Latest / Rise & Realign: Conversations for the Sensitive Soul / Ep 4 | Seeing with New Eyes: Rising Above Old Patterns

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Ep 4 | Seeing with New Eyes: Rising Above Old Patterns · Rise & Realign: Conversations for the Sensitive Soul

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Welcome to Rise and Realign, conversations for
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the sensitive soul. I'm Melissa, and the space
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is for those of us who feel deeply, love fiercely,
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and sense the world in ways that are hard to
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explain, but impossible to ignore. Here, we honor
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your sensitivity as a strength, not something
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to fix. That's certainly a beautiful, you know,
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reflection for us to even start with, you know,
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because certainly being somebody fascinated with
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the mind and, you know, the mental health field,
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there often is that approach, right? That there's
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something wrong with us. There's something to
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fix. And that's one perspective that many people
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do live by and also judge others from, right?
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Like, oh, there's something wrong with them.
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But really, it comes down to a lack of understanding.
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When we don't understand ourselves, and when
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we've been surrounded by others who do not understand
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themselves you know judgment just forms you know
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and i mean isn't that at the heart of why there's
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a divide right between many of us um fear gets
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tapped into right if we do not understand why
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someone else is doing what they do, believe what
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they believe, or think what they think, then
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there's a judgment that arises. And, you know,
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I don't say this from a place of judgment, just
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because it's human nature. And when we really
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understand that there are multi -dimensional
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layers to who we are as humans and having this
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human experience, but also amongst each other
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right because we're not all waking up at the
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same rate at the same pace you know in the same
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situations and I really feel like that's something
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to recognize and honor because as I am evolving
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in my human nature and my career, I certainly
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can see the women who I'm meeting with, I see
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where they are coming from. I see where they're
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even experiencing their reality because I've
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been there, right? But when we're not evolving
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and rising up out of those old patterns, we're
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not able to see the patterns that we're living
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in. Um, this really speaks to one of the first
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things that I teach, um, when I am meeting with
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a new client who, you know, at this point in
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my career is primarily sensitive, empathic and
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heart centered women, right? Those who care so
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deeply about others and often are putting everyone
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else before themselves. Um, And that's certainly
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something that I don't judge because I've lived
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it. I've been there. I've done that. You know,
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I am raised from a family who that's what, that's
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what you do. You love deeply, you're loyal and
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you care about your family and you put them before
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yourself. But my own awakening journey 17 years
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ago, you know, first started helping me to see
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with new eyes. And what do I mean when I say
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that? Well, when we're living in the patterns,
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the conditioning, right, the ancestral and heritage
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that we've been born into, we're living at that
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level. That's all we can see. You know, sometimes
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I talk about it like, you know, imagine a high
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rise building. Well, we're all being born in
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on that. ground level, right? And so that's all
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we can see. But it's important that as we move
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up in our level of understanding and our levels
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of consciousness, so say we move up to the next
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level of that high -rise building, well, now
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we can see from a new vantage point. Now we have
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the opportunity to see the patterns that not
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only others are still living in, but where we
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also were living. And maybe we still are because
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it's not like when we, you know, evolve to the
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next level, we don't ever repeat an old pattern
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because that is actually part of the spiral,
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right? That evolutionary process of growth. Because
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we need to be revisiting those old patterns so
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that we can... respond in a new way and put into
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practice our new understanding and that brings
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so much wisdom that's really important for us
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to understand and to again honor others where
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they are on their path. So I just want to speak
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to You know, all the amazing women who I have
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the pleasure and the honor of meeting with, whether
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they are coming to me because they are seeking
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some assistance, you know, from me, whether that
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was as a holistic psychotherapist or, you know,
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now within the Realign journey that I offer,
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which is as a spiral guide. It's as, you know,
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the creator of Heart Wisdom Realignment. that
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has been created from my own evolutionary process,
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right? So it's not something that I can take
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credit for in the sense of, well, I did this,
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right? It's more of an honoring of like, okay,
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this is what I've lived through and this is what
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I can see from the patterns that highly sensitive
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women, right? And again, I'm talking to the roughly
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20 % of the population who have this very normal
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yet invisible sensory processing sensitivity
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trait. So when we're talking, we not only take
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in five times more stimuli in the most common
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five senses, right? We actually are taking it
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in from the 30 plus senses. on a deeper level
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because of our more finely tuned central nervous
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system because of the uniqueness to our neuroanatomy
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and this is truly a gift of sensory intelligence
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and this is not something that Again, we weren't
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raised to understand because even the amazing
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Dr. Elaine Aron, who, you know, pioneered the
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research and the naming of this trait, sensory
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processing sensitivity, right? Like so much has
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happened since then. I mean, she introduced this
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over 30 years ago. I mean, that's... amazing
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to even consider, right? Like 30 years ago, she
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introduced us to the world. And at the same time
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it was being introduced. in over a hundred species
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and so again that speaks to the synchronicity
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right the universal orchestration of all things
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that are happening and unfolding in our universe
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and something to really take note of right like
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it is meant to to be a gift to nurture to unwrap
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to rewrite the old programs um that we grew up
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um carrying with us right i mean so many incredible
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women who i meet with who are super women you
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know like all that they consider and care about
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and do for their families, right? For their careers,
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you know, all the things that they're holding
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together. It is amazing. And it has gone so under
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acknowledged, you know, and unseen. It's as if,
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you know, these women, and again, women are my
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audience, but there's also highly sensitive men
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who are carrying their load as well. And I really
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want to invite you into this presence with me
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of you don't need to try so hard. You really
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can pause and breathe and connect with your heart.
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with your breath, with your body in a new way,
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and really release. Release all of the stress
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and tension that just repeats itself. It just
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builds within the body. And again, stress is
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not something to fear, but it's certainly something
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to understand that there needs to be that healthy
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oscillation between the stressful experiences
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and the restful experiences, right? Like, and
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this is an invitation for you to tune in, you
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know, even just reflect on your day. Okay. How
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much of today was focused and dedicated to your
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wellbeing? You as the sensitive, deeply caring,
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nurturing, loving, empathic woman that you are.
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And really, like, consider how many moments there
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are in a day and how many you actually gave to
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yourself. I absolutely encourage you, if you're
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not, to start your day your way. Your way, what's
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truly best for you. You know, are you connecting
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with your breath, your body, the sun, you know,
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the earth? Are you tuned in to what your body
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is communicating to you, right? Because signs
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and symptoms from our body are not an indication
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of malfunction in the way that many of us raised
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with a conventional medicine approach, you know,
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have learned. There really is. a deeper intelligence
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within our body and within the communication
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that the symptoms are showing us so this is really
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an opportunity to again reel things in for you
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and be curious about are you really taking care
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of you because when we continue to put other
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people before our own needs It's harming us.
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Because our needs, our bodies, right? If we're
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not tending to our body's needs, our own needs,
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if we're not listening, if we're not tuning in,
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then we're giving to others from a very depleted
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state. And we're giving an example that I certainly
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don't want to repeat in my children. And I certainly
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have the opportunity because I have a young one
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again. He's about to be 13. But I have the opportunity
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to raise him in this awareness that, you know,
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his needs matter. He needs to be tuning into
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his body. He needs to be aware of, is he saying
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yes to a friend or a family member, you know,
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out of some sense of obligation or his deep empathy,
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you know, not wanting somebody else to hurt,
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right? I am helping him see that that's not his
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job. Just like it wasn't my job. But that's what
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I learned to do. And I feel like I have the most
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amazing mom on the planet and I'm so grateful
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for her. And I can see that I carried forward
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that conditioning, that behavior, that for me
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to be, you know, a kind and caring, loving woman.
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It meant I needed to meet other people's needs.
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And because I'm highly sensitive, it also meant
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that I could sense the needs of others before
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they even recognize them. Boy, was that a wake
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-up call when I realized that that was really
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not helpful at all. When we are anticipating
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the needs of others, when we are sensing what
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somebody else might need, we're actually preventing
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them from becoming aware of their own needs and
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advocating for themselves. So what I used to
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think I was doing from a place of love, right?
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From a place of kindness and caring and dedication
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and loyalty. I learned was actually inhibiting
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their development fully, right? And I have amazing
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children as well. Of course, I'm their mom, so
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I see their beauty and their light, but I also
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see how that also gave them the example. you
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know, meet somebody else's need before your own.
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And, you know, why we do what we do, again, is
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multi -dimensional, multi -layered, right? It's
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not only our conditioning, it's not only you
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know, the environment that we're raised in and
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what our intentions are, right? We also come
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into this world with our own soul blueprint,
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like our own soul curriculum, so to speak. And
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so this is why I say judgment is something that
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we really want to take a step back from because
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I have compassion for myself. In the sense of,
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yep, that's the example I set for my older children
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who are now adults and married. And if they engage
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in that same behavior, I can come from a new
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perspective, right? And say, yeah, I've really
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realized that that was not healthy or helpful
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for me. you know, and I can support them through
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making the changes if they feel it's necessary.
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But this is that high rise building that I'm
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talking about. When we're on one of those levels,
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somebody else who's on a higher level can see
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more than we can. But it's not one of us is better
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than the other. Because as I mentioned earlier,
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this waking up process It's not like I was chosen
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and somebody else wasn't. It's really about us
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waking up and remembering. And what that looks
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like is different for all of us. You know, and
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we don't know what we may have set forth before
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we did come into this lifetime. Which again,
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I want to assure you that when I lived on that
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ground level, I never understood. could not understand
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when other people would talk about if they had
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a past life or talked about their soul. Like
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I really want to be honest and clear with you
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that I woke up and I've been waking up more and
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more and I am so deeply grateful and honored
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to be on this path. that it fills me with so
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much love and light and appreciation that I want
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to be present with those who are also curious,
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who are also waking up in a sense to, well, what
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does that mean? I've been conditioned or how
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can you do that? You know, not judge, not blame
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a parent, you know, whatever it may be. Like
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I really want to be clear that it's something
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that happens through us. It's something that
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happens for us. And there really is something
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so much greater than our human mind can comprehend.
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But this universe is truly amazing in how it
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orchestrates things. I didn't have a specific
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topic for this podcast and I record it though,
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you know, each week and I had the recording in
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my schedule, but there was something unexpected
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that showed up and that's exactly how the universe
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works. right like we on that ground level understanding
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of our human nature are like oh well i need to
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put something in my schedule i need to plan to
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do this i need to do that and i'm not saying
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all people do that right but a lot of us live
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our lives around a calendar and a schedule but
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when we understand that the universe works in
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live time right that the unexpected happens and
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so today I received notification from a lovely
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woman who I was a guest on her podcast. And so
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when that came through, I was reminded of our
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conversation. And it was so delightful. And it
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very much focused on the human design system
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and how human design came into my life like 12
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and a half years ago. how it came into hers and
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how we use it to understand ourselves, right?
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And how we use it also, both of us do, to help
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others see that there's nothing wrong with you.
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There's nothing to fix. But what we can adjust
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is our perspective. How we see ourselves and
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others and the universe, how we understand why
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we're doing what we're doing on a day -to -day
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basis. Because when we have something that we
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can believe in, when we have something that we
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can trust, something that we can rely on, life
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does flow so much easier. And it's way easier.
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to be on the restful side instead of the stressful
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side. But I want to be clear, right? Like we
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don't just live on the restful side either when
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we're more awake and aware and living our authentic
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and true path, right? Living in alignment doesn't
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preclude us from experiencing something that
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may be frustrating, right? Like, because those
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Those are clues like, oh, I'm learning something
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in this experience. You know, those sensations
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become our greater teachers. We tend to appreciate
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them more of like, ah, OK, it was time for me
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to realize that. All right. It took that situation
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to help me realize that. I'm really grateful.
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So I'm realizing that tomorrow is our. um, you
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know, American holiday of Thanksgiving and, um,
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you know, what that even means to me has changed
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so much from the way I was raised as a kid. I
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mean, it's certainly a day of Thanksgiving and
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to, uh, focus on family time and friendship,
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you know, relaxing, having fun, being in the
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sun. Um, But for me, every day has things that
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I'm grateful for. And I really encourage you
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to see how you're doing in that area. You know,
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every day, where are you giving thanks? Are you
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appreciating the sun? Right? Are you appreciating
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your home? Are you appreciating? the vocation
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that you have? Are you appreciating your family,
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your friends, right? Because no matter what we're
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living through, even when it's one of the greatest
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challenges of our life, there's always something
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that we can connect to that we are actually grateful
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for. There always is. So I invite you to connect.
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With this moment, right, hand on your heart and
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just take a nice deep breath in through your
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nose and then a second inhale through your nose
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and then exhale out your mouth nice and slow
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and just relax into the moment and just speak
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aloud. What are you grateful for? The more you
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tune in, to that frequency of gratitude, of appreciation,
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the more you draw more experiences and opportunities
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to see the good in you, in others, in the world
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around you, and to really just appreciate the
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life that you've been given to live. Because
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you're here for a reason and it's important.
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Your voice matters. Your feelings have value.
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So I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate
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you. I appreciate that you're listening to this
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podcast and you're allowing, you know, this information
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to be received. to allow it to shift how you're
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thinking and feeling about yourself and others.
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Because remember, every one of us has a path
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to walk. We all have unique challenges, gifts,
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and opportunities. We don't all choose to go
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through life celebrating our gifts some of us
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have a really hard time focusing on our gifts
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and focusing on the good and what we appreciate
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but the more each one of us who can do it do
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it the more we influence the collective and others
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so know that you matter greatly your ability
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to pause and appreciate And to connect with that
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sense of gratitude in your heart, that ripples
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out. It touches more people than you'll ever
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know. So I wish you a wonderful rest of your
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day, an amazing day. Tomorrow, if you're celebrating
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Thanksgiving with friends and family, you know,
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laugh, have fun, hug. And if you find yourself
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maybe doing something alone or different, know
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that that's okay too. Not that you need my permission.
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I'm just acknowledging that sometimes being alone
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is when we connect more deeply with our true
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self. And then we wake up. and cultivate it more
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in our everyday life. So till next time, I wish
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you the best, big hugs and lots of love.