown racks before, but nothing nothing of that nature. but yeah, knock on wood. It's it's who knows? So I think like there's definitely smaller examples, but actually at their school, they've been separated in their classroom. And I really took that hard because when it happened, they were two. So I'm like, you know, it's the they're toddlers. Like, what do you want from them? But at the end of the day, it was probably the best thing for them, not only because of their energy-wise, like they just kind of revert to like this is my safe person, so I'm gonna act out type of feel. but also personality wise, baby B is actually very timid and shown in the book, actually. That's how he's represented is like he stays close to mom, kind of observes his brother, and the other one is more outwardly curious and more adventurous. And so that was shown up being showing up in the classroom. And so the teachers have suggested let's separate them and see how they do. And so baby B has really independence and gotten his own friends and just really grown into him himself and also it's easier for the teachers to manage. So I I understand where they're coming from and I've actually come around to it where I'm like, no, let's leave them separate because I think they're doing well and they ha they don't resort to that build off each other energy. Jess Sittig: Get that. We'll we'll see what happens. My boys just started school and they are in the same classroom. And I I would like it to be like that. However, if there was something where they were being destructive or something, then I would absolutely be like, okay, then let's try separating them and see what happens. So it's so interesting, Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: though, like when you were saying he just like walked up and slapped him. I'm like, yeah, that happens often in our house. And it it'll be like the kind of thing. This happened recently where they're like hugging and it's like they're so excited, and then they're on the floor wrestling. And I'm like, Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: what just happened? And I I'm all about, I'm like, yes, like get out that energy, wrestle as long as everyone is happy. And the second that someone says stop or whatever, then like you get off right away. And it's an interesting thing to monitor. I'm like, okay. We're wrestling, we're on the floor. I'm like, okay, that just got okay, everybody, everybody get off of each other. That just got too, you know. So it's kind of this like Anastasia: Hundred percent. Jess Sittig: hard line of like wanting to encourage, I don't know, like movement and wrestling in a fun way and then making sure that it doesn't ever get too physical or that someone's getting hurt or Anastasia: Yes. And it's funny, I don't know if this happens with you, but my threshold is much lower than if my husband is watching them and he'll let them go, even if they're screaming or yelling, and I'm like, this needs to stop climbing or getting them off each other. And so it's very different. Jess Sittig: A hundred percent. I'll have to walk out. My husband does this thing. The kids love it. He just throws them on the couch. It's Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: like just and they they think it's the best thing ever in the whole world. And they're being thrown onto like a cushions on the couch. You know, they're all like Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: giggling hysterically. And I'm just like, I can just see. I'm like, broken arms. gosh, head. Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: I can just y you can see it and Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: I don't know why he can't see it. Anastasia: It's that mom instinct, I swear. I swear it is. Jess - Community Waitlist: Hey, it's Jess. I wanted to pop on and say hi. I hope you're enjoying the episode. Before we get back to it, I wanted to share something really exciting with you. If you've been listening to the Twin Mom Life podcast for a while, you know how passionate I am about helping twin moms feel less alone. And that's exactly why I created the Twin Mom Life Community Membership. I know firsthand how overwhelming twin motherhood can be, and how much it means to connect with other moms who just get it. Whether you're pregnant with twins, in the thick of the newborn stage, or chasing toddlers like I am, you deserve a space where you feel understood, supported, and connected. The Twin Mom Life Community Membership is a place to build those connections with monthly live community calls, a private chat board, and opportunities to get to know other twin moms beyond just listening to the podcast. You'll get a behind-the-scenes look at the podcast, opportunities to submit questions for upcoming guests, and the chance to apply to be a guest yourself. One member will be chosen monthly to share their story on the pod. So if you've been wanting to connect with other twin moms, get support from people who truly understand this season of life, and be a part of a community built specifically for you, this is your time to join. I'm so excited about what we're building, and I would absolutely love for you to be a part of it. I can't wait to connect with you inside the Twin Mom Life Community Membership. Check out the link in the show notes Okay, back to the show. Anastasia: I was also gonna say, similarly to separating them at school, we've also separated them at night. I don't know if you've seen any of my Instagram stories, but they have they get into mischief at night w together. Instead of going to bed, they'll take apart their mattresses, their the bed frames, and it's just like, all right, we my husband and I had enough. We separated them and it's been so much better. And I was so much in the camp of they're gonna share the room the same room, have the same, all the great memories together. And I'm like, this isn't going well. Jess Sittig: Well and maybe they will be able to again when they get older and a little bit more Anastasia: Yes. They will actually need to because we actually need this room for baby, so Jess Sittig: Okay, there you go. So did you find that happening when they moved to big boy beds or like 'cause three is hard. Anastasia: It was three is definitely hard. We actually had because we lived in Chicago before we moved to Michigan. And so we had a small townhouse we were in. So we had mini cribs that fit into this little small room into their nursery. And the mini cribs are much more lightweight, like mattresses as well as like the frame isn't just as well built. So we actually had to catapult them into the twin beds, like probably before they were ready because their beds were breaking because they would Jess Sittig: Okay, sure. Anastasia: jump. And the bed frame was just broken all the time, where I'm like, if they were sleeping and maybe they leaned a little bit the wrong way, the bed frame would wake. So it's like, okay, this is becoming a hazard. But I would say Jess Sittig: Sure. Anastasia: for sure it probably escalated a little bit more once we were in the twin beds. Jess Sittig: Yeah, we've had some struggles lately with that, specifically at nap time. I feel like bedtime, not yet. I I Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: feel like they're like tired and they're ready to go to bed. But at nap time, like I feel like it's also because they're getting close to that maybe stopping napping age, which is so hard because with my daughter, we do quiet time, but at Three, it's really hard to get them to do a quiet activity alone or alone Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: with their brother for an extended period of time. And there have been Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: times where we put them, they're still in cribs right now. They can absolutely climb out. So we had to go through this whole phase of like, my gosh, should we switch to big boy beds? And Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: it kind of works just being like, you guys have to stop doing this. And then I think we said, like, maybe not making seam. I'm trying to remember exactly what happened, but we were able to say, Boys, you guys have to stop jumping out or whatever, or we're gonna have to. you know what? We bought those mesh things where it almost looks like like a malaria net or something. That have you seen those that it has like the zippers? I bought Anastasia: Yeah, yeah. Yes. Yes. Jess Sittig: those and was like showing them, like, do you guys want this on your crib? And they were like, No, like I they Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: had such a weird reaction to it, and I was like, and then they they stopped. Anastasia: That's great. Jess Sittig: Yeah, I was like, Okay. And then now sometimes I don't even know how they can physically do this, but they will take the sheets off of their mattress in their crib and just throw everything out of their crib. And then they'll Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: eventually fall asleep like 70% of the time. So then I go in there to get them up from nap and it looks like a frat house. There's like, Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: I'm like, what did you guys do to your room? So Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: I could absolutely see us having to separate them, especially if it was affecting nighttime sleep. Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: then we'd be like, okay, we have no other option if they're not sleeping. So that's hard. Anastasia: Ugh. Jess Sittig: I'm glad that separating them worked. And how did they handle that? Anastasia: I think so twin B, which is Leo, he has a really hard time with that separation. eventually he kind of got around to you know, you get him a special night light, you get him special this, special that, and he feels a little bit more at ease. But there's been times where he's like, I want Eli to sleep with me and so it's just really heartbreaking 'cause Eli's very independent. He's like, I'm good. So it's you know, it's still a battle and I am no expert at sleep. I wish wish we had a lot better sleep than we do. Jess Sittig: Yeah, I feel like that's just always tough, especially if they're like messing around. But I'm glad it's helped a little bit with Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: sleep issues and stuff. And then maybe by the time it's time to get the nursery ready, you guys can try again and just my fingers crossed that everything like that's a smooth transition for you guys. Anastasia: That's the hope. I think the other battle we have, I don't know if this happens with your boys too, but one will go to sleep pretty much within like, you know, twenty minutes and then one other one will stay awake for I don't know, until like nine thirty and we'll put him down at like seven thirty and he'll just be talking to himself, gabbing away. So I think those are signs that he probably could go without a nap or a shorter nap, but it where they're in school, where they all nap still and he'll fall asleep if he can. But so I don't know. We're just in this rough transition and how to get them on the same schedule again. Jess Sittig: That's been probably the hardest thing like from the get-go is just such different sleep needs between my boys. So Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: I I have three kids, obviously. And my baby A, I've never had a baby who like asks when nap time is. He loves to sleep. He is like, Anastasia: Yeah. that's great. Jess Sittig: my gosh, he's like, Mama, is it nap time? Like, and then when the timer goes off for bedtime, he's like, bedtime. Like he's pumped. I've never, it's not. I know it's it's like not a normal we're grateful. But Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: then baby B always wakes up from nap early, is typically the one like while baby A is sleeping, baby B will be like like, I don't know, yelling his brother's name. And I'm like, shh. So Anastasia: Yeah. Yeah. Jess Sittig: that's always been a hard thing to navigate. Where with naps, I've been able to sneak in there, grab the one who's awake, and then the other one will sleep through it. That now Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: that they're getting older. That happens way less. me opening the door will just wake up the other one. So I have been relatively impressed though how much they can actually sleep through each other talking. Anastasia: It is it is quite impressive because I you know, similarly, I think our B and my your B sounds like my A. yes. Jess Sittig: Yes, they're total opposites. Mm-hmm. Anastasia: But w similarly, he'll just start yelling and it's just like, thank gosh he's not waking up because you are I can hear you out in the living room while you're in your room. Like that is so loud. So it is Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yes. Anastasia: quite impressive, and I think it is a benefit of, you know, like having them be twins because they're so used to in the womb and throughout. You like when they're babies, they're just used to hearing the other person. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's almost like they can tune it out a little bit easier. So Anastasia: Yeah, totally. Jess Sittig: it has been so fun as they've gotten older, like hearing if they both are awake and they're just like not falling asleep yet. They're little conversations or arguments. It is hilarious. The most recent one, my husband was dying, is they are like fighting over who's the superhero. Like one Anastasia: No. Jess Sittig: of my sons is like, I'm Batman. And then my other son is Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: like, I'm Batman. And they're just going at it for ten minutes. I'm like, okay. It's hilarious. It's so fun. Yes. Anastasia: Yes. They're so cute. I think it's adorable. My my Eli, my twin A actually, he predicted that I was pregnant. And I kid you not, Jess Sittig: Really? Anastasia: yes. it was before school and I kind of intuitively took a pregnancy test. Like I just kind of was like, without providing too many details, I was like, it's either I'm ovulating or I'm pregnant. I don't know. So I took both tests and it shot positive. so of course I'm one number scared that it's twins again, but I was further along than I thought. And so I'm like telling Ethan while he's getting like the boys ready. It was chaotic. It was just like I was such in shock that I was like, I prayed it. I didn't tell the boys though. Like the boys were not in the room, they didn't understand. and so Ethan drops them off at daycare and their teacher comes up to Ethan and goes, Are you guys expecting another kid? Or did anyone ask you if you're expecting another kid? And Ethan's like, no. And apparently the day before, so this is before I even tested positive, Eli told his class that he was getting a baby sister. So he not only said that, but he also got the gender right. So I'm pretty sure my kid is psychic. Jess Sittig: That is wild. my gosh. That's so cool. Yeah. I I love stuff like that. I love that. Anastasia: Isn't it wild? I know. I like they're just so intuitive and I just feel like how we you know, like maybe months ago we had asked like do you want a baby brother, baby sister? But the timing is not mistaken. Like that is just crazy. Jess Sittig: Yeah, that's wild the day before. You're like, How did you know? Anastasia: Yeah. Knew before I did, that's for sure. So it was very cool, Jess Sittig: School. Anastasia: especially when we found out the gender. I was like, my gosh. Jess Sittig: I love that. So we when my daughter was potty training, she always had like the hardest time pooing in the potty. So when she did, we took her to Target to like pick out something special. And she picked out twin dolls. And at the time I just was thinking like she just wanted two dolls, you know? But now we're like, my gosh, how did she? It's just crazy. Like the the foreshadowing. Yeah, for sure. Anastasia: crazy. There's no coincidences. I'm a strong believer of that. Jess Sittig: Yeah, it's really cool. She did pick out boy girl twins, but then thinking back, I'm like, I don't think there were several options of twins, Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: I think it was just one twin Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: doll set. So that's really cool. I love that. He knew, he predicted it. Anastasia: Yeah. I know. And it's funny and how I was getting to that is that they were having a l little like back and forth the other night, similarly like your boys, but Eli was saying, No, baby sister is mine and you can have baby Kenny, which is my niece. Jess Sittig: Ha ha ha ha. Anastasia: And so they're fighting over who gets baby sister and I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, both of you get baby sister. We're not claiming my sister's baby. Jess Sittig: That's so cute. I love that. Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: Well, okay, and on that on that note, so going from twins, what made you guys decide to have one more? Anastasia: Gosh, I think we've always wanted three. We just didn't know we would get here so quickly. and so I think even just going through that pregnancy to begin with, with the boys, it just felt like, gosh, like for this to be my only pregnancy, for this to be my only experience, it just didn't sit right with me. and Jess Sittig: Mm, mm-hmm. Anastasia: I don't know why. I don't know what that is. Is is that a yearning for more or not being fulfilled with with the experience that I had, which was great by the way. I had a great pregnancy with the boys. I had a little bit of a rocky delivery, but the boys were healthy and that's more than we could ask for. So when we did start trying, I mean you obviously know the odds are higher when you have fraternal twins. We knew that was a chance, but for some reason I just had an intuition like it's gonna be one, it's gonna be one, it's gonna be okay. So thankfully that is the case. Not that having twin two sets of twins is bad, but I just don't think in this stage of life like I was mentally prepared for another set of twins. We would have been happy if it would though. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah, I I get that because so after my daughter was born for several months, even into the first two years, there was no convincing me but I could have another. I was like, my gosh, like Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: she was born during COVID. It was crazy. There Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: was no way. And then I don't know, something changed when she was like two. And I was like trying to explain it to my husband. And it was like the same thing. Like I just couldn't exactly put it into words. I just was like, I feel like our family isn't complete. And that like I I wouldn't be able to go on with that feeling and not try Anastasia: huh. Jess Sittig: to, you know, for another, another baby. And then, you know, the funny thing is we always said, for sure one, maybe two, never three, which is just hilarious. Yeah, Anastasia: Yeah. And you never say never. Jess Sittig: never say never. That's exactly right. So yeah, it's just interesting. I and and having it the opposite way. So obviously I had a singleton and then twin. So I knew honestly, the second we found out with it was twins, I'm like, okay, well then our family is complete Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: with three. But if it was the opposite way, I'm not sure, I'm not sure what we would have done, especially with having a little bit of the added, I don't know if I want to say fear, but a little bit of Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: that. potential increase of having a second set of twins. So Anastasia: Hundred percent. And I I think we chatted about it before, but I look around at all the twin moms that I know for the majority of that point, or otherwise I see maybe on social media people who have subsequent kids, but it's always the last, it feels like. You always have the twins last and so if you know anyone who has twins first and then babies after, I'm so curious on like, you know, their journey and to learn from them because I think in my mind And I don't know the right words for this, but it's not so much of a redemption, but more so I'm so Jess Sittig: Mm. Anastasia: excited to experience both ends of it because it was hard, right? it it would maternity leave was such a blessing, but also so hard to take care of babies all by yourself. my husband got a few weeks off, which again, a blessing. But you know, what is it like to have one baby that I can go do all the things with on maternity leave and go to baby classes? Cause that was one thing I was like so sad. of not having that community of being able to like, well I can't take both and like hold both and go to music class. So I'm excited to see what it is like on on the singleton side. Jess Sittig: I'll try to think through people I've had on or friends who had twins first and then a singleton, because I feel like you're right, it's typically the opposite from like Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: a lot of people that I can think of. One of my friends, Maya, had twins first and then a singleton, but it's a very big age gap, like maybe seven years, which I just think is different. Like that that Anastasia: Mm. okay. Yep. Jess Sittig: changes things versus having, you know, a newborn and and two toddlers. And I think it is cool. to have that perspective of twins first, because I not that I think you're gonna think it's easy, because have having a newborn isn't easy, but having Anastasia: No. Jess Sittig: two newborns and then being able to experience one, I think you're already talking about it with gratitude of Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: because I think it is like having a singleton and then twins. It's very, very special to experience both. Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: And it's interesting because I think of twins as my redemptive postpartum, which isn't Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: like a typical thing to say. But I had and it was still extremely hard. I was so sleep deprived. Like it that was not easy. But compared Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: to the situation I was in with having her during COVID and being so isolated, not having any Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: help, it would just was wildly different. So even just comparing like First postpartum to second postpartum, whether it's twins or a singleton, I think it can be, I think that it will probably be. I'm like trying to phrase this how I want. I don't think it's gonna be a better experience per se, but having the perspective of like Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: already being a mom, it just changes. I think it'll change your postpartum. And I hope it's for the better. Like I am so much more. Of a laid-back mom now. And I don't know if that's because I had twins or because I had more children, but it gave me the gift of like freedom and a little bit of a a losing or letting go of that control. Because the first time around, I was like holding on to this like perfect schedule. I have to be in control of this. She has to go to sleep at 12. And if it's 1203, I'm gonna freak out. Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: And I had to let that go the second time around. And Yeah, so I'm just excited for you to be able to experience both. Anastasia: Yes. I think you're right. It is that second time around where you just have a lot more experience and wisdom. and I think you've also talked about your postpartum irritability and anger. Is that right? I Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Anastasia: had that to a T as well. And I just feel like, yes, I'm worried not worried, but I am conscious of, you know, my first time around experience, but letting go and being able to understand you have to go with the flow in order for things to work. I think that is going to be huge this next time around where it is a little bit more of a a redemptive, okay, now I I know and I can be better. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah. I think that was a big thing for me too. So with my daughter, I struggled with postpartum depression. And then that was something that I was like so keenly aware of and almost like looking out for where like I didn't even know what to look for, what to how that would feel being postpartum. And then I think the the perception is really nice in that perspective because you know certain things are not gonna last forever. Anastasia: Mm. Jess Sittig: And I knew that the twins were my last babies. And I think that helped me enjoy the hard parts more. Where I did not enjoy the hard parts with my daughter. I was like, this is motherhood. This sucks. This is not what I thought it was going to be like. And when the Anastasia: Mm. Jess Sittig: boys, I'm like, I am so tired, but one day I'm not going to ever see the newborn scrunch again. And I am Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: so tired, but one day they're not going to sleep on me like this because they're going to be too big. So Anastasia: Hundred percent. Jess Sittig: I feel like that helped me enjoy the hard parts a little bit more. Anastasia: Yes, perspective. Perspective being the key of this whole conversation, I think, is the biggest Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Anastasia: takeaway. It is game changing. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah. What are you, the most excited for and the most nervous for having twins and a singleton? Anastasia: I think, I mean, kind of the same answer for both. Like I am excited for the boys to be big brothers. We like I was mentioning before, we do have my baby niece who just turned one and just seeing them interact with her has been like I cannot wait. Like you're gonna have a baby sister, and they just have already like portrayed them being such big helpers and excited for it. So I'm really excited. And simultaneously, I think I'm also like thinking about the dynamics of how that will change our family and how will my dynamic with my boys change. because I do have, you know, both of them need me in such unique ways compared to each other that I just wanna make sure that stays intact and that we are still a cohesive family, if that makes sense. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah, I absolutely. I remember so I was induced with the boys and I remember the week leading up to the induction. I was crying every day for so many reasons. But Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: specifically, I wasn't quite sure. Like I love Kaya so much. I was like, how can I love two other babies? All how can I all how can I love them all this much? And I Anastasia: Mm. Jess Sittig: asked my mother-in-law that my mother-in-law has two boys. And she was like, You just your heart just grows so much. And you you absolutely have like that much love to give and your capacity grows. And it's so true. I was like scared that I wouldn't be able, not that I wouldn't love them as much. I just didn't understand how, how, how could I possibly love all three that Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: much? And you just can. And I think The first year is just always you're finding your rhythm and the boys are learning how to be big brothers. And it is the coolest thing ever. Like we have the same age gap. And Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: I just love it. It was hard in the beginning, like personally for me, getting used to managing three and things like that. But it just was it's so special to see her be a big sister now. It's the coolest thing. Anastasia: Yeah. No, I'm I'm really looking forward to that. And I just think, it will be yeah, just a big change for us. But really excited to, like you said, see that beautiful relationship between them blossom and to feel that like I have been told that same thing, like your heart just grows and like I can't wait to feel that 'cause right now I just can't picture it. And I know this is completely different, but I feel like I went through the same thing with like, I love my dog so much. I'm gonna have these babies. How am I gonna love them? And they're just the same. And that sounds so funny now that I have the boys, but it's just like kind of going through that like mental exercise of like, I can't picture it, but you just do. Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah. No, it's funny that you said that because we were the same way. our dog was our baby. And and my husband will still we still have the same pup. We've had him for 10 years and we Anastasia: Mm-hmm. Jess Sittig: just still joke about it. he is obviously a huge part of our life and so he's our part of our family and so important. But obviously the love that we feel for our children is beyond words what we feel for our dog. But it's Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: like you you when you love something so much, you're like, how can you love it even something else even more? And You just can and it's Anastasia: Yes. Jess Sittig: it's special. It's really special. So Anastasia: Really special and yes, our poor dog, I feel like because I d you know, break the news to her, Well, you're getting more siblings and you'll you know, you'll just have more to love to Jess Sittig: Yes, yes, exactly. my gosh. And it I know early we were talking about the retreat. That really has been like a dream. I don't know when that would ever happen. But yeah, I think that would be so cool. So cool. I went to Anastasia: Put it out there. I'll be there. my gosh, I think it'd be great. Jess Sittig: right. I went to like one of my friends invite invited me to like a wellness retreat earlier this year. And it was like a yoga retreat and hiking and and stuff. And we did painting. It was so cool. And the whole time I was just thinking. We need to have a twin mom retreat here and just Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: hang out and Go on walks together. And Anastasia: And twin moms twin moms deserve it. Jess Sittig: yes, I totally agree. So I don't know any of the details, but I'm manifesting that that's gonna happen sometime in the future. Anastasia: I'm right there with you. Jess Sittig: Okay. So if you could have a heart to heart with a twin mom or give her a piece of advice, what would you tell her? Anastasia: I think I have three pieces of advice. And I think the first one being like, I think all twin moms need to know they are made for this, they are chosen Jess Sittig: Mm. Anastasia: for this, there are no coincidences. And so to keep that in mind, the highs of highs, the lows of lows, like you are made to be a twin mom. So I think to keep that in mind. similarly to what we were talking about earlier, I think consuming wisely. I remember when I was pregnant with the boys, I just, you know, doom scrolling on trying to sa find the best advice and the the best products that you need. And eventually I just got so frustrated. I'm like, well, everyone's saying something different. So clearly there's no right answer. So I think consuming wisely, or if you do find someone, find someone you trust and and really want to invest your time in, because that is really valuable. And I think the last thing for me is a a lesson I've learned over time is just like two things can be true at once. I Jess Sittig: Hm. Anastasia: think like especially if you have unplanned twins. you could think of your pregnancy and your, you know, newborn stage as very different. You could be very grateful for that, but also mourn that it is, you know, it looks different than what you expected. because they're the biggest bless blessings, but they are very hard work. especially in those newborn days. For me, especially, I just felt like I it's a blur. If you it's a blur from those Jess Sittig: Yeah, same. Anastasia: days. So I think just you know, give yourself grace and to understand like you can feel those feelings but also be completely grateful. Jess Sittig: I love all of those pieces of advice. And I think walking away with those fresh in your head. I I think the one that I always try to remember is that two things can be true at the same time. And it's such a good reminder. I can be having a really hard day and love my kids beyond measure. And just because I'm saying I have a hard day doesn't mean that I feel any different about my kids. So Anastasia: Yes, Jess Sittig: Yeah, Anastasia: yes. Jess Sittig: I I love that. Anastasia: Yeah, absolutely. That's something I also have to remind myself on the daily, so Jess Sittig: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Well, I've had such a good conversation about talking about your book and boy boy twins and Anastasia: Yeah. Jess Sittig: getting pregnant after having twins and it's all so fun. It was such a good conversation. I so appreciate your time and your insight and everything. Thanks for coming on today. Anastasia: Thank you. Thank you for having me and for all of your great questions. I love talking to you. Jess Sittig: Yes, it was so fun. Round two. I'm like, I want to do a whole episode on your book writing process, what publishing looked like, finding a illustrator. I'm like, that's cool. That's so cool. That could Anastasia: Yeah. Yes. Jess Sittig: be a whole episode right there. Anastasia: Yeah, absolutely. Would love to chat again. Jess Sittig: Yay. Jessielee Sittig: Thank you for taking the time out of your busy twin mom life to listen along. I hope this podcast shed some light on a topic that's been on your heart and gave you more confidence as a twin mama. If you know a twin mom, please send this her way. If you like what you heard today, please subscribe to the podcast and leave a review. Check out the show notes to be connected with today's guest and get discount codes for brands I love. See you next Thursday. Until then. You are made for this.