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Muscles, Marriage, and Murder: The Sally McNeil Story · 10 Minute Murder | Bingeable True Crime Stories

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Sally McNeil was a former marine, a bodybuilder, and a
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: woman who could literally bench press her problems. But the
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  Speaker 1: real weight she was carrying that came from behind closed doors, abuse, steroids, violence,
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: and a shotgun, all wrapped up in a marriage that
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: lasted barely long enough to order takeout, and then on
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  Speaker 1: Valentine's Day, it all came crashing down. This is the
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  Speaker 1: story of Killer Sally, and it's not what you think
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: before we jump in. If you like your true crime bingeable,
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: you're exactly where you need to be hit Follow now
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: for at least two new episodes every week. This is
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: ten minute murder. Let's go. The Allentown, Pennsylvania that young
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: Sally Dempsey grew up in wasn't exactly the stuff of
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: Norman Rockwell paintings in the nineteen sixties. Her childhood home
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  Speaker 1: was more like a live action stress test. Her father
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  Speaker 1: was an abusive alcoholic, and violence lingered so heavily in
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  Speaker 1: the air it might as well have had its own
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  Speaker 1: recliner in the living room. Sally and her mother took
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  Speaker 1: turns being the target, and when it wasn't her mother
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  Speaker 1: flinching from the next blow, it was Sally the idea
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  Speaker 1: that families don't live like this. That was completely foreign
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  Speaker 1: to her. She didn't know this wasn't normal, It just was.
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  Speaker 1: Those first few years wired her to expect pain and
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  Speaker 1: chaos as a daily part of life. Even after her
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  Speaker 1: mom finally left her dad and remarried, something that took
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  Speaker 1: real guts, those early lessons stuck. That kind of trauma
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: doesn't politely excuse itself just because you changed the address.
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  Speaker 1: Sally's only real escape was school, not the classrooms. Those
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: were just the warm up act. What mattered was physical activity, swimming, diving,
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  Speaker 1: track and field. That's where she felt strong in control.
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  Speaker 1: She wasn't being chased, she was winning, and for a
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  Speaker 1: while it looked like she might outrun all of it.
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  Speaker 1: She put herself through college, paid her own way, and
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  Speaker 1: set her sights on becoming a gym teacher. Totally doable.
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  Speaker 1: Then the money ran out. After nearly four years of
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  Speaker 1: grinding through school, she had to stop short of the
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  Speaker 1: finish line. Her dreams didn't end, they just needed a detour. Luckily,
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  Speaker 1: she had a plan B. Her brother and uncle were
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  Speaker 1: both in the army. Sally figured, hey, she's tough, disciplined,
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  Speaker 1: built like an Olympic champion. Why not give the military
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  Speaker 1: a shot? She wasn't wrong. It made sense. The army
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  Speaker 1: offered structure, purpose, and a steady paycheck. Plus she already
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  Speaker 1: knew how to survive chaos. Yes, she'd just be doing
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  Speaker 1: it now. In Camo, Sally dropped everything and joined the Army.
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  Speaker 1: For someone like her who craved structure and thrived under pressure,
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  Speaker 1: it felt like the right call. Physical training, she crushed it.
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  Speaker 1: Rank and routine she adapted fast. Before long, Sally was
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  Speaker 1: promoted to sergeant. But structure can only hold back so much.
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  Speaker 1: The lessons she picked up in her chaotic childhood didn't
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  Speaker 1: vanish when she put on a uniform. Her anger, always simmering,
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  Speaker 1: started to boil over. She had command now, and unfortunately
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  Speaker 1: that meant when her temper flared, it was often the
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  Speaker 1: people beneath her who felt it. Eventually it caught up
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: with her. Sally lost her stripes and got demoted. Instead
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  Speaker 1: of cooling things off, that just added more fuel to
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  Speaker 1: her already unstable emotional fire. By the end of her service,
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  Speaker 1: the military had made their decision. They weren't bringing her back.
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  Speaker 1: With no clear path forward, she leaned into what had
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  Speaker 1: come naturally in her life physical strength. While still in
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  Speaker 1: the army, she had discovered bodybuilding. On Valentine's Day nineteen
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  Speaker 1: eighty seven, she entered her first competition and placed fourth.
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  Speaker 1: It wasn't a win, but it was enough to light
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  Speaker 1: a fire within Sally. Bodybuilding gave her focus, control, and
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  Speaker 1: a place to channel everything she carried inside. After the military,
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  Speaker 1: she went all in training became her new mission. Somewhere
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  Speaker 1: in the mix. She married a man named Anthony Loudon.
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  Speaker 1: They had two kids together, but according to Sally, the
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  Speaker 1: relationship turned violent. She left him, took the kids and
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  Speaker 1: one full custody in court. Her personal life may have
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  Speaker 1: been a mess, but professionally she kept pushing forward in
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  Speaker 1: the bodybuilding world. That's how she met her second husband,
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  Speaker 1: Ray McNeil. The two didn't waste time. They were married
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  Speaker 1: just two months after meeting. At first glance, they looked
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  Speaker 1: like a power couple, both ripped, both competitive, both chasing
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  Speaker 1: the same dream. But looks can be deceiving. Ray was
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  Speaker 1: deep into the bodybuilding world, just like Sally, But bodybuilding
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  Speaker 1: isn't exactly a financial gold mine unless you're one of
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  Speaker 1: those rare few at the top. Money was tight, and
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  Speaker 1: when it came to who got to keep chasing the dream.
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  Speaker 1: It was Ray who stayed in the gym while Sally
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  Speaker 1: found another way to bring in cash. She started filming
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  Speaker 1: herself wrestling men three hundred dollars an hour. That's what
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  Speaker 1: the Sessions paid the videos, which helped her earn the
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  Speaker 1: nickname Killer. Sally definitely played up the sexual tension. Some
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  Speaker 1: were even sexually explicit, but according to Sally, there was
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  Speaker 1: a hard line. She didn't sleep with clients. She wrestled them,
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  Speaker 1: got paid, and went home to her husband. It wasn't
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  Speaker 1: her dream job, but it kept the lights on. More importantly,
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  Speaker 1: it allowed Ray to quit his own job and focus
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  Speaker 1: full time on bodybuilding. So to Sally, it felt like
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: it was worth it. At least that's how it started.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: The reality at home was a lot darker. According to Sally,
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  Speaker 1: Ray turned violent just three days after their wedding, and
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  Speaker 1: she wasn't the only target. He allegedly became physically abusive
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  Speaker 1: toward the children as well. When Sally was around, the
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  Speaker 1: kids had some protection, but she traveled often, mostly on
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  Speaker 1: trips to South America, to pick up steroids, not for
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  Speaker 1: herself but for Ray to use and to sell in
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  Speaker 1: the gym while she was gone, the situation got worse.
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  Speaker 1: Ray believed in corporal punishment. If one of the kids
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  Speaker 1: did something wrong, he'd take them into a room, belt
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  Speaker 1: in hand, and beat the one in trouble while forcing
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  Speaker 1: the other to watch. It wasn't discipline, it was cruelty
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  Speaker 1: dressed up as control, and it didn't stop with the kids.
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  Speaker 1: Sally said her own abuse started with slaps and shoves,
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  Speaker 1: but Ray was also using steroids, and with that came Ray.
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  Speaker 1: Things escalated. The slaps became punches, then came the choking.
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  Speaker 1: The steroids bulked Ray up, and they also flipped a switch.
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  Speaker 1: The shoves turned into punches, the punches turned into choking,
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  Speaker 1: and eventually, according to Sally, the abuse crossed into sexual violence.
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  Speaker 1: Her children later said that they saw Ray choked their
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  Speaker 1: mother more than once. One time they watched him break
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  Speaker 1: her nose. That particular incident actually pushed Sally to report him.
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  Speaker 1: Charges were filed, but that small act of defiance came
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  Speaker 1: with a price. According to Sally and the kids, Ray
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  Speaker 1: came home, found out about the charges, and beat her
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  Speaker 1: until she agreed to drop them. Consent wasn't something Ray
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  Speaker 1: seemed to care about either. Sally said that if she
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  Speaker 1: wasn't in the mood, it didn't matter. He'd force himself
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  Speaker 1: on her, sometimes with pressure, sometimes with fists. By nineteen
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  Speaker 1: ninety five, he had broken five of her bones. One
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  Speaker 1: of those times, a fractured rib punctured her lung. And
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: while all of that was happening behind closed doors, Ray
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  Speaker 1: had another woman. Her name was Mary Anne Myers. According
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: to Sally, Ray had made up his mind to leave
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  Speaker 1: her for mary Anne. He had also decided to spend
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: Valentine's Day with her instead of his wife, but he
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  Speaker 1: didn't exactly announce that. That afternoon, Ray told Sally he
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: was heading out to buy chicken for dinner. In reality,
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  Speaker 1: he was off to spend the evening with his girlfriend,
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  Speaker 1: and whether he planned to or not, he came home eventually.
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  Speaker 1: Some time after ten that night, Ray walked back through
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  Speaker 1: the door. According to Sally, the second he came inside,
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: things exploded into a fight, and this time, she said,
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  Speaker 1: it went too far. That same night, Sally called nine
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  Speaker 1: one one. He just beat me up, she said, and
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  Speaker 1: then she told them she had shot her husband. According
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  Speaker 1: to Sally, when Ray came home that night, things turned
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  Speaker 1: violent fast. She said he slapped her, shoved her to
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: the floor, and started choking her. She managed to squirm away,
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  Speaker 1: ran into the bedroom and grabbed a sawed off shotgun
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  Speaker 1: from the closet. Then she fired twice. One shot hit
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  Speaker 1: Ray in the stomach, the second hit him in the jaw.
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  Speaker 1: When emergency responders arrived, Ray was somehow still alive, but
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  Speaker 1: the damage was too severe. He died in the hospital
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  Speaker 1: two hours later. Sally didn't deny what she did. She
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  Speaker 1: owned it from the beginning, but in court she argued
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  Speaker 1: that this wasn't murder, it was survival. Her legal team
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  Speaker 1: presented a defense based on battered woman syndrome, a concept
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  Speaker 1: used to explain the psychological state of someone trapped in
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  Speaker 1: a long term abusive relationship. In other words, she wasn't
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  Speaker 1: acting out of sudden rage. She was acting out of fear,
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  Speaker 1: feared that it built up over years of violence. The
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  Speaker 1: court didn't see it as a clear case of self defense,
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  Speaker 1: but they didn't hit her with first degree murder either.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: Sally was convicted of second degree murder and sentenced to
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  Speaker 1: nineteen years to life. She served her time nineteen years
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  Speaker 1: behind bars. In twenty twenty, she was released on parole.
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  Speaker 1: She's since remarried. She's a grandmother now, and her story,
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  Speaker 1: like so many others caught in the overlap of domestic
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  Speaker 1: violence and the criminal justice system, still sparks debate. Thanks
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: for listening to ten Minute Murder, binge able true crime stories.
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: I'm Joe the host, and Yeah, sometimes the real story
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: isn't just about what happened, but why someone felt like
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  Speaker 1: that was the only option left. Sally McNeil's case is complicated,
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: it's messy. It's on Netflix, by the way, and it
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  Speaker 1: forces you to ask hard questions about fear, about control,
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  Speaker 1: and what survival looks like when no one is coming
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: to help. Was it murder, was it self defense? Or
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: was it both? Hey, if you're new here, hit follow
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• 11:19
  Speaker 1: See you next time.