Latest / The You Project / #1753 How Much Do You Want It? - Harps

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#1753 How Much Do You Want It? - Harps · The You Project

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Good a groovers, hope you bloody terrifics me, It's ups.
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  Speaker 1: Who else would it be. I want to talk to
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  Speaker 1: you today about a variable of the changing your life process,
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  Speaker 1: and that is essentially passion, drive, commitment, want, desire. So
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  Speaker 1: I'm calling this, I think I'm going to call this
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  Speaker 1: a little conversation how much do you want it? And
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  Speaker 1: the reason that I find this to be a particularly
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  Speaker 1: crucial question to ask is because there have been times
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  Speaker 1: in my life where I just didn't want the thing
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  Speaker 1: enough and I didn't get it, and I didn't do it.
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  Speaker 1: I kind of wanted it. I kind of wanted to
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  Speaker 1: do that or change that, or earn that, or own
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  Speaker 1: that or address that, or I kind of did but
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  Speaker 1: three out of ten kind of wanting to do it
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  Speaker 1: is never going to get me any kind of quality result.
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  Speaker 1: And over the years, I've worked with lots of people,
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  Speaker 1: individuals and teams, and invariably at some point it comes
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  Speaker 1: to the do you really this is going to be hard, probably,
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  Speaker 1: this is going to be inconveniently uncomfortable, and all of
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  Speaker 1: those things. So how much do you want to do?
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  Speaker 1: You kind of want to do this? Do you want
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  Speaker 1: to do it? A bit? Do you kind of six
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  Speaker 1: out of ten want to do it, or do you
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  Speaker 1: really really want to do this? Because if we have
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  Speaker 1: everything else, but we don't have the drive, we don't
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  Speaker 1: have the focus, we don't have the intention of doing
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  Speaker 1: the work despite the pain, despite all of those things
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  Speaker 1: that come with building success, Like there needs to be
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  Speaker 1: a high level commitment despite all of those things that
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  Speaker 1: could get in our way. And so, you know, there's
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  Speaker 1: been many times where I've said to people to think
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  Speaker 1: about it, because I sense that they have the ability.
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  Speaker 1: I sense that they have good potential. Sometimes I sense
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  Speaker 1: that they do want to change that thing or overcome
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  Speaker 1: that thing, or create that thing, or succeed at a
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  Speaker 1: certain thing. But I also get a really strong sense
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  Speaker 1: that they don't want it enough. And those big things,
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  Speaker 1: those life changing those transformational things, those change the direction
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  Speaker 1: of your life things. Generally, these are not things that
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  Speaker 1: come quickly, easily or painlessly, and there is an level
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  Speaker 1: of effort and focus and commitment and courage that is
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  Speaker 1: required that truthfully, a lot of people just don't have
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  Speaker 1: or they don't have often. And there been times when
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  Speaker 1: that's been me. There's been times where I kind of
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  Speaker 1: wanted something, but I didn't really, really, really fucking desperately
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  Speaker 1: want that, and I wasn't really genuinely prepared to do
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  Speaker 1: what was required to create it that you know in
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  Speaker 1: the back of my mind. And so you know, there's
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  Speaker 1: a few variables around this. I can only speak while
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  Speaker 1: I can speak more broadly, but I'll speak for me
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  Speaker 1: right now. So there came a time in my life
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  Speaker 1: where and there have come a few times where something
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  Speaker 1: happened in my life. The first one, obviously they were
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  Speaker 1: spoken about too many times, was when I was a
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  Speaker 1: fat kid and I had a little bit of momentary
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  Speaker 1: trauma around being the fat kid, the fatest kid at school.
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  Speaker 1: And that, as painful as that was, that was a catalyst.
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  Speaker 1: That was an emotional tipping point for me to really
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  Speaker 1: genuinely want to and not only want to, but be
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  Speaker 1: ready to do whatever was required to change my body,
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  Speaker 1: to change my thinking, to change my appearance, to change
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  Speaker 1: my weight, to change my habits, to change my relationship
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  Speaker 1: with food, to change the way that I looked and
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  Speaker 1: feeled and functioned and socialized and existed, to create a
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  Speaker 1: new operating system, to create new habits, to be different,
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  Speaker 1: do different for me. That all came from an experience
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  Speaker 1: of pain and for better or worse. Sometimes for many
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  Speaker 1: of us, often we don't have the level of commitment
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  Speaker 1: or focus or passion required until the shit hits the fan.
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  Speaker 1: And so I'm always suggesting to people, please do not
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  Speaker 1: wait for the catastrophe someone says to me. So when
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  Speaker 1: someone says to me, I want to build a brand
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  Speaker 1: or a business, or I want to open a this
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  Speaker 1: or open to that, or I want to achieve that
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  Speaker 1: or change that, or write a book, or you know,
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  Speaker 1: get a six pack or whatever the thing is, whatever
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  Speaker 1: means something to you. Before I go too far down
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  Speaker 1: the conversational pipeline or the goal setting and the structure
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  Speaker 1: and all those things, I ask them how much they
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  Speaker 1: want it, And I'm more interested in their physiology and
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  Speaker 1: their energy than their words when they respond, Because people
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  Speaker 1: can say to me, oh, no, I really want it.
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  Speaker 1: I know they don't. Really, that's that you don't. No,
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  Speaker 1: you don't like this needs to be something because we're not.
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  Speaker 1: Often we're not talking about a small thing. Like I
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  Speaker 1: said before, it's not painless, not quick, not fast, not easy,
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  Speaker 1: not sexy. Sometimes the shit that we need to do
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  Speaker 1: to literally reinvent ourselves, to create a new operating system
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  Speaker 1: and habits and outcomes. It ultimately comes down to how
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  Speaker 1: fucking driven we are, how passionate, how hard we were
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  Speaker 1: working for how long, how often we will roll up
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  Speaker 1: our sleeves, fall down, get back up, fall down, get
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  Speaker 1: back up, fuck up, step up, fuck up, step up.
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  Speaker 1: I think you know this sounds funny, but I feel like,
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  Speaker 1: in some ways, mediocrity is a gift. I've said this
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  Speaker 1: a couple of times on air. But for me, not
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  Speaker 1: being super intelligent, not being super gifted, not having great genetics,
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  Speaker 1: not being a natural at most things, for me, that
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  Speaker 1: meant I had to work. So that built in me
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  Speaker 1: a work ethic, that built in me a mindset of
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  Speaker 1: being okay with doing hard things and persevering. Because if
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  Speaker 1: I didn't do hard things and persevere in the middle
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  Speaker 1: of those hard things, you know, I would not succeed.
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  Speaker 1: I would not create the things I've created. I wouldn't
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  Speaker 1: have done you know, I wouldn't have written seven books.
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  Speaker 1: I wouldn't have traveled all over the world and spoken.
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  Speaker 1: I wouldn't have worked on teley and radio, and I
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  Speaker 1: wouldn't do the things that I've done had I not
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  Speaker 1: been genuinely ready to do the work and had I
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  Speaker 1: not wanted it enough. And I don't say any of
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  Speaker 1: those achievements proudly. I say them because they are just
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  Speaker 1: consequences of me getting in pain. They are consequences of
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  Speaker 1: me working really fucking hard and starting as a white belt.
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  Speaker 1: They are consequences of me stuffing up, fucking up repeatedly, repeatedly, repeating,
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  Speaker 1: and then eventually developing some awareness and skill and understanding
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  Speaker 1: and competence and getting better over time. But if it
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  Speaker 1: was only about success and comfort, I never would have
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  Speaker 1: got here. And so you know, it comes down to
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  Speaker 1: what we're prepared to do to get what we want.
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  Speaker 1: You know, we all have an idea in our head
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  Speaker 1: of who we want to be and how we want
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  Speaker 1: to be and what we want to do be, create, change,
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  Speaker 1: build what we want our life to look like, and
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  Speaker 1: our relationships and our body and our health and our
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  Speaker 1: bank balance and all of these components of the human
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  Speaker 1: experience that we wax lyrical about. We all have an
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  Speaker 1: idea of what we want. The question is not so
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  Speaker 1: much what do you want, but what are you prepared
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  Speaker 1: to do to get what you want? How much do
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  Speaker 1: you want it? And how hard will you work? For it.
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  Speaker 1: We'll be back in a minute. All right, we're back.
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  Speaker 1: Thanks for listening. I hope you got something out of that.
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  Speaker 1: And of course the obvious question for today is what's
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  Speaker 1: the thing that you want? What do you really want?
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  Speaker 1: In the words of the Spice girls, tell me what
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  Speaker 1: you want, what you really really want, and then, more importantly,
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  Speaker 1: in the words of me, how much do you want it?
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  Speaker 1: And what are you prepared to do to get it?
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  Speaker 1: See you next time.