Latest / I Said No Gifts! A comedy interview podcast with Bridger Winegar / Bryan Safi Returns to Disobey Bridger Again
Transcript
- 0:08Speaker 1: And I invited you here. I thought I made myself
- 0:14Speaker 1: perfectly clear. When you're a guest to my home, you
- 0:21Speaker 1: gotta come to me empty. And I said, no, guests,
- 0:27Speaker 1: your presences presence and I already had too much stuff.
- 0:35Speaker 2: So how do you dare to surbey me? Welcome to
- 0:50Speaker 2: I said, no gift temperature wine, girl, we're here. I
- 0:54Speaker 2: was just told that this episode is coming out of July. Second.
- 0:58Speaker 2: It's fourth of July weekend. I'm waving my flag. I'm
- 1:03Speaker 2: falling into a deep depression. This is I think I've
- 1:06Speaker 2: talked about this on the podcast before. Historically, the most
- 1:10Speaker 2: depressing day of the year for me is the fourth
- 1:12Speaker 2: of July. Something happens to my body, something happens to
- 1:16Speaker 2: the chemicals in my body. I'm gonna bottom out. Let's
- 1:20Speaker 2: see what else. I actually planned to open this on camera,
- 1:24Speaker 2: just to give myself something to do. I could have
- 1:25Speaker 2: done this before the episode. But listen to that. This
- 1:29Speaker 2: is a diet coke. I know they don't want me
- 1:31Speaker 2: to tell you that. Okay, I've had my sip of
- 1:35Speaker 2: diet coke. I'm losing control. Last night, I absolutely lost control.
- 1:40Speaker 2: I mixed one granola with another type of granola and
- 1:44Speaker 2: it was a bomb. It was a huge bomb. That
- 1:47Speaker 2: was my treat for the evening. And then I'm just
- 1:50Speaker 2: sitting there chewing through this granola, trying to enjoy a
- 1:53Speaker 2: television show. Is there business to deal? Oh? I mean actually,
- 1:59Speaker 2: speaking of the we're back, we keep falling off the
- 2:02Speaker 2: train and getting back on the Little House on the
- 2:03Speaker 2: Prairie train. Last night we watched we got into an
- 2:06Speaker 2: episode where Charles and Laura teamed up to kill a
- 2:10Speaker 2: horse and they succeeded. And we have Patreon. I'm gonna
- 2:17Speaker 2: do it. I'm gonna really laser focus right now and
- 2:19Speaker 2: try to promote the Patreon like someone who wants you
- 2:22Speaker 2: to get on it. Patreon dot com slash I said,
- 2:25Speaker 2: no gifts, bonus episodes. You're gonna hear a bonus episode
- 2:29Speaker 2: with Ellis, with my Mom, with Jim my boyfriend, plus
- 2:33Speaker 2: past guests, new guests. I'm posting just videos that I
- 2:38Speaker 2: probably shouldn't be posting online. Nothing pornographic, yet we were
- 2:43Speaker 2: doing all kinds of things. It's a wonderful time. It's
- 2:46Speaker 2: a great way to support the podcast. That was a
- 2:48Speaker 2: pretty good way to promote the Patreon. So get on
- 2:52Speaker 2: do that. You owe me and I think I mean no,
- 2:56Speaker 2: I don't have any other business. I saw Disclosure Day
- 2:58Speaker 2: over the weekend. I knew there was going to be
- 3:02Speaker 2: a problem with the Cgidar. I didn't realize they were
- 3:05Speaker 2: also gonna have a problem with the CGI fox and
- 3:07Speaker 2: a CGI bird. It's essentially the cast of Zootopia has
- 3:11Speaker 2: entered this movie, and the bird and Chance Emily Blunt
- 3:16Speaker 2: and kind of bewitches her. The disappointment for me at
- 3:22Speaker 2: the end of that movie is I was hoping the
- 3:24Speaker 2: alien was going to ask to be the new weather lady.
- 3:27Speaker 2: Didn't happen. I've done it all. I've talked about everything.
- 3:32Speaker 2: I've done beautiful self promotion. You're trapped with me. Here,
- 3:37Speaker 2: let's get into the podcast. I adore today's guest. I'm
- 3:40Speaker 2: so glad he's here. It's Brian Sofy. Brian, welcome back
- 3:43Speaker 2: to I said no.
- 3:43Speaker 3: Gifts, thank you, I a few things. I am so
- 3:47Speaker 3: happy to see you.
- 3:48Speaker 2: I'm so happy to see you.
- 3:50Speaker 3: You're simply the greatest. No you are. You put me
- 3:52Speaker 3: at ease. Honestly, I'm likeke practically except maybe Little House
- 3:57Speaker 3: on the Prairie does any of that Because I got
- 4:00Speaker 3: to say First of all, I was just in Texas
- 4:03Speaker 3: visiting my family. My parents are on the Michael Landon train.
- 4:07Speaker 3: They're still not just Little House Highway to Heaven.
- 4:10Speaker 2: Highway to Heaven. Rokhu's getting the exclusives that people want.
- 4:17Speaker 3: Absolutely, and I have to say, it had been a
- 4:20Speaker 3: minute since I'd seen Little House on the Prairie. I
- 4:23Speaker 3: cannot get enough of missus Olsen.
- 4:25Speaker 2: Oh, I can't get enough Nellie Olsen. Of course.
- 4:28Speaker 3: Yeah, Nelly is straight up the worst person. And you
- 4:31Speaker 3: know what I love about her. She wears it on
- 4:33Speaker 3: her face.
- 4:33Speaker 2: She lets you know, yes, she knows exactly who she is.
- 4:36Speaker 3: She does, and she wears it and she delivers at
- 4:39Speaker 3: every turn.
- 4:40Speaker 2: Criminally underused. I would say, I.
- 4:42Speaker 3: Can't believe that. I gotta be honest with you. She
- 4:45Speaker 3: to me, is just as valuable as anyone else in
- 4:48Speaker 3: that show.
- 4:48Speaker 2: More. They should have killed off the mom season one
- 4:51Speaker 2: and just brought Nelly into kind of push people around.
- 4:53Speaker 3: And I got to tell you, it really drives me
- 4:54Speaker 3: crazy when the mom gets the best of missus Olsen.
- 4:58Speaker 2: Oh, the mom doesn't deserve to get the upper hand
- 5:01Speaker 2: on missus Olsen.
- 5:02Speaker 3: Missus Olsen works also another person who works so hard
- 5:05Speaker 3: at being the most obnoxious person on the planet, but
- 5:09Speaker 3: you got to give it up for she scheams. Oh
- 5:11Speaker 3: she's so fat. She gets humiliated in church every week.
- 5:16Speaker 2: She's ripping off customers.
- 5:18Speaker 3: She's awful. I just watched an episode actually where she
- 5:23Speaker 3: was what happens. Oh she meant to print in the
- 5:26Speaker 3: newspaper ten percent off on the store. Oh no, those
- 5:31Speaker 3: little twerps over a little house in the prayer thought
- 5:36Speaker 3: it would be funny to add a zero to the
- 5:38Speaker 3: ten boys. So everyone one hundred percent off. So everyone
- 5:41Speaker 3: lines up at the store and missus Olsen is like,
- 5:44Speaker 3: oh my god, look at how this promotion worked. And
- 5:47Speaker 3: everyone comes in and just starts taking everything. And then
- 5:50Speaker 3: she looks in the paper and sees it's a hundred
- 5:51Speaker 3: percent off. And I thought to myself, Hey, we now
- 5:54Speaker 3: have discovered that everyone on the show is immoral.
- 5:56Speaker 2: Oh of course, yeah, they will take advantage of a
- 5:58Speaker 2: small business owner.
- 5:59Speaker 3: Correct. It was honestly, I really felt for her, and
- 6:02Speaker 3: then she was humilated in church because it was her
- 6:04Speaker 3: get back, because she had been printing gossip in the
- 6:06Speaker 3: newspaper about other people in the.
- 6:08Speaker 2: Town, entertaining people.
- 6:10Speaker 3: I literally thought to myself, finally something to do. Yeah,
- 6:14Speaker 3: that's all we need.
- 6:15Speaker 2: Also, gossip is a great thing for protection. It lets
- 6:18Speaker 2: us know who's bad around town. Trying to stay away
- 6:21Speaker 2: from purely a public service that she was providing. She
- 6:25Speaker 2: gets ripped off, she gets her business ripped off. She's
- 6:28Speaker 2: a girl boss, that's right, and she gets destroyed by
- 6:31Speaker 2: other women.
- 6:32Speaker 3: Honestly, I would love I'm having the time of my
- 6:35Speaker 3: life right now. I would love for missus Olsen to Honestly,
- 6:40Speaker 3: she shouldn't even be a guest. She should have a
- 6:42Speaker 3: podcast and we could go for a gossip and talk
- 6:45Speaker 3: about local crime.
- 6:48Speaker 2: I think missus Olsen was justified in killing at least
- 6:51Speaker 2: one member of the town. That should have happened.
- 6:53Speaker 3: I couldn't agree more. And she should have gotten off,
- 6:55Speaker 3: you know what I mean. It should have been aokay
- 6:58Speaker 3: that she did it.
- 6:59Speaker 2: Yes, I mean they basically paint her as someone who
- 7:01Speaker 2: like is as evil as a murderer. Yeah, why not
- 7:04Speaker 2: just have her killed one person?
- 7:05Speaker 3: Could not agree more.
- 7:06Speaker 2: They have people drifting through the town all the time,
- 7:08Speaker 2: somebody who wouldn't be missed, you know, just like let
- 7:10Speaker 2: her kill them. Yeah, she's basically abusing her husband yes,
- 7:15Speaker 2: that's not a healthy relationship.
- 7:16Speaker 3: But anyway, Zero, I do have a couple of questions
- 7:19Speaker 3: for you. Was one of the granola's purely Elizabeth? Because
- 7:26Speaker 3: I will shoot through the roof it was.
- 7:28Speaker 2: Now this is an interesting thing though, because what kind
- 7:31Speaker 2: of got me on my recent granola train? Okay, my
- 7:34Speaker 2: sister said, have you tried pure Elizabeth peanut butter cookie?
- 7:37Speaker 3: Oh? It's pure Elizabeth?
- 7:38Speaker 2: Okay, Oh wait, what did you see?
- 7:40Speaker 3: I said, purely? But maybe it's pure I don't, Well.
- 7:42Speaker 2: It should be.
- 7:43Speaker 3: It's Elizabeth.
- 7:44Speaker 2: Yeah, strictly Elizabeth granola.
- 7:48Speaker 3: So how was this peanut butter granola?
- 7:50Speaker 2: It was delicious, it was so good it was, but
- 7:54Speaker 2: it was essentially just candy, you know. It's like I
- 7:57Speaker 2: think there's like a lot of sugar. It's like it
- 7:59Speaker 2: was wonderful. So then I started looking for other granolas
- 8:01Speaker 2: that were adjacent but weren't maybe as cookie, yes, And
- 8:06Speaker 2: I found Trader Jose peanut butter protein granola.
- 8:09Speaker 3: That sounds pretty good.
- 8:10Speaker 2: Delicious, not too sweet.
- 8:11Speaker 3: Yeah that's the key.
- 8:13Speaker 2: And so that then I mix it with a chocolate
- 8:15Speaker 2: coffee granola from Trader Jose.
- 8:17Speaker 3: Chocolate coffee Grana. Is it is it? Does it look
- 8:20Speaker 3: like chocolate? Is it okay? That sounds good?
- 8:22Speaker 2: That was the bad element? But why are you so
- 8:26Speaker 2: anti purely or anti purely Elizabeth beyond why.
- 8:30Speaker 3: The last two times I've had it there has been
- 8:34Speaker 3: something off about it felt too chemically, or it felt
- 8:36Speaker 3: it tastes a little almost turned or burnt or something,
- 8:42Speaker 3: and I really it just hit me the wrong way.
- 8:45Speaker 3: And I guess my problem with it was none of
- 8:48Speaker 3: it felt or tasted pure or tasted like there was
- 8:52Speaker 3: an additive in there that's almost maybe it was a
- 8:55Speaker 3: monk fruit, Oh, interesting, stevia, something there that I really
- 9:02Speaker 3: towers right exactly, And to me, I thought, you know what, Liz,
- 9:07Speaker 3: you're Elizabeth when you earn it, You're Liz when you
- 9:11Speaker 3: doubt No.
- 9:12Speaker 2: I see her, I now now that I'm aware of
- 9:14Speaker 2: the brand, I see her, and I assume she's a
- 9:17Speaker 2: real person. All of her flavors and there are so
- 9:21Speaker 2: many that it's almost like yogurt land adjacent, where you're like, well,
- 9:24Speaker 2: I know that the flavors not it couldn't possibly be real.
- 9:28Speaker 2: So I wonder if there's a lot of that sort
- 9:30Speaker 2: of food science magic.
- 9:32Speaker 3: It does seem to have a cinnamon happiting a blueberry moment,
- 9:34Speaker 3: she does delve into all the yogurt flavors, right.
- 9:39Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, I just mix some oats and peanut butter
- 9:42Speaker 2: together and burn it. I'm ready to go.
- 9:46Speaker 3: Is the chocolate one good on its own?
- 9:48Speaker 2: I don't think it's that great?
- 9:49Speaker 3: Okay?
- 9:49Speaker 2: It was almost basically what I was trying to do
- 9:52Speaker 2: is I've got the chocolate, I've got to move through this,
- 9:54Speaker 2: and that seems like a decent combination that I think
- 9:57Speaker 2: is kind of a phony flavor. Yeah, and it doesn't
- 9:59Speaker 2: make any sense. And I do think it has caffeine
- 10:01Speaker 2: in it, which is a weird thing to be eating
- 10:03Speaker 2: at like ten thirty at night.
- 10:05Speaker 3: Can I ask her, like, truly the dumbest question that's
- 10:08Speaker 3: ever please, you know, like chocolate covered espresso bean?
- 10:14Speaker 2: Yes?
- 10:15Speaker 3: Do those have caffeine? Oh?
- 10:17Speaker 2: Yeah they must, okay.
- 10:19Speaker 3: Because people aren't eating those during the day, are they?
- 10:23Speaker 3: To me? It's an after dark tree.
- 10:25Speaker 2: Yeah, that's not something you like wake up in the
- 10:27Speaker 2: morning and throw a few in your mouth and get going, right.
- 10:30Speaker 2: It is like, uh, yeah, it's a.
- 10:32Speaker 3: It's an adult dessert.
- 10:34Speaker 2: Totally interesting. I think I've always felt like they're they're
- 10:37Speaker 2: just kind of a bad idea because you can't eat
- 10:39Speaker 2: that many of those. No, and when you're eating that
- 10:41Speaker 2: type of thing, you want at least a handful. Yeah,
- 10:44Speaker 2: to eat a whole handful of espresso beans feels dangerous. Yeah,
- 10:48Speaker 2: so I can eat one. Yeah, but then it's like this.
- 10:51Speaker 3: Then it's like, what are you going to do? It
- 10:52Speaker 3: would take a year to get through one carton of those, right.
- 10:57Speaker 2: Yeah, just it was like a pill at that point.
- 10:59Speaker 2: There's Yeah, I think in theory we were on board
- 11:02Speaker 2: with it, but no, one's just buying a bag of
- 11:05Speaker 2: espresso beans.
- 11:06Speaker 3: I can see it at treator Joe's right now because
- 11:08Speaker 3: it's in the plastic square thing.
- 11:10Speaker 2: I think, yeah, totally, the little plastic thing. That's what
- 11:13Speaker 2: I get there, biscotti and yes, the hazel lut chocolate biscotti,
- 11:16Speaker 2: which are fine.
- 11:17Speaker 3: Can I be honest with you. It's a good plastic.
- 11:19Speaker 2: It is. It's an excellent plastic.
- 11:21Speaker 3: So it's sturdy, it's shapely.
- 11:24Speaker 2: The shape is kind of stackable. Yeah, I'm sure it's
- 11:29Speaker 2: loading up the food with whatever BPA microplastics.
- 11:33Speaker 3: We need credit cards essential for sure.
- 11:39Speaker 2: Yeah. Now I'm thinking the espresso beans. I bet those
- 11:42Speaker 2: are in a lot of high school secretary like the
- 11:46Speaker 2: front desk person's drawer. You can see somebody popping one
- 11:49Speaker 2: of those while dealing with high schoolers.
- 11:51Speaker 3: Absolutely, Sherry is powering. Sherry's devouring.
- 11:58Speaker 2: I'm trying to think about our elementary school secretary sort
- 12:01Speaker 2: of with the d it was.
- 12:02Speaker 3: Like it wasn't Donna, Deanna Donna.
- 12:07Speaker 2: Yeah, it was like step above all of that. Even
- 12:10Speaker 2: it was very like Madman Office.
- 12:12Speaker 3: Yes, I wish I could remember did you say Dan already?
- 12:15Speaker 2: You did, Gina. It was like the final level of
- 12:18Speaker 2: those d names. It's a shame I can't remember.
- 12:21Speaker 3: Name switched fast. I got that tell you, like all
- 12:26Speaker 3: of the school secretary names when I was growing up
- 12:28Speaker 3: were names that you do you never know. Dinosaur, It's wild.
- 12:35Speaker 3: It was such a vibe too. It was because it
- 12:37Speaker 3: really fit that right.
- 12:38Speaker 2: And now I wonder we're probably like twenty years out
- 12:41Speaker 2: from those coming back.
- 12:42Speaker 3: Probably we'll think they will like Linda.
- 12:45Speaker 2: Oh, those will feel classic like right now, like Pearl
- 12:50Speaker 2: and Hole and that sort of thing. Yeah, but Brenda
- 12:54Speaker 2: is going to come back.
- 12:55Speaker 3: I love it.
- 12:55Speaker 2: I love I love it Brenda. I love a baby Brenda.
- 12:59Speaker 3: It reminds me of nine O two one. Now, did
- 13:01Speaker 3: you get into that show?
- 13:02Speaker 1: No?
- 13:02Speaker 2: I didn't. Yeah, but Brenda, of course I'm familiar with.
- 13:05Speaker 3: Did you not get into that show? Because you were
- 13:07Speaker 3: just like maybe you were too young for me.
- 13:09Speaker 2: I think it was like I was probably just slightly
- 13:11Speaker 2: too young and family like, uh, we weren't allowed to
- 13:14Speaker 2: watch a lot of.
- 13:14Speaker 3: Things stuff like that.
- 13:15Speaker 2: Yeah, like basically anything that aired on Fox, weirdly.
- 13:18Speaker 3: Fox Trash, just what Married with Children, Melrose Place, it
- 13:25Speaker 3: was like edgy, yeah, sort of dyed, you know, blonde,
- 13:31Speaker 3: kind of roots showing TV.
- 13:33Speaker 2: But those are the ones we remember now. Obvious Peggy Bundy.
- 13:36Speaker 3: Yeah, I got it absolutely either Locker.
- 13:41Speaker 2: Think about her constantly on the way here today. Yeah,
- 13:44Speaker 2: where is she?
- 13:45Speaker 3: Good question? It has to be Malibu? Right, Oh, I'm
- 13:48Speaker 3: sure Richie Sambora.
- 13:50Speaker 2: I hope her home survived or she's gonna be running
- 13:53Speaker 2: from Mayor.
- 13:54Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 13:55Speaker 2: I wonder where he is now?
- 13:57Speaker 3: Where is he now?
- 13:58Speaker 2: I've probably gotten his wagon at it out of town.
- 14:01Speaker 3: Now I wonder if he was because you know, everyone
- 14:03Speaker 3: always thought the guy in charge probably just wanted a
- 14:07Speaker 3: show on Fox, right, And it turns out no, he
- 14:09Speaker 3: actually wanted much more than that. I wonder if this
- 14:12Speaker 3: guy just ultimately wants a show on Fox and stops.
- 14:14Speaker 2: There Spencer prep Yeah, yeah, interesting, Yeah he wants he
- 14:18Speaker 2: just wants someone to look at him, I think so,
- 14:20Speaker 2: and to pay off whatever extreme debt he's gotten himself into.
- 14:24Speaker 2: Well did you watch that show Extreme Debt?
- 14:28Speaker 3: No? No, but sure that's a good show. That would
- 14:32Speaker 3: be good.
- 14:32Speaker 2: You just want people get their car repos because.
- 14:34Speaker 3: You want to something. It's basically housewives. They just don't
- 14:38Speaker 3: say that. Yeah, it's basically everyone has smiled for bankruptcy.
- 14:43Speaker 3: Everyone is so broken and they we just made they're
- 14:48Speaker 3: lying about it, but like that's what that's what that
- 14:51Speaker 3: show is.
- 14:51Speaker 2: In the nineties, that would have been a show on
- 14:53Speaker 2: Fox called Women in the World's Worst Debt.
- 14:55Speaker 3: Yeah, yes, it would be. And now we just called
- 15:00Speaker 3: dilute antidote.
- 15:01Speaker 2: But wait, what show were you asking? If I had seen.
- 15:06Speaker 3: No idea, I have no clue.
- 15:08Speaker 2: I'm trying to like we were between Spencer Prah. I
- 15:12Speaker 2: never saw the Hills.
- 15:14Speaker 3: Yeah, I saw maybe, like I want to say, a
- 15:17Speaker 3: good like ten episodes. It wasn't anything though that I
- 15:21Speaker 3: was right, and maybe it happened to be.
- 15:23Speaker 2: On that one. I yeah, I just and he was
- 15:26Speaker 2: everyone truly hated him.
- 15:28Speaker 3: Yeah, oh yeah, no, I and I I design I'm
- 15:31Speaker 3: pretty sure, right, I think that's what he wanted.
- 15:33Speaker 2: And then the fact that anyone got on board with
- 15:35Speaker 2: him was so mind boggling to me. I just don't
- 15:37Speaker 2: understand how anything works.
- 15:39Speaker 3: Can I mention something else you talked about? Of course
- 15:43Speaker 3: I hate and am scared of and feel the worst
- 15:50Speaker 3: about myself on the fourth of July. Oh really, I
- 15:54Speaker 3: feel I'm never invited.
- 15:56Speaker 2: Oh my god, this is great to for invite.
- 16:00Speaker 3: Oh no, ever, I don't know why. It's like the
- 16:03Speaker 3: one thing that no one ever invites me to. I
- 16:05Speaker 3: have never hosted either in fairness, and I pretend I
- 16:11Speaker 3: don't care. And then I hear the fireworks. I think
- 16:16Speaker 3: to myself, I am alone for this.
- 16:22Speaker 2: You're just in an unfurnished room in the shadows.
- 16:25Speaker 3: And I am walking as fast as I can because
- 16:27Speaker 3: for some reason, the past few I have been in
- 16:28Speaker 3: New York, so undeniable, undeniable, and I walk with full
- 16:35Speaker 3: horse blinders on, because I think to myself, as long
- 16:38Speaker 3: as I don't see them, it's so sad my heart.
- 16:41Speaker 3: As long as I don't see them, I'll be Okay,
- 16:45Speaker 3: I just can't see them. I only need to hear them,
- 16:48Speaker 3: and then I'll go back to my apartment watch probably
- 16:52Speaker 3: Housewives or maybe Little house We don't.
- 16:54Speaker 2: Know, both Great American program.
- 16:58Speaker 3: Possibly depending on how broke I am eating a bowl
- 17:01Speaker 3: of purely Elizabeth we don't know. I hate it. It
- 17:04Speaker 3: makes me, nothing makes me.
- 17:05Speaker 2: Feel I think that might have something to do with mine,
- 17:09Speaker 2: because even if I do go to a party, I'm like,
- 17:11Speaker 2: a summer party is really not the sort of thing
- 17:13Speaker 2: that I can really vibe with, because I guess that's
- 17:15Speaker 2: me a deeply pale. I like, the activities aren't really
- 17:18Speaker 2: for me. The food's not for me.
- 17:20Speaker 3: I don't want to take off like my shirt.
- 17:22Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel uncomfortable in so many different ways. And
- 17:25Speaker 2: if and I do think this is probably true of
- 17:28Speaker 2: both of us. We have friends who probably aren't big
- 17:30Speaker 2: Fourth of July celebrators, so like they're not hosting as
- 17:33Speaker 2: many parties.
- 17:34Speaker 3: I guess that's what it is.
- 17:35Speaker 2: And it's the thing for me is I've determined it's
- 17:37Speaker 2: the middle of the year, so you really are then like,
- 17:40Speaker 2: oh no, what's happening? What is the last six months
- 17:44Speaker 2: led to and combined with the fireworks, sounds or all
- 17:48Speaker 2: of that. It's and you're supposed to be happy. You're
- 17:50Speaker 2: supposed to feel proud, and you're just like, I just
- 17:53Speaker 2: feel weird.
- 17:54Speaker 3: And you're supposed to be excited that summer is here.
- 17:57Speaker 3: And yeah, I actually, I mean I like summer, okay,
- 17:59Speaker 3: but I would definitely say it's my least favorite season.
- 18:03Speaker 2: Yeah, especially I don't need it in southern California. No,
- 18:06Speaker 2: I want to avoid it at all costs.
- 18:08Speaker 3: And also I don't like holidays that are necessarily associated
- 18:12Speaker 3: with getting a little wasted.
- 18:15Speaker 2: Oh yes, yeah for me. Again, I'm not getting drunk
- 18:17Speaker 2: or anything. So I'm just stone cold sober watching people
- 18:21Speaker 2: like blow their hands off, exactly what's here for me?
- 18:25Speaker 3: Right? Watching dogs pan actual?
- 18:27Speaker 2: Oh yeah, of course that's the other element of it.
- 18:30Speaker 2: I'm worried about my dog. I'm mad at people for
- 18:32Speaker 2: lighting fireworks. I'm thinking how wasteful and stupid. I'm reminded
- 18:36Speaker 2: just how kind of stupid everyone is me too. It's
- 18:40Speaker 2: a it's a bad time. Yeah, it's so I've like
- 18:44Speaker 2: started setting up some structure to avoid that stuff.
- 18:48Speaker 3: Feeling what are your structures?
- 18:51Speaker 2: Essentially just being aware it's going to happen. Yeah, making
- 18:55Speaker 2: some small plan that doesn't really have anything to do
- 18:57Speaker 2: with the holiday.
- 18:58Speaker 3: Okay, that's nice, like what when you see a movie.
- 19:00Speaker 2: Or yeah, seing a movie, getting lunch with the friends,
- 19:03Speaker 2: just something very low key. And it's nice to have
- 19:08Speaker 2: a dog because then if you aren't invited to a party,
- 19:10Speaker 2: you can say, well, I gotta say I'm with the dog.
- 19:11Speaker 3: That's true.
- 19:12Speaker 2: Also fourth of July. This is another thing. The party
- 19:15Speaker 2: happens in the middle of the day. I would rather
- 19:16Speaker 2: be at a party at night.
- 19:17Speaker 3: Me too. Always during the day, I would never, I'll
- 19:21Speaker 3: be honest, I would never have a drink during the day.
- 19:23Speaker 3: Everything about us is horrible. It ruins my day of course.
- 19:27Speaker 3: And also I don't know, there's just something about being
- 19:30Speaker 3: in the sun and talking to people and it just
- 19:34Speaker 3: is different.
- 19:35Speaker 2: It's just right. If I'm going to be like around
- 19:37Speaker 2: a swimming pool or a summer activity and want a
- 19:39Speaker 2: few close friends and we're just hanging out, I don't
- 19:41Speaker 2: want to be like performing conversation with people me neither.
- 19:44Speaker 2: That should happen in the dark.
- 19:47Speaker 3: And yet and yet here we go want to be invited,
- 19:51Speaker 3: desperate for that, desperate for that. I think people must
- 19:55Speaker 3: feel that I'm not that person, right, because they do
- 19:58Speaker 3: get invited a to other things.
- 20:01Speaker 2: See, I would invite you to my Fourth of July
- 20:02Speaker 2: party if I had one. Yeah, but I'm never gonna
- 20:04Speaker 2: have a Fourth of July party. I would feel crazy.
- 20:06Speaker 3: I would too. Does your does your neighborhood shoot off
- 20:09Speaker 3: a lot of fireworks?
- 20:10Speaker 1: Oh?
- 20:10Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, the air is filled with smoke. LA goes
- 20:14Speaker 2: way too far with them, it does yours?
- 20:16Speaker 3: Yeah?
- 20:17Speaker 2: Oh yeah, it's so annoying.
- 20:18Speaker 3: It's annoying.
- 20:19Speaker 2: It's really it's trashy. I'll say it's classless.
- 20:22Speaker 3: Can I be honest with you? You and I where above it?
- 20:26Speaker 2: I'm Unfortunately, I'm simply above it.
- 20:28Speaker 3: I think I might be.
- 20:30Speaker 2: I'm not gutter trash.
- 20:32Speaker 3: I'm not just living in a sewer waiting for booms.
- 20:38Speaker 3: You know that's not who I am.
- 20:42Speaker 2: You'll find me reading a book or consuming a documentary.
- 20:45Speaker 3: What are you reading right now?
- 20:47Speaker 2: I actually am reading a book called I think it's
- 20:50Speaker 2: called Peep Show the It's a true crime nonfiction thing
- 20:54Speaker 2: about a serial killer in England in the fifties. It's dark, Oh,
- 20:59Speaker 2: really very interesting. What are you reading?
- 21:01Speaker 3: It's called The Winner? Okay, it's about a tennis player
- 21:06Speaker 3: in the Hampton who gets it's very talented, mister Ripley.
- 21:10Speaker 3: Oh I love.
- 21:11Speaker 2: I mean, I love the book, the talents, and yes,
- 21:14Speaker 2: I love plug Ripley on Netflix.
- 21:17Speaker 3: Ripley Netflix is by so style, so underrated. The conversation
- 21:23Speaker 3: was not happening around that show.
- 21:24Speaker 2: It got overshadowed by Baby Reindeer, which that happened at
- 21:27Speaker 2: the same time. I understand people enjoyed it, but I
- 21:30Speaker 2: think Baby Reindeer could have been any quality and everyone
- 21:32Speaker 2: would have watched it just based on the story.
- 21:34Speaker 3: Yeah, and the name Frankly, Oh yeah.
- 21:36Speaker 2: Of course, what's going on here exactly? But this isn't
- 21:38Speaker 2: like a kid show. Yeah, but Ripley is a little
- 21:42Speaker 2: bit slower. It's so beautiful, beautiful, and it was just
- 21:45Speaker 2: when I meet someone who liked Ripley, I mean, I
- 21:48Speaker 2: just feel connected to them for the rest of my life.
- 21:50Speaker 3: I don't see anyone from Ripley going to a fourth Joly.
- 21:54Speaker 2: Oh no, not one.
- 21:57Speaker 3: They don't even live their life in color.
- 21:58Speaker 2: No, you're not gonna see the fireworks that way.
- 22:03Speaker 3: No way.
- 22:06Speaker 2: Okay, I think there is something else we should talk about.
- 22:09Speaker 2: I could talk about Ripley, probably for the next hour,
- 22:11Speaker 2: but it's just blanked because I wanted to hear more
- 22:16Speaker 2: about the winter.
- 22:17Speaker 3: Actually, it's great. It's very there's like a countess the
- 22:19Speaker 3: wand character in it. It's very sort of Talton Mystery
- 22:23Speaker 3: Plea is a good example. Also, a Place in the Sun.
- 22:27Speaker 2: Oh, I'm not familiar with the Place in the Sun.
- 22:29Speaker 3: It's great. I never it's based on the book I
- 22:31Speaker 3: think American Tragedy. But the movie was with Montgomery Cliff
- 22:36Speaker 3: and Elizabeth Taylor.
- 22:37Speaker 2: Oh, yes, of course I'm familiar with this. Yes, I've
- 22:40Speaker 2: never seen it, but yeah.
- 22:41Speaker 3: Yeah, And it's essentially just an outsider coming into a
- 22:44Speaker 3: very high society environment.
- 22:46Speaker 2: I love that type of love. You read the guest
- 22:50Speaker 2: going to bring up the guests. I adore that book
- 22:51Speaker 2: is so good.
- 22:52Speaker 3: That book is be beyond brilliant.
- 22:55Speaker 2: I think the way it feels like what you feel
- 22:58Speaker 2: it happening, Yes, so fast.
- 23:00Speaker 3: So this is a little a little like The Winner.
- 23:03Speaker 2: What's who's the author? Because that title, unfortunately, is almost ungooglable.
- 23:07Speaker 3: I'm gonna say it's not Cornick McCarthy, and I'm going
- 23:13Speaker 3: to say it is. I have no idea.
- 23:17Speaker 2: Let me see, I'll try to Google it. It's a Winner.
- 23:20Speaker 3: Winner David Baldacci.
- 23:23Speaker 2: That sounds right, David Ball nineteen ninety seven, Crime.
- 23:25Speaker 3: Thriller, nineteen ninety seven.
- 23:28Speaker 2: Really you're reading a classic.
- 23:30Speaker 3: Wow, I would have thought it happened.
- 23:32Speaker 2: Or let's see. Actually there's somebody named The Winner by
- 23:36Speaker 2: Teddy Wayne.
- 23:37Speaker 3: Oh maybe that's it. What do I see the cover?
- 23:41Speaker 3: That's the one?
- 23:41Speaker 2: I okay, Teddy Wayne, you're not reading a classic.
- 23:44Speaker 3: You're reading trash nouveau garbage.
- 23:48Speaker 2: What is this a b t read?
- 23:51Speaker 3: To be honest, I love a beach read me too.
- 23:54Speaker 3: This is one?
- 23:55Speaker 2: Okay, The Winner by Teddy Wayne. And let's give credit
- 23:57Speaker 2: to David Baldacci for getting there first.
- 23:59Speaker 3: Listen. I gotta tell you, you know, I've read something recently
- 24:02Speaker 3: that blew my socks off. Stephen Spielberg speaking of Disclosure,
- 24:08Speaker 3: which I haven't seen. But I only wanted to be
- 24:09Speaker 3: her delivering the weather in that voice the entire she's
- 24:11Speaker 3: not so good and she's fabulous.
- 24:13Speaker 2: The movie whatever she's fentas, I.
- 24:15Speaker 3: Will see it and I love her. Okay. Steven Spielberg
- 24:22Speaker 3: optioned a book called Smash Okay that had nothing to do.
- 24:28Speaker 2: With the NBC classic.
- 24:30Speaker 3: Nothing He liked the name, so he optioned the title
- 24:35Speaker 3: for the name to create smash, that to whatever. I
- 24:38Speaker 3: don't know about create, but to co create whatever. Smash
- 24:41Speaker 3: the television show.
- 24:42Speaker 2: Wait, so Smash the television show is based on a book.
- 24:45Speaker 2: That is not it's based on the title of a book.
- 24:47Speaker 3: Based on the title.
- 24:48Speaker 2: It's based on a word.
- 24:50Speaker 3: Yeah, it's based it's literally based on a word.
- 24:54Speaker 2: What.
- 24:54Speaker 3: Why would you even have to option just because there's
- 24:57Speaker 3: a novel called smash?
- 24:58Speaker 2: Because I guess he's a really honest guy, you know what.
- 25:01Speaker 2: He wanted the author to be paid for thinking of
- 25:03Speaker 2: the word first.
- 25:04Speaker 3: You know what, though, he does seem honest, doesn't he. Yeah,
- 25:08Speaker 3: I'm sure.
- 25:09Speaker 2: What do we know about Steven Spield?
- 25:11Speaker 3: Nothing really? Yeah?
- 25:16Speaker 2: Well, speaking of winners and not winning, I was looking
- 25:21Speaker 2: forward to having you here today, Thank you. I was thinking,
- 25:23Speaker 2: Brian will come, he'll win, he'll leave. Well, you've lost.
- 25:27Speaker 2: The podcast is called I said, no gifts.
- 25:30Speaker 3: I know. I thought this one. Because it's small in size,
- 25:33Speaker 3: I thought it would fly under the radar.
- 25:35Speaker 2: Right, Okay, well it didn't caught you. Should we open
- 25:39Speaker 2: it here on the podcast?
- 25:40Speaker 3: We might as well. There's a gift in there. And
- 25:46Speaker 3: then I added another gift at the very second, kind
- 25:48Speaker 3: of double down. It's something I found in my bag
- 25:50Speaker 3: while I was getting this gift, but I think should
- 25:53Speaker 3: be on your radar.
- 25:56Speaker 2: Okay, let me reach in here.
- 25:57Speaker 3: Okay, let's see which one you grab first.
- 25:59Speaker 2: Okay, so grab one at a time.
- 26:01Speaker 3: If you want to. Oh, I'm glad you were glad
- 26:03Speaker 3: this one first. This surprise what.
- 26:06Speaker 2: I don't actually, Oh, it's okay, it's I have no
- 26:09Speaker 2: idea how to Yes, this is.
- 26:12Speaker 3: The and bridger. I have so many at home I'm
- 26:14Speaker 3: gonna ship to you. I'm not even kidding. Really, do
- 26:17Speaker 3: you like like a plane wipe? Oh? Of course, yes,
- 26:21Speaker 3: this is the best. It comes from Turkey. It's a
- 26:26Speaker 3: lemon lime set. Now I also have a lemon alone packaging alone.
- 26:30Speaker 3: By the way you open it, you do your business
- 26:32Speaker 3: wiping everything down. You fold it back in that pouch.
- 26:35Speaker 3: You reuse, dispose of it. You can't use no, it
- 26:38Speaker 3: does stay moist in there, okay, or you can dispose
- 26:40Speaker 3: of it very neatly when the attendant comes by. I
- 26:44Speaker 3: have to tell you this changes everything, and it's about
- 26:47Speaker 3: this big.
- 26:48Speaker 2: Should I use it now?
- 26:49Speaker 3: Use it?
- 26:49Speaker 2: Should save it for later?
- 26:50Speaker 3: No, no, no, no, no, use it now this Okay, I
- 26:53Speaker 3: wipe a surface.
- 26:54Speaker 2: We're I'm gonna I'm gonna do my hands, so then
- 26:57Speaker 2: i'll do the table.
- 26:58Speaker 3: See what you think? You might not like the set?
- 27:00Speaker 2: Oh it's lovely. Oh it's so clean. Yeah, it's so clean.
- 27:04Speaker 3: And just unfold that thing.
- 27:06Speaker 2: Oh it's enormous.
- 27:07Speaker 3: This is a blanket, enormous.
- 27:08Speaker 2: I could curl up under under this.
- 27:10Speaker 3: And I really I have so many packages of that.
- 27:12Speaker 3: I'm gonna send you one.
- 27:13Speaker 2: Oh wait, how did you get packages?
- 27:16Speaker 3: Well, my private client who lives in New York, he
- 27:20Speaker 3: is from Turkey, and he's said he will get me
- 27:23Speaker 3: these when he goes back on a visit. It's unbelievably fabulous.
- 27:26Speaker 2: Do you know how to say the name?
- 27:28Speaker 3: I don't. No, it's really it says refreshing towel.
- 27:33Speaker 2: Yeah. On the back it says refreshing and it.
- 27:35Speaker 3: Might be chessmet lemon, I think is what it says,
- 27:37Speaker 3: which I think means like lemon lime.
- 27:38Speaker 2: Well that's I just did a reel inhale and I
- 27:40Speaker 2: think I injured my.
- 27:42Speaker 3: Brain since nineteen twenty three, since nineteen twenty three, Well,
- 27:45Speaker 3: you know, so I'm watching my phone a little bit
- 27:47Speaker 3: Syrian and my Syrian family, and I believe my Turkish
- 27:51Speaker 3: friend does this too. Everyone always leaves since the beginning
- 27:57Speaker 3: of time, basically a bottle of like scented hand sanitizer
- 28:01Speaker 3: on the table, even if you've washed your hands, you
- 28:03Speaker 3: clean your hands before and after the meal.
- 28:05Speaker 2: That's a great idea.
- 28:05Speaker 3: It's a great idea. And typically, well I don't know
- 28:07Speaker 3: about typically, but in my family was like an Apricot set.
- 28:10Speaker 3: So this reminds me a lot of that.
- 28:12Speaker 2: And so but the first time you ever tried it
- 28:14Speaker 2: was on a plane.
- 28:15Speaker 3: It was on a plane.
- 28:15Speaker 2: I would go nuts.
- 28:16Speaker 3: I have to tell you, and it lasts you don't
- 28:19Speaker 3: have to do because which I do the tray obviously, right,
- 28:22Speaker 3: I do the handlebars okay, yes, right, and I do
- 28:25Speaker 3: the head rest, oh and his head one of these covers,
- 28:29Speaker 3: all of them, was.
- 28:30Speaker 2: I supposed to do my hands with it? Is it
- 28:32Speaker 2: okay that I did my hands? Oh?
- 28:34Speaker 3: Yeah? And I do my hands with oh? Sorry?
- 28:35Speaker 2: And I was like, wait, have I just used like
- 28:37Speaker 2: no industrial cleaner?
- 28:39Speaker 3: No, but that was the surprise gift, yeah for me.
- 28:42Speaker 3: Even so this was on Turkish airlines. No, this was
- 28:46Speaker 3: on so this is at the Istumbul Airport. They saw these.
- 28:49Speaker 2: Oh yeah, when were you instanable?
- 28:51Speaker 3: Never?
- 28:52Speaker 2: Oh, just the client has just provided just the client.
- 28:55Speaker 3: The client, by the way, is what I call my partner.
- 28:57Speaker 3: But he works in the public sector. It doesn't really
- 28:59Speaker 3: want to be privat No, I call it my private client.
- 29:06Speaker 2: Control his finances. You teach him to sing. These are
- 29:09Speaker 2: all kinds of things that this.
- 29:11Speaker 3: Yes, we met it Chase private. Well, honey, of course
- 29:14Speaker 3: we did separate entrance next to the bank, but not
- 29:19Speaker 3: in the bank. So uh yeah, so he brings the
- 29:22Speaker 3: back for.
- 29:23Speaker 2: Me because okay, and so you've never been never.
- 29:27Speaker 3: We were supposed to go actually this month, but it
- 29:31Speaker 3: just I got too busy and it just didn't work out. Well.
- 29:35Speaker 2: Speaking of going places, you were just in Mexico City
- 29:37Speaker 2: with our friends, with our dear friend Michelle Collins.
- 29:40Speaker 3: Who, by the way, I listened to you on her show.
- 29:44Speaker 2: Yes, it was just on it.
- 29:45Speaker 3: I am probably after this well, I don't know all
- 29:50Speaker 3: the time, but maybe tomorrow morning. Can you have a
- 29:52Speaker 3: dirty soda in the morning?
- 29:54Speaker 2: Sure, I mean a lot of people in Utah do it.
- 29:56Speaker 3: How do you order it at Taco Bell? You just go?
- 29:58Speaker 3: Can I have a dirty soda.
- 29:58Speaker 2: You say, yes, can I have a dirty Mountain dew?
- 30:01Speaker 3: Dirty is called. So I'm going to get one because
- 30:03Speaker 3: I have to be honest. You know that thing when
- 30:05Speaker 3: people are experiencing a food or a drink and they're
- 30:07Speaker 3: saying they don't like it, and it's all you can
- 30:09Speaker 3: do not to try it.
- 30:10Speaker 2: Yeah, of course, because how am I supposed to know exactly?
- 30:15Speaker 3: And it was just a color and a flavor that
- 30:17Speaker 3: I couldn't get my hand. I couldn't get a handle
- 30:18Speaker 3: on it.
- 30:19Speaker 2: When gorgeous drink.
- 30:20Speaker 3: It did look very pretty, seafolm is how you described it.
- 30:22Speaker 2: Yes, it's really beautiful.
- 30:24Speaker 3: It sounded beautiful. So I want to try one.
- 30:26Speaker 2: Yeah, I would say, get it through the drive through. Yeah,
- 30:29Speaker 2: because what happened with me is I went in store
- 30:31Speaker 2: this is a weird talk about with no drive through
- 30:34Speaker 2: and listener, I took this drink to Michelle Collins showed
- 30:36Speaker 2: to force her to drink this horrible dirty Mountain dew.
- 30:39Speaker 2: But the I ordered the two dirty Mountain dews, and
- 30:42Speaker 2: the essentially what happened is the employee dumped some white
- 30:45Speaker 2: sauce at the bottom of it. That handed me the
- 30:47Speaker 2: cups and then I was in charge of filling the drink,
- 30:50Speaker 2: and I think what's supposed to happen is there's probably
- 30:52Speaker 2: supposed to put the soda first then because it's essentially creamer.
- 30:56Speaker 2: So it was just like kind of swishing around at
- 30:58Speaker 2: the bottom like somebody had essentially thrown up in the
- 31:02Speaker 2: in the thing. So it wasn't quite what you would
- 31:04Speaker 2: want flavor wise. You can maybe drink three an ounce
- 31:09Speaker 2: of this before you're done.
- 31:10Speaker 3: I was gonna say, did you bust through a wall
- 31:12Speaker 3: after drinking? I mean, mountain dew is pretty caffeinated.
- 31:14Speaker 2: It's extremely caffeinated. And the whatever the white sauce was
- 31:19Speaker 2: was essentially suntan lotion or something it was. I wasn't
- 31:23Speaker 2: able to consume very much of us. Yeah, but I
- 31:25Speaker 2: love that Baja blast flavor.
- 31:27Speaker 3: Is that. Don't get me wrong, Mountain do Baja blast.
- 31:30Speaker 2: Well, you can get any mountain dew, any dirty mountain
- 31:32Speaker 2: dew blast. I got the and the Baja blast is
- 31:35Speaker 2: the most beautiful color probably that exists in nature.
- 31:39Speaker 3: Is that what the seafoam green is?
- 31:40Speaker 2: Yeah, it's gorgeous.
- 31:42Speaker 3: Can you pull it up?
- 31:43Speaker 2: Yeah, let's see if I'm sure it won't do it
- 31:46Speaker 2: justice to be honest, you've got to get your eyes
- 31:48Speaker 2: on this in person. I'm not looking at Baja Fresh,
- 31:52Speaker 2: no Baja Blast.
- 31:54Speaker 3: Baja Fresh can go scratch. I hate to say it.
- 31:56Speaker 2: ALRP.
- 31:57Speaker 3: Are they over?
- 31:58Speaker 2: I think at least in La. I haven't seen one
- 32:00Speaker 2: in a long time.
- 32:01Speaker 3: Honestly, it was time.
- 32:02Speaker 2: Okay, So this is not gonna this again. This is
- 32:05Speaker 2: just I mean, it's not even fair to the product that's.
- 32:08Speaker 3: You don't think this is going to do. I think
- 32:10Speaker 3: it's really pretty.
- 32:10Speaker 2: It's pretty there. Once you're once you're holding a glass
- 32:13Speaker 2: of that, you're gonna go out of your mind.
- 32:15Speaker 3: Yep.
- 32:16Speaker 2: The fact that they know other soda brand has gotten
- 32:18Speaker 2: on this color.
- 32:19Speaker 3: It's wild, insane.
- 32:21Speaker 2: What a waste of our lives we've gone. I think
- 32:23Speaker 2: bajap Blast is only within the last fifteen years.
- 32:26Speaker 3: This is like a drink you share with like the
- 32:29Speaker 3: fish guy from Shape of Water. Veryugh yeah, so beautiful.
- 32:34Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe through like a silly straw, same color.
- 32:38Speaker 3: He was very sort of childlike.
- 32:39Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what happened to him, you.
- 32:42Speaker 3: Know, I don't know. He was such a heart throb
- 32:43Speaker 3: for a minute. It's like that convict that then married
- 32:46Speaker 3: the top man heirs.
- 32:48Speaker 2: Who's this?
- 32:49Speaker 3: You know that hot con I think they called him. No,
- 32:52Speaker 3: he was like hot con. Yeah, and then he became
- 32:55Speaker 3: a model.
- 32:55Speaker 2: Topman heiress, yes, the top Shop heiress, a top Shop Yeah,
- 33:00Speaker 2: I can't hot fellon jare.
- 33:02Speaker 3: I mean, meet that's him.
- 33:04Speaker 2: Let's see, let's get my eyes on him.
- 33:06Speaker 3: He was stunning. I mean it probably still is. Yeah.
- 33:09Speaker 2: Now I'm gonna say he looks he looks like he's
- 33:13Speaker 2: got a teardrop tattoo. He does so immediately I'm backing away.
- 33:18Speaker 3: I'm thinking not the top Shop Harris.
- 33:20Speaker 2: No, she went for she did? And did they? Are
- 33:23Speaker 2: they still together?
- 33:24Speaker 3: I think they might be.
- 33:25Speaker 2: Yeah, true love found a way. Yeah, good for them.
- 33:28Speaker 2: I know where did they meet outside jail?
- 33:31Speaker 3: Either there or I think he was maybe modeling for
- 33:34Speaker 3: like Louis vu Tan. Maybe he was modeling for top Shop.
- 33:37Speaker 3: I don't know.
- 33:38Speaker 2: Wow, good for him.
- 33:38Speaker 3: Yeah. No, he came out and he like busted out.
- 33:41Speaker 2: I'm proud of this guy, me too. I thought it
- 33:43Speaker 2: was gonna be one of those situations. I remember a
- 33:45Speaker 2: few years ago there was like this like twenty year
- 33:48Speaker 2: old twink who married like this ninety five year old
- 33:51Speaker 2: British man.
- 33:52Speaker 3: Who beautiful could barely move. Yeah, you know what, I
- 33:56Speaker 3: have a very smart friend who told me, the first
- 33:59Speaker 3: time you marry for money and the second time you
- 34:02Speaker 3: married for love. I have not fought followed that, but
- 34:08Speaker 3: she my jaw dropped to the floor and she goes
- 34:12Speaker 3: if the more you think about it, the more it
- 34:13Speaker 3: makes sense.
- 34:13Speaker 2: It's a good strategy. But they need to teach out
- 34:16Speaker 2: in high school. People should know leaving high school about that.
- 34:20Speaker 3: That's right.
- 34:21Speaker 2: You learn that in adulthood. It's like, well, sorry, I
- 34:23Speaker 2: found my person and they're not a billionaire exactly. Now
- 34:26Speaker 2: what am I supposed to do?
- 34:28Speaker 3: Correct?
- 34:28Speaker 2: Cheat with a rich person?
- 34:30Speaker 3: Yeah, it doesn't work anywhere. It's not on paper.
- 34:32Speaker 2: No, unless it becomes kind of an extortion situation.
- 34:37Speaker 3: That's sexy.
- 34:38Speaker 2: That's extremely sexy.
- 34:40Speaker 3: Very much is that's very like tiny pistol of thigh high.
- 34:48Speaker 2: Okay, let's say there's another gift in here. Let me
- 34:50Speaker 2: reach in.
- 34:52Speaker 3: This is the main one, Okay.
- 34:53Speaker 2: Pulling it out? Thank you? That's oh oh, I like
- 34:57Speaker 2: what I'm saying. It's a pocket psychic three card mystery
- 35:01Speaker 2: tarot reading a glimpse of the past, present and future
- 35:04Speaker 2: from of course Housewitch a DJ Housewitch.
- 35:09Speaker 3: GJ. Housewitch puts these together. I think they're great gifts.
- 35:13Speaker 3: In fact, I was gifted one of these. Okay, that
- 35:16Speaker 3: what made right? And the reason is because do you
- 35:20Speaker 3: know Caitlin Riley? Oh yeah, of course, so funny. So
- 35:23Speaker 3: she came on at the Asgrana podcast You've been a
- 35:26Speaker 3: guest on, and she did a three card terror reading
- 35:29Speaker 3: for me on that show. It went from bad to
- 35:33Speaker 3: worse to worst on everything in my past that was
- 35:40Speaker 3: indicating what happened in my present or future was I
- 35:44Speaker 3: mean I should have immediately crawled into a bomb shelter
- 35:46Speaker 3: and just stayed there for a good five years. So
- 35:50Speaker 3: then she redid it.
- 35:51Speaker 2: Oh, she redid it, and that feels like it's playing
- 35:53Speaker 2: with fire.
- 35:54Speaker 3: And it was. It was, I mean, hell struck twice
- 36:00Speaker 3: because it went from bad to worse to worse to
- 36:02Speaker 3: worst to us. So a friend of mine, my friend
- 36:05Speaker 3: of Lev, said to me, I'm giving you She gave
- 36:09Speaker 3: me this essentially, it gave me a gift of this
- 36:11Speaker 3: type of gift and said you deserve a due over,
- 36:14Speaker 3: and I go. But there was a due over and
- 36:16Speaker 3: it was awful. Boy, But I liked my doover in
- 36:19Speaker 3: this situation. Now. I don't know what's in these I
- 36:22Speaker 3: don't know what these say. I don't know what they're doing.
- 36:24Speaker 2: But well, before we do this, what did any of
- 36:27Speaker 2: the three readings come to pass?
- 36:30Speaker 3: I never, you know, I read something once and then
- 36:32Speaker 3: I'll shut up.
- 36:33Speaker 2: Please, I'd like you to be quiet the rest of
- 36:35Speaker 2: the episode.
- 36:36Speaker 3: So I read a book about Princess Margaret once okay,
- 36:39Speaker 3: and the birth of newspaper psychics. In other words, reading
- 36:46Speaker 3: you off your sign started with her birth. WHOA, that's
- 36:50Speaker 3: when it all started. Why, I don't know. They predict
- 36:53Speaker 3: They were trying to predict when she was born. They
- 36:55Speaker 3: were predicting what her life would be. Oh, essentially, and
- 36:58Speaker 3: people were fascinated by it, sold a billion issues. And
- 37:02Speaker 3: then what they quickly realized was if we do this
- 37:06Speaker 3: every day, no one's going to remember what we said
- 37:09Speaker 3: the week before, the week before that, the week rise,
- 37:11Speaker 3: as long as we keep doing it. And I guess
- 37:13Speaker 3: that's what's happened to me, because I don't It's only
- 37:16Speaker 3: happened three times to me. But I don't remember any
- 37:18Speaker 3: of these readings. I just said the first two were
- 37:21Speaker 3: bad and the third one was good.
- 37:24Speaker 2: I think that that's I think it just kind of
- 37:26Speaker 2: soaks into you. Yeah, and then you do your things.
- 37:29Speaker 3: You're very generous.
- 37:31Speaker 2: I should start doing horoscopes on this. People hooked on
- 37:34Speaker 2: my horoscopes.
- 37:35Speaker 3: What people realize You could say whatever you want and
- 37:37Speaker 3: then no one's going to remember.
- 37:38Speaker 2: Yeah, let me see here. Yeah, listener, in the next week,
- 37:42Speaker 2: avoid dogs.
- 37:45Speaker 3: Okay, Yeah, that's a good one. Okay, sorry, expands all
- 37:50Speaker 3: the astrological signs of the listeners.
- 37:52Speaker 2: Yes, yes, for everybody. It's kind of a uh I
- 37:56Speaker 2: don't have time for all twelve you kidding me? No,
- 38:00Speaker 2: these are very universal.
- 38:02Speaker 3: Avoid dogs.
- 38:03Speaker 2: Avoid dogs.
- 38:03Speaker 3: What if someone owns a dog, be.
- 38:07Speaker 2: Very careful, careful this next week, avoid dogs. So okay,
- 38:12Speaker 2: that's an interesting Now I feel like I've put something
- 38:15Speaker 2: very dangerous out there. Listener. We're backing it up or reversing.
- 38:21Speaker 2: Embrace dogs exactly. Now we're in some tough that is
- 38:29Speaker 2: quite okay, We're going a third time. Brian gets three.
- 38:32Speaker 2: You get three. Strike a healthy balance with dogs.
- 38:37Speaker 3: That is a great piece of advice.
- 38:40Speaker 2: There we go. It takes a little practice. Takes a
- 38:43Speaker 2: little practice. Okay, So I'm going to open this. I
- 38:45Speaker 2: think you should Okay, is there any advice. Okay, so
- 38:48Speaker 2: just pull out the first card. This is the energy
- 38:49Speaker 2: being released from the past. Pull out the second card.
- 38:52Speaker 2: This is the energy surrounding the present. Pull out the
- 38:55Speaker 2: final card. This is the energy in store for the future.
- 38:59Speaker 2: So do you want do you want to do it
- 39:00Speaker 2: for you or do you want to do it for me?
- 39:01Speaker 3: I want to do for you. Okay, yeah, okay, here
- 39:04Speaker 3: we go. Do you but you pull the card? Mate?
- 39:07Speaker 3: Your energy should be honest? Okay, for whatever that means.
- 39:10Speaker 3: Have you done this before? But have you ever had
- 39:11Speaker 3: a reading?
- 39:11Speaker 2: I've had to read, like a full reading. Do you
- 39:13Speaker 2: know Lizzie Cooperman degreating Lizzy Cooper.
- 39:15Speaker 3: She's so funny.
- 39:16Speaker 2: People should go. She does tarot. I think I think
- 39:20Speaker 2: you can, like, oh real, get private readings from this
- 39:22Speaker 2: and they're so good.
- 39:23Speaker 3: She's hilarious.
- 39:24Speaker 2: Okay, you're pulling this out.
- 39:25Speaker 3: Okay, Okay. This card you pulled is called the Sun.
- 39:30Speaker 3: And you see a big sun, neutral face and a
- 39:34Speaker 3: baby thundercat riding on a horse.
- 39:39Speaker 2: That's me.
- 39:40Speaker 3: Okay, this sun, you're walking on sunshine. Okay, let yourself
- 39:46Speaker 3: bask in the good times. Your creativity is on fire now.
- 39:51Speaker 2: This all happened in the past.
- 39:53Speaker 3: I guess. So I don't understand the wording of this,
- 39:55Speaker 3: to be honest, because it's this pull up the first card.
- 39:57Speaker 3: This is the energy being released from the past. What
- 39:59Speaker 3: does that mean?
- 40:00Speaker 2: Oh? Interesting? So something in the past has held that up.
- 40:04Speaker 2: I'm doing. I'm working for myself here. Okay, I've barely
- 40:06Speaker 2: got to work from I'll take it. I can't retire unleast.
- 40:10Speaker 3: Your inner artist. Okay, finally some clarity. Oh thank god,
- 40:15Speaker 3: the weight of some unknown is lifted. Lead with optimism,
- 40:20Speaker 3: joy and confidence. Your energy can warm up any room
- 40:24Speaker 3: right now. I'm feeling it. By the way, sometimes life
- 40:26Speaker 3: just feels really, really simple and beautiful. This is one
- 40:29Speaker 3: of those times.
- 40:30Speaker 2: Lucky you, I'm gonna be in tears by the end
- 40:32Speaker 2: of it.
- 40:33Speaker 3: This is really nice. This is already so much better.
- 40:37Speaker 2: But now we've got to left, We've got this is
- 40:39Speaker 2: going to be devastating. Okay. This is present present.
- 40:42Speaker 3: Okay, Okay. So the card you pulled is the world,
- 40:46Speaker 3: and it's a beautiful woman with a sash's gorgeous gorge.
- 40:50Speaker 3: She's being protected by an eagle that that person, a
- 40:55Speaker 3: goat and a lion. Okay, so this is yes, this
- 40:59Speaker 3: is the energy surrounding the present. Congratulations. Oh, you've reached
- 41:05Speaker 3: the completion of a major project milestoners cycle. Oh interesting,
- 41:10Speaker 3: you've worked so hard. Now you get to watch all
- 41:12Speaker 3: the pieces fall right into place. Oh, you've reached a
- 41:15Speaker 3: new level of mastery. Now it's time to begin the
- 41:17Speaker 3: entire process again. You've got this. Make your next move
- 41:22Speaker 3: from a place of empowerment. You've built strong supportive foundations
- 41:25Speaker 3: for yourself. Hindsight is twenty twenty. Now that you've reached
- 41:28Speaker 3: your destination, take some time to reflect on the road
- 41:31Speaker 3: that took you here with more clarity than you had
- 41:33Speaker 3: in the moment. What do you think?
- 41:34Speaker 2: I love that? And I'll say this actually lines up. Really,
- 41:37Speaker 2: I just I just organized my pants in my closet
- 41:41Speaker 2: and put them in separate piles. Pants, pants shorts.
- 41:45Speaker 3: Are the pants in the separate piles and separate piles
- 41:47Speaker 3: for a reason beyond you.
- 41:48Speaker 2: Yes, you know you've got more casual genes focus Okay, ah,
- 41:53Speaker 2: slightly more dressy, got it? And then my pile of
- 41:56Speaker 2: shorts that I'm not satisfied with any of them.
- 41:58Speaker 3: I feel that way about my pants. I am much
- 42:01Speaker 3: more of a shorts, but I don't know shorts that much.
- 42:03Speaker 3: But I feel like I think I have a long
- 42:06Speaker 3: torso maybe I don't know. I feel like in pants,
- 42:08Speaker 3: my legs are kind of squats. Oh interesting, even though
- 42:11Speaker 3: I mostly wear pants. Where are you getting shorts? But
- 42:15Speaker 3: all kinds of places. Through my AMEX card, I have
- 42:19Speaker 3: a deal quarterly from from lu Lemon. Oh interesting, So
- 42:26Speaker 3: I buy my shorts there one pair of shorts every quarter,
- 42:29Speaker 3: so four year.
- 42:30Speaker 2: And this is like a like a casual wear out short,
- 42:32Speaker 2: not like ath leisure.
- 42:34Speaker 3: Not necessarily like an athletic short.
- 42:35Speaker 2: Now, yeah, I just never know what shorts should look like.
- 42:39Speaker 3: I think I think we're in an era of I'm
- 42:42Speaker 3: not even kidding max five inches.
- 42:45Speaker 2: Right, I agree with this, Yes, Weirdly, because I'm essentially
- 42:49Speaker 2: the size of a child, it's hard to get a
- 42:51Speaker 2: short that feels They always still feel a little too long, really,
- 42:56Speaker 2: and then they start to feel like mom on vacation shorts.
- 42:58Speaker 3: Yeah, there is a fine line. But see, I feel
- 43:00Speaker 3: that way about pants. I feel like the pants I
- 43:02Speaker 3: buy are too long, and even when I get them hemmed.
- 43:05Speaker 3: Maybe it's just that the person I'm going to isn't
- 43:07Speaker 3: that great, but they feel like they whenever I get them, hem,
- 43:09Speaker 3: they feel like they start to like bell bottom.
- 43:11Speaker 2: Oh. I hate that, unless they don't already have a
- 43:15Speaker 2: pan made.
- 43:16Speaker 3: And it's not how the pant was made. Like I'll
- 43:17Speaker 3: get a stunning pair of jeans and then they become
- 43:20Speaker 3: bell bottoms.
- 43:21Speaker 2: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear.
- 43:22Speaker 3: Do you have to heal your stuff?
- 43:23Speaker 2: No? I but I'm very particular about my jeans, especially.
- 43:27Speaker 2: I've started going to this weird almost like work clothing
- 43:32Speaker 2: store that has a bunch of vintage jeans in East
- 43:35Speaker 2: LA that I adore. And it's just kind of this
- 43:38Speaker 2: older lady who you know, sells like work pants and stuff.
- 43:42Speaker 2: I love her, and she keeps the door locked, so
- 43:44Speaker 2: you have to go knock on the door. She lets
- 43:46Speaker 2: you in, and then she's very good about telling you
- 43:48Speaker 2: if your pants look good or not. I adore, but
- 43:50Speaker 2: it's very hard when you're buying vintage jeans, especially it's
- 43:52Speaker 2: like they have one in my size and I have
- 43:55Speaker 2: short legs and most men are huge, right, so I'm
- 44:00Speaker 2: like looking at the pants and they're all like a
- 44:01Speaker 2: thirty six length? What am I doing?
- 44:04Speaker 3: You know, Michelle Collins would tell you would do great
- 44:06Speaker 3: at like a sample sale or something.
- 44:07Speaker 2: Oh, she's kept us from.
- 44:09Speaker 3: Me, really, because the sizes that are usually there or
- 44:13Speaker 3: left over are the very small ones in the very
- 44:17Speaker 3: big one. Oh, those are the ones that you can
- 44:19Speaker 3: find the best deals.
- 44:20Speaker 2: Oh this is good to know. Yeah, okay, it was
- 44:22Speaker 2: a little let's find one. Yes, let's see the future.
- 44:26Speaker 2: This is where we're headed, folks.
- 44:28Speaker 3: Oh, yes, okay, so oh this card has a little
- 44:32Speaker 3: bit of a like a green tinted Yeah. This is
- 44:35Speaker 3: a very sort of like Augustus Sea Caesar Augustus with uh,
- 44:41Speaker 3: what do you call her? The sphinx?
- 44:42Speaker 2: Sort of the sphinx?
- 44:43Speaker 3: Yes, and then well two one is winking, the winking sphinx.
- 44:47Speaker 3: This is called the chariot. Okay, this is the energy
- 44:50Speaker 3: in store for the future. It's time to get crystal
- 44:53Speaker 3: clear on your direction. Okay, a little planning goes a
- 44:56Speaker 3: long way. Set yourself up for success by putting structures
- 44:59Speaker 3: in habit. It's in place now that will bring more
- 45:02Speaker 3: ease and support on the road to your goal later
- 45:04Speaker 3: you're on the paths of success, Stay focused, determined, and steady.
- 45:08Speaker 3: Are you currently moving toward things that fill you with passion?
- 45:12Speaker 3: If not, it's time to plot a new course, now
- 45:15Speaker 3: is not the time to follow forward your own path.
- 45:19Speaker 3: You get to decide where you want to go and
- 45:21Speaker 3: how you want to get there.
- 45:22Speaker 2: Wow, this has been really beautiful. Yeah, I think this
- 45:25Speaker 2: has been an absolutely lovely reader.
- 45:27Speaker 3: You got three really good cars.
- 45:29Speaker 2: He's going to turn me into a monster, I think.
- 45:30Speaker 2: So it's amspolutely impossible to deal with.
- 45:32Speaker 3: I'm on my own hat. Move.
- 45:35Speaker 2: I'm an individual.
- 45:36Speaker 3: That's right, get out of here. It's like that, did
- 45:39Speaker 3: you ever go through this when you came out that
- 45:42Speaker 3: you you know, you had like a laden adolescence in
- 45:45Speaker 3: other words.
- 45:45Speaker 2: Right, totally did you have that? Yeah? Of course.
- 45:47Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 45:47Speaker 2: I feel like I'm still going through I feel like
- 45:49Speaker 2: gay men are just like unless you were born after
- 45:52Speaker 2: twenty ten. Yeah, it's just like, well now I'm just
- 45:54Speaker 2: essentially eighteen for the rest of my life.
- 45:57Speaker 3: Ye, because you're like I was robbed. I was absolutely
- 46:00Speaker 3: brow same. Yeah.
- 46:01Speaker 2: Let me play a video game, let me screw around
- 46:04Speaker 2: non stop.
- 46:04Speaker 3: I have a fun crush. Yeah. Let me be just
- 46:08Speaker 3: mean as shit to you.
- 46:11Speaker 2: That's the one thing I well, I guess I do
- 46:14Speaker 2: gossip a lot, me too, But I'm not mean. I'm
- 46:16Speaker 2: not a mean I know a lot of mean ones met.
- 46:19Speaker 3: Honestly, it goes back to the Fourth of July parties.
- 46:21Speaker 2: Oh my god, I think the start.
- 46:24Speaker 3: Yeah mean gay boy do they flock to those? Yeah?
- 46:27Speaker 2: Yeah, Wow, now you've really unlocked something new.
- 46:30Speaker 3: That is because to get that body Instagram photos.
- 46:35Speaker 2: I'm seeing the photos and I'm thinking I wish I
- 46:38Speaker 2: was there, but I also don't want to be there.
- 46:41Speaker 3: I would never do that. I can't imagine to be honest.
- 46:45Speaker 2: And getting your photo taken at the same.
- 46:47Speaker 3: Time, would never do. I would never put my arm
- 46:51Speaker 3: around a friend or acquaintance who did never shirt on ever,
- 47:00Speaker 3: for sure do you?
- 47:02Speaker 2: Oh yeah, absolutely yeah in a speedo nonetheless in front
- 47:06Speaker 2: of a camera.
- 47:07Speaker 3: No way in hell would that happen.
- 47:10Speaker 2: I just couldn't do it. Ever, No, I was like,
- 47:12Speaker 2: who is that breacher?
- 47:15Speaker 3: I would honestly think someone is fully, someone is not
- 47:19Speaker 3: on their own path right now, someone is a follower
- 47:21Speaker 3: and has lost the plot. Yeah, because the same with me.
- 47:24Speaker 3: I couldn't imagine it.
- 47:25Speaker 2: Wow, yeah, yeah, that would be That would be a
- 47:27Speaker 2: whole new me.
- 47:28Speaker 3: Yeah, and even the people I like I sometimes have.
- 47:31Speaker 3: It's been a while, but I used to go on
- 47:33Speaker 3: New Year's with like five gay friends to palm springsers things.
- 47:35Speaker 3: I mean, we are never knew ites on age, Like
- 47:37Speaker 3: that's how we're doing.
- 47:39Speaker 2: I don't know how you get into it. Yeah, yeah,
- 47:41Speaker 2: and God blessed everybody. Do your own thing of do
- 47:44Speaker 2: your own things. Just don't invite me to your parties.
- 47:47Speaker 2: Don't leave me home to.
- 47:48Speaker 3: Cry, that's right.
- 47:49Speaker 2: Yeah, and judge you always do your own thing so
- 47:54Speaker 2: I can judge.
- 47:54Speaker 3: You, yes, exactly, because without you doing, without your freedom,
- 47:58Speaker 3: I have no perspect.
- 48:02Speaker 2: Exactly.
- 48:03Speaker 3: So this is a real it's the you know what
- 48:05Speaker 3: I mean, it's the it's the cycle of life. It's
- 48:07Speaker 3: it's the packing.
- 48:09Speaker 2: Order, absolutely, the chain. Well, this is such a beautiful gift.
- 48:12Speaker 2: I'm so thrilled about this. Now, what has to happen
- 48:14Speaker 2: to this particular deck going to be reused? Does that
- 48:17Speaker 2: have to be burned?
- 48:18Speaker 3: Oh god, that's a good question.
- 48:19Speaker 2: I guess it'll just be you. We'll set it up here. Yeah,
- 48:21Speaker 2: that's fine, and then if there's a guest that feels
- 48:23Speaker 2: like really boring, we'll pull them out.
- 48:27Speaker 3: That's a great idea.
- 48:28Speaker 2: Or let's caveat, or a lost loser shouldn't be here.
- 48:35Speaker 3: That's true. Anyone who's really down in the dumps. Yeah,
- 48:39Speaker 3: we we give you give.
- 48:40Speaker 2: A reading listener the next episode. I read the guests Tarot.
- 48:44Speaker 2: You know they're a complete loser period.
- 48:48Speaker 3: Absolutely, they're the mom in little House on the print.
- 48:52Speaker 3: That's what they're bringing to the table.
- 48:58Speaker 2: Before we get into all of my exciting game and novelties,
- 49:01Speaker 2: I want you to promote something.
- 49:02Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm making my off Broadway debut.
- 49:05Speaker 2: It's just unbelievable.
- 49:07Speaker 3: No other way to say it. There simply isn't another way.
- 49:10Speaker 2: There's kind of not another option.
- 49:11Speaker 3: I get to speak French in that sentence. I get
- 49:13Speaker 3: to do all kinds of things. It's called are you
- 49:18Speaker 3: mad at Me? Okay? It's seventy minutes, which we love, the.
- 49:21Speaker 2: Perfect time I would leave after seventy seventy one. I'm
- 49:24Speaker 2: leaving the.
- 49:25Speaker 3: Theater seventy minutes at seven pm?
- 49:27Speaker 2: Is there anything This is my dream show?
- 49:29Speaker 3: Is there anything better?
- 49:29Speaker 2: I get to eat dinner at five, yeah, I get
- 49:31Speaker 2: to be home by nine.
- 49:32Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 49:33Speaker 3: I mean, it's everything you want. And it's essentially a
- 49:37Speaker 3: panic attack on stage for seventy minutes. It's very musical,
- 49:41Speaker 3: it's very interactive. I tell people it's like sleep no more,
- 49:44Speaker 3: but for people pleasers.
- 49:45Speaker 2: Oh this sounds great.
- 49:46Speaker 3: It's just great. And I'm doing it in Soho at
- 49:49Speaker 3: the Hero Arts Center. From it's only thirty shows from
- 49:51Speaker 3: July tenth to August fifteenth.
- 49:53Speaker 2: Thirty shows. That's a lot.
- 49:54Speaker 3: It's a lot. But I did Edinburgh last year, so
- 49:57Speaker 3: I got a taste of it.
- 49:58Speaker 2: Which how many did you do that?
- 50:00Speaker 3: Something like that? Like twenty six? Yeah, this is so excited,
- 50:03Speaker 3: very excited.
- 50:04Speaker 2: Oh my god, I wish it was.
- 50:05Speaker 3: In New York too. Can I send you an invite
- 50:08Speaker 3: for opening night anyway, even though you're.
- 50:09Speaker 2: Not going to be there, just so I feel inclined.
- 50:11Speaker 3: Yeah, exclude yeah, exactly, and.
- 50:13Speaker 2: Then I'm going to accept and become a problem. Yeah,
- 50:15Speaker 2: I'm gonna show it has a problem.
- 50:17Speaker 3: You're only ever this solution. You're gonna are you mad
- 50:19Speaker 3: at me? Showed our comfort tickets? But Bridgard, Yeah, to me,
- 50:23Speaker 3: you are the You're you're a Broadway start.
- 50:26Speaker 2: To me, I'm a Broadway listener. You have to go
- 50:29Speaker 2: to the show in my stead. I'm not in New
- 50:32Speaker 2: York right now, so go see it. Oh I'm so
- 50:33Speaker 2: excited for it.
- 50:34Speaker 3: Thank you. Yeah, I'm excited too.
- 50:36Speaker 2: All right, let's play some games.
- 50:37Speaker 3: I'm with it.
- 50:38Speaker 2: I mentioned before we started recording, we might play two
- 50:41Speaker 2: games or to a game. In a new segment, we'll see.
- 50:43Speaker 2: These are new things that Ellis and I were kind
- 50:45Speaker 2: of experimenting with on the Patreon episode we did. This
- 50:49Speaker 2: first one is called invite list. I'm going to start
- 50:53Speaker 2: naming celebrities. You're planning a party. Yeah, you get to
- 50:57Speaker 2: invite ten people to a party, so you have to
- 50:59Speaker 2: say invited or not invited, and once you get to ten,
- 51:02Speaker 2: that's the party.
- 51:03Speaker 3: Got it? Okay, that's fine, Okay.
- 51:06Speaker 2: Okay, and Elis, you'll be keeping track. Okay, Great Lord
- 51:11Speaker 2: not invited, Liz Cheney not invited, Rowan Atkinson you invited,
- 51:17Speaker 2: Frank Ocean invited, Eddie Redmain not invited, Alec Baldwin not invited,
- 51:23Speaker 2: Arianna Grande not invited, Michael Phelps uh not invited, to
- 51:29Speaker 2: me more invited, bon Jovi invited, Tim Cook.
- 51:34Speaker 3: Not invited, George W.
- 51:35Speaker 2: Bush not invited, Hayley Bieber not invited, Jenny McCarthy not invited,
- 51:41Speaker 2: Keiki Palmer invited, Zendaya invited, Jennifer Lopez not invited, Jennifer
- 51:49Speaker 2: Garner not invited, Jennifer Hudson invited, Jennifer Andiston invited, LaToya
- 51:56Speaker 2: Jackson invited, wax A Hatchie not invited, The Weekend not invited,
- 52:02Speaker 2: Florence Pugh not invited, Simone Biles invited. All right, that's
- 52:09Speaker 2: you were laser accurate on it.
- 52:11Speaker 1: I am.
- 52:11Speaker 4: I don't even I didn't even have time to write
- 52:13Speaker 4: the first two down, Like I was like, okay, I'm
- 52:16Speaker 4: gonna I'm gonna say each number, and I'm also going
- 52:19Speaker 4: to write things down, and clearly I.
- 52:21Speaker 2: Failed at my mission.
- 52:22Speaker 4: So I only have Dememe mour On.
- 52:24Speaker 2: We got Rowan Atkinson.
- 52:26Speaker 3: Yeah, that's right, was it?
- 52:27Speaker 2: Frank Ocean? Yes, that happened, Thank you?
- 52:30Speaker 3: Wow?
- 52:31Speaker 2: What a party? Can we hear this list? Read back?
- 52:32Speaker 3: It was great?
- 52:33Speaker 4: Absolutely, So we have Ron Atkinson, Frank Ocean, Demi moour Bon, Jovi,
- 52:38Speaker 4: Keiki Palmer, Zendia, Jennifer Hudson, Jennifer Aniston, LaToya Jackson, and
- 52:43Speaker 4: Simone Biles.
- 52:44Speaker 2: What a group.
- 52:45Speaker 3: I love that. I gotta say that is a fun group.
- 52:48Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a fourth of July to remember.
- 52:50Speaker 3: I feel like no one at this party, no one
- 52:53Speaker 3: at any party has to do any work. If Keky
- 52:55Speaker 3: Palmer's there.
- 52:55Speaker 2: Oh no, you know what I mean, Oh, she's I
- 52:57Speaker 2: mean I think that she has a generous spirit, so funny.
- 53:00Speaker 3: She's hilarious, she's an anecdote for everything. She should sit
- 53:04Speaker 3: right in the middle. To be honest, absolutely, she would
- 53:05Speaker 3: facilitate it. I would have to do practically. I would
- 53:09Speaker 3: have no stress knowing that she's at that part.
- 53:11Speaker 2: I almost feel guilty asking her to come because she's
- 53:13Speaker 2: going to work for her Yeah. Yeah, but she loves it, obviously,
- 53:16Speaker 2: I think she does. That's so it's her fault.
- 53:17Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 53:18Speaker 2: Well that was excellently played, just beautifully played. All right.
- 53:21Speaker 2: Now this new one is a segment called It's only Polite. Now,
- 53:26Speaker 2: this is what you're going to do. You're going to
- 53:28Speaker 2: tell me like a new manner or something polite people
- 53:31Speaker 2: should be doing. I'll give you an example. This is
- 53:35Speaker 2: when I think that we need to I noticed this yesterday.
- 53:38Speaker 2: I think it's only polite that when you're at a
- 53:41Speaker 2: red light and the person in front of you does
- 53:43Speaker 2: not move forward at the green light, not one honk,
- 53:48Speaker 2: it should be two honks. One honk is angry.
- 53:51Speaker 3: I'm with you.
- 53:52Speaker 2: I think if you do two honks, it's a nudge.
- 53:54Speaker 2: I'm doing it all the time to be honest constantly.
- 53:56Speaker 2: I don't feel like a threat. I think I'm just
- 53:59Speaker 2: letting them know I'm behind them. But one honk, it's
- 54:02Speaker 2: an immediate I think it's very aggressive. You should never
- 54:05Speaker 2: do a one honk unless you're planning to get in
- 54:07Speaker 2: a fight pla person.
- 54:08Speaker 3: And people say that they just tap on their horns,
- 54:10Speaker 3: they don't. One honk to me does feel very aggressive
- 54:14Speaker 3: in the way actually that I now maybe am such
- 54:21Speaker 3: a delicate flower that occasionally in emails I think one
- 54:25Speaker 3: exclamation point instead of two is a statement.
- 54:28Speaker 2: Oh no, I mean this is inflation. I know because
- 54:31Speaker 2: there was a period when we didn't even have to
- 54:33Speaker 2: do one exclamation point post.
- 54:34Speaker 3: By the way, most straight guys do not do any.
- 54:37Speaker 2: I until probably six years ago, I did not use
- 54:40Speaker 2: exclamation points in anything.
- 54:42Speaker 3: I made it a point. At one point, I made
- 54:44Speaker 3: it a point to stop using exclamation points. I thought
- 54:48Speaker 3: I would be able to regain some kind of power,
- 54:51Speaker 3: be taken more seriously in this world. And I said
- 54:53Speaker 3: to myself, I am not doing this. It got to
- 54:58Speaker 3: I've just started feeling like a deck interesting.
- 55:01Speaker 2: Well now I feel like a dick if I don't
- 55:02Speaker 2: use them. Yeah, and I with exclamation points. And something
- 55:05Speaker 2: else that I've had to kind of catch myself on
- 55:07Speaker 2: is I'll respond sure, and people think that I'm just
- 55:11Speaker 2: like sure, I'm saying it in a positive way. Yep,
- 55:14Speaker 2: I'm saying sure, let's do it. But because I don't
- 55:16Speaker 2: have an exclamation point on it, and I actually think sure,
- 55:20Speaker 2: exclamation points seems like you're attacking the person. Yeah, I
- 55:24Speaker 2: don't know how. I don't know how to use the
- 55:25Speaker 2: word sure anymore. I agree it's not fair because I
- 55:28Speaker 2: don't speak in exclamation points.
- 55:30Speaker 3: No, I don't either. Uh hmm. Maybe I think you
- 55:33Speaker 3: do on occasion.
- 55:34Speaker 2: I think you have a healthy relationship with the exclamation
- 55:37Speaker 2: But in emails, if you don't use them, you are
- 55:39Speaker 2: being rude.
- 55:40Speaker 3: So I'll tell you. I am so tired of being
- 55:44Speaker 3: polite in emails and not polite. I shouldn't say that
- 55:48Speaker 3: I'm always polite in emails. I'm so tired of having
- 55:51Speaker 3: to if I need something to bookend it with really
- 55:57Speaker 3: great stuff like hey, oh my god, like this was
- 56:00Speaker 3: so great, thank you so much. I actually wasn't crazy
- 56:02Speaker 3: about the da da da da da, but it doesn't
- 56:04Speaker 3: matter because I know I will be and I do
- 56:06Speaker 3: it every time. And by the way, if I were
- 56:08Speaker 3: receiving it, i'd want it. I'd run to receive it
- 56:09Speaker 3: that way, right, of course, it's just dis exhausting.
- 56:12Speaker 2: You're much better at emailing than me. I'm a pretty
- 56:15Speaker 2: sloppy email I don't believe that. Oh, well, you have an.
- 56:18Speaker 3: Email just ma that's you know, we haven't. We haven't
- 56:21Speaker 3: had an email relationship, that's true.
- 56:23Speaker 2: I've had a lot of you know, feedback which I
- 56:26Speaker 2: have not received. Yeah, I've just continued to email however
- 56:29Speaker 2: I want, and people can deal with it. I did
- 56:33Speaker 2: think of something, Okay, let's hear it. I actually, and
- 56:35Speaker 2: I will say, this was deeply unfair of me to
- 56:37Speaker 2: just be like.
- 56:38Speaker 3: Now you have not at all, no, because you going
- 56:40Speaker 3: first gave me all the time in the world. I
- 56:42Speaker 3: think it's really impolite to invite me on your balcony
- 56:46Speaker 3: and not for a drink or something, and not treat
- 56:49Speaker 3: your balcony like part of your home. And by that
- 56:52Speaker 3: I mean if you want me to sit on your
- 56:55Speaker 3: patio furniture, Jesus, wipe it down. Can you just take
- 57:01Speaker 3: a broom, even a broom on the chair, even a
- 57:04Speaker 3: broom on the chair. I would be fine with now.
- 57:07Speaker 3: I don't remember when I did the podcast before and
- 57:10Speaker 3: you used to host it in your backyard. I don't
- 57:12Speaker 3: remember sitting on anything dusty. I don't remember there being
- 57:14Speaker 3: an issue, Brian.
- 57:15Speaker 2: That's because I cleaned them off before you came. Okay,
- 57:17Speaker 2: even though they're frequently cleaned, I had to make sure. Yeah,
- 57:20Speaker 2: it wasn't filthy, because I have some level of class.
- 57:24Speaker 3: Yeah, there was no dust on me. Nothing. If you're
- 57:27Speaker 3: going to invite me for a glass of wine out
- 57:29Speaker 3: onto your balcony, I just, first of all, thank you.
- 57:32Speaker 2: Sure you know, very nice.
- 57:33Speaker 3: Yeah, even though I probably brought the wine. Sure, lovely
- 57:37Speaker 3: view though, that's true. But just take a broom, a brush,
- 57:41Speaker 3: a wipe, anything.
- 57:43Speaker 2: Truly, get a dishrag anything. It takes ten seconds.
- 57:46Speaker 3: Yeah, put a towel down. I mean really, I'm baseline,
- 57:51Speaker 3: just the basics. But I don't like sitting on a
- 57:54Speaker 3: balcony and immediately sneezing or being covered in dust.
- 57:57Speaker 2: Oh right, the pillow ones if you sit down. I
- 58:00Speaker 2: don't know the polls correct, dust flies out, get rid
- 58:03Speaker 2: of them?
- 58:03Speaker 3: Yeah, who knows?
- 58:05Speaker 2: Those are full of like bird skin.
- 58:07Speaker 3: Just because something's all weather doesn't mean it shouldn't be cleaned.
- 58:10Speaker 2: No, absolutely, And I'll also say it's kind of satisfying
- 58:13Speaker 2: to clean that sort of thing because they do get
- 58:15Speaker 2: a little dirty or faster and you get to see
- 58:17Speaker 2: it all wipe off. That's right there, you go, a
- 58:19Speaker 2: job done. I thought you were going to say, if
- 58:21Speaker 2: you take me on to your balcony, kiss me. She's
- 58:25Speaker 2: also a nice thing to do.
- 58:26Speaker 3: Balconies are I mean, Juliette, you know what I mean.
- 58:29Speaker 2: She's a classic.
- 58:30Speaker 3: I bet she cleaned the first falcony. I'm sure she will.
- 58:33Speaker 3: She also had like a housekeeper or a nurse.
- 58:36Speaker 2: Of the nurse was probably wiping down the.
- 58:39Speaker 3: I think she was. I think it was thirteen. You know,
- 58:44Speaker 3: if we forget she was thirty, she was like seventeen
- 58:46Speaker 3: and she was thirteen. Okay, like that.
- 58:48Speaker 2: Bad boy Yeah, Claire Danes, Yeah, Leo, Leo Bass.
- 58:54Speaker 3: Bas clar Danes, Leo bas.
- 59:00Speaker 2: Well, you you played that perfectly. I guess it's not
- 59:04Speaker 2: really a game, but that's a very good rule, thank you.
- 59:06Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 59:06Speaker 2: I think we've invented two nice manners or reminded people.
- 59:11Speaker 2: We're trying to class things up for people.
- 59:13Speaker 3: It is so curious. So the second beep really is
- 59:15Speaker 3: where it gets friendlier.
- 59:16Speaker 2: Oh? Absolutely. I almost feel like cars should just have
- 59:19Speaker 2: two different horns.
- 59:20Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 59:21Speaker 2: One, it's like a warm you know, it's like with
- 59:23Speaker 2: those alarm clocks that are more of like a rather
- 59:26Speaker 2: than a negative. Yeah.
- 59:27Speaker 3: Yeah, just tap tap, I'm here. Yeah, why not.
- 59:30Speaker 2: Throw two horns? Give me options?
- 59:31Speaker 3: I love it.
- 59:32Speaker 2: One can be a train horn, one can be just
- 59:34Speaker 2: kind of a nice shoulder rub. I forgot to open
- 59:39Speaker 2: our final document. We're going to answer a listener question. Okay,
- 59:43Speaker 2: this says I am in a college opera program and
- 59:46Speaker 2: my classmates are not learning their music. How do I
- 59:49Speaker 2: subtly shame them and let them know that I'm better
- 59:51Speaker 2: than them while also encouraging them to get with the program?
- 59:54Speaker 2: And that's from Web?
- 59:55Speaker 3: Okay, Web, how do I subtly share? I mean, I
- 59:59Speaker 3: assume if you're lodging this complaint, you better be a
- 1:00:02Speaker 3: star in this class.
- 1:00:03Speaker 2: I know, what if he's what if he's like a
- 1:00:05Speaker 2: D plus? Yeah, and then suddenly he's totally delusional and
- 1:00:10Speaker 2: he's bossing people around.
- 1:00:11Speaker 3: You really really have to have everything backing it up,
- 1:00:14Speaker 3: because I have to say I've been on shows before
- 1:00:17Speaker 3: where there have been and I'm sure you have, Bridger.
- 1:00:21Speaker 3: There have been people who are lazier than others and
- 1:00:23Speaker 3: yet turn out incredible work when it comes down to it. Yes,
- 1:00:26Speaker 3: and it is a frustrating thing. Oh it's the worst.
- 1:00:29Speaker 2: See somebody who doesn't have to put in an effort.
- 1:00:31Speaker 3: And they're just naturally brilliantly gifted.
- 1:00:34Speaker 2: I've never experienced that in any area.
- 1:00:36Speaker 3: Of my life. Me neither. It always thinks work.
- 1:00:39Speaker 2: I'm breaking my back, Yeah, just to get out of bed,
- 1:00:42Speaker 2: that's it.
- 1:00:43Speaker 3: So I A. I hope you. I'm sure you are.
- 1:00:46Speaker 3: If you're a college opera student, A, you have to
- 1:00:50Speaker 3: be really talented. But how do you shame people for
- 1:00:54Speaker 3: some what do you?
- 1:00:55Speaker 2: I think you've got to be a shining stars. That's
- 1:00:57Speaker 2: the only way that web can do it is to
- 1:00:59Speaker 2: have the voice of an angel. Yea. Otherwise, what are
- 1:01:03Speaker 2: you going? You can't If you're saying it to shame them,
- 1:01:05Speaker 2: you're not really backing it up in any way.
- 1:01:08Speaker 3: Now, you're a nuisance, you could say, but see, you'd
- 1:01:11Speaker 3: have to make this lie up at least once a
- 1:01:13Speaker 3: month or every week. You could say, like, did you
- 1:01:15Speaker 3: guys hear the Renee Flemings coming next week? To hear us.
- 1:01:18Speaker 3: You know what I mean, if you had, if you
- 1:01:20Speaker 3: had some big opera star every week like waiting for
- 1:01:24Speaker 3: Gupman who has a seat at the table and then
- 1:01:26Speaker 3: just never shows up, they would maybe be shipshame.
- 1:01:28Speaker 2: Kind of become a known liar exactly, but slowly be
- 1:01:32Speaker 2: pushed out of the program and then get a regular job.
- 1:01:35Speaker 2: Because you've done this to yourself.
- 1:01:36Speaker 3: I can't name one other living person who's an opera.
- 1:01:39Speaker 2: The fact that you were able to get to Fleming,
- 1:01:41Speaker 2: that was it.
- 1:01:41Speaker 3: Because Pavaratti I think is dead, rip is he's probably.
- 1:01:46Speaker 2: I really I hope he is.
- 1:01:47Speaker 3: I really hope.
- 1:01:48Speaker 2: So that show off, Yeah, let's see alive and dead
- 1:01:54Speaker 2: in two thousand and seven, age seven, Oh on that
- 1:01:57Speaker 2: long ago. Yeah, he's been gone a while and long
- 1:01:59Speaker 2: enough for to forget that he died.
- 1:02:01Speaker 3: I guess. I mean he lives on, clearly, he lives on.
- 1:02:03Speaker 2: Yeah, but we are glad he is no longer a threat.
- 1:02:08Speaker 3: Yeah right, it's a rene lement to Renee Fleming's career exactly.
- 1:02:13Speaker 2: Is a close call, No, I think web First of all,
- 1:02:16Speaker 2: just mind your own business. You know, obviously you're feeling
- 1:02:19Speaker 2: very insecure about your voice and you're just trying to
- 1:02:23Speaker 2: bully other people to make yourself feel better. You're writing
- 1:02:25Speaker 2: into a podcast about other people's voices, trying to silence
- 1:02:30Speaker 2: other people. Right, I think that's again classless. I wouldn't
- 1:02:35Speaker 2: mind just losing Web as a listener entirely.
- 1:02:38Speaker 3: Sure you are throwing the book at this person.
- 1:02:42Speaker 2: Sorry, I don't know what to say. I've never been
- 1:02:44Speaker 2: in an opera program. I'm sure it's very difficult.
- 1:02:47Speaker 3: I'm sure it's pretty cutthroat. Yeah, and I.
- 1:02:49Speaker 2: Should have it should I ever join one. I should
- 1:02:51Speaker 2: have the option to be lazy and not do my
- 1:02:53Speaker 2: job without some Web nosing around.
- 1:02:57Speaker 3: I'm sure there's technique. I'm sure there's there a lot
- 1:02:59Speaker 3: of technique fault, but you either have it or you don't.
- 1:03:01Speaker 2: Yeah, you're not you're not building the opera voice.
- 1:03:03Speaker 3: No, you're maybe becoming more familiar with the classics.
- 1:03:07Speaker 2: Yes, no, no, No, nobody's just got it.
- 1:03:09Speaker 3: Yeah, I might.
- 1:03:11Speaker 2: Have you ever given me a chance?
- 1:03:13Speaker 3: Do you sing?
- 1:03:14Speaker 4: No?
- 1:03:14Speaker 2: Yeah, I can't even sing happy birthday?
- 1:03:16Speaker 3: Really, if someone were to ask me about your go
- 1:03:18Speaker 3: to karaoke song, I would have no idea. Oh my god,
- 1:03:21Speaker 3: yeah I would.
- 1:03:23Speaker 2: I mean, I would say private dancer. It's a good
- 1:03:29Speaker 2: karaoke song, but I cannot. I realized recently. I was like, oh,
- 1:03:32Speaker 2: a huge part of my brain is devoted to lyrics
- 1:03:35Speaker 2: of songs that I can't sing. Yeah, that I've listened
- 1:03:38Speaker 2: to and loved, But should the moment come for me
- 1:03:40Speaker 2: to sing them, it just won't.
- 1:03:42Speaker 3: Right because all I want to sing is like Mariah
- 1:03:44Speaker 3: and Whitney like that's obviously mine is a much lower pa. No, oh,
- 1:03:49Speaker 3: I would never. I would never, or like you know
- 1:03:51Speaker 3: what I mean. I the songs that gravitate you have
- 1:03:53Speaker 3: powerful vocals that I cannot deliver.
- 1:03:55Speaker 2: It right, and I just literally can't sing. So I've
- 1:03:59Speaker 2: just got a whole encyclopedia of words in my head
- 1:04:01Speaker 2: that can't be used. What a waste of a life.
- 1:04:04Speaker 3: That's terrible, A wasted life that's terrible. Well, speaking of
- 1:04:09Speaker 3: Eddie Redman.
- 1:04:09Speaker 2: You know now, of course Eddie didn't get invited.
- 1:04:13Speaker 3: He didn't Maybe next year, I doubt it.
- 1:04:20Speaker 2: Brian, I've had such a wonderful time with you. Oh
- 1:04:22Speaker 2: my god, I'm so happy when you're here. Thank you
- 1:04:25Speaker 2: for being here, thank you for having me listener. The
- 1:04:27Speaker 2: podcast is slowly creeping to a close. There's nothing you
- 1:04:33Speaker 2: can do. It's out of your hands. I'm taking control.
- 1:04:37Speaker 2: I'm turning it off. Get out of here. I love you, goodbye.
- 1:04:45Speaker 2: I said, No Gifts is an exactly right production. Our
- 1:04:49Speaker 2: senior producer is Ellis Nelson, and our episodes are beautifully
- 1:04:53Speaker 2: mixed by Ben Holliday. The theme song is by Miracle
- 1:04:56Speaker 2: Worker Amy Mann, and we couldn't do it without our booker,
- 1:05:00Speaker 2: Patrick Cottner. You must follow the show on Instagram at
- 1:05:03Speaker 2: I said no Gifts, that's where you're going to see
- 1:05:05Speaker 2: pictures of all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. And don't
- 1:05:08Speaker 2: you want to see the gifts? Well, I invited you, hear.
- 1:05:15Speaker 1: Gonta made myself perfectly clear. When you're a guest to
- 1:05:21Speaker 1: my home, you gotta come to me empty. And I said,
- 1:05:29Speaker 1: no gifts. You're our presences presents enough and I already
- 1:05:35Speaker 1: had too much stuff, So how do
- 1:05:38Speaker 2: You dare to survey me