Latest / OCCULTINARIUM / AmeLynn's Corner of Chaos - BEP 1 - Making Childhood Dreams Happen

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AmeLynn's Corner of Chaos - BEP 1 - Making Childhood Dreams Happen · OCCULTINARIUM

• Lynn: Hello, we are the voices of the Occultinarium. Amelie: with Amelie. Lynn: and Lynn. to Amelynn's corner of where well not entirely sure yet what we're gonna do but we felt like doing spin-off where we're just talking about whatever comes to mind kind of roughly based on a topic. I think that was plan. Amelie: Yeah, a ⁓ chaos, which is maybe a little bit odd, but that's what chaos is. ⁓ Lynn: Yes, slightly chaotic order, order in I mean, mean, had sessions, of unofficial sessions. So we just met up and we would talk and then we would start talking about really interesting topics. And then we would be like, how did we not record this? So now we it, ⁓ AmeLynn's Corner Chaos now. Amelie: corner of chaos. Lynn: and see what comes up. I mean, we're still at the very beginning of the Occultinarium podcast. So we've just recorded a few episodes. Four, I think. Amelie: Yeah, and yeah, it's good to reflect on the episodes, I guess, and also... Yeah, and also kind of like go through the crazy things that we've been talking about and... not. Lynn: Mm. On and off camera. Yes. So, yeah. Amelie: Yeah, I mean, was a... because we had like, we had pretty long sessions about such random topics that were so interesting, but we never recorded it and we thought like, there must be some other weirdos out there that would so much appreciate. And even like, to get your head spinning and be like, ⁓ my god, I've also been through this, ⁓ my god, this is crazy. ⁓ Lynn: Mm. Mm. you Yeah, I just like just listen to crazy people talking about crazy things. mean, I guess I mean, I don't know what your motivation was to starting a podcast in the first place. ⁓ I just remember yesterday was yesterday. Yeah, no, actually was today in the morning because I was watching a show, Tokyo Diner, actually, but a midnight diner, the Tokyo edition. ⁓ it was an episode with a radio show host. So this is like, you know, the 80s or 90s or whatever. So he's like this radio show host and he always plays at midnight and then you know there's these characters and they're like listen and then they feel like you know this kind of sense of belonging or whatnot. And then I remember like when I was a child when radio was still a thing. I mean I loved the radio and I had a phase where I like I felt like I wanted to be a radio host at some point you know I thought it was so cool because they always seems to have so much fun. You know, sitting in the studio and then you choose because back then, know, still choose the music you put on, you know, and it's like, what are we going to show the listeners today? And there was a variety not like it is today. I'm old. But. Yeah, yeah. vampire. ⁓ Amelie: I mean I'm older I understand completely understand I was really the same when I was a kid or younger, whatever, like me and my bestie. What we used to do, used to, it started with us recording radio shows. So we had like, I wish my mom had those tapes because I would love to listen to them. And we used to do like different characters and just having like radio shows. Lynn: Hmm? Right. Amelie: Then there was a time when I'd like force my parents to buy a video camcorder, like camcorder, like video, like VHS tape kind of thing. And they did. So then we started doing like recording actual like shows. So we used to like dress up as different characters, I don't know, really characters ⁓ and interview each other on camera. And then we started doing like little Lynn: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Wow. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Amelie: films like little ⁓ horror films because that was like I always wanted to like make horror films. So I mean we were really young so it was like blood was like a blend of like ketchup and ⁓ other ⁓ things but you know like little snippets and things. I know that some of them my mom still have somewhere but ⁓ I always been a little bit like that. It wasn't ⁓ wasn't the fact that I it wasn't it wasn't anything nothing about like Lynn: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Amelie: I would love to be famous and be like an actor or something. I just really loved the process of like filming or recording. And I did it as like school work as well when we had to like, everyone had like assignments, they have to like pick a topic of some sort. And I remember a few times I asked like, is it, could I make a movie? Can I make a movie? And a few times they said yes. Lynn: Hmm. Hmm. Yeah, yeah. Hmm. Amelie: So as I've done that, that was really lame, but it's fun, right? Lynn: No, that's so fascinating. Yeah, yeah. That's funny that we've, yeah. Yeah, for me it's also, ⁓ right? mean, ⁓ just I didn't have like, it was just like me and myself and I was just thinking about it, know, because I just, I just like the vibe and I felt like, you know, it'd be fun to make jokes, you know, for people or whatever. ⁓ Amelie: So think it's very similar. Very, very similar, yeah. Yeah, yeah and I always loved because I used to have my favorite shows listening to the radio that played the kind of music that I liked and I was one of those kids that liked to record the songs the radio because they had the newest hits before it hit the record shops. So I used to love to like record them as well and love the way you you listen to a song and then Lynn: Mm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Amelie: they had like an input of like, oh, the song is so great or something or new. They always said something about the artist or something. And yeah, I really enjoyed that. And what I also used to do, I used to have like two cassette recorders. So I used to record on one and play the song on the other. And I used to sing with a song and like, Lynn: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Mm. ⁓ wow. Amelie: So because like I loved singing, I used to sing since I was like really really young and I just loved singing and that was like my present for my mum and just thinking about it is like why did I want to torture her? must have sounded absolutely awful but I really enjoyed it and I was just like in my my childish mind Lynn: Mm. Aww. Amelie: I thought that I did sound just like the artist, just as good, you know, really good. I'm great singer. Lynn: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. Amelie: Did you used to do somethings randomly? Lynn: I mean, I was random. Yeah, everything my whole life. ⁓ OK, so today, guess we're going to talk about childhood. We're going to start there. That's great. ⁓ mean, yes, childhood. I ⁓ when you say random thing, I remember one episode ⁓ ⁓ God, what was the song called? Did you know like the Macarena song? ⁓ Amelie: Yeah. the random things you used to do as a child. yeah, yeah. Lynn: where you do like the dance. Yeah, so yeah, so this song was just fresh out and I was probably, I'm gonna tell everybody how old I am, that's fine. I guess I was like eight or seven or something. I was just going to school and I remember the song was out and then I thought I was gonna surprise my mom. Amelie: Yeah, that I could never remember. Lynn: So I put myself into a costume, not a fancy costume, was kind of like like a sports, know, like a onesie kind of thing, like all sportsy, but I wouldn't usually wear it like so it was like an whole outfit. And then when my mom came home, I would like put on the song of like, I would do stuff like that for my mama. I remember one time it was winter and then I would go outside behind the house. There was like this open space for like a meadow. I built a snowman for her and it was a big one so it took quite a long time and I was so like happy building it and Actually that memories ⁓ connected with childhood trauma because ⁓ was building the snowman. I was so happy ⁓ And I expected my mom to come home, right? And then suddenly my grandma comes home and I'm like, you know, like but like where's mom? You know, like I just built like a snowman for her and I was just really I just had this you know, like when you get really happy or have this expectation or anticipation as a child for something to happen. it's just and for me, it was just like my mom being proud of me or my mom like being happy or whatnot. Right. For what I did. And then granny's like, oh, yeah, no, I don't remember what she said. But basically what happened was that my mom was in an accident with her car. So she did not come home that day or the day after. She was fine. But she she had to be in hospital for like a day or two or so. Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: So, you know, I was like super happy building a snowman for my mom. She crashed her car because it was really slippery outside and stuff. She crashed her car and I, childhood ⁓ was like thinking there was a connection obviously that I did something big and grand was happy and then my mom almost died, you know. ⁓ Amelie: Have you been? have you have you built snowmen since or have you been feeling like Lynn: That's a good question. I have no memory of snowmen after that. do remember I built a snowcat when I was in my teenage. We moved to another place. I remember there was a snowcat at some point, but I don't think it was such a big thing anymore with the snowmen. I probably was a bit traumatized from that for a little while. Amelie: Yeah. Yeah, you would be as a kid though. Lynn: Mmm. Amelie: Yeah, I don't really remember myself buildings. Yeah, I used to build some and I never made, it was never like a big thing because we never had a garden. So it was always like in the middle of nowhere. But I used to like rolling the snowballs as big as they come until I could not move them anymore. Lynn: Yeah. rhyme. Hmm. Mm-hmm Yeah, that was in Sweden I'm assuming or yeah ⁓ Amelie: Yeah, yeah, that was in Sweden, yeah, yeah. I mean, there's no snow in the UK, seriously. You get snow maybe like once every four or five years for a few days. I miss the snow, I do. Lynn: Yeah. Mmm. Mmm. Yeah. You gotta come over, like all of you guys just come over and crash on my couch. In winter. Yeah. Yes. Well, my cat sleeps with me, sorry, but you know, you can have the dog. ⁓ yeah, childhood stuff. I don't know. There so much. Amelie: Yeah, yeah, sleep with the animals. Okay, that's fine. don't know, there's so many things I think about from childhood or from when you were younger, that you have a certain perception that things were a certain way, but then when you think back at it, it's like, how stupid was I? I don't know. Lynn: Mm. Mm. Like what? Amelie: It's really, it's really stupid. I really had like this thing with my freckles like I said before, because I always had freckles as a kid and I used to get bullied for that like it's so stupid because it's just freckles. ⁓ But remember like my cousin, because I don't have any siblings, but my cousin she's half a year younger, think half a year younger than I am. So we're basically the same age. Lynn: Mm. Mm. Amelie: And she's also an only child, so when we were very little, we used to spend a lot of time together. And she felt so sorry for me. So she went out with her mom, because mom was like, she loved shopping, So she came, we used to hang out with my, at my grandma's a lot. And one day she came and she gave me this cream that was supposed to be like for freckles. Lynn: gosh. ⁓ Amelie: I have no idea, like there's some kind of like shop thing and just felt so sorry for me. She's like, I got you this cream just so you can like get rid of your freckles because it makes you so sad. And just little things like that. It's very sweet. But like, it's such stupid thing. ⁓ Like it's freckles, but I can't see as much anymore because obviously I'm like... Lynn: Yeah. Mm. Amelie: in the UK when there's no sun. ⁓ Lynn: Do you remember you were a child? ⁓ you wanted to be when you... Like you remember like the earliest thing that you ever said anything about what you wanted to become? If you ever had like some sort of dream or... Yeah? Tell me about it. Yeah. Amelie: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wanted to become an astronaut. I can't really say that word very well. Astronaut. Astronaut. Astro-astronaut. Astronaut. Astronaut. ⁓ ⁓ no, let's not go there. I very, I must have been, I must have been like five or six or something. Lynn: Right. Yeah. Amelie: ⁓ real dad, he things were electronic music and sci-fi and stuff like that. And they used always watch on TV all the movies and things and he watched quite a few times Space Odyssey and it's a very up right? But I must have been like five or six and was watching it too, but it wasn't, I was like playing and watching it, but I was just, you when you play and then you watch something and you get fascinated as a kid and you just like, and I just like, ⁓ me, it was just so cool that they're like out of ⁓ ⁓ not on earth and it's just like this like almost clean environment, but it's so different and Lynn: Yeah. Amelie: And that got me thinking of like, ⁓ my God, I would love to see like the earth from like above. ⁓ just got really into like that, like, I don't know why, I really do not know why. Now just like, it must be horrible to be like stuck on a spaceship somewhere, like in this like ⁓ very environment and ⁓ having Hal talking to you and. Lynn: Alright. Hmm. Amelie: That is probably why I'm so afraid of like robots. It's probably because of that movie as well. it's like, ⁓ somehow I just like, I just really wanted to become like, just to float in nothingness. And that's probably I'm so fascinated about like void and black holes chaos and these probably comes from there. But I do not like robots. Lynn: Mm. Amelie: What about yourself? Lynn: I'm gonna talk about... Did you ever try one of those floating chambers? Or one of these things where you can kind of... In the sense deprivation tanks where you just float? Amelie: I wanted to do that years and years and years ago with my friend and we were like, yeah, let's do it. Cause she was really into it as well. But I never got around to it because then the lockdowns happened and then now I moved away from London. now I'm just like, I'd love to do that. That's something I think I need to like check where I can do it somewhere here because I think I'll just, I think I will enjoy that. And maybe it sounds scary, but yeah. Lynn: Yeah. ⁓ yeah. ⁓ yeah. Mm. year. Yeah, me too. I've not tried it yet. Nobody like that. No. Yes. It's all gonna separate tanks. I'm just like, just gonna space out and have our ⁓ little trips. Probably. ⁓ can imagine. Yeah. Amelie: Maybe like one day we all meet up and then we just do it. Yeah. Yeah, I just love the feeling of like not feeling. But you just like there in your own, in your own head. And I guess it sounds scary to most people. ⁓ assume it sounds very scary, but it just sounds so relaxing ⁓ be there with your own thoughts. Lynn: Yeah. Mm. Yeah, yeah, I guess it really has to do with how comfortable you are with your own thoughts really, right? So if you always, I mean the personality type who for example always needs to be, I have a coworker like that I think, so I was like a person who always needs to be talking and engaging with people and always be like a very extrovert but like always like dang, dang, dang, always like something, some input. Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: maybe not be very comfortable when there's suddenly just silence and then cannot feel anything either, know, like their senses just go away. And I'm just like, you know, it's like, ⁓ that would be so great to just like, let it all go, surrender, you know, big thing. Just like. Amelie: Yeah. ⁓ I just want to know what will my mind see? Because it's dark, no sound, you're just floating around so obviously your brain is going to come up with some random stuff. I bet it's quite trippy, I'm quite sure it must be a bit trippy. Lynn: Mm. Mm. Yeah. Yeah, I bet. I bet it will be. I people will show up. ⁓ Amelie: Sorry, don't... just like, I don't know, oh, will he just fall asleep? And I don't know. Lynn: Yeah, I mean like ⁓ example, ⁓ have friend here, she's doing body therapy, ⁓ so a way massage, but a very particular like kind or type of massage, so she works with a ⁓ good because I actually don't know the English word for it, but maybe you know from Swedish, binneverv. No? Let me see. Amelie: Sorry? Sorry? No, I mean, it's very... know a lot of words, but ⁓ might be very specific. Lynn: No, it's so specific. It's like, oh yeah, just a connective tissue of the body. There we go. Yeah, so. Yeah, and I've just had like two sessions with her, but it's like you really start floating as well. I started floating because she just I don't know. It's very hard to describe, but it's so. It just feels so good. But I mean, also, you know, you things happen like, you know, she she gets stuff going and. Amelie: Right there. Yeah. I'd love to try one of those massages to be honest Lynn: energy flow and obviously she's she's also witch and she has a Reiki degree or gradient so she she uses like several techniques when she when she does her body therapy but she's really good shout out to her if she ever oh why she ever listens to this like this is for you drop in the comments if you're Norway and want to get a session I can set you up because she doesn't work enough Amelie: If I ever come. If I'm ever in Norway again, I'll need to book some time with her. Yeah, I'd love to. I'd love to have like connective tissue. I'll also hear a lot about like, what is it called? Like the, now I remember, like these. Lynn: Yeah. Yeah. Mm. Amelie: these lymph nodes, not lymph nodes, but there's like this toxic, toxin, toxins, like you had people like just like somehow massage and then like get, I don't know what it is that they're doing, but it sounds great. You know, massaging your face and stuff, which should be easy to do it yourself, but it's like, I don't know. Lynn: Is it the lymph nodes? Right. Okay. Take it out. ⁓ Mm-hmm. Yeah, right. But you know, mean, there's things you can massage on your own body, but then you cannot really or I feel like I cannot really go out of my body the way that I do like somebody else massages me because I'm still like focusing because I'm you know, my brain is focused and my hands are focused and the hands get tired and stuff. So I'm not in this ⁓ that's it's different. Yeah. Yeah. Amelie: Yeah, you can't relax with Lynn: I got a face massage once by somebody I met ⁓ on a kind of a Renaissance fair thing. So we were all dressed up as, know, like were medieval age people and he was in our camp and he's like, hey, I do facial massage and everybody, yeah, me, yeah, me, me, me. And I'm like, yeah, OK. And it was just half an hour just my face. And I was just like, yeah, this feels really nice. It's kind of weirdly intimate on the face. I ⁓ but it was really nice. And then it was like. Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: Will you do me? Nobody ever does me. And I'm like, I was shot. I was also kind of shy back then. So I was like, no, I don't know what to do. You know, so I flunked out. Amelie: is very intimate to touch people's faces if you're not used to it. used to do makeup for a while, but in beginning it was like, it is very intimate because ⁓ when you're so close, you see every pore, every little thing on someone's face and then you're touching ⁓ them. ⁓ It I Lynn: Hmm. Yeah. Amelie: Yeah, I don't know, maybe some people don't find that weird or anything, but yeah, it took me a while to like get used to being so up close to people because I get, I always, I never want to hurt them. So I've always been like a little bit too gentle maybe sometimes. So it's very like, you don't want to. So I'm thinking like massaging it, then you have to put a little bit more like. Lynn: Hmm ⁓ Mm. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Amelie: forced to it, so that must be even stranger. But yeah, is being so up close to people, it's an experience if you've never done that. Specifically to someone that you don't know. Lynn: Yeah, yeah, I bet. bet. Back to childhood We the rabbit hole queens. I ⁓ first that I know of because I like what ⁓ the things I remember myself or like things like I want to become. I think I wanted to work with animals and I did that. So I'm doing that now. It's great. I just had imagined, you know, envisioned that I wanted to be like a zookeeper or something, you know, like or Amelie: ⁓ yeah. Lynn: Or more like this idea like you see like in Australia or you know where like people like actually work with the animals kind of in like the reserves, you know, where they're kind of wild, half wild. ⁓ it feels more like you have to gain the respect of the animal rather than them being in a cage or whatnot ⁓ stuff like that. Or like a wildlife ranger or something, you know, where you just advocate the animals and stuff. that was always been kind of a thing that I wanted to do when I was young. ⁓ But the thing that The first thing I ever said that was in kindergarten and my mom told me this but that's when they went around and they just asked all the kids what they wanted to be when they grow up. So I was like maybe three years old, teeny tiny. And the boys are like firemen and police and you know like all the cool stuff, the cool guy stuff and all the girls are not all but most of the girls want to be like princess or ⁓ a nurse or you know the stuff and then they asked me and I'm like I'm gonna be a witch! So... And fast forward, you know, 25 or so years and I'm like, ⁓ good in the way. ⁓ You ⁓ So was kind of funny. Yeah, so now I'm working with animals. Yeah. Yeah. But that was that was very much like me reorienting my own career actually. That was a few ago because I've always worked in sales and... Amelie: I you are working with animals aren't you? Anyways, and you're a witch, mean. ⁓ Lynn: I was good in sales, but it's not what I thrive with. Also, I need to trust the product if I want to sell it. So I was often working with things that I did kind of trust, but it's still like this whole superficial thing and, you know, try this new one because it's even better than the old because, you know, it's like, it's just not me. Yeah. Always putting on faces. was very, it's very tiring for somebody with like, yeah, with... Amelie: Yeah. Yeah, trust me. Lynn: ADD or ODD or what not. It's ⁓ and work what not it's and witchy it's just like no ⁓ so Amelie: Yeah, I hear you. I hear you, I completely understand where you're coming from. I've been in sales as well and I survived three years in Harrods and a year in Harvard-Nichols and three years in Liberty. Harrods was like, you said putting on a mask, I'm like, ⁓ Lynn: Yeah. yeah. Mmm. ⁓ my gosh, yeah, no, I don't miss it. Amelie: I understand what you're talking about. But it's... I mean, I know that you don't work with animals in wilderness, like you said, but it's still close-ish and you don't have to up-sail and sail things. You're just helping them. Lynn: Mm. Yeah, I know. Yeah. Yeah, it's the next best thing. Not much, no. I still have to tell owners or explain prices to owners, know, as a vet tech. yeah, yeah. Yeah, but now it's really good. It's just, yeah, a few years ago, it's just like, I don't want to do this anymore. And I actually went into this thought of what did I want to be as a child, you know, because I felt like if there's anything that I could do. ⁓ Amelie: Well yeah, obviously yeah. Lynn: ⁓ And as a child you have this innocence about you, but you're kind of more connected with what you truly want I feel so I was like what did I want to be when I was a child and then some of those things were like things that are not really attainable or Seem not attainable right now. Like for example helicopter pilot I would love to be that but there's a lot that goes into becoming that Money, for example, I don't have so if I the lottery else, maybe start, you know, maybe I'll do that but So that was a no, no helicopter pilot, but working with animals. I started ⁓ training or education as dog trainer, first of all, and became a dog trainer and worked as a dog trainer for sort of full time for a few years. But that really enough to, it was enough to get like butter on the bread basically, but not much more than that. And then I just kept out, you know, applications to things. suddenly I land a job as a vet tech sort of assistant we call it here so it's not ⁓ nothing you are you to school for but you're being trained on the job basically for the things you do so now I'm like yeah Amelie: So it's like an apprentice, like a position, like a junior position, but it's also like an apprenticeship, but like hairdressers do a little bit like that too, that you're like, you're working, but they also, teaching you to do some things. Lynn: Yeah... Kind of, but... Yeah, in a way, but even like in an apprenticeship, you normally you're like in the queue for the actual job, right? And as a vet assistant or like a vet tech here, you're not you just you're basically doing what you're never going to be a veterinarian, you know, unless you go study. So in that sense, you're being trained to do certain things that somebody assisting a vet like the vet would do but you're not fully trained so it's like you know there's a whole like ⁓ ranks and a hacking order or packing order in this so I'm on the bottom and that's okay it's a very small clinic and everybody like it's a very nice team so so it's great yeah I like it very much Amelie: ⁓ dear. Yeah, I feel like when it comes to work, I really don't mind being the manager or the team leader and stuff. I absolutely don't like that. When it comes the job that you to have, the 9-5 job, which is ⁓ such a lie because don't work even to 5 anymore. It's ⁓ we're late. Lynn: Mm. Amelie: just feel like I just want to have a job that I can do easily I do not want to have too much responsibility ⁓ like people in the team. ⁓ like back in because I'm in position now for quite a long time and I remember like it's ⁓ been a times they're like Amelie don't you want to be a team leader? And I'm like ⁓ no, no. So do make me, I do not want to have the Lynn: Mm. No, get the hell out. Amelie: don't want to have like, I can help, I can help, like, but you're doing it anyway. I don't want to. I just don't want to because as soon as you I feel that I have that pressure on me, I get really stressed and I don't want it. Lynn: Mm. Mm. Hmm. It's kind of like what I'm thinking of like superheroes and stuff I used to have like a phase with you know, liking superheroes and all that and for me like I like as a child I've seen like I saw myself as kind of like the superhero of course in my like retellings of the stories but Growing like I'm just ⁓ I want to be the superhero either way I'm more on the vigilante side now than the superheroes. I'm like if there's the vigilante And then I am just a sidekick. Like I want to be the sidekick. I'm going to be the one that doesn't have so much pressure on them. But I'm always going to be loyal to my chosen vigilante and I'm going to help them out and I'm going to cover the tracks. And that's like my kind of position. I'm like the ranger covering the tracks, you from my D &D party. don't know. Yeah. Amelie: Yeah. Yeah. You get all the fancy cars and stuff anyway without the pressure. You know, I think I'm just, I was just thinking about Batman and Robin Hood for some reason. Lynn: Hmm. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You cannot drive it, I guess. You can't drive the fancy car, but you can sit in the seat. Yes, that's what I was thinking. I was thinking, you know, Batman was like the first vigilante that I kind of fancied. Yeah. Amelie: Yeah, yeah, I do agree. I just, I'm more into... Yeah, I don't know, I always felt things for villains. But... Lynn: That came later for me, but yes. Amelie: Not that. Not that. I don't know how to explain, I just, I always felt like, well, if all the villains, like they became villains for a reason and that's because the good people were not nice to them in the first place. So I'm thinking like, well, there's a reason. just, you don't just like, you're not just born ⁓ Villain is made. So I'm always like, ⁓ ⁓ few times when I was rewatching like Star Wars, I'm not a big. Lynn: Mmm. you Amelie: Big Star Wars fan or anything but when they came on was watching them and stuff and I always think to like now think about these scenes from villains Lynn: Mm, mm. Hmm. Amelie: And specifically with Star Wars because the sides are just so like... I'm just like... they really villains? Like, is it that bad? Like... I don't know, I just feel... a sort of freedom in being a villain. ⁓ Lynn: Yeah, yeah, that is true. Like I think everybody probably aspires to being a villain, but then it's just too nice to be one. Like I, I wish I could be like a villain. just, know. Amelie: Yeah, do you know like one of the things I always been saying like if you were talking about the lottery, like if you win the lottery, I in my mind, I'm always like, the only reason why I can't fully be myself is because I need like, ⁓ ⁓ ⁓ I about to say addicted, but it was not addiction. I have to have ⁓ money like live. Lynn: Mm-hmm. Amelie: therefore I need to have a job and therefore I need to be a way society wants me to be but if I didn't have... Lynn: you That's how they catch you. Yeah, that's how they get you in the system. That's the fucking thing, you know Yeah ⁓ Amelie: it. It's like if you don't have those strings attached of money then you can just be the way you want to be. the is that the people that do have too much money, ⁓ you ⁓ they a little bit mental and whatever but then it really depends on what kind of person you are. But that's something that like ⁓ I that I love to like just be myself. Lynn: Mmm. Whatever you want Mm. Amelie: You don't need anyone because you have your money. Lynn: Yeah, you know, I think you know, you could start a discussion on that like what if You could just be whoever you wanted to be And would then things like villains exist at all? You know outside of you know outside of there being like money or anything like if you don't if you can just be who you are nobody Nobody bothers you nobody bullies you you can just freely express yourself unless you're a psychopath, you know And you're like three years old and you're stabbing kittens then I guess that's you just not gonna grow up to be an okay person I guess. I'm pretty sure. But you know as a normal person or whatever. Right, right. Yeah. Yeah I mean I don't know. You know that's I guess an experiment one. Society would have to... Amelie: Jeffrey looking at you? Jeffrey Dahmer, not a Jeffrey that I know. Lynn: test let's just people be who they want to be and see what happens would it be like a better kind of society or or not I think probably but I mean I've not I don't know I haven't tried it Amelie: I just don't think that everybody is like us. I mean, we can see this now with what we have now. Lynn: Yeah. We are so wise. Amelie: You can tell as soon as there's a lot of money involved, it's not like... It's just this power hunger somehow. I don't know, it gets very skewed. Now we come from not having much money, so we know how it is to live a normal life and appreciate things that we have and buy and whatnot. Lynn: Mm. Mm. Amelie: I mean, these wealthy people, they are born with money, so they had that since day one. So like they have clue how it just gets so skewed. I assume it will make you very selfish in a way. ⁓ And ⁓ don't like I don't know how, ⁓ you know, the way world is run in general, ⁓ it just to be like Lynn: He definitely could, yeah. Amelie: Very wrong, it's cute. But think like, in a healthy, like in a healthy, good with like people that, you know, were not too selfish or actually wanted to gain power ⁓ over else, then I think that would be great. It would be great if everyone could just like, you know. Lynn: Yeah, no, yeah. Amelie: be themselves, do whatever they want and no one gets hurt and everyone would be happy. It's a fantasy. just does not exist right now, right here. But maybe that's the whole reason why we're here, to experience all these ⁓ Lynn: fantasy. Yeah, I was just gonna say like in this reality or whatever we're experiencing it's not like that but you know maybe that's also just you know maybe it's all just a game you know yeah a simulation or what who knows who the fuck knows Amelie: Yeah, it's game of polarities as well, isn't it? It's like, you don't have the push and pull, things will be pretty like, dead, a sense. I don't know. Lynn: Hmm. Yeah, that's the force and the tarot if you're gonna go there, right? It's like where you have too much stability and it gets boring. So you have to have some... But then maybe you have like a tiger who's gonna like eat your sheep and then you're off balance again because then you don't have, you know, stuff. You know, like whatever. Stuff is happening. I'm pretty sure there's always gonna be something that happens in life to keep it interesting no matter what kind of society you live in, no matter... Amelie: Yeah. Yeah. There's always something that happens. Lynn: whether you know things like poverty or or whether you know power struggles or not. I think even in in a small rural town somewhere in in the Andes or something there's stuff that's gonna happen to you in life. I maybe but and again there's all these stories or like also like I don't know like when I'm looking into the more rural areas where I grew up it just felt like everything was just so sleeping and people weren't really They were always just going in the same thing like every day and not really like waking up, not really thinking outside of their boxes. So I don't know, maybe guess a personality thing. I guess if you have more like our kind of personalities ⁓ then if you come from a rural town somewhere in the Andes where people really just are sheep herders and whatnot, you'd probably be like, I'm going to go traveling. And then you do go on the fool's journey or something. I guess that's ⁓ like ⁓ ⁓ like us would probably do in a situation like that. ⁓ Amelie: Yeah, I don't know, think like are people that are very happy with being, you know, ⁓ and just thinking about like, again, like ⁓ like where in the where I went to school, a lot of people... Lynn: Probably. Mm. Mm. Amelie: there were like, a lot of my friends, were like, ⁓ my god, this town is so boring. As soon as I finish school, I'm going to move to a bigger town. I'm going to move there and there and there. thinking about it, I mean, I don't really, I'm not really in touch with all these people anymore, but I know a few of them and most of them have stayed. They might travel and stuff, but they stayed. I few, ⁓ I a few of them, like ⁓ one my like old besties, she moved to Australia and ⁓ Lynn: Hmm. Yeah. Amelie: one moved to like a ⁓ like a city close, ⁓ like nearby, but it's really not like, ⁓ have not been ⁓ you know. And I just think that people are just really Some people are just very comfortable where they are and they ⁓ just in comfort. I'm like the opposite. I don't know, like, I always feel like I ⁓ need Lynn: Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm. You strive, you thrive in discomfort. Amelie: Yeah, I don't know, like maybe it's like trauma thing because that's a thing. ⁓ really like ⁓ things are a little bit... that's probably why I really enjoy being in London as well because there's always something happening and I think like ⁓ some us, we just like love solving problems. like... the something gets triggered, just like solving problems. And it's really funny because like when things are just very still, like very laid back, when people kind of like want to be in that place just to be like laid back and still, get so much anxiety. ⁓ really feel anxious and like ⁓ kind of a little bit in that kind of ⁓ Lynn: Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Amelie: when I'm here, because everything is just so the same and so quiet. I do appreciate it though, but at the same time, you know, like I think we are, there's something that drives humans to have this like, solve these problems. Because even like people that live in the, you know, have everything, there's always some kind of problem we have that you have to solve, even if there's no problems. I don't know, but I do think like some of us, we are just like, thrive when things get a bit chaotic and stuff. I can get really scared when things are like nice. I get scared that, my God, what if this happens? What if this happens? But when I am in a situation of like, like things are going to fall apart, I'm like super sharp with what to do and how to deal with things and you just do it. Lynn: All right. ⁓ Hmm. Mm. Mm. Amelie: You don't think about it, you just do it, you're not scared, you're not... It's just, you just do it and you solve it. It's just so weird. Lynn: Don't you think that's kind of survival mode? Amelie: Yeah, maybe. Lynn: I mean, yeah, I mean some people, I mean, I guess I think there's some people who, and just disclaimer, like whatever we're saying here, like I know nothing, I'm just saying things. disclaimer. I only know that I know nothing, which is saying things. But like, so I feel like for personalities, I think there's always people who are better in... Amelie: It's our opinion, I guess. Lynn: in chaotic situations or stress situations and others are, some people just fold very quickly when things get a bit out of order and out of plan ⁓ they really need the plans to function and need everything to go ⁓ to it and just completely keel over if it doesn't and get panic attacks and don't know what to do while others just ⁓ immediately something doesn't go right ⁓ they into this okay and then sharp mode of focusing I think like what you just mentioned. I know I am also prone to be very calm in chaos, but find it funny because you just talked so much about like people like you very much on problem solving. ⁓ And don't think I'm the type who goes into I need to solve the problem. ⁓ I don't that's my kind of mindset. I feel that's like maybe my stepdad and like, yeah, there's like a masculine part of the brain, maybe that's like I need a problem solve. I'm not really like I don't need problems ⁓ to be to be happy. But also like this thing like if you're going into astrology, like I'm a Taurus as my sun sign, but I'm very in I'm a Virgo as my and I'm a Sagittarius moon. So the Sagittarius moon maybe wants to keep moving, but let's maybe not go into astrology right now. You're gonna sit here for like two hours more. anyway, like the typical, you know, what people say about Taurus is that they're very chill and you know, like very earthy, very also like stubborn and just very like thrive and when nothing happens. And in a way that is true. Like it's not that I thrive when nothing happens, but I like my the solitude and I like the stillness. in it. Like I don't have to have things happening because there's always things happening in my brain or I'm always like in creative processes and stuff so there's stuff happening. I don't need to go things happen to like this is a good place for me. But maybe the Sagittarius moon that is like you know very much up there and just like traveling in the brain all the time and stuff. But yeah so I just found it interesting because you like you were so focused on like problem solving. I'm sitting here and it's like I don't think I Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: I focus on that so much. No, no. Amelie: I always, I feel like I've always been like that with like friends and people. if they, people like to tell their issues to me. It's always been like that since I was really young and I just always feel like I can help. I always either talk through it or give them help. Lynn: Mm. Hmm. Hmm. Mm. Amelie: I'm not like, I will not, not forcing people to do anything, but I just feel like it's almost like... don't know how to explain it. It's not like I'm forcefully like want to change them, ⁓ but just feel like ⁓ I feel sorry for... ⁓ Yeah, someone is upset or sad or something is wrong, then you know, I want to make them feel better. So like I'll solve the problem. And I do find like I do this in many different areas. I don't know. ⁓ Lynn: You offer options. You offer options. Mmm. Mm. Amelie: living in London, for example when you have like housemates and stuff which was annoying ⁓ I had some nice ones too. ⁓ you know you don't really have like your own furniture and stuff and you know you're going to be moving and just like randomly put things up so it looks good and like using things that like that you would normally not use for certain things. ⁓ almost like a part of a play somehow. Lynn: Hmm. Amelie: it just to get like creative but like solving problems. But I don't know. So I mean, I'm you go if we're doing the astrology thing, I'm I'm an Aquarius Sun. So that could have ⁓ something do with that. Like we just a little bit mental. ⁓ And I'm also Taurus in the moon. Lynn: Yeah, in the best ways. Amelie: in the moon so my ⁓ is Taurus ⁓ my ascendant is Leo. so I mean, I'm not, I'm not super like super deep in, into astrology. I wish I could, but I can never like remember things. But I assume like, I assume, ⁓ always feel like people, people see me as more outgoing and very social, but actually I'm, I'm ⁓ much so like an introvert and a loner. I'm very happy just like, ⁓ Lynn: you Yeah. Amelie: being by myself. But I can be both. I'm like a chameleon sometimes. I can, yeah. Lynn: Yeah, I feel that. very much. Yeah. But now, the way that now I have to almost redact my statement because the way that you're describing problem solving was not the way that I thought in my head because that's very much familiar with that too. Just like I like I'm not I felt like, know, like some people they trying to find problems so that they can solve so that they can be happy about stuff. But this this thing that you described, it's also kind of very much what what I'm experience what I've been experiencing ⁓ my whole life as well. Because I think it's kind of like just giving or for my part, like just giving a different perspective. Like people also have like come to me with like, ⁓ this and this and this, you know, this is complicated or like with interpersonal relationships or whatnot. And they don't know. And then I'm just saying like a thing or two and being like this and this. And then they're like, shit, I never thought about that. And then they go and then something happens or something changes. And I'm like, I just OK. You know, ⁓ Amelie: Hahaha Lynn: So, yeah, in that way, like without really meaning like, ⁓ for it's just like I'm offering perspective when people ask you for perspective. And then very often it just so coincides, I guess, that whatever perspective I have is something that to me is a very obvious perspective. But then to the people who come to me, they're like blown out of their mind. like, I've never thought about this. And that's but it's even like in smaller things like Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: I don't remember any concrete details, but it's also happened that it worked. When like, ⁓ yeah, we're having some of this problem. And I'm like, yeah, well, how about we just do like so and so instead? And like, never thought about that. And for me, that seemed like an obvious choice if, know, and then it's like, yeah, OK. Well, there you go. Amelie: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, but that's a, like that of problem solving as in like when there is something and people are like, kind of stressing about it. Like you just get like a sharp mind and you like just solve it somehow. You might like not be perfect or like, you just solve the problem so you can just like ⁓ get on with ⁓ And... Lynn: Yeah. Hmm. Yeah. Yeah, kind of like getting the tracks, the tracks on the train of life, right for people. This sounds very grungy, but it's not really like that. feel like I mean, I don't know how you experience it for me. I feel it's like kind of more like kind of working in the shadows because I I notice. OK, I have noticed like these things happen, like blah, blah. I come with a solution. Then they're like, ⁓ shit. Yeah. And then suddenly their life turns around or they do something really big. Amelie: Yeah, yeah, I- Lynn: But never falls back on me. It's of as if I implant the idea in them and then they are like, ⁓ yeah, this was my idea. And I'm like, I remember differently, but you ⁓ go, you It's fine. ⁓ You go. your thing. ⁓ I don't how it's, yeah, I don't know. But for me, it's often like that. Amelie: Yeah, yeah, no, I am, I totally understand what you're talking about. yeah, I've been like ⁓ it's, ⁓ been like, not but I've been thinking about that as well. ⁓ I sometimes I like, not intentionally, but I do think that sometimes I am a little bit of like the devil's advocate, sometimes just to like, make people think. Lynn: Mm. Mm. Mm-hmm. Amelie: just so something clicks in their mind. yeah, many times it's just like you say, you kind of like say something that triggers a train of thought in other people. And you know that you are the one that kind of like helped them or triggered that, but they don't really, not like they haven't, they just. Lynn: Yeah. Mm. Yeah, right. Amelie: didn't see it or they didn't that it was that probably. But something like, yeah, sometimes ⁓ I was younger, I used to get really upset. ⁓ can't people see the fact that I have been useful? Cause it's like, you want to, you want to be ⁓ for other people. You want to feel like you're helping them and it's like you ⁓ want to tell you that, you helped me just because you want to fuel your ego is because you want to know that you've done something right so you can go on and do it. So it's like a confirmation of like, I'm doing something that actually helps people, something right. But you never get that because I don't know, I don't know why. I guess people don't see. Yeah. And I've been like, I've been Lynn: Yeah, right. Mm. Mm. Yeah, Yeah, it feels weird, yeah. Amelie: telling this to myself for many many years because there's so many people that I have helped that I don't really talk to and many them actually I had to say things to them that they didn't want to hear so they got annoyed with me ⁓ but ⁓ yeah Lynn: Hmm. Oh, same. Yeah, I've lost friendships like this, but now they're living a better life, you know, after the trigger. So it's like, I guess this was my role in this friendship. Never mind then. Okay, it was good. Put away the ego, you know, you just have to be old enough to be able to to not give it so much weight. It's just like we're all fleeting roles, guess. Amelie: Exactly. Exactly, I just think like... Yeah. Yeah, it's really difficult because it just, my ego gets really pissed off. Lynn: It's the Leo. Amelie: But yeah, I just like, sometimes wish I could get a little bit more credit for things, but... At the end of the day I'm like, actually I know, I know that it worked out. But it's really difficult when you have to say things that you know that they don't want to hear. then they stop talking to you and then you know you find out or you talk to them or you've seen that actually what I just did got them there. Lynn: Hmm. Amelie: Like specifically when you introduce them to people, it happened to me so many times, I introduced friends to other friends and then they kind of like... Lynn: Mm-hmm. Amelie: like me, ⁓ become best friends and was like, not even like thanks for, you know, introducing us. It was just like, let's drop Amelie because she's boring now. But then it always comes to a point of like... Lynn: Yeah, they become best friends, yeah. Mm. Amelie: they want me back in their life as a friend or something and at that point I'm just like, well, I'm not, not going to be the same. I take things like that. ⁓ is something that I've, ⁓ to me, loyalty is something like if you break I'm not like, ⁓ I will talk to you again. I don't get pissed off like that. ⁓ But in back of my mind is always like, I know what you did and I'm, yeah. Lynn: Hmm. Breach of trust. Yeah. Amelie: It's like something is broken, we can probably be friends but we will never be that close because I'm onto you. It sounds really horrible but you have to like... Lynn: Mm. Yeah. Yeah. No, I get it. get it. Yeah, loyalty is a big thing for me. that's just, yeah, experiencing most people not to be loyal, even if they say that they they stick with you as a friend or whatever else, you know, I'm just I'm just really once I, you know, once I find the value in a person and I like to stick with people, you know, but, know, I mean, whatever life happens, but I just Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: You what I was just thinking about with all that? ⁓ I feel like this archetype of, like there were two things I was thinking about. The first is like with this thing that people not getting credit are actually, because it can, like now we're talking about more like, necessarily life changing things, but more like not things that happen like, for example, in a work situation at a very concrete, right? Where somebody, you have a plan or you have an idea and then somebody else gets the credit for the idea, although it was yours. ⁓ in situations like that, because that's the kind of the same mechanic. And what I've read is or what I've heard this, mean, there's several techniques that you can do. But say you're in a big meeting, right? And then you bring out you come with a really good idea and then people are like, somebody's like, oh, wow, and I haven't thought of a blah, blah. And then we're going to adopt this idea. And then somebody else suddenly, it seems like everybody and everybody's in on it that this other person was the person who had the idea. And, you know, but it was me saying it so that you basically just have to reintroduce like while you're like in the meeting or in on chat or whatnot and you're like as I have pointed out earlier this idea is really good or that you say like so nice of you to take up my idea craig you know like stuff like that so that people kind of see that that it's yours but then obviously this is very like ego and you're you know clinging to it but you know ⁓ people struggle with that ⁓ this is these are like their methods that you can ⁓ and practice to actually get your credit Amelie: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, do use, as we discussed earlier, I do like, that's something that I use at work quite a lot. But yeah, I do, yeah, I totally agree. There's quite a few times that happen at work. And I don't know, I think... Lynn: ⁓ yeah. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. You just kind of used it on me. It good. It's good. Just you were polite about it as we discussed. I'm like, oh yeah, I don't even remember. But yeah, see, you're right. You know, so that's good. Yeah. Amelie: Yeah! Yeah! Yeah, yeah, you have to use it, but then you just have to also know that people might not still like take it. But you have to, like you have to. There's like, there are a few changes like at work that happened, like there's like a very significant thing that happened at work when like a few managers were away on holiday. Lynn: Mm. like it yeah yeah ⁓ Mm-hmm. Amelie: and they were working on this and they basically said to me to keep an eye, like I was in the loop of what's happening just in case they needed some help. And literally on the second day, I was like, hold on, why do they have such problems with this? Why don't they just do this and this? So I literally just send an email like. Lynn: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm. Amelie: Would it be possible if you can use this to do this because I don't see why not and literally a few hours later It's like actually that's a great idea and now it's something that we're like using like on everything ⁓ it's like ⁓ nobody Acknowledged the fact that it was me because as soon as managers were back they're like, ⁓ yep This is what we're doing people implementing this and that but who came up with the idea? but Lynn: Mm-hmm. Right. Well, yeah. Mm. ⁓ Right, yeah. Amelie: You can't really like... But I think, I think to be honest, I think these type of things are... When you work for a company, they are the ones that should keep track of these things acknowledge it. ⁓ think that this is like what companies should do because... ⁓ Lynn: Yeah, that's where the potential race comes in. You know, if you're useful, you know, then it's you who's useful and not Craig. You know, it's you who had the idea and Craig gets the raise or something. like, no, no, no, no, no. ⁓ Amelie: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's the thing. you know, it's also like just, I don't know, it's just, like feeling, it's the same thing like we talked about before, is the feeling that you're like ⁓ feeling like it's just like an acknowledgement of like ⁓ did something good. So maybe then you actually want to continue to work even better. But ⁓ you don't get acknowledged, then Lynn: Mm. Mm. Mm. Yeah. Amelie: you kind of like do a mediocre job or you do I ⁓ think I don't know for me I like when I'm doing something I like to do things properly and I had this I had these discussions before ages ago at work it was like Amelie why ⁓ do you have to do things like so because you could just do things like mediocre, you still get paid the same, you get more time, you get less stress, but I just like, there's something in me, I just can't do it. I've been trying to, like sometimes I'm just like, I'm gonna... Lynn: Hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's a thing. That's also how the system exploits you. That's also the system exposed because a lot of people do it like that. You know, it's just I'm going to do my best, but you're not being paid to best. You're just being paid shit like my best friend. Her main job, she's working as a translator and also something I've done a little bit, but just like her her main thing. She's really good at it. She's very good. And and I mean, now there's so many like machine translations and stuff. And then there's so many so often, know, they get they have to redo like a machine translation. often they're so bad and not good enough that you basically have to re translate the entire thing, but you only paid ⁓ ⁓ machine translation edit basically, which is like a minuscule amount, but you're still doing a big, much bigger job, you're not getting paid for it. And it's like, why the you know, should I be doing this? You know, like, and also for, you know, working with languages and then working with like being a bit of a ⁓ perfectionist, you want to give them a bad job of a translation because then they're also going to be like this sounds machine translated. It's like, you know, you should be like, well, you're just paying me for that. So that's what I'm giving you. But you can't because then you never get a job again. You know, so this is really like, yeah. But hello society. know, that's where we're at. ⁓ Amelie: Yeah, yeah. That's true. That's so true. I used to translate as well. But it's like you say, just, they used to pay for translators to translate things. And they used to be like, Amelie, can you just like read this through? like, ⁓ Swedish? Because they could obviously not read Swedish. And I read it through. I'm just like, who translated this? They're like, ⁓ this is a company that we hire. I'm like, you paid, you paid them to translate this. ⁓ Lynn: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm. Yeah. Mm-hmm. ⁓ Amelie: They're like, yes. So I was basically sitting and changing things, but they got paid. was like, it to me. I can translate it for you. But obviously, there was no extra pay for that. So I just don't want to be not doing it anymore. Lynn: All right. Yeah, off am I. ⁓ ⁓ my gosh. You know, another thing I thought of with the also you mentioned like devil's advocate and kind of ⁓ taking role and being somebody who may not necessarily instigates, but who gets things moving just to get go a little bit into the mythical because I was thinking that's kind of the archetype of or ⁓ that is archetype in a way. then in I talk. I talked about this with my people from the Norse shaman school here, Yggdrasil. And in the Norse myth, the person who gets things moving, because otherwise things would be at a standstill that is Loki. ⁓ yeah, of course, you know, but ⁓ mean, in you know, ⁓ many there is it's ⁓ often the trickster gods, you know, it's the trickster gods that just ⁓ Amelie: And you'd say that. Lynn: are the ones who kind of instigate or do stuff and then they're often seen as... Is my cat doing stuff he's not supposed to do? Apologies, stuff happening in the background. they're trickster gods who are seen as kind of the bad guys because they're triggering things that ⁓ might calamity or whatnot but they're actually things that like they actually get things moving. and they're not liked for it. this archetype, you know, that's kind of the, guess that's us with ⁓ Loki's ⁓ yeah. And another thing, like, when you also the things that when you said that, that you say things that people don't necessarily like to hear. I was just thinking that back in the days, know, ⁓ back the days there was people could go to these people because everybody knew who this person was in the village or in the whatever. and they would go to them to get the truth. now we like, know, in our big societies, we don't have these roles necessarily. But I mean, ⁓ the courts, you know, we had the jester and the jester was the only one who was allowed to tell the king the truth. Traditionally, And he would, you know, wrap it up in jokes and whatnot. But he could basically tell the king that he was doing a shit job. And he would normally with a normal king not lose his head for it while anybody else be like, ⁓ know, off the head or something. Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: you know, the Jester thing or in other societies, like often, very often the shaman who did that job, you know, who was telling people the truth, not always like, you know, with a bonk on the head, sometimes like wrapped up in a story, but sometimes it a bonk on the head. And that's that's our our job in a sense, or that used to be, you know, that was people knew about that. OK, they will not lie to me. They will just tell it how they see it. Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: with their wisdom or whatnot, right? Or because they're talking to the spirits or whatever reason. But have this role that they will tell you the truth or they will tell you the harsh, the harshness of the reality. And you went to them, you were prepared that that is probably what you were going to hear and not like, you know, he's just not. Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: marrying you because he's having a difficult time. Like no he has two other women and he's not liking you or you know whatever problems people would go to a person who is just it's love, sex, money, power usually like the typical ones right so ⁓ yeah Amelie: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I myself like how do they become this person because you ⁓ have to like start very young but when you're young ⁓ can't really have that kind of shaman kind of know so it's almost like you have to build this can you? I don't know I don't know like how I always think this like how does this like wise Lynn: Mm. Mm. I can too. ⁓ Amelie: old man or woman become this wise old man or woman, they must be that when they're really really young. I'm just like ⁓ about that and I'm just like could I do that? Not ⁓ the sense but it's like ⁓ it be so interesting to like to have that that I don't know. ⁓ What you think? How do they become? ⁓ Lynn: Yeah. Hmm. think it's yeah, yeah ⁓ I mean, again, there's so many different traditions, And I only know of a few of them. And some of it is also just my thoughts, what I'm just going to come with. many traditions is that the old shaman will pick out a young person and train them. But then it's also because the way that they pick them out is, I guess, not just like... nice nose, someone's gonna pick you, you know, but they're also feeling like, okay, this is a bit of a weirdo, you know, they're connected or like, way that you see things different when you've come a certain way, right? So like, if you know, if you now see like a child that's six years old, that's talking to a tree, or to the water, then you're probably gonna be like, not like, he's a bit kooky, but you're gonna be like, you know, hmm. maybe he sees things, maybe he feels things, right? And they're like, okay, this is a good, this is a good candidate to become the next Charmin. And then they would be trained in the seidr or in the things. And then they also would get all the stories from the old person. And then they would become an old person very soon. And I think that as many of us, maybe also even you, like many of us who are not that necessarily that old, but have been told when we are young, that we, we are, we seem old or we should Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: you know, be more like other kids or whatnot. So I think it's that it's that kind of personality or that kind of trait that very often would trigger that or be like, OK, this is a good candidate. Yeah. So this is often like that in other traditions. It was kind of not by chance. But for example, in the traditional way in Japan for the shamans to become shamans, traditionally, used to be only women and blind women. So if a child, if a female child was blind, then they would become or most likely, I guess they would train, then the best ones would become, you but they would be then trained to be a shaman. there you have like a society where you have to like ancient Japan, right? Where you have to have some sort of value to society. Otherwise, if you don't have a value, you cannot live, right? And as a blind person, ⁓ a long period in Japan, it's almost still a little bit like that, if you have disabilities, you're not, you know, it's not that great for you. I still isn't very, ⁓ very good. it used to be like really bad, right? ⁓ I in many societies, because it's just how it was, you had like limited resources. So it was natural, you know, it was kind of like a natural selection. It's how it was. Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: then you're blind, you're kind of useless unless the blindness ⁓ something else. And they were very strongly believing that if you are blind, especially born blind, you have the other side. So it also reported they would see things, although they didn't see things. So they were trained as shamans often. And then I guess just sent out to where shamans were needed lived there as the towns of village Shaman Amelie: Yeah, I think that's really cool. makes a lot of sense. The problem now is that we do not have these shamans that can pick us out and train us. And I think ⁓ said this before when ⁓ said to you that it's really nice that you have a group of friends that are kind of into the same thing so you can learn from one another or there's some kind of support. Lynn: Yeah, not really. ⁓ Mm. Mm. Amelie: It's very difficult, like, because back in the day, I guess we lived in our villages, you had your little tribe and you had, it was, you could, you were seen because now you're not really seen by anyone. it's, you kind of like left to your own devices. There was another thing I was thinking about as well when it comes to maybe saying like, Lynn: Yeah. Amelie: harsh things or just being more like straightforward. I personally find that it has something to like it has something to do with like loyalty when you're a friend. I just I really don't like you know when you have friends and they can see that something's not right but they're too scared to say it so they just don't say it until something breaks or until maybe Lynn: Mm. Mm. Amelie: you know, comes up or example you're ⁓ dating guy and your friend can see that this guy is not really treating you very well, but the friend doesn't say anything because you know, she doesn't want to hurt your feelings because you know, she can see that you really like this guy. But then obviously then things might happen, you break up and then not until after. Lynn: Mm. Amelie: the breakup, she goes like, yeah, I could tell that he wasn't very nice to you. And this is something that I just find like, this is not loyalty for me. Loyalty is like to say something when you see something happening, even though you know the person might get upset or, you know, angry or maybe not even talk to you for a few days. But ⁓ a really good friend is honest. So if they see something that is not right, you should Lynn: Yeah. Mm. Mm. Amelie: tell them. yeah, like, that's how I feel like I, that's how I want my friends to be towards me. ⁓ I'm like that towards them. But I think it's not really reciprocated many times because, know. Lynn: Mm. Yeah, Same. No, no, I'm the same. I'm the same. want I want the harsh truth rather than the sugar coating for from most things. I we know sometimes white lies are a good thing, but ⁓ psychologically, but still. But ⁓ I ⁓ you have to have a certain Amelie: Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Lynn: You have to have a certain bond with that friend for that to Like I think, like my best friend, I think I could probably tell her like something really harsh and then she would probably be very upset for a while, but she would probably forgive me more than she will forgive me for ⁓ year forgetting her birthday. I'm still not living that down I think. Amelie: ⁓ dear. ⁓ Lynn: I'm putting it on the air now. I'm very sorry that happened. But I love her to bits. But yeah, so I think that that would be forgiven probably because she knows me and she knows in heart of her heart that I don't mean her anything. I don't mean her bad things. And she knows also how my brain works and that I can be very direct and I can say things that for her psychology is very different from mine. Amelie: Hahaha Lynn: So she can get very upset about things that are too direct, but then she kind of understands me. So she kind of gives me some, cuts me some slack, you But yeah, the other hand, I learned to be a bit more sugarcoated with her sometimes because, you ⁓ But other, I have had situations where I have lost friendships over being too direct ⁓ or just direct enough, I guess. But exactly you, same situation you just described. as like fictional if it was, but I had a friend and just she was a new friend-ish, you know, but ⁓ really liked her. We hung out a lot, we shared a lot and I felt like there was a really good connection. She was also kind of more like ⁓ like supernaturally interested, blah, blah, bit witchy vibes. But she ⁓ started a guy and I had, saw so many red flags with that person. ⁓ And she was also telling me how other people saw like how he wasn't an okay person or other people were also like super alarmed. then she also had a phase where she was alarmed. She had a phase where she realized things about him weren't good, but she got back together with him and he a narcissist, I would say from me not being a psychologist, but you know, just all the signs were there. Like he was cutting her from everybody. He was like completely taking, taking in her like over life. And ⁓ it went to the where I actually read the cards for her link so there wasn't even like me directly saying it but the cards were pretty like direct about I mean I used the word narcissist in my reading it but but but you know the cards were really like being quite direct what would happen if she keeps going back to him or you know and what's happening and she was like okay and then just a few weeks later you know and she broke up and then a few weeks later she was back with him and then I saw them together and then Amelie: Hahaha Lynn: One day after she realized that I had seen them together being like all lovey-dovey, you know, she sent some really ugly messages and broke of contact entirely. And I was just like, I guess she needs that now or she's just, I mean, I understood what was coming was from that place of him, like isolating her or whatnot, or not wanting people in her life that would tell her of the red flags. Right. So. Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: So that happened, it was really unfortunate, I lied to her very much. yeah, so she was out of my life, or I mean she's still out of my life, but I think that's two years ago or something now. And the interesting thing is that earlier this year, or I think it was around the, I think it was in January, I'm not sure. I got a message from a new number that I don't know, but she said like immediately her name, and then she said like, oh, ba ba ba ba. I've sent some really ugly messages to a lot of people and cut out a lot of people and I didn't mean to hurt, na na na. I went through some stuff and so she explained herself. And I mean, I knew this, ⁓ you I've been knowing this, ⁓ this what's happening, but it was nice ⁓ to to getting the kind of acknowledgement ⁓ or of repair or just saying that, okay, I was going through some shit and I didn't mean it. So we're not, we're still not friends. Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: and we're not friends, it didn't get back together, I just wished her well. If she wants to be my friend she ⁓ contact me, but I'm not gonna like dig around there ⁓ for the time being. ⁓ Amelie: Yeah, this is exactly what we were talking about as well of like saying something to someone that might hurt them but in the long run, you know, there's definitely she was just not ready for what you had to say and yeah. Lynn: Mm. Yeah, yeah, not just me though, but because in this case, it wasn't just me. was like I think everybody who was close to her was like warning her about this, you know. Amelie: It's very difficult when you're dealing with narcissists. That's a completely different episode as well. Yeah, ⁓ There's a lot. I've done... ⁓ I yeah. I ⁓ have feeling that you both, you and I have a lot of experience with ⁓ that. Lynn: Let's talk about narcissists at the next chaotic corner. ⁓ If you have, because I have personal experience, so yeah, we can go, we can get into that. Amelie: archetype or whatever you call them there's no archetype there's just like a personality yeah yeah but ⁓ i just ⁓ just because of that i've been around and learning a lot of things about that personality because i kind of had to ⁓ yeah it is very interesting and it is very damaging for someone Lynn: Mm. Personality. It's a personality disorder. Yeah, a bit personality disorder. ⁓ Mmm. Mmm. Amelie: that has gone through something like this. Now, I don't know if that was like the first time she experienced that. you know, if you never really, yeah, if you never really anyone like that, then ⁓ are that she was just infatuated with whatever he was saying to her. yeah. And this case, it's almost like you can tell them ⁓ only you can tell them. Lynn: Yeah, I don't know. It's intense. Yeah. yeah. ⁓ Amelie: and then they have to learn by actually through it. Otherwise they will never ⁓ that such personality can, like a person can be so cruel in a way. So it's unbelievable how like they work, but yeah, it's a shame. It's a shame that people, you know, ⁓ can't listen to others and then, but ⁓ sometimes just have to get through it. Lynn: Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, isn't it like that though almost always? I mean, growing up, know, and your parents say something like, you shouldn't do this because, and how often do you not listen as a child or a teenager, you know, because you have to go through it yourself. And then the grownups, you know, they want to, most, you know, some of them, they want to keep you from going through the hurt. But very often that's the only way to actually learn is to go through it yourself and... Amelie: You just have to get through it. Yeah. Mmm. Lynn: to get traumatized potentially. we want to keep our, you know, the younger generation from trauma, but it's just not, I guess it's not realistic. ⁓ not, mean, it's not realistic, but it might also not be healthy. ⁓ don't know. If don't learn anything, if you completely, I mean, this is another topic, right? I don't know, but if you completely shield a person from everything, what, how they turn out? You know, you know, ⁓ it's an you know. Amelie: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's also maybe if you just constantly shield someone from anything that's harm, it's also kind of making them evolve a person. ⁓ You're them stagnant so they will have any kind of experiences of anything. So that is also a bad thing. ⁓ Lynn: Yeah. And that's really where the wisdom comes in from, like, guess, or if you say like a very good traditional shaman, because they would know ⁓ to send somebody through a difficult situation and when to ⁓ like, don't do this. You because you have to, I mean, you have to be really good at ⁓ understanding person's psychology, obviously, for these things. Amelie: degree. Yeah. Yeah. Lynn: You cannot send everybody through a storm of daggers because some people will and some other people they will get scars and they will come out a self. But you have to ⁓ know you do with that. ⁓ Amelie: Yeah. When you have good friends that go through things like this, when they have to go through it, I guess the only thing that you can do is to, like, even though you don't like it, you just have to be there once they fall. Once, you know, things get worse, you just have to, like, be there. This shoulder that can cry on, if they let you, this is the thing. just have to, like, it's hard, but ⁓ guess, like... Lynn: If they let you, yes. Amelie: Yeah, that's why it's, it would be, it's nice to have like a shaman because in a way they let you go through it but it's also controlled because they see it, they keep an eye on it. So don't interfere with it but it's almost like they can see what's happening so once ⁓ cracks they kind of know where to pick up the pieces. Hopefully. Lynn: Yeah. Yes, but then again this requires that the person in question actually seeks out the shaman in question, right? Because if you're... Because if you're often like, if you're in a thing and you're whatever thing it is, right? And you it's kind of wrong, you know it's damaging or ⁓ you often you know it on the inside then often it's also like I don't need help with this, you know? That you're like really like you're stubborn, it's like I'm just ⁓ gonna this. Amelie: Yeah. Lynn: And it's usually not the time you go to the person that you know will tell you the truth. That is the time you're like, I'm just taking the longer road. I'm not passing by the hut of the shaman or the witch. I'm not doing it just in case, just in case they're outside in the garden and throwing a word at me. know, and then afterwards you can come to them and then they're like, what have learned? Yeah. ⁓ Amelie: Yeah. Yeah Yup. don't want to say I told you so, but I told you so. ⁓ Lynn: Yeah, amazing. Wow, we have been... Look at that. The time flies when we just chat about everything and and everything. No, really interesting. So we had topics that we maybe wanted to talk about and we talked about childhood ⁓ and and and power and problem solving and narcissists. Amelie: tricky. everything and nothing and everything. How did we end up on that? I'm not sure, but... Lynn: Yeah, it's the rabbit hole, so just keep coming and that's the fun part. Amelie: yeah, yeah. Lynn: It's a good way to spend a Wednesday evening in this case. Amelie: Yes. Lynn: Wow, nice. ⁓ Amelie: I have a feeling that we have uncovered some side holes to go into for future episodes as well. Lynn: Mm-hmm. Absolutely. yeah. And then people will just have to bear with our chaotic Or they'll just completely... I know you guys will love it. ⁓ it's so random. Yes, triggers the ADD brain. And New idea! back into Amelie: Yeah. The mic. might people into like ⁓ to jump in ⁓ ⁓ something as well but sorry you can't not at this point you cannot... ⁓ ⁓ Lynn: Mm. Well, you can always send us an email. Comment below or send us an email. We will this up for the first episode of Amelynn's Corner of ⁓ Beautiful. Have wonderful evening and thank you for your day. Thank you for listening. Amelie: Yeah. Beautiful. ⁓ or day. Bye! Lynn: Goodbye.