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I Would Like to Rock-n-Roll 'til 10... · Armstrong & Getty One More Thing

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I would like to rock and roll until 10 and
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: party on Friday afternoon.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: It's one more thing. Armstrong and Getty. One more thing. Oh,
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: my God.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: A reference to the great heavy rock band Kiss coming up.
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: Stay with us.
• 0:19
  Speaker 3: That reminds me of the Nate Bargatze bit about going
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: out and how it changes throughout your ages and your 20s.
• 0:25
  Speaker 3: People say, hey, you want to go? It doesn't matter
• 0:28
  Speaker 3: what they say. Yeah, I'm up.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: I'm in.
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: Where are we going? What are we doing?
• 0:32
  Speaker 3: Just automatically. And then your 30s, it's okay. Can I
• 0:38
  Speaker 3: drive separately? And then in your 40s, it's just.
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: I'm not going anywhere. Forget it. I'm not interested.
• 0:46
  Speaker 4: I just had this conversation in my 20s.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: We used to.
• 0:49
  Speaker 4: Say, okay, I'll meet you at the bar at 9.30,
• 0:53
  Speaker 4: 10 o'clock. Now, you will not see me out at 9.30.
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: Not a chance. Yeah, you're into the, can we drive
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: separately stage. Soon you'll be to the, there's no offer
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: you're going to make that is going to get me
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: to leave my home.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: I'm going to use the fictional name of Oakton, but
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: we refer to our neighborhood. We refer to 10 o'clock
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: at night as Oakton Midnight. It's just there's no reason
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: to be out past then. We're respectable folks and old. So, Michael,
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: correct me if I'm wrong. Did we hear joke number one? Oh,
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry. Metal guy, I apologize. You tuned up your
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: flying V. You're there in your glitter, your boots. You're
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: ready to play the theme for cleaning out the sound fridge.
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: Cleaning out the sound fridge.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: There he is, always on time. So did we hear
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: Gutfeld number one?
• 1:44
  Speaker 4: No.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: All right, let's hear it.
• 1:47
  Speaker 6: In a speech, Kamala Harris said, never let anybody else's
• 1:50
  Speaker 6: limited ability to see your capacity to be a limitation
• 1:53
  Speaker 6: on your ambition. Then the cop said, ma'am, I just
• 1:59
  Speaker 6: asked you to walk a straight line.
• 2:00
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: Kamala's drunk.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: I like the way he goes with themes. He picks
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: a theme for a human and then just keeps hammering it.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah. I'm intrigued by number two. Does he reset
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: who Marissa Mayer is? Yeah, he mentions.
• 2:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but I chose this one because I thought this
• 2:19
  Speaker 4: was just incredibly strange.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: Not so much funny, just weird. Well, this is Marissa Mayer,
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: who is the Ilsa She-Wolf of the SS, but more
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: a lefty, woke jackass who is in charge of NPR.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: and was just the wokest piece of crap. Oh, just insufferable.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: You may recall her from various news stories. Anyway, here's
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: a joke from Greg Gutfeld.
• 2:44
  Speaker 6: Former Yahoo CEO Marissa Meyer admits to using AI to
• 2:49
  Speaker 6: come up with three things that make her daughter special.
• 2:53
  Speaker 6: Number one, she has a terrible mother.
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: Don't we have a personal, you have a personal relationship
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: with her? Didn't you offend her or something made her mad.
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: When she was with Yahoo?
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: No, that's a different lady.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: Oh, okay.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's another woman I offended.
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: It's hard to keep them all straight.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: Give us number three, Michael.
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  Speaker 6: After an apparent hijacking threat, a United Airlines flight had
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  Speaker 6: to turn around instead of landing at its final destination
• 3:24
  Speaker 6: of New Jersey. As a result, all 150 passengers want
• 3:27
  Speaker 6: to know the identity of the hijacker.
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: So they could thank him.
• 3:35
  Speaker 3: Wow.
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  Speaker 1: So I was going to throw this story in on
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: the show. It's the drunk jackass of the week. I
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: kind of feel bad for this guy. He's a 25-year-old
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: trainee welder who was flying with a buddy of his
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  Speaker 1: in a different section of the plane, and he texted him.
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: He's been drinking a fair amount. He said, I'm going
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  Speaker 1: to hijack this bitch and crash your row only. which
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: is a very very guy that's a hilarious text yeah
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  Speaker 1: yeah but anyway one of the stewardesses noticed is he
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: dozed off or passed out or whatever and she noticed
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: it on his phone and so they had to turn
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  Speaker 1: the plane around and land it.
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  Speaker 3: What you can't clearly ascertain that that's a joke because
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: it's got.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: The h word in it i don't think they empower
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  Speaker 1: the uh plane waitresses to make that decision You see
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  Speaker 1: the H word, you tell the pilot, we're getting this
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  Speaker 1: thing down.
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  Speaker 2: Oh, my God.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, I know.
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  Speaker 3: I know.
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  Speaker 1: It's just terrible. It's ridiculous.
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  Speaker 3: All right.
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: That's probably enough of that. Here's what I wanted to do, Michael.
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  Speaker 1: Let's skip to this news report.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: I'm going to crash this plane in your row only.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: That's pretty funny.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: This is number 22 is Tony DeCoppo on CBS.
• 4:52
  Speaker 7: With Halloween this weekend, lots of people are putting costumes
• 4:55
  Speaker 7: into their carry-ons, but the rules still apply, and that
• 4:57
  Speaker 7: apparently needs saying. After TSA officers in Seattle found this,
• 5:02
  Speaker 7: described as a mix between Wolverine-style claws and Freddy Krueger blades,
• 5:07
  Speaker 7: asked if he had anything sharp, the passenger initially said
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  Speaker 7: he wasn't sure.
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  Speaker 1: So he had the bladey hands.
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  Speaker 3: Every year, they got to do the things you can
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: take through TSA and can't for this Halloween. For those
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: of you who dress up on flights or take your
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  Speaker 3: costumes with you somewhere.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: And it doesn't occur to you that Blady Hands is
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  Speaker 1: going to get some attention.
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  Speaker 2: Might get flagged.
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  Speaker 3: Do you have something sharp? Doesn't include him either.
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: So there you go. Oh, there it is.
• 5:38
  Speaker 5: Wow.
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: Play on words. Whoa, zingo.
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: Got him.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: Bop. Katie had to ask us off the air.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: Yesterday, what boffo meant.
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: It means what it says, boffo. It's a fun word.
• 5:57
  Speaker 4: It is.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: Speaking of hairy comic book characters, ladies and gentlemen, I
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: give you Gene Simmons of the legendary rock band Kiss.
• 6:05
  Speaker 3: After 45 years together, legendary rockers KISS say they are
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  Speaker 3: about to embark on their farewell tour.
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  Speaker 2: You wanted the best! You got the best! The hottest
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  Speaker 2: band in the world!
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  Speaker 5: Yeah!
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  Speaker 7: This is really the end because it's got to be
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  Speaker 7: the end.
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: There are plenty of bands out there that have stayed
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: on stage too long. That's not going to happen to us.
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  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 6:36
  Speaker 3: You might be saying that because you are a certain
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: level of dignified and you're not going to go out
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: there and do that sort of thing to small crowds
• 6:42
  Speaker 3: or ticket sales are in such that there's no point
• 6:46
  Speaker 3: in trying to tour anymore.
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: Could be.
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: And so you're going to flog the farewell tour thing.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: He's one of the most brilliant businessmen in the history
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  Speaker 1: of show business. Nothing but respect for Gene. You know what?
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: I regret this. And this may surprise you, but as
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: a teenager with strong musical opinions... The stuff I didn't like,
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: I really didn't like. And I would never have been
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: caught at a KISS concert. I was a heavy rock fan,
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: but I thought KISS was ridiculous.
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: My friends were so into KISS. Ronnie Wiederhold, if you're listening.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: I had a boyhood chum who was also into KISS,
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  Speaker 1: and I just thought it was ridiculous. And hearing that
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: introduction by the hype man and then them blasting into
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  Speaker 1: song number one, how did I not go see KISS?
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: How did I not go see it just for the spectacle?
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: Just because it is something of my time on Earth
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  Speaker 1: that will endure. Was it ridiculous?
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: Of course it was. But it was something. It was notable.
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  Speaker 3: They put on a hell of a show. I'm sure
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  Speaker 3: they do.
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  Speaker 2: Of course, yeah.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: Look, it wasn't to my taste, but it's like I
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: say about Metallica. I'm so glad I saw them. I
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: don't love their music, but their craft is unbelievable. Their playing,
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: their compositions are unreal. And I'm glad I saw it,
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: and I wish I'd seen Kiss.
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: Two Kiss-related stories.
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  Speaker 1: Before they were 80.
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  Speaker 2: One involving me. Yes.
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  Speaker 3: First one, one of the Christmas... episodes of Family Guy
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: that includes Kiss Saves Christmas is so funny.
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  Speaker 2: Hilarious. I don't think I know that one. Oh my God. Oh,
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  Speaker 2: it's a good one.
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  Speaker 3: It's where Stewie is going to be baby Jesus in
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  Speaker 3: the play, but kind of a side story is the
• 8:37
  Speaker 3: TV show Kiss Saves Christmas, which is so funny. We
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  Speaker 3: watch the Stewie Baby Jesus every year because it's flipping hilarious. Anyway,
• 8:47
  Speaker 3: different KISS story. I'm in Salina, Kansas, where Donald Trump
• 8:51
  Speaker 3: is speaking on Saturday. And everybody I know there is
• 8:54
  Speaker 3: going nuts because it's such a big deal. Tiny town
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  Speaker 3: in Kansas. But I'm working at 99KG, the radio station.
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: KISS comes to town, plays a concert. The electricity goes
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  Speaker 3: out at the concert venue forever. right as they start
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  Speaker 3: into the first couple of piano notes of the encore Beth,
• 9:11
  Speaker 3: which everybody was waiting for the.
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  Speaker 2: Whole, Beth, I hear you calling. The crowd goes wild.
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  Speaker 2: People are crying. They rock hard, but they're sensitive.
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  Speaker 3: The electricity went out and everybody went nuts and they
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  Speaker 3: had to end the show right there.
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  Speaker 2: And so I had to go to the radio station,
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  Speaker 2: and I don't know which one. I don't know if
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: it might have been Gene Simmons. I don't know.
• 9:28
  Speaker 3: One of the Big Kiss stars called into the radio
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  Speaker 3: station to apologize to everybody who was there and saying,
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: we'll come back through town another time and everything, because.
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: Everybody was so upset.
• 9:39
  Speaker 3: People were hanging around at the arena, hoping the electricity.
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: Would come back on. Oh, that's so coitus interruptus.
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: Did you go home to Beth? Did you write the song?
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: I need to know. Oh, my God.
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: Did she understand?
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: Did she hear your plays? I think it was Gene Simmons.
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: It was either him or whoever the lead singer dude is.
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
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  Speaker 1: That would be Paul Stanley.
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: I'll take your word for it. But they had to
• 10:03
  Speaker 3: call into the radio station. I had to go in
• 10:05
  Speaker 3: at night because this is a major crisis we have
• 10:07
  Speaker 3: in this small town.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: The Kiss concert, the electricity went off. Oh, my God.
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's beautiful.
• 10:14
  Speaker 8: Beautiful.
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: Oh, let's see. Speaking of scary things, this is all
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: so genius, the way we put it together, and Halloween,
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: et cetera. Jerry Seinfeld.
• 10:24
  Speaker 5: Remember those last few Halloweens? Getting a little too old
• 10:26
  Speaker 5: for it. Just kind of going through the motions. Bing bong,
• 10:31
  Speaker 5: come on, lady, let's go. Halloween, doorbells, candy, let's pick
• 10:36
  Speaker 5: up the pace. You come to the door, they always
• 10:39
  Speaker 5: ask you those same stupid questions. What are you supposed
• 10:42
  Speaker 5: to be? I'm supposed to be done by now. You
• 10:44
  Speaker 5: want to move it along, the three musketeers? I got
• 10:50
  Speaker 5: 18 houses on this block alone. You just hit the bag,
• 10:53
  Speaker 5: we hit the road.
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  Speaker 8: That's the routine.
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: Let's just pick it up.
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  Speaker 5: Sometimes they give you that little white bag twisted on
• 11:00
  Speaker 5: the top. You know that's going to be some crap candy.
• 11:05
  Speaker 5: It's got to have those official Halloween markings on it.
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: Hold it, lady.
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: Wait a second.
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  Speaker 2: What is this?
• 11:10
  Speaker 5: The orange marshmallow shaped like a big peanut? Do me
• 11:12
  Speaker 5: a favor. You keep that one.
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: Do me a favor. You keep that one.
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: I remember when my kids were younger in the one house,
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  Speaker 3: she gave out full-size candy bars.
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God.
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: They talked about that for years. We got to go
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: back to that one house where they give out the
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: full-size candy bars.
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. It's the dream come true.
• 11:33
  Speaker 5: All right.
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: Speaking of circus peanuts and orange things, here is Sean Farage.
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: The great Trump imitator. Well, I think it kind of
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: explains itself.
• 11:43
  Speaker 8: I like big butts and I cannot lie. You are
• 11:46
  Speaker 8: the brothers, fake news, phonies, losers and stupid people can't deny.
• 11:51
  Speaker 8: When a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist,
• 11:53
  Speaker 8: it's so small and a round thing. They call it
• 11:56
  Speaker 8: a round thing. I call it a big, beautiful butt
• 11:59
  Speaker 8: in your face. They say, sir, you get sprung, sir.
• 12:03
  Speaker 8: unless you're James Talifrico. I don't think he likes big butts.
• 12:06
  Speaker 8: I think he likes something else, but I don't think
• 12:08
  Speaker 8: he likes big butts. You look at him, he's into
• 12:10
  Speaker 8: other things, but.
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: I love big butts.
• 12:13
  Speaker 8: Nobody loves big butts more than I do, but I
• 12:17
  Speaker 8: just have to tell you that not all big butts
• 12:19
  Speaker 8: are created equal. You look at Jiggly Belly Pritzker, now
• 12:23
  Speaker 8: we call him Jiggly Booty Pritzker, right? Jiggly Belly Pritzker,
• 12:27
  Speaker 8: Rosie O'Donnell, Stacey Abrams, we call her the beast of
• 12:30
  Speaker 8: the Southeast. Sloppy Chris Christie. They all have big butts too.
• 12:35
  Speaker 8: But we call that a loose caboose, right? It's a
• 12:38
  Speaker 8: loose caboose.
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: It's not nice.
• 12:39
  Speaker 8: It's a loose caboose. I call them a gas giant.
• 12:42
  Speaker 8: They're gas giants. And so we don't like their big butts.
• 12:45
  Speaker 8: There are some people who do. Califrico maybe, but we
• 12:49
  Speaker 8: don't like their big butts. But we overall are a
• 12:52
  Speaker 8: very big fan of a big, beautiful butt. And so
• 12:57
  Speaker 8: we hope you are, too, because if you're not a
• 12:58
  Speaker 8: fan of a big butt, you might be a stupid person.
• 13:01
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 13:02
  Speaker 8: God bless you.
• 13:03
  Speaker 2: God bless America. God bless big butts.
• 13:05
  Speaker 8: And thank you for your attention.
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: To this matter.
• 13:08
  Speaker 3: That's a good impersonation.
• 13:11
  Speaker 4: Wow. You know, listening to him speak naturally, he naturally
• 13:16
  Speaker 4: sounds like Trump. oh yeah his his voice has a
• 13:20
  Speaker 4: very similar tone in his cadence the way that he
• 13:22
  Speaker 4: says that i mean yeah he's he already kind of
• 13:25
  Speaker 4: is halfway there.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: I haven't been watching snl this season yet i've got
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: it on the dvr i keep saying i'm going to
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: get to it but has uh james what's his uh every.
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: Show every freaking episode i fast forward to him i
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: just have no interest in the trump sketches on snl
• 13:40
  Speaker 3: anymore zero they're just so tired oh my god Let
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: me guess, you're going to portray him as a stupid racist.
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: Hey! Yeah.
• 13:50
  Speaker 3: But no, his Trump is excellent also. And so is
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: Shane Gillis. That's why Shane Gillis was originally going to
• 13:54
  Speaker 3: be on the show, because his Trump is so good.
• 13:56
  Speaker 3: He would have been the Trump guy for the Trump
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: era if he hadn't been. He had MeToo'd. I don't
• 14:03
  Speaker 3: remember what his offense was, but they found an old tweet.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah.
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: Wasn't it a George Floyd?
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: Whatever.
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: Could be.
• 14:11
  Speaker 8: Whatever.
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: Thank you, Michael. Got to put a bookend on that.
• 14:19
  Speaker 8: Thank you.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: Exactly, yeah. You know, Elvis hated Gene Simmons.
• 14:23
  Speaker 3: I will pull your goddamn tongue out by the roots!
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: I did not know that.
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: He didn't like that act, no.
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: Well, I guess that's it.