Latest / Start Your Comeback: Rebuilding after Divorce, Empty Nest, and Loss of Spouse / Navigating Decision Making in the Soul Wilderness

Transcript

Navigating Decision Making in the Soul Wilderness · Start Your Comeback: Rebuilding after Divorce, Empty Nest, and Loss of Spouse

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Is there a major life transition benching you?
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: I know you may be asking what's next?
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: What's my purpose?
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: What if?
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Because I've asked those too.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Start your Comeback Podcast.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: I'm Toni Thrash, a certified life coach, and I want to share the tools and practical steps to help you create a winning game plan to move into your new adventure.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: Hi, welcome back.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: You're listening to episode 87.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: I've got something exciting to share with you.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: I'm currently writing my very first book Start your Comeback.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: This book has been a long time coming and is born out of years of walking through real life transitions, coaching others through theirs and learning how to build a comeback strategy when life knocks you flat.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: It's packed with honest stories, hard-won lessons and game plans to help you rise again stronger, wiser, and more plans to help you rise again stronger, wiser and more anchored in who you are.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: I can't wait to get it in your hands.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: Stay tuned.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: Today we are heading into the wilderness.
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: That's right, you heard me.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: The wilderness, not the kind with pine trees and hammocks, not the curated Instagram version with the sunrise in the background and a filtered quote over it.
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: No, I'm talking about the soul wilderness, the gritty, confusing, heart-wrenching, identity-questioning space we call limbo.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: This is the season where the map has run out, the compass spins and every familiar landmark has vanished.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: The noise is gone and what you're left with is stillness.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: And in that stillness, doubt pulls up a chair, especially when it comes to decision making.
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: You see, limbo is not failure, it's formation.
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: Let's get one thing straight right now You're not lost, you're being led.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: I know it doesn't feel that way.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: You don't have a map, you don't have cell service, you don't have a clue what the next 30 days or even the next 30 minutes hold.
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: But just because you don't see a path doesn't mean there isn't one.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: And just because you're unsure doesn't mean you're unsafe.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: And just because doubt is loud doesn't mean it's telling the truth.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: You see, limbo feels like standing in a hallway where every door is either locked or unmarked.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: You keep reaching for doorknobs that won't turn and eventually you start wondering and asking yourself these questions Did I miss it?
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: Did I mess up?
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: Is God even here?
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: Was there even a promise in the first place?
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: Near, was there even a promise in the first place?
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: But hear me and I'm saying this from the trenches not a stage.
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: Silence is not absence and doubt is not your guide.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: You see, there's a purpose in the wilderness.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: Let's talk about the Bible for just a second.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: You see, the wilderness wasn't a side note or isn't a side note in Scripture.
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: It's a stage, a proving ground.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: It's where Jesus went before his public ministry.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: It's where Israel was formed before they ever stepped foot into the promised land.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: It's where Hagar, abandoned and afraid, met God and gave him the name El Roy, the God who sees me.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: You see, the wilderness is not punishment, it's preparation.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: This is where God shapes the kind of character that can carry a comeback.
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: You don't get strong roots on mountaintops, you get them in the dust.
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: You don't learn to listen when the crowd is loud, you learn in the quiet.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: And you don't become who you're made to be under spotlights.
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: You become that person when no one's watching and doubt is at full volume.
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: I remember a season when I felt like everything I'd built had come crashing down.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: My calendar was empty, I was divorced, alone.
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: My prayers felt like they were hitting the ceiling and bouncing back.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: I woke up one morning, sat on the edge of my bed and said God, I don't even know what to ask for anymore.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: No lightning, no burning bush.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: Just a whisper deep in my gut Keep walking.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: That's what you do in the wilderness.
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: You don't sprint, you don't pitch a tent and call it home.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: You walk, and even with sand in your shoes and tears in your eyes, even with doubt breathing down your neck.
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: Now let's talk about decision making.
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: During this limbo space, you want to wait until it's clear, until the fear is gone, until the doubt shuts up and certainty walks in, until the doubt shuts up and certainty walks in.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: But here's the truth bomb you will not feel 100% sure when you make a comeback move in this limbo stage.
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: You will still have doubt in the room, it will still be whispering, but doubt doesn't get the final say.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: You make the decision anyway.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: You trust what you've learned and, more importantly, you trust what you're learning.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: You trust who you're becoming through this transition.
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: As an Enneagram 6, and I know some of you can relate I have battled with second-guessing every major decision and choice.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: But part of growing up in my faith and growing up in my comeback is this I've learned to make decisions and trust that they're good.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: This is part of what I call doubt resilience.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: You make the decision and, without beating down the door, you act on the decision.
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: It's not perfect, it's not foolproof, it may not even work, but you're brave and you're trying.
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: If you're in the middle of limbo, I want to tell you something out loud and clear You're not stuck, you're not broken, you're not forgotten.
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: You are in the holy, gritty ground of the coming.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: God doesn't waste a wilderness season.
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: He uses it to build prophets and warriors, leaders and you.
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: He's forging your roots in this quiet.
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: He's forging your roots in this quiet, unseen space.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: And there's an edge to this desert.
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: There is a morning when the manna shows up.
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: There is a promised land and you're walking toward it, even when it feels like wandering.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: So if you're sitting in that messy middle between what was and what's not yet, know this, you're not crazy.
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: No-transcript.
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: You see, this is where comeback stories are born, alone and in the wilderness.
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: If today's episode hit home for you and you're ready to take that next step, even if you don't know exactly where it's leading, I'd love to walk with you.
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: The link to schedule a coaching call is in the show notes.
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: But let's build your comeback plan together, one decision and one step at a time, building doubt, resilience all along the way.
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: Keep walking.
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: I'll see you next time.
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: Hey, thanks for listening.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: I don't take it for granted that you're here.
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: You didn't listen by mistake.
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: If you want to reach out, you can DM me on Instagram at Tony Thrash Until next week.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: Remember, there's still time left on the clock.
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: Let's get you off the bench to start your comeback.
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: I want to give a special shout out to Country Club for the original music.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: You can find them on Instagram at country club.
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: You.