Latest / The You Project / #1990 Strategic 'Friends' Or Actual Friends? - Kelly & Harps

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#1990 Strategic 'Friends' Or Actual Friends? - Kelly & Harps · The You Project

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I'll get a team. It's Harps, it's Kelly. It's me
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: with the Barry White, A little bit of Barry White
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: going on in the middle of something that's circulating in
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: my upper body, chest region, nose region, bloody sinus region.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: I've got about four lower octaves are going on right now, Kelly,
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: as you can hear. What are your thoughts? Do you
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: should I keep it?
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: I mean, look, I'm sure there's people out there that
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: are very impressed by this vocal range.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: At gosh, I can't. I don't really have an option.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: That's just all I've got at the minute. But it's
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: it is what it is. I think there's a few
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: people getting around with a little bit of influenza A
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: through to Z, so I've got something, but hopefully I'm
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: on the end.
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: Hopefully.
• 0:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: Actually I sent two for a message to see if
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: she'd be in on this, and she said that she's
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: been knocked out with the same thing as well, so
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: going around.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, a lot of people have got it, a lot
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: of people. I think it's like, I'm not too bad.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: Like some people are absolutely smashed and don't get out
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: of bed for a week, and they literally find it
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: hard to get up and go have a wheel or
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: get a drink of water or something. So I'm not
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: in that category, which is good. So but you just
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: do what you can.
• 1:21
  Speaker 3: Know.
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: You sold, your on, sold, You're on. Yeah, all right,
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: Well we're having a chat. And when I say we're
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: having a chat, you're leading the way as you do.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: You're heading off soon, you're going away. We won't say
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: where unless you want to say where. But you're off
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: for a bit of a break. So this is you
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: one last hurrah before your head off into the blue yonder.
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, one last conversation before I jump on a plane
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: this evening actually, so I'm a bit excited about that.
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: But what I've been listening to recently, I've been down
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: the Simon sink rabbit hole, and I think he's a
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: bit great. And he and look, obviously a lot of
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: people in the world think is a bit great.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: It's pretty cool, and he.
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: Has raised this question about friendship, and obviously, with him
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: being incredibly wise and with you being incredibly wise, I
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: wanted to get your opinion on it. And it seems
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: that within a lot of self help educational self development spaces,
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: there's a lot around working on yourself in terms of
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: being a leader, in terms of being a partner, But
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: there's nothing out there about how do you be a
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: better friend to someone? Because you've got this huge element
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: to your life that can be incredibly intimate because you
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: know people for decades and they see many different versions
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: of you, and if you're really lucky, you've got some
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: that's stick with you through all of those versions. But
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: do we ever stop and kind of go, how can
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: I be better in that space? How can I be
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: a better friend to my friends?
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a great question. I think being being a
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: good friend is its work as well as its joy,
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: and it's fun and there's an upside, but there's also
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: I think there are this sounds a little too strategic,
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: but boxes that need to be ticked in that you know,
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: you need to do work because you've got to support people.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: But I also think sometimes being a friend is or
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: it can be complicated. If you're the kind of friend
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: that wants to see people really grow, learn, evolve, be happy,
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: be fulfilled, you know all of those things that we
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: talk about in the personal development space, but also where
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: people so we never want to tell them anything that
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: isn't positive, right, And so that can be a dichotomy
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: because when you only tell people what they want to hear,
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: or what you're comfortable to say, or what's going to
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: make them feel seen, value, loved, all of that. I
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: get all of that, But what if it's not true?
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: What if you're telling them they're amazing when maybe on
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: this day they're not amazing? What if they're being a
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: dickhead today? And that's that's how do you navigate that?
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: How do you be how do you be thoughtful and
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: compassionate and empathetic but also real and honest, because, as
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: I've said many times before, you know, people want feedback
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: until they get feedback that I don't want. So so
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: with my friends, if they go what do you you
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: know I'm doing this or that? What do you think?
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: Or I go, okay, do you actually want to know
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: what I think? Or do you want me to tell
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: you that what you're doing is great?
• 4:54
  Speaker 3: And then they get this look on their face like,
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: oh God, what opened this door? And I'll always try
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: to preface it if I think something that is maybe
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: not what they want to hear, I'll always try and
• 5:05
  Speaker 3: preface it with something genuinely positive that I think, but
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: my obviously My role with my friends is to be
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: their friend and first, first and foremost. But also perhaps with.
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: My friends, they maybe come to me for guidance more
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: than they would the average friend, because I spend a
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: lot of my life, for better or worse, handing out,
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: you know, kind of direction and feedback and advice, and
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: that for me has got to be It's got to
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: be part of the deal to an extent, because otherwise
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: you're just a fan club. And sometimes that's not healthy
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: for them or you, and sometimes it's not founded in
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: an accurate representation of what's really going on. So I
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: think friendship can be. I don't think friendship is telling
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: them what they want to hear or being supportive no
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: matter what. I would not I if you and I, well,
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: you and I are friends, but if I was doing
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: something that you truly thought was a moral or bad
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: behavior or inappropriate and you said to me that, you said,
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: can I talk to you for a moment, and you went,
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: listen that thing that you're doing. You may or may
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: not want to hear this, but my opinion is that
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: now I know that you wouldn't. You probably wouldn't do
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: that to me, but I would be okay, with that.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: And also I would know that if you and I
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: were close. We're quite good friends, but we haven't spent
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: heaps of time together, but we know each other pretty well.
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: But I know that if you came up to me
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: and said something, I would really pay attention because you
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: never do that. Yeah, And I'd think, oh, this must
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: be significant. I must really not be seeing something. If
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: Kelly's coming up to me and going, hey, listen, jumbo,
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: I can pay attention for a moment. This is something
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: that I think might be you may or may not
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: be aware of, but I think you need to hear. Yeah.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: And I and of course just you know, for the
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: most part, loving people and understanding people and not trying
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: to judge them. And I never all right, I'm going
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: to say I extremely rarely give advice and I mean hardly.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: Ever that hasn't been sought yep. You know. So if
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: somebody's doing something, unless I think they're going to hurt
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: themselves or hurt someone else, if they haven't asked me
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: what I think, I will not just offer it up.
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: I used to, and I used to get myself in
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: trouble because I was stupid, because I but my intentions
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: were good. Remember, you know, they'll false consensus effect, like
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: I think they think like me, and like my intentions
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: were good. I genuinely it wasn't a critical analysis or judgment.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: It was just like I thought, Oh, he's going to
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: fuck himself up? Is he always going to fuck up
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: his marriage? Or he's going to fuck up his shoulder
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: in the gym? Or And sometimes it was well received
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: and sometimes it almost ended a friendship. And but I
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: will say that I was probably the problem in that
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: in that it although it may have been true or not,
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: it was always well intended. But you can't teach someone
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: something that doesn't want to be taught. And it's up
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: to me to have enough awareness and discernment around that. Yeah.
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: But also, and I'll shut up after this, I reckon,
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: if you've got five people who just love the shit
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: out of you, like I've said many times, and they
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: love you, you know, it doesn't mean they'd put up
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: with anything, but they love you, and they're you know,
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: if you fuck up, and if you if you end
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: up on the you know, on the street, and you've
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: got no doe and you've got you've made a thousand mistakes,
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: you know, unless it's something you know, unforgivable. Then I'm
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: always going to be there for those people in my
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: life that have that place in my life.
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Absolutely. Do you think well in terms of being
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: able to be that honest with friends, because there is
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: that as much as there's relationships some people might have
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: with their partners that they're intimate and so therefore it's
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: almost like all bets are off. You can say whatever
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: and there's a amount of forgiveness. Is do you find
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: it's a length of time in the friendship or sometimes
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: you know, you just meet people that you absolutely click
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: with and it doesn't matter about the length of time
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: because you're so in tune with each other that you
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: can say whatever needs to be said.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's great. So I think there's those two and
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: one more so, how well bonded you are and how
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: well you know each other, how well you understand each other,
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: how well you're connected, how well you trust each other
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: with your words and feedback, how long you've known each other.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: May it's definitely a variable and a factor. But there's
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: some people that I've known for twenty years and we've
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: never had a deep and meaningful but I've known him
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: for twenty years. All right. In fact, one of my friends,
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: his name is Dino. He's a builder turned firefighter, and
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: I saw him this morning. Shout out to Dino, and
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: he himself says like he's I can't say what he
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: calls himself because it's highly offensive, but you can imagine.
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: But let's just say that he's not overtly empathetic or
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: aware or demonstrative or you know, like all of my
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: like my mates, I'll hug all of my mates. The
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: crab won't have a bar of it. Dino won't have
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: a bar of it, Like I'm a fucking hugger, bring
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: it in. But I know that about them, so I
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: don't try and hug them. But I think there's that,
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: and then I think there's like some people are just
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: why that way where they are more likely to take
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: feedback and less likely to get offended than others. So
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: it's a more and maybe one thing. It depends on context.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: It's like if I which I wouldn't, but if I
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: bumped into Joe Rogan and he said, made I've listened
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: to a few of your shows. Do you want some feedback,
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: I'd go, fuck yes, master, and I'd sit at his
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: feet like a fucking puppy and write notes because it's
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: Joe Rogan. Yeah, but if you came up to me
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: and said, listen, Champ, I got a few tips for you,
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: I might be less engaged, you know. So I think
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: it's situational and it's context driven. Who's giving me the
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: advice and feedback and do I respect them in the
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: context of the advice that's being dispensed. You know, don't
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: come to me for fashion tips because I'm a fucking idiot.
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: But if you want to know how to do a
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: decent workout, or you want to know how to maybe
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: perform under pressure or something, I may or may not
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: be of value. But yeah, there's certain things nobody should
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: come to me for, you know, on advice for Yeah.
• 11:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, So how old or when did you become and
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: maybe you are, maybe you aren't, But when did you
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: become comfortable with receiving genuine feedback from people who you
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: actually value it and trust it from.
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: I would say I'm still a work in progress, but
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: I think it's you know, you can't be objective about
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: you because you're you, right, But I think probably in
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: my early thirties, but I think, you know, when I
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: really started to go down me. What's it like being
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: around me? What is this this thing that Kelly or
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: I and Kelly and I are in the middle of
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: right now, What is this conversation? What is this moment
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: in time? What is this experience for Kelly? What is
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: it for me? And it's not the same. So trying
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: to understand where people were coming from and their intention
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: and all of that, and you can I think there's
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: an energy that comes with people who are just being
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: pricks versus people who care about you, And you can
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: see that they're trying to clumsily share something because they
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: don't want to hurt you and they don't want you
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: to hate them, and they don't want to create any tension.
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: And I will say, it's whatever it is, It's okay,
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: whatever it is. And maybe I won't agree with you,
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: maybe I will. Maybe you will bloody turn on a
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: light in my brain and I'll go, oh my god,
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: thank you for sharing. But I've told this a couple
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: of times. But early on in the You project, a
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: lady that I don't know sent me an email and said, Hey,
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: love the show, love you. You're great, except you talk
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: over the top of guests and you know sometimes it
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: seems like you don't listen, which second bit bothered me
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: a bit, but I thought, well, maybe I don't enough,
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: and I went back listened and I did talk over
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: guests at times, and so essentially everything she said was
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: either totally true or partially true, and there are a
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: few other things. And when I was reading it, I
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: was like, I wasn't angry else that was just a
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: little bit like who the fuck is this? And then
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: I went, yeah, that's cool. That's your ego, that's your fear,
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: that's your bullshit. So is it true though? Like is
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: it true though? And it was true. So I wrote
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: back to her and I kind of said, you know,
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: dear whatever, Donna, thanks for your feedback. And I took
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: time and I went, this has been interesting for me
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: because when I read your email, I kind of didn't
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: want to read it. I didn't want to read it,
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: you know, And once I'd read it, I wish I
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: could unread it and all that stuff and which was
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: my bullshit. But then when I got over my little
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: thirty second, you know, in a tantrum, and the reason
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: I had a little in the tantrum because you were
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: so fucking you knew me, like, you just called out
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: me and everything you said was either completely true or
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: mostly true. Up, So thanks, So thanks. That's it. So
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: I am going to take your feedback on board. I
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: actually agree with you. I'm going to do well. I'm
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: going to do my best to do better. So thanks
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: for you. And she wrote the nicest thing back and
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: she goes, this is why I love you, not love you,
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: love you, but this is why I love you. And
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: I went thanks. You know, She's like, because most people
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: wouldn't read that. If they did read it, they discard it.
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: You thought about it, and I did, you know, and
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: I try to do that, which is not to say
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: this is one of the i'veset it many times. This
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: is one of the toughest things about the understanding, you know,
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: the journey of understanding the self in the middle of
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: your life. You your mind, your actions, reactions, behavior, choices, biases, theories, ideas.
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: You know, because you want to think your ace, you
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: want to think you're right. You don't want to think
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: that that person that pointed out some flaws is wrong.
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: You know. I know some people are at the other
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: end of the I'm a piece of shit scale. I
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: know they're right down there as well, But for the
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: most part, people don't like any feedback unless it's positive.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: But I think it's really about how it's shared and
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: how it's processed. And like I say all the time too,
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: I do you know I make I don't know how many,
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: but if I'm not making at least one to five
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: mistakes a day on average, I would be very very surprised.
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm very much in the space at the moment
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: of asking for feedback. I'm in a very tentative way,
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: so asking people who I do trust, whose opinions I
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: do value. I showed a friend the other day a
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: clip from the episode I did with Tiff, and you know,
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: it was kind of like, hey, look at me, isn't
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: this really cool? And she looks at me and she goes,
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: why the fuck aren't you bringing this to me rather
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: than the version that I see of you? And I
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: went yeah, and I went, oh, okay, And so we
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: had further conversations on it, and I said, is there
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: anything else you can tell me? Because the biggest thing
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: for me at the moment is to be in alignment,
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: or at least working towards being in alignment, and the
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: fact that I can have these wonderful conversations with Craig
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: and with Tiff, that's what I want more of. And
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: we had this wonderful conversation about it, and she's like,
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: just be you, you know, bring more of that, Bring
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: more of what you're learning and what you're interested in.
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: And it was so valuable and it was so I
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: don't even have the word for it. It just it
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: meant so much that we could have such an honest conversation.
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: But immediately for her to go bring that version instead
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: of what I'm seeing, it was like, oh, wow, Okay,
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: that's incredible.
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, And what do you think that's about? Because
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: it's funny because I would think, as she a good friend,
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: very good I would think around her, you'd be the
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: most real version of yourself, which is not say you're
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: a fake on the potty, but you'd be like, if
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: I'm thinking, where is she going to be more fearful
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: and more filtered, it's going to be on the podcast
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: than just chatting with your mate. So what's that about? Yeah,
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: good question.
• 18:29
  Speaker 3: I think.
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: Probably different versions of being vulnerable. So we have gone
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: through a lot together and we can be quite raw
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: and unfiltered and have conversations on those levels, and that's
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: probably almost an older version or a past version of
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: where I've been, right, and she knows very much where
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: I want to go, So I think there's a bit
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: of encouragement of you know, it's okay to step out
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: of that and step into this. So it's kind of
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: a transition phase, I guess.
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it is interesting when you're an introvert playing in
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: an extroverts world, you know, which is what you're kind
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: of doing, which is not say everyone who has a
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: podcast is an extrovert, but there ain't too many who
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: are not, or at least an ambivert, you know, which
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: is that. Have you heard that term?
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: I have?
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you know, somewhere in the middle. But but
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: I think also, like people would never believe this, but
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: I am. I am closer to the introvert than the
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: extrovert end of the scale, because yeah, I have no
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: need for attention. You know, if I'm at a party,
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: if I'm at a dinner, if i'm unless I'm there
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: to do something where I have to stand up, and
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: I'm comfortable and okay to stand up and do the thing.
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: But if I'm not there to you know, give a
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: speech or announce something or fucking MC or whatever. There's
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: nothing in me that wants to get up and talk. Nothing.
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: There's nothing in me that wants to be the loud
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: one at the table. Yeah, nothing, there's nothing. You know.
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: It's like I live by myself. I spend I would
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: say on average, I spend twenty two hours a day
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: by myself every day because I don't work at a
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: you know, I work at home. I study research at home.
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: You know, I see people in the morning coincidentally when
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: I have breakfast or if I'm meeting someone. You know,
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: I'm in terms of face to face people, Yeah, probably
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: two hours or less a day, and then I do
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: one or two of these a day. So there's a
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: bit of that. But but I'm so comfortable, like I'm
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: so comfortable not being around people, which is not to
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: say I dislike being around people. But I think you
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: can you can develop that skill and that kind of
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: type of awareness that you are a little bit different
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: around you know, in this capacity, I think I'm you know,
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: I often get told you're exactly the same, Like when
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: people meet me, oh god, you're exactly the same. Yeah,
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: might still say fucking cock and I'm still you know,
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: a dickhead, and I'm still trying to make you laugh,
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: and I'm still needy and I'm all of that right.
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: But like you and I were talking before we came
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: on LIVEE, and you know, I've been crooked and honestly
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: feel about a three out of ten today, and I said, well,
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: I'm about to switch into an eight because nobody wants
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: a fucking three out of ten podcast host, so you know,
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: so that's me. And what is interesting is I don't
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: feel like a three anymore, by the way. I feel
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: like a five or six now. But also, if your
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: job is to, you know, talk to thousands of people
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: and hopefully inform, inspire, educate, maybe make laugh, well I
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: think it's I think it's in your interest to not pretend,
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: but to turn up the energy as much as you
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: can so that this is a good experience for people.
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: I don't want to get on here and say listen,
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: you know, hi, everyone feeling a bit rubbish, got a
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: couple of things going on. I'm a bit tired, so
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: today will be it'll be pretty shit. There'll be some
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: good ideas and stuff, but my energy is going to
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: be fucked. So if you're okay with that. You know,
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: if you want keep listening. But you know, you know,
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: if you don't want to, I get it. I don't
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: even want to be here, you know what I mean.
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: No one's it's like, well, of course you're fucking idiot,
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: you know, get up, do your job. I can't turn
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: up for a corporate gig and go I didn't sleep
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: well last night, so I know you're paying XXX, but
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: I'm only going to give you X value because it's
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: all about me. Like there are times when you have
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: a responsibility not to pretend but to go well, literally
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: my job but for this hour or two is to
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: you know, whether or not it's on a podcast or
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: in a gig, is to inspire and inform and educate
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: and build connection and poor and give people an experience
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: that they enjoy being in the middle of. So you
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: kind of got to put your bullshit aside for a moment,
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: do what you need to do, and then go and
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: fucking lie on the floor and have a little snooze
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: whatever you need to do.
• 23:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I wanted to before when you were talking about
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: introvert versus extrovert, you actually said you don't need the attention,
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: which I thought was a really wonderful way of reframing
• 23:37
  Speaker 2: when a lot of people, particularly introverts, would lean more
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: towards they don't want the attention. And that's the position
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: that I've very much come from, Like, no, don't even
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: look my way because I won't know how to string
• 23:52
  Speaker 2: two words together if it's in person.
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: Yes, But to.
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: Say that you don't need the attention, I feel like
• 23:59
  Speaker 2: that's completely different because there's no discomfort around that.
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, well, I mean honestly, some people might not
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: believe this, but I don't. I still have, you know,
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: all that stuff, all the emotional stuff, imposter syndrome and
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: all that, and when I'm really good with getting nice feedback,
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: but then when it's over the top, I'm like, nah,
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: that's that's too much. I get uncomfortable. But like, for example,
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: when I go away wherever to Perth or you know,
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: Goldie or wherever and interstate, and I'm away for a
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: couple of days or even three days, depending on what
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: I'm doing, and the only time I'm in front of
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: people or talking to people is when i'm actually doing
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: the work. But I might be there for seventy two
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: hours and in seventy two hours I might have four
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: hours of work depending on what my schedule is. Right.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: I love those trips. I love those trips because nobody
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: not that I'm anybody special, but like I wherever I go,
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: nobody knows me. You know, every now and then someone
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: goes is that you harps you know, oh, longtime listener,
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: first time caller, you know all that, and it's great
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: and I'm very appreciative and humbled and all of that.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: And I'll you know, talk to them and give them
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: a harg if they want one, and take a selfie
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: if they want one, and all that stuff that I
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: don't know why on earth anyone would want a selfie
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: with me, but they do, and all that stuff's great.
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: But yeah, there's no if that was out of my life,
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't miss that, like all the you know, the
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: attention stuff like I'm you know, but yeah, I enjoy it.
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: But I'm more like I had to do a gig
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: the other day for it doesn't matter. But it was
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: at the Junction Oval here in Victoria, which is the
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: home of cricket Victoria to talk for two and a
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: half hours to this big group of leaders and I
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: got paid really well. That don't matter in a minute
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: when I blame what happened. So I got up and
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: I've got I've got some issues at the moment with
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: my U station tubes and hearing and ear blocking. And
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: it's like, honestly and yeah, I think you know, I
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: never took, but it's fucking hard because sometimes both of
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: my ears block. So I got up to talk and
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: I was talking from nine till after eleven, and both
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: of my double ear block happened five minutes to nine,
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: and I'm talking at nine. So what happens is you
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: hear your voice booming in your head. It's like literally,
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: you've got I don't know, your ears plugged up with
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: like I don't know, chewing gum or something, thirty seven pieces.
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: Then someone's taped gaffer tape over your ears, and then
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: they've put sauce pans on your ears, right so you
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: can't really hear what people are saying. It's quite muffled.
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: But also at the sime, like if that was happening
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: right now, which it's not, I can just sit and
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: be still, and I can tell you my heart rate
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: because I can hear my heart in my head. I
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: can hear my heart beating quite loud in my head.
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: That's how blocked it is. And then you can't get
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: there like you're the guy presenting. You're the guy and
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: they paid plenty of money and you're there and you're
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: the high performance guy and you're the guy who's going
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: to talk to him about performing under pressure and you
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: know and resilience and adaptability, and you can't go, oh fuck,
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: I can't go with this. You've just got to do it.
• 27:33
  Speaker 1: And it's extremely difficult. And at the end of the day,
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: I was for that particular gig. This is me being
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: raw and vulnerable. I was so upset because I just
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: I don't think I did a very good job, but
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: I could fucking hear and I didn't care about if
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: they said to me, Craig, you can do that again
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: with no block, DearS, but we're going to pay you.
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: I would absolutely take that. I would rather do one
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: where I could hear everything but for no money, rather
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: than get the money and not do what I think
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: is the best job that I can do. I don't
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: know how we got to hear, but yeah, so that
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: was you know, dealing with that shit is it's and
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: these are all first world problems. It's not cancer. It's
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: not you know, nobody died. But yeah, it's just that
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: shit where you got to try to self manage as
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: well as you can.
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: So was there any feedback that day.
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, look, they liked it, but you know, I mean,
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: it wasn't a train wreck. But I don't think it
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: was brilliant. You know, well, it wasn't brilliant. It wasn't
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: a train wreck. And I did the best that I could.
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: But also the week before I did a whole day,
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: a whole day talking with one ear blocked in Mildura,
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: so I spoke for eight hours. But yeah, there's just
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: been so I've been having ongoing tests and seeing nts
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: and doctors and and you know, the last the last
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: few weeks on Planet Harps has been pretty interesting from
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: a clinical point of view, trying to get shit sorted
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: out and figure out like this myriad of symptoms, you know,
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: what's going on, and down to the point where I
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: haven't shared this, fuck it, I may as well tell
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: you've just opened the door. I was absolutely positive that
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: I had diabetes. Like there's twelve major symptoms. I had eleven.
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: I'd eleven and and anyway, so I just went into
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: the dock and he goes, what's going on. I think
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: I've got diabetes and he goes why, and I said,
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: I've got this, this, this, this, this, this, this this this,
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: and he goes, sounds like, you've got diabetes. Is there
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: any history of it in a family? I went, yep,
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: my old man and he goes, well, it's probably that,
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: and we did all my blood tests not that. And
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: then I'm like, oh, fuck, maybe it's like you know,
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: pross the old man's stuff, like PSA, which is the
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: hormone they measure to Have you ever heard of that
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: You probably don't need to anyway, It's a hormone that
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: they measure that kind of tells you whether or not
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: you've got a problem or not. Not all good. I'm like,
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: well that's good, but still, what the fuck is it? Yeah? Yeah, yeah,
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: So I think it just comes down to this infection
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: that I have in my head, which I only started.
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: I only found that out yesterday that I had one
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: side of my sinus is totally blocked, like totally blocked
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: and probably infected, well, definitely infected. So I started antibiotics
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: for that yesterday. But that was the first and also
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: I can explain you know, like the tiredness, the like
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: a you know, lack of energy, and like a bunch
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: of other things. You know, So hopefully that's that. So
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: we're treating it right now. So I'll be bursting out
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: on my fucking flannel shirt soon, well hopefully.
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: But it's I think it's so interesting that we're on
• 31:05
  Speaker 2: the podcast called that You Project, and here you are
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: in everything that you talk about in terms of performing
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: under pressure. You have literal physical pressure in your head
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: at the moment. Yeah, and you're still pushing through all
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: of it and doing what you need to do because
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: this is this is your world. Yes, So you're absolutely
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: right now the epitome of everything that you talk about.
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: Ah maybe, but thank you. I mean, look, there are
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: times when people and my life is great. I'm blessed.
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: This is not me winging. Most of the time in
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: my life, I feel somewhere between you know, good and
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: fucking great, but of late not. And so it's you know,
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: you don't want to be disingenuous, and you don't want
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: to lie to people, but I don't want to open
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: the door, you know with every person who goes, oh
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: how are you, and I go, so I just go, yeah,
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: pretty good. What about you? I just deflect and turn
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: it around. It's not that I don't want to be
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: I don't want anyone to know anything, but I go,
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: what's the value in this conversation for them? In this moment?
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: You know, it's like, here's me, all right, let's take
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: fifteen minutes of your life away by me telling you
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: about my bullshit. It doesn't really help you. But yeah,
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: when you feel you know, I always talk in like
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: numbers and stuff, but when you feel like a three
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: out of ten in terms of even cognitive function, your
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: ability to you know, think clearly, articulate things, recall things
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: you know, and then operational operationalize all of that into
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: like sentences and conversations in a meaningful way, that's a
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: bit interesting and inspiring. Oh, when your brain's not working
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: because you've got an infection in your head, it's like
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: going for a swim in fucking desert boots and a
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: lumberjacket or something. You know, it's like, oh, yeah, I
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: can swim, but it's almost impossible. Yeah, could I swim
• 33:01
  Speaker 1: to the other end of the pool in these jeans
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: and these boots in this jacket? Well, if I had to,
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: But you know so, but today I feel a little better.
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: I feel I feel improved on what I have. So
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: hopefully it's the antibiotics.
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: Well, fingers crossed. But see, I also think too that
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: if I'm of the belief that I want people in
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: my life, that when I ask them, you know, how
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: are you, they know that I'm genuinely asking and wanting
• 33:31
  Speaker 2: to know, and so tell me that you know. Well, actually,
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: today I'm feeling a bit shit. And you know the
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: reverse when one of my close friends asks me, well,
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: it's because they genuinely they want to know, and I
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: forget where I think. It was probably one of my
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: oldest friends, you know, my oldest friend. I've known him
• 33:52
  Speaker 2: for I think twenty five years, and so he's seen
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: many different versions of me, and he was like, when
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: I ask, I'm asking because I want to know. So
• 34:02
  Speaker 2: if you're not feeling great, tell me you're not feeling great.
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: I don't need for you to to pretend or to
• 34:08
  Speaker 2: be a certain way, or for you to think that
• 34:10
  Speaker 2: I want you to be a certain way. I just
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: genuinely want to know.
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: M Yeah, it's funny. I've got a bunch of mates,
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: but there's probably you know, like so My oldest mate
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: is Vin, and the guy I train with every day
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: is the Crab, and another one of my mates is Greg. Right,
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: all of those dudes I know would do anything for me.
• 34:36
  Speaker 3: Yep.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't ask it of them, but they'd do anything
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: for me. And that's nice, you know. But it's I
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: heard this interesting thing yesterday and it was when women talk,
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: and it's about you know, when women talk, you know, talk,
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: it's face to face. When men talk it's shoulder to shoulder. Yep.
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: It's like sitting side by side, or going to war together,
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: or driving together, or playing fucking rugby when you're in
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: a scrum together, or you know, just like sitting in
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: the back of a ute looking at the ocean, you know,
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: just it's more side by side to communication because we
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: don't want to look at each other. We don't have
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: that emotional level of depth that women can do that comfortably.
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: Blokes are like, fuck, is it hot in here? Yeah?
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: So I thought that's not true for every male and
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: every female of course, but I'm pretty comfy staring someone
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: in the face and telling him I love him. But yeah,
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: I think for a lot of dudes, you know, like
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: the Crab, as you you know the crab cop quite well.
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: He is. He would do anything for me, but trying
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: to get a hug out of him is like trying
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: to fucking get blood out of a stone. It's very
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: he's very very. In fact, what he did was for
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: my sixtieth birthday, he came up to me and, like
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: I've asked him for a huge a thousand times, He's
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: not into it. You want to hug me, he goes, nah,
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: I go, what about just like I just hug you
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: a little bit from the side, right, You don't have
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: to hug me back, but just like a quarter hug
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: where I kind of sneak up like a hugging ninja
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: and I just before you. He's like, no, right, he's
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: fucking emotionally inept. But he came up to me on
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: my birthday and goes, all right, I go what And
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: he's like all right, I go what. He goes, Happy birthday,
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: and he hugged me and it almost made me cry.
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my god, what a sacrifice that is
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: for the non hugger.
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: You know, it's a beautiful thing.
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: Well, it's just I'm like, fuck, I love that hug. Yeah, yeah,
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: you know, And Vin, who's my best mate, oldest mate.
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: You know, he's like a fucking Yogi bear. He just
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: wraps me up. He's like big, strong unit. It doesn't
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: even if you don't want to hug, you're getting a hug.
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: You're getting hugged. So but I do want to hug,
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: like but and he goes every time I see him,
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: you know whatever. And then every time he's going, he goes,
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: love you mate, and I go, love you too, mate,
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: And it's like it's so normal, it's so not awkward.
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: It's so and it's so authentic. But if I said
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: that to other friends of mine, they would not know
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: what to do.
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's and this takes me back to what I
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: was listening to with Simon Sinek, and he said the
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: exact same thing that he was testing this thing with
• 37:36
  Speaker 2: all of his male friends. He'd hug them and say
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: I love you, and he said, there's like maybe nine
• 37:41
  Speaker 2: out of ten of these people would say it back
• 37:44
  Speaker 2: except for one. And so it was his mission to
• 37:47
  Speaker 2: kind of, you know, wear that one down. And eventually
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: he said love me too.
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: Wow, Yeah, yeah, yeah me too, Yeah me too? Or
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: love love ya. Punch on the arm. Punch on the arm. Yeah.
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And it's interesting that I do this with my niece,
• 38:05
  Speaker 2: who I've mentioned before. She's thirteen, and you know, thirteen
• 38:10
  Speaker 2: knows everything, hates the world, and it's always what is
• 38:16
  Speaker 2: that about?
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: By the way, here go on, I have no idea.
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: I make a point of saying to her whenever I
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: hang up from a call, I love you, and she
• 38:24
  Speaker 2: will it's either eyes will roll or she'll sigh, or
• 38:28
  Speaker 2: she'll smile, or she'll mumble it. And now I get
• 38:32
  Speaker 2: texts that's just I lbue X from her, right. So
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: it's I'm trying to instill that in her that even
• 38:40
  Speaker 2: if she's only getting it from me, that it's it's
• 38:43
  Speaker 2: safe and it's okay for her to say that. And
• 38:46
  Speaker 2: so when she's when she's in a really good mood,
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: I get like maybe a big bubble, you know, I
• 38:50
  Speaker 2: love you, And then you know she's not the mood
• 38:55
  Speaker 2: I love you, but it's still there, and it's quite
• 38:59
  Speaker 2: nice because it's coming from her.
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: One hundred like that that one hug that the crab
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: gave me, you know, it's like worth one hundred hugs
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: from someone else because it's like a fucking you know,
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: this is a unicorn. This is this is a rarity,
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: you know, this is a gift. I think also too
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: with the I love you is, I think that like,
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: I would never try to. I might fuck around because
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: I'm an idiot, but I'd never genuinely try to. And
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: I'm not suggesting you were, but co were someone into
• 39:35
  Speaker 1: saying something just because you want them to say that.
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: It's like, well, I'm saying it to you, you should
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: say it back to me. It's like, well, no, no,
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: we don't know. Yeah, you don't create the rules for everything.
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: It's like, if you love her or if I love him,
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: I love you, mate, cool. And if you never say
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: it back, that's one hundred percent okay. And even if
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: you're mad at me, I still love you, even if
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: you think I'm a dickhead, I still love you. Are
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: always going to be here for you the end. Yeah.
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: So I think there's that awareness to that piece that
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: comes in. Yeah.
• 40:07
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, And you know that's pretty much the basis for friendship, right,
• 40:12
  Speaker 2: Like the understanding that even if you do fuck up,
• 40:15
  Speaker 2: even if you are a decade, even if you do
• 40:17
  Speaker 2: something stupid, as long as as you said, as long
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: as it's not unforgivable, that love, that genuine love, love
• 40:27
  Speaker 2: is always there. And that's that to me is the difference.
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: And I think I'll go on.
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: Sorry, I just think that, you know, it's that surrounding
• 40:38
  Speaker 2: yourself with the right people, Like if you if you
• 40:42
  Speaker 2: surround yourself myself with the right people, if you choose
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: the right people to let into your little world, then
• 40:49
  Speaker 2: hopefully you get that.
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: I was going to say something. I might get back
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: to it, but while you're saying that, I was thinking,
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: you know, you choose the right person or they choose bubbah,
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: but that's all cool. Do you think friendships have a
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: use by date or some of them? Yes? Yes, what
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: how do you how do you know when? And it's
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: not that necessarily they're terrible and but you got I
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: don't know. This kind of feels like it's just about
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: petered itself out. It's not that I hate them or
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: dislike them, but for whatever reason, I don't have the
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: same drive to spend time with them or hang out
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: with them. You know, if they needed something, I'd be there.
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: But it feels like it's kind of run its race.
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: What what are your thoughts about that? Yeah?
• 41:34
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, I think when if it's noticeable that values have changed.
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: Then yeah, sure.
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: I mean there's always kind of particularly with longer friends,
• 41:46
  Speaker 2: there's always history and you kind of go, okay, well,
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: I've known them since you know, dot and there's things
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: that they've done for me or I've done for them,
• 41:55
  Speaker 2: or they've been, you know, an integral part of my
• 41:57
  Speaker 2: life at a certain point. But we're now different phases,
• 42:04
  Speaker 2: and you know that might swing back around, you know,
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: you might reconnect, which has happened. But yeah, I think
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: certainly that there's people that are right for you at
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: certain times that don't necessarily stay with you on the rest.
• 42:20
  Speaker 3: Of the journey.
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: Mm I wrote a post I'm trying to remember. It
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: was like it says something like, when you're not paying attention,
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: I'll be saying nice things behind your back. And then
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: it says actual friends do that, and I'm like, yeah,
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: I love that. I love that when when somebody comes
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: to me, not for my ego, but they just went,
• 42:42
  Speaker 1: oh my god, you know who loves you and it's
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: like just pumping, I'm like, yeah, that makes me obviously,
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: that makes you feel good, right, But I've also had
• 42:52
  Speaker 1: people come to me, is this guy your friend or
• 42:55
  Speaker 1: because he was running you down, or I'm like, really,
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: what did he say? Yeah, well, you know, I don't
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: want to make any troth. I'm like, that's cool, just
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: you know, and I wouldn't go up to the person
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: and say anything, but it's like, yeah, that's interesting, that's interesting.
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: And I think there's this I think sometimes we mistake
• 43:15
  Speaker 1: proximity or situational interactions with friendship. It's like, oh, we
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: happen to see this person quite a lot because of
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: the context or the situation or the job, or and
• 43:31
  Speaker 1: maybe you are friends, but maybe you're not. Maybe you
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: just see each other a lot and you kind of
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: know each other a bit, but you know, yeah, I
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: think that mistaking like friendship with you know, how often
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: you interact with a person may or may not be indicative.
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: But yeah, there like there are people that I used
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: to think. I don't want to sound like Winjy Winster,
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: but I for a long time thought we're pretty good friends.
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: And then they're kind of almost a point in our
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: journey as people who knew each other. The context changed
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: and I didn't figure this out till later. And what
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: changed was, all of a sudden, I wasn't valuable to them.
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: And then when I was no longer valuable, when I
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: was no longer a good strategic alliance because I made
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: I could what open doors for them or give them
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: something or help them with something. When I was no
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: longer any value than they dropped me. And then there
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: are still people now. Obviously I would never say who,
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: but there are still people now that are in my phone,
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: and I only ever hear from them ever when they
• 44:45
  Speaker 1: want something and that name or one of the names
• 44:48
  Speaker 1: will come up. I go, oh, this will be great,
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: this will be great. And so they're, oh, man, how
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: you mean it's been a long time. I was just
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: I don't know. You just popped into my head. And
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: then there's three or four minutes of look, while I've
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: got you, do you reckon you? Could? You know? Do
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: you have such an do you have a contact for
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: such and such? Did you? And it's like that whole
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: four minute preamble. I feel like going, Okay, I know
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: what you're going to do. That's cool, So let's cut
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: out the preamble and just ask me what it is
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: you want to ask me. Because you rang me, you
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: didn't ring to see how I am. I'm not mad
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: about that. I'm not pissed off. I'm not resentful. I
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: just know what's going on. I wouldn't do this because
• 45:30
  Speaker 1: it's a bit pricky, but I feel like it. I
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: feel like, God, yeah, let's let's bypass all of that.
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: Ask me what you want to ask me, and then
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: we'll have a sixty second phone call, and then in
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: three years when you ring me again, we'll do the same. Yeah,
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: you know.
• 45:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, see, I don't feel like that's a bit pricky.
• 45:45
  Speaker 2: I think it. Actually, it really gives me the shits
• 45:47
  Speaker 2: when people just do things like that, Hey, you're You're
• 45:50
  Speaker 2: convenient for something that I need, so I'm going to
• 45:53
  Speaker 2: ask you. I'm very selective with who gets my time
• 46:01
  Speaker 2: and my energy, and that is you know, comes from
• 46:05
  Speaker 2: being burnt. And maybe it's you know, the introverted side
• 46:10
  Speaker 2: as well, because it previously had taken a lot to
• 46:14
  Speaker 2: push myself out there and trust people and become friends
• 46:17
  Speaker 2: with people. So once I've been burnt, then sorry, not
• 46:24
  Speaker 2: happening again.
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's hard because you know, I've spoken too many
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: times about people that have done some shitty things to
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: me over the years, and obviously the majority of my
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: interactions with people have been good, Right, So this is
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: this is not you know, this is a minority, but
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: it's happened quite a lot over four decades of working
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: and stuff. But you just get to the point where
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: you know you don't. It's like, I don't need another
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: person in my life. I'm happy to you know, I
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: don't like it's good. I'm good. I don't need more
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: people at the Craig table. Doesn't mean I'll never have
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: new friends or of course not. But if something happens organically, cool,
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: But I'm not proactively out there trying to fill my
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: dance card with new people, you know what I mean.
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: So head off tonight we're recording this. It's nearly three o'clock.
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: What times your flight?
• 47:23
  Speaker 2: Ten fifty five tonight. We are taking off to Italy
• 47:27
  Speaker 2: for a friend's birthday.
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: So wow, Yeah, it must be a good friend, because
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: that's that's quite the investment. Very good friend.
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: And it's interesting. So more so, this is my wife's
• 47:39
  Speaker 2: best friend. So you have known each other for a
• 47:43
  Speaker 2: very long time, and they have a very beautiful friendship
• 47:48
  Speaker 2: that has now extended to me. And there's a group
• 47:53
  Speaker 2: of us going and they're all just they're very lovely people.
• 48:00
  Speaker 2: So there's a really good energy with the group. We
• 48:04
  Speaker 2: all get along quite nicely. I think we all get
• 48:06
  Speaker 2: along quite nicely. Like my perception of the interactions is
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: that we all get along quite nicely. So yeah, it's
• 48:13
  Speaker 2: it is a testament to friendship that you and the
• 48:16
  Speaker 2: flip side of me saying that if someone has you know,
• 48:20
  Speaker 2: burnt me, then that's it. I'm done. The flip side
• 48:23
  Speaker 2: is that if I genuinely love someone, then I'll do
• 48:28
  Speaker 2: anything for them, you know, that's it in for life,
• 48:31
  Speaker 2: whatever you need. So it's yeah, and it's just it's
• 48:36
  Speaker 2: it's really nice to have been invited and to be
• 48:39
  Speaker 2: able to go on this incredible adventure with them.
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: Isn't it nice to meet people that don't live remotely
• 48:46
  Speaker 1: in your sphere, your world, your social kind of setting,
• 48:51
  Speaker 1: and their ace and you don't know anything about almost
• 48:56
  Speaker 1: the way they live or how it you know, what's
• 48:59
  Speaker 1: it like living in the middle of nowhere? What's it
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: like not having electricity? Or what's it like getting your
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: water from where and then filtering it? Or what's it like?
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: You know, just lately I've spoken with a few people
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: who are just so different, not better or worse, but
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: just so different, and their life and their lifestyle and
• 49:20
  Speaker 1: everything is so to me weird, but to them totally normal.
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: And when I tell people what I do, like the
• 49:27
  Speaker 1: people who don't know me, and they're like, okay, so
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: what do you talk to people about? And I tell
• 49:33
  Speaker 1: them and they're like ah, and you know people who
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: are totally They're like okay, and so, but how do
• 49:40
  Speaker 1: you make money? And I well, they pay me, so
• 49:46
  Speaker 1: so you go and work for an hour. I'm like yeah,
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: Well they're like, how do you make money from that?
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: Because they're thinking, well, even a good Holley rates like
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: seventy or eighty dollars, but if you only do three
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: of those a week, how are you going to male
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: two of those a week? Or And You're like, yeah,
• 50:05
  Speaker 1: it's not eighty dollars, you know it's And I don't
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: tell them that. It's like, yeah, trying to understand this
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: and pursuant to this, and this is a complete left turn.
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: But I think I want you to send the message
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: me a message after you do what I'm going to
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: ask you to do if you do it now. So Theovon,
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: who's a weirdo, you know who he is? Though, Okay,
• 50:29
  Speaker 1: so Theovon's got one of the top podcasts in the world.
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: It's in the top five now. He is born and
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: raised in the South, I think Missouri or Alabama or Louisiana,
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: maybe Alabama. But he's like what you would call a redneck,
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: or we would call out here a bogan, but a
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: lovable bogan. He's got you know, he's got the skin,
• 50:55
  Speaker 1: the head, he's got the mullet, and he's just he's
• 50:58
  Speaker 1: a really he's actually hit. It's smart and insightful. But
• 51:01
  Speaker 1: if you just listen to him and be like, how
• 51:03
  Speaker 1: dumb is this bloke? Like he gets his words muddled,
• 51:06
  Speaker 1: and you know, the word he's trying to find, but
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: he uses the wrong word in the sense but it
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: sounds like the word but it isn't the word right anyway.
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: And the interview is like and he doesn't, he doesn't.
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: Who did he have on? I think it was like,
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: not Matt Damon. It was the dude who did the
• 51:31
  Speaker 1: accountant one and two, Ben Affleck, right, So he had
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: Ben Affleck on and it must have been a pr
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: thing where and Ben Affleck was fine. He was just
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: talking to him and he's like, so, tell me about
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: this movie. And he's like, well, the Accountant too, and
• 51:45
  Speaker 1: he goes us. So there was another one like this
• 51:48
  Speaker 1: is you got fucking Ben Affleck on your show? Do
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: you not think that you would like at least read
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: for five minutes? He didn't even know that there was
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: an original movie like The Accountant, so he's just out
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: there anyway. The other day he had this what I
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: want you to listen to if you're insted. Also you
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: two listeners if you want. Some of you will absolutely
• 52:08
  Speaker 1: love it and some of you will be like this
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: is boring. I fucking loved it. So THEO interviewed this
• 52:15
  Speaker 1: kid who is Amish, I mean full on Amish. So
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: do you know what amish is? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, So
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: no electricity, no hot water, no hot showers, no cars,
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: no motorbikes, no no pushbikes, no television, no radio, no nothing. Right,
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: So this dude's never like he's grown up. It might
• 52:41
  Speaker 1: as well be the tenth century. Like he's grown up traveling,
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: you know, getting around on horses on horseback and horse
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: and buggies and you know, building barns and farms and
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: growing crops and you know all of that cultivating and
• 52:56
  Speaker 1: da da da and going to school in the community
• 52:59
  Speaker 1: where you just you know, you finish school at year
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: eight and then you work, right, and this is twenty
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: twenty five, like you finish school in year eight. They
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: never go to public schools full on. And THEO, who's
• 53:12
  Speaker 1: just this kind of you know, wide eyed, innocent, kind
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: of asking him these great questions and it was just
• 53:22
  Speaker 1: so funny. It was like, oh my god. It's like
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: two people literally, like two people from different centuries having
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: a conversation. And Theo's like, so what happens, you know,
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: like when you become a teenager and you know guys
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: girls like and his kids like, what do you mean?
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: He goes, you know, he's like no, and he's like, ah, okay,
• 53:50
  Speaker 1: well you know, like do the teachers or your parents
• 53:53
  Speaker 1: ever talked to you about sex? Or he goes, oh no,
• 53:56
  Speaker 1: we don't do that. Right. He's like like a you know,
• 54:01
  Speaker 1: I think he might be eighteen now, but he still
• 54:04
  Speaker 1: lives in the thing. But they have this on the farm.
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: But they have this it's like a year or two
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: where the kids, once they get to I think it's
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: sixteen and a half, they're allowed to head out into
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: the big wide worlds yes, and to see if they
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: want to be amish and two and some don't come back,
• 54:29
  Speaker 1: but most come back and they're like, fuck, it's shit
• 54:32
  Speaker 1: out there, I'd rather be here. But yeah, and so
• 54:36
  Speaker 1: he's on I forget the name of it. He's on
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: this kind of get out of jail card that they
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: have for a year or two, and then some of
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: them come home in two months, some of them stay
• 54:45
  Speaker 1: out the whole time, come home. Some of them don't
• 54:49
  Speaker 1: come back per se. But it's just fascinating listening to
• 54:53
  Speaker 1: this kid about you know, how he builds houses and
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: trains trains horses and you know, like Ceo had like
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: he'd never had a can of this stuff, like soft
• 55:07
  Speaker 1: drink stuff he didn't know. He didn't know how to
• 55:10
  Speaker 1: open a can of soft drink. Yeah, of course, not
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: like that. It's just like they've lived in another century.
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: And then you know he's you know, not seen movies.
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: He's not seen and he was trying to explain to
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: him the game charades or charades, you know, where you
• 55:27
  Speaker 1: go so you pick a movie titly he goes, and
• 55:30
  Speaker 1: the kids just like he goes, you've never seen a movie.
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: He goes, no, no, he's never seen a movie. Like yeah,
• 55:39
  Speaker 1: so cool, but it was just it was a fascinating listen.
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: So anyway, it's just go back a few episodes. Everybody
• 55:46
  Speaker 1: or anybody he wants to listen to it. You might
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: hate it, but I really liked it it kind of yeah,
• 55:51
  Speaker 1: it's just for me that that that kind of interaction
• 55:55
  Speaker 1: of two vastly different, different human beings but equally as
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: fascinated with one another.
• 56:02
  Speaker 2: I think, yeah, so, what's your challenge for me that
• 56:06
  Speaker 2: I need to message you about after?
• 56:07
  Speaker 1: Well, no, I just want you to watch or listen, listen, listen. Yeah,
• 56:12
  Speaker 1: just download it, listen on the plane or whenever if
• 56:14
  Speaker 1: you want, and then send me a message because you
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: might go yeah nah, or you might go loved it,
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: or you might go there. I just like to because
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: I really liked it. And I thought, maybe that's just
• 56:24
  Speaker 1: because I'm weird, Like there's stuff that I really like
• 56:27
  Speaker 1: that no one else likes, and then stuff that people love.
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't get it. I don't see it.
• 56:33
  Speaker 1: It's like so to me, manufactured and bullshitty and cheesy
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: and choreographed, and it's like, this is not organic, this
• 56:41
  Speaker 1: is not real, this is this isn't a monologue or
• 56:44
  Speaker 1: an act or this is people role playing being genuine,
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: but this is like this is it's so genuine, it's
• 56:52
  Speaker 1: awkward and clumsy. Excellent. I love that.
• 56:56
  Speaker 2: I thought you were going to challenge me to find
• 56:59
  Speaker 2: someone rand in a small village somewhere and ask them
• 57:02
  Speaker 2: something when there's a language barrier or something like that.
• 57:05
  Speaker 1: So I was like, shit, speaking of that, did you
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: see that Apple just brought out new earbuds that translate
• 57:13
  Speaker 1: in real time? Yes, that's the how Manger? So what
• 57:17
  Speaker 1: that means everyone and the all the three of you
• 57:19
  Speaker 1: who don't know. I'm sure most of you do. But
• 57:21
  Speaker 1: you can stand in a in the middle of a
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: conversation with somebody who, like Kelly, for example, is Italian.
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: She's not Italian, but she's gone to Italy, and they
• 57:32
  Speaker 1: can be talking English Italian. You can be talking English
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: and it's both getting translated both ways for you, so
• 57:39
  Speaker 1: you're both hearing it in your own language and talking
• 57:42
  Speaker 1: pretty much in real time. That's fucking incredible.
• 57:46
  Speaker 3: Isn't it?
• 57:46
  Speaker 2: Absolute game changer? Yeah. Look, I'm going to be the
• 57:50
  Speaker 2: most Australian Australian when I'm over there because my pronunciation
• 57:55
  Speaker 2: is awful. I we're frantically trying to learn and a
• 58:00
  Speaker 2: few phrases. Thankfully, we have an Italian in the group
• 58:04
  Speaker 2: with us and he is delightful, so he will be
• 58:08
  Speaker 2: doing the bulk of it for us. But yeah, when
• 58:11
  Speaker 2: we're on our own, we're dreading how how Aussie we're
• 58:14
  Speaker 2: going to sound.
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: Are you on WhatsApp? Yes? Yeah, so that means you
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: can text me, right? Yeah?
• 58:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: Cool? All right. Probably should have asked you that offair.
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: It doesn't matter. Hey, you have a great trip.
• 58:27
  Speaker 2: Thank you, and you get better soon.
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: I will. I'm on the mend. This has been very therapeutic.
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: When are you back or what are you? Two weeks away?
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: Three weeks away, three weeks away? All right, perfect, we'll
• 58:39
  Speaker 1: chat when you get back. Thanks Kele, Thanks Greg.