Latest / PHLV Radio / Navigating Filipino Identity in Western Spaces | #OnTheDot with Dot and Mia

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Navigating Filipino Identity in Western Spaces | #OnTheDot with Dot and Mia · PHLV Radio

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Speaker 1: On the Dot is presented by Benjamina Mia Casino licensed
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real estate professionals since two thousand and eight, license number
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S zero one sixty six LLC zero one six. It's
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a lunch hour in Vegas and we're on the dot
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with Dot and Mia here on p h l V radio.
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Speaker 2: And then don't happen. But then, oh my goa good evening.
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I don't know what day it is? What day is
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it me?
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Speaker 3: It's aus thirteen August thirteen.
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Speaker 2: Welcome to under Dad. My name is Dorothy told you
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can call him.
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Speaker 3: It's DoD Pe Night power Pe, Night Power, Power, Power Power.
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Speaker 4: My special guest today is Mia Casino him near Hello.
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Speaker 3: That happened a gala. Let's say, I know, I will
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my birthday happen?
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Speaker 2: Can happen?
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Speaker 4: Eating my uncle give, I don't try, I don't try.
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Satagalog and can come mactagalug the gallug our topic for today.
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Oh wait, before anything else. Happy birthday to Pam, Welcome.
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Speaker 2: Happy birthday.
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Speaker 4: We were in her house last week. You were until
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until Sunday in Wisconsin.
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Speaker 3: Always answer did you?
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Speaker 2: I did it? Did?
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Speaker 3: Happy birthday to sins in Landeras halberd Hubert.
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Speaker 2: Thank you to Quiryo for being very patient with us
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and very.
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Speaker 3: With all our kirks.
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Speaker 4: All right, So Mia chose our topic for today. Does
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Filipino culture fit in Western standards?
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Speaker 2: Does it?
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Speaker 5: So?
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Speaker 3: Does it?
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Speaker 2: Let us know? Why did you choose this topic?
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Speaker 3: Mire and WEEKA, So we talked about Philippine culture, Philippine language,
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you know, love your own.
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Speaker 4: And does it fit? How do you define Filipino culture?
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How do you define culture? What is the definition of culture?
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Speaker 3: Meta? Because you know, if.
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Speaker 4: You know the definition, please let us know. Because I
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did not research on that.
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Speaker 2: I know that.
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Speaker 4: I know that it involves your Kagayan, your your language,
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your food, your way of life, mindset, uh arts, crafts, literature,
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et cetera, et cetera, way.
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Speaker 2: Of life, your way of life? Is that? How it is?
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Is it defined? Me?
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Speaker 3: AI defines it as a vibrant mix of Indigenous, Asian, Spanish,
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and American influences, characterized by strong family bonds, deep seated
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religious religious.
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Speaker 2: Religion is part of.
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Speaker 3: Beliefs and a unique blend of traditions. Hospitality known as
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bay anihan is the cornerstone, with communities readily helping each other,
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welcoming guests as family. The culture emphasizes social harmony, maintaining
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close relationships, often prioritizing the needs of the family community
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over individual desires.
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Speaker 2: And Filipino culture.
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Speaker 3: According to AI Live, that's all animal.
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Speaker 4: Uh huh so I think my answer to that would
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be among are certain aspects that fit better or not.
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Speaker 3: Everything fit not all the time.
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Speaker 2: But you have a video of the show. I don't
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know if that is ready. If if that.
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Speaker 4: So that video is that you're already, but it has
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something to do with saying no, saying no.
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Speaker 2: I'd like to the.
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Speaker 3: Video saying is the Filipino culture is a yes culture. Yeah.
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Speaker 4: I was talking to a UP person the other day
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and I realized, I said, I said, I'm a yes man.
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I've been saying yes a lot you offerings among our suggestions.
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But I also realized that I'm very good at saying no.
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Mia he he uh.
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Speaker 2: Trained us to speak our minds. But the same, the
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same thing you can say about the UP culture.
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Speaker 4: You know, you can be rebellious, you can be assertive,
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and you can say no, how's your upbringing?
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Speaker 2: Oh?
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Speaker 3: No, cassing up the best of Philippines patriar cults. We're
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always chained to follow our parents. Yeah, we're always stayed
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at school. I brought was brought up in a Catholic school.
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Obey your parents, but please your community. So so when
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when I went here, I you know, states's to say no,
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gussing up. I would always say yes, yes, yes, to
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the point now it hurt a lady, And then I
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realized you can say no and then it feels better yes,
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and then you regret later on. So at the start plan,
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if you don't feel like it, you say no. Yeah.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, So here's a video, that video clip that went
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viral a few months ago. But we're gonna play it,
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and let's comment on this. If it's ready Instagram, Facebook,
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it's a Facebook Facebook shorts generation.
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Speaker 3: Facebook short.
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Speaker 2: If you're younger than us, you don't do Facebook anymore.
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Speaker 3: It's saying yeahs And let's look at the video.
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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, this is.
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Speaker 4: A she's a professor from up this lady who's explaining
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this the results of a test.
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Speaker 2: But we don't know if you can play that.
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Speaker 4: Okay, yeah, so before we play that, I'd like to
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read a portion from Speak Up from Why Yes. Doctor
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Abby Hamilton was our guest a few years back. Paramatam
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decades but a couple of years back, and she said
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she conducted a research on four hundred and seventy three
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Filipino Americans from thirty five states in the US and
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found that the more closely one adhered to Filipino interpersonal norms,
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the less assertive they were.
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Speaker 2: So in other words, but.
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Speaker 4: Well you know that, you know, the closer we are
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to our norms, the less assertive we are.
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Speaker 2: So us. Yeah, so let's see.
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Speaker 4: What the uh And we would like to have your
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comments audience, my audience participation takama card reading in Tayo.
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You have to say yes to this, okay, then we
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would like to hear your opinion if the if your
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culture as a Pinoy, do you fit in the western standards?
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Speaker 5: So?
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Speaker 2: Yessuh?
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Speaker 3: Sometimes no, sometimes more often than not. Ind because the
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reason why I chose. We were supposed to have a
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guest that was brought up here and she wasn't raised
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as you know, in Philippine traditions. And she was saying,
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sometimes if you she doesn't fit in as much as
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she wants to learn the culture, she doesn't feel like
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she blends in Oka.
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Speaker 2: It is America, all right, and if you're ready, here
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we go. This is sin culture.
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Speaker 5: Does not always fit Western standards and ideas. I'll give
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you an example. A group of students took these exams
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in order to make sure that they were clear of
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mental health issues. But when these Filipino students took the test,
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a high percentage of them are scoring very high on
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the psychotics schizophrenia scale, very high. So what did we find?
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It turned out that the Filipino students would always answer
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the questions as true. I talk to my dead relatives,
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I see ghosts, I see spirits.
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Speaker 3: And then I said, oh my god.
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Speaker 5: They always say true, true, true, true. You'll never say false.
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In this culture, if you understand it, everybody almost automatically
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says yes yes to everything. They dare not say no
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because there is a sun showing for no, and they
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think by doing that they.
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Speaker 2: Are pleasing the tester.
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Speaker 5: So yes to everything, the pataka, your grades are down,
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your skisophreing it. Can you imagine in psychology the results
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for Filipinos. Either you are dumb, you are stupid, you
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are crazy. Really, so, when I say Filipino psychology, it
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is supposed to be and must be culturally appropriate.
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Speaker 2: And how do you do this?
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Speaker 5: Know the culture, and how do you know the culture,
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learn the language, and then you will open the doors
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to culture at its freshest forward.
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Speaker 2: Love it, love it.
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Speaker 4: So learn the culture and develop your test instruments. Does
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that cover universities in Arica when they make tests for
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Filipinos and Asians, other Asians, Japanese, tied Koreans.
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Speaker 3: I know elementary they're buying ESL English as a second language,
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they test for that and then if they feel that
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you need to get to go into that program. Because
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I know where my kids were tested that because I
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brought them up, you know, as as Filipino speaking at
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home son sometimes because mentality, no Filipino families they speak
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to their kids in English, thinking but the things are
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school may rappenzella okay. But us we brought our children
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to speak the Galog, so they know the language, so
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they know that to speak the bilingual silla. But then
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when they got into elementary, they were tested to speak English.
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But then they had to go to class also to
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polish upon English. But they know how to. But I
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think they do that in all different languages.
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Speaker 2: Because this video that we're showing is psychological testing. Do
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you speak to ghosts? Yeah?
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Speaker 4: Do you speak to the dead yeah, because that's also
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part of our religion. We pray for the dead, we
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speak to our dearly departed questions and sometimes. So it
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doesn't mean that we're schizophrenic.
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Speaker 2: Or bobo or or.
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Speaker 4: It's just that it's part of our upbringing. It's part
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of our daily life. So interesting because he and testing
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the the Filipinos in America that I'm not I'm not
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a teacher here, but I was a teacher Pilippines. Uh,
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you really have to take into consideration on environment non
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test taker, and you have to frame the language in
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such a way as they understand the implications. No, no answer,
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snila if they did that, because it's a you know,
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how Koreans would how Koreans invaded the Philippines before learning English.
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Speaker 3: Yeah.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, And we had to fashion our test instruments, the
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rule breaks of our tests so that they could get
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the essence.
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Speaker 2: What is it that we're testing?
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Speaker 4: Are we testing verbs or nouns or comprehension or writing
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or speaking whatever, But we're not testing the content of
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the of the of the statement, for example, in departing
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examples of Koreans and Philippino and context.
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Speaker 2: So it has to be mana neutral.
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Speaker 4: Manaa topics that we're testing for language, but with this
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one its on example, not in. Yeah, the Filipino culture.
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According also to doctor Abi Hamilton, the closer we are
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to being Pinoise, the further we are from being in
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the culture. So how do you how do you merge them?
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It call mea how do you how do you encourage
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your children to be more assertive American cultures, American standards.
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Speaker 3: I never really had to encourage them fit blended. They
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were born here, Yeah, they were born here. I introduced
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them to Philippine culture. Your new young roal care was
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to introduce them to Philippine culture. I like my eldest
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I brought her into Filippini and a dance company.
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Speaker 4: So apparently the American culture is their first culture. That
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was Filipino is their foreign second.
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Speaker 3: At the same time, instillcha caanila, then they're Filippinos because
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you know, I we speak the Gallag at home, and
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then they read books in the Gallo. We have TFC
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that's good. Yeah, and they watch Filipino movies. They listen
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to Filipino jokes. La comnan yeah, be causin. I wanted
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them to be not be immersed into the culture.
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Speaker 4: Well, I only have one UH son here who is
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learning the Filipino culture by going around with.
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Speaker 2: His Filipino friends.
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Speaker 4: And it's learning the Galog from them, not from me,
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because our first language at home is Elongo. So I
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so mommy, he would he would say, Mommy, how do
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I say.
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Speaker 2: Okay? So he would attend okay.
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Speaker 3: And it's easier Also if if both of you are
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of the same language, like the Filipino Filipino and America
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like how you are. But but it's easier to teach
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the language. That's true, you speak it, it's easier to
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learn it if you speak it at home.
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Speaker 4: Right, And language is just one component of our culture.
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My religion, like you said, a.
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Speaker 3: Religious are religious?
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Speaker 2: Religious believes.
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Speaker 4: Music, art, bananaw, cultural norms. So I want to share
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if if there are no is there any opinion on
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the web or on Facebook wherever we are, If you
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have any opinion, please let us know because we would
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like to hear you. So this book Amiya Caring starts
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with me a Calmuna. It is a culturally sensitive self
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care program for immigrant Filipino nurses developed by uh Lisa,
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Lisa Domboa, Elizabeth Damboa and yours truly SAMs do. So
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we singled out a few Filipino norms.
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Speaker 2: A more propero, A more proprio.
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Speaker 3: Okay, it's a more prop if it's.
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Speaker 4: Self esteem and also social acceptance.
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Speaker 3: So what's the more propriatement.
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Speaker 4: A I am more appropriate, you, Lisa, is a self
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esteem or senself.
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Speaker 3: My examples don't book. I don't need help, I don't
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have a problem. Oh this is nothing. It's not a
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big deal. I don't need anyone's helping. Pride, I can.
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Speaker 4: Handle my own propri in a way it it is
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also in line with what we're saying in detail. You assertive.
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We don't say yeah, yeah I need help, Yeah I.
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Speaker 2: Have a problem.
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Speaker 3: I'm propriate.
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Speaker 4: I don't be a challenges more because of your pride,
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I can handle it on my own. On the healthy level,
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it may show up as self respect, integrity, and pride.
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The unhealthy level, I'm unhealthy and unhealthy, it may show
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up as rigidity, lack of humility, reluctance to admit mistakes.
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So how does that fit in Western standards? Western American?
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Does that show up for you mire more appropriate?
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Speaker 3: Yeah, because if you say I don't need help, you
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said you don't need healthy. They won't help you. Yeah,
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it's as simple as that.
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Speaker 4: Sabini, there's a there's a there's an essay here.
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Speaker 2: I'm not going to read this essay. Let me say
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your art around, Bulu Silver it is to misframe the
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question entirely. It presumes that Western paradigms are the default
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measure of value, coherence, and legitimacy, an assumption that has
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long distorted the Filipino psyche. Begin with the very architecture
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of our educate educational system. But mister Elisa, our question
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is related to our being here in America. But AKSA
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Pilipinas edition pretty deep.
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Speaker 4: We should not frame the the question kumasa Pilipinas die. Yeah,
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but I'm going to read that in a little bit.
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I like what you said. Our educational system is framed
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so American standards, and that's true. That's where we got
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our educational standard. Filipino culture does not need to fit
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Western standards. It needs to be restored to its rightful
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place as a culture of revolutionaries, philosophers, artists, and sovereign thinkers.
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Speaker 2: Love that.
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Speaker 4: Yes, we must, we must build an education system not
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modeled after a simulationist frameworks. But after the spirit of
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our own revolutionary legacy resulted that seek to form to empire.
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He challenged it with grace, wit and position.
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Speaker 3: Yes, thank you for your views.
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Speaker 4: Thank you for that. I think if the video that
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we posted was uh based on tests in the Philippines,
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I think, but you should not frame it Western culture.
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But America, that is the that is an issue. We
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are the ones, we are the we are the immigrants,
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so we need to assimilate. Thank you very much. Let's
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say you for your input. Mister say you are a
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rambulu silva. Thank you for that. All right, so I'm
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more proprial. The next one is the bahalaa.
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Speaker 3: Batman.
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Speaker 2: Can you read it from your from your phone here?
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Speaker 3: Bahlana is come what me.
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Speaker 2: Superman?
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Speaker 3: Yeah?
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Speaker 2: Okay, So more examples of.
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Speaker 3: When something comes up and you give me a unfavorably Yeah,
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m hm you let fait mm hmmm.
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Speaker 2: Whatever, whatever, It's okay. If this is meant to be,
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maybe it is faith, the fatalism.
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Speaker 4: I just have to deal with it. It almost though.
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This is this one is sad. Just suck it up.
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This is better. This is better than my previous situation
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in Bahlana. So on the healthy level, it may show
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up a surrender, Yeah, okay, Balana se Batman, trusted the unknown, risk,
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taking faith in higher power or God, God's will. At
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the unhealthy level, it may show up as lack of accountability, fatalism,
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and recklessness.
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Speaker 2: How does it show up? America?
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Speaker 3: But if I heard that a lot? But it's God's will,
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it's meant to be, MTV.
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Speaker 2: Let be letter, b letter, MTV TV letter be let
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it be.
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Speaker 4: I haven't been in a workplace here America. So you
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do you have American clients?
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Speaker 2: Oh? Yeah? And does that show up?
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Speaker 3: And nothing at all? And usually that uhlan timeline.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, but if you applied that wording, yeah, you know
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to them? How does that?
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Speaker 3: I think if it's if it, if it, it's meant
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to be, then it will happen.
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Speaker 2: I think, yeah, alrighty. The next one is I like
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this by any hand. We are heroes for each other
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sample amad animal statements.
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Speaker 3: I need to help others. I have been given an assignment,
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so I have to make sure things are done. I
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can't fail anyone. Things will be better when we accomplish
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the task. I made a commitment. I think you buy
24:45
any hand refers to also that's true, and I think
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this is very good for us if we apply this
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American culture. Yeah, I think I've heard Americans giving feedback teamwork,
25:05
especially it's a nurses.
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Speaker 2: At the healthy level, this may show up as cooperation, teamwork,
25:10
and supportiveness. At the unhealthy level may show up as
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group think, bandwagon effect, mind following you yeah, yeah, yeah,
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I'm gonna help, even if it's against the principle. True.
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Speaker 4: And this is where the earlier text on assertiveness would
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be applicable. If you don't like what you're being asked
25:39
to do, learn to say no no by any hand.
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Speaker 2: You know it's a team work.
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Speaker 3: Are you going against a certain movement person? And then
25:50
you're being asked to join and you really don't want to?
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Speaker 6: Right?
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Speaker 2: Right? What am I? Gonn alone? Is the colonial mentality?
26:03
Last jam on? Uh? The internalized oppression?
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Speaker 4: I see, I don't see Lisa, she she made, she made,
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she clarified this, uh, this kind of Filipino norm when
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she wrote that internalized oppression. I need to be more American. Okay,
26:28
so now we're here, how do we Is this good?
26:33
Is this applicable? I need to be more American. I
26:35
need to get rid of my take accent. They will
26:39
fire me if I speak up, I am not worthy.
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They will never measure up. Westerners are superior. So we
26:47
hear a lot of Filipinos with very American accent, a
26:54
Filipinos malacastin and Filipino accent Sunday And how does that?
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Speaker 2: How do you speak English? Someone?
27:05
Speaker 3: I speak like normal English. But sometimes the way we
27:09
were taught English because British, so I by young young
27:17
you have on the second syllables there are sometimes they
27:21
don't understand.
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Speaker 4: The cold, okay something it's some listener, nothing colonde.
27:40
Speaker 3: You know, I can I'm not social and conya in
27:45
the divis sometimes but not so. Indeed, like when I
27:52
was New Year, I was looking for cotton. Where's the
27:57
cotton on the cotton? Cotton cotton, explaining cotton? Give us
28:15
a Philippines and bula pinapool, Yes, explained.
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Speaker 2: That source.
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Speaker 4: Another my mama medical words Lisa that she she shared
28:35
with us. So you know, when it comes to accent
28:38
and pronunciation and where is the emphasis, you know? So
28:44
that's when we were back to Philippinis in colonial mentality
28:50
showed up us made in the U s A American
28:55
music is better, Uh, fashion books, art, and all that
29:04
when we thought that, uh, the Western Western stuff was
29:10
way better than our stuff. So we imvibed that, yeahza
29:21
apple hiking, American jungle it out of.
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Speaker 3: You tend to appreciate what you don't have. But you
29:31
know what what changed when I went here in the US.
29:34
So the very few years that I was here, you know,
29:38
you hear them. You get intimidated. Sometimes you get intimidated
29:42
to speak English to thinking, you know, your English is
29:46
not good enough. So I went when I went into
29:49
the corporate world, here's a U S A L E.
29:52
So your mob bosses covered speaking very fast English and
29:56
Tata English. But then when they wrote and it wasn't
30:01
in the correct spelling, certain building confidence.
30:12
Speaker 4: We may not be very good speakers when it comes
30:16
to accent and pronunciation, but because our English is book English,
30:23
teachers called the olds you pere your English is very
30:27
book English, bookish, textbook, textbook English.
30:32
Speaker 2: It's not you know, we were not born into it.
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Speaker 3: Right, And and that's what I realized to they speak
30:38
fluent English and very fast English because that's their first
30:42
language exactly. And then I realized, you know, you just
30:45
have to be comfortable with how you speak and they
30:49
understand the second language Man spoken English to.
30:54
Speaker 4: Understand out in now that we're here, we don't need
30:59
to uh really try so hard to be because you
31:08
know nothing, it's not uh structured to be really and nasil.
31:16
You know, the Cans, they really have very thin noses
31:20
of bridge nila, so they tend to be to sound
31:22
more naisal. You observe your manga very human born here
31:27
and their noses are pinched like that, they're thin the back,
31:32
so they tend to be more nay.
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Speaker 2: So my.
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Speaker 4: Time point sound because you know, but the idea that
31:45
you know, at the unhealthy levels on colonial mentality may
31:49
show up inferiority complex complex.
31:56
Speaker 2: Ancient hate, racism, and national shape and that's sad, you know.
32:02
And also the color of our skin, you know, so
32:07
where do we fit in. It's a good thing we're
32:09
fitting in when it comes to skin color nowadays, because
32:13
there's an awareness against Asian heat, people tend to be
32:20
more open, at least in my circle, they tend to
32:24
be more open. So existence brown skinned human beings around
32:31
at the healthy level and colonial mentality.
32:34
Speaker 3: Colonial mentality level uh may show a healthy level, but
32:40
may show up as respect for adopted homeland openness to
32:44
new culture, visionalism, congregating according to provisional.
32:49
Speaker 2: Route provincial roots.
32:51
Speaker 3: A provincial so healthy sha if we.
32:57
Speaker 4: If we gather together toples, we celebrate our identity in
33:03
Ma malailka, no association, Elong association, Kama association.
33:10
Speaker 3: You know, even Philippines. Then there's there's also you know
33:15
you joke about it, regent the buy desire, I get
33:19
it you accent then, which shouldn't be.
33:24
Speaker 2: Okay long yeah, yeah.
33:27
Speaker 4: I think the more open the world is, especially with
33:31
travel and internet and access to information, the wider we
33:38
see that we are diverse and it's okay.
33:43
Speaker 2: Yeah, lebatime comments on and what time is it? Is
33:49
it time for a break, Yes, it's time for a break.
33:53
I'm gonna put a card for you mire to mobile.
33:58
We're gonna talk about your cardinal a bit and then
34:01
a few more, a few more Filipino ner norms, norms
34:11
more so, let's take a break.
34:14
Speaker 1: Stay with Us is presented by Benjamina Mia Casino Licensed
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real Estate Professionals since two thousand and eight License number
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s zero one sixty six. LC on the Dot is
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presented by Benjamina Mia Casino Licensed real Estate Professionals since
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two thousand and eight, license number s zero one sixty
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six one LC. It's a lunch hour in Vegas and
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we're on the dot with Dot and Mia here on
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p h l V Radio.
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Speaker 4: Hello again, we're back and we would like to say
35:35
hello to our What is this? Let me see our
35:42
new pH l V t V on the pH LV
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radio website. Hello, hello everyone, You'm a makeup alasia alchemia
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and exciting alchema skin skin spots on spots.
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Speaker 3: I want to invite everyone to NAFA and Aria's Networking
36:11
on August twenty first at the Roots Room of Red Rock,
36:17
a Red Rock Hotel and casino. So it's open to
36:22
all active members of NAFA. You get one drink and
36:27
food past treays free August twenty first, Yes, August twenty first,
36:36
So it's free to all active members, so if you
36:39
haven't anew yet, renewed already or become a member. But
36:43
for non members it's twenty five dollars okay. So it's
36:46
a it's a poor party. So if you want to swim,
36:49
you can stream. But it's a networking event. So ARIA
36:52
is Asian Real Estate Asian Real Estate Association of America
36:58
and so that's a joint between area and NAPA.
37:01
Speaker 2: Nice nice nice a real estate.
37:06
Speaker 3: Yes, association, it's a national association.
37:12
Speaker 2: Yeah.
37:13
Speaker 4: We're just talking about regional regionalism and that's celebrating our region,
37:21
our identity as Asians.
37:23
Speaker 3: Yes.
37:23
Speaker 2: Yeah, so no card, MoMA. My card is the Queen
37:28
of Water, the Queen of Water. What does it say?
37:33
Speaker 3: It's tender hearted, empathetic, naps patient and loving. Does it
37:40
describe the Queen of water?
37:43
Speaker 2: Okay, So I'll explain in a bit.
37:45
Speaker 3: And then relationships developed to a new level. Trust your intuition,
37:51
care for yourself and others.
37:54
Speaker 4: Okay, So we we both have water cards. Yours mine
38:00
is Page of Water. So so page and then Knight,
38:06
Queen and King. So the water symbolizes relationships and emotions.
38:15
Speaker 2: So say yo for clean of water.
38:17
Speaker 4: You it's it's either you and the card is referring
38:23
to So these are messages from the angels, all right.
38:27
It could be talking about you, or it could be
38:29
talking about the the energy of a very powerful or
38:33
very strong woman.
38:35
Speaker 2: Okay, leader, So if it's you.
38:38
Speaker 4: You might think of yourself as a tender hearted, empathetic,
38:43
patient and loving, and then new relationships will develop to
38:47
a new level could be your but most most likely
38:53
it's your relationships with people close You're not not necessarily business.
38:58
It's a family or friend ship. And about yours suppose
39:03
you have to trust your intuition and you care for
39:05
yourself and others. So that's a message for you, Mia,
39:10
care for yourself and others and trust your intuition.
39:12
Speaker 2: Mal intuition, scorp your capital. Yeah, you sucking?
39:17
Speaker 3: And what's yours?
39:19
Speaker 2: Sucking? Aking page of water?
39:24
Speaker 4: It says sorry, ugly, photoco, intuitive, sensitive, artistic and friendly.
39:33
A new person enters my life, Mia, a relationship begins
39:38
a new phase. And it says also heightened psychic abilities.
39:42
Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that.
39:45
Speaker 2: So the new person entering my life, I don't know.
39:48
Speaker 4: It could be a new friend and maybe it refers
39:54
to the baby.
39:54
Speaker 2: Coming to the family, Yeah.
39:57
Speaker 4: In December, and relationship really relationship begins a new face
40:01
and going to be a Lola again. Uh And I
40:05
love that. It this these cards which we have emotions
40:10
and relationships. These are very important, Lalona. You know, you
40:14
know our topic is about our culture in Western standards.
40:22
It's important that we strengthen our relationships. Lalona. We're here
40:26
in a foreign Land that we need to assimilate.
40:30
Speaker 2: So very nice. Yeah, moving on? Do we do? We
40:34
want to move on? How does the card relate to you?
40:37
Speaker 3: Very late able?
40:39
Speaker 2: You like it? You like?
40:41
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah you're correct and very intuitive and yeah you
40:45
have to trust your intuition and of others too.
40:50
Speaker 4: Interesting because is self care self care manual? So in
40:56
the ebank pattle, it means one of us in uh,
41:07
like when we talk to each other sometimes with some couple.
41:11
Speaker 2: Where you going Garland?
41:15
Speaker 4: You know, it's like, you know, we're very intimate with
41:18
the little details that sama Westerners.
41:21
Speaker 2: What do you care where I'm going?
41:27
Speaker 1: Yeah?
41:28
Speaker 3: Like that.
41:29
Speaker 2: Yes, there's a mutual trust among us. Among us.
41:33
Speaker 4: Healthy level may show up as treating people like their
41:36
own respect, being amenable and accommodating oneness, diversity and inclusivity
41:43
at the unhealthy level may show up as a disregard
41:46
for privacy, lack of a sense of boundary and personal space.
41:51
That one, I don't want to do that.
41:55
Speaker 3: Or sometimes but I would think so Western you come
41:59
and announced.
42:01
Speaker 2: Yes, yes from the Yeah you.
42:06
Speaker 3: Know you come uninvited parties? Oh yes, yeah, I have
42:14
to r s BP if you're come in with a
42:16
plus one or plus ten.
42:23
Speaker 4: That's the kind of norm that I would not love
42:27
to insert or offer some Western standards.
42:44
Speaker 6: Co it by yeah, okay, next one me you yeah, yeah, shame, propriety,
42:54
dignity mhmm, and then one statements it's embarrassing.
43:00
Speaker 3: I don't want anyone to know people are staring at me.
43:05
I'll be the top of the town. It's hard to
43:07
face other people. Don't dishonor our family. I'll carry this
43:11
to my grave.
43:14
Speaker 4: The different ways that they show up so unhealthy, healthy
43:19
and unhealthy levels mia.
43:21
Speaker 3: It may show up as a sense of propriety, dignity, discretion,
43:25
and humility mm hmm. Unhealthy, and may show up as shame, powerlessness,
43:33
and humiliation. So it does a place, Yeah, it does
43:36
a place.
43:37
Speaker 2: Now, yeah depends it depends.
43:43
Speaker 3: Here like shy m h.
43:47
Speaker 2: Powerlessness, but then or yeah Michelle.
43:59
Speaker 3: For wordy extreme scog and I hate, I hate. I
44:21
don't like that. Nina Scuogan new initial enthusiasm.
44:26
Speaker 2: I don't like that either.
44:29
Speaker 3: So so examples would be I'm very excited to start
44:32
this project, start lang. My new Year's a solution this
44:36
year is just give me time I can finish this project.
44:41
And a heartbeat I need to take a little break
44:44
from this. Don't worry, it will get done soon. I
44:47
will do it later. Let's not hurry, there's still time.
44:51
Speaker 2: Yeah, I really don't like the Nina schoogo into.
44:54
Speaker 3: I don't like that.
44:55
Speaker 2: A lot of spelling for that is co and cogon.
45:02
Speaker 4: It's a it's a grass, it's a tall grass on.
45:10
Speaker 2: Your healthy level, ninas cogonia.
45:14
Speaker 3: So it may show up as enthusiasm and initiative, encouragement,
45:18
honoring boundaries and limitations to mitigate chases and pressure.
45:24
Speaker 4: Oh you know what, there are there are times when
45:27
we need to just abandon something if we started it
45:30
now now, you know, Hindi maganda, So let's take accountability
45:36
and let's abandon it. Indeed, this is not gonna work
45:40
work because you can pair it with here.
45:45
Speaker 2: Some people don't finish because I mean, some people pursue it.
45:55
Speaker 3: To say no, it's a healthy level, man, unhealthy level.
46:00
Unhealthy may show up as involvement in too many things,
46:04
volunteering to spearhead but not delivering to completion, fleeting enthusiasm,
46:10
lack of perseverance or sustain interest, or procrastination. Oh yeah,
46:17
you know, I don't want yet you finish what you start.
46:22
Speaker 4: Right, and at some point you need to assert to
46:25
assess are we doing the right thing? Shall we move
46:29
on or not? Important organization America.
46:39
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I don't think you don't just you don't
46:42
just abandon Yeah, yeah, no, I don't think that would
46:47
work out.
46:52
Speaker 4: Keep a kappa or togetherness and community and pakikisa fellowship.
46:57
I don't need to belong there, do need to ruffle
46:59
anyone's feather. I can't be alienated. I need to be
47:02
a team player. I guess I have to take one
47:04
for the team healthy level of togetherness, community, fellowship, companionship.
47:15
Unhealthy is the inability to set boundaries or to say
47:20
no inauthentic yes, a false sense of obligation. I a
47:27
false sense of of obligation dangerous.
47:32
Speaker 2: If peer pressure our young Filipino.
47:40
Speaker 4: Peers, Yeah, if they invite they are invited to take
47:45
drugs for example, or.
47:48
Speaker 2: Drinking spreez or whatever malamai A in all cultures, then
48:00
the bounder pressure, not just Filippinis.
48:03
Speaker 4: So we have to be mindful of what we want
48:07
to say yes to or no to. Yes, it will last.
48:14
Speaker 2: According to my American husband, he would read this double
48:24
uh come can you read.
48:26
Speaker 3: That it's indebtedness or death of gratitude. I owe him
48:31
or her a favor. It's hard to repay their kindness.
48:34
I will forever be indebted to him or her. I
48:38
am forever grateful and will do anything for this person.
48:44
Speaker 2: And the healthy level.
48:46
Speaker 3: Healthy level, it may show up as gratefulness, being appreciative
48:50
of assistance received. On the unhealthy level may show up
48:55
as disempowerment, resentment, or lifelong indebtedness gravil flow.
49:01
Speaker 4: Of course, you can say, yeah, oh, that's when it
49:07
becomes bad. Nineteen six sixty two, favor one hundred persons.
49:15
Anything the other person asks you to do, you have
49:17
to do one hundred persons in nineteen sixty two. That's
49:22
that's too long, life flowing.
49:24
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, yeah, that's the unhealthy part.
49:28
Speaker 2: I know your gratitude.
49:30
Speaker 4: I'm forever grateful and sponsors as in an exponsor America.
49:37
Speaker 3: Akay, I don't think you could ever repay that, but
49:53
you just be grateful. You just say thank you. And
49:56
you know, I don't think paga your great well And
50:00
when I think if you do something good, you don't
50:03
need to be repeated, and I would like, oh, I
50:07
love that yess, yes, yes, return the favor, be grateful
50:14
and then I don't know.
50:15
Speaker 4: I mean if you if you're doing that, you're the
50:17
one extending the favor. And other than that, some cultural
50:23
norms not in We have religious practices that may influence attitudes,
50:28
practices or decision making, like our religious holidays and rituals
50:34
attending my service because we were the Filipino is a
50:42
majority is Catholic. Healthy level show up as hope, compassion, faith,
50:48
positivism during adversities or challenges. At the unhealthy level may
50:53
show up as rigidity over practices, religiosity, being judgmental of
50:58
people not sharing the beliefs, bigotry and arrogance or what
51:03
what diamond so I would say naha level pack healthy
51:09
and Filipino norm okay in some Americans packing the healthy.
51:18
Speaker 3: I think that the younger generation can see the good
51:22
and bad of the culture also and they tend to
51:27
not absorb the bad.
51:29
Speaker 4: Also, yeah, my Mansilla, they have filters. I like that
51:38
they can decide for themselves, recording, putting, putting Indian. There
51:43
are many other things. I think there are a few
51:45
more things better. They're not included in our in our
51:51
manual for it is at the end are our practices
52:01
for self care, caring for the mind, caring for the emotions,
52:05
and caring for the body. We would like to actually
52:08
develop another one that's uh for paran generic, not necessarily
52:14
just for nurses, but for Filipinos in general. How do
52:19
we care for ourselves while.
52:20
Speaker 2: We are living in in this country?
52:23
Speaker 3: That's very good?
52:24
Speaker 2: Thank you quote, tie you quote, I have.
52:29
Speaker 3: A call from my favorite writer ts Eliot. Okay, a
52:33
national culture, if it is to flourish, should be a
52:37
constellation of cultures that the constitution, the constitutes of that
52:44
constitutes of which benefiting each other, benefits the whole.
52:50
Speaker 2: Okay, so what benefits one should benefit the whole.
52:54
Speaker 3: So Para, we mixed Malatinan culture, but sabin anila annong
53:00
citizenship more.
53:01
Speaker 2: I'm a citizen of the earth.
53:03
Speaker 3: Yes, and I.
53:10
Speaker 4: Thank you so I hope well.
53:14
Speaker 2: I enjoyed the topic.
53:15
Speaker 4: Yes, thank you for picking, you for guesting, Thank you
53:18
for guesting to Yeah, I'm so happy for that. And
53:22
if you want to join the UP Alumni Association president
53:27
she's outgoing.
53:28
Speaker 3: Yeah an here, Yes, join us UP. Just visit our
53:35
website w w w U p A A n V
53:38
dot com. If you're a graduate of the University of
53:42
the Philippines any campus, seventy five dollars. That's lifetime membership.
53:48
Or give me a call two eight one nine series
53:51
six nine zero six three. You welcome to China's anytime.
53:56
Speaker 2: Election coming next, Yes, election, don't be rude, be kind,
54:01
all right, she'll be a ruder. Yeah, all right, thank you. Bye.
54:25
Speaker 1: On Adult is presented by Benjamina Mia Casino, Licensed real
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Estate Professionals since two thousand and eight, license number S
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zero one sixty six nine one LLC. On the Dot
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is presented by Benjamina Mia Casino, Licensed real Estate Professionals
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since two thousand and eight, license number S zero one
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sixty six nine nine one LLC