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We Are ALL Dependents · Enjoying the Journey

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  In our busy world, family time is frequently
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  neglected. It is vital that we give attention to our
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  families while we can, and it is especially important
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  to give attention to what God says in his word about our
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  homes. For the next few moments, let's join Scott Pauley as we
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  open the scriptures and and find God's message for
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  your family.
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  Marriage, at least the right kind of marriage, truly is a partnership.
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  And it is not just a partnership with each other, it's a partnership
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  with the Lord. That's why when people come to a marriage altar,
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  it's a sacred, holy vow, not just with each other, but with
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  the Lord. You're not just entering into a commitment, Commitments can be broken.
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  You're entering into a covenant. A covenant is meant to last.
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  And so we return to 1 Corinthians chapter 11. Verse 3
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  says, but I would have you know that the head of every man is Christ,
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  and the head of the woman is the man, and the head of Christ is
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  God. And then verse 11 and 12 say, nevertheless,
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  neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man in
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  the Lord. For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man
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  also by the woman, but all things of God.
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  We've learned first of all that everybody has to find their place. We all
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  have our place in our home. In fact, in the same book,
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  1 Corinthians 14:40 says that God does all things decently
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  and in order. So God's order is that the Father is
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  the head of Christ, Christ is the head of the husband, and the husband is
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  the head of the wife. It doesn't mean that there's less value
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  as you go down this this order, this structure. It simply means
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  this is God's divine way of keeping peace and giving direction
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  and moving forward. And so we all find
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  our place, we all understand who it is we answer to
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  and are accountable to. And then we not only find our place,
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  we remember a principle. And the principle is that we are all dependent on
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  one another. I say again, it's a partnership.
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  You remember in Genesis 2 when God made Eve and gave
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  her to Adam? He was making a help meet for him.
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  In other words, one that matched, one that was,
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  was to be a completer. We're not competitors in our homes,
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  we are completers. And so what does
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  the man need from the woman? He needs certainly
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  respect. He needs her wisdom.
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  He needs her to minister to him. And on the
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  reverse, what does the woman need from the man? She needs security and
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  honor and love and affection. You ever hear that opposites attract?
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  Well, the man and the woman both bring something to the marriage,
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  and when they remember the principle that they're dependent on one another— somebody
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  said that a marriage is just the union of 2 sovereign states.
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  I like that. And so we're no longer 2, we're one. When we
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  remember that, it makes it so much better. And then ultimately, we both
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  need the Lord. It's all the Lord. Jesus said in John 15:5,
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  without me ye can do what? Nothing. That's not just
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  true at the church house, friends. That's true at your house. He who made
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  us unique, he alone can cause us to fulfill our divine purpose.
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  So we have to find our place, and we have to remember that principle.
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  And then out of that, we have to work on the practical.
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  Now, the last time we studied this passage and discussed this,
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  this spiritual truth, I challenged you to meditate on it a little bit. To consider
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  what change needs to be made. What do you need to do?
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  What needs to grow out of this for you? You see, the whole passage in
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  1 Corinthians 11 is deeply practical. It's full of application.
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  Let me share just a few practical things God's been impressing on me lately related
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  to my own marriage and my own home life and homework.
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  One is don't compare your marriage with someone else's marriage.
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  Maybe you've been guilty of doing that lately. Looking at another marriage.
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  A friend, their marriage is not yours. Yours is not theirs. God gave you your
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  spouse. God is building your home. Let the
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  Lord be personal with you. Something else that has really
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  come home to me lately is to turn the noise off. So much noise in
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  our world from the television, from the radio, from the telephone.
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  Turn the noise off and have a meaningful conversation.
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  I'll tell you, we've lost the days of fireside
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  families. You remember the old house situation where instead
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  of being gathered around a television, they were gathered around a fireplace and they could
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  talk together. Now everybody's in different rooms on their own devices, living in their own
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  world. I want to encourage you, turn the noise off, have a conversation
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  today. A part of that— God is teaching me to listen
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  more. Listen to what your spouse is actually saying,
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  not just the fact they're talking, but heart-level communication.
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  What are they saying? What are their needs? Something else God
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  has spoken to me about lately is not trying to fix every problem.
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  I'll confess it, I'm a fixer. I like to fix things.
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  Doesn't mean I'm much of a handyman around the house, but in life
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  I like to— if I see a problem, let's try to straighten that out.
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  I think most men are that way. We're bottom-line kind of people. And sometimes
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  husbands say, well, there's a problem here, let's have a 5-minute conversation,
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  we'll straighten it all out. No, it doesn't work that way. Sometimes you
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  just need to listen, to spend time together. You know,
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  you may keep pictures around the house. I have a picture in our home
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  that came from the early days when Tammy and I were first together. It's one
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  of my favorites, and I love to look at it. It brings back so many
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  pleasant memories of the early days of dating and then marriage.
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  But whether you keep pictures like that around you all the time or not,
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  you need to be growing in your marriage. Don't let your
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  marriage just be memories. Let your love mature beyond
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  where you have been. Don't, don't leave that. Don't lose that first love.
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  You don't substitute one for the other. You keep that early love, but you add
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  to it a maturity. I love my wife so much more today
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  than I ever have. I hope and believe she loves me much more than ever
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  because we're growing in that. These are all things God is
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  teaching me right now about how much I need her, that she
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  needs me, And we both need the Lord.
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  So I want to give you a homework assignment. You know, the danger of broadcasts
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  like this is you can listen to somebody like me drone on and on and
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  on, and it just becomes more information taken in.
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  I want to challenge you to do something with it today. I want to challenge
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  you to sit down with your partner— yes, that's right, your partner.
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  Remember, 2 are better than one— and have a conversation.
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  Talk about your marriage. Talk about where it has been,
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  where it is now, and where it needs to go. Don't talk
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  about what your partner needs to change. Start yourself. Talk about what you need to
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  adjust, some things God's speaking to you about. What can
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  we do? I think so often in marriage it's, it's I and you,
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  and it should be we and us. What can we work on together to make
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  this more what God desires for it to be? And then once you've
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  talked to one another, hold hands, bow your
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  head and hearts. If possible, bow your knees and talk
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  to God together. Pray together. My pastor said to me early on,
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  he said, you never truly fully know your spouse's heart until you
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  hear them pray, because prayer is heart-level communication
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  and people bare their hearts when they're talking to God. Pray with your
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  spouse today. Talk to God together. You pray,
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  let them pray. And by the grace of Almighty God,
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  let us all work on depending more on one another and
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  ultimately on the Lord. Don't expect your spouse
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  to meet every need. Only Jesus can do that. Don't expect your husband
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  or your wife to be perfect. But friend, remember, we have a perfect
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  Savior. I would have you know that the head of every man is Christ.
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  The head of the woman is the man, and the head of Christ is God.
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  Nevertheless, neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the
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  man in the Lord. For as the woman is of the man, even so is
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  the man also by the woman. But all things of God.
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  I want to tell you that the 3 of you— you,
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  your spouse, and your Lord— you can, by the grace
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  of God, move forward. All things that you need are of
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  God. God has everything you need today, every supply your
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  family needs. Every resource your marriage needs to become
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  what God always desired and designed for it to become.
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  May the grace of God be with you today. May the peace of the Lord
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  rule in your home, and may you seek by God's grace to work
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  on your family and have the marriage and have the family that God
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  wants you to have. God bless you,
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  friends. For more resources
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  for your marriage and family, visit us at etj.bible
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  and click on the Take the Next Step link, where you'll
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  find many Bible resources that will strengthen your marriage and
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  equip you to raise your children in the ways of the Lord.
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  We highly recommend Scott's book, New Testament Marriage.
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  In it, you'll discover timeless biblical principles from the husband
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  and wife team Aquila and Priscilla, and these principles are
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  very applicable to your marriage today. From all
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  of us at Enjoying the Journey, thanks for listening today. And until next
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  time, we pray that you will enjoy the journey.