Latest / SisterSmart Leadership / 14: Taking on More Responsibility at Work Won’t Get You Promoted

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14: Taking on More Responsibility at Work Won’t Get You Promoted · SisterSmart Leadership

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  I can't tell you how many women I talked to who are working harder and
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  harder in hopes of getting a promotion.
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  They keep their head down and wait for their work to speak for them,
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  except this isn't how it works.
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  This only leads you to burnout.
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  I see you hard worker.
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  And I want you to know that there is another way.
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  If you're tired of doing more and more and not getting the promotion you're
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  looking for, you're going to want to stay tuned because in this episode
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  we're going to be talking about why this doesn't work and what you can do instead.
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  I'm Jill Avey, a career success coach, and this is Sister Smart Leadership, the
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  show that explores how women can rise from director to vice president and beyond
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  by fully leaning into their feminine energy as their biggest advantage.
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  Let's get you one step closer to the recognition and promotion you deserve.
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  I was once in this position myself.
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  I was an ambitious marketing director trying to get
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  recognized for a promotion to VP.
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  I won awards for my marketing and I got feedback that I
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  was a vital part of the team.
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  While I worked closely with the executive team on a regular basis, it
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  became apparent to me that I was not going to be considered one of them.
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  So when I left to get my MBA at Columbia business school, I was pretty shocked
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  when they replaced me with four people.
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  Why hadn't I been able to advocate for myself to get additional
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  staff when I tried so many times?
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  What was I doing that kept me locked in a job with too much to do and too
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  few resources like so many other women?
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  Fast forward almost a decade to when I became a coach and I started
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  doing research to put together my women's leadership program.
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  This is when I started finally being able to put these pieces together.
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  To create the sister smart leadership program I spoke to women at all different
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  levels and different stages in their careers from senior managers all the way
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  to CEOs, and I asked them what it was that they struggled with in their careers.
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  And as I listened to the women and to the men I spoke to as well,
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  I saw seven themes bubble up.
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  The interesting part about this is that only six of the themes were
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  identified by the women themselves.
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  The last theme that I observed is what I call the busyness trap.
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  I saw this behavior because it was different from what the men that I'd
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  worked with over the years had done.
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  It was something that I had personally struggled with in my career.
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  And even as I overcame that challenge, I hadn't necessarily identified it
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  as a problem or given it a name.
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  You see, I was once caught in the business trap myself.
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  There was one point in my career where I was a director, busy director,
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  traveling 25 percent of my time, and simultaneously I was the board
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  president of a nonprofit and I was the marketing director for another one.
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  On top of that, I had a side hustle, which was a meditation cushion business.
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  And I not only did all the marketing and product production, but I also pick
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  packed and shipped all the orders myself.
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  And I did all of this while I managed to work out four times a week,
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  spend time with my elderly dogs and keep my relationships going with my
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  husband, my family, and my friends.
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  Let me tell you, it was a go go lifestyle.
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  The problem was is that while I was getting everything done, I wasn't showing
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  up in the way I wanted to for anything.
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  I often ran late on projects and I often had to accept quality that was less
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  than what I really hoped for myself and for others because of that time crunch.
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  But little by little, I started to unravel all the obligations that I had
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  because I learned that every time I said yes, that meant I was saying no
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  to something I'd already committed to.
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  I learned that while people believed in me and had confidence that I would get it
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  all done, it caused a lot of stress that was totally unnecessary and it degraded
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  the trust that I had with my colleagues.
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  The thing is I was doing all this extra work in hopes of getting the promotion
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  that I wanted, but I found that the more I took off my plate, the better
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  I was able to perform at the more important things that were actually
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  going to get me where I wanted to go.
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  And pretty soon I was launching the company's most successful product ever,
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  which paved the way for me to become a VP.
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  The lesson I learned from this is that taking on more
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  doesn't necessarily help you.
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  It's not what will get you more respect or create stronger relationships.
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  And it doesn't help you create impact.
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  Taking on more makes you indispensable in the role that you're in,
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  which then keeps you stuck there.
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  It results in comments that I heard back as that marketing director, like,
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  You're so good at what you do, why would you want to do something else?
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  After that experience of being replaced by four people, I decided
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  that I needed a new frame of mind.
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  So I started looking around for inspiration since no one
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  teaches you this stuff in school.
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  I found that inspiration I needed in the form of a working mom, Leslie.
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  We were peers and we had two drastically different working styles.
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  As the one in charge of innovation, I tended to run around the office all day
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  making things happen and developing my relationships and creating innovations
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  through direct in person meetings.
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  As a company market researcher, I struggled to focus on my
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  analytical work until after the office got quiet around 4 PM.
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  And I would then work till 7 or so getting my work done while the office was quiet.
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  And I often got called out to dinner with the CEO, which would then have me working
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  even later, arriving home to you know, at 11 or so to a less than happy husband.
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  Leslie, on the other hand, had two kids in daycare.
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  So she got in the office at 8am sharp and she left at 5pm sharp or she
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  faced the fines from her daycare, giving her what's called a commitment
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  device in behavioral science.
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  So she sat at her desk and did everything by email.
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  She worked far in advance and with solid processes, templates,
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  and checklists in place.
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  She was so organized.
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  She did everything well in advance so that she didn't have to pull
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  any favors and didn't have to have any discussions about things.
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  Her work just seemed to come off like a well oiled machine.
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  And I noticed how her hard stop and start times made it so that she
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  had to have these firm boundaries that were in place about what she
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  would do and what she wouldn't do.
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  And I also noticed how this gave her a lot more respect.
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  Because she respected her own time.
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  Other people respected her time.
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  So when I went to my next job, I instituted the same
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  sort of boundaries on my time.
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  I didn't have a daycare to give me a commitment device.
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  So I used, I was scheduling a workout in the evenings, kind of the early evenings
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  to force my timely departure every day.
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  So I found that once I had these guardrails for myself, that it forced
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  me to be more careful about what I was taking on and that introspection
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  time that I needed to discern which projects were worth my time, helped
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  me to see how I was making an impact or not with the work that I did.
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  So when you take time to reflect, you can start to position yourself
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  for those more important projects that give you the opportunity to
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  be seen for your leadership skills instead of just your technical skills.
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  One of my clients had experience with this busyness trap working
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  for an ambitious startup.
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  In this startup, there is always exponentially more work
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  that needs to be done than can be done almost by definition.
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  And her team developed software involved in safety.
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  So this is, you know, quality is job one in this kind of role.
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  This means that when you get busy, you can't send out product that's less than
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  your best like you can in many businesses.
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  You have to continually work to make it right, no matter how long it takes.
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  And because she does excellent work, she continued to get more
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  and more piled on her plate.
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  Yet, when she looked around, she saw that no one else had the workload that
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  she did, and many even had larger teams with still didn't have as much workload.
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  This is a common situation that many women get into where they're handling
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  much heavier workloads with fewer resources than their male counterparts.
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  And when we diagnosed this problem, we found that the big issue for her was
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  that she was doing a lot of analysis work to figure out exactly what her workload
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  plan needed in terms of headcount.
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  And she knew that her workload needs down to the week and hour, which was great.
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  However, the other leaders were totally overestimating what they
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  needed and her boss knew it.
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  So he assumed that she was doing the same thing.
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  So he never gave her authorization for more people.
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  But when she took him through all of this and, you know, took him step by
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  step through her work plan, then she was able to show him exactly how she'd
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  come up with the numbers that she had.
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  And he took her requests much more seriously and she got the extra people.
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  And this also helped her boss see what her project management skills look like.
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  So it helped him to understand how she was able to run her projects more
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  smoothly and foresee problems before they became fires, which helped her
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  build her credibility even further.
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  So it was after all of this that she received another promotion as well.
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  Making that transition out of the busyness trap can seem scary at
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  first, so it can help to think through that mindset of a leader.
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  So here's some things that you want to consider as you start to shift
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  your mindset to be a senior leader.
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  First, successful leaders aren't running around with their pants on fire.
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  They manage their time well so that they can seem cool, calm, and collected.
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  Busyness is not a badge of honor.
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  More and more, it can be seen that you are over your head or insecure.
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  And second, successful senior leaders work on strategic initiatives that are
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  going to make an impact on the business.
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  Third, they spend time thinking.
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  They research and develop their own opinion about trends that will affect
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  the team's and the company's performance, both inside and outside of the business.
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  And they think at an enterprise level.
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  Fourth, they spend time and money developing their leadership skills.
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  They realize that their own development is a limiting factor for their team's
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  performance, that they need to continually develop themselves emotionally to
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  lead at higher and higher levels.
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  Fifth, they spend a lot of time building relationships.
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  Senior leaders know that they need others to succeed.
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  They have to have strong relationships built on trust to get things done.
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  And six, most of their time will be spent working on the
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  business versus in the business.
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  This means they do the more strategic work rather than the tactical work of getting
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  things done and checking off to do lists.
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  And seven, they delegate well by empowering others to bring their brilliant
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  thinking and expertise to the business.
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  Delegation is important if you want to be seen as someone who makes an impact.
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  You're going to have to spend more of your time working on high visibility and what
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  I call promotable projects that are going to be noticed because of their impact.
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  And you'll want to spend less time on making everything run super smoothly.
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  This is because you need to start acting like an executive before you
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  get the chance to be that executive.
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  Men get promoted based on their potential while women get promoted
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  based on their performance.
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  And this means that you have to start working at that level before people
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  see you as a leader at that next level.
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  So start looking at the executives around you.
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  How are they acting and what are they thinking about on a day to day basis?
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  What do you need to stop doing?
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  And over the years I've noticed there are some things that women do need to
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  let go of if they're going to start operating at that next executive level.
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  So first you need to let go of being helpful and people pleasing.
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  If you're like many women, when you start to look at it, you'll notice this
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  behavior in things you do every day.
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  I do myself.
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  And while you may not be able to let go of it a hundred percent, remember that at
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  the executive level, you're not expected to be helpful and make everyone feel good.
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  Sure.
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  You may have the opportunity to be able to do that from time to time, but you
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  should not be expecting that of yourself.
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  Second, you cannot be the go to person.
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  A lot of us pride ourselves on being that person who knows to
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  get how to get everything done.
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  And chances are you've been rewarded for it.
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  So it might be hard to let go of, but as you move up the ladder, this
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  is simply not possible anymore.
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  You'll be leading people who know how to get everything done instead.
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  Next, you have to let go of being the expert.
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  As you start to operate at the enterprise level, you're going to be managing the
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  experts, not being the expert yourself.
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  This means that you have to have a lot of confidence to be able to
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  say that you don't know something when somebody asks you a question.
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  Top executives don't know everything about every detail that goes on in the business.
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  Sure.
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  They're very smart and they show their intelligence by asking great questions
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  rather than knowing all the answers.
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  So take pride in saying that that isn't something you handle
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  personally, but you can check it out with your team to find out.
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  Fourth, you need to let go of needing outside validation.
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  The higher up you go, the less likely you are to get praise
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  for the work that you're doing.
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  So instead you're going to be giving that praise to others.
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  And this means that you need to get your own validation from
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  inside, not from outside forces.
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  And fifth, you have to let go of making other people feel better.
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  Women do this by being funny or nice or otherwise accommodating.
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  When you're an executive, you need to accept that sometimes people
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  aren't going to be happy with you.
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  There are going to be unpopular things that you had to do and
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  you need to be okay with that.
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  So we've covered a lot of ground here in this episode.
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  I've shared my story of getting caught in the business trap and some of the
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  lessons that my clients and I have learned about how to get out of this situation
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  where you keep working harder and harder and it doesn't get you anywhere.
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  And I've given you 7 mindset shifts to think about when considering about how
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  you're going to become more promotable and I've given you 5 things you can stop doing
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  now to be seen as senior leader material.
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  I like to end each episode with three shifts you can make today and start
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  implementing what you've learned on how to get out of the busyness trap.
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  So first I would like you to list out all the responsibilities that you have
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  currently both at home and at work.
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  Next, look at each one and identify, is this a promotable responsibility
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  or a non promotable responsibility?
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  And finally, let's make a plan for how you can start to shift
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  into more promotable work.
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  You're going to want to listen to the next two episodes because I'll be
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  sharing some ways to do that in those.
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  What did you find insightful from this episode?
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  What is one small thing that you can let go of?
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  Small steps are always best to start with.
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  So let us know in the comments what that one thing is that you'd like to let go of
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  next if you're watching this on YouTube.
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  Are you ready to get out of the business trap and clear your career for takeoff?
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  If you're looking to get promoted from the director level to the VP level, or
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  if you've been recently promoted to the VP level, you might want to check out my
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  masterclass called from director to VP for shifts that women need to get promoted.
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  In this free workshop, I'll take you through what it looks like to act like
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  an executive at the VP level in much more detail than I've had time to cover here.
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  This is for you if you're a female director or VP who feels stuck in
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  her role and wants to develop a fulfilling and impactful career
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  without working long hours.
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  If you want to dive deeper into women's leadership and how to
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  move up in your career, subscribe either on YouTube or wherever you
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  listen to your favorite podcasts.
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  I'm on a mission to help more women get into leadership and stay there.
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  And if that's aligned with you, I'd love to have you part of this community and
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  tune into more episodes on sister smart leadership that will support you in
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  becoming the leader that you want to be.
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  If you're ready to fully lean into your feminine leadership and get promoted
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  from director to vice president and beyond, hit that subscribe button so
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  you'll get all the episodes to come and check out the recommended video here
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  to see how women are rising up without playing by the old rules that built these
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  male dominated industries and systems.