Latest / Freelance Careers with Fexingo: Independent Work, Consulting, and Self-Employment / How a Freelancer Scored a Retainer by Saying No
Transcript
- Lucas: We talk a lot on this show about how to price your work, how to find clients, how to build a niche. But there's a move that sits at the intersection of all three — and it's counterintuitive. Luna: Counterintuitive how? Lucas: It's the idea that sometimes the fastest way to a retainer — the holy grail of recurring income for a freelancer — is to say 'no' to a project. To turn down work. Luna: You're not talking about being difficult just for the sake of it, right? You mean a strategic no. Lucas: Exactly. And I want to anchor this in a real example. There's a freelance graphic designer named Sarah Chen — she's based in Austin, and she'd been doing one-off branding projects for about four years. Good work, decent clients, but the feast or famine cycle was wearing her down. Luna: Classic freelancer pain point. What did she do? Lucas: A mid-sized tech company — I'll call them ByteGrid — reached out for a single project: redesign their pitch deck. It was a five-thousand-dollar job, standard for her. But Sarah had read a book on negotiation that talked about the scarcity principle — the idea that what's rare is valued. So she decided to try something. Luna: She turned down the pitch deck? Lucas: She didn't turn it down outright. She said, 'I appreciate the offer, but I'm actually not taking on one-off projects right now. My focus is on longer-term partnerships where I can really learn the brand and be more effective. If that's something you're open to, I'd love to discuss a retainer arrangement.' Luna: Wow. That is a bold script. How did they respond? Lucas: They came back two days later and asked what a retainer would look like. Sarah proposed a monthly block of twenty hours at a hundred and twenty-five dollars an hour — that's two and a half grand a month, or thirty thousand a year. They negotiated to three thousand a month for a six-month commitment, which works out to eighteen thousand. But here's the kicker — after the first six months, they expanded it to forty hours a month. So she ended up with a sixty-thousand-dollar annual retainer. Luna: All because she said no to a single five-thousand-dollar project. That's a twelve-to-one return on that 'no' in the first year alone. Lucas: Exactly. And the key insight isn't that Sarah is some master negotiator. It's that she understood the psychology of the situation. By saying 'I don't do one-off projects,' she signaled that her time was scarce and valuable. She also gave them a clear alternative — a retainer — which is a path they hadn't considered. Luna: I think a lot of freelancers worry that if they say no to a project, the client will just walk. But Sarah's case suggests the opposite — at least under the right conditions. Lucas: Right. And that's what we're going to drill into today. What conditions make the strategic 'no' work, and how do you actually structure that conversation so it doesn't come off as arrogant or dismissive? Luna: Before we get into the how, can we talk about the mindset shift first? Because I think a lot of freelancers — myself included when I was starting out — feel like they have to take every scrap of work that comes their way. Lucas: Absolutely. That scarcity mindset is the biggest barrier. When you're in feast or famine mode, turning down a guaranteed five thousand dollars feels insane. But the math only works if you believe that your time is better spent pursuing higher-value arrangements, not just filling gaps. Luna: So what are the conditions? When is it actually smart to pull the 'I don't do one-off projects' move? Lucas: I think there are three. First, you need to have enough runway — at least two to three months of expenses saved — so that if the client walks, you're not in panic mode. Second, you need to genuinely believe that a retainer would serve the client better than a project. If you're just trying to upsell them on something they don't need, they'll smell it. And third, you need to have a clear sense of what the retainer would look like — scope, hours, duration — so you can articulate it confidently. Luna: That third one is huge. Sarah didn't just say 'I want a retainer.' She had a specific proposal ready. That shows preparation. Lucas: Exactly. And she tailored it to the client's needs. ByteGrid was growing fast, and they were going to need ongoing design work — new pitch decks, marketing materials, maybe even sales collateral. A retainer gave them priority access and consistency. It was actually a better deal for them too. Luna: So the conversation is really about reframing the value. You're not being difficult — you're offering a better solution. Lucas: Right. And the language matters a lot. I've seen a few different scripts that work. One is the 'focus' frame: 'I've found I do my best work when I'm embedded with a client over time. That's the model I'm focusing on now.' Another is the 'capacity' frame: 'I'm currently at capacity for project work, but I have room for one or two retainer clients. If that's something you're interested in, I'd love to explore it.' Luna: The capacity frame is interesting because it's truthful — you might genuinely be busy. But it also creates scarcity. Lucas: Exactly. And it gives the client a reason to act. If they think you might not be available later, they're more likely to say yes now. Luna: You know, this reminds me of something I read about the artist Jeff Koons. He supposedly turns down most commissions. But the ones he takes? They're huge, and they pay enormously. His 'no' is part of his brand. Lucas: That's a great parallel. Obviously, freelancers aren't Jeff Koons, but the principle scales down. The point is that 'no' can be a positioning tool. Every time you say yes to a low-value project, you're saying no to a high-value retainer opportunity. Luna: Let's talk about the actual conversation flow. How do you bring up the retainer idea without sounding like you're pitching? Lucas: The key is to make it about the client's outcome. You start by understanding their needs — ask questions about what they're trying to accomplish, how often they'll need work, what their timeline looks like. Then you say something like, 'Based on what you're describing, I think a retainer would actually serve you better than a one-off project. Here's why.' And then you lay out the benefits. Luna: So the 'no' doesn't even have to be the first thing you say. You can lead with curiosity. Lucas: Exactly. In Sarah's case, she could have had a discovery call before even quoting the pitch deck. But she handled it over email, which also works. The important thing is that she didn't just reject the project — she offered an alternative. Luna: What about the risk that the client feels pressured? Like, 'I just wanted a deck, and now you're trying to sell me a retainer.' Lucas: That's a real risk, which is why you have to be genuine. If you're only recommending a retainer because you want more money, the client will pick up on that. But if you genuinely believe the retainer is a better fit — which it often is for ongoing work — then you're actually helping them. Luna: And if they say no? Then you've lost the project. Lucas: You have, but that's the bet. And it's a calculated one. If you're in a position where you can afford to lose a project, the upside of landing a retainer is huge. And even if they say no to the retainer, they might come back later with a bigger project, because you've positioned yourself as someone who thinks strategically. Luna: That's a good point. You're building a reputation, not just closing a deal. Lucas: Exactly. And speaking of building something — if you're finding value in these episodes, if we've helped you think through a career move or decision, I want to mention something. We keep this show ad-free, and that's intentional. But listener support is what makes that possible. Luna: Yeah, it's a small thing, but it means a lot. If you enjoy the show and want to help us keep it independent, you can support us at buy me a coffee dot com slash fexingo. No pressure, seriously. It's just a way to say 'keep going.' Lucas: And we really appreciate it. Now, back to that retainer conversation — let's talk about the actual numbers. How should a freelancer figure out what to charge? Luna: Yes, because one of the mistakes I see is freelancers lowballing their retainer rate because they're afraid of scaring the client off. Lucas: Right. The general rule of thumb is that a retainer rate should be equal to or slightly higher than your project rate, because you're guaranteeing availability. But you also have to account for the fact that retainer work is more predictable — you can plan your schedule. So some freelancers actually offer a slight discount in exchange for the commitment. Luna: Which approach did Sarah take? Lucas: She charged her standard hourly rate — a hundred and twenty-five dollars — for the retainer hours. No discount. And the client accepted it because the value was clear: they got priority access and a dedicated designer who knew their brand. Luna: So the negotiation wasn't about price; it was about scope and duration. Lucas: Exactly. And that's another lesson. When you're negotiating a retainer, the variables aren't just price. You can negotiate hours per month, length of commitment, scope of work, response times, all of that. Price is just one lever. Luna: I want to ask about the timing. When in the client relationship should you bring up a retainer? Is it better to do it before you've done any work, like Sarah did, or after you've proven yourself? Lucas: Both can work, but I think the pre-emptive approach is underused. If you wait until after you've done a project, you've already set the expectation that you work on a project basis. It's harder to shift. By setting the expectation upfront, you filter for clients who are open to retainers from the start. Luna: That makes sense. But if you're already working with a client on a project basis, is it too late? Lucas: Not at all. You can transition a project client to a retainer at the end of a project. The natural moment is when they ask for additional work. You say, 'I'd love to keep helping you with this. Instead of another project, would you be open to a retainer arrangement? It would give us both more stability.' Luna: That's a much easier ask because you've already built trust. They know the quality of your work. Lucas: Exactly. And the beauty of the retainer model is that it transforms the relationship. You go from being a vendor to being a partner. You're no longer just executing tasks — you're proactively thinking about their needs. Luna: I've seen that shift happen in my own work. When I had a retainer client, I found myself sending them ideas before they even asked. It changed the dynamic completely. Lucas: That's the goal. And it's better for the client, too. They get a more engaged, invested partner. Luna: So if someone listening wants to try this, what's the first step? Should they cold email a former client? Use Sarah's exact script? Lucas: I'd say start with one client you already have a good relationship with. At the end of your current project, have the conversation we talked about. Or, if you're like Sarah and you get a new inquiry, try the 'I don't do one-off projects' line. But practice it first. Say it out loud. It feels uncomfortable the first time. Luna: That's good advice. And the worst that happens is the client says no, and you're back where you started. Lucas: Exactly. But the best case? You land a retainer that transforms your income stability. And that's worth a few uncomfortable conversations. Luna: I think we should talk about one more thing: how to structure the retainer agreement so it's fair to both sides. Lucas: Good point. The key elements are: number of hours per month, what happens if you go over or under — usually you can roll over up to a certain number of hours — and the notice period for termination. Most retainers are month to month after an initial three- or six-month commitment. Luna: And what about scope creep? The client starts asking for things outside the agreed-upon scope. Lucas: That's where a clear scope document is essential. You define what's included — say, up to three design revisions per project, or two strategy calls per month. Anything beyond that is billed at an additional hourly rate. That protects both of you. Luna: So really, the retainer is just a framework for a relationship. It's not a magic bullet — you still have to manage it well. Lucas: Exactly. But when it works, it's the closest thing to a salary that a freelancer can get. And it all starts with the willingness to say no to a one-off project. Luna: I think Sarah's story is a great example of that. It's not about being arrogant; it's about knowing your value and being willing to walk away. Lucas: Right. And that's a skill you can build. Start small, practice the script, and see what happens. The worst outcome is you learn something. The best outcome is you change your freelance business.