Latest / Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families / #586 I'll Do Better This Father's Day

Transcript

#586 I'll Do Better This Father's Day · Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast. It's the podcast for the
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: time poor parent who just wants answers.
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: Now, my mom has told me consistently from day one
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: that I'm not as funny as I think that I am.
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: And she has begged me from day one to not
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: try to be funny when I'm giving talks, and don't
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: try to be funny in your books, because justin you're
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: just not funny. I think that I'm way funnier than
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: my mom thinks that I am.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: And now here's the stars of our show, my mom
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: and Dad.
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: Spring. I love springtime. I didn't mention it yesterday because
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: I was talking with James Breakwall the exploding unicorn from Twitter.
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: But spring Kylie, I love the freshness of spring. I
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: love I don't love the magpie swooping, but I love springtime.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: And it's here second of September this weekend Father's Day.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: I don't do Father's Day very well. Have you noticed
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  Speaker 2: that over the last twenty three years of Father's daying,
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: you seem to have.
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: This expectation that just because it's Father's Day, the kids
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: are going to bring out their magical awesomeness.
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  Speaker 2: No, I don't have that it's my dream and my desire.
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: It's not an expectation, it's my and it just never
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: happens unfulfilled. Hope that one Father's Day the kids are
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  Speaker 2: actually not going to fight with each other and just
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: be nice and clean up, and that we're gonna have
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: a this who knows, this Father's Day, it might happen.
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  Speaker 3: It's one of those goldflex moments. Honey. I think you
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  Speaker 3: just need to, you know, catch on to those little, tiny, brief,
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  Speaker 3: minuscule moments of joy.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: Well, I think the other thing with Father's Day and
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: birthdays and all that sort of things, Well, is I'm
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: not a gift kind of person.
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: That's not right. Not you're the most painful person I
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  Speaker 3: have on my gift list.
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  Speaker 2: It's not. It's not because I'm stingy or anything. I
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: actually just don't to me, it's not your love language. No,
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  Speaker 2: the gift is the relationship. It's the time. It's sitting
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  Speaker 2: down and enjoying one another.
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  Speaker 3: Thing publicly giving me an excuse to never have to
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  Speaker 3: buy you another gift? Is that what you're doing?
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  Speaker 2: Well? Kind of, except I still like to get something.
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  Speaker 2: See that's the problem that I know that you've thought
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  Speaker 2: of me but I don't.
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  Speaker 3: So I'm not the gift anymore. The gift is the
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  Speaker 3: thought of gift.
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  Speaker 2: Oh don't do this to me. I just I struggle
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  Speaker 2: with gifts and it's not like you said, it's not
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  Speaker 2: my language. I just don't get it. And Father's Day
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  Speaker 2: this year, I don't have any expectations.
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  Speaker 3: I want another coffee mug.
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  Speaker 2: I just want hugs, and I just want the kids
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  Speaker 2: to be nice to each other and if they can,
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  Speaker 2: if they can help to keep things clean and tidy,
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: and we can just enjoy time together, that'll be fine.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: That's all. I want, nothing much.
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  Speaker 3: You're not asking for much at all.
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: Nothing much at all. Normally on a Friday, we do
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: I'll do better tomorrow. This is a bit where we
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: reflect on the week that was, We talk about what
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: we learned, how it can be be better parents. But
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: today you have something in store for me, and I
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: don't know exactly what it is, but I do know
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: that you and Craig Bruce, our executive producer, have been
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: cooking something up.
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  Speaker 3: Well. You know, we've been celebrating Father's Day this week
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: and you've had conversations with James and the exploding Unicorn.
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  Speaker 2: It was great yesterday.
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but you also talk to Usher and you talk
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: to David Campbell, and you were pretty cruel. You gave
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: them these lightning Round questions and they had to answer
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: them really really fast. And you've done it to me
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: as well a couple of times, and I thought it
• 3:09
  Speaker 3: was about time that you sit in the hot seat.
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  Speaker 2: Can I just highlight nobody does Lightning Round as well.
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: Everyone thinks lightning Round for the first two questions, and
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  Speaker 2: then they get caught up in the questions because they're
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: great questions and they really want to elaborate on their answers.
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  Speaker 3: Well, let's see how well you going.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, Well, I'm not going to say who it was,
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  Speaker 2: but one of the three guests that I had when
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  Speaker 2: I said lightning round normally six to ten minutes, one
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  Speaker 2: of the guests we've had to edit heavily because his
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: Lightning Round went for forty five minutes.
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  Speaker 3: Well, Jr, I want the clock to start.
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  Speaker 2: Don't do it to me. Okay, I'm ready at the
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: same questions that I ask everyone else.
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  Speaker 3: Of course, not that would be unfair.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I've had time to think about any answers to
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  Speaker 2: those ones. All right, let's hear it. Father's Day with
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  Speaker 2: doctor Tusin Coulson in the hot seat.
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  Speaker 3: Okay, first question, father first or husband first?
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  Speaker 2: Husband, I don't even need to think about it. You
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  Speaker 2: come first one hundred percent.
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  Speaker 3: Well, how do the two roles interact with each other?
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  Speaker 2: I know that I'm better as a dad where my
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  Speaker 2: relationship with you is beautiful and settled and connected. When
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: you and I are seeing each other and hearing each
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: other and valuing each other, we are so much better
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: as a team working with our kids. And I firmly
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: believe that the strength of a family in ninety nine
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: point nine percent of cases is founded on the strength
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  Speaker 2: of the relationship between the parents, the biological parents, the
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  Speaker 2: mother and the father, or if the family isn't together,
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: the way they co parent, all the way that the
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: step parents integrate, the quality of the parental relationship the
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  Speaker 2: adults in the room. That is the foundation of the family.
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  Speaker 2: And I've watched it again and again and feel it
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  Speaker 2: in our family every time.
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  Speaker 3: It's you first, Thanks, honey. Three things that make you
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  Speaker 3: a good dad? Actually I always say great dad.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, thanks, You've really put me on the spot here,
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  Speaker 2: I think Number one, I love my kids.
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  Speaker 3: I just love them.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: And they drive me up the wall in so many ways,
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  Speaker 2: and I get it wrong all the time, but I
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  Speaker 2: love them to death. I just am crazy about them.
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  Speaker 2: Number Two, you you make me a great dad because
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  Speaker 2: of the way that you believe in me, in the
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  Speaker 2: way that you forgive me, in the way that you
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  Speaker 2: encourage me to be better. And the third thing, I'm
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: actually going to say four because I can't help myself.
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  Speaker 2: I've always got too much to say. The study that
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  Speaker 2: I've done, the input, the work that I've done to
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  Speaker 2: learn what it is that makes a great dad. I
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  Speaker 2: still don't implement it all, but the stuff that I've
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  Speaker 2: learned that has undoubtedly made me a much better dad
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  Speaker 2: than I would have been otherwise. And the fourth thing,
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: and this is a really personal thing and something that
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: we don't talk about on the podcast very much at all,
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: but my faith. The things that we believe in our
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: faith about families and about the eternal nature of our relationships.
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  Speaker 2: It makes me so grateful and so committed to making
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: sure that these relationships are right because I believe that
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  Speaker 2: they last forever for eternity. It's not till death to
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  Speaker 2: his part. I believe that families are forever and that
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  Speaker 2: makes me so deeply committed to being a great dad. Gosh,
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  Speaker 2: you've got me crying.
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  Speaker 3: I don't know how we're going to get through this, Honey.
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  Speaker 3: Were there things that you promised yourself you wouldn't do?
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  Speaker 2: No, I never thought that much about it. You know this.
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  Speaker 2: When we've started having kids, I had no idea what
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  Speaker 2: was going on. I had no idea whatsoever, and I
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  Speaker 2: made all the mistakes that you can make. I think
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: over time, I've promised myself multiple times that I won't
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  Speaker 2: hit the kids, or I won't call the kids' names,
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  Speaker 2: or I won't do any of those punitive, horrible things
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  Speaker 2: that we're not supposed to do with our kids, or
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  Speaker 2: yell and shout and get angry, that I'll always keep
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  Speaker 2: it cool. And I haven't kept those promises to myself
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  Speaker 2: or to the kids on some of those things. Some
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  Speaker 2: of them I've done really well on, and some of
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  Speaker 2: them I haven't. Because I'm a human and it's really
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  Speaker 2: hard to be a parent. I guess in the early days, No,
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  Speaker 2: I didn't make any promises, and I've found it really
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  Speaker 2: hard to fulfill the promises that I have made to
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  Speaker 2: myself or to the kids since then. But I try
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  Speaker 2: real hard.
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  Speaker 3: We've got six incredible children. What do you hope your
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  Speaker 3: influence on them has been.
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  Speaker 2: That they know that they are valued, not for anything
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  Speaker 2: that they do, or anything that they possess, or anything
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  Speaker 2: that they give to the world or give to whoever,
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  Speaker 2: but that they just know that inherently they are worthy,
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  Speaker 2: that they are wonderful, that they are loved no matter what.
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  Speaker 3: How do you see yourself in our children's personalities? Oh?
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  Speaker 2: Boy, I see impulsivity. I see a lot of emotionality.
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  Speaker 2: I see enthusiasm in several of the kids, and a
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  Speaker 2: lack of regulation. You know, like I am kind of
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  Speaker 2: a bit excitable, and several of our children are as well.
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  Speaker 2: I also see their earnestness. And one thing that I'm
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  Speaker 2: going to accuse myself of is sometimes I'm just a
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  Speaker 2: bit too earnest. I take life pretty seriously. Sometimes I
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  Speaker 2: think some things really do matter and should be taken seriously,
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  Speaker 2: and I kind of get caught up in it all.
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  Speaker 2: And so I see that as well. And as much
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  Speaker 2: as I love to say that I'm not into competition
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  Speaker 2: at all, I do become competitive, which is kind of
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  Speaker 2: why I don't like competition. And we have got a
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  Speaker 2: couple of kids who are competitive. Last response, there is
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  Speaker 2: a wonderful level of commitment to trying to be a
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  Speaker 2: good person that I see in every one of our kids.
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  Speaker 2: And I don't know if that's an inherent human quality,
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  Speaker 2: but I know that it's something that I strive for
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  Speaker 2: every day of my life.
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  Speaker 3: Was there one single trait you wanted our children to have.
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  Speaker 2: I'm going to say, too, the first trait that I
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  Speaker 2: want them to have is faith. Again, that comes back
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  Speaker 2: to our personal background, but you could generalize that to
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  Speaker 2: say faith in goodness, faith that things will work out,
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  Speaker 2: that hope, that hopefulness, I think in hoping good things
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  Speaker 2: to come is probably the most important trait that we
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  Speaker 2: can have in our children. So I know I said two,
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  Speaker 2: but I'm going to make it one. Okay, And after
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: the break, because time is getting away already, give me
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  Speaker 2: a taste of what I'm in for.
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  Speaker 3: Right after the break, Well, we're going to take you
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  Speaker 3: back to when you were twelve years of age. We
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  Speaker 3: also are going to put your funniness on the line.
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: Between fifteen and twenty percent of teens have anxiety. Anxiety
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: is one of the leading causes of mental illness in
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: our children, and as parents, we want to know where
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: is it coming from? Can we stop it? And how
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: do we help our children just feel better? Start by
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: learning how to recognize anxiety in your child, how to
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: respond and how to give them hope and the anxiety
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: in your child. Webinar can help. It's available at happy
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: families dot com dot au.
• 9:57
  Speaker 3: It's the Happy Families podcast, the podcast for a time
• 10:00
  Speaker 3: poor parent who just wants answers now. And today we're
• 10:03
  Speaker 3: giving Justin a bit of a run for his money.
• 10:05
  Speaker 3: He is in the hot seat. We're doing a lightning round.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, what's the next question?
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  Speaker 3: Okay, So, if I was to ask a young Justin Coulson,
• 10:13
  Speaker 3: I'm thinking back to like twelve years of age, yeah,
• 10:15
  Speaker 3: to describe his dad? How would you have described dad?
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  Speaker 2: Since I was about ten, I've had a memory deeply
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: etched into my brain of one moment in particular, two
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: moments in particular of my dad, and I have to
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: share the stories briefly to explain my answer. One of
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: those memories was when my dad used to have a
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: milk run delivered the milk daughter door, and I used
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: to go with him and we'd pulled the milk cartons
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: out of the back of the truck and run them
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: and put them on the doorstep. I remember one night
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: we were driving along a dirt road and there was
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: a bloke laying in the middle of the road, just
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: a big lump of a man laying in the middle
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: of the road. He'd been at the pub down the road.
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: He started to walk home and decided that the road
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: was the good place as they need to have a sleep,
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: and my dad helped him to get up. He put
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: him in the back of the truck. He drove him
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: home and pulled his wallet out and found where his
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: address was, and he drove him home and helped him.
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: And I just I remembered that goodness in my dad,
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: that willingness to go completely out of his way, potentially
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: even in danger himself, so that he could help this
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: man who was clearly not in a good way. A
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: couple of years later, when I was ten, my grandfather died.
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: I remember seeing my dad cry for the first time
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: as he spoke at that funeral, gave the eulogy, he
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: shared a poem that's actually not even that good. I
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: finally found it a few years ago, as a poem
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: that's called I follow a noble father. Hearing my dad
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  Speaker 2: stand at that pulpit and read this poem about the
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: way he admired his noble father, it affected me so
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: deeply and it still does today. And so this nearly
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: fifty year old guy that you're sitting in front of
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  Speaker 2: right now, reflecting on that twelve year old boy, I
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: know that I would have remembered that I followed the
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: noble father.
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  Speaker 3: Fathers have an outsized influence on us. You've just so
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: beautifully demonstrated that in the stories that you've shared about
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: Dad and whether or not we like it, O kids
• 12:15
  Speaker 3: see all of it. Do you ever think about how
• 12:18
  Speaker 3: you're perceived by our kids and what they think of you,
• 12:21
  Speaker 3: and how that makes them feel?
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: Never endingly? And that's why I do what I do?
• 12:27
  Speaker 3: Out of ten? How funny do you think you are? Oh?
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  Speaker 2: That is such an unfair question. You get me all weepy,
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: and then you ask me a question like that. I've
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: grown up in a home where my mom has told
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: me consistently from day one that I'm not as funny
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  Speaker 2: as I think that I am, and she has begged
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  Speaker 2: me from day one to not try to be funny
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  Speaker 2: when I'm giving talks, and don't try to be funny
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: in your books, because justin you're just not funny. I
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: think that I'm way funny than my mom thinks that
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  Speaker 2: I am. I'm not a comedian, but I think that
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: I'm clever, funny, and I have fun being funny, and
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: my I think at me while I'm saying this, well,
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: out of ten, come on, all right, I'm going to
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: say that I'm I'm an eight and a half.
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  Speaker 3: You're an eight and a half.
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, nine and above would be comedian level. See
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  Speaker 2: I made you laugh. I'm a funny guy.
• 13:16
  Speaker 3: Well, I may have just asked our kids what score
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: they would have given you out of ten.
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  Speaker 2: Okay, let's listen.
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  Speaker 3: What would you say, Emily about maybe five? What about you?
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  Speaker 2: Lily seven point five? From being nice?
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: Annie seven hour? Well that just depends. Is it funny?
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: Hot or funny? Peculiar?
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: I'd tell him a three, but probably a seven on
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: his good days. Okay, So so I'm a point five
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: according to me. No one else thinks that. Yeah, I'm
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: a funny guy. I'm a funny guy.
• 13:55
  Speaker 3: Did you know I love Emily?
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  Speaker 2: You don't care? All right? Next question, So have you
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: got a dad joke for me, No, not on the spot.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: Come on, okay. My favorite joke I don't think it's
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: a dad joke. I just think it's a great joke
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: is the Alsatian that walked into the post office and
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: said of the postmaster that he wanted to send a telegram.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: And the postmaster said, what would you like to send?
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: And the Alsatian said, wolf wolf Wolf Wolf Wolf Wolf
• 14:22
  Speaker 2: Wolf wolf Wolf, nine wolfs. The postmaster said, you know what,
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: for the same price, you can have an extra wolf.
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: And the Alsatian said, yeah, but then it wouldn't make
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: any sense.
• 14:32
  Speaker 3: I honestly, i don't know what to say about that.
• 14:37
  Speaker 3: I'm just wondering how it's possible for someone to be
• 14:39
  Speaker 3: so smart and capable as you are just told that
• 14:43
  Speaker 3: kind of Oh my goodness. All right right.
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: My other favorite joke, and it's the joke that our
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: daughters love more than any other joke that I tell
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: you know, I'm trying. I'm going to tell, don't you
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: the cowboy rode into town.
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: I can't believe you're going to do this.
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  Speaker 2: Yep, got off the horse, but put the reins around
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: the things that the horse couldn't run away, and then
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: he ran around behind the horse and he lift up
• 15:05
  Speaker 2: the horse's tail and he kissed the horse right right
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: on the well, you know, you know, lift up the
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: tail and right right there, right underneath the tail, kissed
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: the horse right there, and then walked into the bar
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: in order to drink. One of the cowboys that were
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: sitting there had seen the whole thing, leaned over and said,
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: I don't mean to be rude, but I just did
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: I just see you do what I I think I
• 15:23
  Speaker 2: saw you? Just is that? Really? Did you do that?
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: The cowboy looked at me and said, well, yeah I did.
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: And the old cowboy said, why did you kiss your
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: horse on the backside like that? And the cowboy said, well,
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: I've got chapped lips. Stops me looking at me. That's
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: a great joke, so funny. Okay, all right, see what
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: you've done. I was having a really meaningful interview and
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: then you asked me to.
• 15:53
  Speaker 3: Show a because we need to get away from those jokes.
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: Me.
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: I do love you a lot, so I've only got
• 16:03
  Speaker 3: a couple left for you because this is a lightning
• 16:05
  Speaker 3: round and you've taken for rep bar to answer all
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: the questions, just putting it out there.
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: But it's not going to be forty five minutes like
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: someone else I interviewed.
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: Can you tell me briefly about some of the fathers
• 16:16
  Speaker 3: you admire, and specifically people that our audience might be
• 16:23
  Speaker 3: aware of.
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: I don't know any high profile fathers well enough that
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: the audience would be aware of them and to be
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: able to say, Hey, this is who I admire and why.
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: What I can do, though, is I can point to
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: specific attributes of some of the best fathers that I know,
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: and the ones that I admire the most are the
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: ones who are Number one, kind, kind, compassionate, loving, patient,
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: that constellation of attributes that gives their children the benefit
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: of the doubt, allows them the opportunity to make mistakes
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: and grow and be safe in talking to their dad
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: about the difficulties that they're having. That is just so powerful,
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: the kindness and the other one, the other attribute that
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: I admired the most. There's a handful of dads that
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: I know who they've given up work, or they've given
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: up careers, or they've given up any number They've made
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: significant sacrifices for their children so that they can have time.
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: And I know that not everyone has the opportunity to
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: do that, But in so doing, I mean, some of
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: them live in places that they would rather not live,
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: or they go without certain financial benefits that they would
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: really probably much prefer to have, but they've prioritized their
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: children and their family relationships higher than the financial side
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: of things. And I look at those parents and just think,
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: I admire you so very much.
• 17:38
  Speaker 3: Outside of your dad, Are there any other father figures
• 17:42
  Speaker 3: that you've had in your life that you admire?
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: When I left home, I went and did a couple
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: of years of volunteer work for a church, and there's
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: a man and his wife who are sort of in
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: charge of everyone who's doing that volunteer work in the
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: particular area that you go to. That particular man his
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: name was David Knight. What a profound, profound impact he
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: had on me in terms of his extraordinary love. He
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: was just so full of goodness. So he was probably
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: the first of those father figures. I've fell out of
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: touch with him some years after that volunteer work, but
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: my mentor, Wally Goddard, is another example of absolute goodness.
• 18:23
  Speaker 2: He is just so good. And I would probably say
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: that they're the two most obvious. Your dad I mean,
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: he's just such a good man, so patient, so forbearing,
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: so willing to help. I love him as well.
• 18:34
  Speaker 3: Your last question for today, on the eve of Father's Day,
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: is there anything that you'd like to say to our children?
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: Well, they hear it all the time, but I love
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: them no matter what they are. When I think about
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: you and the kids, I'm reminded of saying that I heard.
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: I can't remember where, I don't exactly remember who said
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: it or any of the details around it, but the
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: saying is just everything else is dust. Everything else is dust,
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: None of it matters, and that would be it.
• 19:06
  Speaker 3: Well, this has been a lot more emotional than I
• 19:08
  Speaker 3: expected it would be.
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: But I look at the questions you put together. How
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: did you expect that wouldn't be emotional? I'm my goodness, and.
• 19:15
  Speaker 3: I don't know how well you did on a lightning round.
• 19:18
  Speaker 3: You did take quite a while to answer some of
• 19:20
  Speaker 3: those questions. But I am really really grateful for the
• 19:23
  Speaker 3: conversation we've had today and for the things that you've shared,
• 19:27
  Speaker 3: because obviously, as your experience with fatherhood has unfolded, I
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: have literally had a bird's eye view and I've been
• 19:36
  Speaker 3: there right beside you. Watching you grow and just love
• 19:40
  Speaker 3: on our children, and so I'm really really grateful for
• 19:45
  Speaker 3: the way in which you have chosen to put our
• 19:48
  Speaker 3: family first and put our children first. And as your wife,
• 19:51
  Speaker 3: I'm just I feel so immensely privileged to be a
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: part of your life story and to see so much
• 20:01
  Speaker 3: of your goodness in each of our children and the
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: legacy that you leave behind in each of them. So
• 20:08
  Speaker 3: thank you. Well.
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: It's profoundly and fundamentally change me in every way, and
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: I'm glad we've got to have this chat. Thanks for
• 20:15
  Speaker 2: asking those fun questions. We really hope that you've enjoyed
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: this conversation and we hope that you don't mind as
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: sharing so intimately and personally. We thank you so much
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: for listening to the Happy Families podcast. Have a wonderful,
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: wonderful Father's Day for everyone who is able to celebrate it.
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: For those who are not able to, we really hope
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: that the day is a special day in other ways
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: for you and you can make it meaningful for your family.
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: As always, we appreciate Justin Roland and Craig Bruce. They're
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: the people who make the podcast sound great and turn
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: it into what it actually is. And if you want
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: more info about how to make your family happier, the
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: place to get it is happy families dot com dot
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: au