Latest / Jersey Arts Podcast / Grab Your Crowns and Ring in St. Paddy's with Pinky Patel at NJPAC

Transcript

Grab Your Crowns and Ring in St. Paddy's with Pinky Patel at NJPAC · Jersey Arts Podcast

• 0:04
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: This is Gina Marie Rodriguez and you're listening to the Jersey Arts Podcast.
• 0:08
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Pinky Patel is the crown-adorned TikTok comedian.
• 0:12
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: You've come to know and love for her no-holds-barred, quick and quippy style.
• 0:16
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: She speaks directly to audiences from her glam cave, though sometimes she calls it… something else.
• 0:23
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: She claimed TikTok stardom while still working her corporate 9-to-5 job and playing PTA mom on the daily.
• 0:29
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: It was the COVID pandemic and a close friend who gave her the push she needed to change her life, and now she's telling it like it is, making folks laugh and living life on her terms.
• 0:39
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Her I Said what I Said tour visits Newark just in time for Women's History Month.
• 0:44
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Check out today's episode where Pinky and I chat feminist comedy, lifestyle tips and women empowerment.
• 0:50
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I wore my crown just for you.
• 0:53
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Yay, I love it.
• 0:54
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I love it.
• 0:55
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: We're matching sort of.
• 0:57
  Pinky Patel: Sort of We'll get you there, don't worry, you'll be wearing it all the time.
• 1:02
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I just need to like get the streaks in my hair too, and then we'll be on a good path.
• 1:07
  Pinky Patel: Yeah, whatever color you want, it doesn't have to be magenta.
• 1:09
  Pinky Patel: You know, whatever color speaks to you.
• 1:11
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Yeah, you know, I've always wanted to go blue.
• 1:15
  Pinky Patel: That would be spectacular.
• 1:16
  Pinky Patel: I think you should.
• 1:17
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Right, all right, well, now I have your approval.
• 1:20
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Not that you needed my approval, but yeah, I didn't, I didn't.
• 1:30
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: But how's your day going?
• 1:31
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Spectacular.
• 1:33
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: How are you, gina?
• 1:33
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I am very well.
• 1:34
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I'm glad that you're here with me.
• 1:34
  Pinky Patel: Thank you for taking the time.
• 1:35
  Pinky Patel: Thank you for reaching out.
• 1:36
  Pinky Patel: I love doing podcasts.
• 1:37
  Pinky Patel: It's so much fun.
• 1:39
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Awesome.
• 1:39
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Well, I'm glad it's not a chore then I hate when it feels like a chore.
• 1:43
  Pinky Patel: I know we just need a lot of coffee cups and then we can, you know, do a little cozy time.
• 1:48
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I should have brought the coffee.
• 1:49
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I'm a terrible hostess.
• 1:51
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Next time I'll bring coffee.
• 1:52
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Do you mind if I tell you a stupid story?
• 1:56
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Though first no?
• 1:58
  Pinky Patel: no, tell me however many stupid stories you want to, I will.
• 2:01
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I won't say it's so much a story as a factoid.
• 2:05
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: So your videos, you know you tend to sign off not all the time, but you sign off with okay bye, like a really clipped thing, and somehow that has entered my subconscious, subconscious, subconscious.
• 2:19
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Yeah, I forgot how to speak english, so that's fun.
• 2:21
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Um, but I'm not a mom, but I have two dogs and, for whatever reason, I now tell them okay bye whenever they're misbehaving and I want them to listen to me, so I'll say okay bye and then I walk away and then they follow me and realize that they need to do what I'm, what I'm saying.
• 2:41
  Pinky Patel: That's spectacular.
• 2:42
  Pinky Patel: I mean, that's how we say, that's how we.
• 2:44
  Pinky Patel: And phone calls they're so awkward, they're so like.
• 2:47
  Pinky Patel: I realized that I, we all say that like right, when we're trying to hang up the phone.
• 2:52
  Pinky Patel: And I know, you know, we're talking less and less on the phone as years have progressed, which makes it even more awkward.
• 2:59
  Pinky Patel: At the end Now we're just like okay, how do we abruptly end this conversation, like if you were in front of me and I was done conversing with you.
• 3:06
  Pinky Patel: I can't just look at you, gina, and be like okay, I'm done, I'm leaving, bye.
• 3:09
  Pinky Patel: Like I have to wait.
• 3:11
  Pinky Patel: Polite society says you have to wait until there's a lull in the conversation, like there's so many rules you know.
• 3:17
  Pinky Patel: And so I'm like no, let's all just be awkward and embrace our awkwardness.
• 3:20
  Pinky Patel: Let's just do it and then nobody.
• 3:22
  Pinky Patel: Then that's going to be the new norm right, yeah.
• 3:25
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Yeah, I'm on board with that.
• 3:26
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: When I was younger, I used to be hey, thanks bye.
• 3:30
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: It was a very quick hey, thanks bye, and I would only do that, you know, in text, like I wouldn't dare to say that to someone in person, I guess.
• 3:41
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: But I think that we should all just adopt it because that's, this is the new age, right, yeah, and just be like okay, bye, and then hang up, exactly All right.
• 3:50
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Well, thank you for letting me share my, my little factoid of how I mother my dogs.
• 3:55
  Pinky Patel: Hey man, they're your fur babies.
• 3:56
  Pinky Patel: They might not be skin babies, but they're your fur babies.
• 3:59
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: They are, and I love that you have made that distinction between a fur baby and a skin baby.
• 4:04
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: You're one of the people who approves of skin babies.
• 4:07
  Pinky Patel: So you know what, as long as, as long as we're not comparing and contrasting, I don't care what you do with your life.
• 4:12
  Pinky Patel: Like is your life, is your money, as long as you're not hurting yourself and other people.
• 4:17
  Pinky Patel: Have at it, girl, do whatever the F you want you know.
• 4:20
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Thank you, I love that, and it's also very feminist of you to say that.
• 4:23
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I think that you know we're entering March and that's Women's History Month, so that's a great segue right into my first question Spectacular.
• 4:34
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I set it up just like that, but I wanted to talk about I guess I'll call it your journey into comedy, because you didn't start really posting until the pandemic hit, and this was pandemic posting on TikTok, I mean really during a time that I think most of the country, or well, most of the planet, just needed something to laugh at or laugh about.
• 5:00
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: But I heard that you really started doing it for an audience of one and because I think female friendships are so important, I'd really love to hear about that one person who helped you I mean basically helped pushed you into stardom.
• 5:11
  Pinky Patel: She's regretting her life decisions right now.
• 5:13
  Pinky Patel: It is.
• 5:15
  Pinky Patel: It all started because of, you know, and this was it was.
• 5:20
  Pinky Patel: It was really funny because I always had a Facebook page.
• 5:23
  Pinky Patel: Because as soon as I got married and I moved from Connecticut to Illinois, I was like, well, you know, being brown, you're brown, I'm brown.
• 5:31
  Pinky Patel: We know what the expectancy of women is who are married, right.
• 5:34
  Pinky Patel: And so I was like, well, my mom is in Connecticut, I don't want to snail mail pictures of her grandbabies, right, babies, right.
• 5:46
  Pinky Patel: So I was like, she can ask my brother to go online on the Facebook.
• 5:47
  Pinky Patel: So it started off as that and I was the mom behind the camera because, you know, pregnancy, depression, everything just compounded.
• 5:53
  Pinky Patel: You could tell on my body, you could tell on my face.
• 5:56
  Pinky Patel: I hated being in front of the camera.
• 5:58
  Pinky Patel: And then, december of 2019, I was talking to my work wife and you know, I was just like how funny would it be if I like started posting these random thoughts of the day that I just come to your off your cubicle and I just shout these things, or I'll like message her on Teams my random thought over the day, and it always made her giggle.
• 6:17
  Pinky Patel: I can hear her chuckling over the wall, all of that, right.
• 6:20
  Pinky Patel: And so then she was like, oh my God, that that would be hilarious.
• 6:23
  Pinky Patel: So I started posting on Facebook a random thought of the day and then that turned into along that timeline of December of 2019.
• 6:32
  Pinky Patel: You know, we work was difficult.
• 6:35
  Pinky Patel: I was looking for a different job because the company like they weren't you know, they weren't respecting me and all that stuff.
• 6:41
  Pinky Patel: You know corporate life, you know what I'm talking about.
• 6:44
  Pinky Patel: And so then I go to my work wife.
• 6:47
  Pinky Patel: Now we're told to stay at home.
• 6:48
  Pinky Patel: Right now it's January, february of 2020, march is coming up.
• 6:53
  Pinky Patel: When they put us on lockdown, friday the 11th, right, it was just like the big, ominous date that they told us we had to stay at home.
• 7:01
  Pinky Patel: So then we stayed at home and then I'm messaging her on Teams.
• 7:04
  Pinky Patel: I was like how funny would it be if I took these random thoughts of the day, which were just text, and I said them and I recorded it and I put it on YouTube.
• 7:13
  Pinky Patel: She's like, hey, girl, hey, go ahead, I'll follow you there.
• 7:17
  Pinky Patel: So every time I decided like every time I had this brilliant idea, my work wife was like, oh my god, yeah, I'll follow you there.
• 7:24
  Pinky Patel: And I was like done, yeah, it was all for my work wife.
• 7:27
  Pinky Patel: I call her my gothic queen, um, and she's very goth.
• 7:31
  Pinky Patel: She's very like, heavily tattooed, very like if I know exactly what high school group she would have been in in her high school years.
• 7:39
  Pinky Patel: You know, and I love that.
• 7:40
  Pinky Patel: I like I'm the type of person where I will take the stereotypes that you have thrust upon me and my girlfriends and my people that are in my tribe and I will embrace those, those, those things, and I will make you regret the fact that you tried to make fun of me for it Like remember back in the day when you were labeled a goth, it was like so bad.
• 8:00
  Pinky Patel: Now everything's going on.
• 8:00
  Pinky Patel: I love the dark aesthetic.
• 8:02
  Pinky Patel: I'm like you didn't like this back in the 90s.
• 8:04
  Pinky Patel: Okay, like you don't get to talk now.
• 8:07
  Pinky Patel: So I embrace these, these stereotypes, and I just I say you know what?
• 8:11
  Pinky Patel: I just flick them off because I'm like you're gonna, and you know again, being a woman of color, we have a lot of stereotypes thrust on us.
• 8:19
  Pinky Patel: So when I go on stage, I call out all of those stereotypes and I embrace it and I'm just like no, no, no, no, no, no.
• 8:25
  Pinky Patel: You're going to say the Indian people are doctors.
• 8:27
  Pinky Patel: Well, guess what I'm going to be like?
• 8:29
  Pinky Patel: I'm not the doctor Indian, I'm the IT Indian.
• 8:31
  Pinky Patel: Respect me, witch, you know what I'm saying?
• 8:34
  Pinky Patel: Like let's take these things that people have put negative connotation on, negative like behind these stereotypes, and let's make it something positive, right, yeah?
• 8:50
  Pinky Patel: And I'm like no, we need to embrace these for whatever community, either the Latina community, the South Asian community, let's embrace them and just blow these negative people out of the water yeah, I mean, I love that.
• 8:55
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: And long-lived minorities, right, who are?
• 8:57
  Pinky Patel: like we don't have minorities, we don't have this country, so exactly as we're talking about these different minority groups.
• 9:06
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I guess I'm wondering if there comes a responsibility that you feel because you, you take on this role of representation.
• 9:14
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Right, While we've we've grown in terms of diversity, it's still very limited when it comes to our media.
• 9:21
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: So is there a sense of heaviness or what's that?
• 9:26
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Uncle Ben quote with great, with great power, comes great responsibility.
• 9:30
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: It does that affect you at all?
• 9:33
  Pinky Patel: Um, no, because.
• 9:35
  Pinky Patel: So what I'm doing is I am finding all of the women that match my vibe so that I can put them in my tribe, and so to me, it doesn't matter if what your skin.
• 9:47
  Pinky Patel: It literally doesn't matter what your skin color is.
• 9:49
  Pinky Patel: To me, it doesn't matter what your background is.
• 9:51
  Pinky Patel: To me, what matters is does the content that I put out and then, as a result, the standup comedy show that I do, if that resonates with you and if that's how you feel about yourself, your future you're like you know I want.
• 10:07
  Pinky Patel: I want to break whatever trauma that I grew up with, like I want to.
• 10:11
  Pinky Patel: The goal in life is always to be a better person.
• 10:14
  Pinky Patel: That's like the older you get, your goal should be how can I be a better version of myself, whether that is mentally, physically, whatever, right, like that's why a lot of women, when they get older, they get into physical fitness because they have the time right.
• 10:28
  Pinky Patel: Their babies are out of the house.
• 10:30
  Pinky Patel: They'd have.
• 10:31
  Pinky Patel: You know they have the time and maybe that's when we are supposed to.
• 10:34
  Pinky Patel: You know, that's when we get our second wind is when we get into the older stages of our life.
• 10:40
  Pinky Patel: Like I'm 44 years old.
• 10:41
  Pinky Patel: Okay, I know a lot of people don't know that because I don't put it out there, but I'm like my age should not matter to you.
• 10:47
  Pinky Patel: It should matter what's coming out of this mouth.
• 10:50
  Pinky Patel: It should matter what I'm doing.
• 10:51
  Pinky Patel: It should matter how, like how I'm crossing that finish line, like, am I bringing women with me or am I knocking other women down in order to cross that finish line, Right.
• 11:01
  Pinky Patel: So I love that quote with great power, responsibility, all that stuff.
• 11:07
  Pinky Patel: I love that Uncle Ben quote.
• 11:09
  Pinky Patel: However, I don't like in the beginning I used to have feel that imposter syndrome, but I'm like I had like an epiphany recently which is it's spectacular that you wanted to reach out to me now to do this podcast, because literally last week I was like I was looking out of the plane, the window in the plane, on my way to Seattle for my shows, right, and I was just like you know what.
• 11:31
  Pinky Patel: I've been given this opportunity where I could talk about all of the quote-unquote injustices to women, to South Asian women, to people of color.
• 11:41
  Pinky Patel: Right, like, take it down from the top, top level down versus women, then brown women, then South Asians, right, like that's, and then if and then, on top of that, it's the women and girls in my real life, in my circle here, right.
• 11:56
  Pinky Patel: So from top down, like that's, that's a lot of people and that's how I want to like tackle everything, right.
• 12:04
  Pinky Patel: And so I was looking out the window and I'm just like I have I've been traveling so much.
• 12:09
  Pinky Patel: I've been looking at my audience, I've been listening to them, I've been reading the comments.
• 12:13
  Pinky Patel: I was like what, like I have so much to give that I don't want to just sit and like and, like you saw, I've been working out.
• 12:22
  Pinky Patel: I've been like taking better care of myself, like even health, like eating wise, like I like Caesar salads.
• 12:28
  Pinky Patel: Now, gina, I didn't like Caesar salads before.
• 12:30
  Pinky Patel: I never did because I was just like, what is this?
• 12:33
  Pinky Patel: I don't want to eat grass.
• 12:35
  Pinky Patel: Now I'm eating grass, okay, gina, I'm so proud of you like I'm eating grass.
• 12:40
  Pinky Patel: I'm drinking warm swamp water.
• 12:42
  Pinky Patel: I'm being so amazing.
• 12:43
  Pinky Patel: Tea, tea is warm swamp water.
• 12:45
  Pinky Patel: You knew exactly where you were.
• 12:46
  Pinky Patel: Tea, tea is warm swamp water.
• 12:47
  Pinky Patel: I knew exactly where you were going with it.
• 12:48
  Pinky Patel: And, listen, I will do everything that you want me to do, but that doesn't mean I have to like it.
• 12:52
  Pinky Patel: That does not mean I have to like it, and that's the thing I want all women across this world to realize, it's that, yes, we have to do certain things because that's the time.
• 13:03
  Pinky Patel: That's where you are in your lifespan.
• 13:10
  Pinky Patel: This is the timeline you're in Right now.
• 13:11
  Pinky Patel: Guess what?
• 13:12
  Pinky Patel: You have to be a mom and you have to change those diapers and you have to, you know, be the snack witch and all that stuff, because that's your job.
• 13:16
  Pinky Patel: But when they get older?
• 13:17
  Pinky Patel: Now, your job is to focus on yourself.
• 13:20
  Pinky Patel: Your job is to focus on yourself and you don't have to like what you have to do to be a better version of yourself, but you just have to accept it.
• 13:28
  Pinky Patel: Right, you have to make yourself get up and go outside for that walk and just do it.
• 13:33
  Pinky Patel: Put the headphones in, because you need to do it.
• 13:35
  Pinky Patel: Why?
• 13:36
  Pinky Patel: Because it's going to give you that alone time that you need to have these great ideas to make you a better version of yourself.
• 13:44
  Pinky Patel: Preach, girl, preach, and like.
• 13:47
  Pinky Patel: For me, that message goes beyond color.
• 13:50
  Pinky Patel: That message is women empowerment.
• 13:53
  Pinky Patel: Like I'm the one that will tell you, as a good friend, as your best friend or your cousin, or your aunt or whoever, I'm the one that will tell you, girl, this is not what we do?
• 14:04
  Pinky Patel: How about we do it better?
• 14:05
  Pinky Patel: Women empowerment is not blindly telling women they're doing great when they're hurting themselves and or other people.
• 14:11
  Pinky Patel: Women empowerment is making sure that we are all have a cohesive.
• 14:17
  Pinky Patel: Like you know, this is important and this is really how you should feel about it.
• 14:23
  Pinky Patel: And if you don't, you'll get there in your own time, but right now you do you because I'm already there.
• 14:29
  Pinky Patel: Then you can come into that, my tribe when you get there.
• 14:32
  Pinky Patel: Mentally, everybody's different mentally, right, like that's why we have to go get therapy.
• 14:37
  Pinky Patel: That's why we have to.
• 14:38
  Pinky Patel: Not only are we physically going and getting wellness checks every year, we also have to go and take care of the brain.
• 14:47
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Absolutely.
• 14:47
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: It's so important that you bring that up because I think there a lot of times is this confusion between women, empowerment and just yesing people.
• 14:56
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: It's about encouraging growth and in order to do that, like you said, sometimes you just have to say it like it is, you know.
• 15:03
  Pinky Patel: Right and yes, the delivery matters.
• 15:05
  Pinky Patel: Have.
• 15:06
  Pinky Patel: To say it like it is, you know, Right and yes, the delivery matters.
• 15:07
  Pinky Patel: Right, the delivery for sure matters.
• 15:08
  Pinky Patel: Like you know you have to.
• 15:09
  Pinky Patel: Your delivery has to match the recipient.
• 15:12
  Pinky Patel: So if your, if your goal is to, you know, get that person who, just who, feels really overwhelmed with everything that they have to do.
• 15:20
  Pinky Patel: The message isn't witch, get your ass off the couch.
• 15:24
  Pinky Patel: You know it's not aggressive, it's they need to.
• 15:26
  Pinky Patel: They need a little bit of kid gloves, not too much, but a little bit right.
• 15:30
  Pinky Patel: It's like okay, I understand that you're overwhelmed, but what can we do to alleviate this feeling of anxiety?
• 15:37
  Pinky Patel: First thing you can do let's write a list right, like when I'm talking to my girlfriends, I'm literally am I listening or am I advising?
• 15:45
  Pinky Patel: If they say listening, if they say advising, now I'm in, like you know, corporate pinky mode and I'm like this is what we need to do to get you out of this.
• 15:54
  Pinky Patel: Everything is a corporate project for me, because that's how my brain works and I'm like you guys made me learn how corporate works, so now I'm going to use it for myself.
• 16:04
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I think that's great.
• 16:05
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: You're turning, turning corporate into good, which is not really what you associate with corporate half the time.
• 16:14
  Pinky Patel: So well, more than half the time.
• 16:15
  Pinky Patel: Well, when you, when you think of stereotypes, do you think of good or bad?
• 16:17
  Pinky Patel: You think of bad, so I'm taking those stereotypes and I'm making them something powerful.
• 16:21
  Pinky Patel: You want me, like I said, you want me to adhere to the stereotypes of what my people can only be right.
• 16:28
  Pinky Patel: Oh, your people are only doctors or IT people or engineers, or small or 7-Eleven owners or hotel owners.
• 16:36
  Pinky Patel: Well, guess what?
• 16:37
  Pinky Patel: I'm gonna prove you wrong.
• 16:39
  Pinky Patel: And then, when you're stuck and you have no money, when you're old, I will have the money because I did all those things that you put that stereotype on me.
• 16:47
  Pinky Patel: I embrace those and I excelled at them.
• 16:50
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Wow, I mean, just listening to you is really.
• 16:53
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: It's inspirational and it's motivational and it makes me want to.
• 16:56
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I don't know, I just want to do something.
• 16:59
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I love how passionately you speak about all of this and I guess I would also love to know what you would.
• 17:07
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I don't know how.
• 17:08
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I want to say this Do you have advice for people who are still stuck in the doldrums of the nine to five, but they also have a voice that they want to get out there and share?
• 17:18
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: And how?
• 17:19
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Not that everybody has the same path, but how would they use your journey as a guide?
• 17:26
  Pinky Patel: I understand that what I'm about to say is very cliche.
• 17:30
  Pinky Patel: It is a very cliche and instead of using the word but I will use the word.
• 17:35
  Pinky Patel: However, however, I feel that if I can do it, anybody can do it.
• 17:41
  Pinky Patel: Like I, honestly, and this is not me like falsely hyping women up.
• 17:46
  Pinky Patel: This is me, speaking from my own experiences these past five years.
• 17:51
  Pinky Patel: Like this is me living this life where I literally Gina, I literally, when COVID started, when they told us to stay at home, I was.
• 17:59
  Pinky Patel: I was on LinkedIn looking for other consulting corporations that did the same thing that I did at the corporation.
• 18:07
  Pinky Patel: I did it here in the Chicagoland area Because I was like they're not using me to my full potential and I'm so like.
• 18:13
  Pinky Patel: I made my own job description, I made my own position, I put process improvement things in place, but I was not valued.
• 18:20
  Pinky Patel: I was undervalued.
• 18:20
  Pinky Patel: Things in place, but I was not valued.
• 18:23
  Pinky Patel: I was undervalued.
• 18:24
  Pinky Patel: I was told when I asked for a team and it was literally, it was the director, it was me and her five teams and I had to support the five teams.
• 18:37
  Pinky Patel: I'm talking from software installation to execution, to best practices, to reports, to outputs, everything.
• 18:43
  Pinky Patel: But when I asked for a team.
• 18:44
  Pinky Patel: I was told well, your position has no ROI, so we cannot give you headcount.
• 18:51
  Pinky Patel: And so from that moment on, I was driven to find a better life.
• 18:58
  Pinky Patel: It started with me trying to find a different position, the same position in a different company.
• 19:02
  Pinky Patel: And then COVID happened and I was like I see all these people posting stuff.
• 19:07
  Pinky Patel: My friends tell me I'm funny, let me post stuff.
• 19:10
  Pinky Patel: And I and I would do it.
• 19:11
  Pinky Patel: I did it strategically why?
• 19:13
  Pinky Patel: Because I did not want to get in trouble.
• 19:14
  Pinky Patel: I would make content while I had reports running on my computer in this vagina cave and I, while my my reports were running, while I had access going I know you know all these words I'm saying I would, on the side, be making content.
• 19:30
  Pinky Patel: This is the tripod I used to make content on myself.
• 19:33
  Pinky Patel: It's literally on the side of my desk.
• 19:35
  Pinky Patel: I would post a video on the hour every hour for five hours, five videos a day.
• 19:45
  Pinky Patel: I was posting because people were putting dumb content out there and I literally I hate myself, like I'm not looking at myself at all.
• 19:53
  Pinky Patel: I, just this year, started being proud of what I was seeing on the screen, just this past year, recently, and so until then I did not have the camera facing me, I just talked as if I was talking with my friends in my backyard.
• 20:06
  Pinky Patel: I pretended I created an environment where I felt comfortable there's no audience here and then I posted it and I was like you know what, I don't have to go back to that.
• 20:16
  Pinky Patel: I don't have to go back to the video if I don't want to.
• 20:19
  Pinky Patel: I don't have to look at the comments if I don't want to.
• 20:21
  Pinky Patel: I don't have to defend myself if I don't want to and like don't have to defend myself if I don't want to and like, realistically, you don't have to do those things.
• 20:28
  Pinky Patel: It's those influencers that put that pressure on people like us, who want to be content creators, who have important messages to promote, who have motive.
• 20:37
  Pinky Patel: Like, like you said, like if my goal in life is to do something spectacular so that I can go and I can motivate people, I can be a motivational speaker because I have the experience behind me Versus a lot of motivational speakers out there.
• 20:52
  Pinky Patel: All they've done is read books.
• 20:53
  Pinky Patel: They haven't actually walked those steps.
• 20:56
  Pinky Patel: They haven't traveled, they haven't done on average for the past three years.
• 21:01
  Pinky Patel: They have not had 30 flights for the past three years.
• 21:04
  Pinky Patel: On average 40,.
• 21:06
  Pinky Patel: Actually they have not gone from city to city and been in front of people and looked at people and known what the people need.
• 21:12
  Pinky Patel: I have.
• 21:14
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: You have to literally just post I love hearing your growth, like I can tell that after being told.
• 21:21
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: What an insulting thing, by the way, to be told that you, like you, have no roi basically.
• 21:25
  Pinky Patel: But on top of that, gina, not even on top of that, it was a woman telling me this.
• 21:30
  Pinky Patel: I hate that.
• 21:31
  Pinky Patel: It was a woman director who was more concerned about how far she could piss off the fence within the men's locker room so she could be with those higher ups then growing the women who were on her team, and from that that and I didn't even know that was called lack of women empowerment.
• 21:48
  Pinky Patel: The things that I know now is because I have chosen to go online and surround myself with things that help me mentally instead of hurt me mentally.
• 21:57
  Pinky Patel: And that's the other part of this.
• 21:59
  Pinky Patel: Right, like, what are you doing to let people know that?
• 22:02
  Pinky Patel: Hey, just because you see it on your screen does not mean that's how life really is.
• 22:08
  Pinky Patel: I don't care that it's a movie theater or it's your cell phone and you think you're looking at somebody's in real life.
• 22:15
  Pinky Patel: You're not baby girl, you are not.
• 22:18
  Pinky Patel: You are looking at something that they recorded all day and they clipped it into a 60 second or 15 minute video for you.
• 22:26
  Pinky Patel: And being from that side now because before I was just a consumer, I was just a content consumer I was like, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, give me more Right.
• 22:35
  Pinky Patel: And then I went to the other side I was like no, I know what it takes and these witches half of them, a majority of them are lying to you, so it's not going to be easy.
• 22:46
  Pinky Patel: I don't want to misinterpret that.
• 22:49
  Pinky Patel: I want full transparency.
• 22:51
  Pinky Patel: Some days I'm like should I even continue to post?
• 22:53
  Pinky Patel: These videos are not doing well.
• 22:54
  Pinky Patel: And then other days I'm like you know what?
• 22:56
  Pinky Patel: I'm going to post a video that is old, that did well, that was viral and it's going to be okay because it's still me.
• 23:03
  Pinky Patel: It's your platform.
• 23:05
  Pinky Patel: You post what you feel passionate about, as long as what did I say?
• 23:11
  Pinky Patel: I said it twice already You're not hurting yourself or other people physically or mentally, and if you can check that off your list, am I hurting myself?
• 23:21
  Pinky Patel: No Check.
• 23:22
  Pinky Patel: Am I hurting my audience?
• 23:23
  Pinky Patel: No check.
• 23:25
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I wish more people had that point of view because, like you said, there are other influencers out there who don't necessarily adhere to those rules, unfortunately.
• 23:34
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: But you also said something that I want to repeat briefly following accounts that are healthy for you.
• 23:43
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: That's so pivotal in a world where we are dominated by social media and the misinformation that is available on social media.
• 23:53
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: You have to make these conscious decisions that I am going to follow people who bring me joy, people who educate me and people who are pushing kindness.
• 24:05
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I think some of us forget that we have control over what we are taking in.
• 24:12
  Pinky Patel: The thing is, if somebody is not helping you grow, glow or go, you're going to say no.
• 24:21
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I love that so much.
• 24:24
  Pinky Patel: Right, like as as a human being.
• 24:26
  Pinky Patel: If you are surrounding yourself with people that fit those first three things, then you say yes, but if not, you say no and you move on.
• 24:34
  Pinky Patel: You don't have, this is not an airport.
• 24:36
  Pinky Patel: You don't need to announce your departure, unfollow and move on with your life.
• 24:39
  Pinky Patel: You don't have to write in there.
• 24:41
  Pinky Patel: I'm so disappointed in you.
• 24:42
  Pinky Patel: Do you say that to friends where you just like you, ghost them because over time you stop texting?
• 24:45
  Pinky Patel: You don't have to write in there.
• 24:45
  Pinky Patel: I'm so disappointed in you.
• 24:46
  Pinky Patel: Do you say that to friends where you just, like you, ghost them because over time, you stop texting, you don't go back and you're like I know I haven't talked to you for two years, but I've just been so disappointed in you and that's why we're not talking anymore.
• 24:55
  Pinky Patel: You don't do that to people in your real life.
• 24:56
  Pinky Patel: So why are you doing that to a stranger's comment section just because you didn't like what they posted?
• 25:01
  Pinky Patel: Like if somebody has posted a thousand videos and you only didn't like one, then maybe the message wasn't clear in the video.
• 25:11
  Pinky Patel: Overall, you like that person and that's okay, but if you keep going back to their content and it's just not, like it's not your vibe, your gut check is just off and women have this intuition and I want women to start using this intuition because, like I said, if that person doesn't match your vibe, they're not part of your tribe, they're not you are saying some wonderful stuff here.
• 25:36
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I feel like I'm I don't know.
• 25:38
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I don't want to put a negative spin on it, I just feel like I've been schooled, but in the best possible way.
• 25:43
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: So no.
• 25:45
  Pinky Patel: And here's the thing Like the reason I feel like you can hear sometimes the passion when I'm talking about things like this is because I come from the same boat.
• 25:54
  Pinky Patel: Like we've been told that you know we can't do certain things.
• 25:57
  Pinky Patel: We've been told that we've been like we've been given this blueprint and how to be an adult, but it's the shittiest blueprint that we've been given.
• 26:05
  Pinky Patel: It wasn't a blueprint of, like you know, again, going back to corporate project management, you get smees in the room and then you figure out what the best practices.
• 26:14
  Pinky Patel: So why can't we have that for how to be a woman, how to be an adult?
• 26:17
  Pinky Patel: Let's get the.
• 26:18
  Pinky Patel: Let's get women that we feel like you know, that we resonate with in our life, that fit our vibe.
• 26:24
  Pinky Patel: Let's learn from them and then let's grow and let's create more women like that, so that when we go anywhere in this country, we feel safe traveling alone, when we go anywhere in this world.
• 26:35
  Pinky Patel: Because let me tell you, I don't know how old you are.
• 26:37
  Pinky Patel: I'm not going to ask you how old you are, but this is a message for everybody as soon as you are financially able to start traveling by yourself as a woman, you need to start traveling by yourself, because I have been doing that since October of 2024.
• 26:53
  Pinky Patel: I have been traveling by myself to these shows and I have learned so much.
• 26:58
  Pinky Patel: I have been observing.
• 27:00
  Pinky Patel: I've learned so much about myself.
• 27:02
  Pinky Patel: Because?
• 27:02
  Pinky Patel: Why?
• 27:02
  Pinky Patel: Because when I'm in that hotel room, when I'm in that airplane, when I'm in that shuttle, when I'm in that Uber, when I'm in that car commuting from city to city, I don't have noise from other people telling me how I'm supposed to live my life, giving me their opinions.
• 27:17
  Pinky Patel: So I've been having to think about things on my own and we need that and we women, we are not given that luxury to have quiet time.
• 27:26
  Pinky Patel: So the noise is not infiltrating and I want to be like.
• 27:31
  Pinky Patel: I want other people women to know it is very difficult to be the best version of yourself.
• 27:37
  Pinky Patel: I still have no idea how much protein I'm supposed to eat.
• 27:41
  Pinky Patel: I have no idea how much protein, how many grams of fiber.
• 27:44
  Pinky Patel: All I know is I need protein and fiber.
• 27:49
  Pinky Patel: So when I go throughout my day, I'm like give me food with protein and fiber, don't give me anything else.
• 27:54
  Pinky Patel: Like, keep it simple.
• 27:56
  Pinky Patel: It's hard.
• 27:57
  Pinky Patel: It for sure is hard.
• 27:59
  Pinky Patel: I'm not going to lie to you about that.
• 28:00
  Pinky Patel: But if I can do it, knowing that it's hard and hating to do hard shit.
• 28:05
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Anybody can yeah, I'm, I'm with you, and what's so crazy about what you just said is that I've been asking the universe for a sign recently because I had these plans to travel and I don't really have anybody to travel with and I was wondering I don't need anybody, girl, you don't need anybody, I know.
• 28:24
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: And I guess you just kind of gave me the sign that I was asking for.
• 28:28
  Pinky Patel: It's time, you know what you need to start doing.
• 28:30
  Pinky Patel: So after today.
• 28:31
  Pinky Patel: I need you and I tell everybody this I need you to start a notepad on your phone and it's going to be titled travel destinations and you're going to make a list of all the places you would love to go in the world as you think of it.
• 28:46
  Pinky Patel: So like if you're watching a movie today and the movie takes place in switzerland, you're like, oh my god, I would love to see the tulip fields in spring in switzerland, where the fuck it is.
• 28:54
  Pinky Patel: You're gonna write it on this list.
• 28:56
  Pinky Patel: I told roommate number three to start, that he's in sixth grade.
• 28:59
  Pinky Patel: He just got a cell phone and I was like, hey, bro, you need to start travel list, travel bucket list.
• 29:06
  Pinky Patel: So when you get older and when you have money and when someone says where would you like to go, you can say hold up, and you can pull your list up, because nine out of 10,.
• 29:15
  Pinky Patel: When somebody asks you, gina, where's your next vacation, you're probably like I don't know.
• 29:21
  Pinky Patel: Now you can go to your notepad and you can see and you can figure out where to go, and then you can organize and be like, how much does it cost you?
• 29:29
  Pinky Patel: You're probably like, how am I going to figure that out?
• 29:31
  Pinky Patel: You know how you're going to figure that out.
• 29:32
  Pinky Patel: You're going to use the tools you have.
• 29:33
  Pinky Patel: You're going to go online on Google.
• 29:35
  Pinky Patel: You're going to type in how much does it cost for me to go from Chicago, illinois to London for a one week vacation, and you will get a report on how much it costs, because the internet is endless.
• 29:48
  Pinky Patel: Let's use these resources.
• 29:50
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Yeah, oh my gosh, I'm excited.
• 29:54
  Pinky Patel: I'm.
• 29:55
  Pinky Patel: I want to motivate women.
• 29:56
  Pinky Patel: This is how I want to.
• 29:57
  Pinky Patel: This is I want to use everything that I've learned in all in 44 years of life, and I want to put it to good use.
• 30:04
  Pinky Patel: It's fine.
• 30:05
  Pinky Patel: You know what it might sound silly when I first told you everything in my life is a project, like a corporate project.
• 30:11
  Pinky Patel: But a lot of us we especially elder millennials and baby g's which is what I am right we have been taught what is it?
• 30:20
  Pinky Patel: You have to get a corporate job.
• 30:22
  Pinky Patel: You have to get a corporate job.
• 30:23
  Pinky Patel: You have to get a corporate job.
• 30:24
  Pinky Patel: You have to get a corporate job.
• 30:26
  Pinky Patel: So let's take everything I've begrudgingly learned and let's make it useful for our real life, for a life that matters to us.
• 30:34
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I mean, I genuinely think that's brilliant because we, like you said begrudgingly, we have honed those skills, so we may as well use them.
• 30:41
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Why throw them out?
• 30:42
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: They are still useful in some sense, right?
• 30:46
  Pinky Patel: just because it's not traditional mom skills, that doesn't matter.
• 30:49
  Pinky Patel: Nobody says, oh, that's, that's not dad like.
• 30:52
  Pinky Patel: So why are you telling me it's not mom like?
• 30:54
  Pinky Patel: If dad can babysit, I can babysit too, if I can be a default parent.
• 30:59
  Pinky Patel: Guess what?
• 30:59
  Pinky Patel: Dad can be a default parent, whatever part of life you're in right now, regardless if you're a parent or not.
• 31:02
  Pinky Patel: What are you?
• 31:02
  Pinky Patel: Be a default parent, whatever part of life you're in right now, regardless if you're a parent or not.
• 31:07
  Pinky Patel: What are you?
• 31:07
  Pinky Patel: Regardless if you've had crotch goblins or not, whatever part of life you're in right now, I can guarantee you you're probably like how can I make this better?
• 31:16
  Pinky Patel: So it's, it's not a mom thing, it's a woman thing.
• 31:21
  Pinky Patel: How can I make this better?
• 31:23
  Pinky Patel: Like I've been told this new tour, this, this third tour, I said what I said I.
• 31:29
  Pinky Patel: I talk heavily about what I just talked about right now, like I am on stage talking about that for 75 minutes for the part of life that I'm in right now, where there are other women, and it has nothing to do with being a mom, it has everything to do with being a woman.
• 31:46
  Pinky Patel: And I feel like this is not like it's not kids or no kids, it's not.
• 31:52
  Pinky Patel: Oh, you're indian or not indian, it's not.
• 31:55
  Pinky Patel: It's just are we women?
• 31:57
  Pinky Patel: Have we been told we can't do shit?
• 31:59
  Pinky Patel: Have we been have to?
• 32:01
  Pinky Patel: Have we had to, like I said, begrudgingly do things because that's the timeline we're in right now?
• 32:06
  Pinky Patel: But that doesn't mean that's it.
• 32:08
  Pinky Patel: The average lifespan is like 80 years old.
• 32:11
  Pinky Patel: Are you kidding me?
• 32:13
  Pinky Patel: When I'm 80,?
• 32:13
  Pinky Patel: Do you know where I want to die, gina?
• 32:15
  Pinky Patel: I want to die traveling from city to city Every month.
• 32:18
  Pinky Patel: I want to be traveling to a different real estate, different house I have in different cities across this world, and I want that for every woman out there.
• 32:27
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I want that for myself too.
• 32:28
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I did write that in my manifesting journal, so I'm I'm on the right path.
• 32:32
  Pinky Patel: Yeah, no, I'm serious.
• 32:34
  Pinky Patel: This we, we need to take what we've been taught and and turn it around and make it benefit us.
• 32:42
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I mean, you've been to NJPAC before and that's coming up soon, so I want to know if there's anything you'd like to say to your Jersey fans as we wrap up.
• 32:53
  Pinky Patel: Listen, yes, I'm going to be in Newark, new Jersey, on, I believe, friday, march 14th, and I know it's St Patrick's Day weekend, so you can start it off with me, okay, because, listen, if there's one thing 14th and I know it's St Patrick's Day weekend, so you can start it off with me, okay, because, listen, if there's one thing that South Asians and Irish people have in common and we can throw down with Johnny Walker whiskey, okay, we can throw it down.
• 33:15
  Pinky Patel: And so the message to everybody out there is I've been in and around Edison, new Jersey, and if I don't see all the south asians and brown people coming out, I might never come back.
• 33:26
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I'm just kidding, I will we're talking like a mecca here, so I get it.
• 33:31
  Pinky Patel: Yeah, I feel like if you didn't come to the first two shows, you know what.
• 33:36
  Pinky Patel: No hard feelings, because those are practice.
• 33:38
  Pinky Patel: This show is the one that you want to be at.
• 33:41
  Pinky Patel: This show is talking about all the stages of life that we women have been through and the angst, and just once you hear it, I hope you get to come out, gina.
• 33:51
  Pinky Patel: And once you hear it, it's going to be spectacular.
• 33:56
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I'm looking forward to it.
• 33:57
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I'm genuinely, genuinely looking forward to it.
• 33:59
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: This conversation has been wonderful, so I'm excited to be an audience member, and you heard her guys.
• 34:04
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: The first two times were practice, so if you missed them, you can come out now.
• 34:08
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: It's never too late.
• 34:10
  Pinky Patel: No, and then after that, you're going to be like, oh my God, I'm going to come out every time she's here because she's spectacular.
• 34:14
  Pinky Patel: Like listen, I'm asking people to just take one chance on me, Because if there's one thing I know about my own South Asians is that we are very frugal people.
• 34:27
  Pinky Patel: We are very frugal and the only time we want to spend money is if we have 100% guarantee that we're going to have a good time.
• 34:35
  Pinky Patel: And this is me telling everybody in the Newark and Edison area that you are 1000% going to have a spectacular time.
• 34:45
  Pinky Patel: So much fun, in fact, that I advise you to wear Depends to my show because you will tinkle a little bit, because that pelvic floor is probably busting is what I'm saying.
• 34:57
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Like you said, nothing is taboo.
• 34:59
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I love it.
• 35:00
  Pinky Patel: Nothing is taboo.
• 35:01
  Pinky Patel: The older I get, the more we're going to talk about things, and everybody's just going to be like get.
• 35:04
  Pinky Patel: The more we're going to talk about things and everybody's just going to be like, yeah, how come we never talked about that in real?
• 35:07
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: life before.
• 35:08
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Oh, I'm excited for it.
• 35:10
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I mean, I want to hear everything you have to say about perimenopause and everything that comes after that.
• 35:14
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: It has been such a pleasure talking to you.
• 35:17
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Should I just say okay, bye.
• 35:18
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Now I mean, that's up to you how you want to end it.
• 35:23
  Pinky Patel: It was spectacular.
• 35:24
  Pinky Patel: Thank you for helping me.
• 35:25
  Pinky Patel: Okay, bye.
• 35:28
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Okay, bye.
• 35:28
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Pinky Patel will be cracking up audiences at the New Jersey Performing Arts Center this March 14th at 8 pm.
• 35:37
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: For tickets and more information, be sure to visit NJPAC.
• 35:39
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: org.
• 35:41
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: If you liked this episode, be sure to review, subscribe and tell your friends.
• 35:45
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: A transcript of this podcast, links relevant to the story and more about the arts in New Jersey can be found at JerseyArts.
• 35:51
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: com.
• 35:52
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: The Jersey Arts Podcast is presented by ArtPride New Jersey, advancing a state of creativity since 1986.
• 35:58
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: The show was co-founded by and currently supported by funds from, the New Jersey State Council on the Arts.
• 36:04
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: This episode was hosted, edited and produced by me, gina Marie Rodriguez.
• 36:09
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Executive producers are Jim Atkinson and Isaac Serna-Diez, and my thanks to Pinky Patel for speaking with me today.
• 36:15
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: I'm Gina Marie Rodriguez for the Jersey Arts Podcast.
• 36:18
  Gina Marie Rodriguez: Thanks for listening.