Latest / INSPIRE STORY / #0209_ STORY INSPIRE: Puerto Rican Papi — Culture, Identity, Comedy & Dark Humor
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon Show. Late May,
- 0:04Speaker 1: getting ready for the summer. One of my favorite people,
- 0:09Speaker 1: the guy who told me to start a podcast, this
- 0:11Speaker 1: is a fact.
- 0:13Speaker 2: Yeah. You are... What is the name? Luis Gomez. I'm kidding.
- 0:18Speaker 2: Luis J. Gomez. I always have to say Luis Gomez.
- 0:21Speaker 2: I know. Why is it so important to J?
- 0:23Speaker 3: Well, I mean, look, at this point, it's not really important.
- 0:27Speaker 2: Not for you. It's your name. If I didn't correct you,
- 0:30Speaker 2: it would be weird. It's a whole thing. It's a thing.
- 0:34Speaker 3: Paul F.
- 0:35Speaker 2: Tompkins. If you call Paul Tompkins.
- 0:36Speaker 3: He'll never be on this show.
- 0:41Speaker 2: That'll never, ever come up in my life. I understand.
- 0:45Speaker 2: Is Paul F. Tompkins on this show. Yeah. No, it
- 0:48Speaker 2: doesn't really.
- 0:48Speaker 3: You know what it is, honestly, why I use the
- 0:50Speaker 3: J truthfully? It's because when I was a child and
- 0:54Speaker 3: I was practicing my autograph.
- 0:56Speaker 2: The loops of the- Your signature. Yeah, yeah, my autograph.
- 0:59Speaker 2: I love that you call it an autograph.
- 1:00Speaker 3: No, but I wasn't practicing my signature. I was practicing
- 1:02Speaker 3: an autograph.
- 1:02Speaker 2: As a kid. That you were going to one day
- 1:03Speaker 2: give to people. Yeah, I was going to one day,
- 1:05Speaker 2: which is a weird thing because nobody asks for autographs.
- 1:07Speaker 2: I mean, nobody wants an autograph. But the J looked
- 1:09Speaker 2: so good. The Louis J. It does look good. Yeah.
- 1:12Speaker 2: You know, very leaky. No, my Instagram handle is Tim J.
- 1:15Speaker 3: Dillon.
- 1:15Speaker 2: There's something about a J that's nice. It puts that
- 1:18Speaker 2: stop between the two words. Donald J. Trump. Donald J. Trump.
- 1:21Speaker 2: Louis J. Gomez. Tim J.
- 1:22Speaker 3: Dillon. I get it, you know.
- 1:24Speaker 2: We're talking about a lot of things. Obviously, the economy
- 1:26Speaker 2: is a horror. Yeah. And you have a child. You
- 1:30Speaker 2: know how much things cost. Food. Yeah.
- 1:33Speaker 3: Gas.
- 1:33Speaker 2: I try not to pay attention. Of course. Genuinely. Genuinely. Yeah.
- 1:37Speaker 2: You just don't pay attention. I don't. I like that.
- 1:42Speaker 3: I'll drive myself fucking crazy, dude.
- 1:44Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 1:45Speaker 3: Gas prices. If my life was dictated where I was
- 1:47Speaker 3: walking around going, dude. These fucking gas prices.
- 1:51Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 1:52Speaker 3: Look, it sucks, and I know it drives the price
- 1:54Speaker 3: up of everything, right? But at the same time, like,
- 1:56Speaker 3: that's not the game I'm playing. I'm not driving down
- 1:59Speaker 3: the gas prices.
- 2:00Speaker 2: Right.
- 2:01Speaker 3: So what's the point about caring about it?
- 2:02Speaker 2: It's a great point. You can't affect it. Yeah. But
- 2:04Speaker 2: it's just a truism. It's out there.
- 2:06Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 2:07Speaker 2: It's out there. It's tough. Of course.
- 2:09Speaker 3: I only, you know, you play your cards. That's what
- 2:11Speaker 3: I say.
- 2:13Speaker 2: I agree.
- 2:14Speaker 1: You got to do what you can do out there.
- 2:16Speaker 1: But you're also, you have a business. You're doing well.
- 2:19Speaker 2: I'm doing all right. I'm not doing fucking Tim Dillon well. Yes,
- 2:22Speaker 2: you are. No, I'm not. You know what Tim did yesterday? Yes.
- 2:28Speaker 2: I'm in his apartment, and he goes, I'm going to
- 2:29Speaker 2: go buy a car.
- 2:31Speaker 3: And I'm like, all right, that's cool, dude. And I
- 2:33Speaker 3: was telling him about how Big Jay has a Jeep.
- 2:36Speaker 3: I was like, a Jeep's actually under the radar.
- 2:38Speaker 2: Like a Wrangler. So then he was like, yeah, I'm
- 2:40Speaker 2: going to get a Jeep. And I was like, really?
- 2:42Speaker 2: I was like, I was surprised. And he was like, yeah,
- 2:44Speaker 2: good for the money. I like it. Yes.
- 2:46Speaker 3: And then he came back two hours later to bring
- 2:48Speaker 3: me to the gym.
- 2:49Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 2:50Speaker 3: In a fucking Bentley.
- 2:52Speaker 2: Bentley Flying Spur. And I was like, I thought you
- 2:53Speaker 2: were getting a Jeep. He's like, I'm getting a fucking Jeep.
- 2:55Speaker 2: I left the apartment thinking about getting a Jeep.
- 3:00Speaker 1: I did and but here's the reality you know I
- 3:03Speaker 1: didn't end up getting the I had not slept here's
- 3:06Speaker 1: a fair point I had not slept in 48 hours
- 3:09Speaker 1: I was all fucked up from Australia from the jet
- 3:11Speaker 1: lag when I got back and I told him I
- 3:15Speaker 1: gave him a whole big speech about financial responsibility the
- 3:19Speaker 1: night before about how you have to save your money
- 3:22Speaker 1: things don't last forever and eventually we're probably gonna have
- 3:25Speaker 1: to live in a state like Florida you know because
- 3:27Speaker 1: it's less expensive to own property and the taxes are better.
- 3:31Speaker 1: And I said, we just got to be smart about
- 3:33Speaker 1: our money. I gave him a real big speed. And
- 3:34Speaker 1: the next day I bought a Bentley.
- 3:37Speaker 3: I've always wanted this car. Rolled off the lot. $ 30, 000
- 3:40Speaker 3: just melts off of it immediately.
- 3:43Speaker 2: Well, sure. That's yeah. Of course.
- 3:46Speaker 1: But here's the other thing. Um, those cars do have
- 3:50Speaker 1: a resale, a decent resale.
- 3:53Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 3:54Speaker 1: Because there's always going to be somebody that wants that car.
- 3:59Speaker 3: It's not going to be as much. You know what's funny?
- 4:02Speaker 3: It's just a car that I would never get that car.
- 4:05Speaker 2: It's incredible. It's beautiful.
- 4:06Speaker 3: But I just feel like if I were to get
- 4:08Speaker 3: that car, I would also need a driver. Ben should
- 4:10Speaker 3: be driving you around.
- 4:11Speaker 2: Hey, by the way, agreed. Yeah, he really should be. Hey, hey, hey.
- 4:18Speaker 1: Zero argument for me. Zero argument for me in that thing.
- 4:24Speaker 2: Me and Tim are in such different worlds, right? Like
- 4:27Speaker 2: he pulled in.
- 4:28Speaker 3: I thought we were going to his apartment before we
- 4:31Speaker 3: were going to lunch yesterday.
- 4:32Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 4:33Speaker 3: And he pulls into the Beverly Hills Hotel.
- 4:34Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 4:35Speaker 3: And I started to take my bags out of the
- 4:36Speaker 3: back thinking we're home. He was like, I don't live here,
- 4:38Speaker 3: you fucking idiot.
- 4:39Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah. I was like, no, no, no.
- 4:41Speaker 1: Well, we've been lucky because we have a friend. who
- 4:48Speaker 1: has a really, really big podcast. And he's had me
- 4:50Speaker 1: on a bunch. And he's the most influential podcaster in
- 4:52Speaker 1: the world. And his name is Tony Inchcliffe. And by
- 4:55Speaker 1: doing that show so many times, I was exposed to
- 4:58Speaker 1: lots of people.
- 4:59Speaker 2: And I was able to get a big group of
- 5:03Speaker 2: people listening. So we're happy about that. I also don't
- 5:07Speaker 2: have kids. I'm not going to have kids. I don't
- 5:09Speaker 2: have a family.
- 5:11Speaker 1: It allows me to kind of misbehave.
- 5:13Speaker 2: For you to buy a Bentley instead of funding your
- 5:16Speaker 2: kid's college is criminal. Right. It's criminal. Of course. But
- 5:19Speaker 2: that's the freedom.
- 5:20Speaker 3: But it's also, you know, you do those things.
- 5:25Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 5:26Speaker 3: Because, you know, you feel fucking good.
- 5:28Speaker 2: It's nice. And that fuels something else. It's harder.
- 5:33Speaker 3: So it's like if you want to fucking have a Bentley,
- 5:35Speaker 3: you're not going backwards now, Tim.
- 5:36Speaker 2: No.
- 5:37Speaker 3: And that is an investment into your own self-belief and
- 5:40Speaker 3: your own sort of way of doing things. And I
- 5:44Speaker 3: look at spending money as an investment. I take stupid vacations.
- 5:48Speaker 3: You know, I try to have nice things, you know?
- 5:50Speaker 1: Right.
- 5:50Speaker 3: I just, I'm classless. So when I say nice things,
- 5:54Speaker 3: like I got an inflatable hot tub and I'm like, dude,
- 5:56Speaker 3: I'm fucking killing it.
- 5:57Speaker 2: Right, right, right. You know, I'm not a... You have
- 5:59Speaker 2: nice things people would get with Marlboro miles. Yeah. You
- 6:04Speaker 2: know what I mean? Like, nice things that would come out.
- 6:06Speaker 1: Of a cigarette catalog, you'll get, you know?
- 6:09Speaker 2: A Marlboro leather jacket? Yeah. You'll get a tent, one
- 6:14Speaker 2: of those red tents they used to have. There's nothing
- 6:16Speaker 2: wrong with it. It's beautiful. These are beautiful things.
- 6:18Speaker 3: Dude, I would look at the Marlboro Miles catalog in awe,
- 6:21Speaker 3: be like, wow, dude.
- 6:22Speaker 2: Yeah. All of these things you could get. None of
- 6:25Speaker 2: it matters. The only thing that matters is friends and family. Yeah. Now...
- 6:32Speaker 2: Here's the difference, though. It is a... It is... All
- 6:34Speaker 2: of these things are inherently dumb.
- 6:36Speaker 1: Anything you buy is kind of stupid, but it makes
- 6:38Speaker 1: you feel good, and it's a nice thing.
- 6:41Speaker 2: And that's all it is, right? I mean, they're not...
- 6:43Speaker 2: They don't change your life, but they give you maybe
- 6:46Speaker 2: a little bit of joy in a world where every
- 6:51Speaker 2: now and then you need a little joy.
- 6:52Speaker 3: I think worthwhile investments are your home, your car, wherever
- 6:58Speaker 3: you're spending a lot of time to yourself thinking, quote unquote, meditate.
- 7:02Speaker 3: We don't fucking meditate anymore, but when you're driving, you
- 7:04Speaker 3: can't really be texting.
- 7:05Speaker 2: I mean, I do. Right. You know. Sure.
- 7:07Speaker 3: But when you're driving, like, you're alone with your thoughts.
- 7:11Speaker 3: You're listening to music, but you're sort of thinking through
- 7:12Speaker 3: your life and all that shit. And if you're in
- 7:14Speaker 3: a fucking shitty car, you're going to just feel like shit,
- 7:17Speaker 3: in my opinion.
- 7:17Speaker 2: Yes. I think it's... I've been in a shitty car.
- 7:20Speaker 2: I used to drive an Oldsmobile 88. Not even a year.
- 7:23Speaker 2: That's the type of car.
- 7:25Speaker 1: And it would literally, like, when I would press the
- 7:27Speaker 1: brake too hard, the car would shut off.
- 7:29Speaker 2: Yeah. Like, I've been in Mitsubishi Galant. I've been in
- 7:33Speaker 2: old pieces of shit. I just.
- 7:34Speaker 3: I would just buy... For years, the cheapest car at
- 7:39Speaker 3: the used car dealership, not like a used car dealership,
- 7:41Speaker 3: like a certified pre-owned Toyota. I'm talking about like a guy.
- 7:45Speaker 2: Who bought shitty cars. And this Bentley is certified pre-owned.
- 7:48Speaker 2: This is certified pre-owned Bentley. Good. 2018. It's not brand new.
- 7:52Speaker 3: You don't have to tell people that.
- 7:53Speaker 2: Well, but here's the reality. It's no different than a
- 7:56Speaker 2: 2021 or 2022. But people ask, my cunt friends.
- 7:59Speaker 3: Can you look up the differences between the 2022 and
- 8:02Speaker 3: the 2018?
- 8:04Speaker 2: There's very few.
- 8:04Speaker 3: There's going to be a handful of them.
- 8:06Speaker 2: There's not that many. What were you saying?
- 8:08Speaker 1: Bentley's not a high-tech car, meaning, like, it doesn't have, like,
- 8:11Speaker 1: the runner lights. Like, when you get in a Bentley,
- 8:13Speaker 1: it doesn't, you know, it's not like a new Beamer
- 8:16Speaker 1: or a Mercedes where they have the pink and.
- 8:18Speaker 2: Purple running lights. Designed by a Puerto Rican. Yeah, it
- 8:20Speaker 2: looks kind of ethnic. It looks a little ethnic. You know,
- 8:25Speaker 2: the reality is this is more of an English gentleman's car.
- 8:27Speaker 2: It doesn't have a horn that goes beep-a-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee. Yeah, right, right. Yeah,
- 8:30Speaker 2: this isn't a, you know... So they have some new stuff.
- 8:34Speaker 3: My Audi, like literally half the technology is being able
- 8:36Speaker 3: to change the lighting panels and everything.
- 8:38Speaker 1: Right.
- 8:39Speaker 3: It really is, dude. All of the technology went into
- 8:42Speaker 3: I got a fucking white trim.
- 8:43Speaker 1: Some people like when they get in a car for
- 8:46Speaker 1: it to be lit up and to feel like a,
- 8:48Speaker 1: you know, some type of carnival.
- 8:50Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 8:50Speaker 1: Because that's where they work or that's where their good
- 8:53Speaker 1: family memories are going.
- 8:54Speaker 2: To a free carnival. It's a simple way.
- 8:57Speaker 3: Yeah. They're treating people like morons. They're going, you like
- 9:01Speaker 3: flashing lights, don't you?
- 9:02Speaker 2: Yeah. And we do.
- 9:03Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 9:04Speaker 2: I love it. For sure. I mean, there's nothing wrong
- 9:06Speaker 2: with it.
- 9:06Speaker 3: If I want to, I could match my lighting scheme
- 9:09Speaker 3: to my outfits. They sold it to me that way.
- 9:12Speaker 3: They looked at me, they're like, this Puerto Rican guy
- 9:14Speaker 3: is going to love this feature. Right. And they said,
- 9:16Speaker 3: you can match the lighting scheme every day to whatever
- 9:17Speaker 3: outfit you're wearing.
- 9:18Speaker 2: And I was like, what the fuck is wrong with you?
- 9:19Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, that's such a... So the new one
- 9:23Speaker 1: is going to probably... I don't even know what these
- 9:27Speaker 1: differences are. I mean, they both have a V8 engine, right? Yeah,
- 9:31Speaker 1: it's a four liter. I have a sport package, which
- 9:33Speaker 1: they don't even make anymore, which is faster. My engines might.
- 9:36Speaker 2: Be even better.
- 9:37Speaker 4: And this is the 2018 right here.
- 9:41Speaker 2: Four liter V8. Same shit. Yeah, same shit.
- 9:44Speaker 4: I mean.
- 9:45Speaker 1: And again, if you look, go to the interior of
- 9:47Speaker 1: the 2020, I mean, by the way, is this not
- 9:49Speaker 1: a relatable segment?
- 9:50Speaker 2: This is like the least relatable. Of the 2018.
- 9:52Speaker 1: I mean, there are people, I have people watching this
- 9:55Speaker 1: overdosing on heroin right now. But if you look at it,
- 9:58Speaker 1: look at it yeah go to the next one Ben
- 9:59Speaker 1: go to the right right can I tell you why
- 10:01Speaker 1: it's relatable yeah yeah tell me why because they fucking
- 10:04Speaker 1: oh they watched you dude I remember yeah I remember
- 10:06Speaker 1: Tim once a month would ask me for an advance
- 10:09Speaker 1: on his I.
- 10:09Speaker 3: Would $ 600 a month podcast payout.
- 10:12Speaker 2: I would and like the 27th would hit and yeah
- 10:14Speaker 2: he's like dude I need the money I need I
- 10:16Speaker 2: need it in cash I know, and you'd give it
- 10:18Speaker 2: to me. I appreciate that. And then I would upload
- 10:21Speaker 2: a photo an hour later at a steakhouse. You fucking would.
- 10:26Speaker 2: The $ 75 steak.
- 10:30Speaker 3: It's inspiring for people to watch you. This is why
- 10:33Speaker 3: people like you. That is fucking relatable. You're not fucking
- 10:36Speaker 3: gifted at anything, dude. You've been hustling and grinding for
- 10:38Speaker 3: a long time. It's 12 years. It's a long time.
- 10:41Speaker 2: It's a really long time. I'm 37 now. The best
- 10:43Speaker 2: years of my life are over, and they were poor.
- 10:47Speaker 1: Like the vast majority of my life. I would have
- 10:49Speaker 1: rather have this money at.
- 10:51Speaker 2: 21 because you have more energy. It's cooler. That's why
- 10:54Speaker 2: the LA people... Now, obviously, I.
- 10:56Speaker 1: Have more perspective now and blah, blah, blah. But the
- 10:58Speaker 1: LA life that these TikTokers live is what's supposed to happen.
- 11:01Speaker 1: You get famous at 18.
- 11:03Speaker 2: You're famous until you're 25, and then you die at
- 11:05Speaker 2: 27 or 28.
- 11:07Speaker 1: Because it doesn't get better, and you did it. And
- 11:10Speaker 1: you were famous at the best time to be famous.
- 11:13Speaker 1: You didn't work for it. You didn't know what it was.
- 11:16Speaker 2: You had no... Now, we have perspective. It's, you know.
- 11:19Speaker 1: But there's something nice about just getting a whole bunch
- 11:22Speaker 1: of shit you don't even know why you have it.
- 11:24Speaker 2: And all of it's just fun.
- 11:25Speaker 3: I don't even understand how I got laid when I
- 11:28Speaker 3: was in my 20s. I was so poor and dirty.
- 11:32Speaker 3: My body was dirty. What were you doing for work?
- 11:36Speaker 3: I was selling comedy club tickets. When I first started
- 11:39Speaker 3: in comedy, I was selling comedy club tickets. And then
- 11:43Speaker 3: I would just fucking be out there. I was a
- 11:45Speaker 3: street kid. I was like, we'd smoke blunts in stairwells
- 11:48Speaker 3: and drink 40s on stoops. And there'd be women that
- 11:53Speaker 3: I'd hook up. And I think back now, I'm like,
- 11:54Speaker 3: how would any woman ever... Like, I'm like a shitty comedian.
- 12:00Speaker 3: Just not like, how does a woman spread her legs
- 12:03Speaker 3: for an unfunny comedian? That's a crazy thing. He's trying
- 12:06Speaker 3: to be funny.
- 12:06Speaker 2: Many of them do. It's a crazy thing. By the way,
- 12:08Speaker 2: many of them have big houses with unfunny comedians and
- 12:12Speaker 2: live very well. Oh, I'm very sure. They do very well.
- 12:15Speaker 2: We were talking about... people that don't have money that
- 12:20Speaker 2: want to go on vacation.
- 12:21Speaker 1: And we wanted to give a kind of a guide
- 12:26Speaker 1: to people that don't have a lot that need to
- 12:29Speaker 1: take their kids somewhere. Because it's my belief that you
- 12:33Speaker 1: got to go on a summer vacation, even if you
- 12:37Speaker 1: don't leave your town.
- 12:38Speaker 2: Like some people go on a staycation. That's terrible. It's sad.
- 12:41Speaker 2: That's garbage. It's very hard. You shouldn't do that. Have you,
- 12:44Speaker 2: but you've even seen that.
- 12:46Speaker 3: I was, yeah, I see that all the time. But
- 12:47Speaker 3: I was in, we go on the road a lot.
- 12:49Speaker 3: So we're in hotels. And you'll just see, this happened
- 12:51Speaker 3: last weekend in Providence. There's a family in the pool.
- 12:55Speaker 3: And I'm like, in my mind, I'm going, why would
- 12:57Speaker 3: anybody visit Providence?
- 12:58Speaker 2: Right.
- 12:59Speaker 3: And then they were like, oh, we're from Newport. We're
- 13:00Speaker 3: like 40 minutes away from here. We just like did
- 13:02Speaker 3: a staycation. I look at this poor little three-year-old and
- 13:06Speaker 3: I wanted to kidnap him. And just release him into
- 13:08Speaker 3: the parking lot. That would be a better life.
- 13:09Speaker 2: And Newport's a nicer area.
- 13:11Speaker 1: So it's weird that they went to Providence. So what's
- 13:12Speaker 1: going on is like the dad's into something weird. Or
- 13:15Speaker 1: the mom is. There's no reason you go from Newport
- 13:17Speaker 1: to Providence for a staycation. Something's going on.
- 13:20Speaker 2: They wanted the pool. That was it. There's pools in Newport.
- 13:23Speaker 2: I don't know. Something's up. They wanted to get out
- 13:25Speaker 2: of town. I don't know.
- 13:26Speaker 3: But I felt so bad. I think about that all
- 13:29Speaker 3: the time. I'll be at like a gig in Atlantic City.
- 13:32Speaker 2: And you'll see a family.
- 13:34Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 13:34Speaker 2: It's tough. It's fucking brutal, dude. And you see a
- 13:37Speaker 2: family just at a shitty hotel. And it's usually like
- 13:39Speaker 2: an indoor pool.
- 13:41Speaker 3: Terrible.
- 13:41Speaker 2: Smells bad.
- 13:42Speaker 3: I might do that with my family as like a joke.
- 13:45Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 13:46Speaker 3: I might bring my whole family to Atlantic City to
- 13:48Speaker 3: be funny.
- 13:49Speaker 2: As a bit. As like a bit. Yeah. Like we're
- 13:51Speaker 2: all in on it. We're going to like... Yeah, and
- 13:53Speaker 2: then just bring them and go. Here's... Welcome to the...
- 13:56Speaker 2: I mean.
- 13:56Speaker 3: I did that when I was a kid. So my
- 13:58Speaker 3: friend Rocky, who ended up being gay, he tried to
- 14:01Speaker 3: suck my dick when we were in the sixth grade.
- 14:03Speaker 2: Interesting. So I always knew.
- 14:04Speaker 3: He was playing with Barbies when he was a kid. Yeah.
- 14:07Speaker 3: Real Tim Dillon. Yeah.
- 14:09Speaker 2: What's he up to now?
- 14:10Speaker 3: He sells real estate.
- 14:11Speaker 2: Does he do well? I don't know.
- 14:13Speaker 3: But I stay in touch here and there. But he fucking...
- 14:15Speaker 3: Now he's very, very out. But his family....
- 14:20Speaker 2: We were so poor. Right. I thought his family was rich. Right.
- 14:24Speaker 3: His family lived in like a nice trailer. A nice,
- 14:28Speaker 3: a particularly nice trailer.
- 14:32Speaker 2: That's how rough it was.
- 14:33Speaker 3: Yeah, it was, I shit you not, dude, and they
- 14:35Speaker 3: would take me on their family vacations and I'm like, wow, dude,
- 14:38Speaker 3: we go to Bally's in Atlantic City.
- 14:40Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 14:41Speaker 1: His dad's just throwing bones at Bally's. You're like, it's
- 14:45Speaker 1: your fresh Prince of Bel-Air.
- 14:46Speaker 2: Yes.
- 14:47Speaker 1: And the guy, you're driving in a trailer to Bally's.
- 14:50Speaker 3: This was, I mean, yeah, dude, I think back, it's
- 14:52Speaker 3: so funny how poor this family was.
- 14:55Speaker 2: Yeah. And how, and they looked down their nose at me.
- 14:58Speaker 3: Like I remember feeling like, I was like.
- 14:59Speaker 1: Oh, I grew up. We didn't have a ton of money.
- 15:03Speaker 1: Like I had an, I had a backyard pool. It
- 15:05Speaker 1: was an in-ground pool. but it was six feet. So
- 15:08Speaker 1: when you dove into it, you had to dive out.
- 15:10Speaker 1: Like you couldn't dive down. And a lot of my
- 15:13Speaker 1: friends had the eight foot, 10 foot pool, 12 foot
- 15:15Speaker 1: pool was much larger.
- 15:17Speaker 2: When you, when you were to jump in, you could
- 15:19Speaker 2: dive straight down.
- 15:20Speaker 1: So when you, but when you, when you're up in
- 15:22Speaker 1: the air and you realize I can't dive straight down,
- 15:24Speaker 1: I have to dive out to me.
- 15:26Speaker 2: That's what poverty is. The thought, the thought of how
- 15:29Speaker 2: deep is the pool is poverty to me, because a
- 15:32Speaker 2: big pool where you don't even worry about how deep
- 15:35Speaker 2: it is. Cause it just is deep. You just, that
- 15:38Speaker 2: to me is.
- 15:38Speaker 3: We use, so our landlord when we were kids, Mary Leone,
- 15:44Speaker 3: she was this fucking old white lady.
- 15:47Speaker 2: She's still around? No, she's very dead. Long dead.
- 15:50Speaker 3: But her niece, or I guess her grandkids, right? They
- 15:55Speaker 3: were like, these kids, they were like, you know, they
- 15:57Speaker 3: just had like the fun toys. But once again, these
- 15:59Speaker 3: people were all trash. None of these people were rich.
- 16:01Speaker 2: No, none of them. But they had like a.
- 16:03Speaker 3: An in-ground pool, but there was like algae in it.
- 16:05Speaker 3: It just wasn't, it was a fucking garbage ass family.
- 16:08Speaker 3: And I remember they would just like be in the pool.
- 16:11Speaker 3: They would invite us in sometimes, but literally one of
- 16:13Speaker 3: the biggest like cringey things in my life I think
- 16:16Speaker 3: back is just one time I was like standing in
- 16:17Speaker 3: the pool wanting them to invite me in. And like
- 16:20Speaker 3: just staring. And I was like, I want to go
- 16:22Speaker 3: back in time and just fucking... Tell yourself don't do that.
- 16:25Speaker 3: What are you fucking doing, dude? Have some pride. What
- 16:28Speaker 3: the fuck is wrong with you? Fuck their pool. Go
- 16:30Speaker 3: get your own pool.
- 16:31Speaker 2: Right. Yeah. Yeah. Where would you and your family go
- 16:36Speaker 2: on a trip? Did you ever take a vacation?
- 16:39Speaker 3: My mom would take us. Now, I remember.
- 16:42Speaker 2: And this was, she was a little, she did drugs.
- 16:44Speaker 3: My mom was a heroin addict and a prostitute.
- 16:47Speaker 2: And a prostitute. And I knew this.
- 16:48Speaker 3: I knew my mom was a prostitute for as long
- 16:50Speaker 3: as I can remember. Because I remember my. It was
- 16:53Speaker 3: like this old guy who was my sister's godfather actually,
- 16:56Speaker 3: and I caught them like naked in bed together. And
- 16:59Speaker 3: I remember even at like three or four years old
- 17:01Speaker 3: just thinking, I was like, well, she's not fucking him
- 17:03Speaker 3: for pleasure. I was like, she's being paid for this.
- 17:05Speaker 3: And I just sort of connected the dots.
- 17:06Speaker 2: Even as a young child. Young child.
- 17:08Speaker 3: I just knew. And I sort of, it was, you know,
- 17:11Speaker 3: I just knew that's what it was.
- 17:13Speaker 2: Yeah, were you proud a little bit?
- 17:15Speaker 3: Yeah, I was collecting a commission on it.
- 17:21Speaker 2: It is.
- 17:21Speaker 1: No, to me, there's something about that that is a
- 17:24Speaker 1: little bit, you go, hey, mom is really working.
- 17:29Speaker 2: Mommy's working!
- 17:32Speaker 3: No, I think I sort of blocked it from my
- 17:34Speaker 3: memory for a while. But I think back now, I
- 17:37Speaker 3: just remember having the thought that this is for fucking money. Um,
- 17:41Speaker 3: so yeah, my mom was fucking trash. So we were
- 17:44Speaker 3: just really, really poor. You know, she wasn't, she wasn't
- 17:46Speaker 3: a high end prostitute either.
- 17:47Speaker 2: Like, right. Honestly, if you're a hooker, by the way,
- 17:49Speaker 2: you don't need to say that. Well, that's crazy though.
- 17:51Speaker 1: I appreciate that. You don't need to say, I love that.
- 17:56Speaker 1: You have to, you go just in case anyone out
- 17:58Speaker 1: there was wondering, um, my.
- 18:00Speaker 2: Mother, she was not high. She was an attractive woman.
- 18:04Speaker 2: In fact, if you go on my Instagram, you know,
- 18:06Speaker 2: high end prostitutes, not only attractive, it's like, it's a
- 18:09Speaker 2: whole thing. No, they gotta be kind of... They're hot. Well,
- 18:13Speaker 2: they gotta be hot. First and foremost, they gotta be hot.
- 18:16Speaker 2: All right, go to my Instagram right now. They gotta
- 18:18Speaker 2: have the money to travel, right? Go to Mother's Day.
- 18:20Speaker 2: Go down right to the right. That's my mom with
- 18:22Speaker 2: the red hair. Okay, right here. Okay, right here. My
- 18:23Speaker 2: mom cleaned up. No, she's pretty. She's a pretty woman.
- 18:27Speaker 2: She cleaned up.
- 18:28Speaker 3: Yeah. Okay, that's my sister right there. Now, she would
- 18:32Speaker 3: not be a high end.
- 18:33Speaker 2: I just look at you and your sister. This is
- 18:34Speaker 2: what I think. And I say to myself.
- 18:36Speaker 1: God bless this woman, because I would have abandoned you
- 18:39Speaker 1: kids instead of fucking to feed you two, which, by
- 18:45Speaker 1: the way, you're clearly fed. I would have abandoned you
- 18:50Speaker 1: two immediately, like at a truck stop in Jersey.
- 18:55Speaker 2: But good for her.
- 18:56Speaker 3: I mean, Iris, but one of my- What a sad
- 18:58Speaker 3: family photo.
- 18:59Speaker 1: Growing up, one of my women that I looked up
- 19:02Speaker 1: to was a prostitute, my friend's mother. And she would
- 19:05Speaker 1: explain to us how she was always a prostitute. She
- 19:08Speaker 1: was still kind of a prostitute and she took all
- 19:09Speaker 1: that money and invested it in stocks and knew all
- 19:12Speaker 1: about the market, and she was very interested.
- 19:14Speaker 2: Oh, yeah. That's crazy.
- 19:15Speaker 3: My mom didn't do any of that. My mom bought
- 19:17Speaker 3: heroin with it.
- 19:18Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 19:18Speaker 3: And I think when she was hard up for heroin,
- 19:20Speaker 3: I think her prices would drop dramatically.
- 19:22Speaker 2: Right, yeah. Then it was just kind of a.
- 19:24Speaker 3: But she would be a $ 300 an hour hooker.
- 19:27Speaker 2: Right. Mid-range. Did she ever admit it to you?
- 19:31Speaker 3: No, we never got there.
- 19:32Speaker 2: You never broached it either? Never got there. Were there
- 19:36Speaker 2: men coming and going? Well, that's what they were paying
- 19:39Speaker 2: her for. Right. But would you notice like different guys around?
- 19:44Speaker 3: No, so this is when I was really young. I
- 19:47Speaker 3: don't think she was hooking when I was like, at
- 19:50Speaker 3: an age where I really had memories of it.
- 19:51Speaker 2: Gotcha. So I was like three or four. Well, that
- 19:53Speaker 2: was nice of her.
- 19:54Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, she ended up, you know, becoming a hairdresser,
- 19:57Speaker 3: which is actually, I have less respect for hairdressers than.
- 20:00Speaker 2: I do for hookers. Oh, much less. I mean.
- 20:01Speaker 1: But here's what's nice about her. She didn't sell you
- 20:04Speaker 1: or your sister. Some prostitutes like, you know, you know
- 20:08Speaker 1: what I mean?
- 20:08Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, in fairness to her, it was a
- 20:10Speaker 2: hard sell. That would have been a tough sell. You
- 20:12Speaker 2: and your sister. I mean, that would have been a
- 20:14Speaker 2: very rough.
- 20:16Speaker 3: You got to be into both. If you're into both
- 20:17Speaker 3: of us, that's a lot.
- 20:19Speaker 2: Well, you've got to be a pedophile and kind of blind.
- 20:22Speaker 2: Be into fat cholos.
- 20:23Speaker 1: Yeah, you've got to have a fat cholo fetish as
- 20:26Speaker 1: a pedophile. Like, imagine, are there those pedophiles that go
- 20:30Speaker 1: to Epstein's Island and they're like, yeah, I know, you've
- 20:32Speaker 1: got all these thin, you know, white kids, but, like,
- 20:35Speaker 1: I want fat cholos.
- 20:36Speaker 3: I want fat Mexican kids, not hot Eastern European.
- 20:39Speaker 2: I want gathering of the juggalos cholos. Like... Yeah.
- 20:45Speaker 3: So our vacations that I remember, we would go to
- 20:48Speaker 3: Seaside Heights, New Jersey.
- 20:51Speaker 2: Right. Because it's nice because it's the beach and she
- 20:53Speaker 2: could score.
- 20:54Speaker 3: She could probably just find heroin on the beach.
- 20:57Speaker 2: Right. Yeah. And what would that entail, Seaside Heights? Would
- 21:01Speaker 2: you get a room somewhere? I think we would get,
- 21:04Speaker 2: she called it a cabin. Okay.
- 21:06Speaker 3: But what I remember it as was.
- 21:10Speaker 3: Like a shed, and there was like one building that's
- 21:12Speaker 3: almost like a shed with a couple beds, and you
- 21:15Speaker 3: could enter in on either side. Very, very vague memories
- 21:18Speaker 3: of these Seaside Heights cabins. Probably like 15 bucks a night,
- 21:21Speaker 3: something like that, right? Some really, really fucking cheap.
- 21:24Speaker 1: When you say enter on either side, I'm thinking like
- 21:26Speaker 1: public restroom.
- 21:27Speaker 2: Kind of, yeah, like that, almost like that.
- 21:28Speaker 1: I feel like you're like, my memories were like, there
- 21:31Speaker 1: was like three bathrooms. There were no beds and you
- 21:33Speaker 1: could enter on either side. And there were hand dryers
- 21:36Speaker 1: on each side.
- 21:37Speaker 2: Of the wall to dry your hands. And she would
- 21:40Speaker 2: set up a bag, sleeping bag for me and my
- 21:42Speaker 2: sister on the floor of this. So you would stay
- 21:45Speaker 2: for two nights a night?
- 21:46Speaker 3: Probably something like that, two nights. I don't even remember.
- 21:49Speaker 2: On it!
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- 24:51Speaker 3: The best vacation my mom ever took us on. God,
- 24:55Speaker 3: this is going to be rough.
- 24:56Speaker 1: It's going to be so sad because you, here's why
- 24:58Speaker 1: it's going to be so sad.
- 25:00Speaker 2: You've specified that this is the best. This is the
- 25:03Speaker 2: top of the line.
- 25:04Speaker 3: Top of the line vacation my mother ever took us on.
- 25:07Speaker 2: Hartford, Connecticut. Oh my God.
- 25:10Speaker 3: To see WrestleMania 11. Now it was cool.
- 25:13Speaker 2: That's kind of cool. That's not bad. That's actually not bad.
- 25:16Speaker 3: We were massive pro wrestling fans.
- 25:17Speaker 2: Give it up for, hey, give it up for this whore.
- 25:21Speaker 3: She did, it was the one fucking thing she really,
- 25:24Speaker 3: she spent the money, like, you know, I think at
- 25:26Speaker 3: the time the tickets were probably 75 bucks a pop,
- 25:28Speaker 3: which is a lot of money for her.
- 25:29Speaker 2: Yeah. A lot of money.
- 25:30Speaker 3: No, that's fucking cool as fuck. We were like, you know,
- 25:32Speaker 3: 20 rows back maybe. You saw us on camera.
- 25:34Speaker 2: We were like along the gate. You and your sister.
- 25:36Speaker 2: Me and my sister.
- 25:37Speaker 3: It was the best time ever. They do a fan festival.
- 25:39Speaker 2: Where you meet all the wrestlers. Now I feel bad. No,
- 25:42Speaker 2: don't feel bad. But very influential.
- 25:43Speaker 3: If you look at the WrestleMania Fan Festival, what we
- 25:46Speaker 3: do with Skank Fest, that was one of the best memories.
- 25:49Speaker 3: The WrestleMania Fan Festival, you show up. And it's not
- 25:52Speaker 3: just fucking like autographs. They have a lot of interactive shit.
- 25:55Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying? You're meeting the wrestlers, you
- 25:58Speaker 3: do meet and greets and shit, but they're like doing
- 26:00Speaker 3: fucking other things. There's like shows happening.
- 26:01Speaker 2: You know what's hilarious? Stan Hope goes on Rogan and
- 26:04Speaker 2: brings up how cool Skankfest is. This is ridiculous. And
- 26:06Speaker 2: then Rogan just shuts it down immediately and goes, you
- 26:08Speaker 2: should do your own fest. And he's trying to have
- 26:14Speaker 2: a nice pitch. It's a nice pitch. He's like, I
- 26:19Speaker 2: did this festival. It's just the greatest thing ever. And
- 26:22Speaker 2: Brogan's like, he was like, oh, yeah.
- 26:23Speaker 3: He's like, that's really probably because the comedy scene down
- 26:25Speaker 3: in Houston is great. He's like, there's nothing to do
- 26:27Speaker 3: with the comedy scene.
- 26:28Speaker 2: In fucking Houston. There's nothing to do with it.
- 26:34Speaker 3: Mostly from New York City to Houston and fucking did
- 26:37Speaker 3: the most unique, fun, interactive, craziest comedy festival ever. But
- 26:41Speaker 3: Doug Sandhop should just steal the idea. He should just
- 26:44Speaker 3: take it.
- 26:45Speaker 2: Joe's like, you should do your own, man.
- 26:47Speaker 3: The same guy who assaulted Carlos Mancia for stealing a
- 26:50Speaker 3: shitty Ari Shaffir joke. The shittiest Ari Shafir joke that's
- 26:54Speaker 3: ever been fucking written.
- 26:56Speaker 2: Well, he stole more than that. I know. He stole
- 26:58Speaker 2: a lot. He stole a lot. But, you know. That
- 27:00Speaker 2: was a straw. No, but I'm kidding. Yeah, yeah. No, no, no. No, no.
- 27:03Speaker 2: We love him. But, I mean, it is funny that
- 27:05Speaker 2: he was just like. Steal it. Do your own. Well,
- 27:08Speaker 2: it's not stealing. He just said do your own fast.
- 27:10Speaker 3: I think he's a little disconnected from what Skankfest is.
- 27:12Speaker 3: I think he thinks that's what Bert's doing.
- 27:14Speaker 2: By the way, I hope he's disconnected. He's worth hundreds
- 27:17Speaker 2: of millions of dollars. I hope he's disconnected from it.
- 27:19Speaker 3: Yeah, but I mean, like, you know, Bert's doing his
- 27:21Speaker 3: own festival. It's not the same thing, though.
- 27:23Speaker 2: Right.
- 27:24Speaker 3: There's nothing like Skankfest. You got to go and see
- 27:26Speaker 3: it and know what it is in order to fucking.
- 27:28Speaker 2: You know. And then what is, what would you say
- 27:29Speaker 2: the difference with Skankfest is? Is it people get raped?
- 27:31Speaker 2: It's a party. It's a party. Well, yeah. Well, they
- 27:33Speaker 2: don't tell.
- 27:33Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 27:34Speaker 2: It's a party. Here's the thing with Skankfest.
- 27:36Speaker 3: All things, the fucking, whatever they call it, Netflix is
- 27:38Speaker 3: a joke festival.
- 27:38Speaker 2: Here's what I will say about Skankfest. It is an
- 27:40Speaker 2: immersive experience. Yeah. Meaning that it is three days.
- 27:45Speaker 1: It involves not only going to see standup, but you
- 27:47Speaker 1: have like other events that comedians go to and we'll
- 27:51Speaker 1: be at.
- 27:51Speaker 2: And you can like mix with.
- 27:52Speaker 3: You can live podcasts, just fighting pro wrestling. There's fucking just,
- 27:55Speaker 3: there's mechanical bulls and fucking games. And, Beer pong tournaments.
- 28:01Speaker 2: It's stupid, dude. It's a fun thing. It's a fun thing.
- 28:03Speaker 2: It's a Woodstock for people that like podcasts. And it's
- 28:05Speaker 2: the best podcast fans in the world. Best comedy fans
- 28:08Speaker 2: in the world. They love comedy. They love... Every time
- 28:12Speaker 2: I've done a show, it's Gang Fest.
- 28:13Speaker 1: It's always been great. And every time we've done a
- 28:15Speaker 1: live podcast, it's Gang Fest.
- 28:16Speaker 2: Yeah. It's always been great.
- 28:18Speaker 3: It's going to be stupid. We're going to do Bastard Radio.
- 28:19Speaker 2: Yeah, it'll be fun. I'm forcing you. It'll be fun. No,
- 28:22Speaker 2: I'm doing it. I told you I would do it.
- 28:23Speaker 3: I know.
- 28:23Speaker 2: I'm excited. Absolutely will do it.
- 28:24Speaker 3: Me and the great Nick Mullen, I think we're going
- 28:27Speaker 3: to do a State of the Industry address as Bastard Radio. Yeah.
- 28:30Speaker 3: So the biggest topics from the year we're going to
- 28:32Speaker 3: break down.
- 28:32Speaker 2: I just want to cover, please. If we do a
- 28:35Speaker 2: State of the Industry address, we've got to carve out.
- 28:38Speaker 2: Gringo Poppy? Who does what? I want to do LA.
- 28:40Speaker 2: I want to do the LA. I said we just. No, no, no.
- 28:42Speaker 2: I want to do the State of the LA podcast scene. Oh, yeah.
- 28:45Speaker 2: As part of the State of the Industry address at
- 28:48Speaker 2: Skank Fest. Yeah. You and Nick can do everything else. Yeah.
- 28:51Speaker 2: Everything else. That's yours. Whatever. You guys cover all of New.
- 28:54Speaker 1: York, television and film, every podcast in the world other than.
- 28:58Speaker 1: And you could also comment on the State of the
- 29:00Speaker 1: LA podcast scene, of course.
- 29:01Speaker 2: Of course. But I would like to. You need to
- 29:02Speaker 2: lead it.
- 29:03Speaker 1: My expertise, I just want to do the state of
- 29:05Speaker 1: the L.A. podcast scene, the great enduring scene that will
- 29:08Speaker 1: never die. And it'll be called the L.A. podcast scene,
- 29:11Speaker 1: the scene that will.
- 29:11Speaker 2: Never die, and it will have the photos of the
- 29:13Speaker 2: people who are currently in prison.
- 29:17Speaker 3: Tim, can we play word association L.A. comic scene?
- 29:20Speaker 2: Sure. All right, ready? You just got to fire it off.
- 29:23Speaker 2: Don't be a pussy. Whitney Cummings. Drugs. Bobby Lee. Korean.
- 29:31Speaker 2: I mean, it's the first thing that comes to mind.
- 29:33Speaker 2: Brian Callen. Rough year. Gringo Poppy. Kind of... brilliant. Kind of, kind.
- 29:43Speaker 1: Of brilliantly, brilliantly funny in a way that no comedy
- 29:47Speaker 1: special has ever been because it's, it's mysterious in a
- 29:50Speaker 1: way because you're looking at it and you're going like,
- 29:53Speaker 1: there's a lot of choices made and you don't know
- 29:55Speaker 1: why those choices were made.
- 29:56Speaker 2: Of course. Yeah. The comedy store. Uh, Fine. That's it.
- 30:06Speaker 2: I can't name another word. I mean, that's, you know. Yeah.
- 30:10Speaker 1: Well, here's what's amazing about The Gringo Poppy. This is
- 30:12Speaker 1: what's truly amazing about it, okay?
- 30:15Speaker 2: You're watching it. And you're in kind of, it's, it's,
- 30:22Speaker 2: you're in a little bit of disbelief. Yeah. Because it is.
- 30:27Speaker 1: I wonder, and I know he's trying to get good
- 30:29Speaker 1: at stand-up, and I respect the hell out of that.
- 30:31Speaker 2: The question is, did it have to be a special? No.
- 30:34Speaker 2: That's the real question.
- 30:36Speaker 3: No.
- 30:36Speaker 2: No, it didn't. Yeah. And I know one of these
- 30:38Speaker 2: guys who, like, hates on Brennan. That's not shitting on him.
- 30:41Speaker 2: He's a nice guy, and I know he's trying to,
- 30:43Speaker 2: you know, like.
- 30:44Speaker 1: But the question is, with that particular thing, you go,
- 30:46Speaker 1: did that have to be.
- 30:47Speaker 3: I said this on Realize Podcast. He should have friends going...
- 30:50Speaker 3: Because here's the thing. He is a charming dude, right?
- 30:51Speaker 2: Yes. And he.
- 30:54Speaker 3: I think... I don't know at all, you know, but
- 30:56Speaker 3: I think... there's probably something that he's probably a funny,
- 30:59Speaker 3: he probably makes his friends laugh, right?
- 31:00Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that he's really great at podcasting on
- 31:04Speaker 1: that specific show for that audience.
- 31:07Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 31:07Speaker 1: Which they want MMA. There's an audience of people in
- 31:11Speaker 1: America that want what he does.
- 31:13Speaker 2: Yeah. And he does it for them. I am not
- 31:15Speaker 2: that audience. Of course. But that's fair. But that's fair.
- 31:17Speaker 2: And here's the thing.
- 31:18Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 31:18Speaker 2: We all go out. Because I don't care about.
- 31:20Speaker 3: Everyone stinks at comedy for the first five, ten years.
- 31:23Speaker 2: 20, 30 years.
- 31:24Speaker 3: There's a fucking minimum of five. If you get good
- 31:28Speaker 3: and start getting shit.
- 31:29Speaker 2: Under five. That's like fast. It's rare. That's fast. Michael Che.
- 31:34Speaker 2: Who's my best friend. And he's one of the people.
- 31:36Speaker 3: You're talking about guys that they got like.
- 31:38Speaker 2: It's rare. Very rare. Yeah. Very rare.
- 31:40Speaker 3: And you see it and you're like, God damn, those
- 31:42Speaker 3: guys got good and they got good fast and they
- 31:43Speaker 3: started getting things.
- 31:44Speaker 2: I was pretty rare.
- 31:46Speaker 1: I got pretty good pretty quickly. But again, I didn't
- 31:49Speaker 1: really pop until I started doing this.
- 31:51Speaker 2: Yeah. Of course. That was what I needed to do.
- 31:54Speaker 3: So, but that's the thing that's like.
- 31:55Speaker 2: Because stand-up is kind of gay and stupid. Stand-up, when
- 31:57Speaker 2: we came up, you didn't even... Stand-up's kind of gay
- 31:59Speaker 2: and dumb. Yeah. Let's be honest. It's... When I watch
- 32:03Speaker 2: Brendan do that.
- 32:05Speaker 1: It's like I go, here's a big tough guy who
- 32:09Speaker 1: I should just see in a Ferrari and he should
- 32:12Speaker 1: be able to rip people's faces off with his catcher mid-hands.
- 32:16Speaker 2: And I see him running around the stage going, I go,
- 32:20Speaker 2: you're gay now. You've become gay. Why are you gay?
- 32:23Speaker 2: He was a fucking knight. He was a knight. He
- 32:27Speaker 2: was a knight. He's a knight. And now he's a jester.
- 32:30Speaker 2: Now he's gay. He's a gay jester. He's a gay man.
- 32:34Speaker 2: He's a fully gay man. When you watch a special,
- 32:37Speaker 2: he's like, woo! And you go, what, why? What is
- 32:42Speaker 2: this disease? Maybe they should come out next week. What
- 32:45Speaker 2: is this disease?
- 32:46Speaker 3: You're six foot six, you're an Adonis, you could beat
- 32:49Speaker 3: up 99% of the.
- 32:50Speaker 2: People in the world. You could kill men and fuck women,
- 32:52Speaker 2: and you don't have to fuck these skanks at the
- 32:54Speaker 2: comedy store! Fuck hot women. Annie Letterman? Fuck hot women.
- 32:58Speaker 2: What the fuck is wrong with you? And instead, he's
- 33:02Speaker 2: fully gay on stage in Dallas in front of 45
- 33:07Speaker 2: people being like, the lion is at my door. It's just,
- 33:14Speaker 2: it's puzzling.
- 33:15Speaker 3: It's, yeah, you don't need it. When you don't need it.
- 33:18Speaker 2: But that's the thing.
- 33:19Speaker 3: Like, you know, I feel bad shitting on his comedy
- 33:23Speaker 3: because I don't shit on people's comedy.
- 33:25Speaker 2: No, no, no, no. Me saying you shouldn't be a
- 33:27Speaker 2: comedian is the highest respect I can pay you. Yeah.
- 33:31Speaker 2: If I look at you and go, you shouldn't really
- 33:33Speaker 2: do comedy, it's me going, you are better than this.
- 33:37Speaker 2: I truly believe he's like better than this. Until you
- 33:41Speaker 2: start to do this.
- 33:42Speaker 3: This was nobody's A plan.
- 33:44Speaker 2: Nobody.
- 33:45Speaker 3: No, I was in a little kid being like, dude,
- 33:46Speaker 3: I want to fucking dance like a monkey for strangers.
- 33:49Speaker 2: Right.
- 33:49Speaker 3: And pray to God that they like me and that
- 33:51Speaker 3: they react to my words in a club.
- 33:53Speaker 2: Yes.
- 33:54Speaker 3: Or I won't feel anything.
- 33:55Speaker 2: That's right. That's crazy.
- 33:56Speaker 3: That's a fucking, that's pathetic. Really, honestly, if aliens came
- 33:59Speaker 3: down and watched us doing comedy.
- 34:01Speaker 2: It's gay. Making these sounds. And I don't even mean
- 34:03Speaker 2: gay like having sex with men. I mean like it's
- 34:05Speaker 2: just cringe. Yeah. A little. Yeah. It's a little pathetic.
- 34:09Speaker 2: I feel embarrassed that I need the validation of strangers.
- 34:12Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 34:12Speaker 2: And others should too. And even though we make people happy. Yeah.
- 34:15Speaker 2: It comes from the need. Yeah. And I just feel
- 34:18Speaker 2: like knowing that.
- 34:20Speaker 3: I would give up your happiness forever. for my happiness.
- 34:23Speaker 3: Just so everyone knows, their happiness is inconsequential in this.
- 34:26Speaker 2: It means nothing to any, like what people say to me,
- 34:28Speaker 2: they're like, your podcast got me through the quarantine. I'm like,
- 34:32Speaker 2: you have no idea what it's done for me.
- 34:33Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm glad it's helped you, and it makes
- 34:37Speaker 1: me feel good that it's helped them, but I'm like,
- 34:39Speaker 1: to be honest.
- 34:39Speaker 2: It helped you cope with your mom dying. Yeah, I'm like,
- 34:43Speaker 2: I'm glad it helped you, but it really helped me,
- 34:45Speaker 2: you know?
- 34:46Speaker 3: Oh, dude, I'm fucking having a weird fucking muscle spasm
- 34:50Speaker 3: in my stomach.
- 34:51Speaker 2: Why?
- 34:51Speaker 3: Because I did sit-ups for the first time ever.
- 34:54Speaker 2: Oh. Not ever, like yesterday. But my point is that
- 34:57Speaker 2: when I tell somebody, hey, Stan, it may not be
- 34:59Speaker 2: for you, it's not an egg.
- 35:02Speaker 3: No, it's not. And yeah, whatever. You just don't need
- 35:04Speaker 3: to put out specials. David Tell puts out a special.
- 35:06Speaker 2: Every eight years. And he's one of the greatest of
- 35:08Speaker 2: all time.
- 35:08Speaker 3: Why is Brandon Shaw putting out two specials in two years?
- 35:10Speaker 1: I don't even love the special that I just shot.
- 35:12Speaker 1: And it's coming out because here's the deal. It's like
- 35:15Speaker 1: I wrote the material two years ago. You saw the
- 35:17Speaker 1: jokes two years ago at Vinnie Brand's Stress Factory. But
- 35:20Speaker 1: my whole thing is I want to do it live
- 35:21Speaker 1: as much as I can. So by the time the
- 35:23Speaker 1: special comes out, a lot of it's topical.
- 35:24Speaker 2: It's irrelevant. I don't love it. I didn't love the audience.
- 35:27Speaker 2: I didn't love it. It is what it is. But,
- 35:30Speaker 2: you know, whatever people want to do with their lives,
- 35:34Speaker 2: it can do. Yeah.
- 35:35Speaker 1: Of course.
- 35:36Speaker 2: We live in America. More power to them. Yeah, we
- 35:38Speaker 2: live in America. More power to them. Yeah, for sure.
- 35:40Speaker 2: Where do you think Brandon Shaw went on vacation? somewhere
- 35:45Speaker 2: nice probably somewhere.
- 35:46Speaker 1: Probably somewhere nice everybody's trying to steal your information companies
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- 38:27Speaker 3: Where'd you go on vacation as a kid?
- 38:28Speaker 2: The Enchanted Forest. Look this up.
- 38:30Speaker 1: This is a place called the Enchanted Forest. My parents
- 38:32Speaker 1: took me there. I'm almost positive they were trying to
- 38:33Speaker 1: sell me to human traffickers.
- 38:35Speaker 2: Is this a renaissance type fair? It's, where is it, Ben? Yeah,
- 38:40Speaker 2: this says it's in Oregon, but are you talking about
- 38:42Speaker 2: when you went to Germany?
- 38:43Speaker 1: No, it's like in like, fuck, it's in like upstate
- 38:47Speaker 1: New York. And it was by Canada, maybe it's in
- 38:50Speaker 1: upstate New York. And it was like this weird place
- 38:53Speaker 1: that they, I'm pretty sure they.
- 38:54Speaker 2: Were trying to sell me. Enchanted Forest Water Safari? Yeah, it's, yeah.
- 38:58Speaker 2: And Old Forge? Yeah, yeah, Old Forge, this place. Okay.
- 39:01Speaker 2: The Enchanted Forest, it's like a water park. That's probably
- 39:06Speaker 2: pretty cool though. It's whatever. When you're a kid, it
- 39:08Speaker 2: was probably cool. Yeah, they got this guy, Paul Bunyan.
- 39:12Speaker 1: It was like one of those things where I think
- 39:14Speaker 1: they thought it was going to be good.
- 39:16Speaker 2: Like, that's the other thing.
- 39:17Speaker 3: You know it sucks when like the coolest characters they
- 39:19Speaker 3: have are like old, Yeah, it's like Humpty Dumpty.
- 39:22Speaker 2: Like they couldn't afford. They couldn't get anybody better. Like
- 39:25Speaker 2: Sesame Place.
- 39:26Speaker 1: Yeah, no.
- 39:27Speaker 2: We'd do that.
- 39:28Speaker 1: We went to Hershey Park. We went to Sesame Place.
- 39:32Speaker 1: We went to... My dad, when they got divorced, my
- 39:36Speaker 1: dad took me to cool places. Because then it was like, okay,
- 39:39Speaker 1: I don't have to deal with your mother.
- 39:40Speaker 3: So then he took me to nice... Here's what happens
- 39:44Speaker 3: when you're a divorced dad. Me and my son's mother,
- 39:47Speaker 3: we co-parent. And I do a Father's Day trip with
- 39:50Speaker 3: him every year.
- 39:50Speaker 2: Yeah. And I just let him spin the globe. That's right. Wow.
- 39:54Speaker 3: Wherever he wants to go. Wherever he wants to go.
- 39:55Speaker 1: Whoa.
- 39:56Speaker 2: And look, he's stupid. He's nine. He's a child. Right.
- 39:58Speaker 2: And he can't spin that much.
- 40:00Speaker 3: I can fucking sort of goad him into.
- 40:03Speaker 2: What if he spins a globe and he's like, I
- 40:04Speaker 2: want to go to Sierra Leone. I want to go
- 40:06Speaker 2: to the diamond mines. I want to find blood diamonds.
- 40:11Speaker 1: But my dad would take me to nice places because
- 40:14Speaker 1: my mother wasn't involved.
- 40:15Speaker 3: Well, and he wants to say, it's a fuck you
- 40:17Speaker 3: to the mom. I want my son, when he grows up.
- 40:21Speaker 2: To be able to tell his mother, I went to
- 40:22Speaker 2: all these places without you. I went to fucking Rome
- 40:25Speaker 2: this summer because my dad took me to Rome. I'm
- 40:27Speaker 2: telling you, a great kid's trip, and I told Louis,
- 40:30Speaker 2: is Australia. Yeah. Because it's just too far, but it's
- 40:33Speaker 2: a great kid's trip because the animals, all that stuff,
- 40:36Speaker 2: the zoos. It's a very cool trip. You know, it's
- 40:40Speaker 2: very cool.
- 40:41Speaker 3: It's just a lot to 20 hours on a flight
- 40:43Speaker 3: with a kid.
- 40:44Speaker 2: It's too much.
- 40:45Speaker 3: Yeah. He's a little bit older. I'll do it with
- 40:47Speaker 3: him for sure. He's a mature kid, too.
- 40:48Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 40:48Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 40:49Speaker 2: We're going to Rome this summer. That's amazing.
- 40:52Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 40:52Speaker 1: My parents never took me. I mean, we took one
- 40:54Speaker 1: trip to Europe. when I was five that my grandfather
- 40:57Speaker 1: paid for, and the whole family went. And I was
- 40:59Speaker 1: so sick, the doctor goes, don't put him on a plane.
- 41:02Speaker 2: And my mother and father went, well, we're going to Europe.
- 41:04Speaker 2: So he's going to Europe.
- 41:05Speaker 1: So there's literally a photo of me on Instagram a
- 41:07Speaker 1: long time ago where I'm literally like a sick four-year-old
- 41:11Speaker 1: on a cross, you know, going overseas to Europe.
- 41:14Speaker 3: Yeah, that's crazy. I didn't fly until I was 19.
- 41:17Speaker 3: 19 was the first time I was on a flight.
- 41:20Speaker 3: I went to Fort Lauderdale, Florida. Yeah. With my girlfriend. Yeah.
- 41:25Speaker 3: It was her graduation trip. I had graduated the year before.
- 41:28Speaker 2: Right. It was my girl.
- 41:30Speaker 3: And then the lead singer of Coheed and Cambria.
- 41:33Speaker 2: Oh.
- 41:33Speaker 3: Was dating my girlfriend's best friend. So he was on
- 41:35Speaker 3: this trip as well.
- 41:36Speaker 2: Oh, interesting.
- 41:36Speaker 3: He has no Coheed and Cambria.
- 41:38Speaker 2: I've heard of them. It's like a gay, emo-y type.
- 41:41Speaker 2: They do okay, right? They're great.
- 41:42Speaker 3: They're really talented. They're very progressive, almost like a new
- 41:45Speaker 3: age Rush.
- 41:46Speaker 2: Okay. They're fucking, yeah. I don't care. Yeah. They were cool. Well, good.
- 41:53Speaker 3: That was my first time on a flight.
- 41:54Speaker 1: It's difficult right now with the, you know, a lot
- 42:00Speaker 1: of families are having a tough time taking their kids,
- 42:04Speaker 1: you know, places. Yeah.
- 42:06Speaker 2: And that, I think, can be alleviated a little bit
- 42:10Speaker 2: by trying to figure out. Like, let's look up where
- 42:14Speaker 2: you went. You went to a place.
- 42:15Speaker 4: Okay, so people confuse Port Aransas and South Padre Island.
- 42:19Speaker 4: South Padre is actually nice. And people give me a
- 42:22Speaker 4: lot of shit for saying South Padre.
- 42:23Speaker 2: No, it's not. First of all, it's not nice. I
- 42:25Speaker 2: don't think it is. People giving you shit are animals.
- 42:27Speaker 2: Shut the fuck up. Yeah, because this is South Padre Island.
- 42:29Speaker 1: There's nine nice places in the country. The Hamptons, Malibu,
- 42:32Speaker 1: Beverly Hills, Palm Beach, Jackson Hole, Aspen. There's like 10
- 42:36Speaker 1: places that are fucking nice.
- 42:37Speaker 2: And Florida. Parts of it. So the place I went actually. Yeah.
- 42:42Speaker 3: Yeah, this shit's all, everything you guys are naming is
- 42:45Speaker 3: fancy as fuck to me.
- 42:46Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 42:46Speaker 3: It's like, you know, we seem to go on vacations.
- 42:49Speaker 3: We didn't go to Six Flags.
- 42:50Speaker 1: By the way, they're making this look better in the things.
- 42:53Speaker 1: They do this all the time. They lighten the water.
- 42:55Speaker 2: They make it look a certain type of blue, and
- 42:56Speaker 2: then you get there, and it's not that. That's what
- 42:59Speaker 2: it is. And then that's what it ends up being.
- 43:01Speaker 2: So that's what it is. That's what it is. Yeah.
- 43:04Speaker 2: That's what it is. And then Ben would go there
- 43:06Speaker 2: with his family. They'd stay in like a motel and
- 43:09Speaker 2: they'd eat like, what would you eat? Like imitation crab.
- 43:12Speaker 2: They would eat like fake crab. And that's rough. I
- 43:17Speaker 2: never had it that bad.
- 43:19Speaker 1: Like other than my mother was a schizophrenic and my family,
- 43:21Speaker 1: I had a very loveless family of people who hated
- 43:25Speaker 1: each other. And I had the gay thing where you
- 43:28Speaker 1: had to stay, keep who you are secretive.
- 43:30Speaker 2: And I was a drug addict, but I, We never
- 43:33Speaker 2: were there.
- 43:35Speaker 3: Was there anybody who found out you were gay before
- 43:37Speaker 3: you came out and you were like, dude, you got
- 43:38Speaker 3: to fucking keep this under wraps?
- 43:39Speaker 2: A few people I sucked off had suspicions. They were suspicious,
- 43:45Speaker 2: but they didn't go. No.
- 43:49Speaker 1: I mean, there are people that thought so, but nobody
- 43:51Speaker 1: found out. To find out, you'd have to have proof.
- 43:54Speaker 3: I didn't believe you were gay for like a year.
- 43:56Speaker 2: Yeah. He's not gay. No, I mean, it's still very
- 44:00Speaker 2: much people don't believe it. But it's only because they
- 44:02Speaker 2: don't know people. Like, if you meet people, you meet
- 44:06Speaker 2: gay people that are not like what you see on TV.
- 44:08Speaker 3: Well, I think that's an act. Very often, it's performative.
- 44:10Speaker 2: Very often.
- 44:11Speaker 1: Some of it is, but some guys are just very feminine,
- 44:13Speaker 1: but then some guys take it to the next level.
- 44:14Speaker 2: Well, they lean into it. They lean into it. There's
- 44:16Speaker 2: a choice at one point. All black, like, gangsters, if
- 44:19Speaker 2: you're really black, you're leaning into it. Yeah. Like, if
- 44:22Speaker 2: you're really, you know what I mean? I watch people,
- 44:25Speaker 2: I watch like... You got people that lean in.
- 44:27Speaker 3: Dude, I watch some of my black friends, and they... they,
- 44:32Speaker 3: I watched them write like in Ebonics on like social media.
- 44:35Speaker 3: And I'm like, I know you have autocorrect, you have
- 44:37Speaker 3: to go through so much trouble to write that way.
- 44:42Speaker 2: Yeah, why would you spend the time? It's so much
- 44:45Speaker 2: more effort to fucking write that. But it's that identity.
- 44:48Speaker 3: Yeah, it's an identity and you lean into it.
- 44:49Speaker 2: But you, what's.
- 44:50Speaker 1: Interesting about you is you're a Puerto Rican white supremacist.
- 44:54Speaker 1: You know, as it says in the press.
- 44:56Speaker 3: No, I'm a truth teller.
- 44:58Speaker 2: Right.
- 45:00Speaker 1: But what's interesting about you is you and me bond
- 45:03Speaker 1: in this way. That stuff's gross to us. When the
- 45:06Speaker 1: identity politics gets... Like, we're not ashamed of who we are.
- 45:09Speaker 1: We don't hide any of it. Yes, I pretend to
- 45:13Speaker 1: have a wife. And yes, you tell people you're Italian.
- 45:16Speaker 2: But... No, but we don't... There's something about us. We
- 45:20Speaker 2: just went out into the group thing. No, we're not.
- 45:22Speaker 3: Groups don't... I think social media is training people to,
- 45:27Speaker 3: you know, put themselves out there in a certain way, right?
- 45:29Speaker 2: And you and I both, right?
- 45:32Speaker 3: I think we recognize.
- 45:35Speaker 3: Number one, what's funnier, but what's better, what's more relatable
- 45:38Speaker 3: to sort of like really be much more real versions
- 45:41Speaker 3: of ourselves. You get a very real version of me
- 45:43Speaker 3: and a very real version of you on these shows, right?
- 45:45Speaker 3: I think, you know, a lot of other people, they're
- 45:48Speaker 3: very protected in what they do and how they present themselves.
- 45:52Speaker 3: And in comedy, it's less so. I think comedy and podcasting,
- 45:54Speaker 3: much less so. And I think you and I, much
- 45:56Speaker 3: less so than a lot of our peers. Yeah, our
- 45:59Speaker 3: peers that do it as well. So, you know, that's...
- 46:02Speaker 3: You know, that's, you know, it's just phoniness. You know,
- 46:05Speaker 3: you sort of see, I tweeted this the other day.
- 46:06Speaker 2: Like, Mark Normand is a black woman. You would never know.
- 46:10Speaker 2: You have no idea who he is. No, I don't know.
- 46:12Speaker 3: But I tweeted this the other day. You see people who,
- 46:14Speaker 3: on Instagram, will respond to every comment, right? So somebody
- 46:18Speaker 3: will write a comment, and then they'll write heart face, emoji, whatever.
- 46:20Speaker 3: Thank you, love you. And what those people are doing
- 46:23Speaker 3: is they're manipulating the algorithm. Like, Instagram will move your
- 46:27Speaker 3: content further up. and show it to more people if
- 46:30Speaker 3: you're engaging with everybody, right? So it's just, and it's
- 46:33Speaker 3: a sociopathic thing, and it's usually like hot chicks, but
- 46:36Speaker 3: they respond to everything, and they're like, heart, love you,
- 46:38Speaker 3: thank you. And you're like, dude, you're just like blind,
- 46:40Speaker 3: you know, like blindly just going and saying that to
- 46:43Speaker 3: everybody to, and pretending to like these people and pretending
- 46:46Speaker 3: to have a real relationship with them just to manipulate
- 46:48Speaker 3: an algorithm.
- 46:49Speaker 2: It's sick. It's sickening. It's really sick. It's fucking psychotic.
- 46:52Speaker 2: It's crazy. So, yeah. But we see people do very
- 46:55Speaker 2: well like that. No, no, no.
- 46:57Speaker 3: Anybody who's famous on Instagram, any Instagram model, any TikToker,
- 47:00Speaker 3: they all do that.
- 47:01Speaker 2: That's all they do.
- 47:02Speaker 3: That's all they do. It's a part of their job.
- 47:04Speaker 3: But the same way you have to fucking, you're in
- 47:05Speaker 3: your job, you answer emails in the morning, it's their
- 47:07Speaker 3: job to go in. Very often they have social media
- 47:10Speaker 3: managers that are doing it and they respond to every
- 47:12Speaker 3: single thing.
- 47:13Speaker 2: You'll see it.
- 47:13Speaker 3: Yeah. Any influencer, they respond to every single thing.
- 47:16Speaker 2: And what.
- 47:17Speaker 1: And it just, again, I guess it just bolsters this
- 47:20Speaker 1: idea that this community you're part of, you're an active
- 47:24Speaker 1: member of it.
- 47:25Speaker 2: Well, I think most people go, oh, they responded. This
- 47:27Speaker 2: is great.
- 47:27Speaker 3: And they feel that thing. And that's why they're there almost, right?
- 47:30Speaker 2: And then it's reciprocal.
- 47:31Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 47:31Speaker 2: And then they respond. Yeah. But I don't know, dude.
- 47:34Speaker 2: I just.
- 47:35Speaker 3: I respond to a lot of people on social media,
- 47:37Speaker 3: but not everybody. It's just not a fucking, you know,
- 47:39Speaker 3: like if somebody sends me a DM, if I'm in,
- 47:41Speaker 3: if I'm traveling, you might get a response very often.
- 47:44Speaker 2: I'll respond occasionally. Yeah, dude.
- 47:45Speaker 3: Just some random fucking person and be like, oh, thanks dude.
- 47:47Speaker 3: Appreciate it. Yeah. But then, you know, it bites you
- 47:49Speaker 3: in the ass. I have a guy right now. I
- 47:51Speaker 3: wish you, dude, I guess he DM me a while
- 47:54Speaker 3: ago and I responded. Then he DM me again. I
- 47:55Speaker 3: was like driving or something and I just saw it.
- 47:57Speaker 2: I didn't say anything. It's fine. Whatever.
- 47:59Speaker 3: And then he fucking DMs me again, because I saw
- 48:01Speaker 3: that with middle fingers, like, oh, dude, I guess you're
- 48:03Speaker 3: too cool for me now. Like, dude, we're not friends.
- 48:06Speaker 3: I responded to you once. So whatever, dude. You're damned
- 48:10Speaker 3: if you don't. But I don't fucking play those games
- 48:13Speaker 3: where you're trying to just manipulate an algorithm.
- 48:16Speaker 2: You're trying to.
- 48:17Speaker 3: you know, trying to game the system instead of just
- 48:19Speaker 3: being good, instead of being funny or being interesting, it's
- 48:22Speaker 3: a lot of gaming the system.
- 48:23Speaker 2: And that's what LA is a lot of, right? For sure.
- 48:25Speaker 3: There's a lot of people that they didn't come up
- 48:28Speaker 3: and they didn't go through those months where they were fucking,
- 48:30Speaker 3: they didn't know where they were going to eat. They
- 48:31Speaker 3: didn't know how they were going to fucking pay their rent.
- 48:33Speaker 3: They didn't even, you know, they just, you know, it
- 48:36Speaker 3: worked out very quickly for a lot of these people,
- 48:38Speaker 3: you know, and it was a lot less of a
- 48:40Speaker 3: struggle out here, it seems.
- 48:41Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 48:42Speaker 1: A lot of people out here, but the flip side
- 48:47Speaker 1: of that, Or maybe the full picture of that is
- 48:52Speaker 1: that a lot of those people are dead inside in
- 48:54Speaker 1: ways you can't even imagine. Yeah. Like their material successes
- 49:00Speaker 1: do not even, they don't belie.
- 49:02Speaker 2: Like the idea, these people are husks, cold husks of
- 49:06Speaker 2: human beings.
- 49:07Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 49:08Speaker 2: That don't... Like, the success doesn't even matter anymore because
- 49:11Speaker 2: they have forgotten everything organically about who they are and everything.
- 49:18Speaker 2: And it's interesting. And they're just kind of... all on
- 49:20Speaker 2: some low dose of some type of drug.
- 49:22Speaker 3: You made an interesting point before we were driving, just
- 49:25Speaker 3: talking about how you got to pay for it.
- 49:27Speaker 2: We owe debts. We owe debts. Can you get me
- 49:30Speaker 2: a lighter, please? Why aren't there lighters in the studio? Wow.
- 49:35Speaker 2: You know what it is? You want to talk about
- 49:40Speaker 2: ungrateful and like absurd. And, oh, maybe it's in my car.
- 49:46Speaker 2: Maybe it's in my car. I mean, there should be letters.
- 49:49Speaker 2: But again, it's like, it's, I mean, this guy, you
- 49:53Speaker 2: want to talk about someone who's went on a nice ride.
- 49:57Speaker 2: I mean, you know, I mean- Anybody could do this, Ben.
- 50:02Speaker 2: Just so you know. Yeah. Let's just say all podcast producers,
- 50:06Speaker 2: anyone can do your job. Very few people can do
- 50:09Speaker 2: what we do. Very few people can do my job.
- 50:12Speaker 2: Anyone can do the podcast producer job. But they don't
- 50:14Speaker 2: think that. It's self-taught. At this point, the technology is not,
- 50:17Speaker 2: it's intuitive. They think it's their show. No, all of
- 50:21Speaker 2: these people, from Jamie Vernon on down, they think it's
- 50:25Speaker 2: their show.
- 50:25Speaker 3: You know what it is, dude? They have to feel
- 50:27Speaker 3: that way in order to be good at their job.
- 50:29Speaker 2: And he's great at his job. But anybody can do it. Well,
- 50:33Speaker 2: who would else be great at his job? It's an app. Anybody.
- 50:36Speaker 2: A laugh app, where I would say something funny, I'd
- 50:37Speaker 2: press it, and go... They would do this when I
- 50:41Speaker 2: worked at Equinox.
- 50:41Speaker 3: My last day job ever was working at Equinox selling
- 50:44Speaker 3: gym memberships. And every department, they would give you like
- 50:48Speaker 3: a Braveheart speech, right? They'd be like, oh, the fucking,
- 50:51Speaker 3: you know, the front desk, you guys are the heartbeat
- 50:53Speaker 3: of this club. You're the first people that they see.
- 50:55Speaker 3: Without you guys, this club doesn't exist. Same exact fucking
- 50:57Speaker 3: speech to the sales people, same speech to the group
- 50:59Speaker 3: fitness people, same speech to the maintenance people. Without the
- 51:01Speaker 3: maintenance people.
- 51:02Speaker 2: Yeah, without the maintenance people, Equinox, you're the beating heart
- 51:07Speaker 2: of Equinox, the maintenance people.
- 51:10Speaker 3: They did, and you'd see these old Mexican ladies, they'd
- 51:13Speaker 3: fucking have this sense of pride.
- 51:16Speaker 2: We are the first line of defense. You're the Marines
- 51:19Speaker 2: of the toilet.
- 51:22Speaker 3: And they would feel, but everyone would have this sense
- 51:24Speaker 3: of pride And together they all came, they create a
- 51:26Speaker 3: fucking great business. A really legitimately great business. So you
- 51:30Speaker 3: have to make, he's a front desk. Ben is a
- 51:32Speaker 3: front desk girl at Equinox.
- 51:34Speaker 2: That's right. That's what he is. He's a hot piece
- 51:36Speaker 2: of ass at Equinox.
- 51:36Speaker 3: He's cute, but he's the fucking first person they see
- 51:39Speaker 3: and he should feel important.
- 51:43Speaker 2: Because it's not a bad job to be the front
- 51:45Speaker 2: desk at Equinox.
- 51:45Speaker 3: They can hire another hot girl, sure.
- 51:47Speaker 2: Yeah, but you're here. You're here. You know what, Jessica?
- 51:53Speaker 2: You're here. And you know what it is?
- 51:55Speaker 1: They could hire some other big-titted bitch. And Ben does
- 51:59Speaker 1: a lot more. He edits, he did things like that.
- 52:01Speaker 1: But the front desk at Equinox does a lot more, too.
- 52:03Speaker 2: Yeah, dude.
- 52:03Speaker 3: It's not just checking people in, dude. They have to,
- 52:05Speaker 3: I believe they have to.
- 52:06Speaker 2: They know the whole gym. They know the property well.
- 52:08Speaker 2: They have to answer the phone. And they use the
- 52:09Speaker 2: word the property. They have to learn. They'll be like,
- 52:11Speaker 2: I know the property. I know the gym. Like, yeah,
- 52:13Speaker 2: they learn.
- 52:13Speaker 3: They're the liaison between new members and the salespeople.
- 52:16Speaker 2: Right. Come on. No. Yeah.
- 52:18Speaker 3: They're important.
- 52:19Speaker 2: It's an important job. Jamie Vernon, like, we were talking once,
- 52:21Speaker 2: and I wanted to end it. Jamie Vernon's like, you know,
- 52:24Speaker 2: our show and our show. And I go, what are you?
- 52:26Speaker 2: You say our show. Oh, excuse me. Excuse me.
- 52:31Speaker 3: That's what happened to Red Band. That's why he's on
- 52:32Speaker 3: the fucking Outskies.
- 52:33Speaker 2: Right.
- 52:34Speaker 3: He got too cocky. That's why Jamie needs to not
- 52:37Speaker 3: go down the Red Band path. He's going to be
- 52:38Speaker 3: producing fucking.
- 52:41Speaker 1: Well, Joe, what I mean, I don't want to even
- 52:43Speaker 1: get into these statistics because they're troubling. But it just
- 52:46Speaker 1: came out that Joe is now getting 500 listeners an episode.
- 52:54Speaker 2: It's over. This is statistics. This isn't me. These are statistics.
- 52:59Speaker 3: I won't even do the show anymore. He calls me
- 53:01Speaker 3: all the time. Lewis will not do it. He fucking
- 53:03Speaker 3: calls me all the time. I'm like, no, Joe, beat it.
- 53:05Speaker 3: I wrote, who dis? New phone.
- 53:07Speaker 2: How do we get you in touch with him? Because
- 53:08Speaker 2: he's not responding to you.
- 53:09Speaker 3: He will not respond to me. Can you call him
- 53:12Speaker 3: right now and ask him why on speaker?
- 53:14Speaker 2: Okay. No, you're not going to. He really will. Hello. Hi.
- 53:21Speaker 2: Who's this? Who is it? Yeah, no. Who is it?
- 53:26Speaker 2: I think we can. Is this Louis? How about this?
- 53:29Speaker 3: Remember how he was going to sneak Anthony Cumia back
- 53:32Speaker 3: into Sirius XM?
- 53:33Speaker 2: I didn't.
- 53:34Speaker 3: I don't. So when Anthony got fired from Sirius XM,
- 53:36Speaker 3: he went on Jim and Sam. And he was going
- 53:39Speaker 3: to sneak Anthony back in with him.
- 53:42Speaker 2: Oh. The whole fucking thing. Why don't we sneak me in?
- 53:45Speaker 3: Next time he does one of those fun Comic Hang
- 53:47Speaker 3: podcasts with Ari and Norman.
- 53:49Speaker 2: Tim got so much fatter. I'm just under a coat. No,
- 53:54Speaker 2: it's Lewis. Watch out, man. That would be hilarious. Well,
- 53:59Speaker 2: you should move to Austin. Yeah, that's it. Then he
- 54:01Speaker 2: can't avoid me. If you move to Austin. By the way,
- 54:05Speaker 2: it would be hilarious if you moved to Austin and
- 54:07Speaker 2: he still would not even acknowledge you. No. And every
- 54:10Speaker 2: Instagram post was like, you're just like, just bought a
- 54:12Speaker 2: house in Austin.
- 54:12Speaker 3: He's like, you know who should buy a house? Doug Stanhope.
- 54:16Speaker 3: Stanhope should buy a house in Austin now.
- 54:18Speaker 2: Yeah, you literally get a job doing maintenance on his building.
- 54:22Speaker 2: You're literally pushing a broom in the building. He won't
- 54:24Speaker 2: look at me. No, he won't even look at you
- 54:25Speaker 2: in the face. He has two Navy SEALs stand between
- 54:28Speaker 2: him and you at all times.
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- 55:52Speaker 1: What about, what do you think, what's going to happen now?
- 55:56Speaker 1: If you, I feel like, what is, because this whole
- 56:00Speaker 1: LA podcast scene is, does seem a little bit dead.
- 56:03Speaker 2: It's gay. They're all gay.
- 56:05Speaker 3: They're all gay. They're, you know, I'm not even, and
- 56:09Speaker 3: I won't even name specific names, but the whole drama
- 56:12Speaker 3: that's going on in the LA podcast scene, it's one
- 56:14Speaker 3: of the gayest things I've ever seen. This is like
- 56:15Speaker 3: high school level drama.
- 56:17Speaker 2: It's so silly.
- 56:17Speaker 3: Where they're like calling each other and they're talking shit
- 56:19Speaker 3: and they're threatening each other and it, It's like, guys.
- 56:22Speaker 2: In New York, the drama is all of you can't
- 56:24Speaker 2: afford your rent. Yeah. So it's actually real drama. Like
- 56:27Speaker 2: the New York podcast scene is somebody being like, I
- 56:30Speaker 2: am homeless. It's a weird thing. Yeah.
- 56:33Speaker 3: It's a weird thing how everyone is so poor in
- 56:35Speaker 3: New York.
- 56:35Speaker 1: This is people in mansions talking shit about each other.
- 56:37Speaker 1: In New York, the drama is like, my parents just
- 56:39Speaker 1: kicked me off the family.
- 56:41Speaker 2: Plan and I'm 38. I'm 38 and I don't have
- 56:44Speaker 2: a phone.
- 56:46Speaker 3: My roommate moved out and I was not able to
- 56:48Speaker 3: secure another roommate for that room this month. I'm actually
- 56:51Speaker 3: going to kill myself.
- 56:52Speaker 2: New York drama is like people hang themselves. People try
- 56:56Speaker 2: to kill themselves. Yeah. My bed is covered in rat feces.
- 57:02Speaker 2: I just, you know what it is.
- 57:03Speaker 3: The best thing about New York, dude, you go to like,
- 57:04Speaker 3: people who have money, too. Like, Big Jay's got money.
- 57:07Speaker 2: Big Jay has money. Because he's got talent.
- 57:09Speaker 3: He's got a nice apartment.
- 57:09Speaker 1: Big Jay is one of the funniest people on planet Earth.
- 57:12Speaker 2: But it's not nice. This is what New York is, dude.
- 57:13Speaker 2: New York's nothing's nice. You're like, everything's expensive. And you're like,
- 57:16Speaker 2: this sucks. It's dirty. There's garbage everywhere in front of
- 57:20Speaker 2: your building. To house money in New York, you have
- 57:22Speaker 2: to have like $ 100 million. It's fucking wild, dude. It's crazy.
- 57:25Speaker 2: It's a wild thing.
- 57:26Speaker 3: And you go down to Tribeca, one of the most
- 57:27Speaker 3: expensive neighborhoods in New York, everything looks like shit, dude.
- 57:31Speaker 2: It looks like a heroin den everywhere. Yeah. It's like,
- 57:34Speaker 2: this is like one of the most expensive buildings. You're like,
- 57:36Speaker 2: what the fuck is going on?
- 57:37Speaker 3: It's tiny.
- 57:37Speaker 2: Yeah. It's true. It's wild. Well, it's just a different life. Yeah.
- 57:42Speaker 2: It's a different life and it makes you funnier. It does.
- 57:47Speaker 2: But the funniest people in the world come from LA.
- 57:51Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 57:53Speaker 2: The funniest people in the world are good looking surfers
- 57:57Speaker 2: and people that are mixed martial artists. Yeah. That's where
- 58:00Speaker 2: funny comes from. Funny comes from hot people. LA just
- 58:04Speaker 2: needs to struggle a little more. Funny comes from when
- 58:06Speaker 2: hot people get bored. If we know one thing about comedy,
- 58:09Speaker 2: it's when a hot person is bored, that's when the
- 58:11Speaker 2: genius comes.
- 58:12Speaker 3: Yeah, it's true.
- 58:13Speaker 1: When a hot person has nothing to do that day,
- 58:15Speaker 1: they open their mouth and the genius comes out.
- 58:19Speaker 3: The biggest struggle for LA comedians, this is the one
- 58:21Speaker 3: you hear, it's like, dude, I struggled, dude. I was
- 58:23Speaker 3: a doorman at the comedy store.
- 58:25Speaker 2: The biggest struggle is when they actually have to do comedy. Yeah.
- 58:27Speaker 2: Like the biggest struggle is when they actually have to
- 58:29Speaker 2: do it. It's like the vast majority of it is like,
- 58:32Speaker 2: here's a photo with me kind of doing it. And
- 58:34Speaker 2: then when they actually, when people actually like go, like
- 58:37Speaker 2: do something. That's why a lot of the funny people
- 58:39Speaker 2: out here, whether it's me, Annie, Bill Burr, and I'm
- 58:42Speaker 2: not saying I'm in any of the categories of these.
- 58:45Speaker 2: I'm not putting us in any category. But like Sebastian,
- 58:47Speaker 2: those are East Coast guys. Yeah.
- 58:49Speaker 3: Those are East Coast people. Yeah, all the funny ones
- 58:52Speaker 3: are East Coast guys.
- 58:53Speaker 1: Right?
- 58:53Speaker 2: That are transplants. Yeah.
- 58:55Speaker 3: I mean, nobody's really from L.A. Who the fuck's from L.A.?
- 58:57Speaker 3: I don't know.
- 58:58Speaker 2: Yeah, none of them are. Nobody. Well, there's just D'Elia,
- 59:00Speaker 2: I guess. D'Elia's from L.A. Yeah. And he's funny.
- 59:04Speaker 3: I don't really know his stand-up that well.
- 59:07Speaker 2: I don't either.
- 59:07Speaker 3: I don't think I've ever heard him tell a joke.
- 59:10Speaker 2: He's a funny guy, and he murders. No, no, I
- 59:12Speaker 2: think what he does to women is funny. I'm a fan.
- 59:18Speaker 3: I'm a fan of that.
- 59:28Speaker 2: I said women.
- 59:30Speaker 3: They're all adults. I backed him up on this. These
- 59:34Speaker 3: young women. I feel bad for the guy. It's like
- 59:38Speaker 3: we all got to pretend that 18-year-olds aren't hot.
- 59:39Speaker 2: No, they're hot.
- 59:42Speaker 3: By the way, Tim Dillon, his view from his, I
- 59:45Speaker 3: don't want to give too much information, but it's directly
- 59:48Speaker 3: into Beverly Hills High School.
- 59:49Speaker 2: Absolutely. Into the cafeteria, you look down into it. I
- 59:52Speaker 2: have a sponsorship program. It's psychotic, dude. By the way,
- 59:58Speaker 2: you know what's funny? I'm texting True Geordie. You know him?
- 1:00:02Speaker 2: This massive, busy guy. British guy, yeah. I think, because
- 1:00:05Speaker 2: I have this Irish twink I talk to and hang
- 1:00:08Speaker 2: out with. I'm texting True Geordie. I think it's the
- 1:00:11Speaker 2: Irish twink. Literally, this is the conversation I have with
- 1:00:17Speaker 2: True Geordie. I swear to God, I'm reading the conversation, okay?
- 1:00:26Speaker 2: Listen to this.
- 1:00:26Speaker 1: I'm not even kidding. He goes, this Brandon Chow versus
- 1:00:30Speaker 1: Bobby Leach is wild, bro. It's a car crash. Hope
- 1:00:32Speaker 1: you're in the UK soon. And then I go, I'm
- 1:00:34Speaker 1: going to call you in an hour. I said, call
- 1:00:37Speaker 1: me when you wake up, winky face.
- 1:00:38Speaker 2: We'll plan it. True Geordie. He goes, sweet, thanks. So
- 1:00:44Speaker 2: then he goes, then he texts me. He goes, you awake, bro?
- 1:00:47Speaker 2: Do you know what True Geordie looks like? Get up,
- 1:00:49Speaker 2: True Geordie. I'm mortified. Get up, True Geordie. I swear
- 1:00:53Speaker 2: to God. Look at True Geordie, OK? This guy's a tank.
- 1:00:57Speaker 3: This is what you want. Or no, you want a twink.
- 1:00:59Speaker 3: You don't like a guy this big.
- 1:00:59Speaker 2: No, but this guy's a tank. Listen to this. He
- 1:01:02Speaker 2: texts me. I text him, right? I go, you awake, bro?
- 1:01:07Speaker 2: You awake, bro. Ready? He texts me back. Yeah, just
- 1:01:10Speaker 2: listen to your podcast about Brendan raping you. I'm crying laughing.
- 1:01:14Speaker 2: I text him back. You're allowed to rate me winky face. No,
- 1:01:17Speaker 2: you didn't. Swear to God. You're allowed to rate me
- 1:01:21Speaker 2: winky face. He texts me back. I know because you
- 1:01:23Speaker 2: won't say anything because you want it to be about
- 1:01:25Speaker 2: the work. I respect that. LOL. He goes, do you
- 1:01:28Speaker 2: know when you may be in London? I go, I'm
- 1:01:31Speaker 2: flying you here. Did you forget? He doesn't understand. You're
- 1:01:35Speaker 2: stroking your cock the whole time. I go, I'm flying
- 1:01:40Speaker 2: you here. Did you forget?
- 1:01:42Speaker 3: I know this type of texting. You are masturbating while
- 1:01:46Speaker 3: you're doing this.
- 1:01:47Speaker 2: It was in my hand, maybe. And then I go,
- 1:01:49Speaker 2: I'm flying here. Did you forget? Now I start to worry.
- 1:01:51Speaker 1: I'm like, is this twink? Does he have like a dementia?
- 1:01:53Speaker 1: Which I'm fine with. But he goes, I go, oh,
- 1:01:57Speaker 1: who is this? And he goes, oh, true Geordie Bryant.
- 1:01:59Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my God. How embarrassing. I felt really
- 1:02:05Speaker 1: embarrassed about that.
- 1:02:06Speaker 2: That's hilarious. But, you know, nothing Chris did is proven.
- 1:02:12Speaker 3: No.
- 1:02:13Speaker 2: So the reality is I'm a person where I go, hey. Also,
- 1:02:16Speaker 2: I don't think what he did....
- 1:02:19Speaker 3: It wasn't illegal, and I don't give a shit if
- 1:02:21Speaker 3: you think a guy's creepy.
- 1:02:22Speaker 2: Right, it doesn't matter. I don't fucking care, dude.
- 1:02:25Speaker 3: And there's a lot of fucking, there's a lot of
- 1:02:27Speaker 3: creepy people. In fact, most people are creepy. You just
- 1:02:30Speaker 3: don't know about their fucking creepiness. Louis C.K., it was
- 1:02:32Speaker 3: just being a creep, right?
- 1:02:34Speaker 2: A little creepy. A little creepy, dude. Be a little fucking,
- 1:02:36Speaker 2: it happens, dude. The worst thing D'Elia did was that
- 1:02:39Speaker 2: he produced a school play. It's the worst thing he
- 1:02:42Speaker 2: did was he, I think he funded and produced a
- 1:02:45Speaker 2: school play.
- 1:02:46Speaker 3: I don't, I don't actually know that he did anything.
- 1:02:49Speaker 3: My understanding when it was all happening, it was all
- 1:02:52Speaker 3: like 18 or 19 year old girls.
- 1:02:54Speaker 2: It was like a girl that was like 17.
- 1:02:55Speaker 3: I guess when he found out she was 17, this
- 1:02:58Speaker 3: was the creepiest thing that he did.
- 1:03:00Speaker 2: Right.
- 1:03:00Speaker 3: He found out she was 17. Then like a year later,
- 1:03:03Speaker 3: after she had turned 18, he hit her up again.
- 1:03:06Speaker 3: And that's a little bit, it's a little bit, it's
- 1:03:07Speaker 3: good memory. It's not, but it's not fucking grooming. It's
- 1:03:10Speaker 3: not a teacher. He's not a fucking person in his life. Dude,
- 1:03:13Speaker 3: he likes hot young girls.
- 1:03:14Speaker 1: Right.
- 1:03:15Speaker 3: Most guys like hot young girls. Most guys don't have
- 1:03:17Speaker 3: the opportunity to get hot young girls.
- 1:03:19Speaker 2: That's right.
- 1:03:20Speaker 3: So they deal with their fucking hag wives.
- 1:03:23Speaker 2: You fuck your hag wife. And so nothing was proven.
- 1:03:27Speaker 3: Yeah. And even if whatever was proven, I think everything
- 1:03:31Speaker 3: that he was accused of was just sort of him
- 1:03:32Speaker 3: being a little bit of a douchey. creepy dude, which
- 1:03:36Speaker 3: most guys are. Most guys are way fucking worse than that,
- 1:03:39Speaker 3: to be honest with you. Most guys are fucking pieces
- 1:03:41Speaker 3: of shit. So I don't, I never really, you know,
- 1:03:44Speaker 3: I think it's kind of funny. I think it's all funny. Like,
- 1:03:46Speaker 3: I tease these guys, and I talk about this stuff
- 1:03:48Speaker 3: on my shows, and I think a lot of people
- 1:03:50Speaker 3: in L.A. think that, like, Legion of Skanks and me, like, we, like,
- 1:03:53Speaker 3: are trying to troll them. It's like, no, dude, it's
- 1:03:55Speaker 3: just sort of the elephant in the room. It's a story.
- 1:03:56Speaker 3: When Callum gets fucking canceled for something, it's a big
- 1:03:59Speaker 3: story in comedy, and to not talk about it, and
- 1:04:01Speaker 3: not talk about it in a funny way.
- 1:04:02Speaker 2: And again, that's the story where it's like, 20 years ago. Yeah.
- 1:04:07Speaker 1: It, you know, listen, I don't, whatever everyone's experiences and
- 1:04:10Speaker 1: I've talked about it before where I go, is it
- 1:04:12Speaker 1: possible that he had one idea of the night?
- 1:04:15Speaker 2: She had another idea. Sure. Very possible. Very possible.
- 1:04:17Speaker 1: And this was not what it's being portrayed as. Uh,
- 1:04:22Speaker 1: and that when we look at those dynamics of people
- 1:04:25Speaker 1: that meet up, maybe they're drinking, they hook up and then,
- 1:04:30Speaker 1: You know, 20 years later.
- 1:04:30Speaker 2: They're also soulless actors. They're L.A. soulless actors. I mean, well, I...
- 1:04:36Speaker 2: This is my thing with Meghan Markle. She's like, oh,
- 1:04:38Speaker 2: they're racist. And I'm like, of course they're racist, but
- 1:04:39Speaker 2: you're an actress. Yeah. So I can't believe... I'm going
- 1:04:42Speaker 2: to believe you.
- 1:04:43Speaker 1: I'm choosing between the British reptilian royal family and an L.A.
- 1:04:47Speaker 2: Actress. They're the same person. I'm like, you know?
- 1:04:50Speaker 3: Yeah, it's... Yeah, you know, a lot of... It's just
- 1:04:54Speaker 3: a silly.
- 1:04:56Speaker 3: They got so, it's almost like, I know Pete Davidson
- 1:04:59Speaker 3: pretty well, right?
- 1:05:00Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 1:05:00Speaker 3: And sometimes I'll talk about him on my show. And
- 1:05:03Speaker 3: I feel bad sometimes because I'm like, I really like,
- 1:05:05Speaker 3: I've always really liked Pete. Always been a really sweetheart
- 1:05:08Speaker 3: of a guy, right? But he's so famous that it's,
- 1:05:12Speaker 3: I'm not talking about the Pete Davidson that I knew
- 1:05:13Speaker 3: from the comedy scene. I'm talking about this celebrity thing
- 1:05:17Speaker 3: that's fucking Kim Kardashian and roasting Kanye. It's like, it's
- 1:05:20Speaker 3: so much bigger than, and I would feel bad if
- 1:05:23Speaker 3: Pete Davidson ever heard us like talking shit. It's not
- 1:05:25Speaker 3: even really talking shit. It's just sort of poking fun
- 1:05:27Speaker 3: and making fun of the whole situation. He might come
- 1:05:30Speaker 3: to me one day and be like, hey dude, why
- 1:05:31Speaker 3: would you say that? That like hurt my feelings. And
- 1:05:33Speaker 3: I was like, dude, you don't have feelings anymore. You're famous.
- 1:05:38Speaker 3: You're a billionaire.
- 1:05:40Speaker 2: You just got to release yourself.
- 1:05:42Speaker 3: And also, I don't really feel bad for people that
- 1:05:44Speaker 3: are fucking millionaires that get made fun of online. I
- 1:05:48Speaker 3: don't feel bad for you.
- 1:05:50Speaker 2: That's right.
- 1:05:51Speaker 3: That's your fucking biggest problem? I feel bad for people
- 1:05:53Speaker 3: that don't have- Is that people on Reddit are saying
- 1:05:54Speaker 3: mean words? Are you out of your fucking mind?
- 1:05:57Speaker 2: You're a millionaire. Right.
- 1:05:58Speaker 3: And you care about what somebody on Reddit says.
- 1:06:00Speaker 1: There are people that cannot eat. There are people that
- 1:06:03Speaker 1: don't have the money to pay their rent, that cannot
- 1:06:05Speaker 1: get their kids insulin.
- 1:06:05Speaker 2: Mike Feeney. Right. Now, so those people, my audience. Jeremiah Watkins.
- 1:06:13Speaker 2: We know them. Jeremiah Watkins is doing the star maps
- 1:06:19Speaker 2: in L.A. Trying to show people houses. He's flipping signs.
- 1:06:24Speaker 1: He's flipping signs. He's just trying to show people houses.
- 1:06:27Speaker 1: He's selling fruit with Mexicans right now on the freeway.
- 1:06:31Speaker 1: Jeremiah Watkins is trying to sell bottles of water on
- 1:06:34Speaker 1: the 405.
- 1:06:35Speaker 2: So the reality is it's, you know, those are the
- 1:06:39Speaker 2: people you go. It's, you know, people can say whatever
- 1:06:43Speaker 2: they want. It's just kind of like I learned a
- 1:06:45Speaker 2: long time ago. I have a very thick skin.
- 1:06:47Speaker 3: I get trolled. I got trolled by the Opie and
- 1:06:49Speaker 3: Anthony subreddit years ago. to the point where I was posting,
- 1:06:53Speaker 3: I was going back at them, and it was like,
- 1:06:54Speaker 3: they went, I mean, it was like they made their
- 1:06:56Speaker 3: own subreddits that were dedicated to me. And it just
- 1:06:59Speaker 3: literally gave me a thick skin to it. If there's
- 1:07:02Speaker 3: nothing that anybody could say, there's no, here's what's happening.
- 1:07:05Speaker 3: This is the physical action. A stranger somewhere in the
- 1:07:08Speaker 3: world is going like this. Whether they're good words or
- 1:07:11Speaker 3: bad words, the physical action, actually what it is.
- 1:07:13Speaker 1: My name, Tim Dillon, is the same name as a
- 1:07:15Speaker 1: guy who works at Marvel. And literally in his Twitter handle,
- 1:07:19Speaker 1: he says, not the comedian.
- 1:07:20Speaker 2: Because all day, every day, people just tweet at this
- 1:07:24Speaker 2: guy and go, you're fat, you're gay. I hope you
- 1:07:27Speaker 2: get AIDS. I hope you get AIDS and die. You're
- 1:07:30Speaker 2: a fascist. You're a piece of shit. You sat next
- 1:07:33Speaker 2: to Alex Jones. You did a podcast with Alex Jones.
- 1:07:36Speaker 2: And this guy's like, I don't know what's happening. Yeah, dude,
- 1:07:39Speaker 2: I'm an artist.
- 1:07:40Speaker 3: The same thing, there's a guy named John Jones who's
- 1:07:43Speaker 3: not John Jones the fighter, but every time John Jones
- 1:07:46Speaker 3: gets into some more trouble, he gets like 100 messages.
- 1:07:50Speaker 3: Same thing, not John Jones the fighter. It's like.
- 1:07:52Speaker 2: Yeah. It's fucking... It's difficult. It's very difficult.
- 1:07:55Speaker 3: You gotta develop a thick skin. You lean into it.
- 1:07:58Speaker 3: And objectively speaking.
- 1:08:01Speaker 3: Trolling is funny it's really funny there's a great moment
- 1:08:04Speaker 3: in south park do you remember i don't know how
- 1:08:05Speaker 3: much you watch south park.
- 1:08:06Speaker 2: Not a ton but i know it's brilliant and i've
- 1:08:08Speaker 2: watched a bunch.
- 1:08:08Speaker 3: Of it there was a series they did it was
- 1:08:11Speaker 3: a few episodes in a row where they were where
- 1:08:12Speaker 3: the dad became an internet troll yeah it was fucking
- 1:08:15Speaker 3: hilarious dude it's so funny when and he's and he's
- 1:08:18Speaker 3: trying to get somebody to understand it whoever it is
- 1:08:20Speaker 3: they ask him they're like why are you doing this
- 1:08:22Speaker 3: this is this is so dumb what are you doing
- 1:08:24Speaker 3: why would you do.
- 1:08:24Speaker 2: This and he just he he almost loses control he's
- 1:08:28Speaker 2: like because it's funny. Yeah.
- 1:08:30Speaker 3: And he just can't like he it's right. People that
- 1:08:33Speaker 3: don't get that. It's like frustrating.
- 1:08:35Speaker 2: It's frustrating. There's a lot of people out there. You
- 1:08:36Speaker 2: got free time. Yeah. You're bored. It's it's a fun
- 1:08:40Speaker 2: way to fuck with people. Right.
- 1:08:42Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 1:08:43Speaker 1: And you are many of those people maybe are not
- 1:08:47Speaker 1: doing what they want per se. Maybe they're like working
- 1:08:51Speaker 1: at a job that's kind of boring and it's not
- 1:08:53Speaker 1: that fulfilling and they go online and they fuck.
- 1:08:55Speaker 3: With entertaining as fuck entertaining it's i do it every
- 1:08:57Speaker 3: time when i'm on a flight every time i'm on
- 1:08:59Speaker 3: a flight i'm bored for five hours i just sit
- 1:09:01Speaker 3: there and i start just trolling and arguing back and
- 1:09:03Speaker 3: forth with people it's so fun and so silly so
- 1:09:06Speaker 3: if you separate yourself from it and realize that it's
- 1:09:07Speaker 3: just a stranger saying something that's probably not valid then
- 1:09:11Speaker 3: fucking the problem is when it's valid i think it
- 1:09:13Speaker 3: starts to affect you And that'll happen sometimes. People will
- 1:09:16Speaker 3: pull on a thread and they get something. You go, oh,
- 1:09:18Speaker 3: that one actually hurt a little bit.
- 1:09:20Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, well, I think that's part of it. And
- 1:09:23Speaker 2: I also think part of the problem is there isn't
- 1:09:26Speaker 2: an element of people going, here's your house. You know
- 1:09:29Speaker 2: what I mean? Here's your address. Here's where you live.
- 1:09:32Speaker 2: I've had that.
- 1:09:33Speaker 1: Yeah, but listen, if you have a family, that's a concern.
- 1:09:39Speaker 3: There was an article that came out that said I
- 1:09:41Speaker 3: was a Proud Boy.
- 1:09:41Speaker 2: Right.
- 1:09:42Speaker 3: This completely fabricated article.
- 1:09:44Speaker 2: Right. Actually, it wasn't fabricated. Yeah. I am a Proud Boy.
- 1:09:50Speaker 2: I'm the leader of the New Jersey chapter. Of the
- 1:09:52Speaker 2: Proud Boys, yeah.
- 1:09:53Speaker 3: No, what happened was there was a bunch of Proud
- 1:09:55Speaker 3: Boys that were fans of Legion of Skan.
- 1:09:57Speaker 2: Yeah, of course.
- 1:09:58Speaker 3: If people don't know the... Gavin McGinnis started Proud Boys
- 1:10:02Speaker 3: while he was on Anthony Cumia's network. Now my podcast
- 1:10:05Speaker 3: was also on Anthony Cumia's network at the same time.
- 1:10:07Speaker 3: So it was just a ton of crossover. And they
- 1:10:09Speaker 3: started this group as like a fucking gag. At first
- 1:10:11Speaker 3: it was just like they were just trying to be,
- 1:10:13Speaker 3: and then it turned into something super politicized and super,
- 1:10:15Speaker 3: like they were going out to be counter pro. If
- 1:10:18Speaker 3: you're a fucking funny group but you're counter protesting, you
- 1:10:21Speaker 3: gotta look in the mirror.
- 1:10:22Speaker 2: You're not a funny group, dude.
- 1:10:23Speaker 3: It's not about serial, it's not about punching each other
- 1:10:26Speaker 3: in the arm. If you're counter protesting in fucking riot gear,
- 1:10:29Speaker 3: then it's something different than that. I'm not even necessarily
- 1:10:31Speaker 3: demonizing that.
- 1:10:32Speaker 2: No. Go fucking. You want to go fight in a
- 1:10:35Speaker 2: Portland park? Have fun. Have at it, idiots. Have a
- 1:10:38Speaker 2: fun Sunday.
- 1:10:38Speaker 3: You guys can beat the shit out of each other
- 1:10:40Speaker 3: with bike locks.
- 1:10:40Speaker 2: For all I give a shit about. It's a fun,
- 1:10:41Speaker 2: nice weekend.
- 1:10:42Speaker 3: I enjoy watching it online, right? So there was a
- 1:10:44Speaker 3: bunch of Proud Boys, though, that were fans of Legion
- 1:10:46Speaker 3: of Skanks, and they were fans of us, and they
- 1:10:49Speaker 3: had a blog, like some Proud Boy newsletter, right? And
- 1:10:53Speaker 3: after I fought at Ellis Mania, they named me proud
- 1:10:57Speaker 3: boy of the month, right? So they go proud boy
- 1:10:59Speaker 3: of the month. The context is they were just naming,
- 1:11:02Speaker 3: they were, you know.
- 1:11:03Speaker 2: Naming whoever.
- 1:11:04Speaker 3: Whoever, right? They would have said it was The Rock.
- 1:11:06Speaker 3: Had The Rock, you know, done something that, you know,
- 1:11:08Speaker 3: they were a fan of his. So that came out
- 1:11:11Speaker 3: and I hit them up. I was like, dude, what
- 1:11:13Speaker 3: the fuck are you doing? I was like, if you're
- 1:11:14Speaker 3: a fan of mine, you would understand why this would be.
- 1:11:17Speaker 3: And I've never, I'm not shitting on the proud boys.
- 1:11:19Speaker 3: I'm not shitting on what they do. But let's get real, dude.
- 1:11:22Speaker 3: It's a fucking scarlet letter.
- 1:11:23Speaker 2: You're involving you, and you have nothing to do with it.
- 1:11:26Speaker 3: You want to wear that scarlet letter, wear that scarlet
- 1:11:27Speaker 3: letter all fucking day long, dude. And I'm not going
- 1:11:29Speaker 3: to kick you out of my show for wearing a
- 1:11:30Speaker 3: Proud Boys hat.
- 1:11:31Speaker 2: I don't give a shit, dude. I don't even know
- 1:11:32Speaker 2: what that even is. The same way I.
- 1:11:34Speaker 3: Wouldn't kick somebody out for wearing a fucking Antifa fucking helmet.
- 1:11:37Speaker 2: If you pay the money, I don't kick anyone out.
- 1:11:39Speaker 2: I don't give a shit, dude. Unless you start yelling.
- 1:11:40Speaker 2: If you start yelling shit, then it's over, right? Yeah.
- 1:11:42Speaker 2: So I hit the guy up. I was like, dude,
- 1:11:44Speaker 2: you got to take that down. That's crazy.
- 1:11:45Speaker 3: But the internet is forever, and that's... you know, people,
- 1:11:48Speaker 3: you know, they use, I guess some sort of like
- 1:11:50Speaker 3: way back machine or whatever. And they found this article specifically.
- 1:11:53Speaker 3: And then they, you know, they wrote a whole thing
- 1:11:55Speaker 3: about how I'm a proud boy. They said this tattoo
- 1:11:57Speaker 3: on my arm was, uh, because I'm a fourth degree
- 1:11:59Speaker 3: proud boy.
- 1:12:00Speaker 2: Yeah. It's just bad.
- 1:12:01Speaker 3: It's number four. It's just a shitty tattoo. No, it's
- 1:12:04Speaker 3: a good tattoo. It's actually, it represents chaos theory. It's
- 1:12:06Speaker 3: a double pendulum. It's not even a number four. It's
- 1:12:08Speaker 3: a double pendulum, which makes this design, which represents chaos theory.
- 1:12:11Speaker 2: Did your mom get that for you?
- 1:12:13Speaker 3: No, it's, uh, No, I got, I mean, you know, no,
- 1:12:18Speaker 3: I got this for my son. I got this for
- 1:12:20Speaker 3: my career. I got it for everything. We could be
- 1:12:22Speaker 3: anywhere right now, Tim. The infinite amount of decisions that
- 1:12:26Speaker 3: we could have made in our lives.
- 1:12:27Speaker 2: Yeah. Literally, dude. It's crazy.
- 1:12:29Speaker 3: The fact that me and you are sitting here across
- 1:12:30Speaker 3: from each other is an actual, it's so unlikely, the
- 1:12:34Speaker 3: fact that Ben's here, the fact that these lights are here,
- 1:12:36Speaker 3: it's so unlikely that it's a small fucking miracle, right?
- 1:12:38Speaker 3: And that's what this tattoo represents. Yeah.
- 1:12:40Speaker 2: Not fucking... A fourth degree Proud Boy, which is, you know, dumb.
- 1:12:44Speaker 2: And so, and people just started, uh, people, some guy
- 1:12:48Speaker 2: wrote an article. Yeah.
- 1:12:49Speaker 3: They share it. And then they were like, you know,
- 1:12:51Speaker 3: Proud Boy lives in this town in New Jersey. Um,
- 1:12:53Speaker 3: actually had the town wrong, which is funny. Cause I
- 1:12:55Speaker 3: have a generic name. I think they found a different
- 1:12:57Speaker 3: Louis Gomez.
- 1:12:57Speaker 2: Right.
- 1:12:58Speaker 3: Um, but it was still like, I was like, and then, uh,
- 1:13:01Speaker 3: you know, I won't even say his name, but one
- 1:13:02Speaker 3: of the, you know, one of the comics that sort
- 1:13:04Speaker 3: of trolls me online back in New York.
- 1:13:06Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 1:13:07Speaker 3: Um, He started posting about it. And he started retweeting
- 1:13:11Speaker 3: the article. And that's why I really started having a
- 1:13:13Speaker 3: fucking big problem with this kid. Because, like, no, I
- 1:13:15Speaker 3: do have a family. I do have a house. Your intent.
- 1:13:18Speaker 2: That's when it goes too far.
- 1:13:19Speaker 3: Your fucking intent is to put my address out there. Yes.
- 1:13:22Speaker 3: So maybe somebody will see me and come up to
- 1:13:24Speaker 3: me and my family. What do you think is going
- 1:13:27Speaker 3: to fucking happen there?
- 1:13:27Speaker 2: Right.
- 1:13:28Speaker 3: What the fuck do you think is going to happen
- 1:13:29Speaker 3: if somebody comes up to me and my fucking family?
- 1:13:31Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 1:13:31Speaker 3: That's a crazy thing to do. Especially, and this is
- 1:13:34Speaker 3: my problem with that kid specifically, he knew I wasn't
- 1:13:36Speaker 3: a problem. He knew what was going on. Like, he
- 1:13:39Speaker 3: was completely aware. And that's where I go, that's a
- 1:13:41Speaker 3: fucking irresponsibility.
- 1:13:42Speaker 2: Just be real. That's when it goes too far. Yeah.
- 1:13:44Speaker 2: That's when it's too far. Yeah.
- 1:13:45Speaker 3: And I'm not fucking, I would never give out somebody's address.
- 1:13:48Speaker 3: I would never, I know we make jokes about doxing people. No,
- 1:13:50Speaker 3: I don't really want people to do that shit. But
- 1:13:53Speaker 3: it's fucking hot in the kitchen, dude.
- 1:13:56Speaker 2: It really is.
- 1:13:56Speaker 3: And in a weird way, after Trump left, now it's
- 1:14:00Speaker 3: cooled down a little bit because I feel like the
- 1:14:02Speaker 3: people on the left, they don't feel like they have
- 1:14:04Speaker 3: to fight so hard.
- 1:14:05Speaker 2: They got a little bit of a W.
- 1:14:06Speaker 3: Comedy is sort of lower on the rung of priorities.
- 1:14:09Speaker 2: Yeah, as it should be. As it should be. Yeah.
- 1:14:11Speaker 3: But if Trump runs again, it's going to get hot
- 1:14:13Speaker 3: in the kitchen again.
- 1:14:14Speaker 2: It's going to get hot in the kitchen. It may
- 1:14:15Speaker 2: get so hot where it's like it's– it's scalding.
- 1:14:20Speaker 3: And I don't give a fuck about politics.
- 1:14:24Speaker 2: None of us do. We all have ideas and values
- 1:14:26Speaker 2: and things, but then we also realize our job, and
- 1:14:29Speaker 2: this is the problem, is you can have fans that
- 1:14:33Speaker 2: believe everything.
- 1:14:35Speaker 1: I have fans that believe Trump's Hitler. I have fans
- 1:14:38Speaker 1: that believe Trump's the greatest president that's ever lived. It's
- 1:14:40Speaker 1: not my business. I don't really care what my fans believe.
- 1:14:43Speaker 1: I care that I'm doing my job. I care what
- 1:14:46Speaker 1: I believe. I don't give a shit what the people
- 1:14:48Speaker 1: in the audience believe. How would I even know?
- 1:14:51Speaker 3: It's inconsequential for me and my game that I'm playing,
- 1:14:55Speaker 3: who the president is. Whoever the president is, and this
- 1:14:59Speaker 3: is what we said before about gas prices, it's inconsequential.
- 1:15:02Speaker 3: I'm focused on those things. Everything from gas prices to
- 1:15:07Speaker 3: who the president is to all this shit that I truly,
- 1:15:09Speaker 3: really can't control. I know that you can.
- 1:15:12Speaker 2: You can't.
- 1:15:13Speaker 3: I'm hyper-focused on playing my game and sort of moving
- 1:15:16Speaker 3: forward And those are variables that have very little effect
- 1:15:19Speaker 3: on whether or not I'm moving forward.
- 1:15:21Speaker 2: That's right. Yeah. Luis Gomez, where can the people find you?
- 1:15:27Speaker 2: Where can they, where can the people support what you're doing?
- 1:15:31Speaker 2: Is Skank Fest completely sold out?
- 1:15:33Speaker 3: Skank Fest is completely sold out.
- 1:15:35Speaker 2: How many tickets do you sell?
- 1:15:36Speaker 3: We do 2,500 people per day.
- 1:15:38Speaker 2: Okay.
- 1:15:38Speaker 3: So very exclusive. Very exclusive. It's not, it feels like
- 1:15:42Speaker 3: a big party. It's one venue, four rooms going on
- 1:15:45Speaker 3: at the same time.
- 1:15:46Speaker 2: Your special? Yeah, my special's up. My old one's up
- 1:15:49Speaker 2: on YouTube.
- 1:15:50Speaker 3: I'm doing, I think we're doing, Gas Digital's going to
- 1:15:52Speaker 3: produce six half-hour specials this summer, and I'm going to
- 1:15:55Speaker 3: do another half-hour for Gas Digital, the Gringo Poppy way.
- 1:15:59Speaker 2: Buy my special. We'll put it on Gas Digital. You
- 1:16:01Speaker 2: should just buy it. I'll just buy it flat out.
- 1:16:03Speaker 2: You should just buy it flat out. I'll sell it
- 1:16:05Speaker 2: to you.
- 1:16:05Speaker 4: $ 500.
- 1:16:05Speaker 2: Put it on Gas Digital. Let's go. I was thinking
- 1:16:08Speaker 2: slightly more.
- 1:16:08Speaker 3: No, we're going to put it out on YouTube. We're
- 1:16:09Speaker 3: going to put it out on YouTube. There'll be an
- 1:16:11Speaker 3: extended cut on Gas Digital, uncensored extended, a.
- 1:16:13Speaker 2: Few more jokes. How are you going to choose the comics?
- 1:16:16Speaker 3: We have Rebecca Trent and Christine Evans are executive producing. And,
- 1:16:22Speaker 3: you know, yeah, they produce Skank Fests with me. So
- 1:16:25Speaker 3: I think we're going to do one with me, Dave.
- 1:16:27Speaker 3: Looks like maybe Mike Racine, Aaron Berg. A few killers. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- 1:16:31Speaker 3: Probably six or seven of them. So look out for that. Also,
- 1:16:35Speaker 3: I'm on the road a ton right now. Go to lewisofskanks.com.
- 1:16:38Speaker 3: I'm going all over California. I'm going to San Diego.
- 1:16:40Speaker 3: I'm going to Ontario. I'm going all over Texas. I'll
- 1:16:42Speaker 3: be in Dallas. I'll be in Fort Worth. I'll be
- 1:16:45Speaker 3: in Austin. Fucking EMS Pennsylvania is coming up. Albany is
- 1:16:50Speaker 3: coming up. A lot of stuff coming up. lewisofskanks.com. Me
- 1:16:53Speaker 3: and Aaron Berger are going on tour all over the
- 1:16:54Speaker 3: place all this fall.
- 1:16:55Speaker 2: Aaron Berger is hilarious. Fucking killer.
- 1:16:57Speaker 3: One of the dirtiest comics.
- 1:16:58Speaker 2: Great show.
- 1:16:59Speaker 3: And yeah, check out my podcast. I do three podcasts,
- 1:17:02Speaker 3: Legion of Skanks, Real Ass Podcast, and Yo!
- 1:17:04Speaker 2: MMA Rap.
- 1:17:05Speaker 3: They're all on my network, which is gasdigitalnetwork.com. You don't
- 1:17:07Speaker 3: have to subscribe. You can just go and listen to
- 1:17:09Speaker 3: the latest episodes and watch the latest episodes for free
- 1:17:11Speaker 3: right on the website. Or you can subscribe on iTunes,
- 1:17:13Speaker 3: everywhere else. And there's a premium side as well if
- 1:17:15Speaker 3: you guys really like it and you guys want to
- 1:17:17Speaker 3: get the archives and all that.
- 1:17:18Speaker 1: Luis Gomez, thank you for coming out, representing New York
- 1:17:22Speaker 1: comics podcasters, chopping it up here with us out in L.A.
- 1:17:28Speaker 2: And, you know, we love you guys in New York
- 1:17:31Speaker 2: and we miss you. It's good to see you. I
- 1:17:34Speaker 2: love you, Timmy.
- 1:17:34Speaker 3: I love you guys. You know I have a ton
- 1:17:36Speaker 3: of respect for what you do. I look up to you.
- 1:17:38Speaker 3: I look at what you guys are doing. I take
- 1:17:39Speaker 3: influence from it in very many ways. And yeah, dude,
- 1:17:43Speaker 3: it's fucking, it's really nice.
- 1:17:44Speaker 2: Well, we also look in the same way we look
- 1:17:46Speaker 2: down on you guys. You know, we absolutely, we look
- 1:17:50Speaker 2: down on you and we appreciate what you're doing at
- 1:17:52Speaker 2: that level. And we appreciate that. Lewis, thank you.