Latest / Because Fuck You That's Why Podcast / Show #196 Mini Ep #1

Transcript

Show #196 Mini Ep #1 · Because Fuck You That's Why Podcast

0:00
Because fuck you. That's why it is a founding member of the Odd Pods
0:03
Media Network. Hello, and welcome to episode number one ninety six. It's
0:43
gonna be our first mini episode, a deliberately shorter episode, just to give
0:49
us time to prepare for episode two hundreds. Yeah, I don't tell them.
0:53
We're just lazy, don't feel like doing a fall show. Yeah,
0:55
episode one ninety six, So we're just feeling lazy. We're just we're just
0:58
gonna do like it's gonna be a gonna We're gonna do two instead of three
1:03
games. If either team wins both games, then they win the entire episode.
1:07
Otherwise, if each team win one game piece, it'll just be a
1:11
draw and no harm, no foul. But they're gonna be the traditional,
1:15
silly, fun usual, pop culture or news inspired games as before, all
1:21
the same funniness, just a little bit shorter. That's all cool, that's
1:25
all. And to celebrate this weird new format, we have brought the best
1:30
guests we could possibly manage, which is quite a coupe for us. We
1:34
have defined monkey Improv in the house. Andy and Karen, welcome back.
1:45
Thanks having it's been since we've had you in the studio. How are you?
1:49
We missed you. I like to say the same. We understand.
1:56
I think we're doing great. How are you? Feels oddly warm inside that
2:00
he almost wants to thanks so much. And playing playing a rare third person
2:08
on the same team is going to be Kyla, Hi, Kyla Hi.
2:13
I love being a third wheel. Should be lots of fun. It's going
2:16
to be the three of you against our usual Star Wars heroes over here.
2:23
We'll get to them in a moment. Kyla, how are you doing?
2:27
Welcome back? Thanks for coming again for like the sixth episode in a row.
2:30
Hey, no problem, limited brain function and capacity today, so you
2:35
know great. If the other team, yeah, so I could be a
2:39
floater. She may actually bring their team down. We'll see. And on
2:46
the other side are usual idiots. He's a gamer and a storyteller and he
2:52
used to be my youngest friend. It's a hello still all right, I'm
3:01
gonna keep doing it, so yeah, enjoy that. Uh and Stevie of
3:12
course our resident veteran podcaster and veteran podcaster or Halloween, so I'll do a
3:15
blogger buddy, happy weekend? All right? And as per usual, I
3:21
like to ask everybody a question as an introduction and for something like this,
3:25
Uh, the most perfect question I can come up with is what is too
3:30
long and you wish was shortened? We'll start with Andy, what is too
3:32
long and you wish was shortened? Any of the seasons of the new Star
3:38
Trek shows? Okay, they just go on too long? Yeah, no,
3:45
one episode is too long? Okay, fair enough? Karen? What
3:52
about you? What do you think is too long and needs to be shortened?
3:58
We have and we haven't even still be impressive. Besides that, we
4:08
haven't even hit winter yet, and I'll just say winter. We're not even
4:11
there, and I'm already thinking like February and how long the shortest month is.
4:17
Yeah, March always fakes me out, and then I get real disappointed.
4:23
Yeah y global warming? Yeah, come on one A super winter fan
4:28
myself, so I one hundred percent agree, Kyla? What about you?
4:30
What do you think is too long and needs to be shortened? I could
4:33
shorten this myself, but it is the list of things I need to do
4:36
to prepare for the insane holidays coming up? Oh god, yeah, oh
4:42
god, yes, my to do list needs to be shortened. Do I
4:45
an order of magnitude? Okay, what about you? What do you think
4:48
is too long and needs to be shortened? His podcast? That's what we're
4:54
doing. That's what we're doing. What this episode is? How? How
5:00
is it every time I ask you an introductory question you missed the point so
5:03
hard you slam into a brick wall. Can we just change this to a
5:06
one true false question? Yeah? All right, move on to Stevie.
5:11
Stevie, what do you think is too long and needs to be shortened?
5:14
The last time I answered this question, I got in trouble for sexual harassment,
5:16
so I have to change my answer now. I'm probably gonna say the
5:21
amount of just random crap I have, like just sitting around. I have
5:27
just too much of it and it needs to go away. And I am
5:30
not that you need a clutter ectomy. Yes, oh yes, that's oh
5:38
clutters too long? Yes, yes, I'm going to speak to your hr
5:45
rap about sexual harassments. Anyway, let's get into the game, shall we.
5:54
Game one is going to be have. I got good news for you.
5:56
I've got three news stories, and all our players have to do is
5:59
tell me which of these stories I have pre selected as the best news.
6:01
Whichever team picks the best or second best. If no one picks the best,
6:05
we'll win the game and earn one episode point. We're going to go
6:08
over each story first, and then we'll have the teams decide which one they
6:12
would like to choose as the best. For story number one, woman sings
6:16
gospel songs and peace herself after wild police chase in Florida, Keys. Surprisingly,
6:24
this did not start with Florida woman, which I feel would have been
6:28
appropriate, but I don't think she was from Florida screen break. I am
6:31
not sure. I don't remember if the top of my head, but she
6:34
was observed in a gray Chevy suburban speeding while going north in the southbound lanes.
6:42
The problem number one troopers pursued her with the lights and sirens on,
6:46
and she ignored them. They tracked her between ninety and one hundred and twenty
6:50
miles per hour as she traveled across seven Mile Bridge and in Marathon, and
6:56
she maintained that speed regardless of oncoming traffic. Oh damn. So they tried
7:03
to stop her twice with spike strips. She dodged the first one, but
7:06
not the second. I mean, I think I would lose my quote unquote
7:12
composure if I ran over spike strips and didn't actually get stopped my containment.
7:19
When she eventually crashed into a construction site. She had extremely constricted pupils and
7:26
did not respond to verbal or physical stimulation and just stared straightforward in silence.
7:33
They were not physically stimulating her the right way. Oh, they got nothing
7:39
on the field, sobriety test, So it was an alcohol whatever it was.
7:45
But she said God the Father told her to stop, and she was
7:47
taken to jail without any further incidents. Was God the Father the name of
7:53
the construction site? But while getting checked out at the hospital, troopers said
7:59
she urinate down herself in the lobby while loudly singing gospel song and that she
8:05
would alternate between sleeping, singing, and talking to herself while being treated typical.
8:13
That was my senior year in college. That was spring. No,
8:18
I was in an English composition class. Oh, yes, that's very apropos
8:26
any thoughts at all? What was she singing gospel songs? Yeah? Yeah,
8:35
tell me who's that wiz and lady, it's me. She wasn't trying
8:43
to like baptize people with her p right, I'm pretty sure. No,
8:48
I'm sure you sanctified that I've been. I don't know. Florida is as
8:56
Florida does. Yeah, they bring out the crazy. Even it's a very
9:01
Florida story. Let's move to a completely different part of the world. Story
9:05
Number two Vietnamese man's five month long headache caused by chopsticks in his Brainy.
9:15
So, this man felt a headache coming on and tried to just get through
9:22
it, and apparently tried to just get through it for five whole months.
9:26
Now. I don't know about you, but if I have a headache,
9:28
I do something about it, right In any event, it wasn't until he
9:35
felt a strange object in his nose that he decided to go seek treatment from
9:41
this and that's when they discovered he had a full set of chopsticks shoved into
9:46
his into his nose, and it was apparently poking his brain trying to get
9:52
the dumpling out. I mean, I've been tired when I've been eating and
9:58
I'm almost falling into my dish. Is that what happened? He was getting
10:01
ready to eat or something had his chopsticks out and just like right down into
10:03
him. That's what I always wondering. Do you not know what's happening.
10:09
I mean, I've heard of getting drunk and forgetting what happened, but this
10:13
is like a whole new level, Like you got stabbed in the face,
10:18
better than that, you got stabbed in the nose. I'm thinking it was
10:20
a sushi bar fight. I see. I thought it was like sabotage.
10:24
I thought it was like a spouse or something like that. Maybe you sabotage
10:28
someone with chopsticks. He's such a heavy sleeper. Let's see how far we
10:31
can get this same and they got one in and they were just like you
10:37
would dry it again, you know, marking it can go this, go
10:41
this far. Oh my god. The other one he remembered an altercation at
10:46
a bar. There was there was a fight at the table, and he
10:52
was stabbed in the face by something and was taken the first aid. But
10:56
after that he only felt headaches, tightness, and the occasional puss. Oh
11:03
god, who hasn't Yeah, yeah, yeah, that is one of the
11:09
worst phrases I've ever heard. The occasional puffs. Band alcohol is an interesting
11:18
thing. My mom was a nurse for about one hundred and fifty years,
11:20
and when she was in the er multiple times she heard about people with knives
11:28
in their heads and not realizing it because they had been drunk the night before,
11:31
woke up with a terrible headache. Knife, don't have a mirror full
11:39
knife, complete lack of self awareness. Wow, just going on? Which
11:46
one of these you like? Yes? Which one of these that I like?
11:48
One with or plus loves words the third one. Yeah, let's move
11:54
on to story number three and see what this one. This one's about Puss
12:00
house cats, that's his favorite house cats mistaken for cougar's cause havoc and Oregon
12:07
and Washington they were trying to pick up young men. This is kind of
12:11
this is kind of two separate stories, but uh, they happened almost at
12:15
the same time. A cougar was spotted at Cook Park in Tiggered, Oregon.
12:22
T I. G. A R d is the name of the city.
12:26
Yeah, uh and uh. After some some warnings and and and you
12:31
know, people being encouraged to stay in their homes, turns out it was
12:37
a house cat, like a coon or something. The same thing would go
12:43
on to happen in Washington when a cougar was spotted uh near a school Graff
12:50
Elementary School to be exact, in the small town of Moses Lake, Washington
12:54
turned out to be Kim Catron and reported a mountain lion sighting near school grounds,
13:01
and of course everybody freaked the fuck out. Uh these school was evacuated
13:09
and everything was placed under lockdown, and of course, once again turned out
13:13
just a housecat. So can I just say, please do not buy your
13:18
housecats on wish dot com for the love of God. And what are you
13:26
feeding these animals that they are large enough to be mistaken for cougars? They
13:30
were distant. The video for one of these, I can't remember which one
13:39
is hilarious because the the news anchor is standing right outside with it with the
13:45
microphone and he points and then the camera shifts over to where he's pointing at.
13:50
It's just a house, just a cat sitting there, just staring blindly
13:54
into the camera, just kind of do you know, it's fully obviously cat
14:00
like, there's no way you could mistake this for a cougar. And I'm
14:03
just watching this video going, oh my god, what is wrong with people?
14:07
Society is fucked? All right? They thought there was a cougar and
14:18
they evacuated the school and figure you keep them inside may have gotten the tins
14:24
of events, there was a lockdown, I know that much. Girls,
14:35
All right, well that's all three stories. A woman saying gospel songs and
14:39
peace yourself after wild police chase, Vietnamese man has a five month long headache
14:45
because of chopsticks in his brain, and house cats. It's taken for cougar's
14:48
cause havoc in Oregon and Washington, respectively. Which one of these did I
14:52
select to be the best news of the week? And Andy, Karen and
14:56
Kyla you're our guests, so you will go first. P plus or plus?
15:03
I'm guessing it's the cat. Nobody's yeah, yeah, I mean seriously,
15:09
an you love hoaxes. I'm hoping it's the cat because otherwise Aaron Jesus
15:20
I love. The attempt to guilty into changing my never works, but it's
15:24
always serious. The guy was using plus out of space, and the other
15:28
lady was clearly just an alcoholic or something, and we're having at event.
15:33
Yeah, she should be pitied, So it's got to be the cat.
15:37
All does the team agree with this? The psychology will be showing answer.
15:43
If you're wrong, pity eron Stevie, and now you pick, you have
15:48
to pick something different, unfortunately, So but what do you think. I
15:54
think that it's too obvious to be the one Aaron chose. Dude, just
15:58
thinking about the chop sticks up the nose, like my nasal passages are still
16:02
burning. Like, how good is it that he got the headaches? Because
16:04
if you didn't get the headaches have been up there forever. That's a good
16:07
thing. Or is it better to spread the mental health issue with the lady
16:11
Peen logic is truly dizzy, and yes, yes it is. Oh,
16:21
what do you think in the lady the mental health patient? Yeah, that's
16:25
what I'm going with the Florida Keys lady who peed all over herself in the
16:30
Florida Keys. I mean, yeah, she seems to happy all that property
16:36
damage. All right. Well, uh, I can't tell you. I
16:41
did not go with the five month long headache. I get migraines on the
16:45
regular and I absolutely hate them. The idea of a five month long one
16:49
fills me with terror. So no, absolutely not. Uh. It is
16:55
one hundred percent the best news story of the week. The housecats being the
16:59
same, of course, of course, because it's just humans on mass being
17:08
stupid as hell and the cat's just being adorable and being like what we didn't
17:14
do anything. And like I said, that video clip of the cat just
17:18
standing there the reporters pointing to it is hilarious and I encourage everybody to watch
17:22
it. It's even better if the cat came over. It was just like
17:27
just he just stands there and looks directly into the camera, like what.
17:33
I didn't do nothing anyway, So that is one point to define Monkey and
17:38
Kyla. Congratulations. So you are in the league and you could win the
17:48
entire episode if you win the next game. Otherwise, Steve and AUGI will
17:51
tie it up and make it a draw. We're gonna find out. Right
17:55
after this, we interrupt this program to bring you a newsplash Michael Jackson's ghost
18:08
scene out a Yankees game. Cinnamon Toast Crunch now with a shrimp in every
18:15
bite. Lil Uzivert's head Diamond has been sold on the dark Web. Stories
18:21
like this and more can be found at the ever Trending Story, a podcast
18:25
where we peruse the news and write a fun fictional story for you. Find
18:29
us wherever you download podcasts and follow us on the socials at ever Trending Pod.
18:33
And we are proud members of the Odd Pods media network. Hey,
18:45
there. I'm Dave, the host of Beer in Front. Sometimes the beer
18:49
in front of you is the best one yet. I'll talk about some old
18:55
school beers that maybe you've forgotten about, some new beers that have a bit
19:00
potential to be a classic. I'll also talk to various people around the beer
19:04
world and get their stories all about beer. That's Beer in Front and it's
19:11
available on all of your favorite podcast apps. Hey man, welcome back.
19:29
It's time for game two of Mini episode one ninety six, and we are
19:33
going to play. The rules of the game are the same. Oh shit,
19:40
we are going to play a rules of the game that we have played
19:42
on a previous episode. Now, this does give Stevie and Augie a slight
19:48
advantage, but this is offset by the fact that they are Stevie and Augyot.
19:56
Also, there are three of you as opposed to of them, and
19:59
I'm going to them go first so that you have the chance to get the
20:02
idea what's fun with them on the first All right, So this is the
20:07
rules that game we have played before. As such, guessing the rules will
20:11
not win you the game. The only way to win is to have the
20:12
most points at the end of the game. And because there's an odd number
20:15
of players, it would be unfair if you know, the three of you
20:21
combined your points against the two of them, so the single player who has
20:26
the most points will win the game for their team. Uh and no crossbord.
20:37
You can write things down if you want. Feel free to use your
20:45
handy dandy. Mine's locked. They can't write. I'm gonna tell I'm gonna
20:55
tell you right now. You probably won't need to write things down. But
20:57
let's get started show. Uh, and Aggie, we're gonna start with you
21:00
your prompt A young Bruce Wayne struggling to find his batman voice. Oh,
21:11
I bet, I bet that man, I love. That's good. That's
21:27
good, that's okay. Uh, A strong start kind of fell apart.
21:36
Didn't really explore all the possibilities. I feel you could have gone completely cartoony
21:40
with I could have gone cartoony with man as such. I am going to
21:48
give you one point, Stevie. Yeah, A tiny man falling down a
21:55
very long flight of stairs shoes, I don't am I give you. Oh,
22:07
ships war out, okay, I think I at the bottom. Let
22:18
me just fall over so you know, all right, well done. I'm
22:26
gonna give you two points, Sweet Andy. Multiple incarnations of doctor who show
22:34
up at the same time to claim the same restaurant reservation. Benny, Hell,
22:41
I'm sure I was here for six o'clock. No, no, no,
22:44
no, no, no, that was me. I'm here with my
22:48
three assistants, two of which we really don't need. But they can go
22:52
sit at the children's table. Eh Nate, I have this table? Where
22:57
are you? I am you? What you not? Yes? I am
23:02
your closet. You get there, Jesus Christ, I'm gonna cut you off.
23:10
The Uh. That was a genius and everything I wanted. Three points.
23:21
Karen, Karen and Allie Cat suddenly learns how to sing scat wa wait
23:36
wait wait what? Okay? Oh, well done, well done again everything
23:57
I wanted three points. That was delightful, Kyla. Yes, a magician
24:04
expecting a birthday party shows up at a funeral dearly beloved. Okay, Well,
24:15
the bag of tricks I brought is not appropriate. I think I have
24:21
something in here. Okay, I see Ron he liked rabbits and so and
24:37
he was a white man. So we have a white rabbit and dictually bird
24:48
out of the colon. I'm glad I'm not a ventriloquist. Well done.
24:59
It was going to be one point because it was a little weak, but
25:00
you pulled it back at the end. Uh. And good on Karen for
25:03
jumping in with the assist. Two points. All right, we're gonna mix
25:08
things up now. You're gonna do these in teams of two. Oggie and
25:15
Stevie, a pair of guilt ridden pigs, catch each other eating B l
25:21
T sandwiches. So Harvey, get your lunch today for Hey, what are
25:34
you doing? Don't fine to tell her about mine? Uh? That was
25:56
really good. Uh. I honestly think Augy like held the line share of
26:03
that one. Augie is going to get three points and Stevie you'll get two.
26:10
Next Andy and Karen, a gossipy hairdresser, learns their client is Stevie's
26:18
ex girlfriend. All right, sweetie, just have a stage. God,
26:26
thank you, don't have me? That's me Okay, thank you. I
26:33
think I'd like something a little different. I just I just broke up and
26:37
it was a terrible thing. Oh well, I'd love to hear about that,
26:41
but I'm not really interested. So we're going to go for the perm
26:45
again today, and you really should get a collaring. Yes, something fresh
26:49
I mean my ex, I don't. I don't want to tell tales.
26:53
He was weird. Yeah, I thought he was okay, you know,
26:59
he's say nice around other people and stuff. But then when you get him
27:02
alone, Oh my god. He made me buff his forehead. Yeah,
27:08
buff, yeah, buff it buff with the muff. And I don't know,
27:15
I really don't think I should be hearing this story thing, but please
27:18
keep going. Well it got all shiny and stuff. He said, I
27:22
like it this way. He said, I'm gonna leave it, and I'm
27:25
like, wait, why are you kind of do what I mean? Seriously?
27:27
Did you use wax? I used, So I'm gonna cut you off
27:37
there. Thank god, so magical. It was off to a slow start,
27:47
but when you got going, my god. Three points to each of
27:49
you, and one for Stevie's shiny head. End. A man goes to
28:03
a jewelry store looking to buy, but it becomes increasingly clear he plans to
28:08
eat the jewelry. Welcome to Rocks RS. You buy him whatever you want
28:15
with him. You gotta got like a soft rock, like a like air
28:22
supply. No, no, like a like a nice texture to it,
28:29
like you know, maybe maybe like maybe this isn't a nice cream place.
28:33
We don't tell sprinkles, no, no, no, no, I just
28:37
I'm asking, like, you know, it can like it as something that
28:38
can kind of fit in you know, about that size. You could just
28:41
kind of like if you could pop it into your mouth or something. You
28:45
know, it's just about some of that size. Maybe something that like doesn't
28:48
like, you know, scratch on the way down. You know what I'm
28:52
saying. You know, I'm thinking about how this is going to end,
28:56
and it might be a rough exit. Yeah. Yeah, we have pearls,
29:03
we have citrine, orange satrine, and those I've heard come out good
29:11
in the end, I'm gonna cut you get the pearls. That was absolutely
29:19
delightful points definitely, Kyla gets three for pulling out the air supply joke just
29:27
absolutely slaughtered me. But I mean everything else, the pearls, the orange
29:33
citrine, just wow, fantastic touches. I'll give you two points. You
29:40
were there. It could have been better, but you were good. Yeah,
29:42
I got it could have been better, but you were good. You
29:45
feed him, Sandy can make his own pearl. Stevie and and Stevie and
29:52
Andy, a pornography director and his son have the birds and the bees talk.
30:00
Yeah, Dad, So son, I wanted to make sure that before
30:07
you take my place in the family business, that you understand what everything's actually
30:17
leading up to. So come over here, Okay, hit play on the
30:22
VCR, on the on the VCR. What this Listen? If we're doing
30:30
If you're gonna go into the family business, you have to use video cassetteeves.
30:33
It's the only true medium for our profession. All right, all right,
30:37
so hit play there now, this is your mother. Now what we
30:40
need to do? Oh? That is natural? Right? Can I cut
30:49
you off? There again? Magic everything? I wanted three points each.
30:59
That's awesome. Way to screw over Aaron's expectation. No, I was going
31:03
to turn into Batman. Karen and Kyla, two sisters on the phone,
31:14
keep getting interrupted by gradually more and more important phone calls. Sorry, that
31:22
was my landlord. Apparently there's a water main break in the basement. But
31:27
it's not too bad. I think it'll be fine. Oh geez, Stacy,
31:33
hold on, I've got a call. Hello, Stacey, is it
31:40
still you? No, it's the I R S. I hits the wrong
31:52
button. Hello, yeah, Stacy, Oh there, Stacy, Oh my
31:59
god, I think I've got a dirty phone call, Tracy. Don't do
32:06
this to me again. I mean, the irist can't even call you on
32:09
the phone. Oh, I gotta I'll be okay, Oh my god,
32:15
I'll be right back, Tracy. I got a call from my boss.
32:22
Apparently our business is closing that I work for and I have no job.
32:28
Stacy, Oh my god, I was just talking to my Were you back?
32:30
Are you? I'm here? I have no job? You have no
32:36
job? What? What happened? Your job clos Hello? Hello, I'm
32:42
Stacy. I'm here. Oh I'm still here, okay with no job?
32:46
Wait? What Stacy? Did you say something before I left? What are
32:52
you there? The bottom step is starting to be wet? What whoa?
33:01
I kept waiting to hear what Karen was gonna interrupted by? She just kept
33:06
coming back into you. What did you say? Oh my god, it
33:09
is genius. I'm gonna give it was It was yeah, three points each.
33:20
It feels like like a cop out, but honestly, that was perfect.
33:24
All right. Last time around, We're going to do teams of three
33:30
Oggie, dv and Andy, the werewolf's distant cousins, the who Wolf,
33:39
the what Wolf, and the White wolf, The who? Wolf? The
33:45
wolf? Why? Who's asking? All right? Why are we here?
33:53
Who knows what's going on? Why do you want to know? What's on?
33:59
This? Guy? Who cares? Why? Why? Why won't you
34:08
answer? Mate? Why? Why? What do I say to him?
34:22
I can't do this anymore? Why not? What does Warrelds have to do
34:27
with this? What do you want to know? Oh my god, I'm
34:34
gonna cut you off? Why almost immediately? What the what the what?
34:42
I'm like, this is funny ship. I can't think of anything for sheer
34:49
commitment to the bit. Augie and Andy each get three points. Stevie,
34:55
he tried to pull down. I'm gonna give you one point. You were
35:01
having such a hard time, all right ready, Karen Kyla Augie macho man.
35:12
Randy Savage is undercover at a girl's slumber party. Oh yeah, so,
35:21
like you have really nice hair? Can I French braid it? Oh
35:24
yeah? Get that brush in there. Okay, have your bone, bring
35:31
some of those pets a role. We actually slim Joe. Yeah, I
35:36
was gonna say we have slim Jim Sandwich. Yeah, brother, slap into
35:40
a slim This news girl she is something out, Yeah, but like it's
35:45
not even that bright out? Why do they have shutter shades? When do
35:51
we go to bed and go night night? First we have to play truth
35:53
dare double dare, promise to rep bus if you fall asleep. First,
35:59
we're gonna put your hand in hot Why don't you got to go tink?
36:01
So new girl, you get a dare we do? Show us your your
36:08
boobs, show us your boobs, spendulous picks. You're very oiled. I'm
36:21
gonna cut you off there. That's perfect. Oh god, Oggie jumped straight
36:30
into it. Three points. Uh, Kyla and Karen both brilliant assistance.
36:37
Yeah it's it's a cop out, but three points for everybody shot, three
36:40
points for everybody. Everybody did great? All right, Next threesome as it
36:46
were, Stevie, Andy Karen three Arnold Schwarzenegger's meet in marvels into the Schwarzenegger
36:55
verse. Bum, Hey you over there, what kind of clothes you wear?
37:19
And I need those clothes. It's just speedo. I use it,
37:22
I use it, so you flex my ass. Hey guys, I am
37:25
here. Oh my god, it's another sexy man. We should pop by
37:31
together, because when you pop, you fus like you're coming. Oh oh
37:37
I'll be back curly mom. All right, I'm gonna damage. Oh man,
37:54
did you ever see that documentary he did? What are you saying?
37:59
Yeah? Oh my god, Stevie two points yeah, documentary, Yeah,
38:07
that was his documentary. It felt weak. I'm sorry, I just did.
38:15
And similarly also just kind of there. But your I'll be backshop was
38:22
worth two points for sure, Karen, great intro. Yeah, two points
38:25
for everybody. I think two points for everybody. All right, Next set
38:36
of three, Kyla, Augie, Stevie. Three alien abduction survivors discovered that
38:42
one of them had a wildly different experience than the other two. I don't
38:46
know what you guys are talking about. I enjoy my weekends away, all
38:51
right, Yeah, me too, Right, I had a great time.
38:53
I got a spot treatment and they gave me a new nose, and they
39:00
let me try on their clothes. It was great. Oh I think my
39:05
vacation was a little different than yours. They aintally broke me, oh in
39:12
a good way? Right? Oh yeah? Oh yeah? So like,
39:20
did they also take you to the beach on their planet? No? No,
39:24
did they take you to the drag show? No? No? You
39:27
see the thing is is they paid me for my time. Oh I didn't
39:31
get paid. I had to sit through a four hour seminar. Did you
39:40
buy the vacation time share? Well, it was like a partnership thing,
39:45
they said, Oh yeah, yeah, Well but I did get that free
39:50
nose job, so I kind of did get paid. I don't know,
39:52
I'm going to cut you off. Started getting into MLMs. Yet all three
40:04
of your experiences were wildly different, I feel, but I enjoyed the crap
40:07
out of that. So three points all around. Fine and one, two,
40:14
three and three four Kyla. Let's go on to our final threesome as
40:19
it were, Andy, Karen and Kyla, a competition about who can make
40:25
themselves the most uncomfortable and the cactus fit right up in there. Oh my
40:37
goodness. I brought my college transcripts so we can talk about how well I
40:44
did comfortable. Oh well, god, I really need to confess some things
40:52
to you guys. You know the dinner we just had, Yeah, yeah,
40:59
well, I dropped it on the floor before you guys got here.
41:01
I'm so sorry. Okay, your floors are so clean. Yeah, well,
41:07
you know that's kind of an allusion to I slipped in it. Well,
41:14
I just wanted to look nice for this though. I wore my best
41:15
super tight corset. Oh that's gonna be a problem because I brought the binder
41:21
clips, so shirts off everyone. Oh Kyla. I also wanted to tell
41:27
you that those little pants you're bearing are sea through in the pack. Oh
41:30
my god, I did I drank all that hot coffee before I came here?
41:37
Is your bath room working? I shaved my scrot All right, I'm
41:43
going to cut you off. That was perfection. That was perfection. Everybody
41:51
was perfect I did crappy in college. By the way, that is going
41:57
to be three points for everybody. And with that, the game is over.
42:00
And I can tell you the player had nineteen points and won the game
42:06
was Andy, Who are the Defined Monkey? And Kyler do? Congratulations free
42:13
captives, very very very well done, and oh my god, that was
42:19
so much fun. So it's not a draw, so we don't have to
42:22
have like a wrestling man, just lose, you guys, just congratulate.
42:29
Well, thanks so much for coming. We're going to jump right into our
42:34
outros. So Andy and Karen, where can people find the cool things that
42:37
define Monkey do? Oh? Well, we're on defiant monkey dot com and
42:42
it's got links to our books and everything. Yes, I guarantee if you're
42:46
into theater or improv at all, the Big Book of Improv Games as they
42:51
must have a right holiday gift for the theater person in your life. One
42:57
hundred percent recommend it is. It is exhaustive, and it's full of fabulous
43:02
games, most of which I'd never heard before, and I I was excited
43:07
to read a lot of them. And there's something that I want to try
43:09
someday, but for now, thank you so much for coming. Kyla.
43:14
Where can people find you? And the cool things you do? Kyla the
43:16
Koala on Instagram. I don't do a lot of fun things or cool things
43:21
right now, but I do do a lot of fun things. So if
43:22
you see me out and about in town, give me a big wave.
43:25
Your local fun person is here. Yes, absolutely, And does anyone else
43:30
have anything else they'd like to plug real quick? No good, I think
43:34
all right. In that case, we'll just go straight to the intro.
43:37
Thank you so much for listening. I hope you enjoyed it. Sorry it
43:39
was a mini episode, but that was just for time reasons, not because
43:43
we're lazy at all. And we want to thank you for listening and I
43:47
hope you enjoyed as much as I did, because holy shit, that I
43:50
enjoyed. This episode one of the best things we've ever done, I feel
43:53
like, and it was so short. You can follow us at BFYTW Podcast
44:00
emails a bfy TW podcast at gmail dot com. You can visit our website
44:05
bfy tw pod dot com and if you want to check out all the cool
44:09
things us and our friends are doing, we have links to everybody stuff there.
44:13
You can also leave us voicemails. We have a contact us section and
44:16
there's a little widget there you can leave a ninety second voicemail whether you're on
44:20
your phone or your computer, whatever works. And you can follow me online
44:24
at pantiless Eron. You can follow Stevie at Didn't I Smoke? You didn't
44:29
follow Augie at zero Ight. And I have my own book out pain.
44:32
It's not exactly the best Christmas present ever, but I think it's pretty good
44:37
and it's gotten good reviews, so these published as it's crazy, but yeah,
44:44
no, if you have a mystery thriller fan in your life, you
44:45
could probably go further wrong than buying fame for them for Christmas, so go
44:51
right at Otherwise, I think that just about covers. You can follow cev
44:55
At already. I got lost on my I tell you that I'm so unused
45:01
to doing like I'm like doing it after three that I'm like, that's what
45:06
she said. Uh so that's gonna be it from us. I think why,
45:10
because fuck you, That's why.