Latest / The Steve & Jeff Show / Perma-Ace

Transcript

Perma-Ace · The Steve & Jeff Show

• 0:02
  SPEAKER_01: Are you still wasting all your time looking for a partner with nothing to show for it?
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_01: Do you envy your asexual friends because their days are not consumed by thoughts of sex?
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_01: You can ease the pain of trying to hook up with a simple pill we call permaace.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_01: Perma ACE takes away your desire to hook up.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_01: It frees up your time and your mind so you can finally spend time on self-improvement.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_01: Become a tennis star, a martial arts expert, even a commercial voiceover professional.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_01: Wait.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_01: Uh anyway, listen to some of these satisfied customers.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: My job is so demanding that I never had time for dating.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: I used to hate that, but now permace lets me work 24-7 without a thought about dating.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: I'm due for promotion soon.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks, Permace.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_01: My spouse was so demanding.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: I used to resent him, but now we both take permace and we get along just fine.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_01: I used to hate everyone I saw out on dates.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_01: I still do, but with permace, it's now more of a general dislike.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_01: Find out for yourself.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_01: Take the 42-day permaace challenge.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_01: Use permaace every day for six weeks, and if you still feel a libido, we'll send you your money back.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_01: So what do you have to lose other than a string of dreadful dates and hours wasted thinking about sex?
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_01: Set your mind and your time free with permace.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_01: Use of permace by some persons can cause a dangerous condition called automotive dysphagia.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_01: Stop use of the product if you feel a physical attraction to mid-60s cars.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_01: Do not use if you are currently on MOLLE because, come on.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_01: Possible side effects include sudden death, which could be a permanent condition.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_01: Some patients in clinical studies developed an obsession with baking or with PBS documentaries.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_01: Not recommended for patients over 60.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_01: You know why, right?
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_01: Permace may be less effective if used in combination with THC and smooth jazz.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_01: So try permease and take hooking up worries off the hook.