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Whose Well Done Are You Working For? · Grace for My Home | Christian Women, Growing in Faith

• 1:14
  Audrey McCracken: Hello friends, welcome back to Grace from a Home.
• 1:17
  Audrey McCracken: I hope and pray that you have had a great week.
• 1:21
  Audrey McCracken: We've had some challenges this week.
• 1:24
  Audrey McCracken: I have had the flu and I'm getting over that.
• 1:27
  Audrey McCracken: So if you hear it in my voice, that's what it is I'm getting over it.
• 1:31
  Audrey McCracken: And my oldest son, david, he has been sick also, but thankfully nobody else in the house has been sick.
• 1:40
  Audrey McCracken: I've been trying to keep my distance from them, but you know how that is as a mom that just kind of throws a wrench into everything because you're the hub.
• 1:48
  Audrey McCracken: You're the hub of everything that happens in the home and so when you're down, everything stops.
• 1:53
  Audrey McCracken: But I have people who love me.
• 1:56
  Audrey McCracken: My mom has has been great.
• 1:58
  Audrey McCracken: She's been helping me, she's been coming and helping with the clothes and things like that.
• 2:04
  Audrey McCracken: And then my mother-in-law cooked us dinner tonight.
• 2:07
  Audrey McCracken: She she made us something because she knew we were tired of eating sandwiches.
• 2:12
  Audrey McCracken: So she made us a good meal and I thank the Lord for for my mom and for my mother-in-law and for others that have checked in on us.
• 2:21
  Audrey McCracken: And today I almost didn't record tonight, but I thought about you ladies and how many listen, and I just didn't want to disappoint you because I know how much work this mama gig is.
• 2:36
  Audrey McCracken: It's a lot of work.
• 2:38
  Audrey McCracken: It's emotional work, it's physical work, it's mental work, it's spiritual work.
• 2:43
  Audrey McCracken: It's a lot of work.
• 2:45
  Audrey McCracken: And anything that I can do to encourage you in this work I want to do because I believe in what you're doing.
• 2:54
  Audrey McCracken: I know it's important.
• 2:55
  Audrey McCracken: It's not just important for here, it's for here and now.
• 3:00
  Audrey McCracken: It's eternally important.
• 3:01
  Audrey McCracken: And though I can be overly dramatic, I do mean that I believe that the work that you are doing in your home every day as a mom is some of the most important work that is happening in the earth right now.
• 3:18
  Audrey McCracken: Because by making stable homes for our children, by being a stability in their lives, by giving them somebody who cares, by praying for them and pointing them to Jesus, you are doing God's work.
• 3:37
  Audrey McCracken: You're doing eternal work and it will matter hundreds of years from now, and you need to know that.
• 3:44
  Audrey McCracken: You need somebody to tell you that, to remind you of that.
• 3:48
  Audrey McCracken: I do too.
• 3:49
  Audrey McCracken: We need each other.
• 3:52
  Audrey McCracken: We really do.
• 3:54
  Audrey McCracken: You know God has mentioned last week.
• 3:57
  Audrey McCracken: He made us to thrive in community, and so when we fight against that, you know, when we decide to be a lone ranger and we don't surround ourselves with people maybe because we've been hurt or we just don't trust people or for various reasons Then we work against our own nature and it's only to our harm, because we flourish when we are in community and God knows what we need, even when we don't know what we need, even when we refuse to believe that he knows what's best for us.
• 4:35
  Audrey McCracken: And so sometimes we need each other to remind ourselves hey, you need some people to talk to, you need to be around other people.
• 4:44
  Audrey McCracken: I want to share my heart with you this week, something that I have been thinking about for quite a while, and one of the things that I'm most thankful to the Lord for is our free will.
• 4:59
  Audrey McCracken: No, god did not make us robots.
• 5:00
  Audrey McCracken: There is no, there's no joy if someone cannot help but love you.
• 5:07
  Audrey McCracken: If they have to love you, then that's not really love.
• 5:10
  Audrey McCracken: And God created us, put us mankind into a garden and gave him and her them a choice to love him and obey him, which go along together.
• 5:27
  Audrey McCracken: You know, jesus said if you love me, you'll obey my commandments.
• 5:29
  Audrey McCracken: And he gave them a choice because he did not want puppets, he wanted people and he wanted those to love him who chose to love him with a free will, and so our free will is so precious, and God will not violate that free will.
• 5:48
  Audrey McCracken: And we have been given this awesome gift.
• 5:52
  Audrey McCracken: And that gift is our freedom to choose, our free will to make our own choices, to decide for ourselves what path we're going to take, if we're going to choose God or if we're not.
• 6:04
  Audrey McCracken: You know, he loves us so much that he even gives us the power to decide not to serve him and not to love him, because love that is forced is not love at all, and with that comes a huge responsibility.
• 6:21
  Audrey McCracken: What are we going to do with this free will?
• 6:23
  Audrey McCracken: Well, hopefully we're going to take that free will, we're going to turn it towards him and we're going to serve him and love him.
• 6:30
  Audrey McCracken: But I think it's important for us to know that we have that choice, because we do have an enemy who does not even want us to think that we have a free will.
• 6:39
  Audrey McCracken: He wants us to think that we're just floating along and whatever happens to us happens.
• 6:46
  Audrey McCracken: We're just a product of our environment or nature or chemistry, and we just have no ability to change our future.
• 6:56
  Audrey McCracken: Whatever we'll be will be, and that's not true.
• 7:00
  Audrey McCracken: We can make changes.
• 7:02
  Audrey McCracken: We cannot change the past, but we can change our future today by the choices that we make.
• 7:08
  Audrey McCracken: And I think it's important that we know that as moms and that we teach that to our children, that our choices really matter.
• 7:16
  Audrey McCracken: This is not a game we're playing.
• 7:18
  Audrey McCracken: It really matters.
• 7:21
  Audrey McCracken: And one of my favorite parables and you'll just have to forgive me if you I don't know how many times I've spoken about this parable during the year and a half that I've done the podcast but one of my favorite parables is the parable of the talents, which is in Matthew 25.
• 7:37
  Audrey McCracken: There's just so much gold in that.
• 7:39
  Audrey McCracken: I did not mean that at that point, but I guess it's there right.
• 7:43
  Audrey McCracken: But there's so much treasure in that parable because in that parable God shows the power of choice.
• 7:54
  Audrey McCracken: He shows the freedom that he's given us.
• 7:57
  Audrey McCracken: He gives us things and says do with them what you will, but make something out of them.
• 8:03
  Audrey McCracken: Don't go barium.
• 8:05
  Audrey McCracken: He doesn't tell us exactly how to do it or where to go.
• 8:09
  Audrey McCracken: He just gives it to us and says now, when I come back, let's see what you've done with that.
• 8:14
  Audrey McCracken: And that's a little scary, right?
• 8:17
  Audrey McCracken: I mean I'd like the instruction manual, please.
• 8:19
  Audrey McCracken: I'd like you to show me one, two and three.
• 8:21
  Audrey McCracken: So I know I did it right.
• 8:23
  Audrey McCracken: What if I go out and try and I lose everything?
• 8:25
  Audrey McCracken: It's part of me wishes that was like the fourth servant in the parable, so I could see what God would do with him.
• 9:13
  Audrey McCracken: Because what if I'm that one?
• 9:15
  Audrey McCracken: What if I'm the one who goes out to invest it and I lose everything?
• 9:18
  Audrey McCracken: I make bad investments.
• 9:20
  Audrey McCracken: But what happened to that guy?
• 9:21
  Audrey McCracken: I always wonder, lord, what if that was me Right?
• 9:26
  Audrey McCracken: But I just have to believe that at least he tried, right.
• 9:32
  Audrey McCracken: He didn't bury it.
• 9:35
  Audrey McCracken: But one of the things that I want to talk with you about today in that parable is the verse.
• 9:40
  Audrey McCracken: There's actually two verses.
• 9:43
  Audrey McCracken: It says in verse 21, and in verse 23 he's speaking to the servant who had five talents, who made it, who invested and grew it to ten talents, and the one who had two talents and invested and grew it into four talents.
• 10:02
  Audrey McCracken: He says to them both the same thing.
• 10:03
  Audrey McCracken: His master said to him Well done, good and faithful servant, you have been faithful over little.
• 10:12
  Audrey McCracken: I will set you over much.
• 10:14
  Audrey McCracken: Enter into the joy of your master, and that is our goal.
• 10:22
  Audrey McCracken: You know there is something about us that wants to hear well done, you did a good job, and I think that's just built in us.
• 10:33
  Audrey McCracken: I know kids.
• 10:35
  Audrey McCracken: I know it's built into kids.
• 10:37
  Audrey McCracken: Now you get so much more out of a kid with praise than you do with scolding or with fault finding or pointing out their weaknesses.
• 10:47
  Audrey McCracken: If you can zone in on something that they've done well and you can encourage them in that area and just praise them for that one thing, you will get so much more mileage out of that than finding their faults and picking them apart, because that discourages.
• 11:06
  Audrey McCracken: But praise encourages and gives them courage.
• 11:10
  Audrey McCracken: It gives them hope.
• 11:11
  Audrey McCracken: It helps them see themselves as one who is capable instead of one that's not capable, and so that gives them hope, gives them a reason to try harder, to try harder the next time.
• 11:24
  Audrey McCracken: And you know, I found that true in my life.
• 11:28
  Audrey McCracken: I found that true in the lives of my children.
• 11:30
  Audrey McCracken: I think most of us believe that to be true.
• 11:34
  Audrey McCracken: But one of the most important things as a mom is for us to get clear on who's well done we're looking for.
• 11:42
  Audrey McCracken: You know, as a homeschool mom and I understand that a lot of ladies out here who are listening are not homeschool moms have never been, never will be.
• 11:53
  Audrey McCracken: But being a homeschool mom taught me so much because of the responsibility that I felt when I took over the education of my children, it got real, real fast.
• 12:06
  Audrey McCracken: You know, there's something about being able.
• 12:09
  Audrey McCracken: You know, now I have two kids in public school and so I don't feel all of the weight of the responsibility on me as I did when they were at home with me.
• 12:19
  Audrey McCracken: And my husband is an education, and one day I'll tell you guys the story of how we went into homeschooling.
• 12:28
  Audrey McCracken: It's kind of funny actually, and but I remember the Lord had put it on my heart to homeschool them and had not put it on my husband's heart, it was on my heart.
• 12:39
  Audrey McCracken: But I remember when I got in the middle of it and I was trying to teach them to read, and I was trying to teach them to write and teach them to math and and the basics like the basics, right, like the things you have to know.
• 12:53
  Audrey McCracken: And I remember thinking this is all on me.
• 12:56
  Audrey McCracken: And another thought if I don't do this, well, their dad is going to kill me because I've taken this on, and if they can't read, it's all on me.
• 13:09
  Audrey McCracken: And I remember listening to a podcast.
• 13:14
  Audrey McCracken: At that time I was listening to a lot of podcasts on homeschooling and and reading books on different ways to homeschool and I was grasping for something encouraging and helpful.
• 13:27
  Audrey McCracken: And I remember somebody said something and it stuck in my mind and I took it as mine.
• 13:32
  Audrey McCracken: I thought that's mine, I'm going to use that.
• 13:34
  Audrey McCracken: And he said who's well done Are you looking for?
• 13:37
  Audrey McCracken: That is so important, that question is so important, not just for a homeschool mama, but for a mama, for a person, for everybody.
• 13:50
  Audrey McCracken: Who's well done are we looking for?
• 13:53
  Audrey McCracken: You know my natural.
• 13:54
  Audrey McCracken: You know we all have different personalities.
• 13:56
  Audrey McCracken: I am naturally inclined to please.
• 13:59
  Audrey McCracken: I think a lot of moms are maybe not all.
• 14:03
  Audrey McCracken: I know not all, but me, just my personality, I just I like people to go along, I like harmony.
• 14:10
  Audrey McCracken: You know I like to make people smile and happy.
• 14:12
  Audrey McCracken: You know I'm not always like that, but generally I like to see people get along right.
• 14:20
  Audrey McCracken: Why can't we just all be happy?
• 14:23
  Audrey McCracken: Well, the danger in that is that everybody can't be happy all the time, and so if I'm gonna have to choose who's going to be happy, I need to make sure I'm pleasing the right one or the right ones If I choose to please the world instead of pleasing my father, then in the end I've lost everything.
• 14:49
  Audrey McCracken: I've lost everything.
• 14:50
  Audrey McCracken: I've lost the whole point.
• 14:51
  Audrey McCracken: See, the point is what has my father asked me to do?
• 14:56
  Audrey McCracken: And am I doing that?
• 15:00
  Audrey McCracken: Because I can make the whole world happy and everybody loved me and liked me, but if I'm not doing what he asked of me, then it doesn't matter.
• 15:10
  Audrey McCracken: And really, that question you know, what is my father asked of me?
• 15:16
  Audrey McCracken: That really brings things back to bare minimum.
• 15:18
  Audrey McCracken: I mean, it's really the basics.
• 15:21
  Audrey McCracken: Sometimes we're running around trying to please so many people that don't even know we're trying to please them.
• 15:25
  Audrey McCracken: It's not like they've put this expectation on us.
• 15:27
  Audrey McCracken: A lot of times we'll do it to ourselves, but we're running around trying to make so many people happy or trying to do the right things in all these areas when God didn't even ask us to.
• 15:41
  Audrey McCracken: It's just what we feel like we're supposed to do or we think is expected of us.
• 15:46
  Audrey McCracken: And sometimes we just have to get along and hear from my father and say Father, what do you want me to do at this time, at this juncture, at this season?
• 15:55
  Audrey McCracken: What is your will for me right now?
• 15:57
  Audrey McCracken: And you know a lot of times and I don't want to put a percentage on it because everybody's different, but I'll say for myself probably 80% of the time I'm doing things he never really asked of me, I just felt like they were required or things I was supposed to be doing, and I'm running around you know, here in the South we use the term I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off, and I've actually seen that.
• 16:27
  Audrey McCracken: You know, I've seen a chicken with his head cut off, so I know what that looks like.
• 16:32
  Audrey McCracken: It's like you're running around in a panic and you have no purpose, you're just trying, it's just a frantic frenzy and you're not even doing the most important things.
• 16:42
  Audrey McCracken: And that's where we can find ourselves if we don't get along with God, we don't get quiet and we don't hear our father say this is what I need you to do right now, because that's the most important thing.
• 16:57
  Audrey McCracken: Because when it's all said and done, when all of the books are shut, you know, when we're standing before him, what we want to hear is well done, my good and faithful servant, enter into your master's joy, and that's when you've done his will, and everything in this world will put more and more layers on us, but when we get along with him and quiet, when we get along with him, we can hear his voice and he can put his finger on the things that he wants us to do and show us all the things we're doing that he did not call us to do.
• 17:37
  Audrey McCracken: And those are the things usually that are bringing us the stress, that are bringing us the heaviness, that are causing us to feel like he is not faithful, because we are given out, because we're give out, because we're tired, and if he was faithful, we wouldn't be this tired.
• 17:56
  Audrey McCracken: And so it's one of those moments we need, those moments where we get along with him and we're like Lord, you don't have to show me what I'm doing, that's not from you, because obviously I'm doing some things that you didn't ask me to do, and we need to hear Lord, what did you ask me to do?
• 18:18
  Audrey McCracken: And we need to search our hearts and we need to find out, lord, who's well done?
• 18:24
  Audrey McCracken: Am I working for?
• 18:26
  Audrey McCracken: Am I trying to please the people at church so they think well of me?
• 18:30
  Audrey McCracken: You know, am I trying to impress the other moms, the other homeschool moms, so they think well of me?
• 18:40
  Audrey McCracken: Am I trying to impress.
• 18:43
  Audrey McCracken: Am I trying to please my husband?
• 18:45
  Audrey McCracken: Now?
• 18:46
  Audrey McCracken: There's nothing wrong with pleasing your husband.
• 18:48
  Audrey McCracken: I mean, there's a certain amount of good will, right, that you want in your marriage, where we're serving each other, we're helping each other, we're working together.
• 18:56
  Audrey McCracken: That's a good, positive thing.
• 18:58
  Audrey McCracken: But he's not your God he is.
• 19:05
  Audrey McCracken: He's your husband, right?
• 19:07
  Audrey McCracken: He's not the well done that you're looking for.
• 19:09
  Audrey McCracken: We love him because God told us to.
• 19:12
  Audrey McCracken: You know we love him and treat him well because God asks us to.
• 19:18
  Audrey McCracken: But he's not our God.
• 19:20
  Audrey McCracken: You know our husband's not our God.
• 19:22
  Audrey McCracken: Our children are not our God.
• 19:24
  Audrey McCracken: God is our God.
• 19:26
  Audrey McCracken: You know it's even with our children.
• 19:28
  Audrey McCracken: We're not trying to please our children.
• 19:30
  Audrey McCracken: You know there are times that we'll do things that will just thrill them and they'll be so happy with us.
• 19:36
  Audrey McCracken: But you know as well as I do discipline and correction.
• 19:39
  Audrey McCracken: They're hard and that's part of our job too, and they're never gonna like that.
• 19:43
  Audrey McCracken: You know discipline seems painful at the time, but in the end it produces righteousness, right?
• 19:49
  Audrey McCracken: So we have to play both sides of that coin for them.
• 19:53
  Audrey McCracken: So we can't be trying to please them.
• 19:55
  Audrey McCracken: We have to cut everything back and see Lord, are we trying to please you.
• 20:01
  Audrey McCracken: Who's well done Are we looking for?
• 20:04
  Audrey McCracken: And as mamas, we get to choose.
• 20:08
  Audrey McCracken: That's a choice, see, that should make us feel empowered.
• 20:12
  Audrey McCracken: We get to choose who's well done we're looking for, who's well done we're working for and we can love people, but we don't have to try to please them.
• 20:25
  Audrey McCracken: No, actually, if we love people, if we really love people, then we need to put God first.
• 20:35
  Audrey McCracken: I found out early in my marriage and I have to keep getting reminded of this, it's one of those lessons that it's human nature to think one day that you're above it.
• 20:44
  Audrey McCracken: But I found out early in my marriage that my marriage is only as good, is only as strong, is only as happy as my relationship with Jesus.
• 20:55
  Audrey McCracken: See, if I try to make my husband meet all of my needs, then I put an unrealistic expectation on him that he cannot carry, and it's a heavy burden on him and it it's sour as our relationship.
• 21:11
  Audrey McCracken: See, if I put all of, if I make him responsible for all my happiness and all my joy and all my self-worth, that is more than my husband can carry.
• 21:23
  Audrey McCracken: Those are things I need Jesus for, and so I have to have a strong relationship with Jesus so that I don't put heavy burdens on my husband that he was never created to carry, because it will sour our relationship, because he knows he can't and I will look to him for things he can't do.
• 21:45
  Audrey McCracken: And it goes vice versa.
• 21:47
  Audrey McCracken: It goes the other way too.
• 21:48
  Audrey McCracken: You know, you can't be that for your husband.
• 21:51
  Audrey McCracken: You can't be everything he needs.
• 21:53
  Audrey McCracken: He needs Jesus, and so when we're walking together with Jesus, it's a lot easier than me putting all of my emotional needs in the hands of my husband, who cannot carry them.
• 22:06
  Audrey McCracken: And so we have to say Lord, who's well done Am I looking for?
• 22:10
  Audrey McCracken: Am I looking for my husband's well done?
• 22:11
  Audrey McCracken: I want him to be pleased, I want him to be happy with me, but ultimately my heart's desire has to be that I please my father.
• 22:22
  Audrey McCracken: Now.
• 22:23
  Audrey McCracken: He said love your husbands Right, he said honor and respect your husbands.
• 22:28
  Audrey McCracken: So in doing so I'm obeying my father.
• 22:31
  Audrey McCracken: But ultimately my goal is Jesus.
• 22:35
  Audrey McCracken: I hope that makes sense, because remembering that really helps me in my marriage, and I can tell sometimes when I put too much on my husband Because, instead of drawing near to me, I feel him wanting to draw back, because it's an unreasonable request to ask somebody to be more than God created them to be for you, and we all or I should say many of us fall into that trap often, and the world sets us up for that, you know, especially around this time of year the day that I'm recording this right now is Valentine's Day and so a lot of times we put this unrealistic expectation on our spouse and when they don't meet it, then we feel disappointed, like somehow we're not worthy or somehow we got a dud, you know, and we didn't.
• 23:29
  Audrey McCracken: We didn't.
• 23:31
  Audrey McCracken: It's just they're not us, they don't think like us and they're never going to love us like Jesus does.
• 23:38
  Audrey McCracken: So I just encourage you this week to ask yourself who's well done?
• 23:43
  Audrey McCracken: Am I working for you know?
• 23:46
  Audrey McCracken: Who's well done?
• 23:47
  Audrey McCracken: Am I longing to hear?
• 23:50
  Audrey McCracken: And that will eliminate some, a lot of the expectations that you've put on yourself, because you know you can love people, but you don't have to be beholden to them.
• 24:07
  Audrey McCracken: You can love people but you don't have to try to please them.
• 24:12
  Audrey McCracken: Actually, if you're trying to please everybody, then you are carrying a lot of heavy burdens.
• 24:17
  Audrey McCracken: Jesus said his yoke is easy and his burden is light.
• 24:24
  Audrey McCracken: Amen, lord, I pray for my sisters in the faith.
• 24:27
  Audrey McCracken: Lord, we need you.
• 24:29
  Audrey McCracken: We can't do this alone and I pray, lord, for your strength in us this week.
• 24:34
  Audrey McCracken: I pray, lord, god, that you'd give us new eyes.
• 24:36
  Audrey McCracken: I pray, god, that you would help us to see ourselves through your eyes.
• 24:40
  Audrey McCracken: I pray, lord, god, that our hearts desire would be that one day we would stand before you and we would hear those words well done, my good and faithful servant.
• 24:49
  Audrey McCracken: Enter into the joy of your master and Lord.
• 24:52
  Audrey McCracken: I just pray that we would live every day, lord, with that hope in mind.
• 24:57
  Audrey McCracken: And, lord, I just pray, lord, for them.
• 25:00
  Audrey McCracken: Today, I cover them in your love and in your promises, in Jesus' name, amen.