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#55 Holding On and Letting Go: Relationship Shifts in College · College Is Fine, Everything's Fine

Episode Draft[00:00:00] I'm Dr. Sarah Olivo and I'm Dr. Liz Seidler and you're listening to College is Fine. Everything's fine.[00:00:13] Sarah: All right, I just saw you take that big gulp of coffee and you should know that I lived on coffee yesterday. I don't think I had one drop of water unless it was the water that was holding the coffee stuff.[00:00:24] Liz: I'm really trying, one of my New Year's resolutions, which I tend not to make or [00:00:30] keep, is not letting the first thing that goes into my mouth in the morning to be coffee, but it's a really hard sell, water, you[00:00:36] Sarah: Why do you hate yourself? I need coffee to go get my coffee. [00:00:39] Liz: I know.[00:00:40] Sarah: even wait. Anyway, we both look, I think, pretty caffeinated right now. So that's good. And this was an episode that we had so much fun doing and had , the real generosity of these girls time on their Thanksgiving break, which, I have to say, thank you.Thank you. We really appreciated them. And you guys, if you're [00:01:00] listening, hopefully you are to your own advice, that we really appreciated that time. [00:01:05] Liz: Of effort. We had moving cars, multiple locations, it was a real team approach,[00:01:12] Sarah: Yep.[00:01:13] Liz: happy that they were willing to get this in before they celebrated.[00:01:17] Sarah: And with that in mind, we should also say there's going to be some funky audio here. , this is also the first podcast I've done from a hospital waiting room because I was,[00:01:28] Liz: I[00:01:28] Sarah: so you might.[00:01:29] Liz: [00:01:30] Yes,[00:01:37] Sarah: you might hear occasionally some, random, beeps and bloops in the background.So listen, we try to, we're winging it sometimes here. And so thank you for being a little patient with the audio. [00:01:49] Liz: And Sarah's okay. No need to worry about her. [00:01:52] Sarah: Great.[00:01:53] Liz: but it really just shows her devotion. So tune in today, we're going to be talking about, , how your relationship can [00:02:00] change with your family when you go to college [00:02:03] Sarah: I would say some friends in your community, too, we kind of got, we widened the spectrum a little bit, just changing relationships, although we did focus mostly on the parents here, which I think makes sense.[00:02:14] Liz: And I think it's a topic that a lot of families, college students, high school students, like they don't really think about, you kind of just get plopped in a different place and assume that. Everything's going to be the same to a certain extent in terms of your relationships, but there's a lot of [00:02:30] changes that can happen.[00:02:31] Sarah: We heard some of this here, too, like, Some people thought things are going to be the same and some people wanted things to be different. Well, other parts of the family wanted things to be the same. , and so you're going to hear us every now and then plop our questions in just to anchor what this conversation was aboutthis was a topic that was requested by several people. And so we're happy to bring it to you today.<h1>[00:02:45] Marker - Question 1 - Surprises?</h1>[00:02:45] Liz: so we entered the conversation talking to the ladies about what surprises they've noticed that came up in the changes in their relationship.So for example, maybe managing expectations around how independent they were going to be [00:03:00] in college, how often, let's say, they were going to communicate or share information about what their experience was like. Maybe parents holding on too tight, treating them as if they were still under the household and 16.Um, Or some parents may be kind of letting go and expecting you to be a full fledged adult. Um, and just in general, like how to navigate communication, uh, usually via phone, which maybe some family members don't have a lot of practice in. Well, I think it was just [00:03:30] kind of interesting, um, with me in the way that I was expecting more independence and freedom and kind of having a big change from high school going into college. But it seems as though my parents had a somewhat of a different, um. A view of what that was going to look like, um, where I feel like it was harder for them to maybe sometimes let off the reins.And even me still being a junior in college, I still find that kind of tricky at times. Um, so yes, while I love being home, [00:04:00] there's also some comfort being at school and kind of being able to, you know, practice being an adult and being confident in my capabilities behind that. I think it's a good one idea.I think of how to navigate the independence that comes with living away from home and being in college, where sometimes parents are holding on too tight or have different expectations of what freedom looks like at college. Anyone else have a similar experience? And [00:04:30] when I go home, something that I've noticed now since being a junior is that not much has changed, which is great. It's good in some ways and then negative in other ways because, um, I think I have become more mature over time in how I handle certain situations in regards to fights or things like that.And then it's a tricky thing to navigate when other people have not made [00:05:00] similar progress.Got it. Yeah. I think that, um, just communication in general, maybe we could talk about that. Like, did you, when you came to college, like, did you have any expectations or conversations with your parents about, you know, how often they wanted to hear from you, how much, like, they wanted to know what you were doing, your grades.Did you have any expectations or conversations with them about what that would look like?Um, I mean, with my parents, we kind of decided on like a weekly FaceTime call, just like Sundays, [00:05:30] Mondays, to kind of recap the week, um, and just kind of check in, see what they've been up to, what I've been up to, but, I mean, besides that, not, not much, but also my, my mom and I basically text like every day, I would say for me, um, I realized that Well, in the beginning, and this is actually still the way it is, but I'm very close with my mom, so we FaceTime every single day, and sometimes that's, um, a lot, but I enjoy it, and then, uh, but me and my dad are not as close, so I had to be the one to [00:06:00] initiate, like, a weekly phone call with him.So I wasn't really expecting to have to be the one to do that. But I think that has kind of helped with our relationship. But it goes back to the whole thing with boundaries, where during high school, like, obviously I would talk to my parents every day, but now, it's harder to explain that sometimes you can't always do that.I'd say that like, my parents are really bad at communicating, especially their expectations. [00:06:30] And my, I think my mom would say like, she wanted me to text her all the time and like update her on my life completely, you know, like non stop every moment. Um, but like that was never communicated to me. It was more just like, you should want to talk to me all the time because like, I'm your best friend, you're my best friend.Like. You just want to talk to me and when that didn't happen she got really hurt and I think that that's been a big, a big [00:07:00] problem. Just no expectations communicated and then hurt because you didn't put in the effort that you didn't know what that I didn't know wanted to be put in. <h1>[00:07:09] Question 2: Any "middle path" that's felt doable? - They discussed differing expectations around school work and social lives</h1>[00:07:09] Sarah: We next heard a lot more about expectations that people had around, or deferring expectations, I think, around social lives, commitment to schoolwork, et cetera. So let's hear what they had to say.I think that was very clear with my parents that I was not going to take college as seriously as I took high school, which is kind of backwards, [00:07:30] I think, but I just like worked myself to death in, in high school and middle school. I just like worked myself to death in high school and I told them I was not going to do that.It definitely, the expectation changed a lot. For me, I would say, um, kind of the bigger middle ground was like my parents expectation of, Who I was hanging around, how many people, like how many friends I started to make, um, and them like really wanting to be involved with that or saying like, oh like, um, you know, you should expand your circle and, and start getting out there.And I'm like, I'm very happy [00:08:00] with, with like my two really close friends that I made. And then, um, I did end up joining like a social club, and through that, I was able to, you know, network and find like a whole group of people that I just love to surround myself around now.But at the time, especially freshman, sophomore year, I'm like, can you just kind of let me make the friends that, that I've made and continue on and grow through those relationships? Cause I, I mean, I've found so much joy and peace and. And just love through those, so I felt [00:08:30] like I didn't need more, but then of course, it felt like when I did start making friends, all of a sudden they were like, it was more of an expectation, like, okay, yeah, you know, they didn't really celebrate it with me like I thought they were.It was more of like, oh yeah, finally, you're out there making connections. Now that I'm here, um, we've kind of both have the same expectations for what, I want to do and what makes me happy. Yes, I think, one of the things that I've learned about communication with my [00:09:00] parents is that because we're not on the same level of communication, there's just certain things that I've had to decide for myself that I'm going to move forward with, without them.Telling them, I guess, but an example would be, um, with the grades, like my whole life, there was a lot of pressure to have like a 4. 0 GPA and I mean, sometimes, I mean, yeah, sometimes I get bad grades, but I don't, I just don't tell my parents. So that's one of those things that I've just decided, even though there hasn't been communication around it, or I'm like, there's no need for me to [00:09:30] discuss this with my parents anymore.And I kind of just realized there's certain decisions I have to make by myself, so that's kind of the reason. I don't know if that's like what is considered a middle ground, but for me, it feels like a middle ground in my head because I think I've also had a lot of people pleasing tendencies with my parents to just constantly, like, make them happy and let them know certain things whenever they wanted, but I guess [00:10:00] it's more a middle ground for me.It's just setting boundaries with myself.And I don't know if there were any speed bumps that came from you setting that boundary. but making independent decisions, are things sometimes that I think College students struggle their struggle, you know, with either leaning on their parents too much.Yeah, when you have a parent who might be holding on too tight to the ways they had communicated with you before the access to information they had from you before And you're saying [00:10:30] like i'm ready to let go that that kind of gap between experience Expectations tends to be where we see the most conflict or the most kind of internal turmoil. And so oftentimes trying to figure out like making this decision based on your own values.I mean, usually college is only four years. I'd say the first two years, we're learning all of those things. Like, learning what your expectations are, getting into the groove. I think it's just an adjustment period and it's for you and your parents., [00:11:00] do you think that that two year adjustment period is essential, or do you feel like there were things that you could have done ahead of time that may be like, Oh, if I had, If I had a crystal ball and I could have seen this coming, we could have gotten ahead of this more quickly than that two years.<h1>[00:11:16] Two-year adjustment period - didn't *have* to be two years</h1>Oh, yes. I think it could have gone a lot smoother, but we had to learn so much , just like learning boundaries, of course, it's like a hot button term, but that's how it feels. You know, that's how it seems. , and like, it is a give and take, like you said.[00:11:30] So, , I think that communication could have helped that adjustment period be a lot less, but that wasn't there because it didn't know that it needed to be there.<h1>[00:11:37] Question 3: Finances - tension about parents paying for college and expecting information and access in return</h1>[00:11:37] Liz: Okay, the next topic we get into, which I think comes up a lot, is the tension regarding Parents paying for college, usually, and expecting information, guidance, or having access to information in return. [00:11:53] Sarah: This felt like a, a rough one, right? Sort of feeling like money is power. Money means you have control. And [00:12:00] that's, that's a hard one to navigate.[00:12:02] Liz: right. So let's, let's hear what their experience has been like so far with that. Oh yeah, I feel like for me, because my, my tuition is basically fully being paid by, by my parents. Um, I'm not expected to really pay, you know, towards my education part. But, I definitely think I've heard that used as like, well, we're paying for your college so you should be grateful, or you should, you know.Make sure that you're doing this, you know, um, checking in often and, and letting us be a part of it. And I'm like, well, yes, thank [00:12:30] you for paying for my college. But at the same time, that was always something growing up that, that was going to happen no matter what, you know, they want me to get an education and I want to as well.But if anything, I would say a big part was my parents always being like, you know, you're going to go to college. You're going to get a degree and make sure that you get a good career so you can one day support yourself, support your family, you know, XYZ. So I feel like that's definitely sometimes used against me and I'm like, well, you guys, you know, we're going to send me to [00:13:00] college of whether or not I wanted to kind of a thing I would say of like, well, you know, thank you for paying for my college, but that doesn't mean that I owe you.An explanation for every single thing that's happening. . I would completely agree that like, there is the expectation of like, I'm paying for your life, says I still need to be a part of it. And, uh, not only do I want to be a part of it, like I want to have a say in it.I've definitely, definitely heard that from my parents. Um, and I think that like, whenever. Money is used as a controlling tactic. It just doesn't work. [00:13:30] You know, can't form a connection over the power someone has over you. And unfortunately I think that that's what it's used at as, as a lot of times, I think, cause there's a line of being like, yes, I'm very grateful that you're paying for my school and I will talk to you and I love you and I appreciate you and I will let you into my life because that matters.And like, we have like mutual respect that you can't control it just because you provide financially for me. That's definitely something we've had, and I've had to navigate with my parents, too. Not fun. Because you feel bad. Not everything is about money.<h1>[00:13:58] Note: Discusses money but in terms of values, shifting values</h1>The thing for me that I realized [00:14:00] about money is I viewed it in a very, like, the exact way that my dad views it. And it's just because he grew up poor, so he's very, like, conscientious about saving money all the time. So, freshman year, I was extremely stingy.And it would create so much panic in me whenever I had to spend money because I'm like, Oh my god, I'm gonna Like, we waste all of it, and I don't think this is smart, and, but I think also being away has helped me to look at money in a different way as well, [00:14:30] where I'm like, it is okay to spend some time and to use it for fun things, as long as I still keep trying to save it.So, that's what I thought of when you guys brought up the money thing. Because I think that's the main thing for me is my perspective on money that has been shaped by my parents. And then I've had to try to learn to make it a more flexible. Perspective. <h1>[00:14:51] Q4 - Values</h1>[00:14:51] Sarah: The next thing, and this is something, Liz, I think you and I probably talk about a lot with the clients that we see, which is starting to define the [00:15:00] values that you hold, what feels the same when you were in high school and at home, and what feels a little bit different. I think what we heard was maybe there are some sort of messages and values that you took for granted at home that you're starting to question now and that can cause a little bit of tension.Yeah. When you were just saying that part of young adulthood is figuring out your values and like what aspects of your family's values do you want to keep right where you want to [00:15:30] be.You stole my line. You stole my line.Let the record show that Liz and I share a brain. Yes. We do. A hundred percent. Yeah. And that, you know, then it's an opportunity to be flexible and maybe learn more about yourself and your own values. And I think sometimes there's like this values clash that can happen as young adults are trying to figure out themselves, um, where they might let go of some of the values of their family or their parents and might have different [00:16:00] beliefs or, you know, an example that comes up and then speak to the, this has happened.Was, um, choosing a major for a lot of my college students is really challenging because their parents might have a lot of opinions regarding, particularly, I think what you were speaking about, like financial security, like what occupations would lead to you being able to be financially independent and secure later in life, . So can you think of any examples where there was like this clash in values or as you've kind of gotten through this,  These years of college so far that [00:16:30] you've noticed that your values have changed from your parents and it's been tricky waters.for me, I, I definitely think that, touching on the, um, major part, I, I feel like, yes. I love what I'm doing. I'm, you know, exercise science. And I was an athlete all throughout middle school, high school. So thankfully I have happened to find something that I'm finding myself to be very passionate about.But in a perfect world, I would love to go into the arts and just be an artist and do just anything I, I love. [00:17:00] Just every kind of medium of art. Um, and my mom actually is probably more supportive of that. She's told me that, you know, if that's what you want to do, pursue it. And do it. But my dad's more of the money guy that's thinking financially and, you know, thinking of the phrase starving artist.And I know that he has the best intentions for me. So he doesn't want me to struggle in the future with that. But if I could have. Really chosen what to do. It would have definitely been going into the arts. Um, but also values [00:17:30] wise growing up, I went to a very, very small private Christian school. I was raised Christian.Um, and definitely everyone would always say, yeah, we're kind of in a bubble in the high school I went to. And it was also a K through 12. So I was there from second grade to graduation. So there wasn't much else that I was aware of outside of. My school and my friends and my parents and my churches. going to university, there's People from all around the [00:18:00] world, even at Art Week, international students, so many people from different states, coming together with different beliefs, different backgrounds.And it was even just hearing other people's perspectives on life. It's like, Oh, I, I didn't even know I could think that way, or I didn't even know that was an option. And I feel like with me trying to navigate that and see what I believe and what I want to value in my life, can be a little different from my parents.And I think that's been somewhat of a struggle. Having the conversations we used to, and I'm like, well, now I kind of [00:18:30] don't think that way anymore. And then they're kind of like caught off guard.Like, oh. You know, you would have responded differently two years ago, or in a way that's more in line with our beliefs. And I'm like, well, you know, three years a lot can change, and you can have a lot of conversations. So, I think that's more my big thing with values.for me, this, I suppose, is interesting in a, it's both positive and negative, but a big value of mine. Parents and my mom is to always be kind and to always [00:19:00] just include other people and ensure that everyone feels cared for. So that was like a big value of mine, stepping into college and it still is, but something that I've also realized with that is how much it affected me in the way that I was always putting myself on the backburn and not prioritizing myself for always trying to put Other people's needs before mine, and of course I still always try to be kind.Um, but now I also realize too that you can be kind to [00:19:30] yourself as well, and it doesn't need to be like a one or the other. I do think that that is something that is important. That has impacted me a lot, but at least it's still in a good way, I guess. You bring up something that's so important, and I love that you've learned that on your own, and the idea behind values is there's not one that's good or bad, and oftentimes people can hold two values that are in conflict, and so one of the ways that Liz and I would talk about values is that they, you have to think of them on a [00:20:00] sphere, and so Liz, you kind of turn towards the value of kindness.That might be something where you can't have that and also have a value of self advocacy. Um, and standing up for yourself or setting boundaries. And, you know, so there's, there's a lot of ways that you can hold one and recognize that the sphere sometimes needs to turn and you need to prioritize or act on another value system that's equally as quote unquote good as [00:20:30] kindness, because You've, I've said it before, even on this podcast, you don't want to set yourself on fire to keep others warm.And oftentimes if kindness is the only value that push to the front, then that you can end up really having a lot of internal suffering or going well past your own sort of natural boundaries.I try to think about something that, I mean, I agree to think the values change and. That is like a primary time in college when they [00:21:00] change and then that paired with you not talking to your parents as much and all of a sudden their kids, you know, I don't know my kid anymore. And it's like, well, like you have responsibility in that, like I have responsibility in that, but like, I, And I'm not going to talk to my parents as much.They don't know me as well. And then I'm so hurt and shocked when they, when they don't know me as well, but I'm the one that didn't talk to them half the time. So it is definitely like, there's the pros and cons of that.What I like that you said about that is that it can go both [00:21:30] ways. If, if I'm choosing to not speak to my parents as often, they're not getting to know me as well, then at the same time, there's a consequence to that, which is that they won't get to know me as well, and they're going to see perhaps big changes if I'm only kind of checking in or seeing them, you know, For chunks of time, every six months in the meantime, you guys have, you know, three, four, five, six, however long people are in college, but you have all these lights of new information and new friends and new situations.And so it makes complete sense. <h1>[00:21:58] Question 5: Any tips for parents on what would help with communication / these changes?</h1>[00:21:58] Liz: and of course we [00:22:00] asked them now a little bit about what tips would you have for parents or college students on what would help with these changes, how to navigate and communicate more effectively. I at least think for me, um, kind of backing up, maybe your values is very important because I feel a lot of the times growing up, you know, as a kid, it's just. It's a lot easier to accept like what you're supposed to believe and be like, yeah, that sounds right to me. But I feel like as we're now in college and a lot of times when people are expressing their beliefs, they back it up with a reason.I believe this because of this, this and [00:22:30] this that I saw through my own experience, through research, through facts, through statistics, whatever it is. Um, whereas I feel like my parents may have had a harder transition of being like, oh, she. Has kind of a critical mind now and she wants to know why we believe this and and why that could benefit her in my life So I think if parents were able to kind of explain to the child like how this is through their eyes I you know see this Benefiting you in this way, and if you continue to value [00:23:00] this or have this belief then this will carry you through life easier.So I feel like at least for me, that would make me feel better. If sometimes they gave me a reason as to why I should believe that. And I also think I'm more likely to accept what they're saying and actually take into account like, okay, yeah, that might actually benefit me in my adult life. <h1>[00:23:21] Question 6: Community</h1>[00:23:21] Sarah: and last but not least, it's not just parent relationships that tend to change. A lot of times it's Friendships, friend groups, your [00:23:30] overall community and what it's like to be home in a place where maybe your town or your former school group, just the people you would hang out with has a different way of being and you've been really used to that and now suddenly it's like, oh, there's this whole new world out there that you didn't even realize existed.And you don't even have to be in a new place. Sometimes just going from your home and one section to a campus and a different section of even your own town, we were able to [00:24:00] see can shift a lot and opening up the world for you in a new way. And what comes with that?Um, I would, yeah, I think my community changed. pretty drastically. I went into college with one friend and since then we've not been as close, but like I still see her all the time. I think that we both have like definitely changed. it is, it's just weird. Like you are just uprooted kind of, even if, I mean, I'm from the same town that I go to school in and, um, that has been like, it was supposed to be, I guess, not that big of a change is like [00:24:30] why you stay in the same town that you grew up in and you go to school in, but it has been a Completely.different, um, environment and change. And it just matters like who you, who you spend time around. I could find a community that is just like the one that I grew up in, but I like didn't, and that's for the best, I think, in my opinion, Obviously, you're not at home anymore, you're not around your parents anymore, so your environment just changed completely.And that was the hardest thing, like, that's the reason I started going to therapy when I started going to school. Because I was like, I cannot [00:25:00] adjust well to this at all. Like, all of a sudden, the environment that's curated for me at home is no longer my environment. And that's really hard. And you have to learn to do that by yourself, do that on your own.And it's obviously, it's just a life skill. You have to learn it. Anyway, um, but it was a hard transition and I think it's important for parents to know that they're like how to support their child And that without coddling them and without like judging them and that's just a balance that you choose You choose you sign up for when you have a kidYeah, um, I definitely think for me when I was [00:25:30] picking on a university I was very intentional to try and get something similar to the environment that I grew up in I went to a very small high school, like I mentioned, I graduated with 79 people, and we were all like brothers and sisters at the end of that, especially because I went to school with some of them for over a decade.And so I feel like I got very used to just going through life, just kind of the same every day, you know, school from 7. 45, get out at 3. Go to the after school sports, go to work, you know, and then do it all [00:26:00] again for however many years that was and then so I think Going out to school. I was like, yeah, this is gonna be very similar I'm gonna build the same kind of connections relationships and then it was not at all similar it was the fact that there's so many people coming from So many different backgrounds and, um, places that they grew up in.It was just almost inevitable that I would most definitely not have the same relationships and experiences that I did in, um, kind of grade school. But at the [00:26:30] same time, I think it was for the better. I was able to kind of find what I actually wanted. Enjoyed in my life and what I wanted to see through friendships and what I wanted my expectations to be not only with my parents but with my community so I think that The change at least for my experience was definitely for the better.I feel a lot more fulfilled and Also, I think I realized that a lot of my relationships and friendships that I had in high school were very superficial um, I found that [00:27:00] really our only connection why we're so close is because We were in high school together and it's like, now that we're not, there's that disconnect of like, Oh, you're kind of becoming your own person, your own adult.And I'm kind of becoming my own person. Like, that's okay. We can kind of just distance ourselves now, but still, you know, hold tight to those amazing memories that we share. <h1>[00:27:19] OUTRO</h1>[00:27:19] Liz: All right. So we heard a lot of different perspectives on the changes that can happen in your relationships as you adjust to college. And I know we started this [00:27:30] episode, but we really are grateful, to have three different voices from the same school, from different parts of the country, and hearing the differences in terms of both., the expectations were different in terms of what the changes would look like in their relationships, as well as maybe how they have handled them and navigated them. And I think the common takeaway that they all kind of said was like, this is normal, like change is normal and expecting things to say the [00:28:00] same is likely unrealistic.[00:28:02] Sarah: Yeah, the extremes we see pop up the most at this time when it comes to navigating new relationships with your family is that letting go too soon idea versus holding on too tight idea. If you are feeling like, Oh my gosh, I'm ready to fly. And your parents are still trying to hold on.Well, they might be holding on too tight while you're trying to let go. Appropriately and then there's going to be some tension there because of that difference. And [00:28:30] sometimes people really go to extremes. They're like, I don't need any help. I don't want my parents to have any say or any, any tracking of things.And they can not ask for some of the support they need. They might be trying to let go too soon and then not have some Support they need, , so I think it's important to know , that those extremes, when they're different between you and your family or your community tend to cause a little bit of discomfort, maybe some conflict, maybe some awkwardness. , it doesn't have to be extreme. It just might be like, [00:29:00] wait, this is a new feeling for me and I have to, slowly get used to it. It's like building a new muscle that you haven't had to build before.[00:29:08] Liz: Yeah, and we've talked about in previous episodes with this really, and we've used some of the language, even talking to some of the students that when you notice this tension, it likely is an opportunity for you to see another side in the situation, right? Am I able to push towards independence while also lean on others for support and guidance, [00:29:30] that we want to really acknowledge both of those sides.Can I, you know, one, like pay attention to my relationships in college and making new friendships while also nurturing my relationships at home.[00:29:41] Sarah: I have a metaphor that I sometimes use, um, that it might be kind of gross. I can't even remember if I've picked it up before. I'm sort of like, you know, you think about like a snake shedding its skin, right? And as it grows, it does have to shed some skin. And that part's going to feel a little weird. [00:30:00] And it's also going to feel really sensitive at first while you're kind of initial.Skin is being shed, but it's sort of like you're also shedding sort of that initial skin and it's, it's part of growth and it's normal for it to feel a little bit different and sensitive at first, but is that gross?[00:30:16] Liz: You know, as someone who really needs to shed some skin, because I feel like a dry lizard currently now in these winter months, I'm all for this.[00:30:29] Sarah: Oh my God. [00:30:30] Yeah. Our next episode on exfoliation and moisturizing.[00:30:37] Liz: Literally and figuratively, I definitely am in favor of this. Thank you to our guests for sharing their stories and their advice. This podcast is for college [00:31:00] students and we want input by college students, so please reach out by text, email, or voice memo to collegesfindpodcastatgmail. com or 929 500 2231. 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