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Makeshifts Realities - Gertrude Robins · True Crime Library

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: The Makeshifts and Realities by Gertrude Robins. This is a
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain.
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox dot org.
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  Speaker 1: Makeshifts a lower middle class comedy. Characters. Caroline Parker, a
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: suburban young woman of about thirty, nervous mannerisms, brown hair,
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: much frizzed, dressed in a mauve silk, tight fitting blouse
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: and dark green skirt. Dolly Parker, her younger sister, aged
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: twenty eight, wearing a dark blue dress with cheap lace
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: collar inclined to brusquerie and superficial sharpness. Mister Thompson, the
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: Parker's lodger, chemist's assistant, Tall, thin and rather shy. Mister
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: Albert smythe stock choppers clerk, short, sandy haired mustache with
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: waxed ends, shiny face, general blatant appearance. Stage directions read
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: by Peter Tucker.
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: Mister Thompson read by Phil Benson. Mister Smythe read by
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: Phil Benson.
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: Caroline Parker read by Newgate novelist. Dolly Parker read by Newgate.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: Novelist Makeshifts, The Parker's sitting room, large table right center,
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: window left with small table and ferns, lace curtains and
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: canary and cage. Sideboard upright with cruet stand, biscuit box,
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: silver teapot, et cetera. Chairs, round center table, fireplace back
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: left center with over mantel, mirror, clock and ornaments. Easy
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: chairs on either side of fireplace. Caroline Sewing at back
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: of table. Right, Dolly reading Novelette by fire left.
• 1:54
  Speaker 3: You didn't forget to order the soap from Brown's, did you, Dolly? No,
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: I mean yes, I did.
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: Order it, Carolyn turning lamp up.
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: Did you tell them we must have it by nine? Oh? Yes,
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: don't worry. It's very well to say don't worry, but
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: you forget. Missus Hunt's coming at eight and has an
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: awful lot of washing This time. I shall have to
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: get up at half past six to get the boiler
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: going properly. Missus Coxe called this afternoon. Oh what did
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: she want? Nothing? Only wasted my time. All her pipes
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: burst last week quite spoilt one of her drawing room chairs.
• 2:35
  Speaker 3: She says, how exciting you are grumpy to night, Dolly? Well,
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: I'm tired, so am I But I don't see that's
• 2:45
  Speaker 3: any reason for being disagreeable. Oh dolly, isn't it a nuisance?
• 2:51
  Speaker 3: We've got to have some coal in and the last
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: lot aren't paid for yet, and the twenty eight shillings now, well,
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: I suppose we shall have to use fifteen shillings I'd
• 3:01
  Speaker 3: saved towards a new jacket. I wish we needn't do that.
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: You haven't had a new one for three years. What's
• 3:09
  Speaker 3: it matter? There's no one to notice what I wear. Well,
• 3:14
  Speaker 3: perhaps you might lend it, and then I'll give you
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: some of mister Thompson's money at the end of the week,
• 3:19
  Speaker 3: and when Mark gets a dividend, she must make up
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: the rest. Well, then will you order whole for ton
• 3:26
  Speaker 3: to morrow? All right? What's been so difficult to day?
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: She quite tired me out? Anything fresh? Oh? I don't know.
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: She's got some new idea, that she's being neglected, or
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: that we don't confide in her or something. Well, that's
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: better than when she gets MOPy and retrospective and talks
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: about her unhappy past. Still, dolly, she has had a
• 3:52
  Speaker 3: hard time of it, Well haven't we all? And isn't
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: it going to be so world without end? Amen? I
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: don't know. I'm sure. Oh, missus Coxe says. Those new
• 4:05
  Speaker 3: people two doors off are an awfully funny lot.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: Dolly puts book in her lap and listens.
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: They haven't any carpets, and they don't touch butcher's meat,
• 4:15
  Speaker 3: and their servant actually has her meals with her family.
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: Missus Cox thinks they must be socialists or Christian scientists.
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: There are some funny people in the world, yes, aren't there.
• 4:29
  Speaker 3: Why I was talking to that new teacher we've got
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: to day and my dear, if you please, she's a suffragette.
• 4:35
  Speaker 3: Oh of course I didn't say what I've thought of them,
• 4:39
  Speaker 3: but she's evidently deadly serious. It beats me how people
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: can make such idiots of themselves. A lot of good
• 4:45
  Speaker 3: a vote would be to me, but I think there
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: may be something in it. You know, by the bye,
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: did you wash up the tea things? Dolly? Oh bother, No,
• 4:57
  Speaker 3: I'll do it when I get more's supper.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: Doll putting her book down and looking up.
• 5:02
  Speaker 3: Gracious, Why you've changed your blouse. I didn't know any
• 5:07
  Speaker 3: one was coming this evening. Don't be so so. I
• 5:12
  Speaker 3: suppose I can put something fresh on if I like
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: after spending the whole day in that stuffy, poky kitchen,
• 5:18
  Speaker 3: stewing over the hot fire and washing up greasy saucepans.
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: I'd just like you to try it for a bit
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: and see how you like it. I shouldn't like it
• 5:27
  Speaker 3: at all, my dear, But then I don't suppose you'd
• 5:30
  Speaker 3: enjoy seven hours a day with a lot of horrid, noisy,
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: fidgety children driving you mad. Why you'd chuck it up
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: the first row you got into with the inspector. No,
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: I expect it must be pretty sickening. I wouldn't mind
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: so much if there were any chance of things over
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: being different. But there's nothing to look forward to. It
• 5:52
  Speaker 3: will always be.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: The same dolly looking into fire.
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: I shall go on hammering d O G dog C
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: A T cat and twice eleven are twenty two and
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: twice twelve are twenty four into wooden headed brats, and
• 6:12
  Speaker 3: you'll be skivy an housekeeper combined, and look after mar
• 6:16
  Speaker 3: and wait on the lodger, and scrape and contrive to
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: make both ends meet till we're both too old for anything. Oh,
• 6:24
  Speaker 3: don't be so depressing, doll. It gets on my nerves. Besides,
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: you never know something nice might happen. Why one of
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: us might might might even get married? You might? You
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: mean fat lot of men wanting to marry a school
• 6:41
  Speaker 3: teacher blossom. They'd be afraid they'd get euclid instead of
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: eggs and bacon for breakfast, and that their buttons would
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: never be sewn on. Oh no, then fight shy of
• 6:52
  Speaker 3: girls like me. They think we're too clever. They like nice, domesticated,
• 6:57
  Speaker 3: homely girls beside gides. What chance do we have of
• 7:02
  Speaker 3: ever getting to know fellows? We've no father and no brothers.
• 7:06
  Speaker 3: How should I get to know men at a girl's
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: school or you sticking at home all day? Why we
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: don't see a man to speak to from one week's
• 7:14
  Speaker 3: end to another except mister Thompson. And there's precious little
• 7:19
  Speaker 3: romance about our lodger as far as I'm concerned, even
• 7:23
  Speaker 3: though he is a chemist's assistant.
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: Caroline rising and putting on half finished blouse which she
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: has been making.
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: Oh but he's a godsend to us. I don't know
• 7:33
  Speaker 3: how we should have managed the rent without his thirteen
• 7:36
  Speaker 3: shillings every.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: Week crossing over towards fireplace.
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: Besides, he's nice and quiet in the house and very considerate,
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: and he doesn't come home late or tipsy like anyone
• 7:47
  Speaker 3: else we might have got.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: Caroline after trying to see back of blouse and glass.
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: Dolly, you might just tell me how this fits on
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: the shoulder.
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: Dolly rises.
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: It's such a bar there.
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: Looking into mirror of the fire.
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: I'm afraid I've cut the neck out too far. I
• 8:05
  Speaker 3: shall have to join a bit on or put some
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: lace over it.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: Dolly, standing at adjusting back of blouse.
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: No, it only wants taking up a little Give me
• 8:15
  Speaker 3: a pin.
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: Noise of door banging slightly heard off? Right?
• 8:20
  Speaker 3: Who's that?
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: Turning round to face Dolly.
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: It isn't hate, is it. It's only mister Thompson. Who
• 8:27
  Speaker 3: else do you think it is?
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: Gentle? Tap at door?
• 8:31
  Speaker 3: There he is bother? Come in, but I can't be
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: seen like this. For goodness sake, Thompson doesn't count. You
• 8:40
  Speaker 3: needn't worry about him.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: Come in, Thompson, entering nervously, right, pauses just inside door.
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: Good evening, Miss Caroline, Good evening, Miss Dolly, busy as usual,
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: with a nervous smile.
• 8:56
  Speaker 3: Oh yes, mister Thompson, there is always something to do.
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: Won't you sit down?
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: Oh no, I'm afraid I I don't think I can
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: thank you. I'm a just going out again to the
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: post and aer. I've er promised to help mister standing
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: at the dispensary this evening. It's left off raining. I've
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: just taken the liberty of bringing you ladies a few sweets.
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: I hope you won't mind it.
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: Just bag of sweets on the table.
• 9:25
  Speaker 3: Oh but mister Thompson, you shouldn't. Really, you're too good.
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: Dolly sits again with her book.
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: But thank you very much, all the same. It is
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: kind of you, isn't it, Dolly, Yes, very thanks awfully.
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: Still reading Thompson, gazing at Caroline.
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: Oh, not at all. I hope they're the sort you like.
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: Backing the door right, good night, good night, exits awkwardly. Right.
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: Oh, that man is a trial.
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: He does worry me, Caroline, crossing to Dolly with sweets.
• 10:02
  Speaker 3: Well, I don't suppose you'll be above eating his sweets.
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: There aren't so many men who take the trouble to
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: give us things anyhow.
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: Crossing back to table right center, she sits down to
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: work on blause again.
• 10:14
  Speaker 3: Give you things, you mean, don't be so snappy for
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: goodness sake, look at that lovely pencil case. Mister Phillips
• 10:22
  Speaker 3: gave you a teaster You know you were awfully pleased
• 10:25
  Speaker 3: about it. Yes, and I've never heard the last about
• 10:29
  Speaker 3: it from you. And more since, there's a fat lot
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: of excitement about a present from a Sunday school superintendent,
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: isn't there? Oh, Dolly, you are always so discontented. We
• 10:40
  Speaker 3: do know some nice people, after all. I like your
• 10:44
  Speaker 3: idea of some nice people. A tame chemist's assistant who's
• 10:48
  Speaker 3: our lodger, and a bald headed Sunday school superintendent. But Dolly,
• 10:54
  Speaker 3: you haven't you didn't you're not reckoning why you've forgotten
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: mister Smith. Oh? Yes, to be sure anyway, you are
• 11:05
  Speaker 3: not likely to forget him. Well, he's something, isn't he?
• 11:09
  Speaker 3: And I expect we shall get to know some of
• 11:10
  Speaker 3: his friends we Oh, by the way, shall we have
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: some coffee to night? If he, I mean, mister Smith
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: should happen to drop in, it would be rather nice.
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: Oh then you are expecting someone. Oh, I'm not certain
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: something was said about it.
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: She leaves off sewing and turns round to her sister
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: to talk to her.
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: But Dolly, I do wish she wouldn't be so sharp
• 11:38
  Speaker 3: with him. If he does come, it isn't nice of you.
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: You always go on reading when he's in the room.
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: It's uncomfortable for him. And besides, it isn't polite. Why
• 11:50
  Speaker 3: shouldn't I you know jolly well that he doesn't come
• 11:53
  Speaker 3: to see me. I should have thought you two would
• 11:55
  Speaker 3: like to have all the talking to yourselves. If that
• 11:58
  Speaker 3: isn't being polite, what.
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: Is Caroline resuming her work?
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: Well, don't let's have a row about it. What's upset
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: you to day? Dolly? Nothing?
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: Dolly throwing book on floor and gazing into fire.
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: Only it's pretty sickening to be twenty eight and feel
• 12:19
  Speaker 3: that you're growing old and dull with never any real
• 12:22
  Speaker 3: fun or amusement like other girls, girls who are taken
• 12:25
  Speaker 3: to theaters and dances and wear pretty things and get
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: married and have nice houses and gardens and servants and
• 12:34
  Speaker 3: don't have to worry about every hapney they spend. It's
• 12:38
  Speaker 3: all so hopeless because neither of us can do anything
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: different with this skimpy, rotten education we got when we
• 12:45
  Speaker 3: were kids, and no training to do anything in particular.
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: We are expected to earn our own living. You, as
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: genteel general servant, and I as an assistant teacher of infants,
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: and so here we are hopeless and helpless, and we
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: might as well be on a desert island. Ah, well,
• 13:06
  Speaker 3: it's no good talking.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: Caroline rising and puts her work on sideboard it back.
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: I may as well go and put more's supper on
• 13:15
  Speaker 3: the tray.
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: About to exit, right stops as she hears loud knock
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: at front door, turning to Dolly.
• 13:22
  Speaker 3: That must be him, mister Smithe. I'm sure it is.
• 13:25
  Speaker 3: He's got such a firm knock, hasn't he knock? You go, Dolly,
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: there's a dear You go yourself. You know you are
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: dying too violent? Rat tat look sharp, or he'll have
• 13:38
  Speaker 3: the place down.
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: Knock. Caroline exits hurriedly. Right Dolly rises and quickly arranges
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: herself at glass. She sits down again, listens, but appears
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: absorbed in her book. As door opens, Caroline enters, radiant,
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: followed by Smithe. Caroline, right center.
• 13:58
  Speaker 3: Dolly, here's mister Smith. Isn't he naughty? He says he's
• 14:01
  Speaker 3: been knocking for ten minutes. I'm sure you.
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: Can't have really, Dolly lift Well.
• 14:08
  Speaker 3: He's had time to collect his thoughts.
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: Then rising, how do you do? Extends hand awkwardly.
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: Well, you girls, how are you going along? Thought you'd
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: be by yourself tonight? That's for usual.
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: Standing back to fire and I.
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: Might as well drop in and have a bit of
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: a war map.
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: Turning round and warming hands at fire crumbs.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: It's jolly cold out tonight.
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: As he turns, he sees chocolate on mantel shelf.
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: What how chocolates.
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: Takes Someone continues munching throughout scene.
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: Oh you, poor dear man, Come and sit in the
• 14:45
  Speaker 3: easy chair. We were just going to have some coffee,
• 14:47
  Speaker 3: won't we, Dolly, I'll run and fetch it. You'd like
• 14:50
  Speaker 3: a cup, wouldn't you? It will warm you up.
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: Carolyn kneels down and puts coals on fire.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: How I don't mind if I do. You're very here,
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: you girls? What I mean to say? You know how
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: to look after yourselves, all right? Trust you for that? What?
• 15:08
  Speaker 3: Well, there's no one else too if we don't.
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: Sitting right by table.
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: Quite right, Always keep your optic on number one, That's
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: what I say.
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: Eh Smith lighting a cigarette?
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: Now, what about that cup of coffee you was making
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: such a song about.
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: It won't be a minute, Dolly, mind you entertained, mister
• 15:29
  Speaker 3: Smith whilst I'm gone.
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: We look after ourselves all right, but mine. Don't you
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: leave us alone too long?
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: Higsit Caroline laughing Smith watching her out.
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: Nice girl, your sister a bit of all right. She
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: is something kind of only about her that I like.
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: She'd make any chap that married her jolly comfortable. Now
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: you know you're different.
• 15:54
  Speaker 3: I reckon, yes, it would be easier for me to
• 15:58
  Speaker 3: make some people I know uncomfortable.
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: Dolly at table right.
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: Oh, I say, you know, if you're so sharp, you'll
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: cut your face one of these days. And it don't
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: always pay to be so clever. What I mean to
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: say is it isn't every chap likes it. Of course,
• 16:16
  Speaker 2: I don't mind myself. I don't take any notice of
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: what you say. Now. What I meant was, you're not
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: like your sister because you're more brainy, always got a
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: book in your hand. But you are just a bit
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: too smart. It will put some chaps quite off.
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: I tell you that would worry me.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: There you go again. But you can't afford to be
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: so stuck up about it as all that. What I
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: mean to say is you'll want some chap to marry
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: you someday, won't you? And that isn't the way I
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: set about it.
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: I'm not so anxious.
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: I was say, well, I think it's time that you
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: ought to be this independence, earning your own living and
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: all that. It's all very fine when you young, But
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: what I say is, what's it going to lead to?
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: What about when you're old? That's where it comes in.
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: It's then you want a man to look after you
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: and buy your new hats and frocks and a nice
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: little home with a servant to do the work, and
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: nothing to do but enjoy yourself, ain't it.
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: Yes?
• 17:19
  Speaker 3: I know, but there's nobody likely to want to marry me.
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: And besides, ohbod, it isn't so bad as all that.
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: You take my word. You're good looking, you know, and
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: you've a decent figure and all that, and so long
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: as you don't bite a chap's head off every time
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: he opens his mouth. You needn't be left on the shelf,
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: not but what you ought to be keeping your eyes
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: open and watching out for a probable starter. Of course,
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: it's not in my business, and I don't want to interfere,
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: but I take a sort of interest in you girls,
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: especially you. You know you're clever and can understand a
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: fellow's ideas, and that's what a man likes.
• 17:58
  Speaker 3: But if you think so much of marriage, why don't you.
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: Practice what you m Ah Well, we'll have to see
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: how things turn out. Anyway. I've got a rise this
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: year and going along very nicely now, and my wife,
• 18:16
  Speaker 2: what may be, won't have to go out to work.
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: You can bet on that you can furnish so cheap
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: too nowadays. What I mean to say is a couple
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: of quid down and you get the old outfit piano
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: and all would you think of that?
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: Eh Smith? Winking?
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: You wouldn't think twice about it? If a chap like
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: me come along with a proposition like that, would you?
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: It all depends quite so, quite so. But when there's
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: a chance of a windfall of that sort, it's as
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: well to be prepared, ain't it.
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: Smith crosses to Dolly lived, mouthful of chocolates, hands in
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: pocket and portentious here.
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: Now, Dolly, no larks strictly on the q tea between ourselves,
• 19:01
  Speaker 2: are come in this evening to ask you to tell
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: you something very particular. Well, mister Smith, ah well, there
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: now never mind another time. Perhaps your sister will be
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: coming in in a minute.
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: Smith turning to go upstage. Dolly rises, Oh, I know
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: she won't.
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: What is it, well, or mean to say? You see,
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: it's like this. I don't want you to think I'll
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: make it too bold, But what I want to ask
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: you is this, Yes, is there anything up between you
• 19:37
  Speaker 2: and old Phillips, you know, the bald edded chap what
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: sometimes takes your Sunday school class? Not my business, of course,
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: but good.
• 19:46
  Speaker 3: Gracious, the idea I should think. Not indeed, howd that
• 19:52
  Speaker 3: got anything to do with what you were going to
• 19:54
  Speaker 3: ask me?
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: Oh? Well, I say, I don't want you to be offended.
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: He's not bad Chap, and I'll take a sort of
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: interest in you. I'll know a bit about Phillips, and
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: he's not half a bad catch, and not nearly so
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: old as he looks, and his people are all right too,
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: and there's a tidy bit of money in that family,
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: Ah know his sister rather well? You know, Well, what
• 20:17
  Speaker 2: I meant to say was I was thinking, anyway you
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: might yes.
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: Into Carolin with coffee, sugar, milk, et cetera. Entree right door,
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: Smith going up stage to fire.
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: Oh, here's the coffee, and it ought to be all right.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: So Dolly crosses left center.
• 20:38
  Speaker 3: Wait till you've tried it, Caroline.
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: She lifts up one lump of sugar for Smith's approval.
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: Go on, Caroline puts slump in cup and extends second
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: piece in tongs.
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: Same again.
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: Caroline repeats business.
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: With third lamp its our repeat O.
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: Caroline holds up fourth lamp.
• 21:00
  Speaker 3: My word, you have got a sweet.
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: Tooth, sweet tooth, sweet nature.
• 21:05
  Speaker 3: Oh, mister Smith.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: Handing him cup. Boys heard calling Dolly, Dolly.
• 21:15
  Speaker 3: Oh bother, there's more. Didn't you just take a supper up? Carry?
• 21:19
  Speaker 3: I suppose I must.
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: Go remember me to the old lady, won't you.
• 21:24
  Speaker 3: Oh, there's not much chance of forgetting you.
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: Dolly exits laughing.
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: Your Dolly is a fair knockout, she is, mind you.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: I like to see a girl with a bit of
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: going her, but she's a little bit too ikey she is. Now,
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: you're more up to my ideas. I mean to say,
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: your mother sought a girl to make a man comfortable.
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: You say, a chap don't want a girl to jump
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: down his throat every time he opens his mouth. You're
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: more what I call affectionate and womanly.
• 21:56
  Speaker 3: Oh what nonsense?
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: Caroline crosses the fire left and sits down.
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: And now what it is? I can't make it out
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: why you didn't get married? N it's only girl like you.
• 22:10
  Speaker 3: Well, nobody's ever asked me. I've only known such a
• 22:13
  Speaker 3: few men.
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: Well you do surprise me now with me? You know,
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: it's just the opposite. It's taking me all my time
• 22:21
  Speaker 2: to keep the.
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: Girls off Smith with smug satisfaction and sweeping gesture.
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: Why they're all over me. If I was to tell
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: you the names of some of the girls what have
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: thrown themselves at me and fairly asked me to marry them,
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: well it would stagger humanity, it would you take my word?
• 22:42
  Speaker 3: Oh, mister smithe, you don't say so. How could they?
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: Oh? Well, of course, you see, they're a different sorts
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: what you are. I don't mind a bit of cuddling
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: and squeezing and all that, just to pass the time.
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: That's all right in its way. But as for marrying,
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: that'st No thanks, says your humble servant. I'm not taking
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: any but you now, you're all right, or I shouldn't
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: be in quite so often. A fellow that goes about
• 23:10
  Speaker 2: among society at all has got to look after himself
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: these days.
• 23:15
  Speaker 3: But we're always very pleased to see you, mister Smith.
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: Oh that's all right. I like to cheer you up.
• 23:23
  Speaker 2: A bit must be deuced slow for you girls here
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: by yourselves. And as a matter of fact, I dropped
• 23:30
  Speaker 2: in to night on purpose to see you about something
• 23:32
  Speaker 2: very special, not really well now it's like this, you see,
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: I'm pretty tired of knocking about alone, living in digs
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: by myself and no one to look after me or
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: to talk to. And I've been turning it over in
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: my mind. Yes, yes, say, there's so many ways in
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: which a fellow gets done in. Now there's a washing,
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: I reckon. They charge me a shilling or one of
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: sixpence a week more than they would if there was
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: someone to look after things for me. And the scuttles
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: of coals they say, are use all at sixpence a
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: time too, and they charge a shocking lot for mending,
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: which I shouldn't have to pay for at all. Mind you.
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: They always say that it doesn't cost a bit more
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: for two to live than one. Now what's your idea.
• 24:22
  Speaker 3: I'm sure it can't cost more With a little management.
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: It's wicked for them to charge you for mending. I've
• 24:29
  Speaker 3: often thought how lonely it must be for you.
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: Lonely? Why that isn't the word. It's rotten all by myself.
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: It's enough to give anyone the pip. And you know
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: I'm fond of society too.
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: And just fancy if you were ill with no one
• 24:46
  Speaker 3: to look after you properly.
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: Yes, that's what I've been thinking lately when I'm a
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: bit off color. Now what sort of a husband you
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: reckon i'd make?
• 24:56
  Speaker 3: I'm sure I don't know you see well, I've never
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: thought about it before, But do you really mean?
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: Gentle? Knock at the door, enter Thomson.
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: Oh, I beg your pardon, miss Caroline. I didn't know
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: you were engaged. I thought you were alone. I've only
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: come to bring you this evening's paper. I thought you
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: might like to see it. Oh, I'll say, that's just
• 25:21
  Speaker 2: what I wanted to see.
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: Smythe crossing over to him, takes paper and opens it,
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: takes out chocolate from bag in pocket, and throws it
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: across table towards Thomson.
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: Have a chocolate, old boy, No thanks, I don't care
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: for sweets, all the more for us.
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: Then smythe taking chocolate back and eating it.
• 25:43
  Speaker 3: Won't you sit down?
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: Yes, go on make yourself as home old.
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: Chap, smythe crossing back to fire.
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: No, thanks very much, I must be going, really, I
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: didn't mean to intrude. It's come on to rain again.
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: Good night.
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: Well, so long, old boy exit Thompson. Smith whistles meaningly.
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: So that's it? Is it? What is?
• 26:13
  Speaker 3: Mister smithe? I don't know what you mean?
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: Oh, yes, you do, you know right enough? You quiet girls?
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: You're a hot lot, you.
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: Are, Smith pointing at her.
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: I saw him making goo goo eyes at you. When's
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: the wedding?
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: Oh, dumpy, Such a tease, mister Thompson. Indeed the idea.
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: He does look a bit of a mug. But you
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: never know with some of these dark horses. Still a
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: And after all, you never knows. You'll lack dear, Eh,
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: what how absurd you are? Oh but I'm not joking,
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: I'm not really now. I'm not a man to talk
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: about myself. You know that, don't you? Yes, well, but
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: this evening, I tell you straight, I've got a bit
• 27:06
  Speaker 2: of news that will make you sit up well tell me, well,
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: I've been talking to you about getting married, haven't I? Yes, yes,
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: And you think it's a sound proposition, now, don't you? Yes,
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: mister Smith, Well I think so too. So we're agreed,
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: ain't we?
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: Yes?
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: Certainly?
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: But well, what I wanted to say was I mean
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: to say? You see, it's like this, I.
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: Into Dolly, noisily.
• 27:39
  Speaker 3: I've settled mare right for the night. She's got a
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: supper and she's had a medicine, so I hope I
• 27:45
  Speaker 3: can have a little piece.
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: Now, Dolly sitting down at the lift of table.
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: If I sha'n't be in the way there she goes again,
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: Well you are a girl, bring your chair up to
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: the fire, make yourself atone. There's place to your room.
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: She comes up to fire and sitting arm't you that's right?
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: Well, now look here, I might as well tell the
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: pair of you what I came to see you for
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: this evening. Oh but really, well, I say, you are
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: a funny lot. Why not now it's what I came for.
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: Carolyn and Dolly look apprehensive.
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: Well, then, without any more beating about the bush, it's
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: like this, yours truly, Albert J. Smither Squire is going
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: is going to be married. There, Oh, he's going to
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: be married. Well what do you think of that? Now? Eh?
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: How's that for a bit of news. I bet you
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: won't guess who it is. But she's a winner, she
• 28:46
  Speaker 2: is you take my word. Well, ain't either of you
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: going to wish me luck?
• 28:51
  Speaker 3: But but but who?
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: Well, I don't mind telling you, but not a word,
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: not a word to a soul. Now we want to
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: keep it quiet for a bit. The happy bride to
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: be is miss Rose Phillips, Sidney Villa, Saint George's Square,
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: the sister of the gent What you and I was
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: mentioning a little time.
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: Back, smive expressive wink at dolly.
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: Ah, I thought that would surprise you.
• 29:21
  Speaker 3: Well, I'm sure I congratulate you, mister Smith. I hope
• 29:27
  Speaker 3: you'll be very, very happy, mister Smith.
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: Oh I'll watch that. Rose isn't awful bad sort, not
• 29:36
  Speaker 2: fussy or clever, but understands a fellow. And what's more,
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: she's got a useful little bit in the bank too,
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: that her grandmother left her. And that's always andy. Oh. Yes,
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: what I'm mean to say is I think I'm doing
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: the right thing for myself this time. Every man ought
• 29:52
  Speaker 2: to get married, and we've all got to come to it,
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: sooner or later. I'll bring my I'd go around to
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: see you one Saturday afternoon. But don't you tell her
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: too much about me. She's a bit jealous, you know.
• 30:04
  Speaker 2: I'm rather a popular chat with the ladies somehow, and
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: I'll have to be careful walk with a Sunday school
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: superintendent for a brother in law.
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: Smile looks at watch.
• 30:15
  Speaker 2: Lord love her duck. Half past ten, and I promise
• 30:18
  Speaker 2: to fetch rose from her choral society. Of course, she'll
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: have to give up all that sort of gadding about
• 30:25
  Speaker 2: once she's married and settled down. But still, as she says,
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: it's a pity to waste the subscription. Now well, so long.
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: Girls shakes hands with the two girls.
• 30:37
  Speaker 2: Thought i'd cheer you up a bit tonight. I'll pop
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: in again when when I haven't much to do.
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: Tatar Caroline rises.
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: You needn't see me out. I don't mind shutting the door.
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: Myself exits smiled. Caroline stands by fire, gazing into it.
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: Dolly picks up her book. They remain silent. Door bangs.
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: Dolly puts down book and crosses to sideboard, where she
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: gets another smaller one and notebook, with which she sits
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: at table center, facing the audience, head resting on her hands,
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: elbows on table, Carolyn wipes away a tear.
• 31:14
  Speaker 3: What are you doing, Dolly. I'm preparing for a Sunday
• 31:18
  Speaker 3: school class. I've got to take it tomorrow, and I
• 31:22
  Speaker 3: want to listen to be specially good. Why specially good? Oh?
• 31:27
  Speaker 3: Because because well, for one thing, mister Phillips will be
• 31:32
  Speaker 3: back from his holidays. And oh, I.
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: See Caroline crosses to Dolly, puts hands on her shoulders
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: and kisses her good night. Dear Dolly, looking up surprised.
• 31:47
  Speaker 3: Why you've been crying. Oh, I've got a bit of
• 31:51
  Speaker 3: a headache.
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: I think Caroline crosses left center.
• 31:56
  Speaker 3: But what's the matter? Oh some I was thinking of.
• 32:01
  Speaker 3: It's nothing.
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: Caroline rushes, steers away, looks at clock.
• 32:08
  Speaker 3: I've got an idea. There's just time.
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: She crosses the room towards doors, speaking as she goes.
• 32:15
  Speaker 3: Before the shop shut, to run round and get a
• 32:17
  Speaker 3: haddock for mister Thompson's breakfast. He's very fond of fish.
• 32:22
  Speaker 3: I remember he said he liked haddock better than anything.
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: Exit hurriedly. Dolly remains watching Caroline go off, turns to
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: book again, looks up, suddenly closes book, pushes it from her,
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: and collapses, her head buried on her arms. Slow curtain
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: end of Makeshifts Realities by Gertrude Robbins. This is a
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain.
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: For more in a volunteer, please visit LibriVox dot org.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: Realities a middle class comedy in one act to be
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: played as a sequel to Makeshifts or independently dramatis persone.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: Missus Henry Thompson nay Carolyn Parker, aged thirty two, tired
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: looking and dowdy Missus Albert Smythe Ney Rose Phillips, aged
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: twenty eight, shourily dressed, self satisfied Henry Thompson, assistant at
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: wholesale Druggists, aged thirty five, awkward, simple and shy Albert Smythe,
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: aged thirty three, stock jobbers Clark florid, startish, self assertive
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: with Cockney mannerisms. Scene the Thompson's parlor in the Suburbs,
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: same set as for Makeshifts Time the present stage directions
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: read by Peter Tucker.
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: Mister Smithe read by Phil Banson. Mister Thompson read by
• 34:02
  Speaker 2: Phil Benson.
• 34:04
  Speaker 3: Missus Henry Thompson read by Newgate Novelist. Missus Albert Smithe
• 34:10
  Speaker 3: read by Newgate.
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: Novelist Realities Ordinary suburban Parlor. Missus Thompson sitting at table
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: with work basket at her elbow. Missus Smithe an easy
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: chair by fire.
• 34:24
  Speaker 3: Well, I'm sure, I'm very glad I've found you at home.
• 34:27
  Speaker 3: I don't know what I should have done if you'd
• 34:29
  Speaker 3: been out. I hadn't got my umbrella, and just as
• 34:31
  Speaker 3: I was going past your door, it came down in Torrance.
• 34:34
  Speaker 3: It's lucky you were in. Oh, I'm pretty sure to
• 34:38
  Speaker 3: be in of an afternoon. And how's mister Thompson getting on?
• 34:42
  Speaker 3: I haven't seen him for a long time. Nicely, thank you?
• 34:46
  Speaker 3: How is er? How is mister Smithe. Oh, he went
• 34:50
  Speaker 3: to see the doctor last week. He was a bit
• 34:52
  Speaker 3: worried about himself, but it was only the indigestion. Those
• 34:56
  Speaker 3: city lunches, you know what stock exchange gentlemen. He has
• 35:01
  Speaker 3: to take care of himself. They think the world of
• 35:03
  Speaker 3: em At the office, he says, Yes, he's so clever,
• 35:07
  Speaker 3: isn't he. It's funny he was talking of you last night.
• 35:11
  Speaker 3: I didn't think I should be seeing you so soon,
• 35:14
  Speaker 3: really was he? Yes, he was saying, what a quiet
• 35:18
  Speaker 3: sort of girl you were when he knew you before
• 35:21
  Speaker 3: you were married, And I said, you aren't much different now.
• 35:24
  Speaker 3: Why don't you get out more, go about and see people.
• 35:27
  Speaker 3: I don't believe in sticking indoors all day long. You
• 35:30
  Speaker 3: don't get any thanks for it either, But there's so
• 35:34
  Speaker 3: much to do. I can't leave the house.
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: Well.
• 35:37
  Speaker 3: I don't know how you put up with it. It
• 35:39
  Speaker 3: wouldn't suit me. If I don't get out of an
• 35:41
  Speaker 3: afternoon and see people, I get all anyhow, you know
• 35:44
  Speaker 3: what I mean? Gets on my nerves. It's so dull
• 35:47
  Speaker 3: at home and nothing to do. Well, you've got a servant,
• 35:51
  Speaker 3: you see, and that makes all the difference when one
• 35:54
  Speaker 3: has to do all the housework. You don't mean to
• 35:57
  Speaker 3: say you do it all yourself. Yes, I do, oh
• 36:00
  Speaker 3: every bit. It would kill me. Why don't you keep
• 36:03
  Speaker 3: a girl? We can't afford it, but a girl doesn't
• 36:07
  Speaker 3: cost very much? Really? Why when we first married I
• 36:11
  Speaker 3: only gave my two shillings a week and her food
• 36:13
  Speaker 3: of course, still bread's cheap enough she wasn't any good
• 36:17
  Speaker 3: at the work. I always had to be going on
• 36:19
  Speaker 3: at her. But at any rate, it was some one
• 36:22
  Speaker 3: to open the door. I think it's dreadful to have
• 36:24
  Speaker 3: to go to the door yourself. I've never done that.
• 36:28
  Speaker 3: But we never have any real visitors except the vicar,
• 36:32
  Speaker 3: and he's so nice. I don't mind him. But you
• 36:35
  Speaker 3: must have more collars than that. What about your at
• 36:38
  Speaker 3: home days? Oh, I don't have one. Don't have an
• 36:42
  Speaker 3: at home day? Gracious why? I don't know anybody who
• 36:46
  Speaker 3: hasn't one. You ought to, really, it must be such
• 36:51
  Speaker 3: an expense. Oh no, it doesn't cost anything to speak of.
• 36:55
  Speaker 3: Have it two days running so that you can make
• 36:57
  Speaker 3: the same cakes do with a few new ones. On top,
• 37:00
  Speaker 3: of course, you can't expect to know people if you
• 37:03
  Speaker 3: don't have an at home day, That's what I say.
• 37:06
  Speaker 3: And you're different, You've so many friends. I was just
• 37:10
  Speaker 3: like you when I started, didn't know a soul. But
• 37:13
  Speaker 3: I went about everywhere bazaars, tennis, teas, whist drives, at
• 37:17
  Speaker 3: homes and everything. And now it's about as much as
• 37:20
  Speaker 3: I can do to keep in with them at all.
• 37:22
  Speaker 3: Do you know I've got forty six people on my list.
• 37:26
  Speaker 3: I can't think how you do it? Oh? Well, it's Albert.
• 37:29
  Speaker 3: He's such a one for getting into society. Besides, he says,
• 37:34
  Speaker 3: what's the use of having clothes if you don't wear them?
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: How do you like this? I noticed you looking at it,
• 37:40
  Speaker 3: brown and kendles. I got it at cheap too, five
• 37:44
  Speaker 3: seventeen and eleven. It was when I got it at
• 37:46
  Speaker 3: five four, lined all through with silk. It is. I
• 37:50
  Speaker 3: never pay what they ask. You know like it?
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: Oh?
• 37:54
  Speaker 3: I think it's beautiful, so cheerful too. You ought to
• 37:57
  Speaker 3: get something like it just suit you. Give you a
• 38:01
  Speaker 3: bit more color. You're so pale, aren't you. I could
• 38:05
  Speaker 3: never spend five pounds on one frock you make, mister
• 38:09
  Speaker 3: Thompson give you one. Of course. I buy my own
• 38:11
  Speaker 3: clothes myself. You see, I've got my own money. Not
• 38:15
  Speaker 3: but what I don't make Albert buy me something now?
• 38:17
  Speaker 3: And again? You know on principle, he says, I pay
• 38:20
  Speaker 3: for dressing. Of course, some women do. I thought this
• 38:24
  Speaker 3: would do so nicely for going away. We're going to
• 38:26
  Speaker 3: Folkeston this year. I like Folkston. It's so refined. Yes,
• 38:33
  Speaker 3: I've always heard it's a nice place. Where are you
• 38:36
  Speaker 3: going for your holidays. I don't think we shall go
• 38:40
  Speaker 3: away this year. Oh but really you ought to Why
• 38:44
  Speaker 3: you didn't go anywhere last year, did you?
• 38:46
  Speaker 2: No?
• 38:46
  Speaker 3: I couldn't very well. It was just before baby came.
• 38:51
  Speaker 3: But we had a nice time the year before. Lasked
• 38:53
  Speaker 3: at Clacton when we went for our honeymoon. It's a
• 38:56
  Speaker 3: very pleasant place. I think rather trippery, isn't it. Perhaps
• 39:01
  Speaker 3: it is, but I liked to see them all enjoying themselves,
• 39:05
  Speaker 3: so it wouldn't suit mister Smithe. I'm afraid he's so
• 39:09
  Speaker 3: particular where he goes, nothing but the best for him,
• 39:12
  Speaker 3: Eastbourne or Scarborough or some really select watering place. Oh yes,
• 39:18
  Speaker 3: of course, I say. Has it stopped raining? Do you
• 39:21
  Speaker 3: think i'll see.
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: Missus Thompson looks out of window.
• 39:26
  Speaker 3: Yes, it's cleared up now. I must be getting along then,
• 39:30
  Speaker 3: or I shall have mister essin before I get back.
• 39:33
  Speaker 3: He hates it if I'm not there. Besides, I always
• 39:36
  Speaker 3: like to put on my neglige for dinner. Now, when
• 39:39
  Speaker 3: are you coming round to see me? I've got such
• 39:41
  Speaker 3: a lot of things to show you. We've got a
• 39:43
  Speaker 3: new side board in the dining room, very expensive it was,
• 39:47
  Speaker 3: but so handsome. Suppose you pop in tomorrow. I'd like to,
• 39:52
  Speaker 3: but I'm afraid I can't. You see, I don't leave baby,
• 39:55
  Speaker 3: not alone. Why can't leave the house. Oh, I never
• 40:00
  Speaker 3: go out unless Henry's at home. I always think a
• 40:04
  Speaker 3: baby must be an awful nuisance and such a tie.
• 40:08
  Speaker 3: But he's a great deer. Well, anyway, I'm glad I
• 40:12
  Speaker 3: haven't any I couldn't be bothered with them. Mister smithe
• 40:15
  Speaker 3: doesn't want any either. He says they make a woman
• 40:18
  Speaker 3: look so old too, having kids. Oh, and the expense
• 40:23
  Speaker 3: of them, Why you can be having no end of
• 40:25
  Speaker 3: a good time with the money they must cost. I
• 40:28
  Speaker 3: expect you find that, don't you. We have to cut
• 40:31
  Speaker 3: and contrive to make both ends meet, of course, But
• 40:34
  Speaker 3: he's a very happy, contented little fellow. We're just going
• 40:38
  Speaker 3: to get him a mail cart. But is it worth
• 40:41
  Speaker 3: all the trouble and expense? That's what I always look at.
• 40:45
  Speaker 3: Of Course, once it's there, there's nothing to be done
• 40:47
  Speaker 3: about it. You've just got to make the best of
• 40:49
  Speaker 3: a bad job. Well, there are two ways of looking
• 40:53
  Speaker 3: at it, maybe, But mister s he says, you know,
• 40:57
  Speaker 3: he'd rather have a kid's room than its company any day.
• 41:01
  Speaker 3: But you'd like to have one, wouldn't you? No, thank you,
• 41:05
  Speaker 3: it's not much in my line. I'm afraid i'm too modern,
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: you know. Oh well, now I really must be going.
• 41:12
  Speaker 3: Howbert will be in such a stew? Oh dear, here's
• 41:15
  Speaker 3: mister Thompson. Why whatever can the time be?
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: Enter Thompson nervously.
• 41:21
  Speaker 3: How d'ye do, mister Thompson. It isn't six yet, is it?
• 41:25
  Speaker 2: Yes? It is. It's struck as I was coming out
• 41:27
  Speaker 2: of the station. It'll be about ten.
• 41:30
  Speaker 1: Past now, Thompson looking at watch.
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: That's it? Just ten past?
• 41:36
  Speaker 3: Gracious? I must fly? Whatever? Will he say? Good bye?
• 41:40
  Speaker 3: Missus Thompson? Now mind you come round to see me?
• 41:43
  Speaker 3: Good bye? Good bye?
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: Missus Smyth exits, accompanied by Caroline Thomson. Fidgets around a
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: little helplessly. Eventually he settles down to take off his boots.
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: Missus Thompson returning.
• 41:57
  Speaker 3: I'm sorry, I haven't got the tea ready. I had
• 42:00
  Speaker 3: to stay and talk to missus smithe but I won't
• 42:02
  Speaker 3: be a minute.
• 42:04
  Speaker 2: That's all right, Carry dear, don't you worry. Won't you
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: give me a kiss? First?
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: Caroline kisses him.
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: I'll just get my slippers and have a bit of
• 42:13
  Speaker 2: a wash in the scullery.
• 42:15
  Speaker 1: Thompson goes out in his socks, carrying boots.
• 42:19
  Speaker 3: You might put the eggs on deer, will you? The
• 42:21
  Speaker 3: water will be boiling by now.
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: She goes to cupboard and proceeds to lay table. In
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: the middle of doing so, she stops and goes to
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: look at herself in the glass, then looks at her
• 42:32
  Speaker 1: clothes and sighs. Thompson returning, a's baby.
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: I'll just go and have a look at him.
• 42:39
  Speaker 3: Oh, don't go now, have your tea first. He's bound
• 42:43
  Speaker 3: to wake if you go up.
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: All right, dear, can I do anything?
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: No, I shan't be a second.
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: The tray's already, that's nice. I am angry. I didn't
• 42:54
  Speaker 2: get much lunch to day. I thought i'd wait and
• 42:56
  Speaker 2: have a good tea. It's so expensive. Every thing you
• 43:00
  Speaker 2: eat in town, they're not nearly so nice as what
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: you give me, missus.
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: Thompson exits and soon returns with drey. Thompson hurries to
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: take it from her.
• 43:09
  Speaker 3: Oh it's all right, Henry, don't you.
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: Bother missus Thompson setting things on table.
• 43:15
  Speaker 3: Come along, now whilst your eggs are hot.
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: She takes some sewing and sits by fire whilst Thompson
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: has his tea.
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: It has been wet in town to day. Have you
• 43:25
  Speaker 2: had much rain here?
• 43:27
  Speaker 3: Yes? It rained the whole morning nearly. I couldn't take
• 43:30
  Speaker 3: baby out, but mother took him this afternoon.
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: Oh, I ah, say, carry, this is wonderful good cham
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: is it what you made?
• 43:39
  Speaker 3: Yes, it's the last part.
• 43:41
  Speaker 2: How is it? I won't eat much of it? Then?
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: What have you been doing to day? Carry?
• 43:47
  Speaker 3: Oh? Just the usual scrubbing the kitchen and washing and ironing.
• 43:51
  Speaker 2: Oh, I know all those things of babies. You're such
• 43:55
  Speaker 2: a one for keeping him fine.
• 43:57
  Speaker 3: Oh yes, I like to see him as nice as
• 43:59
  Speaker 3: other peoples. But it does make a lot of work.
• 44:04
  Speaker 3: I suppose it's very wicked of me. But sometimes I
• 44:08
  Speaker 3: almost wish we hadn't him.
• 44:10
  Speaker 2: Wish we I didn't got baby, our baby. I'll carry No.
• 44:15
  Speaker 3: I don't mean that, really, not now he's here. What
• 44:19
  Speaker 3: I mean is if he'd never come at all, Well,
• 44:22
  Speaker 3: we couldn't miss him, then, could we. I mean, we
• 44:26
  Speaker 3: couldn't miss what we hadn't got. You have to work
• 44:28
  Speaker 3: so hard as.
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: It is, Oh, I don't mind a bit of work, but.
• 44:33
  Speaker 3: There'd be a little more to spend on other things.
• 44:36
  Speaker 3: We shouldn't always have to think and worry about every
• 44:39
  Speaker 3: penny as.
• 44:40
  Speaker 2: We do, and then we shouldn't have baby.
• 44:44
  Speaker 3: Besides, a woman gets to look so old and ugly
• 44:47
  Speaker 3: when she has children.
• 44:49
  Speaker 2: You couldn't look what you said, carry never.
• 44:53
  Speaker 3: Oh you're used to me.
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: You wouldn't notice, nor wouldn't any one. Why you look
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: younger and happy than you did two years ago when
• 45:01
  Speaker 2: we were married, years younger? Why mister Smithe was only
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: saying so this evening.
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: Missus Thompson greatly interested.
• 45:11
  Speaker 2: Oh, whenever did you see him in the train?
• 45:15
  Speaker 3: Did you travel back with him?
• 45:17
  Speaker 2: Yes? He came into my carriage on purpose to ask
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: after you.
• 45:21
  Speaker 3: Did he really?
• 45:23
  Speaker 2: I asked him to look us up some evening, and
• 45:25
  Speaker 2: he said he would. You asked him, Oh, yes, you'd
• 45:30
  Speaker 2: like to see him, wouldn't you carry You'd like him
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: to come round. He would liven us up a bit.
• 45:35
  Speaker 3: Oh, of course if he cares too, But I don't
• 45:38
  Speaker 3: suppose he will. They've got a very fine house, you know,
• 45:42
  Speaker 3: and the furniture inlaid Sheraton's style throughout. Oh I wasn't
• 45:48
  Speaker 3: that a nice dress she'd got on? Didn't you like it?
• 45:52
  Speaker 2: Suited her? All? Right?
• 45:54
  Speaker 3: It must be nice to have good clothes like that.
• 45:57
  Speaker 2: You know what I always think? Carry It's wonderful whatever
• 46:01
  Speaker 2: you've got on, you always look nice. You would not
• 46:05
  Speaker 2: like some women that have to be all dressed up
• 46:07
  Speaker 2: in frills and finery before they can show themselves. Why
• 46:11
  Speaker 2: even in that old dress? I always liked that one.
• 46:15
  Speaker 2: Why you look more the lady than missus smythe ever could?
• 46:19
  Speaker 3: Oh you're such a one. You never notice what women wear, Henry,
• 46:24
  Speaker 3: Now some people they know it once.
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: Sure you won't have any tea? Carry? No?
• 46:31
  Speaker 3: I had mine with mar at half past four?
• 46:34
  Speaker 2: How is she to day?
• 46:36
  Speaker 3: Oh? She's been quite bright? Done all the mending for me.
• 46:40
  Speaker 2: That's right. I'll take the paper when I go up.
• 46:43
  Speaker 2: Shall I take these things out?
• 46:46
  Speaker 3: Will you just put them on the copper?
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: Lar'd knock? Heard at the door?
• 46:51
  Speaker 3: Gracious? Who can that be?
• 46:54
  Speaker 2: I'll see?
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: Thomson exits.
• 46:58
  Speaker 3: It sounds like it sounds like, yes, I believe it
• 47:03
  Speaker 3: is missus.
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: Thompson hastily goes to glass and arranges her hair. Thompson
• 47:09
  Speaker 1: returns with Smith.
• 47:11
  Speaker 2: Good evening missus Henry Thompson.
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: Smith to Thompson, didn't.
• 47:18
  Speaker 2: Think I'll take you at your words so soon? Did you?
• 47:21
  Speaker 2: Neither did I? But we're very pleased. Well look here
• 47:26
  Speaker 2: now we'll all go home. Me and a missus we
• 47:29
  Speaker 2: had a little bit of a difference, and so I
• 47:32
  Speaker 2: just took me oak and here I am. I knew
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: it at maker mad if I come here.
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: Oh, mister Smith Smith standing back to Thompson, who clears
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: away to things.
• 47:44
  Speaker 2: Well, and how have you been going along? I've been
• 47:47
  Speaker 2: meaning to come and give you a look up for
• 47:49
  Speaker 2: a long time, but somehow there's always something more important
• 47:53
  Speaker 2: to be done, don't you know?
• 47:55
  Speaker 3: Oh?
• 47:55
  Speaker 2: Yes, of course, but it's a rummy thing. This evening.
• 48:00
  Speaker 2: I happened to get in the same compartments as your
• 48:02
  Speaker 2: good man, and as I hadn't got my paper, I
• 48:05
  Speaker 2: had to talk to him, and he said, when was
• 48:07
  Speaker 2: our coming along to see you? See?
• 48:10
  Speaker 3: Yes, he told me he'd asked you.
• 48:12
  Speaker 2: Then when I got home, tired as a dog after
• 48:15
  Speaker 2: me our day's work, not a soul in the place.
• 48:19
  Speaker 2: Missus out, skivvy out, fire out. She'd been gadding about
• 48:24
  Speaker 2: the old afternoon. And there you are, rather, where are
• 48:28
  Speaker 2: you when the cat's away, don't you know? So there's
• 48:31
  Speaker 2: no dinner ready for yours. Truly, I just waited till
• 48:35
  Speaker 2: she came in and told her what I thought. I
• 48:38
  Speaker 2: told her I wasn't going to stand no baling answers
• 48:41
  Speaker 2: like that. And then she said a few things, and
• 48:44
  Speaker 2: I replied in a few well chosen words, and then
• 48:47
  Speaker 2: I'll come out and bang the door. She was in
• 48:50
  Speaker 2: eye strikes by that time, of course. Oh these women
• 48:54
  Speaker 2: a Thompson what Thompson smiles feebly.
• 48:58
  Speaker 3: Oh but then, mister smif you can't have had anything
• 49:02
  Speaker 3: to eat, let me get you something. What would you like?
• 49:05
  Speaker 3: There's a tin of salmon in the house. Oh, Henry
• 49:08
  Speaker 3: could easily pop out and get you a chop or something,
• 49:11
  Speaker 3: and I'd cook it for you in no time.
• 49:13
  Speaker 2: On the gas lord, lover duck, bless you. Now, don't
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: you worry about me. I went straight round to the
• 49:21
  Speaker 2: King's head and got a snack there, So I'm all right.
• 49:25
  Speaker 2: Don't believe in neglecting the inner man. Ha ha. What
• 49:29
  Speaker 2: I say is, you can't afford to forget the commissariat departments.
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: Tell you what though? If you was to insist on it,
• 49:36
  Speaker 2: I could force myself to have a drink. I've got
• 49:39
  Speaker 2: a thirst on me. I wouldn't sell for a quid
• 49:42
  Speaker 2: salt beef it was they gave me at the pub.
• 49:45
  Speaker 2: I'm not so sure about the beef, but the salt
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: was there. All right, Well, what will you have?
• 49:51
  Speaker 3: There's some stout or I could make you a cup
• 49:53
  Speaker 3: of tea if you like.
• 49:55
  Speaker 2: No, thanks, no tea for yours? Truly a bottle of stout,
• 49:59
  Speaker 2: it's more my mark. I'll go and get it. Carry yes,
• 50:03
  Speaker 2: a bottless stout. Just what I could do.
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: With smile, lighting cigar.
• 50:09
  Speaker 2: Ah. This is a bit of all right. This is
• 50:12
  Speaker 2: what I call cozy glad I came here. I did
• 50:15
  Speaker 2: think of going into the Mitchells, but I didn't know
• 50:18
  Speaker 2: whether there'd be at home. And it's a dirty night too.
• 50:22
  Speaker 2: My missus said you'd been round here this afternoon. How'd
• 50:26
  Speaker 2: you get on with her?
• 50:27
  Speaker 3: Oh?
• 50:28
  Speaker 2: What a question, now, larks, how do you.
• 50:32
  Speaker 3: It's very kind of her to come and see me,
• 50:34
  Speaker 3: I think.
• 50:36
  Speaker 2: Do you know why she came?
• 50:38
  Speaker 3: Why?
• 50:39
  Speaker 2: Of course she's jealous, jealous of you, that's why, jealous
• 50:44
  Speaker 2: of me. Yes, you see, it's like this. I'm always
• 50:49
  Speaker 2: holding you up to her as what a wife ought
• 50:51
  Speaker 2: to be tumble. I'll tell her she ought to take
• 50:54
  Speaker 2: a lesson from you. From me, yes, I'll tell her
• 50:58
  Speaker 2: how careful and he can nomical and tidy and affectionate
• 51:02
  Speaker 2: than all that you are. I never And then she
• 51:06
  Speaker 2: wants to know I know, especially about the affectionateness.
• 51:11
  Speaker 3: Oh, mister smithe how can you?
• 51:14
  Speaker 1: Thomson returns with two bottles of start and a glass,
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: which he puts on the table.
• 51:19
  Speaker 2: There is no only these two? Is they carry?
• 51:22
  Speaker 3: No? That's all?
• 51:23
  Speaker 2: Oh, well, that'll do a one for yours truly, ha ha.
• 51:28
  Speaker 1: Smith getting up.
• 51:30
  Speaker 2: I say, you do go it? You know you people?
• 51:33
  Speaker 2: Two old bottles are stout in your cellar. Eh oh,
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: we don't often have it, but the doctor said it
• 51:40
  Speaker 2: would do carry good. You don't care very much, though,
• 51:43
  Speaker 2: do you dear? No? I hate it bitter like that
• 51:47
  Speaker 2: is for me? Ain't it? Well? Here's a catching of
• 51:50
  Speaker 2: your eye? Happy days?
• 51:52
  Speaker 1: Smith wintered missus Thompson and empties his glass.
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: Ah that's good, lord, I was dry.
• 52:00
  Speaker 3: Won't you have a biscuit with it?
• 52:03
  Speaker 2: No? Thanks? Not when I'm smoking here, I say, Thompson,
• 52:07
  Speaker 2: I'll give you a cigar? Can you smoke one.
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: Smile, takes out case and carefully selects one.
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: There there you are, thank you, thank you very much.
• 52:20
  Speaker 2: Got a light on.
• 52:21
  Speaker 3: The mantel piece.
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: Henry Thompson gets a box of matches and tries, with
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: difficulty to light cigar. Smithe much amused, nudges Missus Thompson
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: at last bursts out laughing. Thompson, confused, looks at him.
• 52:36
  Speaker 2: Oh, I say, look at him, look at him. Don't
• 52:41
  Speaker 2: use up hole of matches, old chap. It isn't bonfire night.
• 52:46
  Speaker 2: Oh there he goes again. Oh, look at him. Ha ha.
• 52:50
  Speaker 2: It won't light. Oh, he says, it won't light. Ah,
• 52:55
  Speaker 2: he says it won't light. Try again, old cock. Stick
• 52:59
  Speaker 2: to it. That's right. Are we downhearted now? Ha ha ha,
• 53:06
  Speaker 2: But it's no good. It won't light.
• 53:09
  Speaker 3: Have you pit the end off?
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: Henry smile to Missus Thompson facetiously as.
• 53:15
  Speaker 2: He bit the end off, as he bit the end
• 53:19
  Speaker 2: of Oh, law, oh, law, hey, yeah, leave off, leave off,
• 53:24
  Speaker 2: dear Peter, death of me. You will stow it for
• 53:27
  Speaker 2: heaven's sake. I think there must be something the matter
• 53:30
  Speaker 2: with it. Oh, something the matter with it? Pee god?
• 53:36
  Speaker 1: Oh smile wiping his eyes.
• 53:41
  Speaker 2: Just do you have a good look at it?
• 53:44
  Speaker 1: Thompson, smiling feebly.
• 53:46
  Speaker 2: It's an imitation one, any imitation one. Oh law, Oh dear,
• 53:54
  Speaker 2: oh dear, oh law. I never came across such a
• 53:58
  Speaker 2: bally expert as you are. I'll never worked that joke
• 54:01
  Speaker 2: so well afore, although I had lots of fun with
• 54:04
  Speaker 2: it on the exchange, I wasn't he funny? Oh dear,
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: oh dear, I never laughed so much in all me life. Here,
• 54:14
  Speaker 2: let's have it back. I can't give it to here,
• 54:16
  Speaker 2: you know I want that again. Here. I'll give you
• 54:19
  Speaker 2: a real one now, No, thank you. I don't think
• 54:23
  Speaker 2: I want one. I'd as soon have a fag.
• 54:27
  Speaker 1: Thompson produces packet of cigarettes and lights one.
• 54:31
  Speaker 2: He ten't trust me again. He's an artful dog, he is.
• 54:35
  Speaker 2: I'll have another drink after that, You funny devil.
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: You smithe playfully punching Thompson. Smith pours out another glass
• 54:44
  Speaker 1: of starch, which he puts on the mantel piece by
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: his side and settles down in Arm't you to missus, Thompson?
• 54:50
  Speaker 2: What's that you're doing? Another little stranger? Eh?
• 54:54
  Speaker 3: It's a pinafore for baby?
• 54:57
  Speaker 2: Oh a Pinafore for baby is what was it like?
• 55:01
  Speaker 2: Take after its father? Now? He's the very image of
• 55:05
  Speaker 2: carry just her eyes? Would you like to see him?
• 55:08
  Speaker 2: I'll bring him down. Well, if it's all the same
• 55:11
  Speaker 2: to you, I'd rather be excused. I'm not much of
• 55:15
  Speaker 2: a family man, don't you know. Besides, Kit's always slobber.
• 55:19
  Speaker 2: So have you been up to see him? Carry since tea?
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: Missus Thompson looking at clock.
• 55:26
  Speaker 2: No, but I ought to go now, now, don't you.
• 55:30
  Speaker 2: I'll go. You stop and talk to mister smythe I
• 55:33
  Speaker 2: can look after baby all right. You sit still. I'll
• 55:36
  Speaker 2: call you if he wants you.
• 55:39
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 55:39
  Speaker 1: Henry Thompson exits, I'm go.
• 55:43
  Speaker 2: Ain't it to think if you married and a baby
• 55:46
  Speaker 2: and all? Ah? How do you like it? Come up
• 55:48
  Speaker 2: to your expectations?
• 55:50
  Speaker 3: Henry is very good to me.
• 55:53
  Speaker 2: So we ought to be. Ain't everyone who gets a
• 55:55
  Speaker 2: wife like you, who looks after her husband like you do,
• 55:59
  Speaker 2: who's skim and plan and always manage to be cheerful
• 56:02
  Speaker 2: and good tempered.
• 56:04
  Speaker 3: I love looking after people and trying to make them comfortable.
• 56:08
  Speaker 2: Yes, you always did. I'll say that for you. Now
• 56:12
  Speaker 2: my wife she is quite different.
• 56:14
  Speaker 3: Oh but I'm sure she's very fond of you.
• 56:18
  Speaker 2: My wife's fond of one person in this world, and
• 56:21
  Speaker 2: that's herself. See, that's the only person she's really fond of,
• 56:26
  Speaker 2: number one.
• 56:27
  Speaker 3: But she thinks so much of you.
• 56:29
  Speaker 2: That's so she ought to here. Am I slaving away
• 56:33
  Speaker 2: all day and what for? Just to keep her in
• 56:36
  Speaker 2: luxury while she does absolutely lutely nothing? And then when
• 56:41
  Speaker 2: I come home she grumbles all the time, scarcely travels
• 56:45
  Speaker 2: to keep a civil tongue in her head except before company.
• 56:48
  Speaker 2: Look at tonight too.
• 56:50
  Speaker 3: Perhaps she thought the servant would be there to look
• 56:53
  Speaker 3: after you.
• 56:54
  Speaker 2: Was She'd no right to think that. Isn't her business.
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: Her business is to look after her husband and make
• 57:00
  Speaker 2: him comfortable, same as you do. I bet you're never
• 57:04
  Speaker 2: gadding about when he comes home at night.
• 57:07
  Speaker 3: Well I couldn't leave him to look after himself, could I?
• 57:11
  Speaker 2: You couldn't Some people could, though, smiled, drinking. Oh well,
• 57:17
  Speaker 2: I didn't come here to talk about my matrimonial grievances.
• 57:21
  Speaker 2: I'll come to see you, And you haven't once said
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: you were glad to see me?
• 57:26
  Speaker 3: What nonsense? Why of course I'm glad. I think it
• 57:29
  Speaker 3: was so kind of you to come.
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: You know you don't look a day older than that
• 57:34
  Speaker 2: night when I came here and told you I was
• 57:36
  Speaker 2: going to be married. Do you remember you and your sister,
• 57:40
  Speaker 2: both of you. You were so fanny about it, And
• 57:43
  Speaker 2: then the next I hear is that you're both engaged.
• 57:46
  Speaker 2: Must have been catching you know, carry It was a
• 57:49
  Speaker 2: near thing. I turned it over in my mind lots
• 57:52
  Speaker 2: of times, whether it was to be one of you
• 57:55
  Speaker 2: or Rose. Course I didn't say anything, but it's one
• 57:59
  Speaker 2: of those things, you know, know what you ought to
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: have done till you've done the other thing?
• 58:04
  Speaker 3: Whatever? Do you mean?
• 58:06
  Speaker 2: What I mean is this? I ought never to have
• 58:09
  Speaker 2: married Rose. You're a girl I ought to have married.
• 58:12
  Speaker 2: You'd maybe much more comfortable.
• 58:15
  Speaker 3: Oh you mustn't talk like that, mister Smith.
• 58:18
  Speaker 2: Why not? What's the arm? It's true you're a girl
• 58:22
  Speaker 2: I ought to have married.
• 58:24
  Speaker 3: I wish you wouldn't say such things.
• 58:26
  Speaker 2: Ah, wish I wouldn't say such things? Do you? Now?
• 58:30
  Speaker 2: Don't you be silly? You know you were dying for
• 58:33
  Speaker 2: me to ask you. You only married him as a makeshift.
• 58:36
  Speaker 2: Think I didn't know?
• 58:38
  Speaker 1: Lord?
• 58:39
  Speaker 2: Bless you? Aren't you all the time? You wouldn't have
• 58:42
  Speaker 2: married a man like that, if you could have got.
• 58:44
  Speaker 1: Me, Missus Thompson moving away.
• 58:48
  Speaker 2: You mustn't say that, so would any woman with apeth
• 58:52
  Speaker 2: a sense. Look at the nice house. We've got new
• 58:55
  Speaker 2: furniture and everything, and a servant and a bit to
• 58:58
  Speaker 2: spend on a music or whenever you like. Anyway, it's
• 59:02
  Speaker 2: a cut above this. I reckon.
• 59:04
  Speaker 3: Henry gives me all he's got. He can't do more.
• 59:08
  Speaker 2: Yes, but look at him. He isn't awf awake. He's
• 59:12
  Speaker 2: like a great girl. Anyone could knock the stuffing out
• 59:15
  Speaker 2: of him left handed.
• 59:17
  Speaker 3: He's very good.
• 59:19
  Speaker 2: So are lots of other damn fools.
• 59:22
  Speaker 1: Missus Thompson getting up rather frightened.
• 59:25
  Speaker 3: It's very wrong of you to say things like that. Besides,
• 59:29
  Speaker 3: it isn't true.
• 59:31
  Speaker 2: Beginning to cry now then now, then what are you
• 59:35
  Speaker 2: owlan about? You know jolly well you'd rather have married me.
• 59:39
  Speaker 2: Don't pretend you wouldn't, see you, silly girl.
• 59:42
  Speaker 1: You smiles, putting his arm around her.
• 59:47
  Speaker 3: Oh, don't touch me. You've you've been drinking?
• 59:51
  Speaker 2: Well, what of it? Do you good too? To have
• 59:54
  Speaker 2: a drop or something warm the cockles of your heart? Here? Ever,
• 59:57
  Speaker 2: drop out of Mark.
• 59:58
  Speaker 1: Glass Smith holds glass to her mouth.
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 3: Don't don't do that. I don't like it. I won't.
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 2: Oh yes, but you will. Now come now, none o
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 2: your shenanikin be matey. Now have a drink.
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 3: No, I won't. I tell you, I won't.
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 1: Slight struggle, glass falls on floor.
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 2: There say what you've done? That's your fault, that is
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 2: Henry Labsandina say about that, mucking up his nice new carpet,
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 2: you little spitfire you.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 3: You shouldn't have behaved like that.
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 2: You no gentleman, No gentleman, ain't I no gentleman. All right,
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 2: then I'll show you.
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 1: Smith catches hold of her.
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 2: Now you've got to pay for having said that. You've
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 2: got to give me a kiss for that.
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 3: They struggle, Oh, don't get away, leave off? I tell you,
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 3: how dare you?
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 1: Door opens and Thompson enters realize the situation. Henry Henry
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: Thompson rushes that smiled the wristle panting Smithe is thrown down.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 2: Hey yeah, that'll be a fool. What you doing, you
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 2: walking scarecrow? You damn you, you blasted idiot. More in
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 2: me a bat? What do you think you're up to?
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: Looking after my wife? That's what I'm up to and
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 2: maybe a walking scarecrow. I mayn't have your fine talk
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 2: and ways. I'm not much company. I'm just a poor
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 2: dog chap. But my wife is my wife to be
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 2: looked after and taken care of. She's so much above me,
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 2: so much better and cleverer and all that. I can
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 2: only love her and be grateful to her for marrying
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 2: a poor fellow like me. And what's more, I thank
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 2: and praise God for her every minute of my life.
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 2: That's only one thing I can do for her. I
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 2: can love her like a dog, and I can protect
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 2: her like a dog. I'll give my life tomorrow for her. No,
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 2: I'm not nearly good enough. She ought to have married
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 2: somebody much better, with money to spend on her, somebody
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 2: clever for her to be proud of. But she did
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 2: marry me. I'm her husband. That's so long as I am.
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna look after her, so help me. God. Now
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 2: you get out, and don't ever you show your face
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 2: here again or where I'm jiggered.
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 1: Smile goes out, trying to rearrange his clothes. Thompson stands
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 1: watching him off. The outer door slams, then he turns
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 1: round and looks at Caroline, who is standing by mantelpiece,
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: her head hidden in her hands. His late dominant manner
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 1: falls from him, and he again looks meek and humble.
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 2: Carry, Yes, are you? Are you angry with me? Carry?
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 3: Angry?
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 2: I don't know what it was, but something seemed to
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 2: get hold of me. I didn't mean to say what
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 2: I did. I always knew you liked him, and I
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 2: was so glad for you to see him and talk
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 2: to him. He's more entertaining than what I am. You see,
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 2: I always felt it was so good of you to
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 2: marry me, and I know I oughtn't to have behaved
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 2: like I did to any one you cared about. I
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 2: don't know how I did it. Something seemed a force
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 2: in me. I hope you'll forgive me.
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 3: Carry dear, Oh, Henry, Henry, how wonderful you are. I've
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 3: never known you till now, not really.
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 1: She falls, sobbing on his shoulder. Curtain end of Realities,
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 1: end of Makeshifts and Realities by Gertrude Robbins