Latest / The Immutable Word / EP064 15 Principles of Stewardship That Will Change Your Finances - Part 1

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EP064 15 Principles of Stewardship That Will Change Your Finances - Part 1 · The Immutable Word

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Hey, welcome to The Immutable Word. We're back for a new episode.
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We're going to be covering a,
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rather deep topic, but before we go there, we had just wrapped up the Baptist
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Distinctive series, so if you haven't caught any of those, which I'm sure you've
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probably caught some of them, that's all we've been doing for the last five,
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six, seven, eight weeks,
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we would like to hear from you if you have any comments about anything in those series.
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We did cover a lot, so be sure to check it out. Today we're going to be talking
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about something a little bit different, so we're shifting. Before we do,
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Robert, how are you doing, man?
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Pretty good, pretty good. What's going on, man?
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There's always a lot going on, I think, in both our lives, right?
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Did you hear about the SBC?
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The phone company? No, the Southern Baptist Church Convention. No, what about it?
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They finally banned women as pastors.
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They officially voted on it, thousands of members. By thousands of members?
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Yeah, thousands of members of the Southern Baptist Convention officially voted
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to ban women from being preachers.
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I would say that's pretty unexpected. I mean, it's one of the few times that,
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you know, we would agree with what the Southern Baptist Convention was doing.
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Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You'd think it'd be the other way around,
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the way things were going, right?
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Yeah, I mean, well, they ordained and had considered it, and even,
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I think there were some churches, Southern Baptist churches, that did ordain women.
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So, but there's a lot of heat around it and a lot of, you know,
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evangelicals and liberal churches and stuff that are up in arms, especially,
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you know, considering this month is the LGBTQA whatever month. Yeah, perfect timing.
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So there's a lot of debate around it. And, you know, the assumption is,
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and I think it's just a derivative of the Marxist culture.
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You know, especially feminism, that, you know, that you're attacking women when
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you say they can't be pastors.
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So, it's a shift of authority. You know, they assume that the culture defines the standard.
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And of course, the Southern Baptist Convention basically just,
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you know, lined up with the Word of God is what it comes down to.
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You know, we say Southern Baptist, I just, I want some of our listeners to understand
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we're not Southern Baptist, we're independent, King James Bible, even Baptist.
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Very different, you know, set of Baptists, different convictions,
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you know, when we go back to those Baptist principles, you know,
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our first assumption is that the Word of God is the absolute final perfect authority.
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So, guess what? That's going to determine whether or not who can be a pastor
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or a bishop or a deacon in the church. So, yeah.
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Yeah, the Southern Baptist Convention always had perspective that they were
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a pretty liberal, very liberal institution. And yeah, and they are, I mean, in some ways.
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Surprisingly enough, I don't know if many people know this, but the Southern
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Baptist Convention has probably been the most responsible group for pushing Calvinism.
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Some of the most Calvinistic colleges in the country is rooted in the Southern Baptist Convention.
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Wow. So, a lot of their theology. Anyway, so there's a lot of problems wrong
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with the Southern Baptist Convention, but, you know, them voting and making
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a determination that women can't be pastors is the right determination, you know?
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But I would encourage our listeners, if you haven't already,
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the Unmovable Apologetics with Randy Keener and Caleb Hickam,
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they just released an episode on that today.
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So I would definitely go back, listen to it.
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And he also based it on an article he wrote in Watchman's Warning.
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So go over there to Watchman's Warning, read the article, and listen to the
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podcast if you get a chance.
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He's starting out with the plugs.
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You do contribute to the articles, so that's another reminder.
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I'm going to plug in that you do contribute maybe one or two a week or so to
3:51
some of their articles. So definitely check it out.
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And of course you know check out our our sub stack as well so you put out a
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couple things a week but yeah interesting news what else what else is going on.
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Well i mean we we've been talking about this and we've talked about this often
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on on this podcast we've touched on a little bit but you know got to thinking
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about it just recently so,
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You know, my second youngest daughter got married, you know, a couple months ago.
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And my second oldest is married. Son got married.
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And then the oldest also got married. So I have one left. I have the youngest
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left. And so thinking about that, I know you and I have talked about finances
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quite a bit. We've had our own struggles financially and, you know, individually.
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And you know i think this year is man let's see 26 30 it'll be 31 years that
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you know my wife and i've been married so.
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That's a long time now with that being the case you know it you know the it
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wasn't we didn't always do the right things financially so i've you know we i've had to learn,
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in manually you know through a lot of self-study books podcasts other things
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to kind of figure out how to get my feet back on the ground financially.
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And of course, it's caused a lot of problems in our marriage.
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And the Lord was gracious and merciful.
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And I think he opened up the door, gave us a lot of resources to kind of get
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a lot of that stuff under control. So I just thought it'd be interesting because,
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there's a book, there's a preacher that comes to our church every now and then,
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R.B. Ullett. So some people may know him.
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He's had a large church up in Detroit, Michigan for many, many years.
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And I think he's like pastor emeritus now.
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So he kind of is a traveling evangelist, but he's written a lot of practical
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books, you know, principle-led books.
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And he wrote a book called Under Pressure, and the subtitle is Overcoming Seasons
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of Stress with Biblical Wisdom. So one of the sections he covered was on finances.
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And he has a list of what he calls 15 principles of stewardship.
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Now, stewardship just means that you are a manager of a household, okay?
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And in this particular case, the principles he outlines are financial.
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And, you know, I wanted you and I to kind of just talk through some of these principles.
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I mean, we may cover all 15. We may just cover, you know, we'll just go through
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some of them. But I know you've had your own journey financially,
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Alan. And so, you know, I guess, you know, what have you experienced?
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Yeah, going back many years now, it's been a long journey. In fact,
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you're a big influence on me back in the day. So I learned a little bit from
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you as you started your journey in the financial world.
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And we weren't taught any of this. Like this stuff isn't taught in school.
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The big difference between what we have available today is like the information,
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is just at the tip of our fingertips. We can just type in finances and YouTube,
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you're going to get like a hundred different channels and people talking about finances.
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And the reality of it is that we don't, it's hard not to know or have knowledge
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of the wisdom of managing money today.
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It was harder then. And, you know, our parents weren't the greatest at it either.
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So we just, We did what we knew, and we thought getting in debt was something
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normal and something that everybody did, having car payments and things like
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that, and just living above your means and spending your money.
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Savings and investments were
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just knew nothing about until we started looking into it back in the day.
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But when I got married, which was about 25 years ago, it will be 25 years in
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February, it was a struggle for the first five years because we didn't have
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that knowledge or that wisdom that was imparted to us.
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And I know we're going to cover it here, but the funny thing is,
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maybe it's not that funny, but this information, all the wisdom is in the Bible,
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that practical money principles is all there.
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And if you paid attention you
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live by those principles you'd be in a much better state and a lot of what,
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a lot of what you see out there in all these financial books like everybody
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knows about dave ramsey right i mean that was probably the first influence you
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had you turned me on to dave ramsey dave ramsey back in the day,
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listening to the radio shows and learning about the the baby steps,
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which I think is, I would recommend that to, to anybody.
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If you're trying to figure out where you're at financially and maybe you're
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trying to, to learn or turn things around because maybe you got yourself into a little bit of trouble.
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That would be the number one thing I'd recommend is like, hey,
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pick up Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover, follow his baby steps,
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and you'll get in a really good place really fast.
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Now, when it comes to investing, that's a whole different discussion and topic.
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And I think that's just as important because we're talking about the future,
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and being a good steward in that sense.
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But I know we're going to cover that here. But yeah, this Brother Rolette's
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book is a really good book. And he's got a lot of really good practical.
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Biblical principles around finances that pretty much all align.
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It's really about the wisdom. I mean, one of the things I do want to clarify,
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like, you know, this is meant to be kind of a top of our head.
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The principles are going to help guide the discussion. But I would say this
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is, you know, we're not going to get super practical.
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We might give some practical advice, but at the end of the day,
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we couldn't cover that today.
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That'd have to be another series. And this is where we're talking about specific
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things like exactly what to budget and percentage of budgeting and things like that.
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But when it comes down to any of those practical steps, I feel you can't really
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be practical unless you understand the principle.
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You know what I mean? It's like as we kind of go through it,
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you know, we talk about Dave Ramsey, like one of the famous saying,
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he says, act your wage, right?
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Yeah. Or live on less than what you make. With the layer means.
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Yeah. But, you know, we're not going to cover the how-to.
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That's when you get knee-deep and into the weeds with budgeting and percentages
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and what budgeting tools you can use and spreadsheets and whatnot.
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But I think what these principles help, at least, is kind of help.
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Establish a perspective in the mind of a believer. So there's some people here,
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you know, well, let me put this way.
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I gave a little bit of my history as far as how I got where I was,
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you know, when I went in the military, I mean, I signed up to go in my junior
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year of high school and senior year.
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I did a delayed enlistment. So I waited until after I graduated and I went in
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that August after I graduated, I think in May. So it was a few months.
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And of course, up to that point, I never really had a full-time job.
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I didn't, you know, I didn't make a regular income.
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And so for us, you know, our mom giving us $10 here, $15 there,
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20 bucks there, that was huge money, you know?
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And of course, you know, what would we do? We'd go spend it,
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you know, first thing we'd go buy candy, Cokes, you know, go to the arcade and
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we'd blow it, Right. Cause you know, we were never taught the principle of saving
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that didn't make any sense to us. You know?
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So we just knew money at some point would come in somewhere.
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And our parents were kind of like the same way as if money came in,
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you know, they might buy a new furniture or buy clothes or buy something,
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but it really wasn't, we just weren't taught to save.
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So when I went into military, I think at that time, my, my monthly salary came
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out to like 700 bucks a month.
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Now, $700 a month, okay, in 1990. 56, 60 years ago or so. Yeah,
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that's a lot of money. But in 1990, here's the thing.
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I didn't make $100. For me to make $100, that would be like,
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I could live on that for an entire year.
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So $700 was like, I'm rich, you know?
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Yeah, back in, sorry. No, I was going to say, just like the buying power back
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then, there's just a huge difference.
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20 bucks i remember going to the grocery store back in 2000 2001 for 20 bucks
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i could get like two or three bags of groceries,
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and it's just it's insane it's crazy yeah it's that's unheard of now you know and,
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but you know the thing is is because i was so undisciplined with money money
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i didn't understand what saving was i if you were to ask me about you know percentages
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and budgeting i'd had no clue what any of that meant.
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So when I got a $700 paycheck and I had no bills, I had no debt.
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As far as I was concerned, that $700 was spending money. I just needed to find
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the closest store so I could spend it all.
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And that's exactly, that was my mindset. Well, I'm going to get,
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I'm going to get this every month. Are you kidding me?
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And so that was, you know, when I got those paycheck and I was living on base,
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you know, so I was, I was living in a dorm.
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I didn't have to pay for my, I think our meals were free for the most part,
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other than when I got to my duty station you could still go to the cafeteria
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on base and to pay for breakfast lunch and dinner was less than four or five bucks a day,
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i just go to the cafeteria eat whatever i want yeah it's insane super cheap right so,
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so that meant i could buy and of course i was an idiot because they saw us come
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in most military bases the retail stores in the in the city in the community,
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start saying man, we'll give you store credit for this.
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It's store credit for that. And so, yep, sure enough, I got a JCPenney store
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credit. I got a Sears store credit. I got this and that.
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And I was like, man, yeah, I can get that stereo. And they're like,
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hey, it's only $15 a month in payments, you know?
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But of course, enough of that, next thing you know, like $600 in rent,
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I mean, I was renting a stereo, believe it or not.
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And anyway, the point is, I think people would kind of understand that there
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was just absolutely no discipline.
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There was no understanding of money. And I was saved, right?
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But nobody had ever sat down and showed me what the Bible said about money.
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Just never understood it.
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So that's why to me that's why when i started looking at these principles that,
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brother let put it in his book,
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they're so profound they're simple to me they're simple they're i mean and most
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of these statements are no more than 10 or 15 words at the most,
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and here's what's crazy is these are so profound but this can literally change
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a person's entire life i don't know alan i mean if you if you look at that at this list,
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i mean what are your thoughts yeah i'm just i was I was just looking at it as
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you were talking about it, and,
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it's so simple.
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It's kind of ridiculous.
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And just being able to have this in my hands as a 17 or 18-year-old or whenever
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you went to the military...
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And we applied it. I wonder how things would be different today.
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Hindsight's always 20-20.
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Right. But no, just looking at it, it's just absolutely simple,
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but it's hugely impactful to everybody financially. So what I want to do,
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just for time's sake, I'm going to read all 15, and then.
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We'll just go back and forth on a few of them. Yeah, yeah. We can make it a
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series if we wanted to. Just kind of play it by ear.
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So here's the 15. It's called 15 Principles of Stewardship by R.B. Ouellette.
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And again, it's from his book Under Pressure, Overcoming Seasons of Stress with Biblical Wisdom.
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So if you can get the book, I encourage you because it's not just about money.
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He's got all kinds of other practical advice and principles he covers. But this stood out.
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I teach a biblical finances class at our Bible college.
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So with that being said, let me go ahead and go through the list.
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So number one, I think obviously this is foundational.
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And think of it this way. These principles are, I need to change my entire perspective about money.
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And so the first one, I think, is the most obvious. It's number one,
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none of it is yours. It all belongs to God. I mean, profound.
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The money, it's not because you bring in a big paycheck or you make this extra
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money because you work hard.
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And God will bless that. The Bible says in all labor, there's profit.
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But the first and foremost principle, especially if you're going to try to get
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in the mindset of doing the right thing with money, is number one,
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none of it's yours. users.
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It all belongs to God. That's your car. That's your wallet. That's your,
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you know, your traditional IRA. That's your Roth.
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Those are your index funds. Those are your, you know, single stock investments.
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They are your, you know, your goods.
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Everything. It belongs to God. None of it's yours. So that's number one.
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Number two, I think this is another profound statement.
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Money is a neutral substance. It can be used for good or evil.
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Now, some people go, oh, money's evil. But that's not what the Bible says.
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The Bible says the love of money is the root of all evil, not money.
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Money could be used for good or for evil. So money is a neutral substance.
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Some people get so fearful of money that they try to get rid of it quickly,
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or they make the wrong decisions about it. So that number two,
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money is a neutral substance. It could be used for good or evil,
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is a deeply profound principle.
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This is another one. Number three, money can be invested forever,
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but listen, but spent only once.
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Isn't that interesting? I think that's, I mean, that's why I love this list.
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Money can be invested forever. That means you can continue to invest money as you make income.
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And if you do it right, you can actually make money invest in itself.
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So you're going to gain interest on investments and that interest is going to
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be reinvested into the principal or the, you know what I mean?
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The principal or the interest that you make off the principal is going to reinvest in itself.
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It can work 24 hours a day, but once you spend it, that's it.
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No more second chances. It's gone.
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So I don't know. When you think about what we'll go through here,
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let me go through the list. Number four, number four, it's, it's sinful. Watch.
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It's sinful to spend more than you have foolish to spend all you have.
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It's sinful to spend more than you have, foolish to spend all you have. Number five.
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Most financial problems can be traced to ignorance, indulgence, or irresponsibility.
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Most financial problems can be traced to ignorance, indulgence,
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or irresponsibility. Number six, God expects us to increase what he gives us.
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God expects us to increase what
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he gives us. Number seven, God is against get-rich-quick schemes. Okay?
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That's taking shortcuts to try to get money. Number eight, God is against loving
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riches. That's obvious, 1 Timothy 6.
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Number nine, God is against trusting in riches.
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Because our trust should be in the Lord, right? Number nine,
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God, I mean, number nine is God is against trusting riches. Number 10,
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God is not against riches.
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So number eight is God is against loving riches. Number nine,
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God is against trusting in riches. But number 10 is God is not against riches.
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So just because you're rich doesn't mean you're automatically sinful So we'll
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look we'll look at that passage in first timothy about that number 11,
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The more you spend when you're young The less you'll have when you're old,
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The more you spend when you're young the less you'll have when you're old number
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12 Spending should be deferred Giving should not,
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Spending should be deferred giving should not number 13 wealth and poverty both
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wealth and poverty are equally dangerous,
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okay number 14 money is not what life is about money is not what life is about
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i mean we we know some of the the most miserable people on the face of the planet are rich people so.
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Number 14, money is not what life is about. And then the fifth one,
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the 15th one, last principle is you must pay for every purchase.
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Wise people pay when they purchase.
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So you must pay for every purchase. Wise people pay when they purchase.
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So Ellen, just going through that list slowly, thinking about it, what are your thoughts?
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If I were to start with, one that stuck out was probably number 11.
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The more you spend when young, the less you have when you're old.
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And that can cover a couple different things.
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And the one you're talking about is your own experience that you're in the Air
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Force. And once you got your paycheck, you'd spend it.
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Some people would spend more than what they have. They're not living below their
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means. I am absolutely 100% guilty of that.
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I spent everything i had and i got credit cards and spent paid my bills with
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credit cards then even use the overdraft limits in my,
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in my checking account too to spend and barely make rent and things like that,
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and how are you you're you're essentially stealing from yourself later on in the future,
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you're you're stealing from your future self there's there's a youtube channel
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like watching them as a guy that's biblically minded too and he talks about
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finances all the time and when he talks about,
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good stewardship with money and saving and investing he would always say at
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the end of his channels your future self will thank your younger self or something to that effect.
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And it's pretty profound and it's deep but it's so impactful in somebody's lives
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that they can grasp that principle I'd say number 11 was the big one and then Number 15,
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you must pay for every purchase.
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Wise people pay when they purchase.
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So for example, when we see a lot of people go to the dealership,
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do you think they're paying cash for their $70,000 trucks?
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Probably, probably not. Just a down payment.
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I've heard all the justifications for it. It's like, hey, I'm going to be driving
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this thing for 10 or 15 years. Yeah, right.
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They're going to train it in five years. That's typically how it works.
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And then roll the balance over. But I've heard the justifications from people
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I really like and they're close, family. I'm not trying to diss on them.
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But I'd hear, I'm going to be driving this thing for 10 or 15 years. It's an investment.
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I need something so I can haul stuff all the time. I never haul anything.
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And, you know, just things like that. There's all these practical reasons.
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They convince themselves, you know, that they need it.
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And the problem, and like you're kind of alluding to, why do people pay when
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they purchase? Well, a fool pays in payments.
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I was trying to be nice about it, but that's essentially it.
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Yeah, because, I mean, if you can pay for it up front, you're going to be better off.
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The car is i think a perfect example i think i think people,
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retire poor because of vehicles that's probably the number one reason yeah it's
23:40
it's a huge problem i can tell you right now is the if people call it an investment,
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they call it it's something that they need it is the the biggest depreciating asset that you can own,
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fastest quickest is the fastest is a piece of junk as soon as you drive it off
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a lot yeah yeah the minute you drive off the lot what is it they say it's like
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20 percent of its value is lost and nearly 50 percent in about three to five years or so,
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and in the first two years i mean you're basically still paying the interest
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off the vehicle by the time you by the time you pay that vehicle off,
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you've paid basically the price of that vehicle is that you paid out of your
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pocket it's probably three to four times what that car is even worth.
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By the time you're done. There's so much to it, too, where the opportunity cost
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of what that money could have been used for. Could have been used for,
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yeah. And I'll save that for later.
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But when you're paying $1,000, that's the average.
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People are paying $1,000 a month. We're talking about that's rent.
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That's mortgage for a car that's depreciating. Now, I want people to stop and
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think about this for a second. Let's just say you have $1,000 car payment.
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Some of you have $500 car payments.
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Six seven hundred dollar car payments right now i want everybody to think about
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the financial situation they're in right now and imagine if all of a sudden
25:04
you got a raise at work and you started making a thousand dollars a month back in your pocket.
25:10
I mean, you could probably hear people's like sighs of relief,
25:13
like, wow, I have an extra thousand dollars in my pocket.
25:16
They don't think about that when they walk onto the car lot.
25:20
And six months into that, where you're making four, 500, $600 payments,
25:25
and then you're on top of that.
25:27
You're paying the insurance, you're putting gas in that vehicle,
25:31
you know, you're having to keep up with the maintenance, you know,
25:34
and sometimes changing oil now, Now, if you go to even Walmart,
25:38
it could be $60, $70, $80 to change oil.
25:41
That's $900 a year, people.
25:44
So anyway, so just this one example of cars, why does people pay when they purchase?
25:51
Listen, if you had to buy a junker for $25, $3,000, and all you had to do is
25:58
keep up with your maintenance, and even if you had to do $5,000 in repair for
26:02
a $3,000 car, that's $8,000.
26:05
Here's the thing if you're making a thousand dollar payments you've already
26:09
paid a twelve thousand dollars in one year,
26:13
what if you got a little junker and you were able to put and let's just say
26:18
you paid three thousand dollars for it and you were able to put what three four
26:22
five hundred dollars a month aside,
26:25
and into it even if even if it
26:27
was like a cd with four percent interest a one-year CD or a two-year CD,
26:33
and you would have, even with $500 a month, that's $6,000.
26:39
That's $6,000. Yeah.
26:41
Imagine if you had $6,000 in your pocket right now. I'm not saying you're going
26:44
to get, you know, a BMW or a Mercedes Benz. What we're saying is you're going
26:49
to get a halfway decent car that will probably last you a few years.
26:53
You know? And so I just, I think about this, you know, that,
26:56
like you said, that you must pay for every purchase and wise people pay when they purchase.
27:02
So the first part, you must pay for every purchase. Guess what?
27:05
You're going to pay for it regardless.
27:07
Right. But wise people are going to try to pay it up front now.
27:11
So one last thing, and that's the reason why it really stuck out at me is,
27:16
especially with the car payments and stuff, is the opportunity costs.
27:20
Having more money, obviously, in your pocket, finding a used car that you saved up for.
27:25
I mean, you can find really good, reliable cars for a fraction of the cost of
27:31
a brand new car from off a lot.
27:33
Right. And it'll last you as long as you take care of it. I remember our dad
27:36
would just tell us, he's like, hey, as long as you change the oil and put gas
27:40
in it, it'll last forever. and he was not mechanically inclined at all.
27:44
And even with him, his used cars would last for years. I know cars are different
27:48
today than they were years ago, but still, you can find yourself a car.
27:53
If you're really tight and you need transportation.
27:56
Three four five thousand dollars you can actually still find a car even with
27:59
high mileage that's going to last you as long as you take care of it i'm i'm
28:03
experienced i've never bought a brand new car,
28:05
and i've i've driven these cars until the the wheels fall off and it would sometimes
28:12
take years and years and years for that to happen,
28:15
but here's the here's the opportunity cost i like doing the math on this stuff
28:18
because i'm kind of a nerd about the finances now,
28:21
but let's say there's you're putting a thousand dollars a month into a car and
28:25
what's the average interest rate it's like six percent right you're put you're paying six percent,
28:31
to some dealership and you're sending that guy's kids to school so that that
28:37
six percent is what you're losing in addition to appreciation in addition to
28:42
the repairs and the maintenance of,
28:44
a new vehicle over time and it all adds up really quickly, but imagine if you
28:50
took $1,000 and invested it and you were making 6%.
28:55
And what's the number of years people usually finance for? Like,
28:59
I don't know, like six. At least five, six years now. Sometimes seven.
29:03
It just depends. Seven years. Yeah. So you're out however much money,
29:09
right? $70,000 plus interest and maintenance and repairs.
29:14
If you took that same thousand dollars and put it into an investment account
29:18
for the future and it and it earned and.
29:22
A measly 6%, the same of what you're paying, you would end up with $83,000 in that same time period.
29:30
$83,000. The money that you're paying for a stupid car. But anyways,
29:35
I wanted to plug that in there because that's the math.
29:38
And that's the hard numbers behind that. That's the impact. Here's the thing with that statement.
29:44
Once you put that money into a savings or an investment account,
29:48
and you just did it for five years, and then you stopped putting any more money
29:52
in it, the interest itself would continue to grow. Oh, yeah.
29:56
They call it the magic of compounding. That's right. And it's compound interest.
30:00
That means that the interest will gain interest as it gains interest on top of interest.
30:06
So that's where your money works 24 hours a day.
30:09
And that leads into number two, really, because that's the other one that stuck
30:12
out was number Number two is that money is a neutral substance.
30:16
It's a tool. It is nothing but a tool.
30:19
If you love it, if you trust in it, all those things are absolutely wrong.
30:24
But if you use it as a tool, as God intended, and there's biblical principle
30:28
to that, that's how you're supposed to use it.
30:30
And the money works for you. They're like your employees. And if you use it
30:34
right, if you deploy it correctly, that's what it will do for you,
30:39
and you'll be blessed because of it.
30:41
Right. Right. Well, the one that probably stands out to me is number five.
30:47
Most financial problems can be traced to ignorance, indulgence, or irresponsibility.
30:52
And I can say I was guilty of all three of those. And me too.
30:55
So, yeah, you know, and here's the thing, and this is, I didn't say this in the beginning,
31:01
but most people don't realize that the three greatest reasons,
31:04
and this was part of a, I can't remember this study, but they wanted to find
31:08
out what was the three, or there was like five of the most common reasons why
31:12
people go through a divorce.
31:14
And they said the three top reasons, number one was infidelity.
31:18
I think that's obvious, right? A spouse cheating on another spouse.
31:22
The number two was the wrong third party in a marriage.
31:26
So, for example, the wife's mother controls the marriage and she gets all her
31:31
advice from her mom, right?
31:32
Or the husband gets all his advice from his buddies at work about how to manage
31:37
his marriage. So, the wrong third party.
31:39
And then, of course, number three, the number three top most reason was money. Money problem.
31:45
So what's interesting is people think oh it's incompatibility or you know they've
31:50
fallen out of love no one of the most the most common reasons that that a husband
31:56
and wife will fall out of a marriage is money,
31:58
so when it comes back to this most financial problems can be traced to ignorance
32:02
indulgence or irresponsibility i mean ignorance that's i mean obviously we've
32:07
we've been talking about it we didn't know anything about money,
32:09
we don't know how to control it i didn't even know Where my money was going Okay,
32:15
And I think that was the big, and I'm sure, Alan, you probably have a story
32:18
like this, but I remember when I first started digging into money,
32:22
one of the first exercises you had to do was you had to track at least 60 to
32:27
90 days of your spending. I did six months.
32:31
I went ahead and dumped every one of my financial accounts, my bank accounts,
32:35
my debit card transactions, credit card transactions, everything.
32:39
And I traced six months worth of my spending.
32:44
And here's the thing. I was making six figures a year at this point.
32:49
And this was, I'd say, I want to say six, seven, eight years into our marriage.
32:55
And I was making six figures a year and I was living month to month, barely.
32:59
I mean, literally, I would have almost nothing in my bank account by the end of the paycheck.
33:04
And so I was like, man, where is this money going? And so guess what?
33:07
I did the six-month exercise.
33:10
I found out that going out to eat and and food we were spending almost four
33:17
to five thousand dollars a month on just going out to eat,
33:21
that's i i think if you if people have heard that four to five thousand that's
33:27
fifty to sixty thousand dollars a year going out to eat think about it this way,
33:33
these weren't like really nice posh dinners they were just like going through
33:37
the drive-thru getting a coffee,
33:39
getting the the the food for the kids just stuff like that right but never yeah
33:44
never quit cooking at home always going out to eat and of course i had five
33:47
kids at the time so there's seven of us every every time we went out to eat
33:50
it was seven of us you know,
33:52
and i'm telling you you know that that was probably one of the most eye-opening
33:57
things i'd seen in my life and it's just like wow so the ignorance piece is
34:03
it's kind of a two-way street it's like.
34:05
Not being, like, not having knowledge about how to manage money,
34:09
but also not knowing where your money's going.
34:12
And then, of course, indulgence, right? I got to have that now.
34:16
That was probably one of the hardest things is if I saw it and I liked it,
34:20
in my mind, I, like, I needed to have it. I needed to get it right then and there.
34:24
So if I didn't have the cash on me, credit card. Boom. I can get,
34:28
I can just pay it off later. I'll just make minimum payments on my credit card.
34:32
Well, here's the problem is those minimum payments add up.
34:35
And so, and then of course, irresponsibility. I mean, there was times that I
34:39
needed money for a very important, like, you know, utilities or bills or things
34:44
like that. I remember missing car payments because we wanted to go out to eat.
34:49
I mean, literally my credit was, I mean, my credit was so horrible by the time,
34:54
you know, we had, we lived in Dallas for a while.
34:57
By the time we moved to Austin, it's like, man, my, my, our,
35:00
my finances was just, it was junk.
35:03
I mean, it was horrible horrible and it took me A long time to try to buy a house our first house.
35:12
I remember, you know, what should have taken about a month To close and get all that stuff.
35:16
It took me almost three months because I had to chase down Every single creditor
35:21
I own that I owed and here's what I didn't I didn't mention this earlier But
35:26
when I was in the air force when I was 22 years old, I got I was getting out of the air force,
35:30
the year before I got out I declared bankruptcy because I was so far in debt
35:34
I couldn't pay so of course I destroyed my credit with bankruptcy I didn't have a dime to my name,
35:40
anyway I'm just I'm just telling people go oh well you know Robert is not that bad and you know you're,
35:47
I don't think people understand just how bad it was.
35:51
And and and I'm telling you that there it was you know with our marriage it
35:55
was kind of on the brink I mean there was times where me and Yvonne we it was just horrible.
36:01
You know what I mean? Week after week and both, neither one of us was good at money.
36:06
I was going to ask you because you're telling me the statistics on marriage,
36:10
which is astounding that finances is the core of that.
36:14
I know it's kind of a personal thing.
36:17
When we're talking about finances, the finances are personal.
36:21
But I would say that was the tension and probably the struggle that you had,
36:27
when you were young and married.
36:29
Same exact thing here for like five to ten years.
36:33
That was like a source of tension. was the finances. Yep.
36:40
Yep. And I don't think people realize just how harsh it can be.
36:46
Because you feel like you're in a prison. You can't get out of it.
36:51
You're stuck. You're not making any more money.
36:53
You know what I mean? You can't free up your income. You've got all these debts
36:56
and these obligations that now you've just tied yourself to because of stupidity
37:00
and irresponsibility, indulgence, and ignorance, right?
37:04
And, you know, that pressure's got to come out somewhere and it comes out in your marriage.
37:09
You get frustrated. Your wife wants something nice. You know,
37:12
you guys just want to go out somewhere nice and you can't afford it.
37:15
You're living paycheck to paycheck.
37:17
You know, your vehicle breaks down for the fifth time, you know,
37:21
and you're still making payments on it.
37:23
Dude, that's so bad when that happens, when you're barely surviving.
37:28
I mean, I'm sure a lot of people have been there, but if you're not managing
37:31
your money right, you're in debt, you're spending more than what you have,
37:34
and your car breaks down, it's like this earth-shattering moment.
37:40
That's how much of a big impact it is for somebody. Here's the thing,
37:45
too. I think that people—number one is none of it's yours. It all belongs to God.
37:51
Honestly, until that became clear to me, like it's easy to say that off the
37:58
top. Oh, you know, well, I know everything belongs to God. But that's not how you live.
38:02
You don't really believe that. You know, if you look at your spending habits
38:06
over the last 90 days, could you really look at your bank account and your spending
38:10
habit and say, yeah, I really belong.
38:13
All this belongs to God. No.
38:15
You think the money's yours and you spend according to your preferences and
38:20
your likes and your lust.
38:22
And so when I finally acknowledged, man, God, this is your money.
38:28
These are your resources and I've abused them. And I've sinned against you with
38:34
regard to my responsibility, my obligation.
38:37
That was the start. I needed to be there. I needed to get to that point where
38:42
I realized it is my fault. for getting us here. I'm the man of the house.
38:47
I should have been more responsible. I should have understood these things.
38:51
Okay. So I'm not going to say that it was just our parents' fault for not teaching
38:54
us. It was as much my fault as anything else.
38:58
You know, I could have learned these things, but that's what I did.
39:00
And so, you know, cause it is, it could get really drear if we keep going through
39:05
all these stories, horror stories,
39:07
but I would tell folks that are listening to us that are maybe struggling,
39:11
the light at the end of the tunnel starts where you acknowledge This belongs to God.
39:16
Hi everyone, this is Alan We're concluding part 1 of the 15 Principles of Financial
39:21
Stewardship We'll be continuing in part 2 next week So we hope to see you there as well,
39:27
We hope you've enjoyed the episode and what you've heard so far If you'd like
39:32
more information You can find us at theimmutableword.com If you'd like to drop us a line
39:38
You can do so at theimmutableword.gmail.com So thanks again for listening We
39:44
hope to see you on the next episode. Take care.