Latest / Untraditionally Lala / BONUS: Snake Confessions with Jim Jefferies

Transcript

BONUS: Snake Confessions with Jim Jefferies · Untraditionally Lala

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: This vander Pump Rules. That's on the TV throw back.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: That's a that's the old I always used to think
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: it was like a holiday, young people trying to shag
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: each other, and then an elderly woman walking gog what
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: you kids like?
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: And then that's literally you.
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: Show boy, stop it, get along.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the bonus episode of the Give Them All
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: A Podcast, we have your favorite comedian, Jim Jeffries. I
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: don't know. I'm I'm glad I didn't work out today.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: I know it sounds cheesy, but literally my stomach cards.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: So thank you for that because I I've been needing
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: my cup to be filled and you did that anyway.
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: No, what makes me laugh. That's why I've got a belly.
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: I'm sorry.
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: You doing right with me a bit more. I'll get better.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: You're not an ad workout. You can work me cobs,
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: so I like that.
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: I don't I can get you to do that.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: I say something you got away with that.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: On the topic of you hosting The Snake on Fox
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: and it's also streaming on Hulu Tuesdays. I love by
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: the way, YEP comes out on Tuesdays and again you
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: can stream it stream it Wednesdays Yeah, that's where I
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: go because I'm a binge watcher.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, me too. For the writings is better if
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: they watch you have any thing, But I'm a uli.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: You can watch it in a few episodes at a time.
• 1:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:35
  Speaker 4: And I can't be left on like that cliffhanger for
• 1:37
  Speaker 4: a week.
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: It's sometimes when you go back to regular TV, you
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: can't time your ships, can you know? You know what
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: I mean? Like I used to be able to time
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: an advert break, but I've lost that skill. I've lost
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: that skill. I come back, I'm like, who's the snake?
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: Missed everything?
• 1:58
  Speaker 4: Miss Like when you're back in the day, when like
• 2:02
  Speaker 4: the break was going, somebody went into the kitchen.
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: It makes negs somebody was peeing, and then you just.
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: Hear it's back, and then you.
• 2:11
  Speaker 3: Don't even wipe that well and then give you.
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: Then give you a little recap after the ad because
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: your might have forgotten something. What's happened just about two
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: minutes ago? They said this thing that you listened to already,
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: we gotta say it again, brilliant.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: With all of the things that become easier, it actually
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: becomes more complex. True, That's what I'm saying. So I
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: asked my friends on Instagram to tell us a time
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: that they've had to do something snaky, tell a lie
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: to get ahead. Now I'm going to tell you a
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: time that I lied to get something that I wanted.
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: It is not good. So I have this dog, Lily,
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: and we ordered an uber and I didn't realize that
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: the uber did not allow dogs in their uber. So
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: it was me and two friends and the dog. And
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: when he arrives, he tells me, no dog, I have
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: sunglasses on. So I pretended to be blind and Lily
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: was my seeing eye dog. I was drinking. I was
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: drinking heavily.
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: Rich would have added to it because you would have
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: bumped into things totally.
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: You're playing the part.
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: Well, it was very believable. I feel very guilty. I
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: did talk about it when I got sober on things
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: that I did intoxicated that I was not proud of.
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: Now did you did you do blind esque things? Like?
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: It made me felt so the drive or what what
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: ethnicity was? He?
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: I couldn't even tell you, Well, you were.
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: Blind, very good, You're very good, very good. That's how
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: this game, that's how you win this game. Like like
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: I was going to suggest, like if he was a
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: white guy. Listen, African American man and then you go on,
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: this woman's definitely blind.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: And maybe.
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: You can't tell from the voice, but he raises my
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: wife terribly from the voice.
• 4:06
  Speaker 3: I have to live with that, I guess.
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: Close close your eyes now, I'm going to talk to you.
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: How are you going? Are you going good?
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: What? What color am I?
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: You're wrong? I I have bits of Scottish in me.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: I have some irisky. I'm a white guy, yeah.
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: Very Caucasian.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: How do you feel on a level of one to
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: ten about my snake skills?
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: That that is pretty underhanded being blind? I'll tell you. Okay,
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: do you know the commedian Jimmy Carr?
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: No? Do you Jimmy?
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: If I were to see so many he's the English guy.
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: He speaks like this, I don't know, and he does
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: a lot of the races. Jimmy is one of my
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: very good friends. We just toured Canada together where we
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: did a double headline thing. We did like arenas or
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: ice hockey arenas and stuff. Because he's on a lot
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: of British TV, which is having Canada and of stuff.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: Jimmy's a roast comic right and he's sitting in the plane.
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: He's like in a two sitting on the plane, and
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: I'm behind him right, and each person who walks, I'm like,
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: oh my god, Jimmy cah, Oh my god, Jimmy cah,
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, Jimmy came and meets him and then
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: comes down and sits next to him. Is a blind woman.
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: So the only person on the plane who doesn't know
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: who he is sits down next to him. She's got
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: a guy dog and she gets in like this, and
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: I see him actually turn through it and he goes.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: She goes, what breed of dog is that? And she goes, Oh,
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: it's a She goes, it's a German shepherd. He goes,
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: is that what they told you? He's always funny and
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: she laughed. But I thought to myself, we're bout me
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: in a three hour flight. That's a risky fucking joke
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: if it doesn't land early on. But then you know
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: what you do. You just go, I'm gonna go sit
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: in another seat and you go clip clock like that,
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: and then he shut.
• 5:59
  Speaker 3: The If there's one thing I learned, you have to
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: say it wind loser. Maybe it has to be said.
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: So good you did good.
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: It was a good one.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: I think it was good. But what if they recognized you.
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: I wasn't on TV at that point in time.
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: Oh, nor would you be with that information?
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: I would not. It would have been canceled before I
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: even know.
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: How old were you when you were the blonde go
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: with the twenty three so you were main to the disabled.
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: Next, have you ever lied about something to get ahead teach?
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 6:33
  Speaker 3: Me and Aaron when we had our painting company.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: Oh what did you do?
• 6:36
  Speaker 4: We lied and said we'd been in business for over
• 6:39
  Speaker 4: five years so we could do the parade of homes.
• 6:41
  Speaker 3: Oh do I regret it?
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: Not at all? Oh. I definitely lie when I moved
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: to England about how much stand up comedy I've done
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: so I could see it some more open because it
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: was back in the days before the internet. I was
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: like a huge commit give me a bit of stage
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: time as long as I had the business. The lie
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: that I always think about in my life is, and
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: of course I'm like several times and you know everyone has.
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: But there was one for my childhood where there was
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: there was transformers. There was these two transformers actually machine
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: men back in the day, which is the knockoff version
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: of transformers. They were competing transformers versus machine. My mother
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: brought my brother a train that converted into a man,
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: and I had a motorcycle where the arms moved down
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: and the blad and you put the tire in. I
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: was in the I had the toy and I just
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: had it, and I had it for about ten minutes.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: I was trying to fit the wheeling and his arm
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: just snapped off like this, and I was like, oh,
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: I'm in a world of trouble. My mother was a
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: very angry person. We get very youngry. I was like,
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: oh no, little did I know as when I became
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: an adult, the toy that would have been worth like
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: ten bucks, right, but I thought I might as well
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: just throwing gold down the toilet, right, So I break
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: this thing and I'm just I'm just sitting in there panicking.
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: Oh god, fuck, I know, I'm in so much trouble.
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: And so I've gone and sat in my room. I'm
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: about I've about seven or something. My brother's maybe eleven
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: or something, and I'm sitting in my room just oh,
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: I'm understeing, knowing I'm going to get a whooping, right
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: I am, I'm gonna get I'm gonna get beaten for
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: this one, right, right, So I've broken this bucking thing
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: and I'm just sitting there. My brother comes in. He
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: comes in with his train because he just come home
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: from school, right. He comes in with the training, goes,
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: what one did you get? I got a train? What
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: one's your one? And I said, just get out of here,
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: just like you know, just get like this, And in
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: a split second, I just went like this, Mom, Scott
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: broke my toy. And I just said it. Scott broke
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: my toy. And he just looked at me like what
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: like that? Right? And I just looked at him and
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: just shrugged my shoulders. Here we go. He said he
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: hadn't done it, So Mom kept on hitting him because
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: he was lying. Mum kept on beating him up because
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: he was lying. And then and then Mum made him
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: give me his toy and apologize to me, right, and
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: he went, I'm really sorry for Frank. He got beaten
• 9:26
  Speaker 2: so much was he had to know he had to confess, right,
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: And he went there he gags, I'm sorry about this thing.
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: Say to this day, I can't fucking watch Transformers. My
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: son puts it on and I'm like, nah, I can't
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: like this. So for years and years I always have
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: a terrible conscience, and my years and years were watching
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: fressed up. I fashed up about four years later, or
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: maybe when I was like thirteen, I I I believe
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: the life. For years, I was like this, not you
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: broke it. And sometimes in so quieter moments, me and
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: my brother, who got along for the most part, we'd
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: be watching TV, and then you go, admit it. It's
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: just out of nowhere. You did this. You broke the
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: fucking transform broke it. Maybe it wasn't you, but it wasn't.
• 10:17
  Speaker 5: Maybe was asked, what toy you got, right?
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: Please? Right?
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, So I regret that. I regret that that was
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: a life lesson, though I haven't done that with another toy.
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: Since that's good, that's great, that is hysterical.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: At least I didn't act like I was fucking disabled,
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: swings aroundabouts, fucking I'm not a terrible person.
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: You did get your brother, yeah, like anybody.
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: He got me in trouble several He did similar the
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: things several times over the years, but he hadn't well.
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: A lot of the times he did in the future,
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: he said, was because of the machine men, and I
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: remember I used to try to play with that train.
• 11:11
  Speaker 3: You never felt good about it.
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: That is a five star story.
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well, if you put it up, my brother will
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: post it on his Instagram. I think he'd like a
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: public record of this.
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: I love it.
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: And then years later, years later, so she beat the
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: thing and then I passed up to it. So I thought,
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: I'll do the right thing all the way through, and
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: I went, Mom, remember that time you beat up Scott
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: over the transformer. I was the one who actually broke
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: the toy. And my mom went, why are you boys
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: worrying about that? That was but a year.
• 11:55
  Speaker 5: Water under the bridge that one?
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: Is he doing all right? Today's fine way, good man.
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: I'll tell him tonight. We played Call of Juty every
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: night together, like you know, because it's early in the
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: morning for him and not for me, so we probayed
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: a little half hour coll of JH. So I'll tell
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: him to he'll be You'll be chapped with that, but
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: he'll be made up with that evil love.
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: That story that made my day. Caitlin Woodford said, experience
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: on a resume, forever scheming on a resie. Fake it
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: till you make it, baby. There's a lot of people
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: use I couldn't do it as you. Like when I
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: wanted to be an actress, the biggest thing was don't
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: lie on a resume, Like if you say, if you're
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: gonna say your special talents are like horseback riding, you
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: better be fucking great at it, right. And then I
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: come out to LA and everyone's lying about what they
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: can do on all.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: About their special activities.
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: They yes, sure, yeah, but I was told from like
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: the time I started acting class at twelve to not
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: do that. And then I come out here everyone's been
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: doing it everything and I'm booking nothing.
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I look, when you're a comedian who goes into acting,
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: it's your resume is pretty people know who you are
• 13:13
  Speaker 2: before you come into I find the biggest problem for
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: me is because whenever I gets I said in an
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: audition last week, American accent, and I can coach for it,
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: and I can practice it, and I can get it
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: to be passable and all that type of stuff. But
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: because I'm so synonymous with being me, you go into
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: the audition, they can tell that they're trying to nitpick
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: when they hear you. Anthony Paglia, who's like a very
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: famous actor. One Tony Awards and Emmys and stuff like that.
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: He was going to play my dad in a sitcom
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: and he said, and he's Australian and the sitcom never
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: happened because of COVID, but he was going to be
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: my dad. And not many people even know he has
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: an Australian accent because when he started out of acting,
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: he'd go in for auditions and if he did, if
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: he came in said good day, here you're going and
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: then went all right, let's do the scene right, then
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: people would go they try to Nick Pick, and they
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: wouldn't know the area of the country that he came from,
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: and so he would go in as a bloke from Boston.
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: Whatever they were, he would go in as that person already,
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: so that it gave him mind you. On my sitcom
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: Legit many years ago, we had DJ calls. DJ caused
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: the skinny guy out of road Trip no matter of
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: hustle and flow. You've seen him, seen him in many things.
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: DJ played a person with muscular distrophy in my sitcom.
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: I came from a person in my real life that
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: had muscular distrophe that I was I am. My best
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: friend's brother had it and we took We took him
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: to a brothel. That's how the story case. But he
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: loves you guys. There was a girl there pretending to
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: be blind anyways. Anyway, so anyway, so so he he came.
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: We had all these like there is an argument with
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: disabilities as well, that people shouldn't play disabled if they
• 15:05
  Speaker 2: haven't got the disabilities. All the kid from Glee being
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: in a wheelchair who's not really in a wheelchair.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: Wow, I just learned that just now, right, But I'll.
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: Put him in one if I ever see with musket distribute.
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: So we tried to. If you watch that sitcom, we
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: had so many every other actor was disabled, every other
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: actor in the scene. I'm very proud of that. We
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: had all the disabled actors. Even in one scene. You
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: had to have a care for every two disabled actors.
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: And we needed one scene that had so many disabled actors.
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: I went, I went to the agency who has all
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: the disabled actors and said, I said, give them all
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: to me, right, I want them all. I want them all,
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: give them all. We need to play. We were doing
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: a home. I said, I need to populate a whole home.
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: I said, I want to give every disabled actor in
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: Los angeles work this weekend this week right, and we
• 15:54
  Speaker 2: did and they went. But we only have three handlers
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: and they can only handle two at a time, so
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: we can only ever floy six disabled actors in LA
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: at a time. Another lie, I'm legally allowed to do it.
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: And then we just we just bullshit it and we
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: had all that we had, like thirty disabled actors. Was it?
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: Did it go splendidly?
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: It was like hurting cats, But but it was good
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: and there was a lovely vibe and the thing. What
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: was my point? Oh, there were some actors who came
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: to audition for the Musca distriphe character who came into
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: the audition disabled. Oh, and they weren't. I found out afterwards.
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: I there was one bloke that I helped out of
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: the fucking room, picked up and walked him out of
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: the fucking room. I thought he had severe cerebral palsy.
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: There was nothing wrong with him, and he was just
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: in character.
• 16:58
  Speaker 3: Jim Jeffery is carrying.
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: I should have known when I put him in the
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: driver's seat. But that's life. I'm a giving person.
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, Kim Harper underscore, I said I won't
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: nag my husband and then I got a Cardia bracelet,
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: you said, Because she didn't. She promised, I will never
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: nag you again, and he was like, okay, if you promise,
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: and then he got her a Cardia bracelet. So she lied,
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: still nags him, just with Cardier on her.
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: How do you know she still nags?
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: They could be divorced now.
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, this is the thing is it would be you
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: would have to take it back. If there's nagging, you
• 17:41
  Speaker 2: can go take it back. And then if she goes
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: like this, when am I getting it? You're married? What
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: do you mean it's a gift of this. My wife
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: wears a Rolex. I went to put on a Rales
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: and it was missing links, it didn't fit around my
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: wrist and I was like, what the fuck? And it's
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: just married people. Yeah, good for you, married people. So yeah,
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: I want to see that blake walking around with his
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: Cardiir bracelet going not not She told me to the
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: bins out too many times.
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: So I'm taking it back. I'm taking it back, but
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: we're you going to put it in the share drawer.
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: What is the difference between nagging and asking?
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: I think it's the tone.
• 18:23
  Speaker 2: Do you consider yourself to be a nagger?
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: You know, I wouldn't know because I've never had a
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: productive relationship.
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: So you maybe.
• 18:34
  Speaker 3: Glad that somebody could point it out.
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it can't all be all their faults. Sooner or lady,
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: you have to look in the mirror.
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: And go, maybe this is my joke, and you're the
• 18:47
  Speaker 4: only person that has told her that, and she'll take
• 18:49
  Speaker 4: that advace.
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: You're lying on your emotional resume.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: You know what, Hey, that I needed that.
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: To under special skills s l M dunk.
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: My ex husband thought all of my jewelry was Cubic
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: Zirconia's when we got divorced, and I let him.
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: So she so she could cape all the different things.
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: I think she's a smart bitch.
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: Nothing wrong with a little white lie. What do you
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: mean I'm going to tell my wife that child's a
• 19:28
  Speaker 2: cabbage patch doll to get custody.
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: Told my current boss I had a job offer for
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: more money, so he would pay me what I wanted.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: I feel like that's a common thing. This one is.
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: Nicole La said she told her current boss that she
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: had a job offer for more money so he would
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: pay what she wanted.
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a bluff. The people do that with you know,
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: if you're trying to sell a car. I know another
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: bike story offered me that, you know what I mean, I.
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: Think that's more of a bluff than like a snake.
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: It's a I think that's more than I think that's fair.
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: I think we all do that in our.
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: Day to day and also and also if like you
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: can call people's but they could have backfired on it,
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: so risk reward, right, Yeah, So then the boss goes, fine,
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: go take that job, and then you're like, ah, I'll
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: just stay here, just better parking spot. Yeah, I see.
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: If I know, something's got to be set in stone
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: for me to like bring in the heavy artillery, like
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: I'm not unless we have something to fall back on,
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: because you never know, you never fucking know. Told my
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: boss I was sick and needed a shot. I really
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: was sick from work and needed a shot of tequila.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we've all called in sick, all of us. Everyone's sick.
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: You know what ruined so.
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: Far, I'm winning the sneak game.
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: You know what ruined calling in sick? Bloody camera phones.
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: Back in the day, you could all be dressed up
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: in your beach outfit, ready to go. Just get on
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: the phone. I'm just not feeling well. Now you got
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: to get a box of tissues and make up around
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: your nose.
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: And oh wait, I did that too. I didn't want
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: to go to English class for like the seventeenth day
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: in a row. So I went to school after the
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: fact and put makeup around my eye to make it
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: look like I got in a fight and couldn't make
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: it to school.
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: Why don't you just okay, say okay? I had I
• 21:27
  Speaker 2: had one. So I was feeling really sleepy. I woke
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: up one morning and I felt really sleepy, and I thought,
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: I'll have the day off school. Always the best, right,
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: sit at home, watch Star Wars do nothing.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: Way better than a day chill from school is way
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: better than a weekend.
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: You got the house to yourself, no one's there. You're
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: like happy as Larry. You think I'm going to get
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: some tissues around me for when mum gets back. And
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: so I had banked off school, right, I'd wagged off school,
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: and I was having a sick day. And then I
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: thought the next day, I thought to myself, do I
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: dare because maybe I'm not over this illness.
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: Maybe make sure for the other kid.
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: Maybe I'll take a second day this thing, this thing
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: seems to be lingering, and then I wake up. I
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: was a bit tired. The next morning. I thought, what
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: what trouble could I get into? Let's go for three, right,
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: But my mother had if you made it to three,
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: she had sort of a policy that was like, all right,
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: well now you have to go to the doctors, right.
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: So I went to the doctors and I'm there. I'm like,
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: I've played me hand here. I'm at the double and
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: so I was sitting there, he goes, what symptoms you got? Like, ah,
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: A bit tired, a bit this, a bit that, Yeah,
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: just not feeling me best and all this type of stuff. Right,
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: And so he goes, We'll have to do some blood work,
• 22:48
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, I feel like today, Like today I'm
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: on the mend, like I'm on the I'm in I'm
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: going in the right direction, even though I'm not healthy
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: per se. Anyway, So now he's pulling blood out of
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: my arm and I'm not sick, and I'm like, he's
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: getting blood out of me anyway. The blood tests come
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: back I had mono blandela fever. That's why I was
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: tired all the time. I wasn't lying.
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: Feeling ever I was like, yes, now you get more
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: da So how many days did you really get home
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: that six months after that?
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: No, I got to have like a day off every
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: couple of weeks because it makes you tired. And it's
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: the kissing disease, isn't it? First girl I kissed?
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: Though people are kissing all the time and not getting
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: mono anymore? Is it only like pre pewbas it's teenagers.
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: Teenagers get it. It's a teenagery type thing and you
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: only get at once in your life.
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: But why is it a teenagery thing?
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: Because you do too much tongue as a kid, isn't
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: it you learn to you learn to settle down on
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: the tongue as you get older in the teen age
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: striding suck on it?
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: Infection?
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: Who's the Snake?
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: You? Every Tuesday on Fire.
• 24:13
  Speaker 3: Every Tuesday streaming on Hulu next day.
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: Look, I tell you can have Jeff Proost on the
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: show from Survivor and he won't tell you a story
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: about the Transformers or no, no, he'll be all level
• 24:26
  Speaker 2: with you. Oh we don't want that.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: That's hard. I like when I do podcasts. I like
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: feeling like it's a conversation piece.
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: I feel like there's so many podcasts now, and it's
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: the wild West of media because like radio, half of
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: these things we couldn't have done, or they'd be hidden.
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: Dump buttons on us, right right, it's good.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: It is good.
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: It's good because the only people who are angry I guess.
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: I don't know if people listening with their kids in
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: the car, aren't they?
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: I think people know what that did she call?
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: Let's see, let's see.
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: Why don't we try one more time to stop being
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: a bloody you give.
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: Her a call if if she sees both of us,
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: because she tried to call me. I got a miss call,
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: I got missed call. I got a miss cool and
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: and and and the thing is, and the thing is,
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: I know what she's doing.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: She's at restaurant.
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: Her and Gordon are like this. They're like this, I'll
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: beat you all restaurants. I'll beat your restaurant. And then God,
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: have you seen Gordon's news show where she is just
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: act like you know me for crying out loud? I
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: love you too. Where's God? He must he must know us.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: I can't. I can't. Where's Gordon? Where is he?
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: That would be you reckon? He's just in there grunting
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: right now?
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: You donkeys behaving? Oh he is so funny. I can't breathe.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: And then he told me that he knows you super well,
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: and I said, we have to call her. I tried,
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: you just started shooing.
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: I love him. Have you met?
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: Yes, she's right here, right behind the camera. It's so exciting.
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: All right, we'll go film your commercial. The eye is great.
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: I would love to see you. I love you. I
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: don't want to hold you up a few days, all right,
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: and I can't wait to join.
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: All right? Is that? I like that? Do you want
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: to come to dinner with Lisa? Let's all do it.
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: Let's do it. Where we going? Where's where's your favorite
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: spot to go?
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: And I'm coming? Wait? No, no, no, kids, please?
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: Kids?
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: How long you had dread books? Full?
• 26:59
  Speaker 3: Two and a half years now?
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: He gets a lot of heat for his dreadlocks. How
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: do you feel about them?
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: Look, he's a white guy. It's quite essentially it's dirty
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: hair when you're right, but I have curls.
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: He does have great hair.
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: You get rid of it. I look, I can't grow one.
• 27:18
  Speaker 2: I couldn't grow a dreadlock except for my big toe.
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: There seems to be a lot of hair, and.
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: I'm not kidding you.
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: I'll put a sock on and it'll snag them.
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: You guys, I'm repulsed by all this. Yeah, probably, I'm
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: glad I nag because if that's what I have to.
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: If the man is his long dreaded toes, gross, well he.
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: Gets to look at him. If I sit with my
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: feet together, it's like back in, it's like belt grow.
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: Then two of them sit together. I try to get
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: up on a trip over.
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: I love all of this.
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: Sometimes if I got like this big toe doesn't have
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: as much hair on it is this one. So what
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: I do is I put this one next to it
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: and then I comb it over so it looks like
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: they both.
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: Is that one of your bits stage?
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: Honestly think that's my stand up.
• 28:06
  Speaker 3: You could say anything in it, and I like, ladies
• 28:09
  Speaker 3: and gentlemen.
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: Thank you very much.
• 28:12
  Speaker 3: Try home.
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: I can't. Okay, that was a great bonus episode. We're
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: already done. I be sticking around. Yeah, we're easy.
• 28:24
  Speaker 3: Uh you guys, there was more.
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: Huh I could do this will day.
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: Thank you for listening to another episode of the Give
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: Them La La Podcast. The Bonus episode with Jim Jeffries
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: Catch the Snake on Tuesdays on Fox. You can stream
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: it the next day on Hulu and go to Jim
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: Jeffries dot com to see where you're.
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: Oh, you're Jim Jeffries' Needs.
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: You're Jim jeffries Needs. Thank you again, I appreciate you.
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: We'll catch y'all next week