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Unleashing Confidence: Mastering the Art of Fearless Speaking With Melinda Lee · Speak In Flow

• 0:03
  Melinda Lee: Welcome, dear listeners, I'm so glad you're
• 0:06
  here. Today, we're going to talk about being visible,
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  consistently visible, consistently allowing the
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  authority figures, the people around you, your community, your
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  family members, to see you as the leader, the expert, the
• 0:27
  trusted partner, that you want them, to see you as they want to
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  see you as. So how do we do that, we're going to go into
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  some techniques to help you work through any of the blocks that
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  you have, that may be preventing you from allowing yourself to be
• 0:45
  seen. Because right now, it is the most important time more
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  than ever, to have leaders such as you rise to be seen, even
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  when you're afraid. consistently being visible. That means to
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  allow the eyes on you to allow lots of eyes on you and getting
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  super comfortable with that. And I know that that's a big stretch
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  could be a big challenge for some of you. And but that's why
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  you're here. That is why you're here to learn more about that
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  because we need you, your voice matters. So if 1020 People
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  frighten you start was one, start with just speaking up in
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  front of those meetings, start with speaking up to your manager
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  to your boss, being visible, and allowing them to see you as that
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  trusted expert speaking confidently, clearly,
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  articulately with power with with enthusiasm. Many people
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  want to as soon as they get into the spotlight, when all eyes are
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  on them, I see them start to just shrivel away. Or they
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  contract, right the nerves get in their body, and then they
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  start to contract and be somebody else. And it's like
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  right before they got into the spotlight, they were somebody
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  different. They were just them being them. And then when the
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  eyes are on them, they start to just contract and it breaks my
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  heart, it saddens me, because I know that we are so much more, I
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  know that your voice is a vehicle of impact a vehicle to
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  connect with others. And so don't hold back. The challenge
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  is most of us, we we have a lot on our plate. So being visible
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  may get pushed to the side. Right, you may have good
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  intentions to say I'm going to do more presentations. I'm going
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  to lead team meetings. But then sometimes work. You go back to
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  the office, there's ABC to do there's there's administrative
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  tasks, and then you get to go home and take a walk the dog
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  take care of the kids like there's a lot on our plates. And
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  then we get we push being visible to the side. And then we
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  work behind the curtains. And then sometimes when you're
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  sitting so, so busy behind the curtain doing all these tasks,
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  we some of your work may get unnoticed. People don't know
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  what you're doing. Right and they and then they start to
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  create assumptions, create stories. Stories that may be
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  untrue stories that that they form, what they want to create
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  in their mind. So there is huge repercussions and risks for not
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  communicating who you are, the experiences that you're having
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  what you are learning how you're overcoming challenges. Telling
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  your story, the way you see it. so other people can connect with
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  you and understand you and see the truth of who you are. Don't
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  hold back and stay behind the curtains because you know what's
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  going to happen one day, that curtain someone's going to knock
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  on your curtain. And then they're going to say hey, I'd
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  like for you to deliver a presentation tomorrow or next
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  week. And I might be in front of really important people could be
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  team leaders could be the executive C suite or an
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  important client. Are you ready? Really think about that right
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  now. If someone were to ask you to deliver an important
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  presentation in a couple of days. Are you ready? What is
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  happening in your body? Can you be as confident as you want to
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  be feel that in your body? Feel that in your heart? Can you be
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  as confident as you want to be? Can you rely on being
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  consistently confident? Can you rely on speaking and flow
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  speaking with your heart speaking with passion? Are you
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  thinking about? Am I gonna say the right thing? Am I going to I
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  probably will stumble, I probably will mess this up, and
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  I gotta practice and practice and rehearse. That's just your
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  inner critic, right? That's your fear mechanism. Because I know
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  you don't have to practice that much. You if you've been asked
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  to deliver a presentation, you know, your material. Telling
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  yourself I need to practice more is just a defence mechanism.
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  It's actually preventing you from really being the truth of
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  who you are, and being in flow, speaking with ease speaking with
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  confidence. So here are some techniques I'd like to share
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  with you today on how to be consistently visible,
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  consistently confident, consistently visible, it's
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  three, right? Create a schedule, speak with confidence with
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  power. And third is do it for somebody. So first, create a
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  schedule. Like I mentioned earlier, sometimes we go back to
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  administrative tasks are working behind the curtains, and people
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  may not see what you're doing. So create a schedule for
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  yourself. This week, I'm going to be visible one, two times,
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  I'm going to speak in the meeting, I'm going to talk to my
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  boss, or, or this week, I'm going to do a presentation. This
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  month, I'm wanting to deliver a webinar and have a consistent
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  schedule. I want you to know that this is not easy for me
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  doing these podcasts, creating videos. Just curious, do you
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  think this is easy for me? There was a moment in my past and I
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  couldn't even look at my own photos. I couldn't even look at
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  my videos, or I couldn't stand looking at them. But I worked
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  through my doubt, I worked I found the root causes of my
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  doubt work through them. And then now I'm here. And then what
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  I realised is being consistently visible showing up anyways,
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  works, right I started to become the expert, people started
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  seeing me because they trust me. And then I build influence. And
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  most importantly, I'm sharing the information and sharing what
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  I love sharing what I know, to connect with others. So build a
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  schedule that will keep you on track. And then to when you do
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  show up, show up powerfully. Select a time during the day
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  where you're not as tired, where you're feeling confident. Speak
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  with power. So use the techniques that I've shown you.
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  Take some breathe, do some breathing box, breathing, where
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  you inhale for four, hold it for four, and then exhale for four
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  and holds it for four. It's just like a box, inhale. Or hold it
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  234 exhale 234, hold it 234 Do the box breathing exercise
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  before you speak. And that will allow you to speak confidently
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  passionately. And finally, third, do it for somebody. Even
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  if you are not feeling well. Or even if you don't want to do it.
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  Think about who you're doing it for whether it's your family
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  member, whether it's your kids, if you're a minority out there
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  and a leader because we need more leaders like you to rise.
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  Do it for us. Do it for your fellow people. The people that
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  need you to rise we need more minorities up at the C suite up
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  at the seat at the table. More women. If you're a woman out
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  there, do it for the rest of us women. Do it for somebody
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  that will give you that courage to rise. Being a leader doesn't
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  mean that you have all your ducks in a row and you have all
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  your information you have everything down know being a
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  leader is being visible even in the unknown. And that is why I
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  say breathe through it. Speak with confidence even in the
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  unknown. Do it anyways, do it for others do it for your
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  people. But Phil, feel that courage inside of you, and
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  speak, speak your truth, speak and flow. So using those three
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  techniques will help you to be more consistently visible,
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  consistently confident. All right, first, set a schedule, do
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  it during a time during a day where you feel confident when
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  you feel good, not tired, overwhelmed. Use some breathing
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  techniques to speak purposefully speak with power breathing
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  techniques, get your body into a state where it's ready to speak.
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  Don't forget, your body's included. It's just not about
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  read, writing, what am I going to say? Writing all the talking
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  points. It's also including your body, getting into state using
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  techniques such as breathing, then finally do it for somebody,
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  do it for your fellow minority leaders, do it for women, do it
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  for your children, do it for your family connects to somebody
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  and do it for us. We need leaders more leaders who care
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  about people. And not just money or the bottom line, right,
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  that's just a symptom, that's just an outcome that naturally
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  happens when you care to lift others up. And when you know
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  that your voice is a vehicle for impact, you connect with others.
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  And when you connect with others, you raise a you raise
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  people up. And when you can raise people up, you're making a
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  positive difference in the world. Positive Change moving
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  the needle for the organisation for your community. And that is
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  the power of our voice. And so being seen doesn't mean you know
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  everything doesn't mean that you know what's about to happen.
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  being seen as a leader means that you do it anyways, despite
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  the uncertainty, the doubt the ambiguity, you do it, you go and
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  use the tools and techniques that I've shared with you today.
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  Be consistently seen allowing people to connect with you
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  connect with your eyes, connect and be okay with all eyes on
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  you. So okay to be in the spotlight. Because your voice
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  matters. You matter, you matter to us. And use your voice as a
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  vehicle for impact. Until the next episode, uh, dear
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  listeners, I'm so grateful for you continuing to listen. I
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  gotta notes that my this podcast has is a top 10% out of global
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  podcast for downloads. I had no idea. I kept showing up anyways,
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  do redoing these recordings, interviewing amazing leaders not
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  knowing whether anyone is listening. I continue to show up
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  be seen. And then here it is. Here's the the response that I'm
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  getting. So I am so grateful for you. Grateful for you to be
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  here. Continue to rise, speak in flow. When you do you're making
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  impact for yourself and for others. Until next time