Latest / Student Of Life / Comfort Is Killing You | Student Of Life Ep. 4 (JTT)
Transcript
- Tre: Most people aren't stuck because life is hard. They're stuck because comfort has become their lifestyle. Hey y'all, Tre here with Student of Life. We have with us once again our resident motivator in chief, the man the plan, ⁓ ⁓ Tim S: Everyone. Tre: I love it. Giving a shout out to all the people listening or watching. I love it. Well, I do want to say in this episode there's gonna be a couple of key topics that we'll be hitting. Tim, should I let the people know or should we just jump right into it like we've done in the past like three episodes? Tim S: You know what? Why don't we why don't we take a different approach this time? Tre: Okay, let's let's do this different approach. Well, this episode we'll be hitting on many topics, you know, from instant gratification, convenience addiction, avoiding struggle, and escapism. I know some of these ⁓ might be triggering, but hopefully not, because you know, this is really just a conversation. Now, I know that we said that we're not going to just jump into it. We're going to try a different approach. But if I hit on any of these points and you start jumping in there, you know what? I'm just gonna let you roll with it. Because in this episode, it's all about how your comfort is actually killing you. So things like avoidance. The convenience addiction phenomenon, fear of discomfort, lack of resilience, mental softness, and growth through pressure. Now, now, when I'm talking about mental softness, you know, everybody talks about mental toughness. You gotta have some mental fortitude, you have to have that toughness. But mental softness, that's actually counterintuitive, right? Tim S: I so I I've actually not ⁓ heard that very often with the metal softness. Yes, being tough mentally, with resilience and strength and and all of that, but the softness part not so much. Tre: You y you don't get That term soft when they're talking about Tim. Tim, Tim is one hard, mentally strong, hard person. ⁓ But that's what I'm saying. So so you haven't heard that term mental softness because it's the opposite side of it, right? And I don't think that most people really realize that that's probably where they're in is that mental softness phase. ⁓ so yeah, we're gonna definitely talk about that when we get into the nitty gritty of things. But here's my question to you my true question. question and this is where we can go back and forth because I know you're itching. You're itching to get into it. Do people fear failure or discomfort? Tim S: Ooh, I think that's ⁓ that's an equal fifty fifty of both right there. I I think there's individuals that fear both the discomfort ⁓ of things in life. ⁓ but I also think that it could go the other ways equally too. So ⁓ I think the starting with the the discomfort, most people don't wanna they They don't want to get out of their comfort zone. They don't wanna do something that's not familiar to them. and that's so many different things. I mean, you see that with ⁓ even foods, as it's something as simple as that. People don't want to try new foods or ⁓ you know, experiment with new ⁓ you know, delicacies per se, like if they go travel somewhere. y you could be on a cruise and land on an island somewhere and get off and you know, you see something, ⁓ yes, this is our local dish here. ⁓ I don't know. I'm used to, you know, primarily sticking with A, B, and C. I I don't know how this is gonna do with me, so they may avoid that. ⁓ same thing for stuff in school or relationships, just so many different things. ⁓ they wanna stick with what's been known to them for so long and what they've built that repetitive pattern with, ⁓ because you know, as soon as something pushes them outside of their comfort zone, you know, even slightly, things go awry. They they might panic, they might, you know the it's endless. So I I think you know that discomfort touches a lot of different areas in people's lives. Tre: Mm-hmm. Discomfort, wow. So so it's crazy that you went with discomfort. Or actually you ac you said that it could be both equally. And and I don't think that personally I don't believe that it can be equal. You know, I think that most people like I think that most people will fear failure. You know, discomfort, people can embrace, you know, embrace the suck is what they used to say in the military, you know, embr you know, it it sucks. Yeah, it's you're you're discomforted, you're you're tired or whatever, you're going through things. yes, embrace that. You know, most people can embrace that discomfort, but it's that failure. I think that that's what people are afraid of. It's like, okay, so if I try to do something. If I try and what if I fail? What if what if I I don't make the money back that I've invested in to starting my business? What if, you know, I try to go for something, you know, as an artist and my parents told me not to do this and I should have taken a safe job. And then now I'm letting them down and I'm s seeming like a failure to them. So they won't even try. I think The discomfort part I think that most people fear failure over discomfort. ⁓ but I hear what you're saying too, that it could, you know, be a little bit of both, but I think that more people fear failure than discomfort. What what what's your I mean, do you agree or not agree? Tim S: So on the the failure fr well so on the failure front let's let's take into account you know sports. So you know growing up, you know, if you're a kid that played sports when you were younger and continued on later on in life, you know, one of the things is and it's the the same into adulthood with professional sports, you're gonna lose games. You're gonna strike out, you're going to get Sacked if you're a quarterback, you're you know, the things are gonna happen to you, and those are all different types of failures, ⁓ you know, how you look at it. And I think it's how you're taught to handle those types of failures. because yes, you have business failures, you have failures when it comes to you know, financial decisions or you know. Taking that jump into a career that you know think is gonna be the best thing for you and ⁓ your your continued path of success forever. But I also think there's those smaller levels of failure that we need to focus on as well, too, of you know, looking at going through school. Okay, I didn't get an A on this paper, I got a C or I got a B. you know, in some people's mind that is a failure. and I really think it stems and it starts with how you know failure is taught to you from a very young age. ⁓ because, you know, I try and teach both of the boys, you know, who play sports, you're gonna lose. You're you're on you're playing a ⁓ a ⁓ Tre: No, they're not. No, they're not. No, they're not. They will win. They will always win. As long as they put in the effort. Maybe, maybe not always win. Whatever. Tim S: So so and and that's the thing is there I've seen it, you know, throughout time with other coaches and other parents and you know, they they strive for that perfection and a lot of times that does more damage than it does good because, you know, that's all that they're focusing on is that, you know, ⁓ perfectionism and and you know, being the best of the best, and then when something happens, they don't know how to take that failure. So I think it's also dependent on the person and how they're taught from the beginning on how to handle failure and how to navigate through failures. So yeah. Tre: There it is. There it is. So so I mean, you know, it's going back. Okay, so so I and I keep saying so so, right? So so ⁓ I should like be assigned to so so deaf. Is that even still a thing with Jermaine Dupree and everybody? No? Okay. So Tim S: We'll we'll check. Tre: Hey, we're not sponsored. Once again, we're looking for sponsors. So we're going back to the whole discomfort situation. You know, even as children, they're they're uncomfortable. They have that discomfort, right? I mean, they're doing something, they're actively building their muscles and stuff like that. And they're learning, you know, all this stuff. They're getting exhausted as well, too. but they're they're willing to go through that and push themselves. But that that fear of failure or how to deal with it, if they're not taught that then yeah, you know, they're gonna have that, you know, that fear. And then that'll probably prevent them from wanting to grow because they're they're gonna be like, Ooh, I don't wanna fail, you know? Or if they fail, they they don't know how to get out of it, you know. So I think that, you know, that this whole growth and comfort It can't exist in the same place for long. Like you're gonna be uncomfortable if you wanna grow. Tim S: Well and so one a good example is that is, you know, networking with ⁓ individuals. And that's one ⁓ you know, another life skill I try and teach the kids is, you know, we'll be out places and i you know, I might just a simple hello or, you know, you know, conversing with individuals that I don't know. And it's that finite balance of I know the whole stranger danger thing and not wanting to talk to people that you don't know, but at the same time you know, showing them that, hey, there's gonna be times where you're gonna need to talk to people that in a public setting that you might need help from something or you might need additional information on something, or you might, you know, just strike up a a a candid conversation about, you know, whatever the topic is, and it's okay to be able to do that. You like you want to be able to ⁓ know, feel comfortable doing it. I tell them all the time, you know, I travel, you know, all over the place for work. And I find myself in all sorts of different, you know, hotels and airports and you know places all over where I'm having to talk to people, you know, all the time, you know, someone someone new, someone different. ⁓ so you you have to I think it's a two faced or a two pronged approach. It's you have to be able to not be uncomfortable talking to people that you don't know because that helps you be successful in life because you're going through ⁓ you know job interviews you're going to you know i it it's applicable to to everything in life and if you're not willing to step out of your comfort zone for certain things, you know, you may end up failing at something else because of it. So I think it there are those situations and those scenarios where you have both of those things that you have to ⁓ look at ⁓ and then they work together at some point. Tre: Yeah. And we're gonna go deeper into this whole ⁓ conversation because in the full episode we'll be talking about all these different topics of growth and comfort, along with other conversational points too. But if you want to keep following this journey, go ahead and subscribe on Patreon for the full package. And if this content here that you just got at just the tip was just enough, then feel free to hit that like and subscribe button. And let's continue to learn, grow, and live together. We're gonna go ahead and take a break.