Latest / Live 100 Podcast with Jason Yarusi / The Most Dangerous Place to Be in Life

Transcript

The Most Dangerous Place to Be in Life · Live 100 Podcast with Jason Yarusi

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: Then another week passes, another year passes, another decade passes, and one day you realize, you realize that you've spent the entire last 10 years of living a life, never intentionally, just chose to live.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_01: And that's where the trap is.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_01: You have to stop waiting for a crisis to give you permission to act.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_01: You cannot change what you refuse to confront.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_01: We usually focus on the cost of change, right?
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_01: What if I fail?
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_01: What if I lose money?
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_01: What if it all falls apart?
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_01: What if people judge me?
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_01: What if this becomes uncomfortable?
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_01: But what is the cost of doing nothing?
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_01: But do not use gratitude for an excuse to be complacent.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_01: All right, let's go.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_01: If you're tired of not feeling fit, tired of just having a focus, tired of just not having the life that you deserve.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_01: This is the place to be.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_01: And today we want to talk about the most dangerous place in life that nobody warned you about.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it's it's not even rock bottom, it's not complete failure, it's not when everything is falling apart.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's when everything is just okay.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_01: Your marriage is okay, your health is okay, the business is okay, your body and your fitness is okay, you're making just enough money, you're getting through the week, and nothing hurts badly enough to force you to change.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_01: But deep down, you know all in that this is exactly the life that you don't want to have.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_01: And what makes this okay so dangerous is if your situation was miserable, you were absolutely deplorable and just everything that you had was just so bad, you would probably do something about it.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_01: If your business was collapsing, you would make that hard decision.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_01: If your health completely failed or you had that scare, right, you would make the change to your habits.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_01: If you hated every single second of your job, if your boss was miserable, if you didn't make any money, if the work conditions were horrible, you would update your resume, you would make the call, you would do what was needed to find something new.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_01: That pain, it creates the urgency.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_01: But the okay, that part of having okay is just enough comfort to say, you know, uh, I kind of guess it's not okay, but it's not enough to really make the change.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_01: It's not the dissatisfaction that you need to push you forward.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_01: So it just slowly drains the life out of you.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_01: You don't change because today wasn't terrible, right?
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_01: Then another week passes, another year passes, another decade passes, and one day you realize, you realize that you've spent the entire last 10 years living in life, never intentionally just chose to live.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_01: And that's where the trap is.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, it's comfortable enough to just tolerate.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_01: It's not meaningful enough for you to go fulfill you, not enough for you to break the pattern because it's just comfort.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_01: It's that warm blanket that you want, don't want to get away from, but it's not that life or that comfortable bed.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_01: And that isn't in tart you just say go recklessly quit your job, walk away from your marriage, or just blow up your business.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_01: That's not the okay here.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_01: It means that you have to stop waiting for a crisis to give you permission to act.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_01: So many times in life we wait for something that gets so bad.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_01: And then when it finally gets so bad, we go, okay, now I gotta take action.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_01: You know, what do I need to do to create the urgency before life creates it for you?
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_01: You have to find this in yourself.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_01: You have to start telling yourself the absolute truth.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_01: What part of you and your life have you been calling okay, right?
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_01: What is it?
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_01: What is your admitting to that you honestly hate, but you've just been dealing with?
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_01: It's like having a splinter in your side or in your finger that you're just walking around with all day.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_01: It's like not bad enough.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_01: So you don't deal with it and you're just letting it go.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, maybe your health is okay, but you avoid the mirror because you kind of just feel tired every day.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_01: So you're saying, oh, you know what?
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_01: I just won't do the workout.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe your marriage is suffering, but you and your spouse, you've become two people that are just living in the same house but are not actually going to live and build a life together.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe your business is okay, but honestly, it's really something that can't get too bad because, well, you can't spend too much time with your family because you're so busy at work.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_01: And you only get to be with them when you have time left because your business is just okay.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe your income is okay because, but you have no freedom, no margin, no excitement, nothing you can do.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_01: And if you have one thing that that would happen right, then it would create some urgency, but it just hasn't happened yet.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_01: Your car isn't broken down, you haven't had that medical bill that's come in, that's hit it.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_01: You name it.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_01: You cannot change what you refuse to confront.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_01: It's like getting a bunch of bills in the mail and instead of opening them up, you like put them in a drawer, like hoping they get resolved.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_01: Second, you have to calculate the cost of staying the same.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_01: You staying the same right now, what is that cost?
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_01: We usually focus on the cost of change, right?
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: What if I fail?
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_01: What if I lose money?
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_01: What if it all falls apart?
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_01: What if people judge me?
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_01: What if this becomes uncomfortable?
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_01: But what is the cost of doing nothing?
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_01: That's what you have to ask yourself.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_01: Can you look back after another decade and say to yourself, well, you know what?
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_01: I just was comfortable enough so I didn't stay.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_01: What will your marriage feel like?
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_01: What will your children remember about you and their relationships?
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_01: What will you become if you keep repeating that exact life?
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_01: If you keep doing exactly the same thing today and tomorrow, you already know the results.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_01: So change, of course, it has a price, but sort of staying uh stuck into exactly the life where you are.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_01: And saying stuff often becomes far more expensive because you pay for it slowly.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_01: You don't think it's expensive because overall, each and every day, we don't see the cost of actually doing nothing, but it's one compromise day at a time.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_01: Third is you have to choose to move right now.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_01: You know, you don't need to redesign your entire life.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_01: It's not that.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_01: You need to take one honest action today that proves you're no longer accepting okay.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_01: You schedule the appointment right and you keep it.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_01: You say you're gonna go to the gym and you show up.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_01: You fire that wrong client, you delegate the task that you keep doing because it's you think it's cheaper to do it, right?
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_01: But it's making you feel trapped.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_01: Or you go out and apply for that position.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_01: You you block out the first hour to build your business or build your life.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_01: You have to take that one step and create the commitment today to yourself to create the momentum.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_01: Finally, you give yourself a deadline.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_01: Someday protects you.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_01: That word is just like, okay, well, someday, someday, there's no someday out there.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_01: Someday is a day that never comes.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: You put a date in the calendar and say, by today, by Friday, by next week, I will make the call.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_01: By the next 30, 30 days, I will train three days a week.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_01: Tonight, I will have an honest conversation with my spouse.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_01: Before the quarter ends, I remove myself from that one role that no longer really requires me, but I was stuck into it because I felt like I had to do it.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: You don't need to wait till you're miserable.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_01: You don't need to wait till you're rock bottom.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_01: You don't need to wait until the business collapses or your marriage collapses or your body falls apart.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_01: You need to decide, to decide right now that you deserve something better than you have.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_01: Be grateful for what you have.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_01: That's not missing on this conversation.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_01: But do not use gratitude for an excuse to be complacent.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_01: You can appreciate your life and still admit that honestly, something needs to change.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_01: The most dangerous life is always obviously the worst one.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_01: Sometimes the life that looks good enough from the outside feels empty on the inside because you're not continuing to push the ball forward to see what you're really meant for and what you really have in you.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_01: Wouldn't it be great to look back on a life that was well lived?
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_01: And if pain isn't forcing the change, then you have to find the purpose to do so.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_01: You identify this part of your life that you have settled over.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_01: Count it down.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_01: Go after it today.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_01: Four, three, two, one, go.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_01: Let's do this.