Latest / ok storytime / I am meeting my EX's newborn... and I don't think his girlfriend is thrilled! -r/relationships | Reddit Stories | EP3075

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I am meeting my EX's newborn... and I don't think his girlfriend is thrilled! -r/relationships | Reddit Stories | EP3075 · ok storytime

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Keon.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: And this is Angie, your favorite OK Storytime hosts, and
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: we've got some great stories coming up.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: But before that, we have a quick two-minute break from
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: our sponsors that keep the show running.
• 0:11
  Speaker 3: I'm meeting my ex's newborn, and I don't think his
• 0:13
  Speaker 3: girlfriend is thrilled.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: Well, that makes sense. Hey, guys.
• 0:17
  Speaker 3: So a few years ago, when I, now 24 female,
• 0:20
  Speaker 3: was ages 20 to 21, I dated a man. Let's
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: call him Toby, 31 male, for a year and a half.
• 0:25
  Speaker 3: He was 29 to 30 during this time. It was
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: a serious relationship and we ended up breaking up reasonably
• 0:32
  Speaker 3: amicably because he was ready for a family marriage. And
• 0:36
  Speaker 3: at age 21, I wasn't and didn't foresee myself being
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: ready until my late 20s. Maybe he shouldn't have dated
• 0:42
  Speaker 3: a 20-year-old if he wanted someone ready for marriage.
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: Ooh, and that's the truth, brother.
• 0:48
  Speaker 3: I guess technically I ended it, but he didn't resist
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: and acknowledged it was the best course of action since
• 0:53
  Speaker 3: we saw different futures for the relationship. Anyways, we didn't
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: talk for a few months, Toby's request, plus his new
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: job took him out of state. As a coincidence, after college,
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: I moved to his state for work. We met for
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: dinner and caught up. He told me he had started
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: dating again. This is about a year after the breakup
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: at this point, and was seeing this girl who we
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: will call Toby.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: 25 female.
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: This made me happy because I was nervous he retained
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: feelings for me. And so I felt like we couldn't
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: really be friends. But this made me feel like it
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: truly was platonic and relaxed a lot. Anyway, we texted sporadically.
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: I'm talking like, hey, how's it going?
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: Like once a month. Over the course of this, I
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: found out he and Julie had broke up.
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 1:34
  Speaker 3: He ended it because he didn't see a future with her.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: He just can't see the future at all. He's not
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: an oracle. He's blind. I guess so.
• 1:45
  Speaker 3: I guess she also would get mad about his past relationships,
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: namely me and the girl he dated before me for
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: five years. Since they had broken up, I didn't consider
• 1:53
  Speaker 3: this a disrespectful conversation to have to Julie. By the way,
• 1:56
  Speaker 3: this comes from good luck, Charlotte. And if you want
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: to submit your own stories, go to the r slash
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: okay story time subreddit.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: I'm Sophia. I'm Savannah.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: I'm Keon.
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: don't have all the answers.
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: We only know what we'd do. So let us know
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: what you would do in the comments.
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: And Opie says. Anyway, then one day he suddenly dropped
• 2:13
  Speaker 3: off the face of the earth. I didn't try avidly
• 2:16
  Speaker 3: to get in touch with him. I figured either he
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: didn't want to talk or was busy or whatever. He
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: deleted his Facebook and Instagram, both, but his brother still
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: posted the occasional thing with him, so I knew he
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: hadn't passed away.
• 2:27
  Speaker 4: Oh, good.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: Something like that. I always think that.
• 2:29
  Speaker 3: Like eight months later, I got a text from him
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: announcing that he and Julie had just had.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: A baby who we'll call Luke. Ooh. Julie his ex? Lukey. Okay. Lukey.
• 2:42
  Speaker 3: I was and am thrilled for him. I know how
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: bad he's always wanted to be a dad. I guess
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: she found out she was pregnant a month after they
• 2:48
  Speaker 3: broke up.
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: Oh, dang.
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: And then got back together and she asked him not
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: to contact me during her pregnancy. It is pretty wild
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: that he's messaging his ex, especially when he knows Julie
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: is uncomfortable with that and like his relationship with his
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: exes in general.
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, this is a sticky situation.
• 3:11
  Speaker 3: He asked if he could tell me after the baby
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: was born, and she said yes, hence the text. He
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: mentioned that they're trying to make it work for the
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: baby's sake, but that it's been really hard. Yeah, he
• 3:20
  Speaker 3: said he didn't see a future with Julie, but now
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: he's stuck.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: With the future. Oh, now the future is in your future.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: The future's futuring. You made a future.
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: Look out, here he comes.
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: Not the happy family life I envisioned when I was
• 3:37
  Speaker 3: initially thrilled for him. But still, he loves Luke so much.
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: I suggested family counseling and he said he had suggested it,
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: but she was resistant. At this point, I just want
• 3:46
  Speaker 3: to mention that over the course of mine and Toby's relationship,
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: I got close to his family as he to mine.
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: His mom unexpectedly passed away and I helped him through
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: that as his mom's side of the family was really
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: far away. I don't intend to ever have a close
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: relationship or friendship with him. But I do care about
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: him a lot and his family, including a nephew whose
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: birth I was in the hospital for and helped teach
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: to walk.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 4:09
  Speaker 3: We were friends for two full years before anything romantic
• 4:12
  Speaker 3: transpired between us.
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: That is even worse. That means you're 18. Well, technically
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: that's of age.
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: He said you're of age. We're going to be friends
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: for two years. And then when you're 20, I'm going
• 4:26
  Speaker 3: to date you. Uh-oh, she can vote now.
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: Come get her. Come get her. She's a free woman.
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: She's about to go voting.
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: So I always felt like more of a friend than
• 4:39
  Speaker 3: a girlfriend, which in retrospect was a contributing factor to
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: me not wanting to marry him, probably. Anyway, Luke is
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: almost a year old now. Toby had mentioned a few
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: months ago that he wanted me to meet Luke. I
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: said I would absolutely love to, but that I didn't
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: want to step on any toes, so just let me
• 4:54
  Speaker 3: know when it's okay and I'm there. He said that, yeah,
• 4:57
  Speaker 3: Julie still brings me up in fights. He didn't elaborate,
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: so I don't know what that means exactly, but I
• 5:02
  Speaker 3: can get the gist of it. Sounds like it's not
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: okay for you to go visit Luke.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I don't really understand why you would need to.
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: If it's not going to be anything, you know, it's
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: not like you're pursuing each other trying to, like, mend
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: the relationship or anything. Also sounds like you don't even
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: really want to be friends with him either. Yeah, it's
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: kind of like, leave this in the past, you know? Yeah.
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: He's made a future. He's futurizing. Leave the past in
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: the past for the future.
• 5:30
  Speaker 3: I don't know exactly what you mean, but I agree.
• 5:32
  Speaker 3: He contacted me a few days ago saying he and
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: Julie are doing better and that Julie has agreed to
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: meet me, Luke and Toe, next weekend when they are
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: in the city. I absolutely do not want to F
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: this up. How could I communicate to Julie that I
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: don't want to steal her baby's father from her or
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: break up their family and that my feelings for Toby
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: are purely platonic? And I've been excited to meet Luke
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: the same way I'd be excited to meet any friend's baby.
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: I feel like point blank saying all of that would
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: be presumptuous and make it way worse. Is there anyone
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: who has been in Julie's situation that can tell me
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: what would make them feel more at ease? I was
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: thinking of bringing a present for Luke and like a
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: card addressed to both Julie and Toby, congratulating them on
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: one year of parenthood or something. Addressed to both to
• 6:12
  Speaker 3: acknowledge that I see them as a unit.
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: Or is that weird? I don't think that's weird.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: To OP, maybe. But to Julie, probably weird. I don't know.
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: See, I don't know. I wouldn't like that. If like... Yeah,
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: if I were... If this was my... partner's ex, who is...
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: I'd be like, okay, she's trying. Like, I would feel
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: less if she just... sent a gift to him and
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: the baby, I would address it to both of them.
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: I agree.
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: I think you just got to have that conversation with Julie.
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: Not like, I don't know.
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: Oh, I don't want to.
• 6:47
  Speaker 3: If I were Julie, I would not want to have
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: a conversation with my partner's ex.
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: No, I wouldn't either. And I wouldn't want her to
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: meet the baby either. Personally, I'd be like, if my.
• 6:56
  Speaker 3: Partner had an amicable relationship with an ex to the
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: point where... It made sense that they would meet the baby.
• 7:04
  Speaker 3: I think I would be most comfortable if they sent
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: that letter addressing both of us. And if they were
• 7:09
  Speaker 3: to meet the baby, I'd be like, okay, I want
• 7:11
  Speaker 3: me there at all times.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: I don't want you alone ever. Yeah.
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: Not that I don't trust my partner, but I feel
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: like that I understand why that would make Julie upset.
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: OP continues.
• 7:21
  Speaker 3: Again, note that my contact with Toby is limited to
• 7:24
  Speaker 3: a brief four to five text convo around once a
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: month where he asks me about work and I ask
• 7:29
  Speaker 3: him how his family is. And he sends me pics
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: of himself and Julie with Luke.
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry, but I don't understand if you're like, you're
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: really not a thing. Yeah. You're hardly friends. You text
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: one to five times a month. You're like, oh, you're right. Like,
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't really need to meet your kid.
• 7:46
  Speaker 3: Also, he is pretty introverted and doesn't have a ton
• 7:48
  Speaker 3: of friends in the state. So I don't find it
• 7:50
  Speaker 3: strange that he wants to maintain a friendship with me.
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: But maybe I'm wrong. And there is an update more
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: than two weeks later. But what do you guys think?
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: Do we go and send a letter just to both
• 8:01
  Speaker 3: of them or send a gift just to both of them?
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: Do we not go and kind of leave the past
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: in the past? That's two. I guess I would. I
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: wouldn't meet, but I would send a gift to be like, oh,
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: you know, address to both of them. Be like, congratulations.
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: Here's something for, you know. Baby Lukey.
• 8:17
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: Say, like, I'm so happy for you guys, for both
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: of you. I'm really happy for everyone involved in this situation,
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: except for me.
• 8:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: We do have an update. More than two weeks later, well,
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: most of you were right. Kind of. Right. About what?
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: What did everyone say? I already know I'm right.
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: I was following through with the plan to meet them.
• 8:38
  Speaker 3: On one hand, that probably made things worse, but on
• 8:41
  Speaker 3: the other hand, it was kind of a boat is
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: already sinking type situation, and you'll see why in a moment.
• 8:46
  Speaker 3: Two nights before we were supposed to meet, Toby texts
• 8:49
  Speaker 3: me saying Julie won't be coming after all. And that's
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: when I said, nor either will I.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: And that's like, oh, actually, I just remembered I can't
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: come either. Can't make it. Because I can only be
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: in the room with you and your ex.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: Exes only. You mean you and Julie, her partner. Oh,
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: I thought they weren't even together. No, they got back together.
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: Because of Luke. Yeah.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: That's why we've had this whole conversation, because Julie was coming.
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: I thought she was just calling... Okay. Yeah, so Julie
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: is uncomfortable.
• 9:19
  Speaker 3: Julie is uncomfortable about OP's relationship with Toby.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: Because they are currently trying to make their relationship work.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: Then, yeah.
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: I could meet him and Luke at his grandparents' house,
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: also in the city we're going to meet at. I responded,
• 9:33
  Speaker 3: are you sure? We could always take a rain check
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: and try again when Julie's free. Because up until that point,
• 9:38
  Speaker 3: I had really convinced myself that Julie also wanted to meet.
• 9:41
  Speaker 3: And so her suddenly dropping out really confirmed all your suspicions.
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: He just responded, nope, we're staying at my grandparents' the
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: next couple days anyway, come on by.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: So I did. Hope he's got no gut feelings. OP's like,
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: I don't know. Maybe this could be good for us.
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: Maybe everyone wants me there. Maybe Julie really wanted me
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: to see Luke alone. Yeah, like, literally, what would be
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: the point of going? Like, I don't have any connection
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: to this guy. I don't really care. Like, you know, yeah,
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: we're friends, I guess. But, like, I don't need to
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: meet your child. I guess.
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: Call me rude.
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: OP says, you were right. Julie really didn't.
• 10:17
  Speaker 3: Want to meet me. Three nights before we were supposed
• 10:20
  Speaker 3: to all meet, Toby woke up around 2 a.m. to
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: Julie getting a text. He said the number wasn't saved,
• 10:26
  Speaker 3: but it said, you up, babe? With no preceding conversation,
• 10:30
  Speaker 3: so he proceeded to snoop through the rest of her phone.
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: This is not where I thought this was going.
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: Facebook Messenger revealed it was her ex, Derek, and she'd
• 10:38
  Speaker 3: been texting him on and off for a few months,
• 10:40
  Speaker 3: usually when Toby was working. He works for a contractor
• 10:43
  Speaker 3: that sends him overseas for a few weeks at a time.
• 10:45
  Speaker 3: Then he's home for a few weeks. Not really anything
• 10:47
  Speaker 3: too incriminating, but calling each other babe and making references
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: to hanging out.
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: See you later. Does nine work, et cetera, but nothing
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: overly spicy.
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: He said he didn't feel sad at all, just disgusted,
• 10:59
  Speaker 3: got out of bed and began grabbing some clothes for
• 11:01
  Speaker 3: himself and stuff for the baby. Julie woke up, he
• 11:04
  Speaker 3: confronted her and they had this explosive fight where she
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: said she wouldn't have had to text X if he
• 11:10
  Speaker 3: wasn't still hung up on me, how he probably wanted
• 11:12
  Speaker 3: me to replace her as Luke's mom, et cetera. The
• 11:15
  Speaker 3: yelling woke baby up, so he went to go get
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: him and Julie followed him out, basically said there was
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: no way in heck Toby was leaving with Luke Luke
• 11:22
  Speaker 3: was hers, not his.
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: What were they going to do? Come stay with me?
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: And so forth. Toby said he told her that.
• 11:28
  Speaker 3: He and I were just friends, unlike her and Derek,
• 11:31
  Speaker 3: and that he and Luke were going to his grandparents
• 11:33
  Speaker 3: till she cooled off. I guess they argued all night
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: until it was time for Julie to go to work.
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: Toby told her when she got home, they'd both be
• 11:40
  Speaker 3: at the grandparents' house. Julie said she'd call the police
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: if he took Luke out of the house, and Toby said, try.
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: God, what a freaking mess this is.
• 11:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we're going to pause there because that is not
• 11:51
  Speaker 3: where I expected the story to go at all. I
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: really thought Toby was going to be the bad guy here.
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: Turns out it's Julie. Turns out everyone. I mean, I
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: don't even think OP is innocent, truthfully. I don't know.
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: Everyone's all over the freaking place in this story. What's
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: going on? It's Monday. It's Monday. We just had a
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: long weekend. It's Monday. Literally. What's going on here? Yeah,
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: that is pretty wild. This is a whole like another conflict.
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: Like this is a whole nother story now.
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: No, I know.
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: I was like, okay, we're about to find out that
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: Toby is in love with OP. And then it was like, nope, cheating, cheating. Yay.
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: So that was three nights prior to me meeting Toby
• 12:30
  Speaker 3: and Luke. And Julie hasn't contacted Toby once, although he
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: hasn't tried to contact her at all either.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: Guess she didn't call the cops. But she's alive because she's.
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: Been posting on social media unrelated to the drama, fortunately.
• 12:42
  Speaker 3: Why does Opie always jump to they're unalive? She did
• 12:46
  Speaker 3: that with Toby. She's like, he's still alive. Don't worry,
• 12:48
  Speaker 3: he's alive.
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: I wasn't thinking that.
• 12:51
  Speaker 3: In our conversation, Toby basically took responsibility for the fight
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: and told me that he never loved Julie and had
• 12:56
  Speaker 3: only been staying with her because she had made it
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: clear if they weren't together, she would fight for full
• 13:01
  Speaker 3: custody and would win since Toby's job does send him
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: overseas for weeks at a time, whereas she works part
• 13:07
  Speaker 3: time at a local place. He actually got teary eyed
• 13:10
  Speaker 3: at this point and said he couldn't imagine not coming
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: home to Luke every night when he was in town
• 13:14
  Speaker 3: and not being able to see him whenever he wanted.
• 13:16
  Speaker 3: I don't know the extent of their relationship before. I
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: guess I had assumed they were serious, but it turns
• 13:22
  Speaker 3: out they dated less than two months before he broke
• 13:24
  Speaker 3: up with her because he wasn't feeling it.
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: Which honestly, two months is around a.
• 13:28
  Speaker 3: Reasonable time to be like, hey, I'm not feeling a
• 13:31
  Speaker 3: romantic connection.
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah. True. You don't want to waste anyone's time if
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: you're not feeling it.
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: Perhaps this is a good time to say wear protection
• 13:40
  Speaker 3: until you are sure.
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: And this is brought to you by protection. Protection. This
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: is brought to you by Trojan. Use it. No, it's not. Sorry.
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: No free sponsors. But I will sponsor protection. Then a
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: couple weeks later when she told them she was pregnant.
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: She has to get back together, and he said okay.
• 13:55
  Speaker 3: He admitted to me he knows now it was a
• 13:57
  Speaker 3: huge mistake to agree to get back together with her
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: when he knew he didn't want to instead of just
• 14:02
  Speaker 3: trying to co-parent slash give support as the baby's father.
• 14:05
  Speaker 3: He told me they have never said I love you
• 14:07
  Speaker 3: over the course of their two years of involvement.
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: Zang.
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: And that he thought he'd grow to love her because
• 14:13
  Speaker 3: of Luke, but he only grew to resent her more
• 14:15
  Speaker 3: over time.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't think this was a very good setup
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: to begin with. I think very much you just kind of,
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: you know, he wanted a family, but he didn't really
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: think it through, and now you're stuck with the worst family. Yeah.
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: Maybe.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: I don't know. You know, you do you, but OP,
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: I still don't think you should be involved in any
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: of this. Yeah, this is, like, getting too complicated now.
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: It's too messy. It's too messy. If it's not simple
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: or easy and it gets too sticky.
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. It's already messy with two people. Yeah. Now
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: you added the baby. And you added the ex's ex.
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: And also, OP's just still in there. So there's like five,
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: six people involved now.
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah. What's going on?
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: Grandma's also in it.
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: I feel like Toby just likes to make things really stressful.
• 15:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree.
• 15:07
  Speaker 3: I think it's I don't know if I only had
• 15:10
  Speaker 3: an acquaintance type relationship with an ex to the point
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: where I literally texted them maybe four times a month.
• 15:16
  Speaker 3: And then they started getting me involved in their insane parenting.
• 15:21
  Speaker 3: Like I'd be out having custody of their child drama.
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: I'd be like, hey, let's step back. I don't actually
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: feel super comfortable with you involving me on this. So
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: I don't really want to do this anymore.
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: Bye.
• 15:34
  Speaker 3: Toby more like noby toby mcguire more like toby my buyer.
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: Oh thank you yeah that was good yeah i get
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: it what there's a little bit left.
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: He owns the house that he and julie live in
• 15:54
  Speaker 3: and pays the full mortgage but he said he obviously
• 15:57
  Speaker 3: isn't gonna punt her out because they're family Just that
• 15:59
  Speaker 3: he's now more sure than ever that they shouldn't be
• 16:01
  Speaker 3: together romantically. Because he didn't even feel jealous or sad
• 16:05
  Speaker 3: when he saw that she had been meeting up with Derek.
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: He just felt pissed and taken advantage of. He has
• 16:09
  Speaker 3: another week of leave and is planning on staying in
• 16:11
  Speaker 3: his grandparents with Luke until then. It was super awkward
• 16:14
  Speaker 3: for me to listen to.
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: Him talk about. Yeah. I was over there about two
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: hours and then left. Oh, this was all in person.
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: You're all right. I shouldn't have agreed to meet them.
• 16:23
  Speaker 3: I can't help but feeling that their breakup was coming anyway.
• 16:26
  Speaker 3: But my involvement definitely accelerated it. I mean, I guess
• 16:29
  Speaker 3: that's good for him. That's the end of the.
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: Story, guys.
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: Oh, what?
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: That was it?
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: That's the end of the story.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: Well, I hope, OP, you.
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: Stay far away from that. I hope that never crosses you.
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: I hope you've learned a lesson. Yeah, I hope you
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: have gone home and really thought about all this and said, hmm,
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: who do I want in my life? And I hope
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: that Toby does not come to mind.
• 16:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: Because he's got his own things. He's got his own things.
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: You don't need to be involved with it. You don't
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: need a kid. You don't need to deal with baby drama.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: Bye. You're 21. No, wait, no, sorry. I hope he's
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: 24 now. But you were very young. And that's the
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: end of the story. We're going to go on to
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: the next one. My ex-girlfriend dumped me because of my past.
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: Now she came crawling back and you can crawl right
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: back out. My ex-girlfriend, I'll call her Emily, and I
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: first started dating in 2010. Not long after meeting at
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: university through some mutual friends. It was around the beginning
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: of the fall semester. I was 22, senior, and she
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: was 20, sophomore. Although I never joined a fraternity or
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: sports team, I made a lot of friends and they
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: always let me sleep at their places after parties. I
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: think that's so funny to be like, although I didn't
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: do these two things, the only way you can make friends,
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: somehow I still managed. I also did not join any
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: of that. Nor did I. Still had friends. Nor did I.
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: Look at us.
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: Actually, I was going to sororities and just eating a
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: bunch of food. It was great.
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: I made a lot of friends and they always let
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: me sleep at their places after parties. So I was
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: fairly successful with girls there and didn't really have any
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: relationships throughout college. I work out five days a week
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: and have been told that I have an 8, 9
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: out of 10 face. Who told you that? I met
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: Emily at a bonfire celebrating my friend's return from overseas.
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: And she was the first girl that I really wanted
• 18:16
  Speaker 2: to spend more time with. She was very well-spoken and insightful.
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: And although she was far from the most attractive girl
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: I'd pursued, she was still pretty cute. That's horrible. Never
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: tell her that. You need to take a step down, bud.
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: Your ego is a little too high.
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: Again, this is coming from a guy with an 8
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: to 9 out of 10 face.
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he's got an 8 to 9 ego. So he
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: can basically do whatever he wants. He can do whatever
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: he wants. So I quickly got her number. We hung
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: out two or three times each week, but she was
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: always kind of resistant every time I tried to make
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: a move. Normally, I would have just given up, but
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: she kept showing me more and more interest as time
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: went by, but she held her ground. Also, I wasn't
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: having spicy sleep with any other girls at this time,
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: but I really didn't mind because I just enjoyed chilling
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: out with her. Well, that's good.
• 19:06
  Speaker 3: I am confused by his claim of She was getting
• 19:10
  Speaker 3: more and more interested with me, but also not receptive
• 19:14
  Speaker 3: to any physical moves he made.
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah. That's confusing to me. Talking, cooking, watching films, and whatnot.
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: After maybe a month or so of chasing her, we
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: got a little more wasted than usual at a gathering,
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: and I told her that she could stay at my
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: house since neither of us could drive, and her apartment
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: was on the other side of campus. Hmm, well, it
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: seems you have your own place. Why are you sleeping
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: at all these sororities? Yeah, why are you sleeping at
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: all the fraternity houses? We fooled around for a bit,
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: but didn't do anything until the next morning. And the
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: spicy sleep was amazing! Wow. Wow. Okay, well, honestly, good
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: that you did it.
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: That was consensual, right?
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: Yes, that's what I was saying. Yeah, they waited until
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: they were no longer wasted. And then they were like,
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: all right, consent. Consent. Consent's cool, right? Yeah. Always.
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: That's what the kids are calling it these days, right?
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: Consent, protection, cool. Cool. Probably just because she was the
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: first girl that I've ever really liked, because I could
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: tell that she was inexperienced. But the next few months
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: were filled with the most consistently great and enthusiastic spicy
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: sleep that I've had to this day. Enthusiastic consent. Very good.
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from throwaway account 666. And
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: if you want to submit your own stories, go to
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: the r slash okay story time subreddit. I'm Savannah. I'm Sophia.
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: I'm Keon.
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: And we are here to give some good advice goofily,
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: but we don't have all your answers. We only tell
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: you what we would do, but let us know what
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: you would do down in the comments. As Opie says,
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: Emily was never as outgoing as I was, but she
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: usually tagged along at parties with my friends and I,
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: and she eventually started bringing her own group of friends, too.
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: I wasn't going out as often because of the time
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: I was spending with her, and I usually went to
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: parties to meet girls. While you were seeing her?
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: No.
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: Okay. But I obviously still made an effort to see
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: my friends, and she got along really well with them.
• 21:02
  Speaker 2: We planned on visiting each other over winter break because
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: each of our families wanted to meet, but we weren't
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: able to. Six-hour drive from one house to the other.
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: Wait, wait, wait, wait. But you guys made it official.
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: That's what is unclear to me. I'm kind of thinking.
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: Our families want to meet.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but he hasn't said, like, she's my girlfriend yet.
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: We have skimmed over that.
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Let's see if we'll get consent. We're skipping steps here.
• 21:27
  Speaker 2: But we stayed in touch, and in less than a
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: month's time, things were back to normal. Shortly after getting back,
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: my roommates threw a party at our house for the
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: beginning of the spring semester that got much larger than anticipated.
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: It was going well, but a lot of girls that
• 21:40
  Speaker 2: I had been involved with over the past three years
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: were there, and I guess one of them said something,
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: or Emily could just tell something was up. Two particular
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: girls were being extra flirty with me, even though I
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: was rejecting them, but still staying friendly. The next morning,
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: she asked about them, and I told her the truth.
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: that they were just two girls who I was having
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: spicy sleep with last winter, which I could tell was
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: at least bothering her a little. So I asked if
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: she had any ex-boyfriends to kind of even it out.
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: She said she dated three other guys besides me and
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: had spicy sleep with only two of them. So when
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: she asked about my spicy-related history, I hesitated a little
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: but told her the truth again, which was around 30.
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: I always wore a wiener wrapper. Protection. And I got
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: tested before meeting her. Nice. Honestly, good on you, OP.
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: Those are excellent things to do. Yes. Everyone should do that.
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: Spicy health, people. We like that. But she started choking
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: on her words a bit and started to cry.
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: But when I tried to hold onto her, she just
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: left and said, I'm sorry, I have to go without
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: looking at me. Oh, okay. She didn't respond to my calls,
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: so I stupidly decided to visit her apartment the next
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: day after one too many drinks. And her roommate came
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: out and told me that her last boyfriend was also
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: pretty gifted with women and cheated on her multiple times,
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: and she only found out afterwards. So that doesn't really
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: have anything to do with now. Yeah. Yeah, well, she
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: just doesn't want to repeat the same trauma. Girl, I
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: get it. But she got to work through that herself.
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: That's not an opiate.
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: I feel like she should have brought that up.
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: Earlier. Honestly, I don't... Not necessarily earlier.
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: She should have a conversation with him. Yeah, but it
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: feels like this is kind of the time that you
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: would have that conversation.
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: Exactly.
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: Like, it doesn't seem like they're fully official or maybe
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: became official recently.
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like you can't erase your past. Yeah.
• 23:24
  Speaker 3: I don't think anyone's done anything wrong, except I think
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: her reaction is a little bit overdramatic.
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: That's where I'm at. I stopped trying to contact her
• 23:32
  Speaker 2: and didn't hear anything back until about a week later.
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: And she came to my house with her roommate to
• 23:37
  Speaker 2: get her things and tell me that she couldn't trust
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: anyone who sleeps around that often. Hate that.
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: Don't like that.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah. That's something you gotta work through, girl. I tried
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: explaining that what happened before I met her was irrelevant,
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: but she had her mindset and I didn't want to argue,
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: so I let her go and didn't hear from her
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: until a couple days ago. That was back in 2011.
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: She called me and left a message while I was
• 23:59
  Speaker 2: at work saying that she'd like to meet up and
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: talk about us. Since our breakup, I had a few
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: small relationships here and there, but nothing longer than three
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: or four months. I've been working a fun job in
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: the same city I studied in, started learning to play guitar,
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: and stopped drinking as often. I think about her every
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: so often. Usually when I'd see her on Facebook, we
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: remained friends, yet haven't talked to one another. But a
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: few months after she ended things, I noticed her and
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: her new sorority friends posting far more pictures of them
• 24:28
  Speaker 2: at parties and bars getting wasted. Even some of her
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: kissing different guys. Also okay, as long as everyone's aware.
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: I don't want to assume she just slept with a
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: bunch of random guys because of me, but she seems
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: like a different girl than the one I dated in university.
• 24:43
  Speaker 2: All her statuses are pop song lyrics. She just seems...
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: To talk about drinking, raves, and crap with her friends,
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: and she's gained 10, maybe 15 pounds.
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: Okay. Okay, that's just college, okay?
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: No, there was no need to come for that. I
• 24:59
  Speaker 2: really think it's kind of none of your business.
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: Yep.
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: Basically, she seems like the girl that I would F
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: after college parties just to get laid. Well, that makes
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: you sound kind of like a D-bag. Hmm. At the
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: risk of sounding like a hypocrite, I kind of want
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: to give her a second chance, but now I'm the
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: one who doesn't know if I could trust her. What
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: do you guys recommend? I'm sorry, did she reach out
• 25:21
  Speaker 2: to you?
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: What did she say? Yeah, what did she say?
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: Well, there's an update here. Oh, oh boy, let's see.
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: Although I didn't plan on speaking with Emily again, she
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: gave me another call yesterday afternoon and I picked up,
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: not realizing it was her. She asked why I didn't
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: call her back and I just told her that I've
• 25:37
  Speaker 2: been busy with work. She still seemed pretty upbeat and
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: enthusiastic to talk with me and asked if she could
• 25:42
  Speaker 2: come along when I said I was going to grab
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: some food after work. I figured there wouldn't be any
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: harm in meeting over dinner, so I told her I'd
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: pick her up.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: Interesting.
• 25:51
  Speaker 3: We also don't even know if she wants to start
• 25:54
  Speaker 3: anything again. She might just want to apologize.
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: We'll see.
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: Let's see. She had a new place downtown. It was
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: pretty nice, especially considering the fact that she's waiting tables now,
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: hard to find work as a history major.
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: Oy.
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: I ended up leaving my car parked at her apartment complex,
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: and we walked about a mile to some Japanese place
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: she recommended. Hmm. She was never really talkative, but we
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: could always keep a conversation going for hours. This wasn't
• 26:19
  Speaker 2: exactly the case after we caught up on the what
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: have you been up to's. Her mouth was running, but
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: it didn't really go anywhere. This was the girl I
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: used to talk about philosophy and art with, and I
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: swear all she told me about for 30 minutes was
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: her sorority, how much work sucks, a couple ex-boyfriends, which
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: I have no interest in whatsoever, and parties. Anyway, we
• 26:40
  Speaker 2: got to the restaurant and I asked about a few
• 26:42
  Speaker 2: of her old hobbies because she was really good with
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: pastels and she was a decent pianist. But she laughed
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: and said she hasn't touched either in years. I've maintained
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: my hobbies and picked up some new ones and losing
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: hers wouldn't be a big deal breaker, but I liked
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: those things about her.
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: Oh. I think y'all changed. Lucy's changed.
• 27:00
  Speaker 3: You have changed and I think this is just a
• 27:03
  Speaker 3: person that you're no longer interested in.
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 27:04
  Speaker 2: And that's okay. It's like I... I played trombone for
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: like 15 years of my life. Yeah. And ever since
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: I graduated college, I have not picked it up. Yeah.
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: Because there's not really a reason for me to just
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: play that around the house. Yeah. So. I definitely don't
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: play the piano as much as I did.
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I would like to. It's just, yeah, I would
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: like to as well. But it's just, you know, people change. Yeah.
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: It's okay. Later, she asked how the love life's been.
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: But by then, I was just trying to leave because
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: she was making me cringe.
• 27:35
  Speaker 3: Oh, okay.
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: So I said, nothing special. I'm mainly focusing on furthering
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: myself in work. She said, so do you still go
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: after the party girls?
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: Oh, no.
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: She pulled a Sandy.
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: No.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: From Greece. She did a Greece. No. She said, I
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: have to change myself into what he wants. And I
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: gave her kind of a sympathy chuckle and replied if
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: they have anything to offer, which she must have liked
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: because she then said we should head back to her place.
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: But on the walk back, I made it clear that
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: I didn't have any romantic intentions with her. And that's
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: where things went south. Good. That is good to do.
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: Just being upfront and honest.
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: I appreciate that a piece of being honest. Conversation went
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: like this.
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: You guys ready? You want to be Emily, Sophia? Sure.
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: All right, here we go.
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: Why did you even bother meeting with me if you
• 28:21
  Speaker 2: aren't interested? Well, I figured I might as well give
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: you a chance and at least catch up.
• 28:26
  Speaker 3: I'm so grateful you gave me a chance.
• 28:29
  Speaker 2: So am I, but I'm not interested. Well, you were
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: interested in college. Exactly, and you weren't. You're different now,
• 28:36
  Speaker 2: and you'll probably be better off with someone else. But
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: I've been with other guys, and now I know I
• 28:40
  Speaker 2: want you. I didn't need to be with other girls
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: to know I liked you. Well, you had already been
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: with other girls.
• 28:46
  Speaker 3: You can't judge me for sleeping with other guys.
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: I'm not judging you for sleeping with other guys. I'm
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: judging you for leaving me to sleep with other guys.
• 28:54
  Speaker 4: Valid.
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: I couldn't trust you. then by your logic, I shouldn't
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: trust you now. Probably shouldn't have said that last line,
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: but I was getting aggravated.
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: Ooh. So I kind of called it. Yeah. Yeah.
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: No, she did. Oh, so she really tried to. Yeah.
• 29:10
  Speaker 3: It seems like OP just kind of wanted to casually
• 29:12
  Speaker 3: sleep with her. And that's why he met up with
• 29:14
  Speaker 3: her or maybe like wanted to give her a chance.
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah. He was like, maybe she's open-minded. Yeah, I was
• 29:19
  Speaker 2: open-minded being like, I don't know, she posts all this
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: stuff for me, she's still the same girl I really
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: liked back then, and now she's just completely changed into
• 29:25
  Speaker 2: someone that, you know, you don't really like anymore, and
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: that's fine.
• 29:29
  Speaker 3: Regardless of the somewhat judgmental comments he made, I don't
• 29:32
  Speaker 3: think that he's in the wrong for not wanting to
• 29:33
  Speaker 3: be with this girl.
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: I agree she's saying i changed for you yeah that's
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: weird which is very weird you mean you changed for
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: me you want to go sleep with other people for
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: me yeah it's like i.
• 29:43
  Speaker 2: Had to sleep with other people in order for us
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: to be together like for us to be like even
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: now I mean, I think there is a world where people,
• 29:53
  Speaker 2: I don't think it's untrue to say I wanted experience
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: to know the type of person that I wanted to
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: be with. Yeah. I think it's weird to.
• 30:01
  Speaker 3: Break up with someone to get that experience and then expect.
• 30:04
  Speaker 2: Them to want to be with you. Yes. Right on
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: the nose. You got that. From there, she started yelling
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: at me about being a hypocrite and things like her
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: learning better, which smelt of horse crap. So I calmed
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: her down, eventually got back to my car and left.
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: wishing her luck in life, but also making it clear
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: that she was not to contact me in the future.
• 30:25
  Speaker 2: It really sucked that she's so different, but if I
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: didn't meet up with her, then I guess I wouldn't
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: have known for sure. Well, we're almost at the end.
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: I mean, do you think he made the right choice?
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: I think he shouldn't have met up with her. I
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: think he should have because he needed to know that, okay,
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: so that was never going to be a thing. Yeah,
• 30:43
  Speaker 2: I guess to know. She's definitely changed from who she was,
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: which is not a bad thing. Everyone changes.
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: He was yearning for... Past her. Past her.
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: But now you passed her, didn't want him. So the
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: timing never really added well. I don't think that he
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: did anything wrong in how he went about it. I
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: think he was very truthful, even though sometimes the truth hurts.
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: But it's better to be truthful than to be sitting
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: there wondering. Yeah. What's going on? What should I be overthinking?
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: Should I have done it?
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Should I? Should have? Could have? Would have? Should have?
• 31:14
  Speaker 4: Could have?
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: Maybe the past is the past. Let's finish it up.
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: I can see where she was coming from in college.
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: I never cheated on her or plan to, but it's
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: far easier for people to trust themselves than others. The
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: girl that cheated on me was known to be very promiscuous,
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: like the girls I had spicy sleep with in college.
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: And even though I'm cool with that, I went against
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: my instincts and dated her anyway. She was alright as
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: a person, but I think I just felt like I
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: was supposed to start dating people at 25. I don't
• 31:43
  Speaker 2: think my standards are too high for a relationship, but
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: if I ever start wanting one, then nothing's stopping me
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: from giving it a try. I'm guessing I'm just kind
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: of worried that some girls won't trust me since I
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: like being a sleut winky face.
• 31:57
  Speaker 3: I think the right girl will not care about your
• 31:59
  Speaker 3: past as long as you were honest and up front
• 32:04
  Speaker 3: in your new relationships.
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's hard. Everyone's got a history. And don't have
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: much relationship experience. All that being said, one of the
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: first things I found myself attracted to in Emily, other
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: than her looks and personality, was her selectiveness slash innocence.
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: I know it's cheesy. Granted, she used to be a
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: really interesting person as well. So even if she was
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: easier than the other girls I've been with, I might
• 32:27
  Speaker 2: have pursued more than spicy sleep with her. Easier than
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: the other girls? Dude, I'm trying to be on your side.
• 32:35
  Speaker 2: You keep saying things that I don't like. Yeah, it
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: is really... But like I said in the last post,
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: if she wanted to get that out of her system
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: during our relationship, then I doubt it would have worked out. Still,
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: it didn't seem like she had any intention of doing
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: that until I revealed my number, so I just hope
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: it wasn't really my fault that she did all that.
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: Quit drawing and playing piano too, but maybe her new
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: personality would lead her into a better relationship? Thoughts? I
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: don't know. I mean, everyone... There's always, I feel like,
• 33:04
  Speaker 2: something for someone.
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: You know, so... Is that someone?
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: I don't think... I hope you don't blame yourself, OP,
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: for the way that she has grown. I think, like,
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: she had a choice in her life. She chose to
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: do that. She chose to make those decisions to, you know,
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: go out and be a party girl, sorority girl type
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: of person. You know, like, people just do that. And
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: that's cool. That's for them. It's not for other people.
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: I would never do it. But, like, I don't diss
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: people who do it. Like, sure, do it. I know...
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: so many like cute girls that are in like their little, like, Ooh,
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: like little whatever's. And like, they, it looks like they
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: have a lot of fun and like good for them.
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: I just, I just never did it. Um, but yeah,
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: I mean, I don't, I don't think you need to,
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: you know, yeah, you can reminisce, you know, past her,
• 33:50
  Speaker 2: but you know, she's a different person now. And so
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: are you leave the past in the past. Yeah. Leave
• 33:55
  Speaker 2: the past in the past and, you know, start doing
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: you and something will come up. Yeah. I agree. And
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: that's the end of the story. We're going to go
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: on to the next one.
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: Hey, it's Keon, your host with the cakes here. We're
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: going to get back to the stories, but here's three
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: minutes of ads from our sponsors.
• 34:11
  Speaker 3: I racked up debt to support my boyfriend, but he's
• 34:13
  Speaker 3: not making an effort to pay me back.
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: Where's my money?
• 34:18
  Speaker 3: I'm 25 female, a full-time student and small business owner,
• 34:22
  Speaker 3: and I've managed to rack up some credit card debt.
• 34:24
  Speaker 3: It's not an insane amount, but it still hangs over
• 34:26
  Speaker 3: me every day and brings me a lot of stress.
• 34:29
  Speaker 3: I got myself into this debt because I was supporting
• 34:31
  Speaker 3: both myself and my boyfriend, 23 male, for about six months.
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: Oof.
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: We've been together for just over a year. Wait, how
• 34:38
  Speaker 2: old is he?
• 34:39
  Speaker 3: He's 23, she's 25. He agreed to pay me back
• 34:42
  Speaker 3: when he got a job. He's been working for four
• 34:44
  Speaker 3: months now and has paid back a little bit of
• 34:46
  Speaker 3: the money, but then doesn't have enough to fund himself
• 34:49
  Speaker 3: until the end of the month. I still find myself
• 34:51
  Speaker 3: needing to help him out financially. The debt on my
• 34:53
  Speaker 3: credit card just keeps on increasing. I'm not really sure
• 34:56
  Speaker 3: what to do. It's debt in my name, so it's
• 34:59
  Speaker 3: technically mine. But as per the agreement with my boyfriend,
• 35:02
  Speaker 3: he's the one that needs to pay it off. Can
• 35:04
  Speaker 3: anyone offer up some solutions or insights into this issue?
• 35:08
  Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from Maximus Capacity. And if
• 35:11
  Speaker 3: you want to submit your own stories, go to the
• 35:12
  Speaker 3: r slash okay story time subreddit.
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: I'm Sophia. I'm Savannah.
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: I'm Keon.
• 35:16
  Speaker 3: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we
• 35:18
  Speaker 3: don't have all the answers. We only know what we'd do.
• 35:20
  Speaker 3: So let us know what you would do in the comments.
• 35:22
  Speaker 3: And OP says, Oh, we're at an update. Thank you
• 35:24
  Speaker 3: to everyone who commented on my last post and provided
• 35:27
  Speaker 3: some clarity. I feel pretty broken right now, but I
• 35:30
  Speaker 3: know I'll be okay.
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: Wow. What?
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: I mean, you know, we are going to pause. Wait.
• 35:34
  Speaker 3: Before we get into why OP is broken, just some advice.
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: We just got.
• 35:39
  Speaker 2: To the beginning and now it's all of a sudden, yeah.
• 35:42
  Speaker 3: If you don't have the money to pay for someone else,
• 35:45
  Speaker 3: don't pay for someone else.
• 35:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, don't put yourself in that situation. I know you
• 35:49
  Speaker 2: want to help people and all. I'm the same way.
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: Don't set yourself on fire.
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: I want to help people, but.
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: Also, yeah, don't. What is it? Set yourself on fire
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: to warm others.
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah that's the one.
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: I never heard that one don't do it i thought
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: i was like something about like i don't know giving
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: a body part to someone i don't know close don't
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: buy the hands no don't buy the hair don't give
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: them an arm and a leg don't maybe i don't
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: know i don't know it's been an incredible year of
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: growth and transformation and i'm telling myself this was a
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: necessary step to continue my journey to a better life.
• 36:20
  Speaker 2: I haven't been single for a while, so I'm really
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: terrified of being alone. I did get my money back. Oh, good.
• 36:26
  Speaker 3: I asked him to take it alone in his name
• 36:28
  Speaker 3: and transfer the money to me. I did this first
• 36:31
  Speaker 3: and most importantly to get my money back, but I
• 36:33
  Speaker 3: also wanted to see how he would approach the debt
• 36:36
  Speaker 3: if it officially belonged to him.
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: Hmm.
• 36:39
  Speaker 3: He was in the process of selling some things to
• 36:41
  Speaker 3: acquire the money to pay me back after my endless nagging.
• 36:44
  Speaker 3: But I do think the process sped up and became
• 36:47
  Speaker 3: more urgent. This said a lot to me about his
• 36:49
  Speaker 3: priorities and disrespect regarding my finances. The last straw was
• 36:53
  Speaker 3: that he took out a phone contract for an iPhone
• 36:56
  Speaker 3: 15 despite not having enough money to pay me back.
• 36:59
  Speaker 3: but rather spent the money on a new device yikes
• 37:02
  Speaker 3: he conveniently remembered that he had 40% of what he
• 37:05
  Speaker 3: owed me in a savings account that he is now
• 37:07
  Speaker 3: withdrawn and put towards his loan this was after we
• 37:10
  Speaker 3: had a conversation about a month ago about not putting
• 37:13
  Speaker 3: anything towards savings until my debt was paid off even
• 37:16
  Speaker 3: after this conversation I found out that he had put
• 37:18
  Speaker 3: some money away and was upset about it because of
• 37:21
  Speaker 3: our agreement I wasn't putting money into savings because of
• 37:24
  Speaker 3: this He then transferred that money to me. I asked
• 37:27
  Speaker 3: him a couple of days ago if he had any savings,
• 37:29
  Speaker 3: and he said no, only for this large sum of
• 37:31
  Speaker 3: money to be revealed. I think he genuinely didn't have
• 37:34
  Speaker 3: the thought to use this money to port towards my debt,
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: but that's the whole point. Lack of consideration. Leading up
• 37:40
  Speaker 3: to the breakup, and we do have confirmation there is
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: a breakup on the horizon.
• 37:45
  Speaker 2: Dang, I mean, what is happening?
• 37:47
  Speaker 3: It feels like he is just super inconsiderate and OP
• 37:51
  Speaker 3: realized at some point, oh, this guy who I'm paying
• 37:54
  Speaker 3: for is kind of.
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: A, you know.
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: I was trying to play dumb. He was like, that's
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: my savings money, not your money.
• 38:00
  Speaker 2: No, no, I wasn't supposed to give that to you, no.
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: But I also wanted a new phone and all these things. Yeah.
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: With my money.
• 38:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Truthfully, it's two people who are financially irresponsible trying
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: to be responsible. Yes.
• 38:14
  Speaker 3: It's OP paying for this guy when she doesn't.
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: Have the money to do it. When she didn't even
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: have it to begin with. And then she's already in debt.
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: Now she's in more debt. And then trying to figure
• 38:23
  Speaker 2: that out.
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: Nope.
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: Could not be me. Too freaking stressful.
• 38:28
  Speaker 3: Leading up to the breakup, I was thinking about what
• 38:30
  Speaker 3: things are relationship essentials for me. I realized that too
• 38:33
  Speaker 3: many of these boxes were unticked. The relationship was making
• 38:36
  Speaker 3: me feel neglected and disregarded. Like I'm too much and annoying.
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: Unsupported. Like I couldn't trust him. Betrayed.
• 38:44
  Speaker 3: And like there was a breakdown of communication. These are
• 38:47
  Speaker 3: all pillars of a good relationship for me. Oh, I
• 38:49
  Speaker 3: think maybe the opposite.
• 38:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I think they're just not... It's not
• 38:52
  Speaker 2: going to work out. I agree. And it stinks because maybe,
• 38:57
  Speaker 2: you know... even think it was gonna work in the
• 38:59
  Speaker 2: first place though like that's the thing like i'm trying
• 39:01
  Speaker 2: to think when was it good yeah because she's like
• 39:04
  Speaker 2: actually it's not even just the financial things it's actually
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: a lot of other things uh but financials was the
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: most part that was really stressful financials was just the
• 39:13
  Speaker 2: catalyst yeah realizing but yeah i agree with uh pink
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: pink punk some people are leeches My ex was always
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: short on rent, but always buying BS. Yeah. Some people
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: are like that. And that's why those people are in
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: those situations. Like, I wonder why. I'm like, how people
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: put these put themselves in this situation they just like
• 39:31
  Speaker 2: spend money that they don't have and i was like
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: that i mean but some people do that yeah some
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: people have that mentality of like oh i don't have
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: any money don't have any money but i need this
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: yeah like i have to buy this expensive item Yeah.
• 39:44
  Speaker 3: I mean, it's a thing that's taught. Parents will, you know,
• 39:47
  Speaker 3: model their financial spending habits to their children. And then
• 39:52
  Speaker 3: when that child, you know, is independent, they do the
• 39:56
  Speaker 3: same stuff.
• 39:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 39:57
  Speaker 3: Obviously, it's not, you know, this is not guaranteed. You
• 40:01
  Speaker 3: can break out of that habit or learned spending habit.
• 40:05
  Speaker 2: But it does happen a lot.
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: Teach your children good financial spending habits. Make them all
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: be tax people. Yeah. Make them all become accountants and
• 40:15
  Speaker 2: work at H & R Block. Yes.
• 40:18
  Speaker 3: I absolutely think that finances and taxes and stuff like
• 40:22
  Speaker 3: that should be taught in schools.
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: I freaking agree.
• 40:26
  Speaker 3: I think it's ridiculous that we were never taught how
• 40:27
  Speaker 3: to do that because some parents don't teach their children
• 40:29
  Speaker 3: how to do it.
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: I don't know how to do it.
• 40:31
  Speaker 4: I know.
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: I'm learning. We got a tax guy who does all
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: of our stuff. I mean, my parents are teaching me. Yeah.
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: But, um.
• 40:37
  Speaker 2: But it was never something that I was taught in school. See,
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: the thing is, whoever I'm going to be with later
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: on in life, they're going to have to know that.
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: And they will teach me. And I will be all
• 40:46
  Speaker 2: right with that. And there we go. I will not
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: be able to understand any of that. Even when I
• 40:51
  Speaker 2: try to understand it, even if I take a class
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: and get like a certificate, I won't know. What if
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: we put it in terms of you? Taxes for me.
• 40:58
  Speaker 2: You play all the parts. I am the tax girl.
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: What if you're the IRS? I am the IRS. Give
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: me all your money. But we got a little left.
• 41:07
  Speaker 3: I told him that I don't think he's ready for
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: a serious committed relationship, which means sharing your life with
• 41:11
  Speaker 3: another person. I told him to go live for himself
• 41:14
  Speaker 3: for a bit and experience not having to worry about
• 41:17
  Speaker 3: anyone else but him. He agreed that he needs to
• 41:19
  Speaker 3: go do some introspection and figure this out. He said
• 41:22
  Speaker 3: he's really mad at himself for ruining this, but he
• 41:25
  Speaker 3: understands where I'm coming from and hates that he's caused
• 41:27
  Speaker 3: me pain. He just pushed me to do this. He
• 41:30
  Speaker 3: said he thinks that I deserve the best in life,
• 41:32
  Speaker 3: and he's sorry he couldn't step up to be that
• 41:33
  Speaker 3: for me. I don't think he's a bad person, or
• 41:36
  Speaker 3: did any of this maliciously. I just don't think he's
• 41:38
  Speaker 3: ready to be part of my team. Right now, I
• 41:40
  Speaker 3: need to focus on myself and reach out for support.
• 41:43
  Speaker 3: Thanks for reading if you made it this far.
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: And that's it. Dang.
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: Jeff.
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: Awesome Ashley says, we had to suffer. Why shouldn't the
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: next generation suffer as well? Yeah, everyone should just be suffering.
• 41:52
  Speaker 2: Everyone should suffer. I agree. That's how you grow. That's
• 41:54
  Speaker 2: how everyone grows. Suffering. That's what they teach in Buddhism.
• 41:58
  Speaker 2: It's just, you gotta reach Nevada. And that's the end
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: of the story. We're gonna go on to the next one.
• 42:03
  Speaker 2: My friends swore they'd cherish my gift, then tried to
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: sell it right away.
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: Aw, how much was it?
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: I love antique items. I'm in an online group where
• 42:13
  Speaker 2: I'm close to other antique lovers, and one of my
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: friends online reached out to me to offer me a
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: well-sought-after item they decided to part with. They were only
• 42:22
  Speaker 2: giving it to me for free because we have a
• 42:25
  Speaker 2: close friendship online. It's a two-hour round trip, though, and
• 42:29
  Speaker 2: I didn't want to make the trip alone, so a
• 42:31
  Speaker 2: friend offered to go with me. I told them on
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: the way how excited I was to have the item.
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: When we arrived and my online friend brought out the item,
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: it was pretty, and my trip friend was in awe
• 42:42
  Speaker 2: and loved it. We loaded it in the car, they
• 42:46
  Speaker 2: asked me about it, and it was clear they had
• 42:48
  Speaker 2: no idea about it. But when I explained it and
• 42:50
  Speaker 2: showed how it all worked, they fell in love. By
• 42:54
  Speaker 2: the way, this comes from still wonky. And if you
• 42:56
  Speaker 2: want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash. Okay.
• 42:58
  Speaker 2: Storytime subreddit. I'm Savannah.
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: I'm Keon.
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: And we're here to give some good advice goofily, but
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: we do not have all of your answers. We'd only
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: tell you what we would do. Let us know what
• 43:07
  Speaker 2: you would do down the comments. As OP says, it
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: broke my heart a bit, but at the end of
• 43:13
  Speaker 2: the trip, I told them that since they were so
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: excited by it, even though I love it so much,
• 43:18
  Speaker 2: I would be willing to let them have it instead
• 43:21
  Speaker 2: since they have other antiques already. They happily took it home.
• 43:25
  Speaker 2: But that night, I received a text message in all
• 43:28
  Speaker 2: caps saying their friend told them to Google it and
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: they found out it's worth 1K. They said they are
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: super excited. They had planned to keep it, but they
• 43:36
  Speaker 2: want the money more. They couldn't wait to try to
• 43:39
  Speaker 2: sell it and had already posted it online. They said
• 43:42
  Speaker 2: they can get a bigger TV if they sell it.
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: I told them it was really rude to do that
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: when they knew I had my heart set on it
• 43:49
  Speaker 2: and I only gave it to them because they acted
• 43:51
  Speaker 2: as if they would cherish it. I actually am struggling
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: for money, so if anyone was going to sell it,
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: I could have. I knew the value. They said it's
• 44:00
  Speaker 2: not their fault because they didn't know it was worth
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: so much, and I can't blame them for selling it.
• 44:04
  Speaker 2: I'm livid, though. I told them if they aren't going
• 44:07
  Speaker 2: to keep it, they should have offered it back to me.
• 44:10
  Speaker 2: They say I'm way out of line. Am I the a-hole?
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: I mean, what they're doing is an a-hole thing, but
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: once you give something to someone and say it is yours,
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: I want you to cherish it, They can do whatever
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: they want with it.
• 44:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Obviously, she really liked it without knowing the value.
• 44:28
  Speaker 2: And so you thought, hey, you know, just a fellow
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: antiquer here trying to get ahead of the game and
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: buy something you like. And yeah, and then she ruined that.
• 44:40
  Speaker 2: And now she's like, wait, this thing is worth a
• 44:43
  Speaker 2: lot of money. Let me just sell it and get
• 44:45
  Speaker 2: all the money.
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: It's an a-hole move of the friend to do that.
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: 100%.
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: I don't think it's a whole of you to have
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: that reaction, because you thought that they liked it because
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: of what it was, not because of the money value.
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: 100%. It was going to be like, oh, you guys
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: cherish this, and you guys seem like you want it more,
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: and you weren't doing it for the money, but when
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: you found out, oh, how much it's worth? Yeah. Again,
• 45:12
  Speaker 1: a whole thing to do, but once you gave it
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: to them, personally... They can do whatever they want. They
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: can do whatever they want with it. Yeah.
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, there's no rules, so... Yeah, you can be pissed
• 45:22
  Speaker 2: at their decision, but.
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: At the end of the day, you should have never
• 45:26
  Speaker 1: given it to them. I know it was a nice
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: thing to do and be sentimental, and it should have
• 45:30
  Speaker 1: been like, oh, yeah, keep it.
• 45:31
  Speaker 3: Nah.
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: You can't control other people at the end of the day.
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: Truly. Also, if you have mind control, that'd be sick.
• 45:38
  Speaker 2: There's an update here. I have it back. Oh!
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: Did you buy it back?
• 45:44
  Speaker 2: No, my friend's mother brought it to me. She told
• 45:47
  Speaker 2: him he was in the wrong, but he was too
• 45:49
  Speaker 2: stubborn to take it back to me. So she and
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: her husband brought it to me. I doubt my friendship
• 45:55
  Speaker 2: is worth salvaging. A 40-year-old man shouldn't need his mom
• 45:59
  Speaker 2: to fix his problems. That is very true.
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: Was it really his problem, though?
• 46:04
  Speaker 3: What?
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: That's the thing. Was it really his problem to be
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: selling it? I think his mom fixed your problem, OP.
• 46:13
  Speaker 2: That's true.
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: His problem was, I want to sell this for money.
• 46:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so it didn't even fix his problem. It just
• 46:21
  Speaker 2: fixed yours.
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: I mean, again, he was doing a whole thing.
• 46:24
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: I'm very torn between this.
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: It's hard.
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: So, Savannah, say if you like something. Like, oh, you
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: like this necklace or you like my shirt. Oh, you
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: want it.
• 46:34
  Speaker 2: Great.
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: Have it. It is yours. I think you're going to
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: love it. I think you're going to enjoy it. And
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: then later on you go, I sold it or I
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: gave it to somebody else. And you're like, that's kind
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: of crappy. I gave that to you for you, but
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: it's yours. I gave it to you. Do whatever you
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: want with it.
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, see, I wouldn't do that. If someone, if I
• 46:53
  Speaker 2: was like, oh my gosh, I really like that, can
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: I have it? I wouldn't think to sell it and
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: get money for it. I would want it because I
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: want it. Exactly.
• 47:02
  Speaker 1: But, yeah.
• 47:04
  Speaker 2: They figured out the value later on and were like, well,
• 47:09
  Speaker 2: I could, you know, do I want this antique or
• 47:12
  Speaker 2: do I want a new TV?
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: Let us know in the comments because, again, we're both
• 47:17
  Speaker 1: very torn.
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 47:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: Once you give a gift to somebody or you give
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: something to somebody, you have no control over it and
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: how they use it or what they do with it.
• 47:25
  Speaker 2: Some people mentioned the friend who gave it to me.
• 47:27
  Speaker 2: They created a story in which my friend was upset
• 47:30
  Speaker 2: that I gave the item to someone else, that I
• 47:32
  Speaker 2: broke his heart, etc. I didn't touch on that in
• 47:36
  Speaker 2: the OP because it was such a non-issue. The issue
• 47:41
  Speaker 2: was between me and the other friend and dragging the
• 47:43
  Speaker 2: first friend into it and making him out to be
• 47:45
  Speaker 2: emotional about it in the story was frankly odd. He
• 47:49
  Speaker 2: was upset for me and joked about making the guy disappear.
• 47:53
  Speaker 2: He's not a sappy, hurt guy like someone tried to
• 47:55
  Speaker 2: portray him as. I used to send him things I
• 47:58
  Speaker 2: thought he'd like over the years, and he would also
• 48:01
  Speaker 2: get things constantly himself, but lately, for personal reasons, he's
• 48:05
  Speaker 2: put a full stop on acquiring more items. He's getting
• 48:08
  Speaker 2: rid of the clutter, what his wife calls it, which
• 48:11
  Speaker 2: makes his wife happy. I may have it back, but
• 48:14
  Speaker 2: the damage is done. I'm going to move on.
• 48:17
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 48:17
  Speaker 2: Well, I mean, if you think that that's what's best,
• 48:19
  Speaker 2: if you, like, don't trust that person and feel like
• 48:21
  Speaker 2: they just betrayed you by doing that, then, yeah, then
• 48:25
  Speaker 2: you don't need to have them in your life. But
• 48:26
  Speaker 2: if you feel like there is something salvageable in this relationship,
• 48:30
  Speaker 2: I would, you know, maybe have a talk with them
• 48:32
  Speaker 2: about it. But I don't know if that will be
• 48:35
  Speaker 2: for better or for worse.
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: Now, here's my real question. Is OP keeping that antique
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: that she gave the friend because, you know, she knew
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: how much it would cost.
• 48:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: But she also said, if anything, I need the money.
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: Do you think OP's going to sell it to get money?
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: Because she said, I'm in a financial hard place right now.
• 48:53
  Speaker 2: I don't think... I feel like OP... Well, I don't know.
• 48:57
  Speaker 2: There's not really a lot of context here.
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: I know. We're going off a lot with a little.
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: They are like an antique person. Like they, you know,
• 49:05
  Speaker 2: buy and sell, I would think. But I feel like she,
• 49:10
  Speaker 2: you know, OP was waiting for this. And so for
• 49:14
  Speaker 2: them to go out and get it, you know... I
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: don't know.
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: I'm intrigued. Let us know in the comments how you
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: feel about OP and how the situation unfolded. That is
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: the end of that story, though. Luckily, she got it back,
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: which is great. I wasn't expecting that.
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I wasn't expecting that either. I just thought, you know,
• 49:33
  Speaker 2: chalk up to a loss and be like, well, got
• 49:35
  Speaker 2: to move on. But now you can move on and
• 49:37
  Speaker 2: also get your antique. For $ 1, 000. So, who's the real
• 49:42
  Speaker 2: winner here? And that's the end of this story. We're
• 49:45
  Speaker 2: going to go on to the next one.
• 49:46
  Speaker 1: My friend gaslit me into paying for a trip, but
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: I can't even go.
• 49:50
  Speaker 2: Dude, where's my money?
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: So, me and nine other friends had planned on going
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: on a holiday together, and we booked an Airbnb, each
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: of us paying an equal part and sending it to
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: my close friend, 22 male, who was in charge of
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: arranging the holiday. I'm not a citizen of the country
• 50:05
  Speaker 1: I live in, and I had some problems with my
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: immigration status right before our holiday, which interfered with my
• 50:11
  Speaker 1: ability to leave the country. I made my friend aware
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: of this and apologized, but I assured him that I
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: would still pay for the stuff we had already booked.
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: I also said I knew some of our friends couldn't
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: come on the holiday since they couldn't afford it, so
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: they were welcome to come into my place and they
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: didn't have to pay me back. They just pay me
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: for a name change on my plane ticket. A few
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: days later, he messaged me to say the Airbnb that
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: we had booked had canceled on us and our money
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: was being refunded. I asked him if it would be
• 50:39
  Speaker 1: all right if he could send me the chunk of
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: money and pay me back, and their group could rebook
• 50:43
  Speaker 1: another Airbnb that would accommodate a smaller group. He said yes.
• 50:48
  Speaker 1: And by the way, this comes from user Wiley99. If
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: you want to submit your own stories, go to the
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: r slash OKStoryTime subreddit. I'm Keon.
• 50:55
  Speaker 2: And I'm Savannah.
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: And we're here to give good advice goofily. Look at us.
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: Or listen to us. We don't know everything. We only
• 51:03
  Speaker 1: know what we do. So let us know what you
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: do in the comments down below. Pretty please.
• 51:08
  Speaker 2: As OP says.
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: As Savannah says?
• 51:11
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: As OP says. So my friend texted me again a
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: while later, saying there were only expensive Airbnbs left, and
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: they needed my chunk of the money to help everyone
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: afford the more expensive place. Saying, sorry, we need the
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: money so I can't give it back. He also said
• 51:30
  Speaker 1: that I had bailed on everyone and left everyone in
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: a tight spot, so I had to do this. And
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: I was already okay with my money burning, so me
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: paying would be the lesser evil compared to making everyone
• 51:43
  Speaker 1: else pay more. I told him me bailing wasn't a
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: problem until he decided it was. That what he was
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: trying to do felt opportunistic, because he wouldn't have asked
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: me to resend him my money to pay for them,
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: if the money had been refunded to my account and
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: not his. I also looked up housing around the area
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: for myself and found many options that fit all of
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: our criteria. They were perfectly capable of booking a more
• 52:07
  Speaker 1: reasonable place that they could afford. I felt as though
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: he was trying to use me to help the group
• 52:13
  Speaker 1: afford a more luxurious place. The Airbnb he was now
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: trying to get was way over budget and was costing
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: about more than double what my lack of presence would
• 52:24
  Speaker 1: have been costing them if they got a place with
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: a similar price to the original one. I told him
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: I wasn't the reason for them being out of the house.
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: That was the Airbnb's fault and they were making it now...
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: My problem. I also couldn't have afforded the new place,
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: even if I did come so. Would they have expected
• 52:41
  Speaker 1: me to just pay my old part again? Just so
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: they could go on holiday without me? I told him
• 52:47
  Speaker 1: I felt disrespected, because he never even asked me if
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: I could help them pay, you know, as a favor
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: to a friend, or just a genuine ask for help,
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: because of course I would have. But he resorted to
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: treating me like a kid that he was lecturing. I
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: said the money wasn't a problem, but the entitlement was.
• 53:04
  Speaker 1: Everyone in our group said I was super unreasonable. Before
• 53:07
  Speaker 1: we keep going, Savannah.
• 53:09
  Speaker 2: No, I hate this guy.
• 53:09
  Speaker 1: I hate all these people.
• 53:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the fact that you're not even going on this vacation. Like,
• 53:15
  Speaker 2: you were willing to pay the chunk if they, you know,
• 53:17
  Speaker 2: they already booked in. It's like, well, whatever. I'll just
• 53:19
  Speaker 2: eat the money, whatever. But then they got refunded. So
• 53:24
  Speaker 2: you should be able to now take your money back.
• 53:28
  Speaker 2: And why would you pay for another place? Because originally
• 53:31
  Speaker 2: you were going to go on the vacation, but then
• 53:33
  Speaker 2: you couldn't. This one, you're just completely not. So why
• 53:36
  Speaker 2: would they just take your money and be like, you're
• 53:38
  Speaker 2: not coming, but like, we need that money. Like, that's
• 53:40
  Speaker 2: not your fault. Why do I have to pay for
• 53:42
  Speaker 2: you guys to go on vacation without me? Huh?
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I'm sending him options of Airbnb options with this,
• 53:49
  Speaker 1: you know, either the same price or a lower price. Yeah.
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: Like none of this is your fault. So why are
• 53:55
  Speaker 2: you getting like degraded like that? And also the friends.
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: Being like, yeah, he should pay. Screw you guys, you're
• 54:03
  Speaker 2: not my friends. What?
• 54:05
  Speaker 1: Upi continued saying 22 male later called me on the
• 54:07
  Speaker 1: phone and it ended up devolving into what essentially felt
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: like a humiliation ritual. It invited over some of our
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: friends prior to me calling. And the entire time, as
• 54:18
  Speaker 1: I was talking about how I felt wronged, our friends
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: in the background were giggling amongst each other, making weird
• 54:23
  Speaker 1: comments and doing little reactions after my every sentence. I'd
• 54:27
  Speaker 1: say I feel taken advantage of, And they laugh audibly
• 54:31
  Speaker 1: in the background and I go, I can't believe she
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: actually said that. The audacity, which really pushed me to
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: the edge. And I ended up telling everyone involved to
• 54:40
  Speaker 1: get their crap together and to stop acting like children
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: and hung up on their face. Honestly, the phone call
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: came as a shock because I've been friends with them
• 54:49
  Speaker 1: for six plus years and I hadn't realized they were
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: capable of what essentially felt like straight up bullying. He
• 54:56
  Speaker 1: later texted me and said he found some other option
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: and offered to pay me back to make amends. But
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: I told him I was done and to keep the
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: money and blocked him. Am I the a-hole?
• 55:06
  Speaker 2: I mean, that last part, yeah.
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: That last part, yeah. You made, okay. That last part,
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: you should have got your money.
• 55:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, what was the whole point? You don't want to
• 55:14
  Speaker 2: pay it. So why all of a sudden you're like,
• 55:16
  Speaker 2: you know, and I don't even care anymore. Just take it. Like, that's,
• 55:20
  Speaker 2: that's just, that ruins the entire argument.
• 55:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you ruin your entire argument there.
• 55:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you just argued with this guy for, like, days
• 55:26
  Speaker 2: and all of your friends over this, and now you're like,
• 55:28
  Speaker 2: you know what, never mind, keep it. Like, that's just
• 55:30
  Speaker 2: letting them win.
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: What?
• 55:32
  Speaker 2: What was the whole point of this?
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: So you mean to tell me you lost not just
• 55:35
  Speaker 1: your money, but also your friends?
• 55:37
  Speaker 2: When really, you could have only lost your friends.
• 55:40
  Speaker 1: And there is an edit here. For the people confused
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: about why I just let them have the money. For me,
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: it really wasn't about the money in the first place.
• 55:48
  Speaker 1: It's how I felt I was disrespected. I also told
• 55:51
  Speaker 1: them this numeral times. Money comes and goes. I'd rather
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: have the dang money if they'd need it that badly
• 55:58
  Speaker 1: than leave any space for them to paint me as,
• 56:00
  Speaker 1: you know, someone who's frugal.
• 56:01
  Speaker 2: But you're not frugal. This is a legitimate thing. Like,
• 56:05
  Speaker 2: I don't understand. Now you're just... I mean, it couldn't
• 56:09
  Speaker 2: be me. I'd be like, okay, yes, give me the money.
• 56:12
  Speaker 2: And now I won't talk to you guys. But instead,
• 56:14
  Speaker 2: you're like, you know what? Keep the money, and I
• 56:16
  Speaker 2: still won't talk to you guys. Why are you giving
• 56:19
  Speaker 2: them money for... For you feeling disrespected, you're going to
• 56:22
  Speaker 2: pay them to disrespect you? OP, it's not adding up.
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: I don't know, V.
• 56:27
  Speaker 2: That last part, now I lost respect for you on
• 56:31
  Speaker 2: that last part. Because it's like, I understand maybe you
• 56:34
  Speaker 2: just want to be done with it. I've argued too much, blah, blah, blah.
• 56:38
  Speaker 2: But if they're like, okay, no, we'll send you the money.
• 56:41
  Speaker 2: I'd be like, yeah, send me the money.
• 56:42
  Speaker 1: And I better have it in like an hour. And
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: then cut off contact. But you said, no. This entire
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: argument wasn't about the money. It was about me being disrespected.
• 56:50
  Speaker 1: Which I personally think stems back to the money. Yes.
• 56:54
  Speaker 2: Like the whole reason for this argument was because they
• 56:57
  Speaker 2: weren't paying you back. But now you're like, nope, this
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: is about disrespect now.
• 57:00
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 57:01
  Speaker 2: You're changing it.
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: I don't think you really I don't think you showed them.
• 57:05
  Speaker 1: But as long as you cut them off and you
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: don't have to deal with them anymore. Great.
• 57:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, at the end of the day, do
• 57:10
  Speaker 2: what you want. But I just I don't think that
• 57:12
  Speaker 2: was the best decision just to let them have the
• 57:14
  Speaker 2: money and then be done with them. It's your money.
• 57:17
  Speaker 1: The money being given back to me was being framed
• 57:19
  Speaker 1: as him making amends to me and making things right.
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: But nothing about any of this was right, so I
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: didn't want to make him feel validated in having made
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: his amends. There were also stuff said along the lines of,
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: some people won't be able to afford the holiday without it.
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: And not everyone involved were a-holes, just spineless. And as
• 57:39
  Speaker 1: much as I don't want them to be my friends,
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: I also don't want to even slightly be responsible for
• 57:43
  Speaker 1: ruining their holiday, whether it's warranted or not. Most of
• 57:47
  Speaker 1: my family and really close friends have also said I
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: should have just taken the money. It's definitely my ego
• 57:52
  Speaker 1: or pride speaking, but I'd rather have my peace of
• 57:54
  Speaker 1: mind than anything else. This was a quick out. I
• 57:58
  Speaker 1: had no energy left to try and further arrange or
• 58:00
  Speaker 1: chase my refund. I just wanted to cut ties immediately. OP,
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: he literally said, I'll just give you the money.
• 58:07
  Speaker 2: And you went, nope, you're disrespecting me. Ah, okay.
• 58:11
  Speaker 1: My job isn't to teach them a lesson. I'm sure
• 58:14
  Speaker 1: someone along the way will do that for them. And
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: that's the end of that story. You pissed me off, OP.
• 58:19
  Speaker 2: It's not even like teaching them a lesson. Like, I mean,
• 58:22
  Speaker 2: but that's kind of what you wanted to do, though,
• 58:24
  Speaker 2: because you're saying you disrespected me. I want you to
• 58:26
  Speaker 2: know that you disrespected me. And so I'm going to
• 58:28
  Speaker 2: block you and not talk to you, blah, blah, blah.
• 58:30
  Speaker 2: But by the way, you can keep my money.
• 58:32
  Speaker 1: I will get some comments on this one. I'm sorry.
• 58:34
  Speaker 1: I have to look at comments on this one just
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: to see, like, OP make it make sense.
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just like I'm still I still don't think
• 58:39
  Speaker 2: you're the a-hole here. But how you are handling it
• 58:42
  Speaker 2: is just kind of bewildering me.
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: I know you're like, yeah, I'm reading some of the
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: comments here. To be honest, you should have just taken
• 58:50
  Speaker 1: the money and then not come back. The call is
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: the breaking point. They didn't want to hear you out
• 58:54
  Speaker 1: or really talk to you, but make a circus show
• 58:57
  Speaker 1: out of your emotional vulnerability. And I think you're correct.
• 59:01
  Speaker 1: They wanted to have luxury at your expense, not the a-hole.
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: And someone else says, yeah, you should have just taken
• 59:06
  Speaker 1: the money and then blocked them. I don't think you're
• 59:08
  Speaker 1: going to teach them a lesson with any of this.
• 59:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no. They're not going to learn. They're just going
• 59:13
  Speaker 2: to be like, oh, sweet, we got the money. All right, guys,
• 59:15
  Speaker 2: let's go. I mean, I know you're not trying to
• 59:17
  Speaker 2: teach them a lesson, but I don't know. Just get
• 59:20
  Speaker 2: your money back.
• 59:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what?
• 59:22
  Speaker 2: Apparently that's not what you want.
• 59:23
  Speaker 1: It's too late now. Let them enjoy the thing. Don't
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: deal with them anymore. Get friends who actually will treat
• 59:28
  Speaker 1: you with respect. Easy as that.
• 59:31
  Speaker 2: And that's the end of this story. We're going to
• 59:32
  Speaker 2: go on to the next one. Hey, it's Angie, your
• 59:35
  Speaker 2: favorite fake redhead host here, and we're going to get
• 59:39
  Speaker 2: back to the stories, but here's a three-minute ad break
• 59:42
  Speaker 2: from our sponsors.
• 59:44
  Speaker 1: My friends turned against me over a simple game night.
• 59:47
  Speaker 2: Was it Uno?
• 59:48
  Speaker 1: Because then I understand. I, 16 male, went to a
• 59:51
  Speaker 1: game night with people from work. I almost didn't go
• 59:53
  Speaker 1: because I had a headache and I wasn't feeling well,
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: but I decided to go anyway. I arrived about an
• 59:59
  Speaker 1: hour late.
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 2: Later.
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: more people showed up. Eventually, there were around 10 of us.
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: One of the games we wanted to play was Werewolves,
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 1: similar to Mafia. I see you. Love this game.
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 2: I used to play Mafia all the time when I
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 2: was younger. I haven't played it in so long.
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 1: And to those younger than us, like among us.
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, basically, yeah. It's like, yeah, it is. I never
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 2: made that connection.
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 1: Opie continued saying, I had brought the game because everyone
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 1: was supposed to bring one. While I was setting it
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: up and getting ready to explain the rules... A coworker,
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 1: let's call him Jake, 17 male, suddenly announced that he
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 1: was going to host. I told him no, because it
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 1: was my game, and I thought it was already agreed
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: that I would host. Several people then told me that
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 1: they had apparently voted for Jake to host.
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 2: Okay. I would just let him host.
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 1: I honestly didn't even know there had been a vote,
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 1: which means things escalated fast. By the way, this comes
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 1: from user AcceptableGarden23. And if you want to submit your
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 1: own stories, go to the r slash OKStoryTime subreddit. I'm Kion.
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 2: And I'm Savannah.
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 1: And we're here to give good advice goofily. Look at Savannah.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: Look at me. We don't know everything. We only know
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 1: what we do. So let us know what you do
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 1: in the comments down below, pretty please. As Opie says,
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 1: Jake started shouting at me. This solves things real fast.
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 1: Another coworker, Ryan, 17 male, who I've had issues with before,
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 1: also started yelling and saying it was just a game.
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 1: While this was happening, my friend Emma, 18 female, started
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: talking to another friend, Sophie, 16 female, right next to me.
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: Emma was saying things like, he always does this, and
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: calling me childish while I was sitting there listening.
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 2: Oh, so none of these people are your friends?
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: Eventually, I snapped and told her to shut the F
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 1: up and sit down.
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 2: You don't say that to a girl. I don't care
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 2: if they're your friend. You don't say that.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 1: Hey, Savannah. Aw. Shut the F up and sit down.
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 2: I'd be like, wow.
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 1: I'd be like, no, you know what you should say?
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 1: Be like, hey, dummy, I'm sitting down already.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 2: Hey, you idiot.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 1: Hey, idiot, use your eyes.
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 2: Look where my butt is.
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 2: You see? I'm sitting.
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 1: After that, everything just got worse. Ryan stormed out and
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 1: slammed the door. The room went quiet and awkward. Someone
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 1: suggested I go for a walk, so I went outside.
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 1: Once I was outside, I started tearing up because I
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 1: felt overwhelmed and guilty for what I said. I genuinely
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 1: felt bad about it. Later, Emma came outside and said
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 1: she didn't expect things to escalate that much. I apologized
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: to her for what I said. She accepted that I
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 1: felt bad, but also said she wasn't going to apologize
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 1: for the things she said about me because she didn't
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 1: regret saying them. What hurt even more was that she
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 1: later told someone that she had actually felt that way
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 1: about me for a while. At that point, I wanted
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 1: to go home. But Sophie, who was trying to stay neutral,
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 1: told me not to leave angry. So I stayed. When
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 1: I came back inside, everyone was acting normal again. I
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 1: was still shaking from the adrenaline, but I kept that
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 1: to myself. Later, we were making teams for another game,
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 1: and I got paired with Ryan. He immediately refused and
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: left the event entirely.
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 2: Dang, he didn't just say, no, I'm not playing. He said,
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 2: you know what? I'm out of here. You put me
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 2: with Opie. I spit on him.
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: This game night sucks. After that, people started doing karaoke.
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 1: And surprisingly, the rest of the night was mostly normal.
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 1: And even fun. On the way home, I saw Emma
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 1: and Sophie talking again. But I couldn't hear them. Later,
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 1: Sophie told me that Emma was still angry because she
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: thought it was disrespectful and unprofessional that I swore at
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 1: her at a work event. I understand that perspective. But
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 1: I also feel like people are ignoring the fact that
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 1: I was being shouted at, insulted, and talked about while
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 1: sitting right there. I know telling someone to shut the
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 1: F up wasn't the right thing to do, and I
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: already apologized for it. But I don't feel like I'm
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 1: the only person who handled the situation badly. Am I
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 1: the a-hole? I think everyone sucks here.
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'd have to say everyone sucks here as well.
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 2: I mean, I do think that you're the a-hole for
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 2: saying that. I think you could have been like, hey,
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 2: we'll handle it, you know?
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 1: But I feel like, again, in the moment, OP, picture this,
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 1: picture this. You're sitting down, you were expecting to play
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 1: the game that you brought, and you were excited to
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 1: show off this game and explain the rules, being shouted
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 1: at by not one, but two people, and then someone,
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 1: your friend at work, says, yeah, he does this all
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 1: the time. Like, I can't believe him. OP's probably going like,
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 1: What is happening?
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I.
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 1: What he said was wrong. 100%. But why is everyone yelling?
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 1: Why did he get to this point? Have you done
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 1: this before in the past, OP? If Sophie did say that. Or, sorry,
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 1: Emma said that. Or whoever.
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 2: Also, just given the circumstances of where you were, you
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 2: literally were backed into a corner and everyone was coming
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 2: at you in every single direction. So it's like, okay,
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 2: what do you want? I'd probably freak out too.
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 4: So.
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 2: I'll give you grace on that.
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 1: I just think everyone sucks here. Yeah, I also think
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 1: everyone does. And there's an edit and or clarification here.
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 1: A lot of people are asking the same questions, so
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: I wanted to clarify a few things. This was not
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 1: a formal work event or a work shift. It was
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 1: a casual game night at our office. I work for
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 1: a neighborhood platform, and most of us are either friends
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 1: from school, friends outside of work, or became friends through
• 1:05:31
  Speaker 1: the team. We are coworkers, but we're also sort of
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 1: a friend group. Being late wasn't unusual. I arrived about
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 1: an hour late, but I wasn't the last person there.
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 1: Almost everyone arrived late except the host. I genuinely didn't
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 1: know there had been a vote about who would host werewolves.
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 1: If I had known, I wouldn't have been surprised that
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 1: someone else was chosen. My issue wasn't really about hosting
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 1: the game. What upset me was that as soon as
• 1:05:57
  Speaker 1: I questioned it, multiple people started shouting at me. While
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 1: that was happening, Emma started talking about me to Sophie
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 1: while I was sitting, again, right there, saying things like,
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 1: he always does this, and calling me childish. I didn't
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 1: immediately tell Emma to shut the F up. I first
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 1: asked her to stop. She continued talking about me, and
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 1: that's when I snapped.
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know if this is going
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 2: to go over well, but I don't know. I kind
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 2: of think you're... a.
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 4: Little dramatic op but like i feel like maybe if
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 4: you do do this all the time where it's like
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 4: oh well i planned you know to be the host
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 4: so like why can't i be the host you know
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 4: something whatever blah blah and everyone's just yelling.
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 2: At you and yelling at you and like this happens
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 2: all the time then yeah i'd be annoyed i'd be
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 2: like this guy again.
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 1: I mean i get it i would this is just
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: a game night this should be fun why is everyone
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 1: taking this so seriously kind of thing exactly why is
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 1: everyone talking crap about why are we yelling I would
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: honestly be like, I mean, everyone, again, is 16, 17, 18,
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 1: young adults. Why are we yelling? Why are we yelling?
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 2: The thing is, didn't even start the game yet. You
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 2: were yelling before the game even started. So obviously that
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 2: wasn't going to go over well.
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 1: I would go, quiet coyote, quiet coyote. But again, I
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 1: understand in the heat of things.
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 1: I get it.
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 2: I get where you're coming from.
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 1: Obi also continues saying, Emma and I had already discussed
• 1:07:25
  Speaker 1: had some minor disagreements while playing online games over the
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 1: previous few weeks. They weren't huge arguments, mostly just silly
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 1: disagreements over who got to choose what we played, but
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 1: there had clearly been some tension building. Jake and Ryan
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 1: used to be good friends of mine. Lately, things have
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 1: become more difficult because I've started standing up for myself more,
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 1: instead of always trying to keep the peace. I am
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 1: the youngest person in the group, and usually the one
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 1: trying to de-escalate the arguments. That doesn't excuse anyone's behavior,
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 1: But it's part of the background. Some people asked why
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 1: I stayed after everything happened. I actually wanted to leave immediately,
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 1: but Sophie... Again, Sophie is the one who asked me
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 1: not to leave because she didn't want to give everyone
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 1: the satisfaction of walking out angry. So, with that, I stayed.
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 1: And after a while, everyone acted like nothing had happened.
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 1: Even Emma said let's do a sorry dance. So we
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 1: did the just dance. Timber. Kesha. What?
• 1:08:24
  Speaker 2: This is so teenage coded.
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 2: Sorry, dance. Sorry, dance.
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 1: Let's do timber.
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 2: It's going down. Like what?
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 1: He says, I fully understand that telling Emma to shut
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: the F up and sit down was disrespectful. That's why
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: I apologized to her that same night. What hurt me
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 1: the most wasn't that she disagreed with me. It. was
• 1:08:46
  Speaker 1: that after I apologized, she told me that she wasn't
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 1: sorry for what she had said because she had actually
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 1: felt that way about me for a while. I was
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 1: the person who introduced her to this team, so hearing
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 1: that felt more like a betrayal than anger. I'm not
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 1: asking y'all to excuse the way I reacted. I know
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 1: I lost my temper. What frustrates me is that people
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 1: seem to be focusing entirely on my reaction while ignoring
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 1: that I was shouted at, insulted, and talked about while
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 1: I was sitting there. I apologized for my part. All
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 1: I really wanted... Was that for the other people involved
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 1: to acknowledge theirs as well? And we have an update.
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 1: I agree. Why am I the only one apologizing?
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'd have to agree with that as well. I
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 2: don't think that you are entirely in the wrong when
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 2: everyone was coming at you in different directions.
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 1: Do we also remember Ryan got angry that we got
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 1: paired up and then left? Yeah, are we going to
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 1: forget that? Are we just going to let that slide?
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like he acted like a baby. He's like, I'm
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 2: not being paired up with him. I don't like him.
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 2: I'm leaving.
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 1: I'd be like, goo goo ga ga. See, that's what
• 1:09:46
  Speaker 1: it sounds like when you talk.
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 2: And here's your diaper. Don't let it hit you on
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 2: the way out.
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 1: After the game night, I spoke to Sophie. She said
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 1: she wanted to stay neutral, but thought I shouldn't have
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 1: spoken to Emma that way. Especially because Emma is a woman.
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 1: I replied that, in my opinion, the issue should be
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 1: my behavior, not her gender. I asked whether she would
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 1: feel the same way if I had said that to
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 1: Ryan instead. And she admitted she probably wouldn't. We left
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 1: the conversation there and wished each other a good night.
• 1:10:13
  Speaker 1: The next morning, my coordinator texted me. apparently Sophie had
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 1: already contacted him about what had happened. He said he
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 1: thinks both Emma and I are good people who have
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 1: contributed a lot to the team, and that he wants
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 1: to hear my side before making any assumptions. He suggested
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 1: meeting in person with the three of us to talk
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 1: everything through calmly because he doesn't want a division within
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 1: the team. For now, I haven't responded. Yet. There are
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 1: some personal things happening in my life that need my
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 1: attention more than this situation, so I don't really have
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 1: the mental energy to discuss it right now. I also
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 1: don't feel the need to keep apologizing. I already apologized
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 1: that same night for telling Emma to shut the F
• 1:10:52
  Speaker 1: up and sit down, and I meant it. I'm not
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 1: taking that apology back. I think it's commendable for a
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 1: 16-year-old to actually apologize and be like, what I did
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 1: was wrong.
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree. I feel like they don't really do that.
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 1: But I would also go up to Emma and be like,
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 1: what did you mean by that? Like, I'm your friend, one,
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 1: but what did you mean by... it's been a while,
• 1:11:15
  Speaker 1: like you've been thinking about this of me for a while.
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 1: Can you give me context? Be honest with me, be
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 1: upfront with me. What makes you think that or what
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 1: has caused you to think this of me for, again,
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 1: said a while that I'm childish or I act like this?
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 1: Do I? Do you, OP?
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 1: I'm not there. I can't witness it. But if someone's
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 1: saying this, who knows you, if she has context or
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 1: proof or something along these lines, I'm like, hey, Sophie,
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 1: what Emma said, do you agree with that? Also, are
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 1: we just letting Ryan walk away by shouting at everything
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 1: or shouting at everyone to get what he wants?
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know why no one's talking about Ryan
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 2: because I feel like that, you know, well, I don't
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 2: know if that's a bigger issue than this. But, you know,
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 2: you decided to suck it up and you ended up
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 2: having a good night. So why are we all like,
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 2: you know, still talking about all of this and trying
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 2: to come up with a solution? Was there not a
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 2: solution yet? Because so what happened? Emma went to like
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 2: their boss.
• 1:12:13
  Speaker 1: Sophie did. Sophie did. The neutral person, yeah.
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 2: And went to the boss. I don't think the boss
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 2: even had to be involved. I think that's weird.
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 1: I think it's maybe cleared the air, which is fair.
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, but also, you know, they can do that.
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 2: This happened outside of work. It's not like it happened
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 2: during work, so I don't understand.
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 1: What still bothers me is what happened afterwards. When I apologized,
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 1: Emma told me she wasn't sorry for what she had
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 1: actually said because she felt that way about me for
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 1: a while. That honestly hurt me more than the argument
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 1: itself because I was the one who originally introduced her
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 1: to this team. I never expected her to automatically agree
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 1: with me, but I also didn't expect her to start
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 1: criticizing me while I was already being shouted at by
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 1: other people. If she had problems with me, I would
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 1: have rather much preferred it if she had spoken to
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 1: me privately afterward instead. Maybe we'll have the meeting, maybe
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 1: we won't. Right now, I'm focusing on other things, and
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 1: if we do talk, I hope it's a conversation where
• 1:13:09
  Speaker 1: everyone is involved and is willing to acknowledge their own
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 1: part in what happened, not just mine. And the verdict is,
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 1: everybody sucks here.
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 2: Yep, I'll agree with that. I think you guys are
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 2: worrying too much about this.
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 1: This is a game night, but I feel like this
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 1: needs to be brought up in certain layers here. This
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 1: is your friendship with Emma and why she thinks that way.
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 1: It's the argument during game night and why Ryan gets
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 1: to shout at me and shout at everyone to get
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 1: what he wants. I think we just need to clear
• 1:13:38
  Speaker 1: the air. Everything should be cool.
• 1:13:41
  Speaker 2: I agree with clearing the air. I just don't understand
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 2: why it now has to be like a whole company thing.
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 2: As much as it like it wasn't like a formal
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 2: company retreat or game night or whatever. But everyone who
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 2: worked there was there.
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah. But also I think you realize you lost your temper.
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's again with everything going on in your life.
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 1: Doesn't mean it's an excuse to say that to a friend.
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 1: You know, even it was to Ryan. I'd just be like, dude, stop.
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 1: Why are we yelling? A shouting match is not going
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 1: to win anything here.
• 1:14:18
  Speaker 2: And that's the end of the story.