Latest / DA CREW Podcast / DA CREW PODCASTSEASON 1_ EPISODE #34 HOST PAMELA J_(SHOW #2)

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DA CREW PODCASTSEASON 1_ EPISODE #34 HOST PAMELA J_(SHOW #2) · DA CREW Podcast

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M hmm aplotize with us ht A Enterprise. Allow your brand to be heard
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and seen around the world on the Crew podcast the Hottest thing going on this
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side of the can connected to the Crew podcast and allow your brands to be
0:58
heard and seen around the world. H h. Girl of the Panjo,
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the brad Word message a message alone. M h it's a town. Hey,
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what's going on? Everybody? Hey, it's your girl, the OVG
2:37
and Lady T and we are here live the Brown Girl high Stag. We
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got this on the Crew Crew podcast. I'm having toughtical difficulty because every time
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I go live it's saying, well, while we work through these technical difficulties,
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I'm Lady T and yes, this is brown Girl has tag. We
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got this with the OBG or the Pamela Jay. Oh, look she's back.
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Let's see. It's still not letting me um. It's okay. It's
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technical difficulties. That's okay. The picture is beautiful. Nonetheless, Yes,
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we are here live. Lady Tea. How are you doing tonight? I'm
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feeling great, Hey, Latania, Michelle, how are you? Erica?
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Thank you for tuning in. Welcome everybody, Hey, Patricia, guys are
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great for tuning in. I love our engineer, miss Angela. Thank you
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so much. So what's today's show about? Obg oh my goodness. UM,
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we have a UM. First of all, I'm welcome. Well,
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I'm glad we're back after a couple of years live because we were on SADOR
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Radio and then we came off and now we live UM on the Crew podcast,
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which is amazing. Thank you Anthela for having us on the show.
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I want to talk a little bit about how people are defined by the way
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they look, and especially in the African American community and all the communities,
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by their hair, by their hair, by their um and I firsthand just
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experienced this, and I was devastated that my own husband had a problem.
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Was here and years. If you put my neck on a chopping block and
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said, um, he wouldn't have we spawned like this my head would.
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I would have been dead. So I'm gonna um yeah and UM I had
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to hear. It was really um eye opened and experience for me. But
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he was the only one. He wasn't. It was a lot of people,
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women, men, everybody was acting different. And I mean I look
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throughout my years, I am now fifty five years young, A whole week.
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Last week Tuesday was my fifty fifth birthday. Also, this is ten
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weeks cancer breast cancer free. Yea. So during my journey, for everybody
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that knows me, knows I wear lace front, we'ves I've cut my hair,
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I've colored my hair throughout the years. I've had short hair, curse,
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you know, all different type of haircuts. That's just everything I am.
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Everybody knows I am a demon at all. Course he long hair,
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short hair, whatever. All women are like that. Um yeah, topic,
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yes, so and thank you, thank you for the birthday love.
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Um. Unfortunately, because I was um diagnosed October the twenty seventh three with
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breast cancer, I braided my hair. So I was, oh, during
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the treatment, it might can save my hair. Okay, alcohol, it
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didn't save my hair. I Um. I woke up one morning and three
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of my braids from the middle of my scalp was in my pillow. Wow.
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First off, before you proceeded with the story, explain how that actually
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felt like boom, I would wake up, turn around you see it.
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I mean I was like I saw the hyper ventilating, I was crying.
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I was devastated, Like, what the hell, how did my hair?
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What is going on. And that was the reality of yeah, this chemo,
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this radiation is about to take or your hair out of your head.
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Okay. So I was devastated by the three braids that already had came out.
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So I said, let me take these braids out and let me just
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cut my hair so it won't devastate me as much. And because your decision,
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it's not pouring out, it's not falling up. What else? Yea
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so lorber Hall, I went to the barber and I cut my hair.
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Okay, then I think I'm beautiful. I mean that day I cried,
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I kicked, I screamed, I was upset. I mean, the Toya
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Lady team was like, you're beautiful. Everybody gonna tell you you beautiful.
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But you know, because you're going through cancer, you're going through whatever else
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that you're going through. But you're here. Women. I were here as
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I crown and boy, I'm sorry it is and me me, oh please,
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I was just devastated. But a Luba Hall, you know, I
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got a lot of grape feedback saying him, it looked like you just cut
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your hair and looks great. You look good, you look beautiful. I
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don't know if they were saying that to get me over the hump, or
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I mean because I started to embrace it myself and other choice. Did you
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really have though? But because ever had said you took over the situation.
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So if you're taking it over, gave you that power to go forth right,
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So so sawry guys technical difficulty. So I um, I tried to
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take over the situation because I wanted to feel like I was in control of
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the situation. You had it was necessary. And not only that, the
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doctor, my oncologist, was like, you cannot put anything on your head
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because the radiation had burnt my scalp at this point, so it had to
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heal. So that meant that I could not You know, I couldn't.
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I couldn't do it exactly. No, it's not that you couldn't. You
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just wasn't ready at that moment. Because you did. You did finally come
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to terms with it. You started getting your big earrings and adjust to the
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situation the best way you know how, with your diva shades. And you
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were still you. So the late trint doesn't make you. It has nothing
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to do the reaction that you've got. You just gotta understand sometimes that people
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are just used to seeing something and they just didn't get used to you cutting
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it. Okay, but again they could have handled it better. Oh yeah,
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absolutely, okay, I told me, Remember I cut my hand,
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so decent. But January February, all of these three months March, I
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had no like, my head started to go back. It was you know,
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it was growing back, it was getting healthier. My doctor I kept
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saying, ken, I put on the wig. She was like, now
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yet, Pamela, just you know, give it a chance. Whatever.
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So my husband is incarcerated and at sing Sing Correct facility, the CEOs embraced
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me. They were like, oh, you look beautiful. I mean it
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looks like, you know, you just cut your hair like a hair style,
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because that's kind of like what the style is. I couldn't even die
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my hair, so I had to really embrace it. So this particularly,
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I went to see my husband and he was like, we need to talk.
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I was like, hey, Dad, how are you doing. He
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was like, look, I really don't like your hair. I don't like
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that. I think you slipping. M I got quiet. I said,
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I'm slipping. First of all, I'm or I'm deaf, I'm I'm like
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from hand to our toe floorless, nail's done. Everything else is that.
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Everything is done. Even my hair is done because it got to be a
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curly texture. It was curly, it was it was like nice I had
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it. It was real cute. But this my m fan, her husband
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said I was slipping. Yeam shocked. I said, he is her number
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one fan, y'all, so I know what she's that. I'm devastated because
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I'm black. I said no. I said, no problem. I said
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I'm slipping. I'm gonna slip away. So he was like, no,
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I'm just saying, it's hurting me that you look like that. I look
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like what you're starting to look your age now. People asking me what's wrong
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with you? And I was like, what I supposed to me, my
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rock, my better half, my rib telling me about my hair. Did
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it hurt me? Yes? And did it devastated me yes? Did it
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wake me up? Yes? And Angela had me do a conference at the
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same time about releasing, which was good, which was an amazing thing for
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me to do because I had to get into myself, read my Bible,
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look at the definition of what release was. And I kept myself like this
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through the whole seventeen minutes until it was time for me to come alive so
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everybody can see the beautiful me with my hair short. Oh yeah, that
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was a great opportunity for you to truly release. The release and the devil
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really uses people, your husband, your kids, everybody at the point.
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But I wanted to just I love me in all courts. But I wanted
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to feel different for just two minutes, like I wanted to feel like myself
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before cancer. Yeah, it felt like cancer just once. October twenty he
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said, twenty twenty three hit and they said I had cancer. Everything that
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left, like everything was about cancer and about me being right and me doing
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this right and doing that right. Not me, Pamela. So for my
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birthday, I was like, God, please just let me for and for
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my birthday, my head, my my scout killed. My head grew back,
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and they was like, you could put on a lace front wig if
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you want. Yes, So yes, my girl, the lace a sassin
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in Connecticut. Yes, wait, wait, no, satan. You gonna
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have to say that a good three time for me because she'd be laying at
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the whole the lace assassin. That's what her name is. Daisy a Ship
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about nineteen years old. She always laces my lace fronts. So I didn't
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because I wanted to surprise him, you know, my birthday. But of
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course he's so nosy. He heard me in the background getting my heads on.
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This is the same person. I'm telling me. I'm the same.
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I don't act different or anything. I'm always I'm always dramatic, I'm always
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over the top. I'm the same. Wait weight here, we're out.
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I put on my hair last week Tuesday, I went to so it was
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my birthday, you thought, I mean it was bananas that people that know
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me. I went to one of my he's a business part as a mine
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of mine. He owns a car dealership. Now I want to get a
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new car, so he said. I said to him, no, but
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this time I want to because he used he's certified pre owned cars. I
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said, I want to walk in with five thousand this son of a gun
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in the place where my head lace. I'm cute, it's my birthday.
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He said, oh oh, she back. She back to the point.
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He was like, what call you one? What? I just put this
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here? Now it's what car went. Now you can go out. You
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could drive out any car you want right now. And you know we could
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work out the details. Later, I said, where's your wife? Where
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is your wife? My husband? I walk up into the jail. Oh
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my baby back. I am the same chick before cancer, africancer, but
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now I got my lace front on again, so now I'm your baby again.
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Really did not understand the magnitude of where he hurt me until this weekend
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when we went on our UM in New York and sing sing. They have
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this thing called family Rehabilitation where UM if the inconsrated individuals are on their best
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behavior, you have to be legally married, and it's a whole bunch of
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other things you get to every other month go out on its core family rehabilitation.
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But I qual a vacation because it is a vacation because we go Friday,
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no cell phones, no nothing. I'll tell you, I'm off the
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grid. I'm off the grid until I come back out on Sunday one pm.
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And I just did that this last weekend because it was around my birthday.
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I did it and I went in Ye so mys and I was tight,
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like I wasn't I was. He was like, you acting different,
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No, you're acting different. And I said to him, you know what's
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so funny? This proves to me that you won't work to drool off my
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mouth if something happens to me and he didn't understand what my soul was.
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I sat meaning because not only did I am still battling with the cancer.
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Ten weeks kids are free, I'm a diabetic. It's better for the last
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twenty five years of my life and counting God forbid. If my leg is
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going and they got to gut it off, you leaving me because I got
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one leg now and I'm in a wheelchair. What did he say? How
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did he respond? Huh? How? He true, I'm gonna that's not
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true. That's not true. He was like, no, it's not true.
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No, it's not true. He was like it's He was like,
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um, he was like, I wiped the jewel off. I said the
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jewel was cancer and you got a heart attack. You taught me. I
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don't like the way the sides your hair look. I don't like I don't
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like that. I don't like people coming up to me asking me what's wrong
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with you? I said, you act like I was a crackhead or something.
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No, but you also you're acting like that was my choice. It's
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my choice. It wasn't my truth to understand. I'm just dealing with the
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situation the best way that I can. And so it means that my hair
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defines me. People say that all the time, but us as a people,
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we need to really look at ourselves. Because I put on this here
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like I'm miss America. Well I got a call thrown at me. My
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husband was acting different and to the point where Saturday night, I've really got
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his attention. I was like, I broke down, crying, like I
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was crying, like crying, crying, and he couldn't handle it. And
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remember we get inside of a prison, so when you walk outside the cottage,
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he ain't going a whipper right to the gate. So when he walked
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out, I took a shower and went to sleep. He must have came
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back maybe an hour, Lady. He was soaking red and he was crying.
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He was like, I'm sorry, and I didn't understand what you meant
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until now. But it had to take me to this for you to understand
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how you made me feel. No, I always thought you was beautiful.
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Know you didn't you would not wipe the jewel off my mouth because you said
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to me you didn't like the way my hair looked so he does play a
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role on a lot of different things in the way that we looked for jobs
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and for getting cars and getting things. And people like to say it does
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it, but it does. It plays a part. I want to touch
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on something real quick before you and Sinue, who was it? Listen to
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what he said. It wasn't just that, you know he didn't like it
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because he seed it like he seed it like that short and didn't make those
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same comments. It was the other people asking him questions that bent his mind,
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you know what I mean. So what you're saying is absolutely true.
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Society with society here plays such a crazy part. It's not even because you
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you altered his mind. You know this. You know other people were capable
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of altering his mind because I wasn't he good with it? At first?
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He was like, I mean, if he wasn't he didn't say anything.
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He didn't say anything, and it was like all the size you know,
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it's standing of course because it's chemo and radiation. What did you think was
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gonna do it? And what did you think what's gonna happen? Yeah,
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understanding this is this is what I am. And if you guys wanted to
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ask a question. Yes, please, you can call us at nine one
20:08
four four one seven nine ones nine six and you could come on live and
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ask a question or give your opinion about what we're talking about. This is
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the brown girl has to ag we got this shut. I would actually love
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to hear what Erica has to say, because not too far back, you
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know, in the check Erica brought up it is taking her time to embrace
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her natural beauty. You know, it's such it becomes such a difficult thing
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because honestly, we're kind of brainwashed, especially as little girls. You know,
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you gotta have your hair straight, or you have to have it long,
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or it has to be but it doesn't have to be that. It
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has to be healthy. It has to be strong, you know. So
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anybody, what's the number again, Pamela, just in case they didn't get
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it the first time. Ninety four four one seven nine one nine six,
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And that is us right now live. If you or you could chat,
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you know, I'm typing the chat. Put the number in the chat.
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Okay, somebody put the number in the chat. Okay, thank you,
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great advice. Nay Smith, shot Smith. Yes, so now are we
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gonna we you you came to terms with having to cut it and having to
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do the low cut, and you see the different personalities or the different types
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of treatment. Are we gonna like see so back and forth between the lace
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runs. Are you gonna keep it natural? What are you? What are
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your intentions? Especially knowing you know the reaction both like this summer like I
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want, like I said for my birthday, hold we out of Paula.
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Yay, thank you, Poler. Welcome Erica and the voice. Hello,
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Hello, hello, my New York sisters. How are you? We are
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fine? Erica? Thank you for tuning and with us today. What do
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you have to say about this, this comment, this this thing, this
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what we're talking about. First of all, I want to say, you
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know what, God is good. I've heard you praise m tam so I
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salute you in your healing. That's the first thing I want to say.
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You know, God is good. He got you. They don't want to
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say to you ladies, energy is Oh my God, because y'all got me
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over here, like what? And then the third I want to say is
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that listen, God has a sense of humor. Because I have five daughters,
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five daughters, and I don't know a lot about doing here. I
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don't know how to braid. I don't know the part. I don't do
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any of this up. So I have always, always always paid someone to
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not only do all five of my daughters here until they learn how to do
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here and to I started, you know, also paying to do my hair.
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And now that my youngest is twenty one, and I learned when she
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was like sixteen, ship about to leave here, girl, what you're gonna
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do with your here? So like like him said, I'm used to having
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my weeds, you know, my wigs. You know, I'm listen,
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I'm gonna go outside unless my hair is straight. But now I am not
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gonna do it here. What am I gonna do? So I shaved it
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all off and then I would I was like, but that was back like
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in twenty eighteen, twenty nineteen, I shaved it all off twenty eighteen.
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I became depressed because I was like, wow, I really don't know how
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to embrace this because I'm six foot, you know. And then now,
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huh we said beauty, beautiful newbie and queens that's right. So I'm learning.
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I'm learning to embrace my hair without because society, what have you thinking?
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Like you said the street the weeds, the wigs, right, you
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have to look a certain way or else you look like a bomb, like
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you said, a crackhead on a street. And what's true? Husband?
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So girl bomb was true? Devastated when he you know, said that?
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For god, Alica, I'm sorry, No, I'm biving off of you,
24:33
ladies because your rockets. But let me let me ask you this.
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How did you? How did you? How did you? How did you
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say? Because you're holding him down, you're going through cancer and meetings and
24:45
you're trying to keep it together for everybody out so and building a brand I
24:53
didn't hear you, and building a brand and building a check that out?
25:00
So how do you feel? How did you really feel? I was devastated
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and I cried my soul out. I thought the one person, like I
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said, I thought the one person that would have me, and I mean
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me and my husband's relationship. It's that's a whole other story. But I
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felt like my my, my protector, even though he's inside of there,
25:26
I'm never afraid. I feel like he protects me at all. Course,
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but my protector, I rock. You know, my my my, my,
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my king that you know that puts me up on this high pedestal,
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just kick me in my gut. And I felt like he would not wipe
25:42
the jewel off my mouth, which meant, if I get sick, God
25:48
forbid and I need your help, You're gonna leave me where I stand because
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I'm not the beauty, beautiful person that you first met or you think I
25:56
should look like or where I should be represent and you or whatever, you're
26:02
you vain and you're thinking about what other people are thinking, and you should
26:06
and you you should have held you had up high. I was like,
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my wife is fine, she's gonna be okay, she beautiful and what exactly,
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But that's not what he said, and it told me where I stood.
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But he understands now because, like I said, I cried like I
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cried a river on Saturday, and he looked at me and he went outside
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and was standing in the rain for at least an hour because he didn't even
26:30
know what to say, what to do, how to react. And when
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he came back inside, he was crying. He was like, I'm sorry
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I let you down. Yeah, dude, you let me down, You
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hurt me, you broke me, and you that again. And I told
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him, I said, you can't ever do that again or you will be
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in the husband graveyard. Yes, you be. I love it when you
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say that. Did that? Did that ship away at any trust? Yeah?
26:55
Because you remember you had him on a pedestal just way. Yes,
27:00
I mean it did. I trusted you with everything and now that reaction,
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he has a long way. I mean it's not a deal breaker. It's
27:15
not a deal breaker. Hurt. Yes, am I devastated? Yes?
27:19
Does he have a lot of work and make it up to do? Hell?
27:23
Yeah, he has to build that trust again because I told him I
27:26
don't believe you're gonna be there, God forbid if something happens. And he's
27:30
trying to convince me otherwise. But he has to show me. It has
27:34
to. It has he has to. He has to gain that trust back
27:37
because I gave it to him in the beginning. Yeah, you lose it.
27:44
It's hard for you to get it back. So he knows he got
27:47
a long road to getting it back. Okay, let me him if I
27:52
can, and then I'm gonna be gune. I let me get him by
27:53
my question. So you are a New York sister, and for some reason,
27:56
the world perception of women, especially black woman in New York were strong.
28:02
Nothing can break up because if you can survived in New York, you
28:06
can survive anywhere. And I'm shouting out with tying it because she says she
28:08
loves the accents. But what did that? You were so strong that he
28:15
didn't even think that? Like do it this way? My wife was a
28:21
strong movie and Queen, I've seen so many things coming her way and she
28:26
handled it. So do you think maybe he didn't think it was that bad
28:30
because of your strength? A deep Danny, that's real deep. But um,
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I asked what the whole thing is? I did ask him. I
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did ask him, um, like, why do he feel like you know?
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I was slipping? Because he said I was slipping because he was like,
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oh, you know when we first met, you said I'll never catch
28:56
you slipping. I said, so an illness is slipping, Like then you
29:00
can tell that it's different about me? Is my here? And I did
29:03
lose a lot of weight because of like I was losing the weight beforehand because
29:07
of the diabetes, but because of the radiation and the DMAX and everything else
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I lost. I mean I went from aside sixteen to a size eight.
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I'm a size eight right now. So that was like, a yeah,
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that's deep. I never thought about that, and that's a very good question.
29:32
But it could be that. But I just think for him, it
29:37
was just the vainness of Remember they there are in prison and they have a
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certain persona that they like try to stand or live by, and kind of
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sort of a lot of people know me because I'm an author, I do
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this, I do that. They a lot of the CEOs follow me on
29:53
all of my social media so they know what I'm doing or whatever. So
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I think it was a little bit of a everything, but for my vulnerability
30:03
on Saturday, and he saw how he really ripped me apart on Saturday.
30:07
So I believe um praying that it won't happen again for any sickness or illnesses,
30:14
but I pray that you know, he'll you know, he'll learn and
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he'll build because he has a lot of he has to build the trust back
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on that level. Yeah again, Yes, and here's when last thing I
30:29
thought I was done. It could be awful. He was scared. Sometimes
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when we scared, we say, maybe oh my rock is about to because
30:38
cancer. When we hear cancer, you know what we affililated with, yes,
30:42
death, So may that fear so I'm gonna hang up, but you
30:48
ladies Rock, I'm gonna get you back up on on the Crew in the
30:52
group. But Lady T and Pam you ladies Rock, I appreciate thank you,
31:00
thank you. I love you, love you too, thank you so
31:02
much, thank you. And YC. Yes everybody, yes, yes,
31:11
everybody tuning in from tell me what you'd tell us what you'll think about this
31:18
here situation? Yes, you know what do you think we should do?
31:22
And um, we're gonna have to take a commercials um we live, but
31:26
um, angie, I believe we have to go to commercial now, so
31:29
you could try to do us a commercial and I'm gonna try to go live.
31:40
You need to get your book reviews or do you want a little bit
31:44
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gallant friends dot com or email us at SC book Gallant Friends at tamail dot
32:00
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32:07
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32:23
A, jayda OVC and LADT. You are listening to the War Magazine podcast
32:30
on the Crew podcast, so stay tuned. This is our show enjoy.
32:36
Oh yeah, yeah yeah, strong justice system and we gonna think yes.
32:52
Hello, Hello, we are bag. Welcome back to Brown Girl hashtag we
32:59
got this. I'm lady t the OBG. Hey here, the og is
33:06
here. I've just got the technical difficulties. I'm still trying to get this
33:08
camera to work and it's now workers. I'm so solvy, y'all. Oh
33:15
well, we miss you a beautiful face, but the picture, the picture
33:17
is doing your justice. Hey North Camelina Lingington, I hope I said that
33:24
right. Hey, everybody yays, Oh my god, I'm so excited.
33:31
You know. Oh wait a minute, or Diamond said Black Diamond said Covid
33:37
pol Maggie'll also out. So I cut it off. I've been natural ever
33:42
since, except when I wear my wigs. Okay, yes, I hear
33:45
that girl. Wait, but how ladies, because I'm as obg, I'll
33:52
cut my heir all day with no problem with ease, Like it's gotten on
33:55
my nerves. Snip snip, snip snip. But that's my comfort level.
34:00
So how does it make you feel to just chop it off? You know
34:07
what I mean? Like, you know, when Covid started to pull it
34:12
out, how were you feeling, you know, give us a call.
34:15
What's the number again? The number is also in the chat, but give
34:19
us a call. I would love to know how you felt when something else
34:22
was doing it. It's usually my decision because I've mistreated it or something like
34:27
that. So I'm like, you know what, I'm just gonna start fresh,
34:30
rebuild, and then it'll start the whole process again. But it's still
34:35
my decision when it's something else taking what is so called classified as our beauty.
34:44
How how how are you feeling you too? Or the Pamela ja?
34:55
Yes, oh how did it make me feel? I mean, um,
35:00
oh my goodness, um it just I just um, like I said,
35:08
for me, I cut it because I was I was already devastated because three
35:14
three braids fell out, so they wanted to devastate me. They devastate me
35:19
anymore. So that's why I cut it. And it was at first two
35:22
days, three days, I was trying to get into it and trying and
35:27
trying and trying it, and finally I was like, you know what,
35:29
I'm beautiful, I'm good. I'm good. Then I was good with it.
35:34
Well in your situation or for your circumstance, right, they had other
35:39
options. Can you tell us those options that you were given that you voted
35:45
against? One of the options was this new thing they wanted to do?
35:52
Um hold on black diving is cor hi black diving welcomes a brod house that
36:04
we got this? How you doing this evening? I'm fine? How are
36:07
you? I'm good? Please welcome about how you felt when your head with
36:14
COVID and everything when cobD first hit, Um, I was just like everybody
36:21
else, trying to make sure that I was safe and to chair. And
36:23
then I discovered that I had COVID. And then I realized that my hair
36:28
was coming out. It wasn't because of anything else, because it was a
36:30
great lance. I enjoyed my Yeah, I loved my hand and um yeah
36:34
I had turns and anything else, brave and everything else with it, Like
36:38
COVID pulled my hair out and it was coming out really really bad. So
36:42
I decided to just cut it off. I was gonna be home for while
36:45
we were all home, so I said, you knew what, it doesn't
36:47
matter, I'm gonna be home. Everybody seen you. But then they went
36:52
and I got it done and cut it off, and then I had to
36:54
add a little bit of color too, was just to brighten it up.
36:57
But it wasn't like a chemical color or anything like. It was the rent
37:00
and I've been trying. So he didn't really bother me as much and it
37:05
started to go a little bit. But then I said, you know what,
37:07
I feel so free. I feel like nothing is on my head that's
37:12
weighing me down. And I was a here, you can just wait.
37:16
And I was able to sleep on my hair, touching my tailo, feeling
37:22
myself and I just got a headache from braids or or the weaving too tight
37:30
while in Washington when I wanted to wash it or whatever I wanted to do
37:36
with with whatever I wanted to do with it, and it just felt don't
37:39
come from them. But I'm gonna tell you, I do wear my words,
37:43
every color, every shout. That's what I just don't feel like yelling
37:45
with the natural part. And that's the versatile part of the whole thing.
37:47
With natural hair, you can still throw away going when you want to,
37:52
You can still do other things with it. People say that natural hair is
37:57
not good here. If you can do anything you want, listen, and
38:00
that's the best here exactly. But okay, so why is European natural hair
38:06
good hair, and I is in just my curR. My hair is curly.
38:10
They just tight curls. You know, why is my hair and I
38:14
classified as as good hair? You know, I don't understand why so many
38:21
people and so many cultures not just us, and then we beat ourselves up.
38:25
You know, I really, really really suggest for anyone who's struggling,
38:31
maybe you should try a little mirror work. Look in the mirror, because
38:36
nobody's gonna think you as beautiful as you. So I don't care if you
38:39
got moles all over your face. I'm dead. I'm gorgeous, and I
38:44
don't care what anybody else things. And that's where you need to be,
38:47
whether you have your natural hair or you have it in a protective style,
38:52
or you have on a wig. I like my wigs because I'm not gonna
38:55
put these chemicals on my hair. But I like wearing the rainbow, and
39:00
I wear every color of the rainbow because that's my personality. That's what I
39:06
choose to do. But it's not a dislike for my own natural hair.
39:13
You know. It just come to the point that sometimes I on from like
39:15
Garnett, I get home, I can take it off like my hair breeze
39:17
at my south wings um and the winds of time. I don't have to
39:21
wear out those hats everybody's wearing that will take out your hair. And sometimes
39:24
uh my wing is my hat? Yeah, be sweating. I want to
39:34
and I sometimes I can want Lady, I had on um black and burgony
39:38
today and I had on my burgling rings. That's right, I'll be blown
39:44
next day. I want to be a Bruna and I and once with especial
39:47
for me with the winds. When I go in and I go to a
39:50
certain weak score, I can pick out the short styles if I want you
39:53
and I love it. Compliment me. My own hair definitely compliments me.
39:58
But I can do it currently, I can doing straight. I'm feeling comfortable.
40:02
As far as natural here. I think there was the only people that
40:06
decided that natural here was not good here. And well because you know others
40:14
were saying, oh nappy here, they made it an ugly thing where I
40:20
think nappy here as a compliment. You know. Look, but I'm once
40:25
again, I'm different. You know, I embraced my naturalness years ago.
40:31
Other coaches is always touching out here wanted Yeah, what is that about?
40:38
Like like like like you at the zoo and you want to touch one of
40:42
the animals, Can I can I touch your brains? No, go to
40:46
the store and touch on the brain that's on the way. It's a brain.
40:52
What the hell? It's what's the difference. I think it's so special
40:58
with us because it come with different grains, like we have the rains of
41:06
crout. It's the same thing with out here because we have so many different
41:09
grains and levels to our hair that it was amazing to these other eyes.
41:17
Yes, you know, I enjoy it. I enjoy everything about it.
41:22
You know. I this with me and my daughters. We all did natural
41:28
hair one year and they were surprised when I came home and it was all
41:31
off and he was like, no, that's the way. I said.
41:32
No, I actually cut it off. And my friend was even shocked when
41:37
they saw it. Said no, miney have no fool with natural hair.
41:40
I So we was going the b during the time natural hair. But it's
41:45
just something that I like, I enjoy and I'm just gonna I hit I've
41:51
continue with it until like you're trying to. I told them from maybe not
41:54
the first day next year, this year and next year I'm gonna do something
41:58
totally different, and I wanted to pass myself. I can put my hair.
42:01
I'm not sure exactly what I'm gonna do with it for me different.
42:06
So your question for you, ladies, I have a question for you ladies.
42:09
Have you ever had someone touch your hair or asked to touch your hair
42:14
and say, oh wow, it's so sore, like you was expecting knives
42:21
and needles. Well, well, my daughter touches my hair a lot because
42:27
she does here and she does my hair or what I do. I've learned
42:30
to do the risk and the rist is. When I see them start in
42:32
their approach, I grabbed them by the risk, you know, from where
42:37
their rist is, and I give them the eye and I can keep it
42:38
moving. You don't touch me without an invitation. And then, but if
42:45
you don't get an inter patience, don't touch and don't ask, because if
42:51
I wanted you to, I invite you. That's right ahead. We were
42:57
born with natural hair. Europeans won't allow us to embrace our natural state.
43:01
What do you guys think of that comment? We were born with natural hair,
43:06
Europeans won't allow us to embrace our natural state. Well, I don't
43:14
think anybody have a license phone. What they're gonna allowing me to do or
43:16
allow me not to do, that's just huoments talk. And let's field that
43:20
control that others want to have over the individual. And I won't give an
43:23
anybody that control. I won't even acknowledge the statement to tell you the truth
43:28
because I'm being honest. I think they're saving and beneath. So I'm just
43:31
gonna let that person marinate with that. And okay, all right, odg
43:39
wait, one more question. I'm sorry, black gammon. What do you
43:43
feel about and I know, I mean this is a this is excuse me,
43:47
a sky, the dreads, the dread box and all of that stuff.
43:52
What do y'all feel about the European that they is straight but they are
43:57
trying to knot it up or they needed added to make it look like dreadlocks?
44:00
M h. I mean, what do y'all feel about that? Because
44:04
that's that's a that's a culture in itself. I think it's a religious like
44:08
I know now it's a it's a hair style. Everybody's wanted dread locks,
44:13
but I know I don't know the meaning actually behind it. I know dreadlocks
44:17
has you know spiritual meanings and different meanings, um rosters and all that stuff.
44:23
What do you feel about you know the Europeans, you know they here
44:28
does not get kinky. It is strange and they're trying to mad it up
44:32
to make it look like dread licks. Well I don't. I think it
44:37
goes hand in hand because there was times when we wanted I was straight,
44:42
we wanted very, we wanted to wouldn't environment because we did it? Why
44:47
not? I don't. I wouldn't look at a person is um of another
44:52
culture, and I feel it they're hearing right that they think it's difficult and
44:57
were beautiful on them, so they want to try and they want to do
44:59
it. I don't have to thing negative to say about it, because there's
45:01
kinds where we still buy the extensions and we add certain textures two hours or
45:07
why is it just one sideay where we can do it and it's on.
45:10
But just go to Africa. They're gonna see some people who are born and
45:15
raised in Africa who may appear to look like there are from another culture,
45:21
but they're Africa. Yes, here babies, So I just you know,
45:25
it's it's just I think it's the ignorance of some people. They won't accept
45:30
everything. People think that it's supposed to be like that, and it doesn't
45:36
have to be like that. Mhm. It's quote free will. We all
45:39
have the ready to do whatever we want. What's one us and there's no
45:45
So I've constantly heard, oh, well, why does this Caucasian person have
45:50
braids? But I mean braids started in the Dutch, it started with Caucasians.
45:53
Everybody does braids, Vikings did braids. Braids is not a cultural thing.
45:59
It's a here style, you know. So nobody is copying us or
46:02
a biting us. Maybe the different designs might be doing it, but if
46:08
they're capable and they can afford to get it done, why not. You
46:13
know, I I'm in an agreement with what the black linemen you know,
46:19
be you do? You you know, it's a free it's a free country
46:28
because you know us as a people, it's you know, it's like a
46:32
double standard. You know, it's like, oh, they because I've seen
46:37
them. But that was that was that was a good answer. But um,
46:40
black you falling in and sharing, um your views on this topic,
46:46
because that was the this was like, really it hit home for me,
46:52
Really it didn't because I never really thought about by here because I really I
46:59
want to do or kind of experiments since I was but being it, I
47:04
had to do it now, you know, And look who's calling in,
47:08
my very own the person that y'all want to speak to morize it. We're
47:13
gonna ask, can we ask? Yes, let's ask, ladies. I
47:17
love your energy so much for tuning in and being part of the show.
47:24
You're welcome. Yeah, that's hilarious. I really appreciate everyone who's watching,
47:37
everyone who's calling in and participating, because to me, this is like a
47:42
very very big subject because a lot of people do, and it's not just
47:46
females, men as well define their attractiveness by their hair, you know,
47:53
just the same way when men start losing their hair, you know, they
47:59
go through a depression and people say it's a midlife crisis and it's all this
48:04
other stuff. No, they're losing something they just they once had a bunch
48:07
of and now they're going ball. They might look good boy, but they
48:10
still had to come to terms. So we all face it, whether it's
48:15
a gender, whether it's a culture. You know, we're more one of
48:22
the our um spectators said, we're more than our hair and It's true.
48:27
We are more so once you start annoying it within yourself, everybody you know
48:32
will will be a lot better and there will be a lot less you know,
48:37
depression, because I know people who down straight out we got competing depressed
48:44
because they lost their hair. All right, Bob, okay, by no,
48:51
he will not get on. He was like, oh no, no,
48:52
no, no, no they me apart. No why he wouldn't get
48:57
on? What happens to big same pay though? What happened? What what
49:02
happened? A little big brother? He said? He said, I forgot
49:06
you. I love you, Brad, I'm off, he said, a
49:14
new one. I said, hey, nobody gonna rip you. And he
49:19
said, yeah, okay, but I told to later I love you goodbye.
49:23
That is hilarious. He said, no, no, no, now
49:29
we will not be do we get so het? And you're a real fast
49:36
too, because you know, usually you take a second to get corpure.
49:38
Yes, he was like, no, he was like, I forgot you.
49:42
Was on the video tell everybody God bless my love him and hung up
49:45
the pall that one. Yeah it is a mess, but he's learning and
49:52
please, you know. And she gets very upset because she feels like,
49:57
I'm defending her either, that's my sister. But he grew up incarcerated,
50:01
so he doesn't know a lot of a lot of nothing. So until the
50:07
experience presents themselves to him, he's not really going to learn. So she's
50:15
gonna have to bear with him in a lot of instances. I mean,
50:17
if you do lose that leg, don't cut his head off, because he's
50:22
not instantly you know, bowing down. You know it because everything to him
50:28
as a culture shop. You know, it's a culture you had. You
50:31
had the opportunity to see a person lose a leg. He's probably never seen
50:37
that, you know. So, But I'm not a person. I'm your
50:40
wife, I'm your better half, I'm your rock, I'm your neck,
50:43
you're the head. No, because he got short comments, he's human,
50:47
yeah, human, and you're human as well, so your feelings are valid.
50:55
Okay, that's right. Erica said he understood that assignment and said,
50:59
no, I'm done. That is the last. Look what was gonna happen?
51:05
He was like, I am not kidding on the radio with those ladies.
51:08
He was gopping. He knew it, and you know, you know,
51:15
I'm queen defender, Like what is on your mind, y'all. No,
51:20
now, we're not doing that. He knows his wife what was on
51:22
his mind saying that he know, he know, he know I was gonna
51:27
he was gonna get eight up. But they did know he was gonna get
51:30
eight up. Everybody would have been calling like Bibe, call on. So
51:38
I'm looking forward to so many more shows, ladies. I want to thank
51:43
you all for showing us. Wait wait, wait, wait before you think
51:45
them, I just want to throw the Brown Girl to watch Sydney Barber.
51:54
Watch the Brown Girl to watch Sydney Barber. You guys look her up.
52:00
She is the first African American female brigade brigade brigade commander for the US Naval
52:09
Academy, like the first to ever graduate in that position, female doing it.
52:16
So we're doing big things even for our country. Yes, yes,
52:22
we are, Yes, we are. Yes. Every every month we're gonna
52:24
have the female to watch. We also got the Brown Girl to watch,
52:29
sorry, the girl to watch. We're gonna also have the other segment is
52:34
I forgot im? Sorry? The Brown Girl in history, Brown Girl in
52:37
History? And what else? Segment? Different segments are gonna pop up all
52:43
over the place, But let please please, please please, If you are
52:46
a small business and you are interested in taking over and sponsoring one of our
52:53
segments, please reach out to us. What's that number again? Obg all
52:59
one set got you and it's in the chat as well, and it's on
53:06
a book a dream dit org. Yes, and while you're thinking the people,
53:16
or after you think the people, or before you think the people,
53:20
please let everybody know where you want to be at in May doing a book
53:27
signing launching. Yes, okay, not defined by my address. It's the
53:35
late it's my latest book. It's a series. It's my first series.
53:38
Actually it's called I'm not defined by my address and it's actually the love story
53:43
of me and my husband how we met. Yes, yes, that that's
53:46
that UM. And if you're interested and you did you tell them to be
53:51
to be UM. If you want us to promote you UM through a commercial
53:54
on our show, sponsor us, please give us a call at nine one
54:00
four four one seven nine one nine six, or you could go to our
54:05
website, which is a book a dream dot org. Tomorrow the packages will
54:09
be up because every package, no budget is too small or too large for
54:15
us, and packages include you will be you will have an ad on the
54:20
website. I have a tramp. We all have a tremendous following. But
54:23
we will also have a commercial for you and we will be playing it throughout
54:28
the month. Because you are on, you will be hosting our segment and
54:34
we also will have the commercial commercial playing on the segment Live with Us.
54:38
It'll be the commercial of the month for our show. And again if you
54:43
want to be a part of that, it's area called nine one four four
54:46
one seven nine one nine six and the website is a book a dream dot
54:52
org or one word and or lowercase and it'll be live tomorrow. How you
54:59
can have one of the advertisement. Also on May twentieth, me and Lady
55:07
T will be at the bowling party. What's the address please? Okay,
55:10
So we're gonna do it. We're gonna switch this up a little bit.
55:14
The OBG will be doing herb book signing and I will be launching the Lady
55:20
T collection at Mark and DJ many Strong's Bowling Party at thunder Lanes on May
55:29
twentieth from eight to eleven at fifty seven thirty cast to Avenue and Pa and
55:34
it's gonna be many vendors. You need to get your tickets say thirty dollars
55:38
a piece. You know you're gonna hit up mister Mark five at two one
55:44
five six one seven five five five eight. Meet the vendors, meet so
55:50
many small businesses. Network your business, come join, have fun. Meet
55:54
what the Pamela Jay Get one of her sign books because I'm telling you they're
55:58
gonna be worth something. You better get it. Get it early. We
56:01
were gonna be soon. O. Yes, this summer Summus, this Sammu
56:10
summer sammer, I am proud of announced that Door Film, a book in
56:16
Dream production will have our first short film falsely accused. Um, it'll be
56:23
live in PA. It's gonna be a red Croper event, a networking event,
56:30
so you're gonna keep hearing about it. Um you see the commercials also
56:34
in collaboration with the Door Films. Yes, so it's going to be a
56:38
very big event. Also, were also going to be in the studio doing
56:43
the short teaser of an audio book for it, so the teaser will be
56:47
out before the actual short film. So please over to that. It's gonna
56:52
be sure you follow us because that that that premiere is a VIPA event yemited
57:00
tickets, limited seating, So if you want to be down, you must
57:05
follow us. You gotta state, you gotta go and join the email lists
57:08
at a book a dream dot org. You need to follow the crew.
57:14
You need to follow Lady T. You need to follow the obg Well she
57:17
Facebook famous. You need to just watch out what she does. You know,
57:22
I love it, It's hilarious. Follow just because you want to.
57:24
You don't want to miss that event that's gonna be big. Not only that,
57:29
guys, one more thing um that I'm doing that the brown gray hashtagre
57:32
got this. I have a new nonprofit called Pink Sister Journey and nasturally bring
57:42
awareness to breast cancer. And also on May first, I'm asking everybody.
57:45
I'm asking two hundred people to donate one dollar. You donate, the one
57:49
dollar goes to the fight for helping early detection of breast cancer. Also you
57:58
get if you donate the one doll because the button will be available. Or
58:00
May first, because this is the event, because I'm doing six a half
58:04
to clock two hundred miles but steps like walking steps, but as a dollar,
58:09
I'm asking two hundred people to donate just one dollar, you get the
58:13
lottery ticket. And on May twentieth, I will be pulling that lottery ticket
58:17
for the basket. The basket is a complete collection of all of my catalog
58:23
every book that I have ever written, every book that I have ever collapsed
58:27
because I collapsed on the several books with My Home Girl or the Angel the
58:34
Time and Smith. I've collaborated several books for her, my own books,
58:38
my journal books, my merchandise, the Brown Girl Square merchandise. The basket
58:45
is worth at least seven hundred dollars and you can get a chance to win
58:47
it for just one dollar. And how did they get that? How did
58:52
they do that? Tomorrow as of or May first, the event starts,
58:58
I need um two hundred people to donate one dollar um because I'm trying to
59:04
how do they donate? Is what I'm asking? Or when you press on
59:07
the when you go on the website, website a book of dream dot org.
59:14
Like I said, it'll be first, He'll be up I May first,
59:19
and it'll say the Pink Sister Journey and you press you but and you
59:22
going there, You're gonna and you know, donate your dollar. Each dollar
59:25
you donate get you a lottery ticket and I'm gonna write your name on it
59:30
and it's gonna be live on Facebook when I draw the the ticket out to
59:35
see who wins the big basket of merchandise. I'm winning, I'm winning,
59:40
I'm winning. I'm getting my ticket. Y'all getting your ticket. Y'all gotta
59:45
get your ticket because I want that collection. I'm telling you it's gonna be
59:49
worth money. Y'all better get it. And also it's going to a great
59:52
cause early detection, because if it wasn't for the early detection of myself when
59:57
they found the two tumors, I was at stage one, so thank god
1:00:00
I did go have my mamogram. And that's it for our show. Ladies,
1:00:05
Oh my goodness, please get your mamograms. Yeah, Black Diamond,
1:00:13
Lisa, everybody to this Shy Smith Trees, the Trees or all of you
1:00:20
ladies at Trump and today, thank you for coming to our show. We
1:00:24
love God, Blast keep dreaming, and it's thank you for all of your
1:00:31
great, your great work that you do. And you could close us out
1:00:36
with the song I love you guys, God Blast take kid. I'll see
1:00:39
you yet at the end of May. Yay dreaming, keep dreaming, guys.
1:01:00
Mm hmm. Girl of the Panage. The Brown Message a message alive, tell,