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FUTURE YOU · The Karen Kenney Show

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  Hey, welcome to the Karen Kenney show. I'm super duper excited to
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  be here with you today, and we're just gonna dive right into
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  this sucker so I'm calling this episode future you. Future you
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  like your future self. We're gonna this is like a little love
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  letter. We're like, setting your future self up for something
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  better, something good, something extra nice, you know
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  what I mean? Okay, so every once in a while, right? Every once in
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  a while, I will jokingly say, Today me, today me would like a
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  logic complaint with like yesterday me especially,
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  especially after I've done like leg day, like lifting heavy on
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  legs, or, you know, ran extra fat or did much stuff, and then
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  my physical body is paying for the choices of yesterday me. So
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  sometimes I'll say, Hey, today me wants to file a complaint
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  with yesterday me. And then also, sometimes I will say
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  things like, Hey, today me wants to thank younger me for being so
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  fucking resilient. Or today me wants to thank younger me for,
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  like, really sticking it out, or taking that program or making
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  that decision, or, like, you know, getting that training, or
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  starting yoga or stopping smoking, or, like, whatever the
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  thing is, like, it's really nice sometimes to look back and
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  appreciate the younger versions of yourself, and we talk about
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  that a lot on this show. But today I want to talk about your
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  future self, this future version of you, the you that is yet to
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  happen, right? The you that is coming on down the pike. And the
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  thing is, is that, and this is going to be a very simple
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  episode, it's just a couple of questions I want us to ponder.
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  And it's this, here's the question, is, what you are doing
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  and choosing right now, is it gonna be something that future
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  you is gonna want to thank you for
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  the people and the things that you are doing right now, that
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  You are hanging out with, spending time with, in
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  relationship with, is the job that you're doing right now, is
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  that piece of cake that you're about to put in your mouth right
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  now? Like, whatever the thing is, because, you know, sometimes
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  today us is writing checks that future us, like, it's like,
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  like, can't cash. It's like, is your ass right now writing
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  checks at future you can't cash that. They're gonna have to pay
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  the consequences of you being yourself right now. And I think
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  it can be really, really helpful to, like, reverse engineer this,
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  because you know how in like, 12 step programs or recovery
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  programs, they'll say, you can't build a better past, right? And
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  that's just facts. It's like, what happened has happened. And
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  of course, in miracles, we say something kind of same z's. We
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  say same z is different, right? We say that the past is gone. It
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  can touch me, not. The past is not here. It can touch me, not.
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  So what's happened has happened. There's no going back. I always
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  say healing doesn't happen in the past. It happens. It happens
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  here, right? It can happen here. It can happen with future
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  versions of ourselves, but there's no going back in making
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  that show or whatever happened, that trauma, that drama, that
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  whatever better it is, what it is, but what we choose to do
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  right now can benefit us. It can benefit now us, but it can
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  certainly benefit future us. So to kind of reverse engineer it,
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  what I'll do sometimes, especially when I'm feeling
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  resistance, especially when I'm getting a little whiny, or a
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  little like, man, don't feel like it, I'll ask myself, is
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  future me going to be grateful that I did this thing right now
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  or today, right is it? Am I going to see the choice that I'm
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  making right now through a lens of gratitude? Is it going to
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  feel like a gift? Am I going to be really grateful that I did
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  this thing and I look at future me, and I say, okay, future me
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  is this. I'll just give an example. I'd be like, okay,
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  future me this dream that I have of my future self, that I'm
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  going to be like a published author, a successful author,
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  right? New York Times, best selling whatever, okay, just a
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  little dream or whatever. And then I'm like, Well, I have to
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  ask myself if that is my goal, and your goal could be anything
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  like, hey, I want to put more muscle on my body, or I want to
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  be somebody who commits to going to the gym or learning to play
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  an instrument, or, like, whatever the thing is, whatever.
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  Future self that you envision, that you dream of, that you
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  want, and then you reverse engineer it, and you say, Okay,
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  well, what, what does right now me have to do in order for that
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  version of me, of my future self, of my future, you, your
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  future, you, you know, what are some of the choices and habits
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  that they need to be committing to, like right now. And is this
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  thing you know, here's here's another question you can ask
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  yourself, are the choices and the decisions and the
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  investments of time, energy, money, whatever attention right
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  are the commitments and the relationships and the sacrifices
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  that you're making today, are they going to benefit future you
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  now? You probably can't justify, like, oh yeah. Like, me getting
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  shit faced on I don't drink, but like, you know what I mean? Like
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  getting shit faced at one o'clock every night. I don't
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  think future you is going to benefit from that. You know, not
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  getting enough rest day after day, night after night after
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  night after night. I don't think future you is probably going to
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  benefit from that, right? Etc, etc. Go down the line and rather
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  than sitting in it and beating ourselves up and feeling like,
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  Oh my God, I've already blown it. I'm like, No, you can pump
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  the brakes right now. You can stop right now and make a
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  different choice right now, like you right now, could be making
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  some really fantastic new decisions, habits, whatever,
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  right that are going to benefit future you, and we have to think
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  about getting in alignment. Remember, the assignment is
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  alignment. Is there a congruency between what I say, that I want,
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  what I who I say I want to be like, how I want to be showing
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  up in the world, with the choices and the decisions that
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  I'm making right now? Because it's really easy to keep putting
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  things off, to keep saying, Oh, I'll do it tomorrow, or Oh,
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  blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, but you want to live not based
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  on, you know who you were, because that's not going to be
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  super duper helpful, not just who you are, right now, if we
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  can be visual, like, visualize future you I mean, don't do this
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  if you're Driving right? But like, if you're at home in a
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  safe place, can even, like, after you hear the instructions,
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  it's like, hit pause, right? But just close your eyes and see in
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  your mind's eye, imagine there's a big movie screen, right? And
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  if you can't visualize, you can imagine, we all have
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  imaginations. You can be creative. If you're more
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  analytical, maybe you do it on a piece of paper or whatever the
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  thing is, right? But imagine, or visualize, pretend, in your
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  mind, there's a movie screen, and on that movie screen, you
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  see this future you that you have dreamed about, that you
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  envision, that you want to be like, right? And whether that's
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  successful, or you're a mom, or you're you have a beautiful
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  partner, or you now have a dog, or like I wanna, like I said I
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  wanna lose weight, gain weight, get stronger, write a book,
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  learn an instrument, start a business, whatever the thing is,
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  and try to envision that. You try to see them, see where they
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  are, see what they're wearing, right? Try to put yourself like,
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  imagine. What are they hearing? What are they thinking? What are
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  the kind of things that they're doing? Who are they hanging out
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  with? Are they reading books? Are they taking classes like,
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  what? Try to really envision this person and then reverse
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  engineer it and say, what are some of the things that I would
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  need to do now. Is there a particular skill set I would
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  need to learn? Are there some relationships and connections I
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  would need to make? Are there some habits I would start to
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  have to, like, build, you know, are there some things that I
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  would need to do now to benefit future me? Right? Because if we
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  what's the old saying, If you keep doing what you've always
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  done right, you're going to keep getting what you always got. And
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  if we want to have a different experience in the future, then
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  we've got to cut the shit right now. Like now is the time. Like
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  now is the time. And even if you've blown it in the past,
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  present, you right now, you can still get it right for future
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  you. So we don't have to just throw up our hands and say, Oh
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  my God, I've blown it, and poor me and I can't do it. It's like
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  no some future version of you will benefit from what in who
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  you are being right now, the choices that you make, the
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  commitments that you make, the relationships that you build
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  right, the trust that you build, whatever the thing is, the
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  habits and the patterns that new neural network in your brain by
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  choosing differently, choosing new, okay, it's very, very
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  powerful, and so often, you know, I'm. All for being in the
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  present moment, right? Because the past is what it is. There's
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  no changing it. The future is what it is. But here's the
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  thing, we can make choices now that can affect and inform and
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  influence and inspire the future. We can't go back and
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  build something different. But you right now, you do have
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  autonomy and agency and authorship about some of the
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  things that can go down. Now, I know we can't control everything
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  that happens in the world, but at least we can set our
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  attention on what we want. We can set our intention on what we
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  want. And so sometimes we got to look forward and we say, okay, I
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  envision this now. What are some of the things the small what's
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  the next smallest right step that you can make today that is
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  going to move you in the direction of that version of
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  future you and so often we just get so overwhelmed, but
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  surviving like right now, and that's why I said the next
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  smallest, tiniest, like right step that you can move in the
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  direction of that. What's something that your future self
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  is going to be grateful for that you today did. And if I'm
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  somebody who wants to have a book, that means I have to sit
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  down and write, right? I gotta sit my ass in the chair, as
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  Steven Pressfield says, Put your ass where your hat wants to be.
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  Put your ass where your hat wants to be. Do I have that book
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  right next to me? Do I have it right here? Do I have it? Oh,
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  nope, but it's right there. I can see it over there. All
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  right, put your ass where your heart wants to be
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  so that means you gotta do right now, get your butt in the chair,
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  or get your butt to the gym, or get your butt signed up for like
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  a mentor, or hire a coach, or do the things now that are going to
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  benefit. I mean, right now, you will also benefit from many of
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  these things, but it might take a little time, but we don't want
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  to have future. You, you know, being like, kind of bummed at
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  today. You know what I'm saying? It's like, uh, and if you've
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  ever uttered this, oh, my god. Why did I do that? What was I
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  thinking? What I often say to people is you weren't thinking.
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  You weren't thinking at all. You were not thinking. You were not
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  in your right mind. You were not having a conversation with the
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  smarty pants part of yourself, right? And whether you call that
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  spirit Holy Spirit, internal teacher, your intuition, your
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  instinct, you were not listening to that. You were listening to
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  the fucking chatter of the ego mind that wants what it wants
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  when it wants it, and it just wants it now because it deserves
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  it, and it's got reasons and it's got excuses, right? No, no,
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  we gotta listen to that other pot. And sometimes we can't hear
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  that voice of the other pot, of the pot of the internal teacher,
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  because in miracles, they call it like the raucous, like the
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  screams. It is like the the obnoxious screams of the ego,
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  right? That's my word. It's like the shrieks. They call it the
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  shrieks. The shrieking of the ego is so loud. So we need some
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  we need some tools, man, we need some DSP. We need a daily
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  spiritual practice. It's going to help dial down the volume of
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  that insistent, whiny, critical pain in the ass, that little
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  bastard of an ego, so we can hear the voice for love, so we
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  can hear that voice that is actually, you know, rooting for
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  us and sees who we really are and wants us to succeed. So
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  don't have today you be writing checks that future you you like
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  the you know can't cash like let's really take a gander. Take
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  a little look, see. And then the assignment is alignment. Can I
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  get in congruence with what I say I want? Is it matching what
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  I'm actually choosing to do right now. And sometimes the
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  things that we want, they do require you. I you know, and
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  sacrifice is a funny word. It's like so you might be what
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  sacrificing, going out and having a good time and drinking
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  or doing whatever, because you got to stay home and focus on,
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  you know, your business or your book or your project, or the
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  skill set that you're learning, or whatever it is that to me, is
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  it like a fair trade? Is it a sacrifice? I don't know, you're
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  getting something else instead of the The Hangover, or you're
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  getting this instead of spending all that money or whatever,
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  right? And this can show up, like, across the board, like,
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  let's say with credit cards, right? Here's an example. It's
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  wicked easy to just go make a purchase that you can't really
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  afford on plastic, on credit, because the pain isn't there,
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  right? The pain isn't there. You just think, like, oh, yeah, I'm
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  gonna do it. And you get that dopamine hitter. You get that
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  rush of excitement, that momentary, like, chemical
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  cocktail releases in your. Body, and you get so excited, but
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  you're not thinking about the bill that's coming 30 days from
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  now. You're not thinking about all the work that future you,
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  right and and it's really easy, because with credit cards, it
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  doesn't feel real, but future you is going to have to pay for
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  the patterns and the habits and the choices of you right now,
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  and it's like, oh, is this thing I'm about to do right now? Is it
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  truly going to benefit me? Am I going to be happy that this is
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  the choice that I made? You know what I mean? So we gotta get
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  real with ourselves. We gotta make things a little more real.
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  And we also have to understand we only have so much time on
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  this planet. We don't know when the last exhale is coming. So
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  why make it harder for future you you know it's like you're
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  about to like, like, I said, maybe it's like, and bodily
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  things are just easy if you're not getting enough rest, if
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  you're not putting good, nutritious food in your body, if
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  you're not moving your body, if you're not exercising or doing
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  things that benefit your heart, right? That benefit your brain,
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  that benefit your organs, your muscles, whatever it's like. We
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  have to ask myself, is the toll that I'm paying, right? Is that
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  toll that's coming up, down the line? You know when you're
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  driving on 93 right? You're driving on 93 north or south,
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  that toll booth. You know that toll booth is coming, and at
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  some point, if you're trying to get where you gotta go, you're
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  gonna have to pay a toll. I'd rather pay the toll now, so it's
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  easier later. Do you know what I'm saying? Like, future I want
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  to I want to help future me. I want to help the future you as
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  well. And that's what we got to be thinking about sometimes.
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  Okay? And look, I can give you 1000 other examples, but so
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  think about who is it that you want to be? How do you want to
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  be in the world? What is it that you want for yourself and your
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  family, or whatever? And then say, is this thing that I'm
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  about to do right now? Is future me going to be happy for it,
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  grateful for it? Is it going to say, like, oh, yeah, like that.
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  That was a good choice. And I know sometimes we can only make
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  decisions based on the amount of information that we have right
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  now. And I also believe that we can learn from anything, so even
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  the mistakes that we've made, we can, we can. We can gather
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  something from that. We can look at that and say, like, Ooh, I'll
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  never fucking knew that again, right? So even that is valuable,
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  but why not set ourselves up for success by just thinking a
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  little bit ahead, like, you know, imagining it, and then
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  saying, like, Okay, I'm going to take steps today that are going
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  to better my life moving forward. You know, is it my? Is
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  my future? Me going to love me for these decisions that I'm
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  making right now? And hopefully that's helpful in some way for
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  you. Hopefully it gives you, you know, a chance to just kind of
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  slow down and ask yourself, like, yeah, is who I'm being in
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  alignment with this idea, that I have this vision, that I have
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  this, you know, dream, that I have these goals that I have,
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  and if they're not, then we get some work to do. And sometimes,
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  you know, we just get really stuck in behaviors and patterns
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  because they're familiar and they feel safe, even if they're
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  not very helpful. And there's all kinds of pattern interrupts.
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  There's all kinds of ways to help you to build new new
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  habits, new ways of thinking, new ways of being right, and to
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  make different choices. And sometimes we'll be like, you
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  know, I sometimes will say to people, look your best thinking
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  is what got you here. Look your your best thinking got you here
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  so far. So if you're not quite sure what your next steps are
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  like, Thank God. Thank God for books. Thank God for podcasts,
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  thank God for coaches and mentors and people that you can
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  hire to help you along the way. Because while nobody can do the
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  work for you, you absolutely, in this day and age, do not have to
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  do it alone. You don't have to do it alone. That's the whole
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  one of the whole hot beats of my business is, look, this whole
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  being human thing is not easy, navigating this and trying to,
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  you know, navigate the world with more happiness and joy and
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  love and clarity and confidence, all those things, right?
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  Creativity, it's not always easy, but good news is you don't
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  have to do it alone. So I hope future you is being set up
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  marvelously, fabulously, brilliantly by today you and you
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  know, just make sure your ass is not writing checks at future you
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  get cash, okay, all right, wherever you are in the world,
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  okay, wherever you go in the world, may you leave yourself
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  and others and the animals and the planet and the environment,
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  and may you leave fear? Future you better than how you found it
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  right now, wherever you go, may you and your energy and your
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  presence and your intention and attention and your love be a
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  blessing. Bye, you.