Latest / Building the Best You / Energy Healing for Personal Transformation

Transcript

Energy Healing for Personal Transformation · Building the Best You

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I'm a huge fan of encouraging people to spend time with themselves, to get to know yourself, to build a relationship with yourself, because it's the most important relationship you have and it's the only one you have from birth to death.
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: The only one.
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: Welcome to the House of Jermar podcast, where wellness starts within.
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: The House of Germar is a lifestyle brand, empowering women to live all in through interior design and personal wellness.
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: We are a destination for women ready to reimagine what is possible in their homes and lives and then create it.
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: We are honored to have you join us on our mission to empower 1 million women to live all in.
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: I am your host, jean Collins, and I invite you to become inspired by this week's guest.
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: Welcome to the House of Germar podcast, where wellness starts within.
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: I'm your host, jean Collins, and today we are talking about energy.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: My guest is Allison Canavan Allie, as I'm going to call her, and let me tell you just before we started recording doing a moment of breathing and energy work to connect.
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: And, guys, I got to tell you this is so special.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: So Allie is a speaker, she's a motivational speaker, she does energy work, she does healing, she has coursework, so you have to follow her on Instagram.
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: I'm going to link it in the bio.
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: And, allie, welcome to the House of Germar podcast.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for having me, Jean.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: I'm so excited to be here with you.
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: It's going to be so much fun.
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: So, just so everybody knows how I got to meet you, you were referred to me by Courtney Myers, who has a podcast called Intentional Living, and I was fortunate to be a guest on her show and she was also a guest on mine, and when I first met her, we just connected on so many different things and so after the recording, we started talking about different people that she knew and different things in her journey, and your name came up and your name came up as a speaker, but then your name also came up as an energy person and someone she thought I would really connect with.
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: And so I reached out to you and we had a call about your speaking business and you were so kind and gave me a lot of insights about your career and different things and we just so connected and while we're talking, I was like would you be willing to be on my show, because I think what you do is so important, and so, thank you.
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: I feel so blessed that you are making the time to be on the show, so thank you, thank you.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: Oh, thank you, and I love Courtney and I love how all these connections happen energetically, right Cause it's all energetically.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: We're chatting to someone they're like who do you think would vibe with me, who do you think is like on the same page as me, energetically, and then these beautiful connections happen and it's one of the things that I say, that's the beauty of today's world with, you know, doing things online and being able to connect to people, no matter where we are, like not just in our local space that we're in.
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: And she has been a huge inspiration to me, especially of recent times, and she's a hugely special person.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: I love her.
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: Oh, me too.
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she had talked about energy.
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: She has just a really unique energy and I have such respect for her professionally as well.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: I always say to people she produces one of the best podcasts out there.
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: Yes, and she does it all by herself.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: So from a career perspective, I have the utmost respect for her as well.
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: I love to share people's career journeys and their life journeys because I think it's so inspiring for women in particular to hear that life is not you know, a, b, c, d, and people often see us as public people on social media and they're like, wow, look at all they do, but yet they don't see everything that had to happen to get to where we are, and a lot of times that's a lot of work.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: A lot of times that's a lot of heartbreak.
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: But I think those stories and those journeys are really inspiring for people and I personally am always willing to share that story and share my story and be vulnerable about it.
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: So I would love if you would share some of your career story with the audience, because yours is not linear either.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: No, it's definitely not linear.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: And I was talking to a young girl over the weekend and she was just in this panic.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: She's like I just feel like my friends are doing this and this is this and this is happening and I should have, I should be engaged, I probably should have a kid by now and I just went.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: Oh, let's take a moment.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: And I'm going to tell you a little bit about my path afterwards, because I always believe God puts people on our path.
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: You know, works both ways for a reason.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: If we're awake and aware to notice the signs and synchronicities, and I just said to her, you're on your own path with your own timing, and we're not all meant to follow this construct that society has set out for us.
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: Because, quite frankly, if we were, people wouldn't be so unhappy and overwhelmed and unhealthy, right, like if everything was working beautifully, you know, we wouldn't have one of the worst mental health epidemics we've ever had.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: So I started modeling.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: As people can probably tell, my accent is not from the US, so I'm from Ireland, from Dublin.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: I grew up one of five girls in Dublin city and fairly normal upbringing, but started like pretty much a tomboy growing up and never really had any interest in beauty or modeling or anything like that.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: Like I wasn't one of those girls that got all the magazines and wanted to spend hours doing makeup, like.
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: In fact, I used to get really frustrated when my friends would take an hour and a half to do their makeup and hair and I'm like, come on, just run out the door.
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: Come on, just run out the door.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: And so I remember at 15, my dad's friend, cindy Cofolo, put me in for a modeling competition in Ireland and I won that.
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: That was called Head to Toe.
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: And then a few months later I was representing Ireland in the Ford Supermodel of the World competition in Las Vegas, and so it went from like zero to a hundred.
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: It was like all of a sudden, I remember my dad's best friend's wife was this gorgeous designer and she made me all these bespoke dresses for the competition.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: And so after that I went straight to work in Paris for Ford agency and as soon as I left school I went to London and I modeled full-time there and so my career took me.
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: I modeled all over Europe and then I was down in South Africa and Australia for a while Germany everywhere and then I moved to New York in my early twenties, spent a decade there that was kind of a base and worked all over.
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: So for here in the States I did a lot of the shows when I was younger and then when I came to the States I did a lot of the Dillards and JCPenney's and Macy's and you know I was quite a commercial catalog girl here in the States and we were talking about distance and I said actually it reminds me of living in Manhattan and I lived on the Upper West Side and I said no one would come and visit me.
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: I said that's kind of like us.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: Now I said people who live down in the West Village and you know anywhere below kind of Times Square would be like where do you live?
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: And I'm like 85th and Central Park and they're like oh yeah, no, we're not going up there.
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: That's like 55 million miles away.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: So I said it kind of feels like that sweetheart, because his birthday is next week and we were talking about where we have a party and we're half an hour drive away in the house and I was laughing and I said God, everything on the micro is on the macro, even in somewhere like Manhattan.
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: You know the way people perceive distance and time.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: So we were laughing and joking yesterday and I said, gosh, you know, I did love living in New York City.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: I did love the energy of that city.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: I was also blessed to live right beside Central Park, on the entrance to the park, so I could wake up in the morning and go for a walk.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: But even though there was parts of that that were amazing and I was traveling like a lot of life, there was a darker side and I'd always struggled with my mental health from a very early age.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: Struggled with my mental health, so I wasn't particularly confident and I certainly did not feel good in my body.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: And so all of a sudden, I was like modeling and doing runway shows and bikinis and doing catalogs, and like I look back now, like we all can, and I look at the photographs and I'm like what was wrong with me?
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: Oh my God, like my gosh, what was wrong with me?
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: Like the standards that we have for beauty and like that was a time when, you know, magazines weren't even as Photoshopped as they are today.
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: Like now everyone has filters and social media.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: I don't know if I would have made it, because I was so paranoid as it was, without social media.
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my God, the pressure that young people have today and the ridiculous standards that we set for beauty.
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: Right, it's incredible.
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: And so from a very early age I struggled with depression and anxiety.
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: Every doctor, therapist, everyone I went to you know was like you're just depressed and anxious, that's who you are.
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: And I took that on as like an identity, almost like as people were saying to me you are an anxious person, you're depressed.
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: I remember one doctor saying to me you've just got a melancholy personality.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: I was like really Fuck, because, excuse me, no cursing on podcast.
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: Sorry about that.
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: You can curse on podcast, it's okay, and I was like wow.
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: And then I was going wow because when I go out and I drink, I'm the life and soul of the party.
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: Ooh, so dangerous, right.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: So I'm being told something about myself.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: You know you're depressed and anxious.
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: Yes, when I go out and have a couple of glasses of wine, I'm literally the life and soul of the party.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: Like party alley was an identity, had the best time, loved partying.
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: You know, invite Ali to your party.
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: She'd be the last person to leave.
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: There'll be a sing song, there'll be some Irish dancing, like it's fun, and so that, like, I started drinking really young.
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: Like you know, I was modeling at 15, traveling the world, so I was drinking backstage at fashion shows when I was traveling.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: Like living in London as well, there was a huge culture of drinking at lunchtime which I was thrilled about at the time.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: So every single thing I did was associated with alcohol, which it is kind of in Ireland anyway, to be honest with you.
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: So as a culture, I'm just like throwing it out there.
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: But unfortunately for me, what happened is I was not only medicated for my depression and anxiety, but I self-medicated, and we can get away with that for quite a while until we can't, and what happens is the lows become lower.
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: So we need the highs to be higher and we need more of what we're taking to work, and eventually it ends up in a big mess, which it did Now.
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: I had my son will be 14 next week and I always say he is the angel that came to save me in so many ways.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: And when I found out I was pregnant, that was probably the time in my life that I was the healthiest Like I meditated every day, I really took care of myself, and then I was breastfeeding and everything.
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: And I remember the first night I went out and I was like I don't have a drink problem anymore, bearing in mind I had, like spent, you know, 10 years in NA and AA in New York City, and it was kind of amazing to me that as soon as I was pregnant, when it wasn't about me anymore, no problem, no problem, no problem taking care of myself.
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: And I remember the first night I went out, I think I rolled in at 5 AM, I was violently ill and my mom opened the bathroom door I was living with her at the time and she just said nice to see, you've changed.
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: And it was like someone stabbing me in the stomach because a part of me knew I was like oh, you have never been in control of this and you certainly are not now, like that's for sure.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: So, to put it into context, I was 32, had broken up with my partner, decided that it would be a good idea to come home to Ireland because my family would be there for support.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: Right, that's a whole other podcast, exactly, yeah, right, uh-huh, yeah, yeah, we can talk family as a whole, separate conversation, a whole new podcast.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: Uh-huh, it's a whole separate conversation it's like a whole new podcast and moved back in with my mom at 32 into the house I'd grown up with, and just when James was born, I think, I had 50 euro in my bank account.
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: My sister and her husband bought me a car so that I could drive.
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: Like literally, I was so broke and I was also so full of shame and guilt.
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: It was almost like I kept thinking to myself how do teenage mothers do this?
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: Because I was well-known in Ireland.
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: I had modeled since I was very young, so I'd been in the newspapers a lot.
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: So when you're in that environment, people have no problem coming up to you and saying stuff to you on the street, people that don't know you, and I remember people saying things like wow, you know, you were such a successful model.
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: Like you know, it must be very disappointing for you to be back living with your mother or God you know and being becoming a single mother and living with your mom.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: How did that?
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: Now, I know that's unbelievable.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: Yes, now I know, through the work I've done, though, that we're always mirroring back what's going on inside of us, so even though people were saying this to me, I was actually thinking it about myself.
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: So you know, with the spiritual work I've done, I was like how could these people say this to me?
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: And it was like, because you're saying it to you, they're literally reflecting back your own thoughts about yourself.
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: So I haven't taken any medication for 13 years.
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: I've been sober now for a decade and my entire life has been transformed.
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: And I always say because of my son, absolutely.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: So my career trajectory was not linear and I went to UCLA in my late 30s and I always say to people it doesn't have to go the way society tells you.
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: It's your path, is your path.
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: You will walk your path at the exact time for you and if you trust and that's my word of the year this year is trust and if you trust and you surrender and you decide to listen to your own guidance system and your intuition and your connection to spirit, everything's going to work out.
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: It always does.
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: I love the word trust.
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: Oh, yes, that is a crazy story and but as you're saying it, I can.
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: I expected that you were going to say that people were going to judge and people were going to criticize, and I think the testament that you and we can talk about this more, the testament of how you overcame that, because that is like emotional abuse, it happens, it happens again and again, and again, and it beats your spirit down and it beats your energy down.
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: And what did you do to get yourself out of that?
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: Because that is a trap that is pretty easy, quite honestly, for us to get into.
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: So we have the victim consciousness, which is the first, and it's the why me stage.
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: This is why is everything happening to me?
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: And it's kind of like everyone's doing this to me.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: The world is happening to me.
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: The world is so unfair, and that's the frequency, the vibration we're living at, and so that's what we're attracting in all the time.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: The next stage is when we kind of wake up and go oh, sugar, I have a co-responsibility here.
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: Uh, oh, sugar, I have a co-responsibility here.
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: The reason I'm where I am is because of all the choices I've made so far and that's like a very uncomfortable moment, jean, especially in the world of addiction.
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: I work with a lot of people in recovery and like, let's talk about addiction today, with addiction to our phones.
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: Like people, when they talk about addiction, go oh, addiction, you know people who are alcoholics and drug addicts and I'm like no, are you scrolling on your phone all day long?
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: Are you using you know food to numb out?
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: Are you in codependent relationships?
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: Can you be on your own and be really happy in your own company?
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: Or when you're on your own, like I used to, would you panic?
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: I used to hate being on my own.
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: Like being on my own for any length of time would actually cause me to have anxiety.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: I just did not like being on my own with my own thoughts, and so you know off partying and just being out for the sake of being out, because I don't want to be on my own.
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: So the second stage is where we start to realize oh, hold on a second, I have a co-responsibility here and we start to take responsibility.
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: The third phase is more through me, and it's when we're in this flow with life, and I'm sure anyone listening will know when you have these days where you just feel like everything is synchronized.
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: We woke up, we got into the flow of life and we're going with the tide instead of ferociously swimming against it.
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: And the last stage of consciousness is, as me, and this is what we call enlightenment, buddhist consciousness, christ consciousness and this is more when we're saying I'm awake.
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: I'm awake, and the goal of this life is to be awake more than asleep in the dream, and is to wake up.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: And so my path of awakening has been slow at times, and then I had a spontaneous awakening in 2018, but then it's kind of slowed and integrated again.
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: But I've been on this I fear, constant awakening journey.
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: I started meditating in my late teens, early twenties, and was attending Buddhist retreats and going on silent retreats.
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: So I had this crazy life in New York and then I would go upstate New York and attended three-day silent retreat life in New York.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: And then I would go upstate New York and attended three-day silent retreat and I could not understand how I couldn't sustain and hold on to what I had experienced over the weekend.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: There was this gross kind of disconnection within me of what I was doing on a day-to-day basis.
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: So a part of me has always been yearning for soul-spiritual connection.
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: A part of me has always been yearning for soul spiritual connection.
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: And nobody like the doctors I went to, the therapists I went to, like nobody was connecting dots, helping me connect dots, saying you know what are you eating?
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: Like it probably would have been a good idea for somebody early on to say how much are you drinking and say, oh, I think that's got something to do with your chronic depression and anxiety, because guess what, when I got sober, 90% of my depression and anxiety went with it.
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: Who knew right, who knew.
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: So I think the world today, jean, is definitely a lot better from that perspective, but I still think we are very disconnected in how we approach our wellbeing and our health.
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: I still think it's like go to a specialist for this, as if, like different parts of ourselves are separate and we're one unit, like we've got to look at life from a full 360 perspective mind, body and spirit.
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: It's like a three-legged stool and if one of those is not being tended to, the stool is going to be unbalanced, and that's the truth of it.
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: We are here to be in union with ourself and to remember who we are and what we are as spiritual beings.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: Having a human experience.
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: Yes, I mean, I think it's really important when we're in the spiritual world and I'm a spiritual teacher, you know to understand how to connect with the human part of us as well.
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: You know a lot of the times when I was doing the spiritual work and I was sitting in 10 day silent retreats and doing the deeper work, it became very much just focused on the spiritual, which can also make us not be in our life.
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: Does that make sense, right?
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: Like you know, everything is about.
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: It's only yeah, it becomes.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: It's only one part.
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: It's only one part of it, not looking at the holistic of what is everything else that you're doing.
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: Exactly.
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: And so for me, I'm like how can we marry the spiritual and the human 3D?
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: And you know years and years of looking, working with people with mental health issues.
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: I'm like what is really going on here and the one thing I have found is people are afraid to feel today for so many reasons.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know if people were afraid to feel in Jesus's time or Buddha's time, I don't know but I see today that we have cancel culture and people are so afraid to speak their truth because of what somebody else will say, but we're so afraid to feel.
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: We have this really toxic message that goes out to especially our young people If you are struggling and you are feeling sad or depressed or lonely, there's something wrong with you, and that's the part I have a big problem with.
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: There's something wrong with you and that's the part I have a big problem with.
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: Is there something wrong with you?
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: Just because it's an uncomfortable emotion does not mean there's something wrong with you.
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: Is there an aspect of you trying to give you information about what you're experiencing and where you are in your life, a hundred percent?
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: But that does not mean there's something wrong with you, and I think we have to stop that line of messaging, because when I was young it was like listen, if you can't get rid of these difficult emotions, we're going to have to medicate them away.
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: It's like, oh my God.
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: So then you feel really guilty and shameful about feeling sad or grieving, and I remember when my dad died, the doctor was like you know, I'll give you these tablets to help you.
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: Like, well, you know, instead of you grieving and crying and experiencing grief, which is a form of love, we're going to numb you.
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: We're going to numb you and what we're saying to people is I don't trust that you have the capacity to feel your emotions and work through your own stuff.
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: So we're going to come in and we're going to say that if you feel these, well then you need to take a pill and make it disappear.
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: And I always say to people where do you think those emotions are going?
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: You think they're just disappearing.
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: You think they're just gone.
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: You think they're just gone.
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: That's a perfect point.
• 23:10
  Speaker 2: That's perfect.
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: That is a perfect observation.
• 23:13
  Speaker 2: It doesn't disappear, you're just putting a cover over it.
• 23:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and so where does it live?
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: It lives in our physical body like a ticking time bomb ready to come off at usually the most inopportune moments.
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: And I'm like I would definitely be.
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: I'm a fan of feeling it all like welcoming, like I always say, okay, if you were having a dinner party for your feelings.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: You go to the door and you're like you open the door and like, hey, joy, how are you Come in?
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: Or hey, happiness, let's go.
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: And then everyone's like, oh no, here's sadness.
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: Turn off the lights, pretend we're not here.
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: Oh no, here's anger, quick, let them.
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: Hopefully they'll talk long enough outside and they'll just decide to go home by themselves.
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: And it's like you open the door to sadness or anger and they're like, hey guys, why are we always left out here?
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: Why can't we come as well?
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: We're just as important as you, and that's the thing they are just as important.
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: Like those emotions, when channeled and used, can can be so insightful and beneficial for us.
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: Like when we channel anger into like why are you angry?
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: Probably some, somebody has done something to you or you're seeing something in the world that's not right, or you know.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: But as soon as we feel shame about these emotions, we repress them, we suppress them and I teach about energy.
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: And then we become we're not at ease.
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: We're not at ease with ourself, we're not at ease with life, we're cutting ourself off from the good, and then dis-ease starts to manifest and that's all disease is, people say.
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: People say, oh, is alcohol a disease?
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: You know, I hear people saying that it's not a disease and I'm like well, it depends on your interpretation of the word disease.
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: Like, how do you see disease?
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: Do you see it from the allopathic, medical perspective?
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: I see it as your body, mind, spirit crying out for help.
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: And so I'm not at ease and so I'm getting a feedback that something's off.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: So I better, you know, become aware and more present and start to do the work.
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: And so I've been doing the work I feel like, for most of my life, even during the times when I was partying or whatever.
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: And that has just.
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: I just feel we're here to constantly evolve.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: Whether you're eight or 88, your spirit seeks growth.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: You know, it's not an age thing.
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: I was in an industry from when I was 15.
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: People were like, oh my God, what are you going to do for your career?
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: Like, this is such a short-lived career.
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: Oh my, it's like this panic that was induced.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: You know people would speak to you and shoot and go.
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: What are you going to do when this ends?
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: Because if this ends, that's it for you.
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: And I was always like what am I going to?
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: do and I was modeling well into my thirties, I was like, oh my God, I just spent like decades panicking for absolutely no reason.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: It's ridiculous.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: So I'm I'm a huge fan of encouraging people to spend time with themselves, to get to know yourself, to build a relationship with yourself, because it's the most important relationship you have and it's the only one you have from birth to death.
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: The only one All of the relationships.
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: Great point.
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a great point.
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: And your body is the only one you have?
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: Yes, as well.
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's it.
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: This is what you have, and think about how you treat it.
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: I know and I honestly just think about how I treated my poor body.
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: I have so much respect and I just, I always say you're the coach for trillions of cells in your body and those cells are the most incredible team because they literally just do what they're told Like.
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: It's like having the perfect kids If your kids would just do everything you said.
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: That's actually what we do have with our physical body.
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: Your cells are always listening to you for direction with the words you speak.
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: Your word is your wand, with the food you feed it, how you treat your body.
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: Do you take it to sleep, do you wake up?
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: Do you exercise your body?
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: Do you get fresh air?
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: And Dr Emoto did amazing work around the fact that we are 70% water and he's exposed water to frequency and words and prayer and lots of under a microscope and had the most stunning crystalline formations.
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: But if it was words like hate and war and you disgust me, it was like a bomb going off.
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: We are mostly water.
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: So think about the frequency and the energy and the vibration of your body.
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: If you're waking up in the morning and you're looking in the mirror and you're saying, oh, your skin is gross and this is wrong and what do you think the frequency and vibration is going to be?
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: Like that you're holding and I'm like so I teach people about energy and I'm like, everything is energy.
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: We're energetic beings, that's.
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: Everything in this world is energy.
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: Everything has a frequency.
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: This has a frequency.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: It just appears solid because it's vibrating so slowly.
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: But when we start to tune into our own energy and learn the language of your energy, not someone else's, how you cope with stress, how I cope with stress, it's not the same.
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: Some people have an incredible capacity for stress.
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: Some people have a very small capacity for stress.
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: And so I say how do you spend, save and invest your energy every day?
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: And when you start to think about it like that, you start to be able to understand why you're exhausted at two o'clock.
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: Are you spending all your energy really early in the day and you're left?
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: And also, are you depositing into your bank account of energy?
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: If you're going and getting a, say, even ATM, and you're withdrawing money all day long, you know, do you really think when you go back, if you're not depositing anything in, that it's going to keep giving you money?
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: No, because there's no money left.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: It's not your money, none left.
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: And so you know, if we were looking at our bank accounts every day and we were watching them drop by the thousands, would you sit back with your arms folded and go God, look at that, I'm going to be broke soon, that's terrible.
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: Wow, I'm going to start mad, isn't it?
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: I'm going to have no money, you wouldn't.
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: You'd be like, oh my God, my bank account is like depleting.
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: And you'd say I'm going to print out a statement, I'm going to look at it.
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: Hold on a second.
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: Where am I spending all this money?
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: Why don't we do that with ourself?
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: Why don't we like it's not until we get really, really sick or have a complete breakdown or our back is up against the wall that we go okay, hold on.
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: Maybe I should start treating myself better, and I'm not preaching here, I'm talking from experience.
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: Right, yes, of course I really wish there were times in my life that I had listened, before it got to the stage that it did.
• 30:14
  Speaker 2: Because you weren't paying attention.
• 30:15
  Speaker 2: No, which I think you mentioned that in the beginning, and I think that's something that's so important is learning how to pay attention to the signs, to the signs your body's giving you, to the signs the universe is giving you, so that it doesn't get to the point of you're not listening.
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: I'm going to smack you in the face by making you so sick you can't get out of bed or by making people up and leave you in your life.
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: Because I think, if people reflect back, there were signs of these things happening and that change was needed, but they're not paying attention.
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: These things happening and that change was needed, but they're not paying attention.
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: And I think the awakening I want to say your last step was awakening or something of that sense.
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: I think that is so important.
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: Whether you believe in God or not, it's more about being aware of what's happening to your body and in your environment and in your world, and how is that impacting you personally?
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: And I think, like the word God can be very loaded today.
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: I grew up in Catholic Ireland, you know, which was just a fear indoctrination camp.
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: Quite frankly, the God that I connect to is a God of love.
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: For me, god is love, creator, consciousness I studied alchemy for three years.
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: We can call it the field of consciousness.
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: What are you feeding the field?
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: The field is always expanding and growing.
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: What we're feeding it?
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: So we can come at this from a purely scientific perspective for people who are uncomfortable with the word God and go there is a divine intelligence that is at operation.
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry, if you look outside and you look at this incredible world we live in and this incredible body that, like a heart, is beating lungs, breathe the digestive system, and you don't see the connection and the mirroring of us and nature and the different seasons, and there is an incredible and beautiful and perfect divine intelligence at work and there are laws in this universe and when we learn them and align with them, life gets easier.
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: So that's what I mean by like.
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: So, yes, god can be loaded, and there's some people out there who have, you know, religious trauma, like I would say.
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: I'm one of those people that came through the religious trauma.
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: Part of it, because I don't believe that God is fear.
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: I think we're.
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: I know in my heart that we're beings of love and that's what we're remembering, and anything that's not of love is not God in my humble opinion.
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: It's just not.
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: And so fear is very, very low down on the vibrational map of consciousness.
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: If you look at David Orr Hawkins' work and you look at his map of consciousness and you look at the different emotions and he's given them frequencies, it makes perfect sense.
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: And when we're in fear, like we can look at it purely from a physiological dysregulation perspective, like a stress perspective.
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: This is what I love about this work.
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: So for people who struggle with the more esoteric, spiritual aspects of it, we can simplify it and bring it down to when you're stressed, when you're fearful, when you're panicky, your body goes into fight flight mode, and when we're in that mode, the parts of you that are necessary to make good decisions, emotionally regulate, think critically, are actually not available to you.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: The prefrontal cortex turns off, the digestive system shuts down.
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: Like we're super clever, if your body perceives danger in any shape or form, it is going to shut down all necessary aspects of you in order to survive.
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: Now, when think about when you're in fear all the time and your body's in that mode and you're trying to create from that space and you're trying to live a healthy, happy life, it's even the parts of you that you need to be turned on and tuned in are not available to you.
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: So that's why I say to people you've got to understand your stress response.
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: Stress can be an incredible superpower, like we all need a little bit of stress to get us going right.
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: We don't want to be too relaxed either.
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: We're like, yeah, man, you know I'm just going to sit back here and, you know, hope that life works out.
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: You know we are in a new body.
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: You know, taking action I always think people sometimes take.
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: People hear different things right when, especially with spiritual teachings, and I know, as I have evolved, I look back to the messages I heard years ago and I'm like, oh, that's really interesting that you heard that.
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: That's absolutely not what that message is.
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: You know, being in coherence for me is about working with the heart.
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: I'm a heart math facilitator and I think we are in a time right now, in this world of the great awakening, where we are coming home to our heart and we are starting to understand what it's like to live from a more heart, consciousness, space being energy.
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: So the heart is in the middle.
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: We've got the upper chakras, which are connection to spirit, and the lower, which are kind of in our physical body the solar plexus, sacral and root and so the heart is right there in the middle and when we start to breathe and connect with our heart five minutes, heart focused, breathing every day and dropping into our heart space, activating our heart through the power of awareness, the power of touch, and really beginning to tap into your heart's intelligence there is an intelligence in the heart.
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: It's not just an organ that pumps blood around your body.
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: It sends more messages to the brain than the brain sends to the heart.
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: Like that tells us something already.
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: It's got its own heart mind in there, and so I'm a huge fan of every time I do meditation whether it's on stage with 5,000 people or in my one-to-ones we start with the heart-based meditation.
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: It's part of what I've been doing for well over a decade and if you just do that alone, it will open up a part of you that is absolutely transformational.
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: Like, yes, when people start working with the heart, a lot of tears can come, a lot of vulnerability arises, but it's such a beautiful place to live from and it's totally different to being caught in our mind.
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: You know, I have historically been a chronic ruminator.
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: I don't know if anybody listening knows what it's like to overanalyze, overthink everything, hence the anxiety, you know, always coming up with worst case scenarios, making up crazy ass stories that, quite frankly, never existed, because that's what we do.
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: And so, for me, working with the heart and being able to understand my mind a little bit better has been one of the most important and transformational parts of my path.
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: That's amazing.
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: It's so unbelievable.
• 36:56
  Speaker 2: So you mentioned speaking, let's talk about that quickly.
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: How did you get into speaking, and what do you speak about and who do you speak to?
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: Like everything in my life.
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: It was an accident and that has been part of my path, where I've been like this is what I'm going to do.
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: This is what I'm going to do.
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: When I went back to Ireland when I had my baby, I was doing a lot of TV and a lot of radio, and so corporates started inviting me to come in and tell my story, and schools started going in to talk to schools, especially to young girls, about eating disorders, which I struggled with and you know alcohol and drug use and various different things, and so I found that younger people were able to connect with, especially the story of being a model and the pressures, because that's what they're going through as well.
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: And then I started to do bigger and bigger talks and, before I knew it, this was my job.
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: I was like, wow, I'm a speaker and I was getting direct bookings to come to the States.
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: And in 2018, I got a direct booking to come and do a talk for an amazing company called Dealer Inspire and Mel Robbins and Dan Harris and lots of people were speaking that day, and that started my journey to moving full-time to the States.
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: So what I do is I go into corporates and I do work on energy management, so I teach about stress resilience, how people understand the connection to themselves.
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: I have a journal called Change your Day the Five Minute Way, so it's five minutes in the morning and the evening and that's based on neuroscience and gratitude and the power of intention and it's an incredibly transformational journal.
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: It's so simple but it's taken about eight years to bring it down to those two pages of various different aspects of the journal.
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: And then for corporate big, big conferences, I'm usually the opening speaker, so in conferences people are exhausted If you're in a room of 5,000 people by the usually the opening speaker.
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: So in conferences people are exhausted.
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: If you're in a room of 5,000 people, by the time it's like lunchtime, you're exhausted.
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: And by the time you come back after lunch you are not paying attention, you're taking in very little of what the speakers say.
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: So I teach people grounding practices, how to protect your own energy and how to clear your energy.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: So I do motivational energy management, the power of transformation, and I teach people the power of meditation and breath work, and so I love it Like it has.
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: It's one of the most fun things in the world to share with people because these practices are free.
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: Like, your breath is free.
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: You can do it anywhere, anytime.
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: It's the most underused resource we have.
• 39:35
  Speaker 1: If you're sitting in a car, someone cuts you off, go to your breath.
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: If you're after getting an email that's after activating you go to your breath.
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: You can do breath work for 10 minutes.
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: If you're on a long journey, you can breathe in for two, breathe out for four, breathe in for three, breathe out for six.
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: You can breathe in for two, breathe out for four, breathe in for three, breathe out for six.
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: Like.
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: Your breath is your greatest ally and friend for modern life.
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: Like, but it's something that has to be used daily, like, every day.
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: It's like a muscle.
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly.
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: And so I have so many people that come to me and say, oh, I know you teach about gratitude and meditation.
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: I've been following you for 10 years but it doesn't work for me.
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, ah, share with that, tell me a little bit more about that.
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: And they're usually like, yeah, I went to a retreat or I tried meditation five or six times and I'm like so you know, you're in your thirties or forties or fifties or however old you are, and you're trying to shift these habits that you're doing every single day for decades.
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: Every single solitary day.
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: You have these habits and you think by putting something in four or five times is going to move the needle and shifting our awareness to.
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: I always say to people with this space this is not just introducing practices, this is shifting your entire lifestyle and your mindset.
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: It's like it's not about adding extra things onto your to-do list.
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: This is a way of life for me.
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: I wake up every morning, I write my gratitude journal, I take time and peace and calm to ground and center myself.
• 41:03
  Speaker 1: I did such a blessing to start my day that way, such a blessing to start my day in prayer, and I'm still somebody who wakes up in the morning, jean, and probably the first thought is negative.
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: That's why I created my journal, like still to this day, and I work, I work consistently and hard at this and I don't get annoyed about that anymore, like this morning.
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: I had I had a crazy ass dream last night.
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: That was.
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: I woke up uncomfortable, you know when you have one of those dreams where you wake up and go.
• 41:30
  Speaker 1: Night that was, I woke up uncomfortable.
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: You know when you have one of those dreams where you wake up and go.
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: Oh God, that was not a nice dream.
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: And then the first few thoughts were of panic and stuff I have to do.
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: And I just went and take a deep breath and put your hand in your heart.
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: And so this morning I woke up and actually wrote two or three pages of gratitude because I felt so off.
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: Does that make sense?
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: So it's about getting to know yourself.
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: And I was like I don't think my three things for gratitude are going to cut it today.
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: I've been there.
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: I've been there, but, like you know what, I think you need like at least a page in order to get you out of where you are.
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: But it's recognizing that.
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: You know, we naturally at least I feel we naturally are negative.
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: It's just, and it starts at such a young age that we are drawn to the negative, we're drawn to the fear.
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: For some reason, the fear becomes so big and we're drawn to the fear.
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: We're drawn to the negative and to your point.
• 42:27
  Speaker 2: After you've been doing this for decades, it's like that's your go-to, because that's comfortable.
• 42:32
  Speaker 2: That's what we're used to, is the fear, and the negative and the doubt and the.
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: I'm not good enough or this isn't going to work.
• 42:39
  Speaker 2: That's normal.
• 42:42
  Speaker 1: And I had this amazing teacher who I will never and I've used his phrase in my talks for a decade His name is Rick Hansen, if anyone wants to look him up, and he's fabulous and he totally.
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: He came to Ireland to speak and then I did his course and I was like I love this man.
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: I remember him saying early on in his talk he said our brains are like Velcro for negative experiences and Teflon for positive ones, and there was something about that imagery that I never forgot.
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: I was like, oh my gosh, they are.
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: And I think about it like you know, if you were out and you were having the most amazing day and you met up with a group of girlfriends you haven't seen for years and you were laughing and having so much fun, and then you get back to your car and it's clamped, are you going to tell the next three people about the amazing day you've had with your girlfriends or about your car getting clamped?
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: So now we see why we don't have to work hard at negative experiences staying in our vibrational field.
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: So I would say we don't have to work at it at all, but what we do have to work at is getting into that vibrational frequency of the more positive, gratitude-like feelings, because actually when good things happen, they kind of come and go.
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: We actually don't stay in it for that long.
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: So that's why the practice of gratitude I am such a huge advocate for gratitude, I have been for it.
• 44:10
  Speaker 1: Listen, I was suicidal I when James was a baby not my first time walking that path of thinking of 50,000 ways to check out and you know, planning it meticulously.
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: You know what would be, you know how I was going to do it and I don't say this lightly, by the way, in case anyone's listening like I mean do it.
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: And I don't say this lightly, by the way, in case anyone's listening Like I mean, I struggled so bad with my mental health it was.
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: And when you're like that, you actually just don't want to be here, like like, waking up is like oh gosh, another day, like it's, you know, and going to bed was a relief.
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh gosh, I get a break.
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: I get a break.
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: You know, thank God, let's take a couple of sleeping tablets and just have a break.
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: And I don't have that anymore, thank God.
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: And so, before I even tell the story, I want to anybody who's listening who's like I feel like that there is a way forward, there is a way out.
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: It doesn't have to be that way, I was told it did.
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: It, doesn't?
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: Anybody that tells you that you are going to just be depressed or anxious?
• 45:10
  Speaker 1: Run a million miles from them and find someone who knows what they're freaking doing, you know, and who really, truly understands the potential and power we have in mental health.
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean, when I was young and I was younger I love the way when I was young, I was in my thirties and I was like something in my ego kind of thirties, and I was like something in my ego kind of kicked in there and I was like, well, actually I still think I'm young and I'm 46.
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: And I met this amazing woman and she ran PND, postnatal depression Ireland.
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: Madge Fogarty was her name and I she spent hours on the phone with me, like there are some incredible people in the world, like, when I think back to it now, hours and hours.
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: And she said to me I just want you to write down in the morning three things that you are doing.
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: And I was like, yeah, I like I don't really have anything that I can write.
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: And she's like, okay, how about.
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: I woke up and I was like I'm not so happy.
• 46:09
  Speaker 2: I'm not sure that's a positive.
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: I forget, okay, well what about, like I changed the baby's nappy, or I managed to go for a walk, or I had breakfast, or I changed you know, I changed the baby when the baby woke up.
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: Like we're talking, keeping it real simple here I started doing that every single day and that's why I created my journal.
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: So that was nearly 14 years ago and I have been keeping a gratitude journal every single morning since and people say to me why would you like?
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: You're still doing that?
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh my gosh, if you lived in my head world energy previous to that.
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: The reason I won't let it go is because I'm well aware that our habits define us and our habits create the life we're living, and gratitude has an incredible effect on every aspect of our life.
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: It totally changes how we see the world.
• 47:02
  Speaker 1: When you see the world through the eyes of gratitude, everything shifts and changes.
• 47:05
  Speaker 1: But from a scientific perspective and this is how I explain it to people we have something called the reticular activating system, or the OAS, or the RAS we have all these names for it now.
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: But it's a bundle of nerves at the base of your spine, at the base of your brain, at the top of your spine, and its job is to be the gatekeeper of your mind.
• 47:26
  Speaker 1: So we're exposed to about 40 billion bytes of information per second not per minute per second and your reticular activating system has to decide what information it lets in and what information it keeps out.
• 47:39
  Speaker 1: So it's kind of like an amazing bouncer on the door of a nightclub where there's way too many people outside than the nightclub can hold.
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: So if the nightclub owner comes out and says, okay, well, we have too many men in there, so more women, or we don't want anyone wearing trainers and we don't want anyone in casual clothes, you have to tell your reticular activating system what it is you would like it to focus on and bring in from the world.
• 48:02
  Speaker 1: So my son said last night mom, if there's two women born for every one person that dies, he must've watched something and been getting these statistics.
• 48:14
  Speaker 1: And I was like, okay, and he goes how come I've never seen a pregnant person?
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: Or recently?
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: And I said, well, because your reticular activating system isn't looking for pregnant women.
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: So, and I remember when I was pregnant I was like, oh my God, the entire world is going to be overrun with it Everybody's pregnant?
• 48:30
  Speaker 2: Yes, everybody is pregnant.
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: This is insane.
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: And every ad is pregnant.
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: I was like, god, imagine not being pregnant?
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: Every ad, every commercial on TV, everything in a magazine is for pregnant people.
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: When I go into a supermarket, all I see is baby stuff.
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh wow, they still sell baby stuff in supermarkets.
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: I don't think I've seen it in 13 years.
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: I don't think I've seen it in like 13 years because it's not important to me anymore.
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: And so this is why, when you wake up in the morning and you start worrying and overthinking going through your to-do list, your reticular activating system is like seek out similar experiences in the world.
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: But if you wake up and you sit and you start focusing on gratitude, well then you're saying seek out similar feeling experiences to this.
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: That is the power of gratitude from the scientific perspective of how our brain works, and so it's worth putting the time and investment in.
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: If you're someone that struggles with worry or overwhelm or rumination, and you know time is against you, you know, because that's also energy, time is against you.
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: You know that's because that's also energy.
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: When we feel like time is against us, you know our energy is very tight and wound up, and when we're tight and wound up.
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: We're not open to receive new experiences and connections, and so that's why relaxation is the foundation of energy management and it's the most important part of energy work.
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: Like, I work with CEOs where I'm like I want you to relax for 20 minutes a day and it's the most important part of energy work.
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: Like I work with CEOs where I'm like I want you to relax for 20 minutes a day and they're like excuse me, I'm paying you so you can tell me to relax for 20 minutes.
• 50:00
  Speaker 2: I'm listening to you and I'm like I need a vacation.
• 50:02
  Speaker 2: Wow, all right, bring on some relaxation.
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: I have never had a client come back and say, well, that didn't work.
• 50:10
  Speaker 1: Who does it Like?
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: If you actually take time for yourself every day and you relax, you know you can do a relaxation meditation, you can just sit still, you can go out into nature, consciously relaxing.
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: What you're doing is you're waking up your inner energetic.
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: So most people are resourced externally.
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: So let me explain what I mean by this.
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: So if you didn't go to the gym and use your muscles, they become lazy, right, they're not going to be toned, you know.
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: And then you go back to the gym and the next day you can't move because you suddenly woke up these muscles that you're like oh sure I didn't even know I had muscles there.
• 50:48
  Speaker 1: I can't move, I can't walk.
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: It's actually the same for our energetic system.
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: So our inner energetics get lazy when we're being resourced with sugar and caffeine and blue light and codependency or anything else that people use.
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: So we're stimulated, being resourced outside all the time.
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: Like I have to.
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: I have to have a cup of coffee.
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: Enjoying a cup of coffee is different too.
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: I cannot get started in the morning without my coffee.
• 51:15
  Speaker 1: That means you're being resourced externally.
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: Now, there's nothing wrong with having coffee, there's nothing wrong with any of that, because I don't believe everything's for everyone.
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: Like people say, oh, coffee is bad, well, maybe it's bad for Mary, but it might not be bad for Julie, right?
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: Like we have to stop with these blanket statements because it's not good.
• 51:30
  Speaker 1: And so when we start to resource ourself energetically from the inside and I love that your podcast you're talking about it is an inside out world everything changes, but there is a transitional period.
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: We have to keep working on resourcing ourself internally.
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: You know, we have to spend time in space and stillness.
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: We have to check in with ourself.
• 51:50
  Speaker 1: We have to spend time in space and stillness.
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: We have to check in with ourself like listen to our body.
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: What is it that I need in this moment?
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: But it is the most worthwhile work you will ever do, right?
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: Because we're energetic beings and what happens when we're being resourced externally is that we're going to need more of the substance or stuff or thing to resource us, and eventually we get sick.
• 52:10
  Speaker 2: Right, yeah, eventually.
• 52:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, eventually, we do.
• 52:12
  Speaker 2: It's like the bank account that you were talking about in the beginning.
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so before we run out of time, talk to me about how do your clients find you and what are the most common ways that people work with you.
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: So obviously through talks.
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: My website is alisoncannabincom and I do one-to-one coaching, I teach a program called Dream Building and I do mentoring, and then I have a membership, a monthly membership, where I do deep, transformational breathwork meditation.
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: I have guest teachers on everything.
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: This month we have finance, you know, stock market investing for women.
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: Next month we have building biology and EMF.
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: So everything to do with energy Money is energy.
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: The environment you live in is energy.
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: So everything to do with energy, money is energy.
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: The environment you live in is energy, and so I have over 55 hours of content in there and it's only $33 a month.
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: And then you get access to me for eight live classes a month, which is awesome.
• 53:01
  Speaker 2: That is cool, that is great.
• 53:03
  Speaker 2: All right, so I have two more questions.
• 53:04
  Speaker 2: One is how do you transfer this way of living and this way of thinking and breathing and being to your son?
• 53:14
  Speaker 1: I've done what probably every other parent has probably done in my parenting journey is tell them what I want them to do and then get really disappointed when they don't do it.
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: It's like eat this, do this.
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: And you know my Buddhist teacher, who's not with us anymore, sakyam Rinpoche.
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: He wrote the Tibetan book Living and Dying, which was a really important book for me when my father passed, when I was 21.
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: And then that man became my spiritual mentor for many, many, many years, which was another.
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: I called them God winks.
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: You know moments when people cross your path and he just used to say to me if you embody these teachings and you truly live them, you don't need to say anything because you know people.
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: Actually, 70% of our communication is energy and so if we're saying one thing, we're doing another.
• 53:59
  Speaker 1: Kids know that, right, they do Like.
• 54:02
  Speaker 1: My son will call me out.
• 54:04
  Speaker 1: I'm saying get off your phone or stop on the iPad.
• 54:07
  Speaker 1: And he's like mom, you're constantly on your phone, right?
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: So that's a moment for me to become aware and go okay, so I need to model putting down my phone at 6 PM in the evening and you know, when he says something, I'm like yeah, you're right actually, and owning my stuff.
• 54:21
  Speaker 1: So I'm doing my best and I think, when it comes to parenting, we're all learning as we go there ain't no textbook that comes with having a kid and I'm doing my best to live into the principles that I want him to learn from, to truly embody them and become them, you know, so that he sees me living everything that I speak about at best I can as I move through my life and that includes mostly for me, like how I treat others at the side of the soccer pitch, you know, when you see parents losing it, like it kind of moves into everything.
• 54:59
  Speaker 1: You know, am I, when something happens with him, am I answering from my pain, body and from my own trauma, wounds and my own fear, or am I able to really sit and listen and provide space for him?
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: So yeah, it's definitely not easy, but I definitely think that that phrase be the change you want to see in the world is the most powerful thing we can all do.
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: Sure.
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: Well, it makes you really think about how you're behaving and how you're acting.
• 55:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and to your point, it's hard being a parent.
• 55:28
  Speaker 2: You know they push buttons and it is challenging.
• 55:31
  Speaker 2: So you know nobody's perfect at it.
• 55:34
  Speaker 2: So I think a reminder that you're not perfect.
• 55:36
  Speaker 2: Just keep trying.
• 55:37
  Speaker 2: That's a good one too, yeah, just keep showing up Right, exactly, I love it.
• 55:43
  Speaker 2: Ok, so before I let you go because I've taken so much of your time, this has been so amazing.
• 55:47
  Speaker 2: I could talk to you for hours.
• 55:53
  Speaker 2: I always ask my guests to recommend a book that has impacted their lives, either personally, from a wellness perspective, or from a career perspective, or in any way that they feel is impactful that they would recommend our listeners read.
• 56:00
  Speaker 2: So do you have a book that you could suggest?
• 56:02
  Speaker 1: I could suggest 500.
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: There's always like six books at the side of my.
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: James is like you're really reading six books at the same time.
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: I'm like actually I am, yes, you know, picking up different chapters every day, but one of the books I picked up very early on, probably in my early twenties, was a book called the Game of Life and how to Play it by a woman called Florence Scovel Shin.
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: And Florence Scovel Shin was a mystic in the twenties and she's probably still, in my humble opinion, the greatest mystic.
• 56:28
  Speaker 1: And the book is this thin.
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: It's so thin You'll get it on Amazon, guys, for like six bucks.
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: It's really inexpensive.
• 56:40
  Speaker 1: She has other amazing works and I keep going back to her books because she makes this work so accessible.
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: She talks about the law of the universe and she talks about the law of one which is really love and reconnecting and remembering that we are divine beings of love, and so when we stray off that path, I mean you know the one, I have a posted on my mirror and it's like love the Lord, your God, with all your heart and love your neighbor as yourself.
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: And that is well, in my humble opinion.
• 57:08
  Speaker 1: Jesus came to teach us.
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: I know that there's lots of different religious interpretations of his teachings and that can be indoctrinated with fear, but for me that is so simple but also the most challenging thing to do, like love your neighbor as yourself.
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: That means seeing the divine in every single human being you meet and I think that's our daily work because we're in this time of division.
• 57:34
  Speaker 1: You know, as soon as you step outside your front door, you're being pulled out of yourself.
• 57:40
  Speaker 1: You know it's us and them.
• 57:42
  Speaker 1: And you know I always find I went to brunch with a beautiful group of women yesterday and we were talking and there was people from all different backgrounds and different political ideologies.
• 57:53
  Speaker 1: And there's one of my friends, brandy Jo, and she just has this very unique way of bringing the people in the middle together and she said you know, when we actually have conversations, real honest conversations, we all have far more in common and we want most of the same things.
• 58:12
  Speaker 1: You know, people want to feel loved, seen, connected.
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: We want community and we want to help each other.
• 58:19
  Speaker 1: Like there's really not that much.
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: So when we're, when we're in this stage of like being so divisive and judgmental, remember that if, when you, when you peel back the layers, they probably want the same stuff as you, underneath it all.
• 58:33
  Speaker 2: Right, yeah, yeah, they do.
• 58:35
  Speaker 2: We're all very similar.
• 58:36
  Speaker 2: Oh, those are powerful.
• 58:38
  Speaker 2: Where can people find your journal?
• 58:40
  Speaker 2: Also, I'll link all this in the show notes too.
• 58:42
  Speaker 1: Yes, so on my website, alisoncanavancom, you can go into the journal and you can download it for free actually and just print it off and start using it every day.
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: Or I sell it on Amazon as well it for free actually, and just print it off and start using it every day, or I sell it on Amazon as well.
• 58:53
  Speaker 2: Okay, perfect, I will link that, because I'm a huge proponent of journaling.
• 58:56
  Speaker 2: I think it's so important and, like you, I think journaling and gratitude every morning is so important to setting your intentions of how you start your day, and I'm a huge proponent of a lot of the things that you talk about.
• 59:07
  Speaker 2: So I thank you so much for being on the show.
• 59:10
  Speaker 2: I could have you back.
• 59:11
  Speaker 2: We could talk for an hour about asking hard questions and how do you really get to your true, authentic self through those hard questions?
• 59:19
  Speaker 2: There's so much you do, so much fabulous work coaching so I really encourage everybody go follow you on Instagram, sign up for your programs and someday I will definitely have you back if you're willing to come back and talk about some of the other things, because there's so much to learn and you're such a valuable resource and your energy is amazing and what a wonderful way to start my Monday.
• 59:38
  Speaker 2: So thank you so much, allie, for being on the show.
• 59:40
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God, it's been such a pleasure.
• 59:42
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for having me.
• 59:44
  Speaker 2: It's been great.
• 59:44
  Speaker 2: We'll talk soon.
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: Bye everybody.
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: Thank you for joining us for another episode of the House of Jermar podcast, where wellness starts within.
• 59:54
  Speaker 2: We appreciate you being a part of our community and hope you felt inspired and motivated by our guest.
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 2: If you enjoyed this episode, please write us a review and share it with friends.
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 2: Building our reach on YouTube and Apple podcasts will help us get closer to our mission to empower 1 million women to live all in.
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 2: You can also follow us on Instagram at House of Jermar and sign up to be a part of our monthly inspiration newsletter through our website, houseofjermarcom.
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 2: If you or someone you know would be a good guest on the show, please reach out to us at podcast at houseofgermarcom.
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 2: This has been a House of Germar production with your host, Jean Collins.
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 2: Thank you for joining our house.