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September 2 – Willing Before Certain · The Daily Ripples Podcast

• 0:03
  Welcome back, everybody, to the Daily Ripples podcast.
• 0:07
  Today is Wednesday, if you can believe it already.
• 0:11
  September the 2nd and our devotional today is titled Willing Before Certain.
• 0:16
  I've got myself.
• 0:17
  I've got Corey here with me.
• 0:19
  You've got a phone and a way to listen.
• 0:22
  So we're all ready.
• 0:23
  The stone.
• 0:24
  Spiritual growth begins not when I have all the answers, but when I become willing to take the next step.
• 0:29
  Ripple one is practical.
• 0:31
  Today, I will not wait until every doubt is resolved before moving forward.
• 0:36
  Willingness opens doors that certainty never can.
• 0:40
  A teachable heart is often more important than complete understanding.
• 0:44
  Thank God for that.
• 0:45
  Ripple 2 is spiritual.
• 0:47
  As I walk forward faithfully, the Holy Spirit provides assurance and certainty.
• 0:52
  often before I realize it is happening.
• 0:54
  Following Christ's teaching to come and see before I fully understand, I'm led into deeper faith one step at a time.
• 1:03
  And of course, we'll have the prayer for the end of the episode.
• 1:07
  But obviously, you know, I think it's throughout the scriptures that, you know, come and see that I had, you know, in quotes in the spiritual ripple.
• 1:16
  I mean, that was one of the earliest, you know, invitations that Jesus gave, you know, to his disciples when he was calling them.
• 1:23
  You know, he would say, come and see.
• 1:25
  He would also say a lot in there.
• 1:26
  He would say, follow me, you know.
• 1:28
  Um, and These disciples, when Jesus was calling them, they may have heard a little bit about him, but they were really just relying on that spirit within them.
• 1:39
  Now, I think that those people who were open and willing, his his initial disciples, you know, says, it's kind of like the title of this devotional today willing before certain.
• 1:49
  You can't tell me that, you know, Peter, James, and John and all those 12 disciples were certain about, you know, who Jesus was in the beginning, but we see that they weren't, because they continually questioned, you know, his teachings and everything that he said so that they could understand it and they continued to misunderstand it.
• 2:04
  But all Jesus said to them was come and see.
• 2:07
  You know, if you if you keep coming, you might say, to use recovery language, if you keep coming back, you're going to catch on to this.
• 2:14
  You're going to learn some things about it.
• 2:16
  And before I turn it over to you, Corey, though, I do have a service, really, the question within your own home.
• 2:22
  You know, you were talking the other day about, you know, things have to start in your home, your occupations and your affairs.
• 2:28
  You have to take this program everywhere.
• 2:29
  So do you make the coffee for your significant other?
• 2:34
  Yeah, you do?
• 2:36
  That's good.
• 2:37
  That's very biblical because the Bible says Hebrews.
• 2:39
  Anyway, Corey.
• 2:41
  We apologize.
• 2:43
  That's our only dad joke for the day.
• 2:45
  Sorry.
• 2:45
  Oh.
• 2:47
  Yeah, no, but I just make it, I mean, I could act like I'm nice about it, but I just get up earlier than everybody.
• 2:53
  That's right, yeah.
• 2:57
  You know, I'll tell you this.
• 2:59
  You know, when I got locked up this last time,
• 3:03
  I, uh, I was in a, uh, they put me in the suicide sale, right?
• 3:09
  And suicide sale looks like you're naked, and they give you a man, a suicide man, and if you're up to your description, because it's only about half a body leak, to either halfway, you cover yourself up.
• 3:22
  We use that as a pillet.
• 3:24
  And after about 2.5 weeks in this room, like not leaving and, you know, going through this.
• 3:32
  finally got a court day.
• 3:34
  And, um, I went down.
• 3:39
  So wait, just to put, just to make sure I understand this quickly.
• 3:41
  You spent 2.5 weeks in a room with just a little mat.
• 3:45
  I mean, did you get breaks to get let out for anything?
• 3:47
  So you didn't even get outside time or nothing like that?
• 3:50
  Wow.
• 3:51
  And they'd only give you like 6 to 8 pieces of toilet paper day.
• 3:55
  Oh man, it's you had, they brought you your tray, but it was a Styrofoam, but they would give you utensils, show you how to use your hands.
• 4:03
  Yeah.
• 4:04
  But man, like, you know, what's interesting about someone like me.
• 4:08
  is after about, you know, a couple nights sleep, and me playing with this and this delusional thing.
• 4:16
  When I went into that courtroom, I remember sitting in this courtroom with my lawyer.
• 4:23
  And, you know, the reason I say this, you know, I can under, you know, I like how you put in here, a teachable heart is more often important than the, than complete understanding, because I've understood who I am for a long time.
• 4:37
  And when I went to that courtroom.
• 4:40
  For 15 felonies.
• 4:43
  Which ate were gun related.
• 4:46
  I told, the only thing I said to my warrior is I said, tell the judge, I will mark guns back.
• 4:53
  They said, that's not a good towel right now, I'm bored.
• 4:56
  And I said, I don't care if that's not what I'm, that's what I'm paying you to do.
• 5:00
  And so like, you know, how the ego rebuilds, right?
• 5:05
  What a crazy thing that is for someone, you know, to see that.
• 5:08
  And you know, when I got out, you know, wasn't done, right?
• 5:10
  I, like when then when I, then I go back into another tree.
• 5:14
  You know, it's constantly. Because, you know, before, you know, I remember calling my sponsored today.
• 5:20
  Yeah, in between there before, anyways, I called him because I failed the drug test. After I got out, I failed my bond condition and I called my sponsor today and I said, hey, man, because I like test.
• 5:34
  I was on testosterone.
• 5:35
  Yeah.
• 5:35
  And I said, I need to find a treatment center that will let me take testosterone while I'm in there.
• 5:43
  And he hung off the phone.
• 5:45
  Yeah, you're still making conditions.
• 5:46
  Right, conditions.
• 5:48
  And so, like, I'll be willing if EcoWire Z-Hap. Right.
• 5:52
  And so on page 28 of the big book, it says, we, in our turn, sought the same escape while the desperation of drowning men.
• 6:02
  Yeah, cut, so that says to me to kind of the same, the same kind of thing is like I had to have the desperation of a drowning man to have the willingness to be teachable for someone like me.
• 6:15
  You know, I don't I don't wake up one day, you know, after some time and, you know, for me, it wasn't just a decision.
• 6:22
  It was me broken, uh, to do something different because, you know, I just never been broken.
• 6:29
  Yeah, like, it's like, you know, I finally got broken down enough time to let this God thing come in.
• 6:35
  And when I did that, right?
• 6:37
  You know, so I come into this now of looking at this, it says spiritual, well, it says right here, spiritual growth begins when not when I have all the answers, but when I become willing to take the next step.
• 6:51
  And so am I willing to take the next step. And then at that point in my life, you know, I got to a place of just breaking down and breaking down and breaking down.
• 6:59
  And you could tell me it's in psalm somewhere.
• 7:01
  Where's this song?
• 7:02
  Where is it in the Psalms where it says, you know, we had to be broken for God to come in?
• 7:07
  Can't think of what psalms it is.
• 7:10
  You know, there's like 150 or 200 songs, right?
• 7:12
  And you're, well, you're supposed to have all versus this.
• 7:14
  Well, well, verse doesn't mean a didactic memory where I have it all memorized, you know?
• 7:18
  That's, uh, well, I'm not gonna
• 7:20
  not going to make a comment about that anyway.
• 7:22
  Anyways, but, you know, but when I was, you know, when I was teachable, you know, today I like this, I teach.
• 7:30
  So serious question, you may know this.
• 7:32
  I don't know why you may know this, but I'm just curious.
• 7:34
  For those who, um, you know, practice, you know, Islam, you know, that that follow the Koran.
• 7:41
  Isn't there something in there about, um, is it one of their like spiritual practices, actually the memorization of the verses, like to be able to recite, you know, the Koran by memory?
• 7:51
  I think they, anyway, I think they push it way more.
• 7:54
  If I research it later and find out I'm wrong, this will absolutely be cut out of this episode. But what cool thing?
• 8:00
  I mean nothing against that.
• 8:01
  Yeah, yeah, no, not at all.
• 8:03
  I'm saying that that's something that, you know, we people of the Christian faith, you know, could learn from, you know, to actually focus more on memorization, not just so that we could write it off, but to me, memorization, divorce from application is worthless.
• 8:16
  Absolutely, but at the same, at the same time, right?
• 8:21
  If I know, memorize the information, yeah, if I more easily pull it to mind, I could do it, right, if I don't know, then I don't know.
• 8:31
  Right.
• 8:31
  Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 8:32
  And that's a that's probably a freedom too, not knowing.
• 8:34
  Yeah, and that's the thing too, coming back to your question about, you know, which out of the 148 or whatever Psalms, you know, is related to your comment there.
• 8:43
  It's one of those things that, you know, I'll hear things that I'll know that it's in the Bible, and I'll know how to find it in the Bible, because I don't know about where it is.
• 8:50
  Uh, but I don't have, you know, exact, you know, memorization is done.
• 8:54
  And part of that is because, as you pointed out, I think the other day, um, and every time you read a Bible verse, you'll say something about this is what my version says versus your version.
• 9:04
  because in English, man, there's at least, you know, probably 50 different translations and interpretations, you know, of scripture that are out there to choose from.
• 9:14
  anyway.
• 9:16
  No, we kind of sidetracked on your question.
• 9:18
  Oh, it's Psalms 34 18.
• 9:20
  That's what I was going to say, Corey.
• 9:22
  The Lord is closed to put on broken.
• 9:25
  Oh, you're talking about Psalms 3418, Corey.
• 9:27
  right.
• 9:28
  See, I'm gonna cut this and put it back.
• 9:29
  No I'm kidding.
• 9:30
  The Lord is close to the broken hearter and save those who are crushed in spirit.
• 9:36
  Yeah, yeah.
• 9:37
  That's how I think about that, right?
• 9:38
  is what he did for both of us.
• 9:39
  Yeah.
• 9:40
  It's a simple, but like, without the broken-hearted, right?
• 9:44
  Yeah.
• 9:45
  My life is still working, even though it might not be if you're not broken-hearted, yeah.
• 9:49
  Yeah, and like, you know, to the degree of, you know, alcohols, right?
• 9:53
  The degree of alcohol, right?
• 9:56
  I was thinking about this the other day when I was driving.
• 9:58
  I have break conversations with myself driving.
• 10:00
  We all do.
• 10:02
  Oh yeah, absolutely.
• 10:03
  Me too.
• 10:03
  I do really good talks too.
• 10:04
  Oh, let's just record them.
• 10:07
  But, uh... I, uh, I will say, sometimes you do.
• 10:11
  Is't that what we call the wave?
• 10:12
  Well, I'm not driving. I'm doing, though.
• 10:15
  That'd be crazy.
• 10:15
  Thank God.
• 10:16
  Um, But like, you know, life's still gonna happen.
• 10:20
  That thing's happened, you know, to the degree that I used to live, though.
• 10:26
  You know, the way I used to live is, oh, well, I got a DUI.
• 10:30
  We used to call him Dewey's.
• 10:31
  I'd do it better than DVR.
• 10:32
  I've heard people say that too.
• 10:34
  Yeah, I have sporting.
• 10:35
  But yeah, there's still speed bumps in the road.
• 10:37
  And just like, you know, me getting a, like a confrontational little argument with my fiance today.
• 10:45
  You know, they're just little speed bumps, but the speed bumps are so much smaller.
• 10:49
  I'm not on this big roller coaster around radio.
• 10:51
  It's like the bunny hills.
• 10:52
  That's a lot of fun.
• 10:53
  Well, I kind of think of it as it's a speed bump today and not a sinkhole.
• 10:57
  Right.
• 10:57
  Right?
• 10:58
  I mean, that's a big difference there with that one.
• 11:01
  I was actually thinking back to, you know, with this topic, and something you were sharing earlier, really pinged on it, made me think of it, about, uh, this willingness, you know, before the for the certainty of having that teachable heart.
• 11:17
  That is how I even got back into, you know, the faith to begin with.
• 11:23
  But so back a couple years before I ever stopped drinking and decided to get sober and stay sober.
• 11:31
  Um, I was talking with, it was while I was still uh, actively, you know, professing to be anyway, atheist at the time. And I used to argue with people, man, about things of faith and I would try to reason and logic people out of their beliefs and faith, you know, and it was a horrible thing to do, but it was because I had so much pride and ego that I thought I was right, you know?
• 11:51
  And I was sitting with a coworker one time and having this, you know, probably the 1000000th conversation, debating matters of faith.
• 11:58
  And she asked me, uh, she said, well, what makes you think that you, that you are right, and the 1000000000s, 1000000s, whatever, of other people that have ever believed in God are wrong.
• 12:10
  And I...
• 12:13
  It caught me off guard.
• 12:14
  The question did.
• 12:15
  I actually respected the coworker enough to think about the question and I had to sit with it.
• 12:20
  And it wasn't too long after that that I couldn't get rid of the question, you know, God, I think God used her and that question to get my attention.
• 12:28
  And, um, eventually, you know, uh, probably within 6 months, I was going back to church trying to explore, you know, had that willingness trying to explore.
• 12:37
  And I resonate in the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous on page 49, it says toward the bottom of the page, we have learned that whatever the human frailties of various faiths may be, those faiths have given purpose and direction to 1000000s.
• 12:53
  And that's really where I came to with it was my own faith.
• 12:57
  It's like, if this is giving purpose and direction to 1000000s of people, then there must be something to it.
• 13:03
  You know, I started exploring that.
• 13:05
  Now, I never would have grown, we were talking about yesterday.
• 13:09
  I think the topic was growing in understanding.
• 13:11
  You know, I never would have grown an understanding if I had stayed locked in and just going to church and still drinking the way that I was drinking. Because I did that for a couple years until I got sober.
• 13:22
  And I did not have that strong relationship with God at that time.
• 13:25
  I had to clear away the alcohol out of my system so that God could really, you know, get a hold of me and really work changes in me and through other people in me.
• 13:35
  Well, you would have the strongest relationship with you that you could have at that moment.
• 13:42
  Of course, yeah, right.
• 13:43
  Yeah.
• 13:43
  Yeah.
• 13:43
  And so I think I, uh, my ego will take me into places still today, you know, because it's, it does say on page 30 is the delusion that where like other people are presently maybe has to be smashed.
• 13:57
  So that means you're special.
• 13:58
  Right.
• 13:59
  And so I'll come up with this grand, fantastic scheme of, man, I got this way to live.
• 14:06
  Well, it's not that.
• 14:08
  It's, I have to live this way, or I do, you know, because where I die, or I, for me, you know, where an alcoholic's death is, you know, what does that look like?
• 14:17
  It could be dead, it could be, you know, whatever.
• 14:19
  But, you know, in full flight from reality, that's what my life looks like.
• 14:24
  Um, but I think like, you know, whatever you're doing, this, like most people are whatever they're doing, you know, because most people do.
• 14:30
  aren't living the way that we lived.
• 14:34
  And that's a cool thing too.
• 14:35
  Right. Oh, yeah, we're on spiritual means without coming to this darkest place of their life.
• 14:41
  Right. And, But at this, because just at the same time, like when I'm sitting in these cells, right?
• 14:47
  One thing we always have to establish with individuals is common power.
• 14:52
  Because if we don't, like, it's almost like, you know, if I'm happy and this dude's man, well, that doesn't change.
• 14:59
  But have you ever noticed coming into a conversation and coming down to his level of the same that and be like, man, I don't like that person either.
• 15:08
  Then we got this common problem, this person.
• 15:11
  So now we bonded, though.
• 15:14
  Now we got that bond.
• 15:14
  Well, what's the solution?
• 15:15
  Well, we go trip the person.
• 15:17
  No, I'm kidding.
• 15:18
  So, is that how we get people to stop gossiping so much?
• 15:24
  Is we just make it to everybody they don't like each other and that we don't have the commonality of complaining about something?
• 15:28
  I'm kidding.
• 15:29
  I don't know who got, like, you know, I'm not in the,
• 15:31
  I'm like, the cool thing, the place, the position me and my family are and at least some of these rooms that we hang around at is she gets to deal with all the gossiping.
• 15:40
  I don't because nobody, you know, and that's interesting too.
• 15:44
  Because nobody, unless they are in some serious trouble, or unless they're friends with me.
• 15:51
  Call me.
• 15:52
  They, you know, 9 times out of 10, yeah.
• 15:55
  iPhone does not ring.
• 15:57
  My fiance's phone rings off the hook.
• 16:00
  Yeah, yeah.
• 16:01
  And it's funny though, because, like, you know, but I think it's great because, like, man, like, you know, I get to watch her do this.
• 16:08
  But, you know, people don't want to hear me when they call me, say, well, hey, you know, why don't you go look at this page?
• 16:15
  Why don't you just quit, you know, make an excuse and be a better dude.
• 16:18
  Oh yeah, people get aggravated with me too.
• 16:21
  When I always turn it around and say, well, essentially some variation of what was your part in it?
• 16:26
  You know, because I always, through the program, I always turn it around.
• 16:30
  Now, I've learned through other means, like if I'm providing, you know, pastoral care, you know, to somebody.
• 16:35
  that's one of my pressures, I'm going to be very gentle about that question, right?
• 16:40
  But if it's somebody like, like you and the program or whatever that's familiar with the 4th step and the principals and all that kind of stuff.
• 16:46
  Yeah, I'll get right to it and be like, well, what's your part in that court?
• 16:49
  You know, like if you were calling to complain about something kind of thing.
• 16:52
  And that's just part of that accountability and love aspect.
• 16:55
  See, I, uh, yeah, it's funny because I'll complain, I called my culture one day.
• 17:00
  I was complaining about something I had to do with money.
• 17:03
  It was money because I, you know, I give most significant others some money every week.
• 17:07
  If she's, she doesn't work, she takes her baby. She wanted more, and anyways, I was told him, I said, yeah, no, yeah.
• 17:17
  And I was like, well, why do you be a good provider and go make more money?
• 17:21
  So, you know, but, you know, seriously, like, you know, but, you know, that's irrelevant, but at the same time, you know, there's a problem, there's a solution.
• 17:34
  Yeah.
• 17:36
  And, you know, I think, but that's the thing.
• 17:37
  I mean, those are that's a real life thing that crops up, you know, no matter how much time we have sober, no matter how high and holy we are in the church.
• 17:46
  I mean, the real world problems, you know, keep coming and that's where, again, you know, it ties back into, we're never going to have the certainty or the full understanding of exactly how to even, you know, face or address, those problems that today may seem small compared to problems that we've had in the past.
• 18:03
  But man, I thank God for the small problems today because I don't have then problems that I used to have, you know, number one.
• 18:09
  And, and the reason why I don't have the big problems that I used to have is because I've been willing to try to live this way of life.
• 18:18
  Yeah, our prayer for today.
• 18:21
  Father God, given me the willingness to follow you, even when I do not see the whole path, through your Holy Spirit, strengthen my faith as I take each step, shape my life through the example of Jesus.
• 18:33
  Amen.
• 18:34
  Amen.