Latest / The Play Therapy Circle / Episode 41 - Reflections on the Road - Come with Us!

Transcript

Episode 41 - Reflections on the Road - Come with Us! · The Play Therapy Circle

• 0:00
  Hi there and welcome to the. Play therapy circle.
• 0:04
  Before we begin, Please note this podcast is for
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  informational and educational purposes only.
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  It does not provide therapeutic advice and listening does not
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  create a client therapist relationship.
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  All views expressed are my own and any case example shared have
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  been de identified to protect privacy.
• 0:24
  If you're seeking personal support, please reach out to a
• 0:27
  qualified mental health professional in your area.
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  Hi and. Welcome to an episode of the
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  Play Therapy Circle. I'm Kylie Ellison, a therapist,
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  clinical supervisor and play therapy trainer, and I'm.
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  So grateful. You're here.
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  This podcast is a space. For thoughtful, soulful.
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  Conversations about child centred therapy, play based work
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  and what it means to show up with presence and compassion.
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  Both for our. Clients and for ourselves.
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  Whether you're a seasoned play therapist, a student just
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  starting out, or someone deeply passionate about working with
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  children, you belong here. Hey everyone, and welcome back
• 1:14
  to the Play Therapy Circle podcast.
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  I'm your host, Kylie Ellison, and I am so glad you are here,
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  you guys. You guys.
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  Oh my God. When I tell you that I have had
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  the most unhinged day probably to date, I'm not joking.
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  And we talk about our tenants of CCPT, about being congruent and
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  often having that authenticity. So I'm going to share with you
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  what my day has been like because I had every intention of
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  recording the podcast probably should have been yesterday.
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  Let's be real, it's Thursday, it's Thursday and it's right now
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  640 PMI should have recorded it early in the morning.
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  Did I stay up last night and watch reality television?
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  Yes, yes I did. Did I then not give myself
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  enough time this morning? Also yes.
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  So I have been this week, you guys, I had this whole episode.
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  I was so excited. I recorded the 1st 10 minutes of
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  it, you guys, based off so much conversation that I've had this
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  week. And I had recorded the 1st 10
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  minutes and then I got a phone call on my hotel phone and they
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  were like, oh, your, your driver is hit like your, you know, like
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  your service to pick you up to take you to the next venue is
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  here. And I was like, Oh my God,
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  they're half an hour early. So I literally had to like pause
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  the podcast and then leave it because the rest of the day has
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  been unhinged. And so I am just now at 640
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  getting a chance to record this. I have not ordered dinner.
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  Let me tell you about my day. OK, so that happened.
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  So they were like half an hour early, so that was fine.
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  So this week let me kind of like bounce around, but like follow
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  along. So this week I am in Victoria.
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  I have only been here a handful of times before, but not to any
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  of the places that I've been so far this week.
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  So it's been so cool to go to all of these different places in
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  Victoria. And for all of my beautiful
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  supervisees who were keen to catch up and were sending me
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  messages, I am so sorry that I have not made it this week to
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  you. It has been such a big week,
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  like way bigger than I thought that it would be.
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  And I have definitely, I'm definitely like on the second
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  last day. Tomorrow is the last day.
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  And then I fly home tomorrow night and I'm just like on the
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  last kind of slide of energy left in me.
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  So it's been huge, a huge week. So I started in Bendigo on
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  Monday. I have been, that was a smaller
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  group. I want to think so far it's
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  pushing up to like 60-70 people I've connected with over the
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  last three days and I've got one more training tomorrow.
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  So it's been a huge cohort of people in a really short amount
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  of time that I've been doing Charles and her play therapy
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  training with. So it's been massive.
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  But Bendigo team were beautiful. Hello to the Bendigo team.
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  Hi, you guys from Monday, you were incredible.
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  Ballarat team represent. You guys on Tuesday were unreal.
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  You were so great. Wednesday was a beautiful
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  reflective group. I loved connecting with everyone
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  in Windham Vale yesterday and then today was travel day.
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  I have made it to Mildura and so tomorrow I'm training in Mildura
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  and then flying home so I haven't met the Mildura crew yet
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  but I'm looking forward to it. I am a Brisbane girl through and
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  through and it's been like 8° here, 10° and it's like 28° at
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  home. So I am not OK, still not OK.
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  So, so I've been doing the training which has been my, my
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  absolute passion. You guys like when I get to
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  share CCPT. It's why I do this podcast
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  because I could talk about child centre play therapy for days.
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  So I love to do it in any kind of, you know, space that I can.
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  So in two weeks time I'm presenting at a conference in
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  Cairns because presenting at conferences is another way to
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  get child centre play therapy out there.
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  So I just do all of the different things, right?
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  So today was supposed to be an easy day.
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  She wasn't guys. She wasn't not even close.
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  So I got to Armadale because I was like, Oh my God, we all have
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  dreams, right? We all have like things in our
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  life that we're just like one day, one day I'll take a trip to
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  Greece, you know, one day I'll, you know, learn how to speak
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  Spanish, you know, like those kind of like big kind of things
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  that you're like, will I do it? I don't, I'm not sure.
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  Maybe I will, maybe I'll work. So the thing for me was the
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  opportunity to go to High Street in Armadale.
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  And I know that's not going to mean much to many people, but if
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  you love kind of clothing and those kinds of things, I've
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  really like become kind of really interested in like
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  putting together outfits and putting together different
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  pieces and like everyone has to have a hobby, right?
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  So I guess this is my hobby. So I was like beyond excited.
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  I was sharing on the socials all day, kind of the adventures of
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  going to High Street. It was beautiful, but it didn't
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  necessarily completely go to plan.
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  So that was fine. And ended up finding a toy store
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  because I'm a play therapist, like, you know, in a high
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  fashion, kind of like, you know, very unique sort of.
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  Yeah. Like there was an Arms of Eve
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  store. Oh my God, you guys.
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  Like there was so many stores where I was like, I actually
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  can't go in here because this is just like, this is my Mecca.
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  Like I'm just so like, overloaded with excitement there
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  in a street like that. As a play therapist, you can bet
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  I will find a toy store. So I did and bought a couple of
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  presents before my kids. I promise, even though they're
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  teenagers, the presents I've got I know they'll love.
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  So like that was a win. That was a win in the day.
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  Then I had just like a bunch of work to do.
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  So I made my way to the airport and I shared on the socials as
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  well. I got myself completely confused
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  and thinking that I was going to a regional airport, not
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  Melbourne Airport, which is obviously big.
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  So like confused myself and my incredible Shaz like has helped
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  me together this week and then I get on the plane and I've got
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  here and I've realised that I packed too much stuff like I
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  did. I just like I packed 2 jackets
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  like I've I've worn one, I've not worn the other one, but it
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  takes up so much room. So I then had to get an Uber to
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  Kmart and buy a suitcase and then get an Uber to get back
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  because I don't have a car because I'm in Mildura.
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  And now I'm here. Oh my God.
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  So thank you for listening to my Ted talk on how to be an
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  unorganised, unhinged 43 year old ADHD person who has no idea
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  what she's doing. But this is a podcast where you
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  weren't necessarily asking for that information.
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  You're here because you want to learn about child centre play
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  therapy. So what I wanted to share with
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  you guys and the the standout message and I'm going to unpack
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  it a lot more in next weeks episode, but the standout
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  message was definitely around. What does the play mean?
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  There was so many reflections and questions and conversations
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  around, but can't I just ask, I'm wondering if you're sad
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  right now. I'm wondering if you want to
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  play right now like these kind of I statements, statements that
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  are coming from the perspective of the practitioner.
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  Lots of those conversations around just really understanding
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  that when we're talking about connecting with kids, success,
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  I, I would argue successfully, it really requires us to unlearn
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  any of those approaches where we ask questions to kids or we talk
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  to kids verbally, which is really hard.
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  It's a very big transition, right?
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  But it's understanding that that prefrontal cortex, that part of
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  the brain that requires children to connect words to their
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  feelings and their experiences is still developing.
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  So it's not, it's not even fully there.
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  It's not fully even online. So you're asking children to
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  answer things that they don't necessarily have an answer to.
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  And so then we often find depending on their background,
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  say high compliance, where they're going to give you
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  potentially the answers that they think you want because they
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  want to keep you happy, etcetera, etcetera.
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  So it was really about so many of those practitioners I've
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  connected with this week, giving them a different perspective to
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  say, talking to adults. It's play for kids.
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  So if we really want to understand and really hear
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  children, we have to stop talking to kids.
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  We have to let them play. And our job as the adults is to
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  understand what they're playing out and to support them through
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  that. Instead of asking questions,
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  giving them suggestions, having games for them to play.
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  Like none of that hits the mark in terms of what children need
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  to communicate. So it really was some very often
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  times challenging conversations around the fact that children
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  are playing every day and communicating to us every day
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  through play. It's just our job to be able to
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  understand and interpret that. So I say all behaviour is
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  communication. I've said that before and I'll
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  say it again. And So what we often find when
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  we're talking about kids with challenging or naughty
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  behaviours is that they have used up every other tool in
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  their toolkit and they've gotten to the point where they're like,
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  I've got nothing else left. This is all I've got is these
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  outbursts, meltdowns, expressions of frustration and
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  anger because no one's listening to me.
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  And so understanding that behaviour is actually them
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  talking to us. So I say to parents, children
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  are discussing in therapy, you know, these things or these
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  issues. They may not have said a single
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  word in the playroom, but they've talked through their
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  play. They've done that and helped me
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  understand immensely what's going on in their world not
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  using a single word. So anyone that is feeling, I
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  guess I don't know, I don't know what message I want to send out
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  in this space today. Because it really was about
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  giving practitioners another lens this week to see children's
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  behaviour as being them trying to tell us a message or
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  communicate to us, as opposed to them trying to be manipulative,
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  trying to be naughty, trying to be disruptive.
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  The other part of the conversations that we've been
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  having this week and especially for folk in Victoria.
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  So if you're a listener in Victoria, you guys are at the
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  epicentre of what we are now seeing in the research of over
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  3000 studies now of what we are seeing in the research around
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  what the impact of those COVID lockdowns have had on the mental
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  health of children. So I think giving that
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  information, the feedback that I was getting in the training was
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  that they hadn't heard some of this information before and how
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  grateful they were to hear it. Because I think that there is a
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  strong pathologizing. I'm saying this from my
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  perspective, this is just my opinion.
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  I think there is definitely a high pathologizing of children's
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  behaviours towards diagnosis of ADHD or autism at the moment,
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  rather than looking holistically at all of the factors involved
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  with their presentation, which include for those babies born
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  between 2020 and 2022, the impact of COVID lockdowns.
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  The neuroscience doesn't lie, you guys.
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  The neuroscience MRI studies in the last two years have shown us
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  that babies born during that time had smaller amygdalas,
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  smaller or reduced size of hippocampus and also this white
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  brain matter that they've now identified in the babies born
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  during COVID. So we're not just talking about
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  kids choosing to be naughty or difficult, but we are working
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  with a different population of kids.
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  So I feel like that has been a really rewarding part of doing
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  the training this week of being able to share some of that
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  information, normalise it, but also I guess address the fact
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  that we as an adult population, as a parent population, are also
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  heavily traumatised by everything we went through in
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  2020 and 2022. It has now been identified as a
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  mass trauma event, yes, traumatic event.
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  So this isn't just individualised to certain
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  families or certain areas. So we need to as adults be
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  taking care of ourselves, getting psychological support,
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  connecting with our community and really normalising the
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  stress and anxiety that parents are feeling right now because
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  that is all of us collectively. I just spent the beginning of
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  this episode talking about how freaking unhinged my day was.
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  Like that is, if that's not an indicator of all of us just
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  clinging on by thread, I don't know what is.
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  I want to cut this short because this was just a hello.
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  I promise my listeners I haven't forgotten about you.
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  I am so grateful that you guys are still listening.
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  This is episode 41, so 42. Next week I am travelling to
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  Newcastle. I was like what am I doing next
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  week? Oh my God, I'm travelling to
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  Newcastle on Friday to Monday, so fingers crossed I will get
• 15:12
  the podcast out with that episode talking about really
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  understanding what kids are communicating through play.
• 15:17
  Not just themes and stages of play, but how do we really
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  understand what it is and why play is the answer in terms of
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  really getting to the heart of their communication?
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  And why it's actually our responsibility as adults to put
• 15:31
  our stuff aside and actually unlearn some of the things we've
• 15:34
  maybe been taught previously and learn how to actually hear them
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  because that's that's the gift, right?
• 15:41
  That's that's what's important. Hey, the other thing I want to
• 15:44
  say which you know kind of fits with this episode because it's a
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  short 1 today if. You have a.
• 15:49
  Question that you would like me to answer.
• 15:53
  We have had our very first listener email question and I
• 15:57
  was beyond excited. You guys like, I love this.
• 16:00
  I want to be able to interact with our listeners.
• 16:02
  So if you have a question for me, I want to do like AQ and a
• 16:06
  session. And there's no questions off
• 16:08
  limits. Like send me any question that
• 16:11
  you would like and I will check in with you to make sure that
• 16:15
  you're OK with me reading it out in that Q&A episode.
• 16:19
  But please, please, please email us if you've got a child, send a
• 16:23
  play therapy question that you would like to get an answer from
• 16:27
  me as somebody in this podcaster space.
• 16:30
  I would love to do that. So we're going to put our email
• 16:33
  address that you can reach us on in the notes of this episode so
• 16:37
  that you can reach out to us by email and ask the questions.
• 16:42
  We'd love to hear from you. You know, you guys, you know the
• 16:47
  drill. You can catch us on the socials,
• 16:49
  so you can find us on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.
• 16:53
  You can find us on Apple, Spotify, and wherever you get
• 16:57
  your good podcasts. We've got our conference coming
• 16:59
  up in October, you guys with me and Jodie Mullen.
• 17:01
  I can't freaking wait. It's going to be amazing and
• 17:06
  join our community. We've got our free circle
• 17:07
  subscription for anyone who would like to join us.
• 17:10
  So we'll put the link in the notes to this episode as well.
• 17:12
  If you would like to join our community, but please go well,
• 17:16
  look after yourselves and each other.
• 17:17
  I'm going to order my dinner, Oh my gosh, and do our final, my
• 17:21
  final day of training tomorrow. I am just so, so grateful.
• 17:24
  I've just had the best time. I've had the best week, but also
• 17:28
  I'm buggered so I'm going to go. Thanks so much for listening.
• 17:31
  Big love to all of you and I will catch you next week either
• 17:35
  in Newcastle or Brisbane. Who knows you'll you'll find me
• 17:38
  somewhere next week. I will see you soon.
• 17:40
  Bye for now. Bye.
• 17:44
  Thank you so much for being here for another episode of The Play
• 17:47
  Therapy Circle. If anything resonated with you
• 17:50
  today, I'd love it if you could follow the podcast, share it
• 17:54
  with a colleague, or leave a short review.
• 17:57
  It really helps others find our circle.
• 17:59
  And if you have a topic or question you'd love me to.
• 18:02
  Explore. I'd love to hear from you.
• 18:04
  This space is for you and I wanted to feel like a
• 18:07
  conversation. Until next time, take care of
• 18:11
  yourself and remember you belong here.