Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / Some narcissists dont love you, they are just obsessed

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Some narcissists dont love you, they are just obsessed · The Mental Healness Podcast

• 0:00
  What is going on beautiful people Welcome to another
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  episode of the narcissist Code. I'm your favorite self aware
• 0:05
  narcissist Mr. Lee Hammock better known as mental illness
• 0:08
  across all social media platforms.
• 0:10
  This is the first time I see in my face or hear my voice.
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  I'm a clinically diagnosed narcissist and I use my platform
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  on social media to raise awareness for NPD.
• 0:18
  Get more people into therapy like myself six years strong and
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  also validate the victims, survivors and thrivers of said
• 0:25
  disorder. Said toxic people said toxic
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  traits. Today's episode, it's going to
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  be about how some narcissists don't love you, they're just
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  obsessed with you. Yeah narcissists love
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  narcissists and love they. But Lee, you can stop the video
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  right there because narcissists don't love you and narcissists
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  can't love and they. I get it.
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  Y'all definitely understand it but here we are.
• 0:47
  So before we hop into today's episode, y'all make sure if you
• 0:49
  haven't already, check out my self love journal on Amazon.
• 0:52
  Lee Hammock I love me. A self love journal helps you
• 0:55
  rebuild that self love and authenticity after they're a
• 0:59
  toxic relationship. Y'all this is what it looks like
• 1:02
  if you're on YouTube. Self love journal.
• 1:04
  Check it out. If you already got the journal.
• 1:05
  Hit me. Hit me five stars on the thing
• 1:08
  if you don't mind. If you don't mind.
• 1:09
  On Amazon. Thank you so much.
• 1:10
  Truly appreciate the support. But yeah, y'all.
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  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Some narcissists do not love
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  you. They are just obsessed with you.
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  So many people ask me that question.
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  Do narcissists love you? Can they ever truly love you?
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  Do. Is it ever real?
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  Is ever authentic? Y'all.
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  I always ask people, I know people will just always say, why
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  do you answer that question with the question?
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  Because I can't speak for everybody.
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  So I ask people, how is that narcissistic person treating
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  you? Are they treating you like they
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  love you? Are they treating like, put
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  yourself in their shoes Right here, switch to switch to the
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  positions up real quick. If you were treating someone
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  else the way that your partner is treating you, your parent is
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  treating you. Whatever role they play is
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  treating you. Would you think that you love
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  that person? Would you say, I love this
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  person If you were getting treated, that you were treating
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  somebody else the exact same way that you are being treated,
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  would you say, hey, look, I love this person?
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  No, you would. You probably wouldn't.
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  They probably would be a question like no, leave my
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  behaviors. Show that I love this person,
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  you said I'm saying the behaviors continue a lot about
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  the situation. The behaviors continue a lot
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  about what's going on. Focus on the behaviors, not the
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  words. A narcissist, the damn near
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  narcissist. The person will tell you that
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  they love you. They'll absolutely just say,
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  hey, look, I love you. I care about you.
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  You may I I I do this I love, I love, I love.
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  They'll say I love you. They'll do.
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  They'll buy you gifts and things like that.
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  But like, yeah, that is not love.
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  Giving you a gift is not does not mean to like, give.
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  If they get, they'll give you flowers.
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  After they cheat on you, they'll put their hands on you and then
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  try to hug you. That's not love.
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  Y'all that's not love. Love is love is actions, not
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  just gift giving. Love is an emotional connection.
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  Do you see what I'm saying? You see what I'm saying?
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  That's how it goes in these spaces.
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  Like ask yourself, are you being treated like you are loved?
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  Don't hold out hope like this person is going to love me like
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  they used to. Love bombing.
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  Y'all. Think about it.
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  Love bombing. When a bomb blows up, can you
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  put a bomb back together that has blown up?
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  I've never heard of that happening before.
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  Just think about it. If you've been love bombed and a
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  bomb explodes, you can't put that bomb back together.
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  You can try, but it will never be perfect again.
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  The the love. The bomb.
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  The same that bomb. That bomb of love.
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  Once it explodes, it cannot be put together again.
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  You see what I'm saying? Yeah, you just can't.
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  Once that love bomb explodes, that love bomb explodes.
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  I'm doing a video on that one. Y'all love bomb explodes.
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  You can't put it back together again.
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  So think about it. You like, they don't like if
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  they're they don't treat you like they love you all.
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  Once they stop treating you like they love you, they start
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  treating you like they they you belong to them like you are.
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  They are obsessed with you like they will cheat on you, leave
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  you for they will cheat on you, leave you for another person.
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  And they refuse to them. They refuse to let you move on
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  to somebody else. I watched a video the other day.
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  Rob this guy. Literally.
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  Yes, women can be narcissist as well.
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  Yeah, we know that. But this guy cheated on his
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  partner, right? Broke up with her, left her for
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  somebody else, then decided to just randomly pop up at pop up
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  at his ex's apartment months later.
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  A couple weeks later and she had her friends and she had some
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  dudes over there and he lost his damn mind.
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  He said no, babe, come on and talk to me.
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  Come on and talk to me. They're like, dude, you cheated
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  on her. You left her for somebody else.
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  Like, what the hell are you doing here?
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  No, she know what it is. She know what it is.
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  We always got each other's back. We always there for.
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  That's not love. Y'all that's obsession.
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  They're treating you like they're obsessed with you.
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  They're treating you like they don't want to see you with
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  anybody else. They not treating you like they
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  love you. They're doing just enough to
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  keep you there. They're doing periodic checkins
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  in your life to keep you there. They're breadcrumbing you.
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  They're giving you intermittent reinforcement to keep you there,
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  to keep you happy. They lose.
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  They do little things to keep you happy, but not to keep you
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  overall happy, not to keep you content.
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  They do little things like they'll treat you horribly.
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  They'll go through a period of time, but they're doing horrible
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  things to you. They're hurting you.
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  They're harming you. They're emotionally abusing you.
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  They're manipulating you. They're lying to you.
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  Whatever it is they're doing to you, they do that for an
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  extended period of time. And then they give you a little
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  bit of love here and there. They'll do something nice to
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  you. They do.
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  Narcissistic robot recently. Yeah.
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  Power back up. They do something nice for you,
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  right? They'll do something nice for
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  you. They'll do something like
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  they'll do that type of stuff for you and that keeps you
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  confused. Y'all that type of stuff
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  confuses you. The the same I said healing and
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  harm come from the same hand, The same hand that they use to
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  push you on the ground. They they they hold out to help
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  pick you back up. The same person that is hurting
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  you is the same person that's healing you.
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  So they are just obsessed with you.
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  Y'all you know, they they really are obsessed with you.
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  They stalk you and things like that.
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  You know what I mean? And this how it goes right
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  there. They'll stalk you.
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  They'll they'll pop up on you. They'll pop up on your job.
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  They'll pop up about your work and things like this.
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  They they don't want to let you go.
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  They they don't want to see you happy with anybody else, even
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  though they don't want to. They don't want to treat you
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  better. They just don't want to see you
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  happy with anybody else. Like I said, they'll they'll
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  they just won't leave you alone. They'll blow your phone up all
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  the time. Like blowing your phone up all
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  the time does not mean that they love you.
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  Y'all, they're just obsessed with you, you know what I'm
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  saying? Blowing your phone up, stalking,
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  following you online, peeking at your social media even though
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  y'all being broken up, even though y'all separate, even
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  though you're not. You're not interested in them
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  anymore. You're peeking at your social
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  media, like operating like, say in your stories, Liking, liking
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  things. You mean liking your friends
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  stuff, watching your friends stories and things like that.
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  It's commenting on your friends and family members.
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  Stuff that's obsession. Y'all, that's not love.
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  I know some people think they they they like, oh, I still
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  matter to this person because they're still watching over me.
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  They're still doing this type of stuff.
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  You know, I've heard, I've heard of people, I've heard of the
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  narcissistic person playing like a victim and hiring a private
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  investigator to to stop the victim.
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  Like the person is broken up with them and they've moved on.
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  They're living a good life and don't have anything to do with
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  them and a person stalks and with a private investigator yeah
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  people have are losing their mind.
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  I know, I know what you're going to say.
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  Y'all. Just because you're high private
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  investigator does not mean that you are a stalker.
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  If you are still with this person or you still have some
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  kind of financial obligation or some kind of you having kids to
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  this person and this person is lying to you, manipulating you,
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  being abusive whatever and cheating or whatever.
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  Yeah, it makes sense to hi private investigate if you can't
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  figure it out. But if you're just doing it just
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  for the the sake of watching this person, this stalking
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  anyway, they they they really just become obsessed with you.
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  Y'all they do anything but treat you well.
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  They'll they'll make, they'll they'll make close.
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  They'll become friends with your friends.
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  They'll become friends with your family members that they claim
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  they never liked. They'll do things like this to
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  show you to to remain relevant in your life.
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  They do things to remain relevant in your life as opposed
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  to treating you better. You mean they'll beg you to
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  stay? They'll do all kind of stuff
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  like that, but they'll just refuse to leave you be.
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  That's obsession. Y'all that is not love.
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  You know? Like I said, if you try to move
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  on to a new relationship or you are not even moving on to a new
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  relationship, like you post something online where you're
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  happy and smiling, they might be jealous of your life.
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  They might be jealous of somebody else coming in there
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  swooping in and trying to make you happy.
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  So that makes them just lose some of them.
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  Some of them will absolutely lose their damn minds because
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  you're out here trying to be happy, because you're trying to
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  live an authentic life, because you're trying to live a life of
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  authenticity and happiness. They don't like that type of
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  stuff. Y'all they're jealousy.
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  They're stuff. You know, I'm just telling you,
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  if they they're do they do something like this?
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  Y'all you know, if you feel like that, this person will not leave
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  you alone with anything for anything.
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  That's just an obsession. Y'all they refuse to leave you
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  alone. If you set boundaries, if you,
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  if you have filed A restraining order, if you do stuff like
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  this. Y'all.
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  If you thought about getting restraining order on somebody,
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  that's not because you think they love you.
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  That's because you think they're assessed with you or they're
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  dangerous as hell. You know what I'm saying?
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  Love. Love should not be dangerous.
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  Love shouldn't be scary. None of that stuff, y'all.
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  But it's easy to. It's easy to conflate it and for
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  the situation to go like that though, you know, I mean, that's
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  how it goes. Like some of them do not love
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  you. Y'all They're just obsessed with
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  you. Obsession.
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  And love can look alike, you know what I mean?
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  But they are not alike. They look alike.
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  Y'all they're obsession And love they're not even fraternal
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  twins. Obsession and love got
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  different. Like obsession is adopt, is
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  adopted. You see what I'm saying?
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  It's adopted. And it looks like, you know, it
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  just happens to look be the same.
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  It was this had the same religion or something like that.
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  And this is not in any way trying to pick it.
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  Adopt people have been adopted. You know, there's a bad,
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  probably a bad analogy, but it's just that it's not like a
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  personal adoption. It's like it's like an adopted.
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  Like if you like, let's look at this, use the animal Kingdom.
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  It's like a a duck that adopts a fox.
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  You see what I'm saying? It's a whole different,
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  different species. He's a you see man in a fox
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  swimming in the lake with ducks because he thinks he's a duck.
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  You see what I'm saying? But this is the space out.
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  Some of them do not love you. They think they love you.
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  They'll tell you that they love you, but they do everything
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  else. They they they just do things to
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  show you that they're obsessed with you.
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  Love is an emotional connection. Y'all it's emotional connection.
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  It's emotional actions. It's not obsessive text
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  messaging, calling, worried about you, stalking you, trying
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  to control your actions, trying to control where you're going.
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  That's not love. Y'all they are.
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  They have. There's a difference between
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  sharing locations. It's okay to share your location
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  with somebody. Y'all they're not okay to make
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  to make you FaceTime or somebody to make you FaceTime.
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  The whole time you were at a certain location, in a certain
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  spot, you know that's not okay, That's obsession.
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  That's stalkery. That's creepy.
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  If you feel creeped out, yeah, it's not love you may be with
• 11:02
  y'all. Thank you for tuning into
• 11:03
  another episode. Y'all.
• 11:04
  I truly appreciate y'all being here.
• 11:07
  The first episode of my series waving the Red Flag.
• 11:10
  The live show is coming up this Thursday at the Thursday, August
• 11:14
  31st at 9:00 PM Eastern Standard Time.
• 11:16
  Make sure you tune into the show.
• 11:18
  This first episode is about red flag.
• 11:20
  So if you want to send me your red flag story, send it to
• 11:24
  wavingtheredflagshow@gmail.com. That's waving the red flag,
• 11:29
  show@gmail.com. If you want to send me your
• 11:32
  story, you can send that in. Or if you want to send me a
• 11:35
  video, you can send the video on Instagram or to my e-mail asking
• 11:39
  me if this is if this is a red flag.
• 11:41
  If you like, have an idea like, hey, is this a red flag?
• 11:44
  Send it to me in the video. So hey Lee, whatever you just
• 11:49
  say, ask you a question about if this If you think this is a red
• 11:52
  flag of a toxic narcissistic person, you can send a video in
• 11:55
  a voice note or whatever. Or you can send it on Instagram
• 11:58
  mental illness as well. Just say make sure you put red
• 12:01
  flag show. Thanks y'all.
• 12:02
  Mental illness is out peace. Thank you so much for making it
• 12:06
  to the end of my video. Y'all I'm I am truly, eternally
• 12:09
  grateful for every single one of y'all that support the channel
• 12:12
  in any way, shape or form. If you have it already, make
• 12:15
  sure you that you subscribe to the channel so that we can reach
• 12:17
  more people. To help more people.
• 12:19
  The Selflove brand is available. I'm strong, I love me.
• 12:23
  It's a Selflove brand. The Selflove Journal is
• 12:26
  available on Amazon as well to help you rebuild their selflove
• 12:29
  and identity. You know doing the touch
• 12:30
  relationship. Also look into joining the
• 12:32
  channel membership to get more about behind the scenes perks
• 12:35
  and things like that. Y'all, thank you so much for
• 12:37
  your support. Thank you.
• 12:39
  Thank you, Thank you, thanks.