Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 3 - Episode 133 - Are you sacrificing yourself?
Transcript
- 0:01Welcome to the Good Morning From the Chicken Coop Podcast with
- 0:04Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and mastermind set
- 0:08coach. Filled with inspiration,
- 0:10distinctions, perspectives, and possibilities, we help you to
- 0:13cultivate a mindset that leads you to create the best version
- 0:16of yourself you could ever imagine.
- 0:18Join Kim every morning from one of her favorite happy places,
- 0:21her chicken coop along with all her chickens.
- 0:28Hey, everybody. Good morning from the chicken
- 0:30coop. So I want to ask you a question.
- 0:34How much do you think you're sacrificing yourself every day
- 0:37for your job, your family, your, you know, your, whatever it
- 0:44might be in your world? How much do you think you're
- 0:46sacrificing yourself, and is that a bad thing?
- 0:52The question came up with a client recently about how her
- 0:56belief is that she's constantly sacrificing herself for her
- 1:00husband and her children and her boss, and she never, ever takes
- 1:05care of herself. And my perspective was to ask
- 1:11her the question, What's the reason that you do that?
- 1:14What's the reason that you believe you're sacrificing
- 1:18yourself? Not just the fact that she is
- 1:21doing it, but what's the reason she believes she is doing that?
- 1:24Because there's a big difference.
- 1:25Is she actually doing that, or does she just believe she's
- 1:28doing that? And how do you know when you're
- 1:31sacrificing yourself? How do you know when you're not
- 1:34sacrificing yourself? Well, it all comes back to our
- 1:36guiding principles of emotions, right?
- 1:38What our emotions are teaching us, information they are giving
- 1:42us is to help us guide us and to move us closer or further away
- 1:46from the actions we're doing in order to get the outcomes that
- 1:49we eventually want be in most of the time.
- 1:52So to ask you the question, do you think you're sacrificing
- 1:57yourself? And if so, what does that mean?
- 2:00Is that something that makes you happy?
- 2:02Because, again, it's all about perspective on it.
- 2:06So if I sacrifice some of my personal time to spend with my
- 2:10child, is that something that I have to feel resentful about?
- 2:15Well, only if I feel like I'm sacrificing it and it's causing
- 2:19me pain, Then I have to go to a place of saying, well, you know
- 2:24what? I I I don't feel good about
- 2:26this. But if I do it and I say I
- 2:29sacrifice this time with him, but I absolutely love and enjoy
- 2:33it and I'm grateful for the fact that I get to do that because I
- 2:36know I won't have him forever. He's 13 and I know he's going to
- 2:41eventually have a girlfriend and a wife and a life and move on.
- 2:47So I don't look at the time that I spend with him now as
- 2:52something that's taking away from me and what I'm doing
- 2:55because I appreciate the fact that I have this guiding force
- 3:00inside of me that says I can spend time doing things
- 3:06physically and gain gratitude for it emotionally as to the
- 3:12outcomes, like, I don't look at working with my clients, the
- 3:16number of hours that I work with my clients, it's a sacrifice
- 3:20from my personal time or my family.
- 3:22I look at it like it's a blessing that one, I get to help
- 3:26people and two, that I have the ability to see it as a a a gift
- 3:32and in in gratitude. But I'm going to loop back to
- 3:35the question and so you can understand where I'm coming
- 3:38from. If you feel like something is
- 3:41constant sacrifice, then you feel like you're being ripped
- 3:44off. If you feel like you're being
- 3:47ripped off, then you can never get past the fact that you're
- 3:51starting out from a a depleted level.
- 3:55And if you're starting off something in depletion, it just
- 3:59feels like crap every time you start that down that road.
- 4:03So if you walk into work every day and you are saying to
- 4:06yourself, you know, I feel like I sacrifice myself coming here
- 4:09every day and I feel like this. And I feel like that even though
- 4:12they're paying you right, they're they've agreed to give
- 4:14you money and you're trading your time for money.
- 4:16So you entered into this agreement, whatever money you're
- 4:20getting, whether it's a salary or hourly, you have agreed to
- 4:23trade time for money. So are you really sacrificing
- 4:26yourself because you agreed to it?
- 4:29And it's a great simple thing to just start there because that's
- 4:32where the beginning of it all started.
- 4:33They offered you something, you accepted it, and you're doing
- 4:36it. Point 1.2 is you're making an
- 4:41emotional connection and attachment to it if you're being
- 4:45in the state of I'm sacrificing myself for this job.
- 4:48I hate this job. I I feel like I come here every
- 4:51day and a little piece of me dies.
- 4:54I understand that the job might suck and it might not be what
- 4:57they told you, but you still have the ability to change that
- 5:01and nobody else can change it for you.
- 5:03You can decide I want to go somewhere else.
- 5:05I want to do something else. And maybe that's the lesson in
- 5:09this. Maybe that's what you're
- 5:11supposed to be doing. Maybe you're supposed to be
- 5:12figuring out something else for yourself.
- 5:14And the pain is here to teach you something.
- 5:17And it's not just about you sacrificing yourself.
- 5:21It's about you learning that you've got to go beyond it.
- 5:24But nobody can answer those questions but you.
- 5:27The point of this conversation is, if you believe that you're
- 5:30sacrificing yourself any every day, are there moments which we
- 5:34all have to like, give a little bit of ourselves and we have to
- 5:37say, oh, you know that, sure, those happen.
- 5:40But if your predominant state is that of sacrificing yourself,
- 5:45it's not about the thing or the person or anything else.
- 5:49It's about you and your perspective and you taking
- 5:51responsibility and changing your own mindset and your own
- 5:55situation. Because nobody can else can do
- 5:57either for you. Nobody else can make you get a
- 5:59different job. Nobody else can change your
- 6:00mind. It's all an internal job.
- 6:03And if you're starting from sacrifice, you're already
- 6:06starting in a place of depletion.
- 6:07So I'm going to challenge you to go and look and say, you know,
- 6:10am I really sacrificing myself every day or is this just an
- 6:14agreement I've entered into and I've become complacent about it
- 6:17and now I'm angry about it and now I'm just, I got to get out
- 6:19of it. That might be more accurate than
- 6:22you're sacrificing yourself every day and when you get clear
- 6:26on it, then you can change it. Otherwise you'll just be angry
- 6:29and you'll do nothing. So hopefully you guys will be
- 6:33able to take some wisdom from this and go out and shift any
- 6:37situations that are not working for you any longer and move
- 6:40forward. I hope you guys have a very
- 6:42blessed day and I will see you tomorrow.