Latest / Movie Meltdown / Attack of the Killer Soundtrack: Holiday Edition

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Attack of the Killer Soundtrack: Holiday Edition · Movie Meltdown

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Guess who? It's 10 o'clock.
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: Do you care where your parents are?
• 0:08
  Speaker 3: The following program is a special presentation.
• 0:12
  Speaker 4: The following feature has been rated R by the Motion
• 0:15
  Speaker 4: Picture Association of America. It is intended for mature audiences
• 0:18
  Speaker 4: and parental discretion is advised.
• 0:23
  Speaker 5: This is an emergency alert.
• 0:28
  Speaker 6: Defense Corps forces reported just moments ago.
• 0:34
  Speaker 7: This is not a drill.
• 0:35
  Speaker 8: Repeat, this is not a drill.
• 0:37
  Speaker 9: At this time, we are requesting the immediate and orderly
• 0:42
  Speaker 9: evacuation of the vicinity.
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: The Coast Guard and the Navy have been alerted and
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: are standing.
• 0:47
  Speaker 5: By on the eastern seaboard.
• 0:49
  Speaker 10: It continues to burn out of control.
• 0:52
  Speaker 7: It has been regular.
• 0:53
  Speaker 11: Every five to ten minutes, there has been another convoy
• 0:55
  Speaker 11: of units, fire companies, paramedics. A citywide emergency has been declared.
• 1:01
  Speaker 12: Police officers are still on tactical full alert.
• 1:04
  Speaker 13: 2,000 National Guardsmen are standing by.
• 1:07
  Speaker 8: Air defense warning read.
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: It's time for Movie Meltdown's Attack of the Killers soundtrack.
• 1:16
  Speaker 10: The live transmission has begun. And we're into the final
• 1:20
  Speaker 10: hour of hell.
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: What's up and welcome to Movie Meltdown's Attack of the
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: Killers soundtrack. I'm Brian, your Yuletide host. And with that
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: I will say happy holidays, or as we say on
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: this show... Happy Life Day. Now, I always enjoy these
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: music-themed episodes, but recently we had so much fun with
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: the Halloween-themed music episode that I thought this was a
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: good chance to put together the end-of-the-year holidays, or Christmas,
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: or whatever. That's why I'm going with Life Day. I
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: don't care about any of this nonsense. But anyway, a
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: holiday-themed group of songs, specifically with movie tie-ins, or at
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: least our holiday favorites from years past. A few other
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: projects might creep in there as we go along. But
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: I thought we would start off with a traditional song,
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: but from a different place. I have a very different
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: take on Christmas, specifically Christmas movies. You know, I guess
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: Christmas songs are sort of, you know, they just sort
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: of empower you at that time of year. Whether you
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: like it or not, you may fight it. But if so,
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: this may be the wrong episode for you. But in general,
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: you're sort of overwhelmed with Christmas songs. songs, but I
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: always tie them to movies. No surprise there. But it's
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: not always the movies that everybody else does. It's not
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: necessarily the traditional ones. I'm usually more of the action route.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: And oddly enough with my Christmas themed. So with this
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: one I thought we would open the show the way
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: one of my favorite holiday themed movies opens. That would
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: be Lethal Weapon. And as you watch the credits and
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: sort of easier way into the plot of this Richard
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: Donner classic, you start off with none other than Jingle
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: Bell Rock, performed by Bobby Helms.
• 3:30
  Speaker 14: Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock. Jingle bells swing
• 3:36
  Speaker 14: and jingle bells ring.
• 3:38
  Speaker 15: Snowing and blowing up.
• 3:40
  Speaker 7: Bushels of fun.
• 3:43
  Speaker 16: Now the jingle hop has begun.
• 3:46
  Speaker 14: Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock. Jingle bells timing,
• 3:52
  Speaker 14: jingle bell time.
• 3:54
  Speaker 16: Dancing and prancing in jingle bell square.
• 3:59
  Speaker 15: In the frost.
• 4:02
  Speaker 16: Jingle bell time is a swell time.
• 4:14
  Speaker 15: To go gliding in the one horse sleigh.
• 4:18
  Speaker 16: Giddy up, jingle horse, pick up your feet. Jingle up
• 4:23
  Speaker 16: around the clock. Mix and a-mingle in the jingling feet.
• 4:30
  Speaker 16: That's the Jingle Bell Rock.
• 4:34
  Speaker 15: Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock. Jingle bell chime.
• 4:40
  Speaker 9: In jingle bell time Dancing and prancing in jingle bell
• 4:45
  Speaker 9: square In the frosty air.
• 4:49
  Speaker 16: What a bright time, it's the right time To rock
• 4:55
  Speaker 16: the night away Jingle bell time is a swell time
• 5:02
  Speaker 16: To go glidin' in the one-horse sleigh Giddy-up, jingle horse,
• 5:08
  Speaker 16: pick up your feet Jingle around the clock Mix and
• 5:15
  Speaker 16: a-mingle in the jinglin' feet That's the jingle bell, that's
• 5:21
  Speaker 16: the jingle bell That's the jingle.
• 5:24
  Speaker 15: Bell rock.
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: Let's do what one shepherd said to the other shepherd.
• 5:30
  Speaker 17: What?
• 5:30
  Speaker 15: Let's get the.
• 5:31
  Speaker 18: Flock out of here.
• 5:32
  Speaker 15: Ah, Riggs.
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: He had so much promise back then. The depths that
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: he has fallen these days. Anyway, speaking of going dark,
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: my next entry, this is another one that I initially
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: thought of when I came up with this. I was
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: just going with some of my favorite Christmas movies and
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: my favorite ways that they tie in music and sometimes taking...
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: a holiday classic or a very traditional holiday song and
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: working into a very untraditional film or scene. One of
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: my favorites is the way that they use the traditional
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: Christmas carol idea in Black Christmas. Yes, this is the
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: original Black Christmas. And yeah, it's just so well shot. Again,
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: You can go back. We've done an entire episode on
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: Black Christmas. And you'll hear me go on about how
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: underrated Bob Clark is as the director. But the way
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: that he uses this scene where the carolers come to
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: the door and she goes to watch them and sort
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: of enjoy this classic holiday setting. And in the next room,
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: someone's being stabbed to death with a big crystal unicorn.
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: It just does this great job of sort of cross-cutting
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: with shots of the, by the way, creepy looking kids.
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: these weird 70s kids standing out there singing, and you
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: get these big close-ups of their faces as they're singing,
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: and you get these shots of the kids, and then
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: it will cut over immediately to shots of the stabbing
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: or blood dripping off of the crystal unicorn. It's just
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: so well put together, and it gives you this very
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: uneasy feeling, a lot of which I think stems from
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: this very traditional song. So this is just going to
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: be a little snippet of it here. I just wanted
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: to throw some in because it is one of my
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: favorite uses of music in a holiday-themed movie and a
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: creepy one at that. So this is a few snippets
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: of it together because this is actually from the movie,
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: so you'll get nice sounds of the stabbing and the
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: weird creepy guy. So it's a good little mixture of
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: what you get in the film itself. But the song is,
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: O Come All Ye Faithful from St. Simon's Choir is actually,
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: I guess, those creepy little kids that were out there.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: So let's hear a little of that.
• 7:46
  Speaker 19: O come and behold him.
• 7:52
  Speaker 20: Born the King of Angels. O come, let us adore him.
• 8:02
  Speaker 20: O come, let us adore him.
• 8:09
  Speaker 15: O come, let.
• 8:11
  Speaker 20: Us adore him. Christ the Lord. Sing, choirs of angels.
• 8:53
  Speaker 19: Shh!
• 8:54
  Speaker 21: Shh!
• 9:25
  Speaker 20: Yea, Lord, we praise thee.
• 9:32
  Speaker 22: Agnes.
• 9:33
  Speaker 15: Agnes, it's me, Billy. It's all right, Agnes.
• 9:41
  Speaker 23: It's all right.
• 9:43
  Speaker 21: Shh.
• 9:44
  Speaker 4: Pretty Agnes.
• 9:47
  Speaker 15: Lord of the.
• 9:52
  Speaker 22: Uh-huh.
• 9:52
  Speaker 19: Uh-huh.
• 9:52
  Speaker 22: I can't tell what we did.
• 10:26
  Speaker 17: Friends, here's a wonderful Christmas gift for anyone who smokes.
• 10:31
  Speaker 17: Because it says, Merry Christmas and Happy Smoking 200 times. Yes,
• 10:37
  Speaker 17: ten packs of those better-tasting Luckys, all done up for
• 10:40
  Speaker 17: Christmas in a beautiful carton created just for Lucky Strike
• 10:44
  Speaker 17: by the famous designer, Mr.
• 10:46
  Speaker 24: Raymond Loy.
• 10:46
  Speaker 17: It'll look so bright and colorful under your Christmas tree,
• 10:50
  Speaker 17: and it's such a welcome gift to anyone who enjoys
• 10:53
  Speaker 17: a good smoke. Because, you know, smoking enjoyment is all
• 10:57
  Speaker 17: a matter of taste. And the fact of the matter is,
• 11:00
  Speaker 17: Luckys taste better. Cleaner, fresher, smoother. That's why you can't
• 11:06
  Speaker 17: go wrong if you remember your friends with these colorful
• 11:10
  Speaker 17: Christmas cartons of Lucky Strike.
• 11:13
  Speaker 8: Be happy, go lucky, for Christmas.
• 11:17
  Speaker 15: Gifts this year.
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: Alright, well now I've done a few picks of my own,
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: but again, what I said I liked so much about
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: the Halloween episode we did was I... threw it out
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: there to the group. I got some of our usual
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: crew together and just had them pick some songs. And
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: if you listen to that episode, it is quite a
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: mixture of music. And I thought, well, what if we
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: did that with Christmas and see what weird conglomeration of
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: music they come up with? So this is just a
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: mixture of a couple of times lately when I've sat
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: down with people, the first of which we're going to
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: go with one that is a recent pick that Bo made.
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: And we'll hear his take, kind of similar to what
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: I was just saying about taking a classic song and
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: working it into a horrific film.
• 12:04
  Speaker 25: I would say it's the Do You Hear What I
• 12:06
  Speaker 25: Hear from Gremlins. Because that's such a creepy use of
• 12:10
  Speaker 25: a Christmas song, and that was something where my parents
• 12:13
  Speaker 25: rented it for us when we were young, so I'm
• 12:15
  Speaker 25: seeing it at like age five. And just all that,
• 12:18
  Speaker 25: I mean, that was, I mean, that's one of those
• 12:20
  Speaker 25: things that sort of push you know gave her one
• 12:22
  Speaker 25: to push to move to like pg-13 because you know
• 12:24
  Speaker 25: that was pg but she's blowing the one up in
• 12:26
  Speaker 25: the microwave she's stabbing the other with the butcher knife
• 12:29
  Speaker 25: and it's going into um the blender and they're still
• 12:32
  Speaker 25: like attacking her and it's just it's such a perfectly
• 12:35
  Speaker 25: used song i love it now how it's used but
• 12:38
  Speaker 25: just i don't know just something about like christmas music
• 12:41
  Speaker 25: is just kind of odd and off-putting a lot of
• 12:44
  Speaker 25: it when you get right down to it Do you.
• 12:47
  Speaker 15: Hear what I hear? Do you hear what I hear?
• 12:53
  Speaker 5: Said the night wind to the little lamb. Do you
• 12:59
  Speaker 5: see what I see?
• 13:01
  Speaker 15: Do you see what I see?
• 13:04
  Speaker 5: Way up in the sky, little lamb.
• 13:09
  Speaker 12: Do you see what I see?
• 13:14
  Speaker 26: A star, a star, dancing in the night.
• 13:19
  Speaker 27: With a tail as big as.
• 13:22
  Speaker 5: A kite With a tail as big as a kite
• 13:31
  Speaker 5: Said the little lamb to the shepherd boy.
• 13:38
  Speaker 14: Do you hear what I hear?
• 13:42
  Speaker 5: Ringing through the sky, shepherd boy Do you hear what
• 13:50
  Speaker 5: I hear? A song, a song, high above.
• 13:56
  Speaker 27: The tree With a voice as big as the sea
• 14:02
  Speaker 27: with a voice as big as the sea.
• 14:10
  Speaker 5: Said the shepherd boy to the mighty king do.
• 14:16
  Speaker 28: You know what i know in your palace warm mighty
• 14:23
  Speaker 28: king do.
• 14:26
  Speaker 29: You know what i.
• 14:30
  Speaker 5: A child, a child shivers in the cold Let us
• 14:36
  Speaker 5: bring him silver and gold Let us bring him silver.
• 14:43
  Speaker 15: And gold.
• 14:53
  Speaker 26: Said the king to the people everywhere Listen to what
• 15:01
  Speaker 26: I say Pray for peace, people everywhere.
• 15:09
  Speaker 5: Listen to what I say The child, the child sleeping
• 15:18
  Speaker 5: in the night He will bring us goodness and light
• 15:24
  Speaker 5: He will.
• 15:25
  Speaker 28: Bring us goodness.
• 15:38
  Speaker 30: I'm speaking of that scene in gremlins.
• 16:01
  Speaker 6: We just showed that to my kids recently, the gremlins. And, um,
• 16:06
  Speaker 6: They didn't find the gremlins as cute, you know, mogwai,
• 16:10
  Speaker 6: the unaltered ones as.
• 16:12
  Speaker 7: Cute as I thought they would. But that's beside the point.
• 16:15
  Speaker 6: I was kind of shocked to see, I think, how
• 16:20
  Speaker 6: almost eager the mother is to kill the gremlins. She's
• 16:25
  Speaker 6: ready for it.
• 16:26
  Speaker 19: Oh, yeah.
• 16:26
  Speaker 6: She hears them and she's got the knife out and
• 16:28
  Speaker 6: she's like, it's on. I'm going to kill these guys.
• 16:31
  Speaker 6: And there's no hesitation. There's almost no fear in her.
• 16:33
  Speaker 6: She's just ready like a killing machine immediately.
• 16:37
  Speaker 7: She's pretty badass for a mom lady. She's pretty hardcore.
• 16:43
  Speaker 6: I remembered her being so much more maybe scared or
• 16:49
  Speaker 6: terrified by them and then she reacts and then she
• 16:53
  Speaker 6: overcomes and kills them. No, it's right away she knows
• 16:56
  Speaker 6: what's happening and she just flat out kills them. She
• 16:59
  Speaker 6: picks them off like Like the Predator or something.
• 17:02
  Speaker 3: It says, bam, bam, bam.
• 17:05
  Speaker 13: This is Zach Galligan, and you're listening to Movie Meltdown.
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: And that was Greg there, adding his... commentary about his
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: more recent re-watching of the film and trying to pass
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: it on to the next generation, as I think we should.
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: We should scar our children the way that we were
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: scarred as youth.
• 17:39
  Speaker 30: Utes.
• 17:40
  Speaker 10: Did you say Utes?
• 17:41
  Speaker 2: Okay, so now we're going to check in with our
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: most recent holiday gathering, and I sat everyone down and
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: once again had them choose their songs. So we're just
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: going to check in there from time to time, and
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: I'll probably add a little something as we go along.
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: There's been a few things I've had to clarify and
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: specify after the fact, so I'll check back in from
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: time to time with some extra information on the songs
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: we're about to play. But with that, let's check into
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: our most recent holiday party and see what song choices
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: they come up with. All right, so we are here.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: We're doing our songs. We have Ben, our man from
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: Tower of Technobabble here. What is your choice for this
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: holiday festive song-filled episode?
• 18:37
  Speaker 10: I got the email with the homework assignment on it.
• 18:39
  Speaker 10: You know, a holiday song and a movie. And I
• 18:43
  Speaker 10: don't have many holiday traditions, but I always try to
• 18:47
  Speaker 10: watch Santa Claus Conquers the Martians. But I always watch
• 18:51
  Speaker 10: the Mystery Science Theater version. It's my favorite version.
• 18:53
  Speaker 7: Because they make everything better.
• 18:55
  Speaker 10: And in the middle of this episode, and this was from...
• 19:01
  Speaker 10: I think this episode was in their third season around 91.
• 19:03
  Speaker 24: It was.
• 19:05
  Speaker 10: When everything was just working.
• 19:06
  Speaker 7: On that show. Because those first couple seasons are kind
• 19:09
  Speaker 7: of rough.
• 19:09
  Speaker 10: No, no. This is when it was really good.
• 19:11
  Speaker 7: They hit their stride by a three and four.
• 19:13
  Speaker 10: Like Mike Nelson was writing the jokes and Joel Hogson
• 19:17
  Speaker 10: was saying the jokes. And you had the definitive Crow
• 19:20
  Speaker 10: and Tom. Everything was just great. And in the middle
• 19:22
  Speaker 10: of this episode was a song that had nothing to
• 19:25
  Speaker 10: do with the actual movie.
• 19:28
  Speaker 32: Crow.
• 19:29
  Speaker 10: decided he wanted to have a brand new Christmas carol,
• 19:32
  Speaker 10: and he called it Let's Have a Patrick Swayze Christmas.
• 19:35
  Speaker 7: I'm familiar with this.
• 19:36
  Speaker 11: Oh, and it's just the best thing ever, you know?
• 19:39
  Speaker 10: And the funny thing is, they wrote the song because
• 19:44
  Speaker 10: at the time on cable, the movie Roadhouse was being
• 19:48
  Speaker 10: played over and over and over again.
• 19:50
  Speaker 7: It still is today.
• 19:51
  Speaker 10: And I didn't have cable growing up, and I had
• 19:54
  Speaker 10: never seen Roadhouse. So I was watching the song and
• 19:58
  Speaker 10: hearing all the jokes and not really getting it, but
• 20:00
  Speaker 10: just liking the song. So then years later, when I
• 20:02
  Speaker 10: finally did see the movie Roadhouse– I kept thinking back
• 20:06
  Speaker 10: to this song. I'm like, oh, so that's what that
• 20:07
  Speaker 10: lyric meant when he tears out his throat.
• 20:10
  Speaker 7: It all makes sense now. I love it. Just like
• 20:13
  Speaker 7: in the song. The whole time I could just see, yeah.
• 20:17
  Speaker 10: But it's such a great song. Santa will be our
• 20:20
  Speaker 10: new regular Saturday night thing.
• 20:22
  Speaker 3: I love it.
• 20:27
  Speaker 7: Nice choice. Thank you.
• 20:28
  Speaker 2: I think it's kind of hot to be wearing these scarves.
• 20:31
  Speaker 29: Oh, well, the scarves are a must. You can't go
• 20:33
  Speaker 29: caroling without a scarf. Catch your death.
• 20:35
  Speaker 33: Man, you were like one of those kids I remember
• 20:37
  Speaker 33: in high school that used to sell the most candy
• 20:40
  Speaker 33: bars for the marching band.
• 20:41
  Speaker 29: Yeah, and you'd be president of the swing choir, too. Thanks,
• 20:44
  Speaker 29: Joe Robinson. Thanks, Tom Servo.
• 20:46
  Speaker 7: I'm going to kiss up this guy.
• 20:47
  Speaker 29: Okay, now, if you'll all look at your sheet music,
• 20:49
  Speaker 29: we can rehearse my new song.
• 20:51
  Speaker 7: You wrote a Christmas song?
• 20:52
  Speaker 29: Hey, there's no tradition like a new tradition. Wait a minute,
• 20:55
  Speaker 29: let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas? Yeah, yeah, based on
• 20:58
  Speaker 29: my favorite movie, Roadhouse. Come on, what the heck does
• 21:00
  Speaker 29: Patrick Swayze have to do with Christmas? Hey, you keep
• 21:02
  Speaker 29: Christmas in your way and let me keep it in mine, okay?
• 21:05
  Speaker 7: Come on, sir, it seems like a nice enough sentiment.
• 21:07
  Speaker 7: We can give it a shot.
• 21:08
  Speaker 29: All right, okay, okay. 12-8 time, key of A-flat major. Cambod,
• 21:13
  Speaker 29: shoot him the tune. Okay, you'll just have to stay
• 21:15
  Speaker 29: with me, everybody, okay? All your parts are written out.
• 21:18
  Speaker 29: Let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas by Crow T. Robot.
• 21:22
  Speaker 7: Paul, let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas?
• 21:26
  Speaker 10: Right.
• 21:26
  Speaker 29: Hit it, Cam-bot. Oh, oh, I start.
• 21:30
  Speaker 34: I get it.
• 21:30
  Speaker 4: I'm sorry.
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: Okay, pick it up.
• 21:34
  Speaker 12: Open up your heart and let the Patrick Swayze Christmas in.
• 21:41
  Speaker 23: We'll gather at the roadhouse with our next of kin.
• 21:46
  Speaker 15: Not bad.
• 21:47
  Speaker 33: And Santa can be our regular Saturday night thing.
• 21:54
  Speaker 35: We'll decorate a bar stool and gather round and sing.
• 22:00
  Speaker 12: Oh, let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas this year.
• 22:08
  Speaker 29: Or we'll tear your throat out and kick you in
• 22:13
  Speaker 29: the ear. Hold it, hold it.
• 22:15
  Speaker 7: Can I stop it?
• 22:17
  Speaker 33: I don't know if I think this is an appropriate
• 22:19
  Speaker 33: sentiment anymore for Christmas.
• 22:21
  Speaker 29: Hey, what, like a good action sequence don't belong at Christmas?
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: Well, no, it's just that I've never heard of an
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: action sequence in a Christmas carol before.
• 22:29
  Speaker 29: Well, then grab hold of your socks and read on,
• 22:31
  Speaker 29: Joe Robinson. Okay, pick it up from measure 20, Canbot.
• 22:36
  Speaker 7: Lovely intro, though, very tasteful.
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 22:41
  Speaker 12: It's my way or the highway that's Christmas at my bar.
• 22:48
  Speaker 29: I'll have to smash your kneecaps if you bastards touch
• 22:53
  Speaker 29: my car.
• 22:55
  Speaker 33: I got the word that Santa has been stealing from
• 23:00
  Speaker 33: the till.
• 23:01
  Speaker 35: I think that that right jolly old elf better make
• 23:06
  Speaker 35: out his will. Oh, let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas
• 23:13
  Speaker 35: one and all.
• 23:15
  Speaker 15: And this can be the haziest... How long before it
• 23:21
  Speaker 15: becomes a standard?
• 23:23
  Speaker 9: I think you've got to come with me.
• 23:28
  Speaker 36: Come on.
• 23:52
  Speaker 2: Ah, so yes, the classic that is a Patrick Swayze Christmas.
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: That is a nice choice from Ben, and what's funny
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: is he immediately, like after we recorded that, the next
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: day he sent me a link, and it was so
• 24:06
  Speaker 2: awesome that I thought I should also share this with you.
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: What he sent over was a version that he had found,
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: because that was the classic version as done on Mystery
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: Science Theater 3000. But since then, it's become such a
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: classic that he found a version that is done by
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: a professional choir, and it was all supervised by Joel
• 24:28
  Speaker 2: Hodgson himself. So here is the choir version of A
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: Patrick Swayze Christmas. Thank you to Ben for sending this
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: over to share with all of you.
• 24:37
  Speaker 9: Joy to the world, America!
• 24:43
  Speaker 15: Open up your heart and.
• 24:45
  Speaker 16: Let the Patrick Swayze Christmas Inn gather at their own
• 24:51
  Speaker 16: house with our next of kin.
• 24:54
  Speaker 15: Next of kin.
• 24:55
  Speaker 9: Santa can be our regular Saturday, I think. Decorate up
• 25:02
  Speaker 9: our stool and gather round and sing.
• 25:06
  Speaker 22: Oh, let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas this year.
• 25:12
  Speaker 15: Or we'll tear your throat out and kick you in
• 25:16
  Speaker 15: the ear.
• 25:19
  Speaker 12: It's my way or the highway, this Christmas.
• 25:23
  Speaker 15: At my bar.
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: You'll have to smash your kneecaps if you bastards touch
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: my car.
• 25:31
  Speaker 15: Touch my car!
• 25:32
  Speaker 31: What a word that Santa has been stealing from the till.
• 25:37
  Speaker 31: I think that that bright jolly old elf better make
• 25:41
  Speaker 31: out his will.
• 25:43
  Speaker 22: Oh, let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas.
• 25:47
  Speaker 15: One and all. This will be the haziest.
• 25:52
  Speaker 13: Pain don't hurt.
• 25:55
  Speaker 15: This will be the laziest. Nice until it's time not
• 25:59
  Speaker 15: to be nice.
• 26:00
  Speaker 22: This will be the sweetest Christmas.
• 26:06
  Speaker 19: Of them.
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: All.
• 26:10
  Speaker 19: La, la, la, la, la, la, la.
• 26:12
  Speaker 17: It stinks.
• 26:18
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• 26:23
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• 26:45
  Speaker 15: Tweaked Audio.
• 26:46
  Speaker 3: Sounds better.
• 26:49
  Speaker 7: All right, Fred, what do you have for us?
• 26:52
  Speaker 11: Oh, I'm torn. That's tough.
• 26:56
  Speaker 7: It doesn't have to be the definitive one. It can
• 26:58
  Speaker 7: just be A1. Just choose one.
• 27:02
  Speaker 11: The one that really sort of, I guess, has the
• 27:07
  Speaker 11: most resonance for me. I want to pick the Grinch
• 27:12
  Speaker 11: song because I love the Grinch song, but I can't.
• 27:16
  Speaker 37: They're all Ravenscroft.
• 27:18
  Speaker 35: Yeah.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 27:19
  Speaker 11: It's just such a fabulous song. It was on my
• 27:22
  Speaker 11: list of attainable goals, things that I could actually conceivably
• 27:26
  Speaker 11: get done to learn those lyrics. I still haven't done it.
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: But can you say they're great? Because that kind of
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: covers it, really.
• 27:37
  Speaker 11: Yeah, you just remember the basics, you know. But I'm
• 27:41
  Speaker 11: going to have to go with Frosty the Snowman. Because
• 27:46
  Speaker 11: it's the one that, like, when I really felt like
• 27:49
  Speaker 11: I understood Hamlet and the invasion of the body snatchers,
• 27:56
  Speaker 11: it all went back to my feelings about Frosty the Snowman.
• 27:59
  Speaker 11: And there are a lot of tie-ins, obvious tie-ins, from
• 28:02
  Speaker 11: Hamlet to Frosty the Snowman.
• 28:06
  Speaker 37: Sure, we don't have to go down this road again.
• 28:08
  Speaker 31: Yeah.
• 28:08
  Speaker 9: Yeah.
• 28:10
  Speaker 11: Oh, that this too-too's solid flesh would thaw, melt, resolve.
• 28:15
  Speaker 11: He's kind of a snow golem, isn't he? Yeah. But
• 28:23
  Speaker 11: I just remember actually imagining the lyrics. And there are
• 28:26
  Speaker 11: some weird things in the lyrics. There's some sort of
• 28:28
  Speaker 11: traffic cop incident. I don't know what that's all about. Frosty.
• 28:34
  Speaker 11: But the whole idea is they build a snowman.
• 28:38
  Speaker 31: Yeah.
• 28:39
  Speaker 11: Put a hat on him. He comes to life. It
• 28:43
  Speaker 11: just spooked me, as many things did, the idea that
• 28:47
  Speaker 11: he'd be back again next year. And like every other
• 28:50
  Speaker 11: kid in the world, I knew that no two snowflakes
• 28:56
  Speaker 11: are alike. So next year they're going to go out
• 29:00
  Speaker 11: and they're going to build another snowman and look into
• 29:04
  Speaker 11: his face. Dead eyes.
• 29:06
  Speaker 13: Just dead coal eyes.
• 29:08
  Speaker 11: And they've got the hat. And all they have to
• 29:12
  Speaker 11: do is think twice for a second. And they're like, oh, no.
• 29:16
  Speaker 11: I mean, Frosty's gone, isn't he?
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: Oh, God.
• 29:24
  Speaker 11: We've been believing all this. But now that when it
• 29:27
  Speaker 11: comes to the moment, they're going to go, no, this
• 29:30
  Speaker 11: isn't Frosty. This is Lumpy the Snowman. Somebody who knows
• 29:34
  Speaker 11: who this is.
• 29:35
  Speaker 24: Who knows?
• 29:36
  Speaker 11: We're gonna put the hat on this he might be
• 29:38
  Speaker 11: a nice guy sure.
• 29:39
  Speaker 10: He's right that jimmy durrani has a lot to answer
• 29:42
  Speaker 10: for this is.
• 29:43
  Speaker 11: Terrifying but he's or it's like invasion of the body
• 29:47
  Speaker 11: snatchers even if he says hi hello happy birthday whatever
• 29:52
  Speaker 11: the fuck he says um what if he just doesn't
• 29:56
  Speaker 11: seem the same you know it.
• 30:00
  Speaker 10: Well, we replace ourselves every seven years.
• 30:03
  Speaker 9: Yeah.
• 30:03
  Speaker 3: You know, so.
• 30:04
  Speaker 11: Well, and that's the whole theme.
• 30:06
  Speaker 7: It doesn't matter that Frosty's body is different.
• 30:08
  Speaker 10: His soul is still the same.
• 30:10
  Speaker 7: I don't know.
• 30:11
  Speaker 11: His frosty, frosty soul.
• 30:13
  Speaker 15: Okay.
• 30:14
  Speaker 11: But we've changed. You know, that's the thing, is we've changed.
• 30:18
  Speaker 11: We're all different people now since last year, and it's
• 30:21
  Speaker 11: cold out here, and maybe we should just move on,
• 30:24
  Speaker 11: you know? Frosty the Snowman is like the song that
• 30:29
  Speaker 11: resonates the most. And that's what happens in Hamlet. Hamlet
• 30:32
  Speaker 11: is all about people being replaced from the very beginning
• 30:36
  Speaker 11: until they're digging up the old bones to bury the
• 30:40
  Speaker 11: new dead. And it's about actors whose job is to
• 30:44
  Speaker 11: replace other people. And his whole crisis is that his
• 30:48
  Speaker 11: uncle has replaced his father and they're brothers, so they
• 30:52
  Speaker 11: look alike. And even the first thing that happens... It's
• 30:55
  Speaker 11: like the changing of the guard. So in the dark,
• 30:58
  Speaker 11: these two military guys, one comes and takes the place
• 31:02
  Speaker 11: of the other, and it's just this disturbing fantasy.
• 31:05
  Speaker 10: It's just like The Lion King when you think about it.
• 31:08
  Speaker 7: Circle of Life. I'm sure they ripped up that story.
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: Alright, so there's Fred's very elaborate reasoning for his choice. Again,
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: there's sort of a weird area there, whether it's a
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: classic TV special versus a film. We usually try to
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: stick more to the film soundtracks. We'll make some exceptions
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: this episode. We also reserve the right to play whatever
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: the hell we want. But this one I thought instead
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: of going with the very traditional TV version that we've
• 31:41
  Speaker 2: always seen, I actually went back because I'd heard about
• 31:46
  Speaker 2: the fact that that wasn't the original one. And I
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: know the song had come out much earlier. And then
• 31:52
  Speaker 2: the one that we see every year on Christmas came
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: later as an animated special. But there is actually a
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: 1954 short film that was the first version of Frosty
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: the Snowman, at least as it was done in an
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: animated style. It's almost just like one of the first
• 32:09
  Speaker 2: music videos because it's basically just them taking the song
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: and creating a film to go with it. And it's
• 32:17
  Speaker 2: similar in ways to the animated special that we've all
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: seen a million times but it's a very different visual
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: style it's also more of a a jazzy version of
• 32:27
  Speaker 2: the song sort of acapella and um i don't know
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: it is one that that caught on in its own
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: way it was done sort of independently and then got
• 32:35
  Speaker 2: picked up and was shown i know wgn played it
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: for years as sort of an annual thing that they
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: did So you may have seen it, but if not, go,
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: it's on YouTube, go check it out. It's interesting to
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: see how it was originally conceived in 1954 in this
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: short film version. So this is the song that accompanies that.
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: This is Frosty the Snowman.
• 32:57
  Speaker 15: Frosty!
• 33:04
  Speaker 9: Frosty the Snowman was a jolly happy.
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: Soul With a corncob pipe and a button nose And
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: two eyes.
• 33:12
  Speaker 9: Made out of coal Frosty the Snowman is a fairy
• 33:18
  Speaker 9: tale they say He was made of snow but the
• 33:21
  Speaker 9: children know How he came to life one day.
• 33:25
  Speaker 38: There must have been some magic in that old.
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: Silk hat they found.
• 33:31
  Speaker 7: For when they placed it on.
• 33:32
  Speaker 39: His head, he began to dance around.
• 33:35
  Speaker 9: Oh, Frosty, the snowman was alive as he could be.
• 33:41
  Speaker 39: And the children say he could laugh and play just
• 33:44
  Speaker 39: the same.
• 33:44
  Speaker 23: As you and me.
• 33:47
  Speaker 7: Hey, look at Frosty go.
• 33:49
  Speaker 15: Whee!
• 33:49
  Speaker 7: He's alive as he can be.
• 34:03
  Speaker 24: Fra-di-dum-dum, fra-di-dum-dum, happy.
• 34:06
  Speaker 15: And gay is he. Dum-di-di-do, ding-bum.
• 34:11
  Speaker 34: Dum-di-di-do, ding-bum.
• 34:13
  Speaker 30: Frosty the snowman knew the sun was hot that day.
• 34:18
  Speaker 40: So he said, let's run and have some fun before
• 34:22
  Speaker 40: I melt away.
• 34:23
  Speaker 38: So down to the village with a broomstick in his hand.
• 34:29
  Speaker 17: Running here and there all around the square saying.
• 34:32
  Speaker 5: Catch me if you can, ha-ha!
• 34:34
  Speaker 9: He led them down the streets of town right.
• 34:37
  Speaker 3: To the traffic cop.
• 34:40
  Speaker 15: And he only paused a moment when he heard him holler, stop!
• 34:45
  Speaker 9: Friday, Friday, Friday, Friday, Friday, Friday, Friday, Friday.
• 35:06
  Speaker 17: Frosty the Snowman had.
• 35:09
  Speaker 15: To hurry, hurry on his way.
• 35:11
  Speaker 9: But he waved goodbye saying, don't you cry, I'll be
• 35:14
  Speaker 9: back again someday.
• 35:17
  Speaker 6: Thumpity, thumpity, thump, thump.
• 35:19
  Speaker 15: I'll be back again someday.
• 35:21
  Speaker 9: Jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle.
• 35:25
  Speaker 15: Jingle, jingle, jingle, jingle.
• 35:28
  Speaker 9: Look at Frosty go.
• 35:32
  Speaker 11: And also, there's just a memorable thing from when I
• 35:35
  Speaker 11: was in third grade There was a kid who was
• 35:39
  Speaker 11: like a child preacher. Nobody liked him because he would
• 35:42
  Speaker 11: preach at you and stuff.
• 35:44
  Speaker 7: To hate that while you're in grade school.
• 35:46
  Speaker 11: Maybe his parents were sort of churchy and thought it
• 35:48
  Speaker 11: was cute to get him to do that. And so
• 35:50
  Speaker 11: we went around trying to be cute until everybody just
• 35:53
  Speaker 11: didn't like him. But one day my best friend was like, hey.
• 36:00
  Speaker 11: John is in the bathroom singing Frosty the Snowman. Just
• 36:05
  Speaker 11: all these kids. Heard the kid in the bathroom singing
• 36:11
  Speaker 11: Frosty the Snowman, and he just kept going. I was like,
• 36:14
  Speaker 11: is this ever going to end? Do we have classwork?
• 36:18
  Speaker 11: Do we have to go back? It's just a moment
• 36:22
  Speaker 11: I remember from childhood that seemed to go on forever. Well,
• 36:26
  Speaker 11: that's my song. And now it's time for a holiday rant.
• 36:31
  Speaker 7: All right, do you want to hear what pisses me
• 36:32
  Speaker 7: off about Frosty?
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: Not specifically the song, but the show, the animated special
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: that we all watched year after year.
• 36:39
  Speaker 7: And nobody else ever brought this up. And I'm like,
• 36:42
  Speaker 7: it's so ridiculous.
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: It can't just be me, but you've got this whole
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: little group of kids, and they're all hanging out there,
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: and woo-hoo, we're out of school, let's build a snowman.
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: And they're all outside, and they've got their coats, and
• 36:53
  Speaker 2: their scarves, and their hats, and mittens, and boots, and shorts.
• 36:58
  Speaker 15: Mm-hmm.
• 36:59
  Speaker 7: I'm not making it up. Why has no one else
• 37:01
  Speaker 7: ever noticed they're all fucking wearing shorts?
• 37:05
  Speaker 15: What the hell?
• 37:06
  Speaker 7: The rabbit's not wearing clothes. That rabbit's not even wearing pants.
• 37:09
  Speaker 7: But like, every one of them is wearing shorts.
• 37:12
  Speaker 13: Are these guys, are their mouths stitched up?
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because they were talking shit and that rabbit wasn't
• 37:16
  Speaker 2: putting up with it.
• 37:17
  Speaker 7: And it's a different version of a rabbit. You know,
• 37:19
  Speaker 7: they all kind of look like hobbits.
• 37:21
  Speaker 10: Now that I look at it.
• 37:22
  Speaker 13: It's Wrinkling Bass.
• 37:23
  Speaker 7: Wrinkling Bass. I don't know.
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: Is that a red flag for everyone?
• 37:29
  Speaker 7: What the hell is wrong with this show? It's just me.
• 37:32
  Speaker 13: Well, this chick doesn't even have a jacket on.
• 37:34
  Speaker 7: Well, she's an idiot.
• 37:35
  Speaker 11: But at least the rest of them have scarves, hats, earmuffs.
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: The one kid's got a scarf bigger than he is,
• 37:41
  Speaker 2: but he's still wearing shorts.
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 37:44
  Speaker 7: That's always pissed me off a lot.
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: The other thing I think is really funny is at
• 37:49
  Speaker 2: the end, and we have this big happy ending, and
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: Frosty lives, and he goes with Santa.
• 37:53
  Speaker 7: Spoiler alert.
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: He goes off with Santa, and he takes her home,
• 37:57
  Speaker 2: and yay. He leaves the little girl.
• 38:01
  Speaker 13: Did his ass melt in the greenhouse?
• 38:02
  Speaker 7: He melts, but he comes back, and it's a big
• 38:05
  Speaker 7: Hollywood ending bullshit. But, okay, he takes her home. He
• 38:09
  Speaker 7: leaves her on the roof.
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: This is a little girl stuck by herself on a
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: snow-covered icy roof.
• 38:17
  Speaker 7: So two seconds later, she was on the ground with
• 38:19
  Speaker 7: her neck broken, right? That's what you're telling me?
• 38:21
  Speaker 10: Are you wanting Fred to change his song?
• 38:23
  Speaker 7: Is that what you're getting at?
• 38:24
  Speaker 2: No, I was doing nothing but complaining about it. He
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: had fond memories, maybe, sort of, or traumatized. But I just.
• 38:31
  Speaker 10: The thing that I think is really interesting about the
• 38:34
  Speaker 10: concept of snowmen in general is... You know, kids in
• 38:38
  Speaker 10: the olden days, you know, they'd make their little snowman
• 38:41
  Speaker 10: and then they would decorate it with common things found
• 38:43
  Speaker 10: around the house, like coal and carrots and old felt.
• 38:47
  Speaker 7: Hats, which is stuff that nobody has anymore.
• 38:50
  Speaker 10: So to make that classic snowman, you have to go
• 38:54
  Speaker 10: and spend a lot of money getting pieces of coal
• 38:57
  Speaker 10: and a big, abraham lincoln hat you know and that
• 39:00
  Speaker 10: nobody has around anymore so i should sell snowman kits
• 39:04
  Speaker 10: i guess is what i'm getting at you know.
• 39:06
  Speaker 2: No what you're saying is it needs to be updated
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: so now like his nose is a remote control oh
• 39:11
  Speaker 2: that's a pottery barn catalog it's just shit laying around
• 39:13
  Speaker 2: your needs one of those hipster hats yeah that'd be
• 39:15
  Speaker 2: great a couple of broken ipods for eyes because they
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: only last about six months and you do something stupid
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: and they fall.
• 39:23
  Speaker 7: Apart So I think, yeah, I think we need to
• 39:26
  Speaker 7: update this whole how to build a snowman.
• 39:27
  Speaker 3: Batteries for eyes.
• 39:29
  Speaker 17: Yeah.
• 39:30
  Speaker 11: Snow persons now.
• 39:31
  Speaker 7: Depends on which one you build. It depends on where
• 39:34
  Speaker 7: you put the iPod.
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: Depends on if you put it in the backyard and
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: how personal you get with it.
• 39:38
  Speaker 13: Alright.
• 39:41
  Speaker 39: Moving on.
• 39:42
  Speaker 7: Marlena, what do you have for us?
• 39:46
  Speaker 34: I don't know the name of the song. And I
• 39:48
  Speaker 34: don't even really know what they say, but in the grudge,
• 39:50
  Speaker 34: when they all start.
• 39:52
  Speaker 7: Going, Fa-hoo-da-ray, fa-hoo-da-ray.
• 39:56
  Speaker 24: Yeah, whatever. I really like that song.
• 39:58
  Speaker 15: I don't know why. Fa-hoo-da-ray, fa-hoo-da-ray. Welcome Christmas, come this way.
• 40:14
  Speaker 9: Fahoo foreys, dahoo doreys, welcome Christmas, Christmas day. Welcome, welcome,
• 40:28
  Speaker 9: Fahoo ramus.
• 40:30
  Speaker 8: Welcome, welcome, dahoo damus.
• 40:34
  Speaker 15: Christmas day is in our grasp.
• 40:38
  Speaker 9: So long as we have hands to clasp. Fahoo forays,
• 40:46
  Speaker 9: dahoo doh rays, welcome Christmas, bring your cheer. Fahoo forays,
• 40:54
  Speaker 9: dahoo doh rays, welcome all who's far and near.
• 41:01
  Speaker 15: Welcome Christmas, Fahuramus. Welcome Christmas, Fahudamus.
• 41:09
  Speaker 9: Christmas Day will always be just so long as.
• 41:17
  Speaker 15: We have we. Fahufores, Dahudores.
• 41:23
  Speaker 9: Welcome Christmas, bring your light.
• 41:28
  Speaker 28: Ooh.
• 42:22
  Speaker 19: Welcome Christmas, Bahuramus. Welcome Christmas, Dabu Dabus.
• 42:44
  Speaker 34: I have a fondness for Christmas songs that I have
• 43:10
  Speaker 34: no idea what the fucking words are.
• 43:12
  Speaker 24: You know, like It's easier that way.
• 43:14
  Speaker 13: Like most of them.
• 43:15
  Speaker 7: You should listen to Latin stuff.
• 43:17
  Speaker 24: Like Come All Ye Faithful.
• 43:18
  Speaker 7: Latin Mass.
• 43:19
  Speaker 24: I have no idea what they sing that song in.
• 43:21
  Speaker 15: Come All Ye Faithful.
• 43:23
  Speaker 17: Yeah.
• 43:23
  Speaker 7: You're singing it like the Yahoo Nori song.
• 43:27
  Speaker 11: Or the one in Peanuts where their mouths turn into
• 43:30
  Speaker 11: little O's.
• 43:31
  Speaker 10: Yeah.
• 43:32
  Speaker 15: And they just go. Yeah.
• 43:35
  Speaker 34: I feel like I've mentioned my knees like a lot.
• 43:37
  Speaker 34: 20 dubs tonight. But I'm around her all the time.
• 43:39
  Speaker 34: But like when she sings, that's what she does with
• 43:42
  Speaker 34: her mouth. And it's like so hilarious.
• 43:43
  Speaker 11: It's so funny.
• 43:45
  Speaker 7: She's Athena's character.
• 43:47
  Speaker 24: She is. She really is.
• 43:49
  Speaker 34: But what's the other one? There's Come All Ye Faithful.
• 43:52
  Speaker 34: And then what's the other Christmas song that's like along
• 43:56
  Speaker 34: those lines?
• 43:57
  Speaker 13: Feliz Navidad.
• 44:00
  Speaker 7: I really don't know what they're saying. It's like they're
• 44:02
  Speaker 7: not even speaking our language. It was just in my head.
• 44:05
  Speaker 7: Carol and the Bells is pretty frightening.
• 44:06
  Speaker 24: Oh, the tidings of comfort and joy.
• 44:09
  Speaker 11: Comfort and joy.
• 44:10
  Speaker 24: I don't know what they say in that fucking song either.
• 44:12
  Speaker 7: You just watched it or you're not going to get
• 44:14
  Speaker 7: any figgy.
• 44:15
  Speaker 34: My favorite thing to do with almost any song ever
• 44:17
  Speaker 34: is to just make up words. There's a Justin Timberlake
• 44:20
  Speaker 34: song that's on the radio and I swear he says
• 44:22
  Speaker 34: a pocket.
• 44:22
  Speaker 24: Full of soap.
• 44:24
  Speaker 7: He does for you i was like.
• 44:27
  Speaker 34: I was going somewhere with like my friend mark and
• 44:29
  Speaker 34: i was like something something in a pocket full of
• 44:31
  Speaker 34: soap he's like i don't think he says that and
• 44:33
  Speaker 34: i was like yeah he does he's like you know
• 44:35
  Speaker 34: there's a way you can find that out and i
• 44:37
  Speaker 34: was like i don't care he says pocket full of
• 44:39
  Speaker 34: soap is.
• 44:41
  Speaker 38: That the take back the night song because that's amazing
• 44:44
  Speaker 38: to me just that whole.
• 44:45
  Speaker 34: Concept i think it's the mirror song maybe i don't
• 44:48
  Speaker 34: know i don't But I swear it sounds like he
• 44:51
  Speaker 34: says in a pocket full of soap, and that's just
• 44:53
  Speaker 34: where I'm leaving it at.
• 44:54
  Speaker 11: I just remembered that in college I appeared in a movie.
• 45:00
  Speaker 11: That a guy was making jokes in one scene where
• 45:04
  Speaker 11: we went door to door as Christmas carolers, and we
• 45:09
  Speaker 11: sang Hark the Herald Angels Sing, but he didn't know
• 45:12
  Speaker 11: the real words to the second line, so he made
• 45:15
  Speaker 11: them up, and they were E-Bart-O-A-Cho-Ba-Ha-Na. Fred Incentor's Reconciled.
• 45:24
  Speaker 7: There's a reason they were repressed memories.
• 45:28
  Speaker 11: It was this kid making a movie for a class
• 45:30
  Speaker 11: in school. He's like, yeah, well, you go be in
• 45:33
  Speaker 11: these Christmas carols.
• 45:33
  Speaker 34: This was before Google, so it would have been hard
• 45:37
  Speaker 34: to find everything that you.
• 45:38
  Speaker 24: Need to know.
• 45:39
  Speaker 11: Oh, yeah, you couldn't find it out.
• 45:41
  Speaker 24: You'd have to go to the library and look at
• 45:42
  Speaker 24: an encyclopedia.
• 45:43
  Speaker 7: Who's going to do that? Yeah.
• 45:46
  Speaker 24: You know what's kind of sad?
• 45:48
  Speaker 34: I bet plagiarism was way more common back in the
• 45:50
  Speaker 34: day because you could just make shit up and say
• 45:52
  Speaker 34: that it came from a book.
• 45:53
  Speaker 24: Who's going to fucking check that?
• 45:55
  Speaker 7: It's much easier now because it's called copy and paste.
• 45:58
  Speaker 24: Yeah, but you can check that.
• 45:59
  Speaker 11: Oh, actually, I made up. I probably told the story now.
• 46:06
  Speaker 11: i want a book fair contest when i was a
• 46:11
  Speaker 11: kid but i didn't understand it was supposed to be
• 46:13
  Speaker 11: based on a particular book so when they asked me
• 46:15
  Speaker 11: and what was your book i had to make something
• 46:17
  Speaker 11: up i just had to make up a book and
• 46:21
  Speaker 11: i i was about to say uh jack london but
• 46:24
  Speaker 11: it's like no i don't think you write shit like
• 46:27
  Speaker 11: that i don't know so i just made up some
• 46:30
  Speaker 11: sort of name and uh And I won.
• 46:35
  Speaker 7: And so then the next.
• 46:37
  Speaker 11: Time they had a book fair thing, I thought, I
• 46:39
  Speaker 11: know how to do this. I won last year. I
• 46:41
  Speaker 11: was the winner. So I made this, like, Addams Family-like
• 46:45
  Speaker 11: recreation of Blackbeard's last battle, and it was the bloodiest
• 46:51
  Speaker 11: thing you'd ever seen. It was very meticulously put together. And,
• 46:54
  Speaker 11: of course, I didn't win because some girl with a
• 46:57
  Speaker 11: bunch of Barbies in a cardboard box....
• 47:00
  Speaker 13: Karen Carpenter story.
• 47:01
  Speaker 6: Yes.
• 47:02
  Speaker 11: Actually, it was Little Women. She won with... Oh, because
• 47:07
  Speaker 11: Barbie's a little woman.
• 47:10
  Speaker 7: I get it.
• 47:12
  Speaker 11: And actually, that project, as I've mentioned, is what I'm
• 47:15
  Speaker 11: going to die of.
• 47:16
  Speaker 24: Oh, the asbestos project.
• 47:17
  Speaker 11: The asbestos project. Because I read in a book in
• 47:20
  Speaker 11: the library that's how they made dioramas at the Field Museum.
• 47:24
  Speaker 7: Well, yeah, we'll go ahead and plug that now. Just
• 47:26
  Speaker 7: go back to the original recipe.
• 47:29
  Speaker 2: Movie Meltdown, and yeah, Fred dies at the end.
• 47:31
  Speaker 7: Just listen. You'll understand.
• 47:34
  Speaker 24: That's kicking it old school.
• 47:35
  Speaker 7: That's probably two years. You'll appreciate it.
• 47:40
  Speaker 17: God.
• 47:40
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 47:41
  Speaker 7: It's an amazing tale, let me tell you.
• 47:43
  Speaker 37: It really was.
• 47:44
  Speaker 7: That's just a snippet.
• 47:45
  Speaker 18: Just a snippet.
• 47:45
  Speaker 30: Just a taste.
• 47:46
  Speaker 21: Just a taste.
• 47:49
  Speaker 17: I'm done.
• 47:50
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 47:51
  Speaker 24: Actually, I do want to mention before we move into Lucy.
• 47:53
  Speaker 7: It's not your.
• 47:54
  Speaker 11: Niece again, is it?
• 47:55
  Speaker 12: No.
• 47:55
  Speaker 11: You're not going to do that again. You've done that
• 47:57
  Speaker 11: 20 times.
• 47:58
  Speaker 24: I know.
• 47:59
  Speaker 7: Don't tell stories over and over again.
• 48:01
  Speaker 24: She's like the only person I hang out with. I
• 48:02
  Speaker 24: can't help it.
• 48:03
  Speaker 11: Yeah, I'm going to have to be the cop and
• 48:06
  Speaker 11: stop people from retelling stuff we've already heard.
• 48:09
  Speaker 7: You really should.
• 48:10
  Speaker 11: I have to, like, jump in here and set some limits.
• 48:15
  Speaker 7: Don't steal my thing, man.
• 48:16
  Speaker 17: But, um.
• 48:18
  Speaker 34: What's that Christmas album that's so awesome that you have?
• 48:22
  Speaker 7: Take your pick.
• 48:23
  Speaker 24: No, it's the most awesome one ever.
• 48:25
  Speaker 34: It's got, like, the Porn Orchard song, the Peter Murphy
• 48:29
  Speaker 34: and Tom Waits.
• 48:30
  Speaker 7: That one's kind of amazing.
• 48:33
  Speaker 24: That's the best Christmas song ever written in history.
• 48:35
  Speaker 7: It's not even a great album overall.
• 48:37
  Speaker 2: There's a lot of misses on that one, but there's
• 48:40
  Speaker 2: a couple that are really great, and that one is amazing.
• 48:43
  Speaker 34: There's a band called Porn Orchard who imitated... Peter Murphy
• 48:48
  Speaker 34: and Tom Waits and sang this song about them.
• 48:50
  Speaker 38: I thought you were saying it was an actual Peter Murphy,
• 48:52
  Speaker 38: Tom Waits.
• 48:53
  Speaker 7: It's fictionalized.
• 48:55
  Speaker 37: It's blowing my mind.
• 48:56
  Speaker 7: They both do a pretty good version of it.
• 48:59
  Speaker 24: It's a good imitation.
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: It really is.
• 49:01
  Speaker 24: But it's like this holiday season is what it's called.
• 49:03
  Speaker 24: And they're like.
• 49:05
  Speaker 34: The lyric is this holiday season is all the more
• 49:08
  Speaker 34: reason to die.
• 49:09
  Speaker 7: It's awesome.
• 49:11
  Speaker 34: It's like the most amazing song ever. Everyone go find
• 49:15
  Speaker 34: that right now because it rules.
• 49:18
  Speaker 9: All right.
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: Well, this is where we're going to stray a little
• 49:20
  Speaker 2: bit because we can't. It's our option. It's the holidays.
• 49:24
  Speaker 2: We reserve the right to do whatever the hell we want.
• 49:26
  Speaker 2: So this is not specifically from a soundtrack, but I
• 49:31
  Speaker 2: thought because Marlena was so taken with it, we would
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: share it with you guys in its entirety. We did
• 49:36
  Speaker 2: actually work it into a Christmas episode on the original
• 49:40
  Speaker 2: recipe show several, several years ago. So it's one that
• 49:44
  Speaker 2: a lot of people may not even have heard on
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: the show. And Marlena, it's been so long, Marlena wasn't
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: even on the show then. So that's how far back
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: we're going. So I figured it'd been many years. We
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: can work it back in. And yeah, this is Porn
• 49:58
  Speaker 2: Orchard with this holiday season. Enjoy, I guess.
• 50:07
  Speaker 8: Well, the carpet has been drinking. Yes, the can opener
• 50:13
  Speaker 8: has been drinking. Oh, I see the typewriter has been drinking.
• 50:20
  Speaker 7: Oh, the doorbell.
• 50:22
  Speaker 8: Has been drinking. Well, I'll be Peter Murphy.
• 50:29
  Speaker 11: Come on in.
• 50:30
  Speaker 7: Hello, Tom. How's it going?
• 50:32
  Speaker 8: Uh, you know, the usual. I'll tell you, this lawsuit
• 50:38
  Speaker 8: thing against that drag queen in Georgia is really taking forever.
• 50:42
  Speaker 8: What brings you over here, Pete?
• 50:44
  Speaker 32: Well, Tom, through the night I've been tortured by fever
• 50:47
  Speaker 32: dreams of a lovely and ethereal woman child perpetually beyond
• 50:51
  Speaker 32: my taunted reach, driving me to the very brink of madness.
• 50:56
  Speaker 8: Hmm, jeez. Well, I hope she's stacked. Say, Pete, I'd
• 51:01
  Speaker 8: offer you a drink, but I'd down the whole thing
• 51:03
  Speaker 8: myself already.
• 51:04
  Speaker 32: Then, Tom, for lack of spirits, let us toast this
• 51:08
  Speaker 32: cold and empty Noel with a song.
• 51:10
  Speaker 15: That's not a bad idea.
• 51:21
  Speaker 21: Oh, give me a noose I can hang from the tree.
• 51:26
  Speaker 21: I need no excuse to end my misery. This holiday
• 51:32
  Speaker 21: season is all the more reason to die.
• 51:37
  Speaker 15: Oh, pull up a stool and an ear to a fool.
• 51:47
  Speaker 8: Once found some solace in the season of Yule. This
• 51:52
  Speaker 8: holiday season is all for more reason to cry.
• 52:01
  Speaker 21: I put on my mittens One green and one red
• 52:07
  Speaker 21: And I walk alone Where they bury the dead The
• 52:13
  Speaker 21: snow falls as I grieve.
• 52:15
  Speaker 7: It's a gothic death rock Christmas.
• 52:19
  Speaker 18: Eve The bottle is empty The sleigh has.
• 52:27
  Speaker 15: A flat The stripper in.
• 52:30
  Speaker 18: My bed is ugly and fat Her tassels are tangled
• 52:36
  Speaker 18: and what's worse my jingle won't jangle This time of.
• 52:45
  Speaker 8: The year makes me sick to my guts All this
• 52:50
  Speaker 8: good cheer is.
• 52:52
  Speaker 15: A pain in the nuts.
• 52:54
  Speaker 21: When it's your career to be down in the dumps,
• 53:00
  Speaker 21: tidings of comfort and joy really suck.
• 53:10
  Speaker 19: I feel like St.
• 53:17
  Speaker 15: Nicholas is pulling my leg.
• 53:20
  Speaker 32: This thing we call Christmas is a sorry black plague.
• 53:26
  Speaker 8: This holiday season.
• 53:28
  Speaker 15: Is all the more reason all the more reason to
• 53:32
  Speaker 15: die all the more reason to.
• 53:36
  Speaker 9: Die all the more.
• 53:55
  Speaker 41: That guy's name is Benjamin.
• 54:07
  Speaker 7: That is his professional name, the one that does Tom Waits.
• 54:11
  Speaker 7: And he's kind of got an amazing voice, I have
• 54:13
  Speaker 7: to say. It's different than Tom, but it equally is.
• 54:17
  Speaker 7: What the hell, and how did you get into singing?
• 54:19
  Speaker 24: I mean, he does a really good Tom Waits impression.
• 54:21
  Speaker 2: But he's doing a Tom Waits version of that, and
• 54:23
  Speaker 2: it's quite entertaining.
• 54:25
  Speaker 34: My boss tried to argue with me that Tom Waits
• 54:26
  Speaker 34: wasn't that popular the other day, but he just doesn't
• 54:28
  Speaker 34: know what he's talking about.
• 54:29
  Speaker 2: It's okay.
• 54:31
  Speaker 7: I think it depends on the circle that you're hanging out.
• 54:33
  Speaker 17: Yeah.
• 54:33
  Speaker 11: I do know they've done a questionnaire to the general
• 54:38
  Speaker 11: public who would be the least likely musician to sell out,
• 54:44
  Speaker 11: and Tom Waits is at the top of that list.
• 54:47
  Speaker 7: I mean, Dylan sold it.
• 54:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 54:50
  Speaker 7: And he wasn't going to do any of that stuff until.
• 54:52
  Speaker 34: How do you define selling out? Does Tom Waits have
• 54:54
  Speaker 34: the option of selling out?
• 54:56
  Speaker 17: I mean.
• 54:56
  Speaker 11: Most people are like.
• 54:58
  Speaker 7: Um, no, I don't think he's right for us.
• 55:01
  Speaker 24: I mean, he's in like Hollywood movies.
• 55:02
  Speaker 7: Well, that might.
• 55:04
  Speaker 11: affect the likelihood could be I don't know what the factors.
• 55:08
  Speaker 2: Of probability are he's probably up for it he's just
• 55:11
  Speaker 2: like Pringles he doesn't care he'll do whatever but like
• 55:15
  Speaker 2: they won't give him the check and he's just sitting
• 55:18
  Speaker 2: in his.
• 55:18
  Speaker 7: Driveway doing it let's do that again these.
• 55:21
  Speaker 9: Dudes won't give me a fucking check I don't know
• 55:23
  Speaker 9: keep singing about coke and nobody gives me coke and
• 55:26
  Speaker 9: a fucking smile I don't get nothing I mean like sing.
• 55:30
  Speaker 11: Pringles again Pringles.
• 55:34
  Speaker 7: Crazy duck wheel chips.
• 55:37
  Speaker 15: Ringo. Kenny.
• 55:40
  Speaker 7: Just wait, that's a different show.
• 55:42
  Speaker 15: Never mind. Make it up.
• 55:45
  Speaker 7: Tom Waits.
• 55:47
  Speaker 15: Just make it up.
• 55:49
  Speaker 24: But, I mean, like, defy telling out, though.
• 55:52
  Speaker 34: Like, I like Tom Waits, but, like, he's already part
• 55:55
  Speaker 34: of a major record label, and he's in, like, Hollywood
• 55:58
  Speaker 34: movies all the time.
• 55:59
  Speaker 24: So, like, What is, I mean, he's not doing commercials? Like,
• 56:03
  Speaker 24: that's the definitive?
• 56:04
  Speaker 11: Well, there's a distinction that potheads used to make between
• 56:09
  Speaker 11: commercial music and commercial music.
• 56:12
  Speaker 24: That's what I'm saying.
• 56:14
  Speaker 37: Like, is that what it is?
• 56:14
  Speaker 34: They're like, oh, you're so commercial, and I mean, like,
• 56:17
  Speaker 34: you're legitimately in commercials.
• 56:19
  Speaker 24: That's what selling out is like.
• 56:20
  Speaker 7: That's all it takes, really.
• 56:21
  Speaker 24: Like, that is, like, the lie.
• 56:23
  Speaker 11: They used to actually do that with the pot itself.
• 56:26
  Speaker 11: They would have, like, Colombian pot, and they'd, is it Colombian?
• 56:30
  Speaker 3: Is it?
• 56:30
  Speaker 11: Commercial Colombian. And I think what that meant was, it's
• 56:34
  Speaker 11: not Colombian, but we're going to sell it as Colombian
• 56:38
  Speaker 11: because it's more expensive that way. And Pothead's just accepted
• 56:42
  Speaker 11: this term and went, oh, okay. It's commercial Colombian.
• 56:46
  Speaker 7: Are these real Cuban cigars? Eh, I'm sure they are.
• 56:49
  Speaker 11: I guess it's kind of like, is it fresh? It's
• 56:53
  Speaker 11: fresh frozen.
• 56:56
  Speaker 24: I don't know what it meant.
• 56:57
  Speaker 11: Nobody ever thought about it.
• 56:59
  Speaker 2: I think it helps Tom's, you know, street cred that
• 57:03
  Speaker 2: most of the movies he does make don't really do
• 57:05
  Speaker 2: that well. He ends up in the weirdest movies sometimes. Like,
• 57:08
  Speaker 2: even stuff that seems like, that's probably going to be
• 57:10
  Speaker 2: a hit.
• 57:11
  Speaker 7: No, no, somehow. Just his involvement, like, is just somehow.
• 57:15
  Speaker 11: I'm going to remake Short Cuts with just him and
• 57:20
  Speaker 11: Lily Tomlin.
• 57:20
  Speaker 7: I could get on board with that.
• 57:21
  Speaker 11: Everybody else should be fired from that project. Because they're
• 57:26
  Speaker 11: the only ones who felt like characters like Raymond carver
• 57:29
  Speaker 11: stories and they were they were just perfect for it
• 57:33
  Speaker 11: and i remember the night we saw that movie uh
• 57:36
  Speaker 11: it almost made us like get in a fight we
• 57:40
  Speaker 11: were just so mad at the fucking movie we're just
• 57:45
  Speaker 11: we left and we were just in bad moods.
• 57:53
  Speaker 7: And lucy yeah.
• 57:56
  Speaker 38: Okay, I struggled with this assignment because, frankly, I feel
• 57:59
  Speaker 38: like you're opening old wounds.
• 58:02
  Speaker 7: That's the best part about these shows.
• 58:03
  Speaker 23: Yeah.
• 58:04
  Speaker 38: So a year ago, you took my favorite holiday song.
• 58:08
  Speaker 7: That's not my fault. I just had that story ready.
• 58:11
  Speaker 7: You just happened to like it. That sounds like your
• 58:13
  Speaker 7: fault to me.
• 58:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 58:14
  Speaker 38: So, Baby, It's Cold Outside is no longer my favorite
• 58:17
  Speaker 38: Christmas song.
• 58:18
  Speaker 1: I ruined it.
• 58:18
  Speaker 7: Sorry about that.
• 58:19
  Speaker 37: When it was pointed out to me that it was rapey.
• 58:22
  Speaker 7: It's very rapey.
• 58:23
  Speaker 35: I'm sorry.
• 58:23
  Speaker 30: I'm sorry.
• 58:24
  Speaker 37: Very rapey.
• 58:24
  Speaker 11: It wasn't really a Christmas song either.
• 58:27
  Speaker 28: Yeah.
• 58:27
  Speaker 24: It's later on Christmas time.
• 58:28
  Speaker 7: It was a holiday song.
• 58:30
  Speaker 11: Well, it originated in a movie called, I think, Holiday Inn.
• 58:35
  Speaker 23: Yes.
• 58:35
  Speaker 11: About a guy with a really bad business plan to
• 58:38
  Speaker 11: have a hotel that was only open on holidays. And
• 58:44
  Speaker 11: it was originally sung by Ethel Merman and Ricardo Montalban.
• 58:50
  Speaker 2: Really?
• 58:51
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 58:52
  Speaker 11: It had nothing to do with Christmas, but it mentions snow,
• 58:56
  Speaker 11: and so it became associated with that.
• 58:58
  Speaker 24: Sometimes that's all it takes.
• 59:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 59:01
  Speaker 37: So, now I don't really have anything.
• 59:05
  Speaker 7: We've listened to comics.
• 59:10
  Speaker 38: Told there needed to be a movie tie-in. I would
• 59:12
  Speaker 38: have been perfectly happy to either mention that or Elf. Now,
• 59:16
  Speaker 38: I think all of my favorite Christmas songs don't. Your
• 59:19
  Speaker 38: theory was that they're all in a movie at some point.
• 59:22
  Speaker 7: So if somebody can.
• 59:23
  Speaker 37: Find me the movie with.
• 59:25
  Speaker 38: Any of the Esquivel Christmas songs, because that's, like, my
• 59:28
  Speaker 38: favorite Christmas, the Sage Bachelor Pad Christmas.
• 59:30
  Speaker 37: Album, that's amazing.
• 59:33
  Speaker 38: And then the Pearl Bailey song, Five Pound Box of Money,
• 59:35
  Speaker 38: which there's pretty much nothing better than that in the world.
• 59:37
  Speaker 37: Also no movie tie-in. That's all I've got.
• 59:39
  Speaker 7: I don't know what to tell you on that.
• 59:41
  Speaker 31: Yeah.
• 59:42
  Speaker 7: Do you like any Christmas movie? I think that's the
• 59:46
  Speaker 7: way to start with this. I mean, that's kind of the, like, what.
• 59:51
  Speaker 2: about a movie usually the holiday movies and then there's
• 59:55
  Speaker 2: like a song that you get attached to because it's
• 59:57
  Speaker 2: in that movie that's always how the uh that angle
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 2: worked for me it's just like oh that's what i
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 2: tie this christmas song to immediately is because it was
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 2: in this movie again because i'm a movie geek but
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 2: i'm just like there's so many songs that are traditional
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 2: song that i can't hear any other way i can
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 2: hear it and i immediately think of the movie that
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 2: it's featured in, that has nothing to do with that
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 2: song and probably is very non-Christmas oriented in many ways,
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 2: but that's how I always link to so many Christmas songs.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 9: Gotcha.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 38: Well, I thought I was a movie geek, but it's
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 38: possible that I'm more of a Christmas geek. It's possible
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 38: that my Christmas geekdom has superseded.
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 37: My movie geekdom.
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 7: That's a terrible situation.
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 24: Yeah.
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 38: So anyway, I have the XM radio, so there's like
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 38: five Christmas stations, so I just listen to those pretty
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 38: much on repeat.
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 37: During this entire holiday season.
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 7: You are one of those Christmas people, aren't you?
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 30: Yeah, I kind of am.
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 37: Or I was until last year, when it all got ruined.
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 7: Yeah, well, we'll win you over to Life Day. You
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 7: just wait.
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 38: Yes, last year also being when you ruined Star Wars
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 38: for me.
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 30: Yes!
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 11: I'm pretty sure Luke has ruined Star Wars.
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 2: I take no responsibility for the Star Wars holiday special.
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 7: Thank you.
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 1: Aha!
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 3: She was wrong.
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 2: And once again, my theory holds true. They all sort
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 2: of turn up in movies at some point. And even funnier,
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: I mean, is it not enough that I dashed all
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 2: of her Christmas hopes and dreams last year? But no,
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 2: I think it's funny that this year she picks her
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 2: song and it is from a movie soundtrack. It just
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 2: came out. Lucy has chosen a song from the Madea
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 2: family Christmas soundtrack. Nice choice, Lucy. Madea, I hope you're happy. Luckily,
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 2: this song is awesome. So this is, as she mentioned,
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 2: in her dream list of songs she wanted to work in,
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 2: Five Pound Box of Money by Miss Pearl Bailey.
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 40: Hey, Santa Claus, you want to make me happy this year?
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 29: Listen to me, honey.
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 40: Give Pearl something that'll be of some use to me,
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 40: like a... A five-pound box of money. Now, that's a
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 40: little gift.
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 7: It's loaded with.
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 2: Lots of sentiment.
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 40: See, whenever I get blue, Santa, I'm going to think
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 40: of you. But at the same time, I will change
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 40: to pay my rent, you see.
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 15: Now, money isn't everything. There's no two.
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 26: Ways about it.
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 40: But while we're here santa dear it's much better with
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 40: and without it so really i could be real good
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 40: and not do nothing funny if you do like i
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 40: asked you start me right on.
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 4: Christmas night try me try me try me on that
• 1:02:56
  Speaker 4: money just try me honey.
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 7: Santa can you hear me You listen.
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 2: To everything I'm asking about?
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 40: Listen, Santa dear, the new year. Oh, it would be
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 40: so bright and sunny. Just bring me that little simple
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 40: thing I've been speaking to you about. Maybe a five
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 40: pound box of money.
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 9: That's all.
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 2: That's all.
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 40: It would be so heavenly and help me meet both ends.
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 15: Yes, indeed. What the whole world.
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 40: Really needs is that five pound box of tin.
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 2: How much can it weigh?
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 5: I ask you, how much?
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 40: I don't want the whole money tree. What good is
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 40: that big thing to me? You keep the branches. You
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 40: can keep the trunk and the root. Because all that
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 40: I want is just a little.
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 35: Bit of the fruit.
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 40: So if you want to be sure, I'll be your
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 40: little old honey, honey bunny.
• 1:03:57
  Speaker 15: You try to start me off on.
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 40: Christmas night with a five pound.
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 15: No, I better increase that.
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 9: Make it ten pounds. No, I better put it up.
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 40: You could beg while I'm begging, because, I mean, I'll
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 40: catch you next year.
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 7: You know, people go out.
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 40: Sometimes you don't see them no more, so bring the money.
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 23: Santa!
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 16: Can you hear me?
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 19: Fine!
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 15: Bring me some money!
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 4: Oh, Santa!
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 29: Now, what do I want with this dime?
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 15: Are you kidding?
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 24: It's Christmas, and we're all in misery.
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 4: Santa Claus conquers the Martians! Santa sets up a fantastic
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 4: automatic toy factory on Mars. The Martian leader battles the
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 4: wicked Bodar in a desperate effort to save Santa, the
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 4: wise man of Mars.
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 19: 900 years old.
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 4: The Battle of the Toys, when Martian kids and Earth
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 4: kids join Santa to battle the bad guys of Mars.
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 12: For real space age fun.
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 4: You'll be out of this world when Santa Claus Conquers
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 4: the Martians.
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 23: Hey guys, it's the repeater from Tower of Technobabble, and
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 23: we're getting ready to do our next show, and I
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 23: thought it might be cool for you to look behind
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 23: the scenes and.
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 15: See how the magic happens.
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 10: In fact, Conduit is getting Towerbot ready.
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 30: Right now as we speak.
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 41: That.
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 1: Religions.
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 10: Need it.
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 1: Science.
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 3: Got it.
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 24: Sci-fi.
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 18: Do you mean sci-fi?
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 8: Space probes.
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 1: Got it.
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 20: Sports.
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 28: Screw that.
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 1: Star Wars.
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 10: Got it. Star Wars prequels.
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 15: Oh, God, no.
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 34: Superman.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 3: Got it.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 2: Transformers.
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 3: Got it.
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 5: Troll Hunter.
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 1: Got it.
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 31: Twilight.
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 38: That.
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 9: UFOs.
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 3: Got it.
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 7: Urban legends.
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 1: That's weird tales.
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 8: Got it.
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 1: Weirdos. Got it.
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 10: Tune in at www.toweroftechnobattle.com and see what happens.
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 7: What do you say when you saw that fucking Freud? Yeah,
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 7: that's right, shit for brains.
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 5: Go ahead, talk about my hype.
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 4: Make it about something safe, because you're an emotional fucking cripple.
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 15: Your soul is dog shit.
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 26: Every single fucking thing about you is ugly.
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 2: All right, then.
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 7: Yoko, what do you have?
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 36: I don't like Christmas or Christmas movies. I was like,
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 36: I don't know what I'm going to do. So I
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 36: started really thinking, and I came up with two things. Okay,
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 36: so when I.
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 13: Was a kid... I had like the Home Alone movies, right?
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 13: On like VHS.
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 7: I'm sorry.
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 11: Yeah, no.
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 36: Here's the thing that's weird about my childhood is there
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 36: were things I really liked watching and there were things
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 36: I really hated watching. But I would watch them the
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 36: same frequency. Like I would watch things I really hated
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 36: a lot over and over and over. Like I would
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 36: watch that like live action Winnie the Pooh show, the
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 36: 100 Acre Woods. And I remember when it would go up,
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 36: I'm like, I'm so glad it's over. And I just
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 36: never put the connection together that I didn't have to
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 36: watch it.
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 2: Were you seeking them out or you were just like
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 2: one of the kids that parked it and was like,
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 2: whatever's on.
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 13: I guess. I don't know.
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 36: It's so strange to me now. Like when I think
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 36: about stuff like that. And the Home Alone movies were
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 36: definitely like that because I really hated them. But I've
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 36: probably seen them like 17 times. And the one that
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 36: is particularly repulsive is the sequel. And when you're asking
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 36: me about a Christmas song, the only thing I could
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 36: think about was the one that Tim Carey sings in
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 36: that movie. Now, you guys probably think I don't remember any.
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 36: christmas songs in that movie um but i want to
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 36: i want to take a minute to just think about
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 36: tim curry and i want to i want to say
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 36: why why is tim curry more frightening without makeup than
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 36: with makeup because when he's like a monster or painted
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 36: like he's not that frightening but when he is completely
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 36: like human with no makeup he's terrifying and he was
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 36: in that movie as like a A bellhop guy or something,
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 36: like some kind of hotel thing. And he's in the
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 36: shower singing that panther song, the cougar song or whatever.
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 11: No, wait.
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 36: Is he singing that or did he walk in on
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 36: an inflatable man singing that in the shower?
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 13: What a troubled childhood, guys.
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 34: That's another one of those songs that I had never
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 34: had any idea what they were saying. I thought they
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 34: were saying Cool Whip or Cool Jerk or Cougar.
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 24: I think it.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 36: May have been a Cool Whip commercial at one point,
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 36: which probably further confused. So was he in the shower
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 36: or was he an inflatable guy? I think it may
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 36: have been a Macaulay Culkin hoax type thing that he
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 36: was doing.
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 35: Oh, man.
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 36: I really liked his later movies a lot, but when
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 36: he was a little kid, I kind of just hated
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 36: him with everything as another little kid.
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 7: Very specific delivery.
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 13: So that's my Christmas song, guys, which is strange.
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I was never really big on the Home Alone
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 2: movies either. I always thought, I didn't really hate the
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 2: sappy parts of it. I mean, you don't really get
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 2: that in a holiday movie. You gotta have the weepy
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 2: part with the old man next door and all that nonsense,
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 2: but it was just the goofy slapstick hitting people in
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 2: the face was.
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 2: I just thought it was such a dumbed-down holiday classic.
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 2: But a holiday classic it has become, regardless. But I
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 2: will give Yoko credit that this is an odd choice
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 2: for this holiday special, and that's why I like putting
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 2: these together with everyone choosing whatever their choices are, because
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 2: everybody sort of remembers things differently and attaches themselves to
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 2: different things over the years.
• 1:09:46
  Speaker 7: So.
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 2: Yes, it is actually not Tim Curry singing. He's the
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 2: one that's coming in the room, looking at the person
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 2: in that room, which is actually Kevin. And Kevin's actually
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 2: hiding in the shower with an inflatable clown, weirdly enough.
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 2: And he's dancing around with ropes. And again, it's very ridiculous.
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 2: And I guess when you're a kid, maybe it was funny,
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 2: but it's quite ridiculous. But it's not Tim Curry doing
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 2: this song. It is, in fact, the Capitals singing. who
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 2: are singing not any of those other weird things Marlena said,
• 1:10:20
  Speaker 2: but Cool Jerk, she did work it in there somewhere,
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 2: is the name of this song. So here is your
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 2: holiday tie-in classic, Cool Jerk.
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 3: Cool Jerk.
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 15: Cool Jerk Cool Jerk Cool Jerk.
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 9: We don't care if you really do love you. We'll
• 1:10:52
  Speaker 9: be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right back.
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 15: Now give me a.
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 9: Little bit of a drum by himself there.
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 7: Now give me a little bit of bass with those 88s.
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 9: Are you looking for something else?
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 13: .
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 15: .
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 9: .
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 15: .
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 9: .
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 13: I just don't like Christmas.
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 34: Sorry, I don't.
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 36: I don't celebrate it. I just don't like it. But
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 36: I do like the Peanuts Christmas. I just really love.
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 13: The peanuts in general.
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 36: And I dig it when, at the end, they're just
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 36: all dancing to Linus and Lucy. If you guys ever
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 36: watched them individually dancing.
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 7: It's very strange.
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 37: I just wish that every party had that happen.
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 24: That's it.
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 35: I don't know.
• 1:13:13
  Speaker 7: That soundtrack is phenomenal. I could listen to that on
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 7: loop forever.
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 2: It doesn't even register fully that it's Peanuts anymore.
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 7: It's just its own thing.
• 1:13:23
  Speaker 10: It's just a drummer, a bass player... and you know
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 10: the piano and it's just it's so it's like now
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 10: a Christmas song requires to have bells and jingling and
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 10: little sonic snowflakes falling.
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 13: Sounds like something Dre produced.
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 10: Yeah and it's just like it's so oh god it's
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 10: wonderful and the room sounds so echoey in it it's
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 10: amazing oh my gosh I.
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 36: Love that album I always think of Snoopy when he's
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 36: dancing because he dances with his head like completely like
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 36: towards the ceiling He's got.
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 13: That little smile.
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 7: Snoopy dances like nobody's watching.
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 2: He does.
• 1:14:02
  Speaker 7: Sign on, you crazy diamond.
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 2: Well, I will say, I'll go on record. In his movies,
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 2: it's a whole different thing. But I've realized over the
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 2: years what a... weird fan I am of Tim Curry's
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 2: musical career and that's hard to claim because nobody else
• 1:14:22
  Speaker 2: will acknowledge.
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 24: It not just Paradise Garage but other songs.
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 2: Well that's one of like it comes on like it's
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 2: on my phone on me right now and uh like.
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 39: The Cougar song no like when Paradise Garage I'm like
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 39: this is an amazing song like it gets grouped in
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 39: with that whole little group of you know songs that
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 39: came attached to that movie and that's the only reason
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 39: he pays attention to it but I'm like that one's
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 39: amazing but like.
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 2: The other one, like, those are really cheesy. Like, I
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 2: Do the Rock is really cheesy. But, like, you go
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 2: to his other stuff, like, the stuff that was the
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 2: album track.
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 24: I can't remember.
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 11: They're super serious.
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 34: I remember, like, I put that album on my, before, like,
• 1:14:58
  Speaker 34: iPods were a thing, and it had, like, a different thing.
• 1:15:00
  Speaker 34: I remember listening to that, and I don't remember what
• 1:15:02
  Speaker 34: song it is. I can't tell you what it was named.
• 1:15:03
  Speaker 34: But there was, like, one song on there that was, like,
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 34: really rocking, and I was super into it. I think
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 34: it was, like, Really Deep or something.
• 1:15:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, there's two or three that I legitimately
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 2: think are amazingly well-written songs. And it's like, you have
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 2: to disconnect yourself, and you're like, wait, this is Tim Curry?
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 7: But, like, there's several that are so well done.
• 1:15:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think he never got any respect because he's
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 2: very ridiculous, and, like, he had his movie persona, and his,
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 2: you know, he was so well known in his other
• 1:15:31
  Speaker 2: worlds that, like, I guess just nobody took him seriously.
• 1:15:35
  Speaker 11: Well, he's one of those people, he's like a bigger
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 11: than life actor.
• 1:15:40
  Speaker 12: He is.
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 11: When he tries to play life size, he's.
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 36: Just horrible i guess why he's terrifying to me when
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 36: he's like that it is but you know if you
• 1:15:48
  Speaker 36: see him trying just being a guy in a movie
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 36: he's helpless but if he's like almost a cartoon.
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 13: Character like pennywise totally.
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 11: Believable he can sell that in a way.
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 7: Darkness like he's amazing at.
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 11: A level of like nicholas cage and raising arizona it's
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 11: like that guy is a cartoon Um, and I remember in.
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 34: Home Alone, the scene where he, like, smiles and he
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 34: looks so much like the Grinch.
• 1:16:17
  Speaker 13: And I remember I waited.
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 34: I was like, I hope they make a live-action Grinch. Like,
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 34: I remember thinking as a kid, I hope they make
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 34: a live-action Grinch movie and cast Tim Curry.
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 24: And then they fucking cast Jim Carrey.
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 13: Got the wrong Carrey.
• 1:16:28
  Speaker 1: Carrey.
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 7: Carrey.
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 24: Carrey.
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 37: Not the same.
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 24: Tim Curry, Jim Carrey.
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 7: Tim Wise.
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 31: Close.
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 11: I always think of Tim Rice when I think of
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 11: Tim Curry.
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 34: Tim Curry and Rice. They should team up and start
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 34: a cop show. Actually, the last time I saw Tim Curry,
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 34: he was on an episode of Criminal Minds.
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 24: He played like a... A criminal?
• 1:16:47
  Speaker 7: A killer?
• 1:16:47
  Speaker 37: A mind.
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 24: He was like a PETA rapist or something like that.
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 29: PETA rapist.
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 24: And his face is, like, saggy. Peto?
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 13: Oh, that's even worse. Jeez.
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 11: I heard Peter.
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 7: I thought she.
• 1:17:04
  Speaker 13: Said Peter Rapist.
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 36: And I thought it was a new thing the kids
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 36: said to describe just, like, a rapist on a crime show.
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 13: See, I assume it's really strange.
• 1:17:14
  Speaker 7: I assume that's a cop show. It's the worst cop
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 7: show ever.
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 24: A Peter Rapist.
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 23: A pedo.
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 11: I heard people for ethical treatment of animals.
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 7: That's uncool.
• 1:17:25
  Speaker 34: American people and I am American, so I'm really just
• 1:17:28
  Speaker 34: being a pretentious douchebag right now.
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 24: Pedo rapist.
• 1:17:32
  Speaker 13: Right, because the English call it pedo.
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 34: There was this episode of IT Crowd where she was
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 34: dating a guy named Peterphile. And, like, British people say pedophile.
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 24: And I haven't been able.
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 34: I can't even force myself to say pedophile since then. Like,
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 34: it's just, like, stuck in my brain. It's just, like,
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 34: where my mind goes.
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 37: Pedophile.
• 1:17:53
  Speaker 7: Britton, you're warping her mind.
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 31: I know.
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 24: I hope you're happy. So true. And also, from watching, like,
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 24: a lot of Mighty Boosh... I love that show. I
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 24: say beeswax.
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 34: Sometimes I say things and sound like old Greg.
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 24: And I haven't watched that show in years.
• 1:18:08
  Speaker 15: But, like.
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 24: I said something.
• 1:18:11
  Speaker 34: About beeswax candles a couple months ago, and it came out,
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 34: beeswax candles.
• 1:18:16
  Speaker 15: I don't know why.
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 24: And I say things like that all the time. And
• 1:18:20
  Speaker 24: it's just like, it's so weird.
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 23: Bolos.
• 1:18:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but I think anybody who knows you is just like,
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 2: that's Marla.
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 24: No one questions it, but I mean, like, if I
• 1:18:29
  Speaker 24: were to introduce new people into.
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 2: My life, they'd probably be like, what the hell is
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 2: wrong with you?
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 7: It takes us all a little while to be like,
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 7: I don't know.
• 1:18:36
  Speaker 24: There's a period of adjustment.
• 1:18:40
  Speaker 7: It all makes sense in time. Hands out a pamphlet.
• 1:18:45
  Speaker 24: Yeah.
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 7: Christmas.
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 11: Yeah, you do reach an age where you have to
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 11: come with instructions. Like when a car gets so messed up,
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 11: if somebody wants to borrow your car, you have to
• 1:18:58
  Speaker 11: tell them a bunch of stuff.
• 1:18:59
  Speaker 7: Yeah, let me write it down. You need to do that.
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 11: Well, it's like opening up a VCR and there's instructions.
• 1:19:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 24: Yeah.
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 11: So what's your Christmas song, Brian?
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 7: I don't know. Do you want me to pick one?
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 25: Yeah.
• 1:19:16
  Speaker 2: Again, I choose my Christmas movies and music a little different.
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 2: And even, as I said, if the songs are traditional,
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 2: I immediately draw from a different place. So I think
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 2: this episode we should go out much like they go
• 1:19:32
  Speaker 2: out in one of my favorite Christmas movies.
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 7: Die Hard.
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 2: Because that's immediately what I think of with Christmas movies
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 2: is that.
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 7: Not Lethal Weapon? That's my other one. Those are my
• 1:19:45
  Speaker 7: two go-tos for Christmas movies. I'm not going.
• 1:19:49
  Speaker 2: To add Getaway to that. But, you know, it's Die Hard,
• 1:19:53
  Speaker 2: Lethal Weapon. These are my Christmas movies.
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 36: Gremlins.
• 1:19:58
  Speaker 7: Gremlins is also good.
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 24: Yeah, that's a good one.
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 7: We've also got that one, too.
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 11: Well, in the original Home Alone.
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 11: Klaus Kinski originated the role. It was called Das kindereste
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 11: Interzimmer mit keinem Alter Leute. It was a German expressionist. Later,
• 1:20:17
  Speaker 11: the Home Alone was based on that early German.
• 1:20:21
  Speaker 7: I thought you were making a joke.
• 1:20:23
  Speaker 13: And then I realized it wasn't a joke.
• 1:20:25
  Speaker 37: It was facts.
• 1:20:25
  Speaker 2: He mixed stuff up.
• 1:20:28
  Speaker 7: Actually, I got my father to translate.
• 1:20:30
  Speaker 11: I asked him, Years ago, because he taught German, what's
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 11: the most complicated way you could say home alone in German?
• 1:20:39
  Speaker 11: And it was, das kinder ist in der Zimmer mit kind,
• 1:20:43
  Speaker 11: with no old people. And I can't remember the last time.
• 1:20:46
  Speaker 11: The child is home with no old people. Because people
• 1:20:49
  Speaker 11: used to come into the art gallery and ask if
• 1:20:51
  Speaker 11: the inflatable scream figure was the kid from Home Alone.
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 11: And I started telling them yes because it was.
• 1:20:59
  Speaker 7: The original Home Alone. That's beautiful.
• 1:21:02
  Speaker 11: Yeah.
• 1:21:04
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 1:21:05
  Speaker 2: That's funny.
• 1:21:06
  Speaker 34: Who knew that Macaulay Culkin was pulling from such a deep,
• 1:21:09
  Speaker 34: deep source?
• 1:21:10
  Speaker 7: Michael Jackson.
• 1:21:11
  Speaker 10: He knew.
• 1:21:12
  Speaker 7: Oh, that's so much worse now. That's alleged. That has
• 1:21:18
  Speaker 7: never been proven.
• 1:21:19
  Speaker 13: He got acquitted twice.
• 1:21:21
  Speaker 36: I'm going to defend the King of Pop.
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 15: I will, always.
• 1:21:26
  Speaker 13: I love Michael Jackson. Do you guys remember when he died?
• 1:21:28
  Speaker 36: You couldn't forget because it was all over everything forever.
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 36: I convinced somebody. I like to lie to people.
• 1:21:35
  Speaker 13: I convinced somebody with a little certainty.
• 1:21:37
  Speaker 36: That did not know Michael Jackson was dead and I
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 36: was in shock, feigned shock. She was near tears, so
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 36: she didn't know that Michael had died.
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 7: I prefer Jackson 5-0.
• 1:21:48
  Speaker 36: I love Michael just all forms of how he transcended.
• 1:21:51
  Speaker 36: It became like a, extraterrestrial being like.
• 1:21:54
  Speaker 7: I i just i was not so into that part i.
• 1:21:56
  Speaker 13: Just man i just i don't know dude.
• 1:21:58
  Speaker 36: Dangerous he's from that same like planet that david bowie
• 1:22:02
  Speaker 36: and tim curry are from like that that might be
• 1:22:05
  Speaker 36: true actually yeah like i just can see that love
• 1:22:08
  Speaker 36: those weird people i.
• 1:22:08
  Speaker 34: Just i loved how that the second he died everyone
• 1:22:11
  Speaker 34: was suddenly like like years of hate america in the
• 1:22:14
  Speaker 34: world hating michael jackson.
• 1:22:16
  Speaker 7: Everyone mostly america he was.
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 39: A cultural hero or like whatever like He still toured
• 1:22:21
  Speaker 39: throughout the rest of the world.
• 1:22:21
  Speaker 7: We don't know what you got until it's gone.
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 36: Right?
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 15: Right.
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 36: That's what it should be called, the Michael Jackson story.
• 1:22:27
  Speaker 7: You don't know what you got.
• 1:22:29
  Speaker 2: Until it's gone.
• 1:22:29
  Speaker 13: Don't stop until you get enough.
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 37: That's my favorite Michael Jackson story.
• 1:22:33
  Speaker 10: Yeah, when I go home, the sign for Indiana, it
• 1:22:36
  Speaker 10: usually says Lincoln's Boyhood Home.
• 1:22:37
  Speaker 11: It should say Lincoln's Boyhood Home.
• 1:22:38
  Speaker 36: Michael jackson's boy indiana stop the scariest place i know
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 36: they should put like a michael jackson like straight up
• 1:22:45
  Speaker 36: like a music park in gary indiana.
• 1:22:46
  Speaker 34: They should just there needs to be something it looks
• 1:22:48
  Speaker 34: like afghanistan there's random fires everywhere yeah fires everywhere.
• 1:22:52
  Speaker 2: Just need to have like a big michael jackson statue
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 2: like that robocop when they're gonna.
• 1:22:56
  Speaker 34: Put you know i remember once i think it was
• 1:22:59
  Speaker 34: the speed museum they were There's, like, a famous statue
• 1:23:02
  Speaker 34: of Michael Jackson and his monkey.
• 1:23:03
  Speaker 1: Oh, yes.
• 1:23:04
  Speaker 7: It was gold.
• 1:23:05
  Speaker 9: No, no, no, no.
• 1:23:06
  Speaker 13: It was painted.
• 1:23:07
  Speaker 7: I remember this artist.
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 24: I know who you're talking about.
• 1:23:09
  Speaker 13: And is it, like, he, like, laying, like, reclined, and
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 13: he has the chimp, and it's, like, painted.
• 1:23:13
  Speaker 7: It looks like the statue of Athena. It's that guy, Jeff.
• 1:23:16
  Speaker 11: What's his name?
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 24: I can't remember.
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 13: I can see it in my brain.
• 1:23:19
  Speaker 11: I think it came to the Speed Art Museum.
• 1:23:21
  Speaker 24: Is it the guy that's a balloon animal?
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 35: Yeah, Coombs.
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 37: Yeah, I know what you're talking about.
• 1:23:27
  Speaker 13: Yeah, that's right. So that came here?
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 24: I think so, yeah.
• 1:23:31
  Speaker 13: Balloon animals. All right. I can't say I'm a fan, but.
• 1:23:37
  Speaker 11: Balloon animals?
• 1:23:38
  Speaker 7: No, I love balloon animals.
• 1:23:39
  Speaker 11: It's the song I find myself singing.
• 1:23:40
  Speaker 7: What are you not a fan of? That artist. He's
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 7: not really that famous.
• 1:23:43
  Speaker 11: That's the one that just like, when I'm tired and dumb,
• 1:23:49
  Speaker 11: I just find myself going, oh, balloons.
• 1:23:55
  Speaker 13: It's a very head trauma-like song.
• 1:23:58
  Speaker 11: Yeah, and it's really hard to sit. We had this conversation.
• 1:24:01
  Speaker 38: Have we had this conversation about the backup?
• 1:24:03
  Speaker 12: Yeah.
• 1:24:03
  Speaker 11: They tried to make it just insufferable, so they released
• 1:24:07
  Speaker 11: the record, and they released it anyway.
• 1:24:11
  Speaker 7: I'm Elvis. I can do whatever I want.
• 1:24:12
  Speaker 37: I mean, Elvis didn't want it. No, Elvis didn't want
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 37: it released.
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 7: It's hard, but it doesn't matter.
• 1:24:15
  Speaker 37: Elvis was like, they want me to sing this song.
• 1:24:17
  Speaker 37: I think this song is garbage.
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 7: I think enough things are blue.
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 38: I want you to just make the silliest noises you
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 38: possibly can, so the recording of it will be completely unlistenable,
• 1:24:26
  Speaker 38: and they'll be like, no, that was a terrible idea.
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 37: You were right, Elvis. And so they came up with that, like, da-da-da-da-da,
• 1:24:31
  Speaker 37: and he was like, yes, that's perfect.
• 1:24:32
  Speaker 7: You nailed it. This is awful. And they were like,
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 7: we love it. Bring it on.
• 1:24:35
  Speaker 37: And it became, like, his most identifiable Christmas hit.
• 1:24:38
  Speaker 3: Nice.
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 22: So, yeah.
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 11: Christmas songs.
• 1:24:48
  Speaker 2: Alright, well and that rounds things out here at the
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 2: old Attack of the Killer soundtrack holiday special. But as
• 1:24:59
  Speaker 2: I said, I think we need to go out the
• 1:25:01
  Speaker 2: way Die Hard goes out. With let it snow, let
• 1:25:04
  Speaker 2: it snow, let it snow.
• 1:25:05
  Speaker 15: Welcome to the party, pal!
• 1:25:06
  Speaker 2: So as the cops roll up to clean up this
• 1:25:09
  Speaker 2: mess of the building I've just blown up, I will
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 2: say once again, thank you for joining us for this
• 1:25:13
  Speaker 2: little holiday adventure here. And if nothing else, you know,
• 1:25:17
  Speaker 2: you have a happy holiday of your choice or enjoy
• 1:25:21
  Speaker 2: Life Day. And in this season, I will remind you,
• 1:25:25
  Speaker 2: get a life and we'll provide the holiday soundtrack. Thank
• 1:25:29
  Speaker 2: you for listening.
• 1:25:33
  Speaker 1: Oh, the weather outside is frightful But the fire is
• 1:25:38
  Speaker 1: so delightful And since we've no place to go ¶ Let.
• 1:25:44
  Speaker 9: It snow, let it.
• 1:25:45
  Speaker 1: Snow, let it snow ¶ ¶ It doesn't show signs
• 1:25:49
  Speaker 1: of stopping ¶ ¶ And I brought some corn for
• 1:25:53
  Speaker 1: popping ¶ ¶ The lights are turned way down low
• 1:25:58
  Speaker 1: ¶ ¶ Let.
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 31: It snow, let it snow, let it snow.
• 1:26:01
  Speaker 1: ¶ ¶ Let me finally kiss goodnight ¶ ¶ Oh,
• 1:26:06
  Speaker 1: I hate going out in the storm ¶ ¶ But
• 1:26:10
  Speaker 1: if you really hold me tight ¶ All the way
• 1:26:15
  Speaker 1: home I'll be.
• 1:26:17
  Speaker 15: Warm.
• 1:26:17
  Speaker 1: The fire is slowly dying, and my dear, we're still goodbying.
• 1:26:25
  Speaker 1: But as long as you love me so, let it snow,
• 1:26:29
  Speaker 1: let it snow, let it snow. When we finally kiss goodnight,
• 1:26:36
  Speaker 1: how I hate going out.
• 1:26:38
  Speaker 8: In the storm.
• 1:26:39
  Speaker 1: But if you really hold me tight, all the.
• 1:26:44
  Speaker 15: Way home I'll be warm.
• 1:26:47
  Speaker 1: The fire is slowly dying, and my dear, we're still goodbying.
• 1:26:54
  Speaker 1: But as long as you love me so, let it snow,
• 1:27:00
  Speaker 1: let it snow, let it snow.
• 1:27:24
  Speaker 7: Angel agrees.
• 1:27:25
  Speaker 9: Hey!
• 1:27:25
  Speaker 7: What's your choice, Angel?
• 1:27:27
  Speaker 11: Hark the herald angels sing.
• 1:27:29
  Speaker 7: Hark the herald angels sing.
• 1:27:33
  Speaker 3: This episode is a production of Movie Meltdown, produced and
• 1:27:36
  Speaker 3: edited by The Oddity Studios, with opening music performed by
• 1:27:39
  Speaker 3: The Empires. For more on how to sponsor or support
• 1:27:42
  Speaker 3: the show, Email producer at moviemeltdown.com.