Latest / The Ben Maller Show / The Fifth Hour: Benny Big Pumpkin

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The Fifth Hour: Benny Big Pumpkin · The Ben Maller Show

0:00
Speaker 1: Kaboom if you thought four hours a day 1200 minutes
0:05
Speaker 1: a week was enough think again he's the last remnants
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Speaker 1: of the old republic a sole bastion of fairness he
0:12
Speaker 1: treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
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Speaker 1: rich pill poppers in the penthouse wow the clearinghouse of
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Speaker 1: hot takes break free for something special the fifth hour
0:23
Speaker 1: with ben maller starts right.
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Speaker 2: Now In the air everywhere. The Fifth Hour with me,
0:35
Speaker 2: Ben Maller, and a happy Saturday to you. The pod
0:38
Speaker 2: sweatshop does not stop as we whirl around and round
0:42
Speaker 2: and round and round. And we have playoff baseball action
0:48
Speaker 2: today on this third day of October, the 276th day
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Speaker 2: of the year. There are 89 shopping days left. Actually,
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Speaker 2: not 89 because some of those are holidays. As we
1:00
Speaker 2: are hanging out here on this early Saturday morning, we
1:04
Speaker 2: have the building of the Panama Canal and Big Pumpkin
1:10
Speaker 2: on this edition of the 5th Hour Podcast as we
1:12
Speaker 2: look forward to a day of lounging on the hamster
1:17
Speaker 2: wheel of sports, watching the college football. And then... Also
1:23
Speaker 2: mixing in, my right hand is going to get a
1:25
Speaker 2: workout today, the baseball playoffs. But looking forward to that
1:28
Speaker 2: divisional round, Dodgers play for me this afternoon. We're on
1:33
Speaker 2: the West Coast, 1 o'clock. For the rest of you
1:35
Speaker 2: on the East Coast, where most people live, 4 o'clock.
1:40
Speaker 2: and the National League Divisional Series. I did enough commercials
1:43
Speaker 2: this week. I know it's on Fox One. I'm aware
1:45
Speaker 2: it's on Fox One. I am looking forward to the
1:47
Speaker 2: games today, seeing who chokes, who dominates, the drama-o-rama. Let's
1:52
Speaker 2: just get some drama-o-rama. The wild card round was pretty
1:57
Speaker 2: much a dud. I was hoping the other day when
1:59
Speaker 2: the Braves and the Phillies played on Thursday that we
2:02
Speaker 2: would have this defining moment in the ninth inning. And no,
2:06
Speaker 2: the game was over. In the first inning, the Braves
2:09
Speaker 2: jumped out to a 3-0 lead, and that was it.
2:12
Speaker 2: The Phillies, they scored a few runs. It was never
2:17
Speaker 2: in doubt, though. The Braves were in control of that game,
2:20
Speaker 2: and now the Braves take on the Dodgers today. So
2:23
Speaker 2: we'll see what happens there. In the American League, you
2:25
Speaker 2: have the varsity on one side of the bracket. You've
2:29
Speaker 2: got the Yankees. And the Rays, that's the varsity. And
2:32
Speaker 2: then you've got the junior varsity, which is guaranteed to
2:34
Speaker 2: get one team into the Final Four, the Chicago White
2:39
Speaker 2: Sox and the Cleveland Indians slash Guardians and all that. Now,
2:44
Speaker 2: speaking of the diamond, there is something wonderfully strange about
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Speaker 2: baseball broadcasters getting to say goodbye every year. And hello.
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Speaker 1: Hello.
2:55
Speaker 2: I noticed it again at the end of the regular season.
2:58
Speaker 2: So the regular season ended last weekend. I watched a
3:01
Speaker 2: handful of local broadcasts. Don't tell anyone. I mostly watched football,
3:06
Speaker 2: so let's not go overboard. But I checked out a
3:09
Speaker 2: few of the different games, and I was partaking in
3:13
Speaker 2: this and some of the broadcasters are retiring and rick
3:16
Speaker 2: riz in seattle the giants broadcast guys retiring as well
3:20
Speaker 2: i was looking at these different games and some of
3:22
Speaker 2: these guys i've watched over the years and some of
3:24
Speaker 2: them i know and so i wanted to check it
3:26
Speaker 2: out and i was like okay let me see what's
3:27
Speaker 2: going on so i'm watching and there it was the
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Speaker 2: annual baseball goodbye show bye-bye you know the broadcast the
3:36
Speaker 2: announcers get very sentimental they thank the viewers and They
3:40
Speaker 2: thank the listeners. They thank the producer, the board op,
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Speaker 2: the statistician, the camera crew, the sound guy, the guy
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Speaker 2: who spent 162 games locating random obscure footage of Dale
3:53
Speaker 2: Murphy from 1987. Rest in peace, Spokane Gary. And then
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Speaker 2: they say, from all of us here, thank you for
4:01
Speaker 2: spending another summer with us. We'll see you next spring training.
4:06
Speaker 2: And that's it. They're gone, gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.
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Speaker 2: See you in February. February. It's like they're working for Congress.
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Speaker 2: They get four months off. You get four months off
4:21
Speaker 2: doing baseball. And that's when I was reminded overnight sports
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Speaker 2: talk radio is the all season tire of sports media.
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Speaker 2: There is no goodbye show. And whether you get let
4:35
Speaker 2: go or not, they don't give you a goodbye show.
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Speaker 2: They don't say, hey, this is your final show. Get
4:41
Speaker 2: in there and do a goodbye show. It's just over.
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Speaker 2: Nobody plays some tune while I thank the Maller militia
4:49
Speaker 2: for a wonderful season of the Ben Maller Show. And
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Speaker 2: I announce I'll see everyone when pitchers and catchers report. No.
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Speaker 2: We just keep rolling on. Baseball ends. Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am.
5:03
Speaker 2: And we, of course, get on to the NFL. We're
5:06
Speaker 2: on to the NFL right now. The NFL ends, and
5:08
Speaker 2: we then pay attention to the NBA, which we don't
5:11
Speaker 2: pay attention to, even though it's starting with exhibition games soon.
5:14
Speaker 2: We don't pay attention until the NFL is done sometime
5:17
Speaker 2: in February. Then we have college football. We have to
5:20
Speaker 2: pay attention to that on Saturday. And the playoff, the
5:23
Speaker 2: college football playoff in January. College basketball. We don't pay
5:26
Speaker 2: attention to that until after the Super Bowl either. We
5:28
Speaker 2: have March Madness. That's always fun. Boxing, pretty much dead.
5:33
Speaker 2: Every once in a while, there'll be a boxing story
5:35
Speaker 2: that's kind of cool. UFC, same thing for our purposes.
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Speaker 2: It's got to be rare and appropriate. It's not a
5:42
Speaker 2: mainstream thing, the UFC, in terms of our audience. I
5:46
Speaker 2: will talk about it if there's a big story, but generally, eh.
5:49
Speaker 2: I do watch it. Two of my best friends are
5:51
Speaker 2: huge MMA fans. They love the MMA, so they always
5:56
Speaker 2: have that on. The Kentucky Derby? The greatest couple of
6:00
Speaker 2: minutes in all of sports. The Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest,
6:03
Speaker 2: one of my favorite events. So we go from breaking
6:06
Speaker 2: down Patrick Mahomes and then discussing whether Joey Chestnut can
6:10
Speaker 2: consume 72 hot dogs while maintaining the structural integrity. And
6:16
Speaker 2: that is my career. That is my career. And my
6:19
Speaker 2: mother was very proud. Mama Maller was very proud. We
6:22
Speaker 2: spin plates every night, and the plates never stop spinning.
6:28
Speaker 2: They never, ever stop spinning, and they do. That's a problem.
6:31
Speaker 2: They just go round and round and round and round.
6:34
Speaker 2: Here we go, another plate. Now, my career, I did
6:38
Speaker 2: some baseball stuff early on. I was never a play-by-play guy.
6:41
Speaker 2: I did some reporting with the Dodgers back in the day,
6:44
Speaker 2: and I know it's a grind because you're there every day,
6:47
Speaker 2: and you've got to go to the ballpark early. It's
6:50
Speaker 2: a big pain in the ass. You don't just show
6:53
Speaker 2: up for the game. You've got to be there to
6:55
Speaker 2: interview the manager and the players before the game. It's
6:59
Speaker 2: kind of ludicrous, laughable, and loony when you think about it.
7:03
Speaker 2: It's like, do you really need to talk to Dave
7:07
Speaker 2: Roberts every day before the game and after the game?
7:10
Speaker 2: So you end up getting there at like 3 o'clock
7:12
Speaker 2: or 2 o'clock, and you stay there until midnight. It's
7:15
Speaker 2: a grind. It's a grind. Although I would argue that
7:19
Speaker 2: doing the overnight talk show and not having anyone to
7:23
Speaker 2: really help with that, it's a situation where it's a
7:26
Speaker 2: grind as well. Getting the show ready, preparing the show,
7:30
Speaker 2: finding the content and trimming it down and all of
7:34
Speaker 2: that stuff and the podcast on the weekends and all that.
7:37
Speaker 2: So it's, you know, it's, is it at the ballpark
7:40
Speaker 2: eating bad hot dogs and popcorn? No, it's not. And
7:44
Speaker 2: many baseball broadcasters are specialists. Baseball is their world. They
7:49
Speaker 2: love baseball. That's why they're baseball broadcasters. They arrive at
7:52
Speaker 2: spring training, and they're bushy-tailed and bright-eyed, and they broadcast
7:57
Speaker 2: most of the games. I don't think anyone does all 162.
8:01
Speaker 2: They rotate the broadcasters, but they do their share of
8:04
Speaker 2: the games, and then they disappear into whatever secret underground
8:07
Speaker 2: bunker they live in in Florida or Arizona, and that's
8:11
Speaker 2: where they hang out in the wintertime, and then they
8:13
Speaker 2: come back, and they crawl out of the bunker. And
8:16
Speaker 2: they emerged sometime in mid-February looking refreshed and saying, the
8:20
Speaker 2: ball really jumps off this kid's bat. He's got a
8:24
Speaker 2: chance to make it. Meanwhile, I'm sitting there at 317
8:27
Speaker 2: in the morning talking to the black Irishman, and then
8:31
Speaker 2: I discuss the left guard, the backup left guard, whether
8:35
Speaker 2: or not the backup left guard for the Green Bay
8:38
Speaker 2: Packers has lost the locker room because he's not blocking well. Now,
8:41
Speaker 2: recently I was talking to one of my audio friends,
8:45
Speaker 2: which is a nice way of saying someone that does
8:47
Speaker 2: a podcast. And one of my buddies said, I don't
8:50
Speaker 2: know how you do a four-hour show every day. I
8:54
Speaker 2: have no idea. He said this. I felt like it
8:58
Speaker 2: was with genuine amazement. Now, it's possible that this guy
9:02
Speaker 2: was just blowing smoke up my tuchus. It's possible he
9:05
Speaker 2: was just full of crap. But the way he said
9:07
Speaker 2: it to me sounded like he thought I had built
9:10
Speaker 2: the Panama Canal, like I was part of the building
9:13
Speaker 2: of the Panama Canal. Apparently, doing a talk show overnight,
9:17
Speaker 2: I am standing in waist-deep water with a shovel, fighting malaria,
9:23
Speaker 2: trying to connect two oceans. And this guy does a 30-
9:27
Speaker 2: to 35-minute daily podcast. And he told me some days,
9:31
Speaker 2: he says, he doesn't have anything to talk about. nothing,
9:36
Speaker 2: squad douche, bupkis. I'm like, dude, now he doesn't do
9:42
Speaker 2: just sports. He does like everything. He does do a
9:45
Speaker 2: lot of sports. That's how we've connected. And it got
9:48
Speaker 2: me thinking like, okay, so just sports alone. The industrial
9:52
Speaker 2: complex of sports now manufactures content like Costco manufactures toilet paper.
9:59
Speaker 2: There is all another palette. I grew up in a
10:02
Speaker 2: different media world, and it was crazy to see it
10:07
Speaker 2: change in my lifetime. Back when I started, we had
10:10
Speaker 2: these things called newspapers. People used to wait for the
10:12
Speaker 2: news to arrive in the morning. And there was somebody
10:16
Speaker 2: driving around at 4 in the morning throwing newspapers. We
10:19
Speaker 2: had the AP Sports Wire, the sports ticker. You actually
10:24
Speaker 2: had to hunt for stories. You actually had to hunt.
10:26
Speaker 2: It was like duck hunt. You dig through the sports
10:29
Speaker 2: section looking for some tiny, tiny little nugget about a
10:34
Speaker 2: disgruntled relief pitcher for the Milwaukee Brewers who may be
10:38
Speaker 2: traded to the Yankees or the Red Sox. There it was.
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Speaker 1: Voila!
10:42
Speaker 2: Content. You protected that story like somebody handed you the
10:47
Speaker 2: nuclear codes because you needed four hours of material. Now today,
10:54
Speaker 2: forget about it. The Content Kitty is obese, morbidly obese.
11:00
Speaker 2: The Content Kitty needs Ozempic. At any given moment, thousands
11:07
Speaker 2: of professional athletes are carrying smartphones. And apparently nobody has
11:11
Speaker 2: explained to these jabronis... that the smartphone contains this revolutionary
11:17
Speaker 2: feature called Don't Post It. They post everything. Contract squabble? Check.
11:25
Speaker 2: Cryptic emojis, check, check. Relationship problems with groupies, check, check. Teammates' grievances,
11:33
Speaker 2: that's covered as well. Problems with the coach, no problem.
11:37
Speaker 2: Nightclub videos, you name it, we got it. And my
11:40
Speaker 2: personal favorite, I probably shouldn't say this, but, yeah, I
11:45
Speaker 2: probably shouldn't say this, but, God, that's great. Please say it.
11:51
Speaker 2: I have four hours to fill. Say it. Now, years ago,
11:55
Speaker 2: they had these things called magazines. People used to read those, too.
11:58
Speaker 2: And they would send a writer to spend three days
12:03
Speaker 2: with an athlete, like Aaron Judge. They'd say, hey, Aaron,
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Speaker 2: we're going to do a feature piece on you. We're
12:09
Speaker 2: going to send a writer to shadow you and follow
12:11
Speaker 2: you around. And the athlete would be like, okay. And
12:15
Speaker 2: so they'd have to spend three days just to find
12:17
Speaker 2: one thing that was interesting about the athlete. They'd follow
12:20
Speaker 2: the athlete fishing. They'd meet his parents. They'd have some
12:24
Speaker 2: spaghetti and meatballs together. They tore his childhood home. 6,000
12:28
Speaker 2: words later, you kind of felt like you knew the guy.
12:33
Speaker 2: You did. Now, today, the athlete provides everything. One-stop shop.
12:39
Speaker 2: Everything you need, usually before lunch. Sometimes before breakfast, but
12:44
Speaker 2: usually before lunch. Now, you got some water there. Now,
12:50
Speaker 2: and we do it for free. No editor required. No filter,
12:54
Speaker 2: no adult supervision. And athletes used to actually complain that
12:59
Speaker 2: the media was invading their privacy, which I find the
13:04
Speaker 2: irony of that generation of athletes compared to this, juxtapose
13:08
Speaker 2: what's going on today. It's wild. They live stream the invasion.
13:14
Speaker 2: They're recording it. We don't even have to knock on
13:17
Speaker 2: the door anymore. They removed the door. They put the
13:21
Speaker 2: door on the gram, and they started arguing with people
13:25
Speaker 2: in the comments about the door. And sports radio used
13:28
Speaker 2: to require mining. I used to own a helmet and
13:31
Speaker 2: a pickaxe and a flashlight. I had all those things.
13:35
Speaker 2: And I had them because you had to get content.
13:39
Speaker 2: You descended into the content mine, the mallor mine of content,
13:43
Speaker 2: hoping to find one decent nugget. And now we're standing
13:49
Speaker 2: underneath Niagara Falls holding a Dixie cup. It's wild, right?
13:55
Speaker 2: The challenge isn't finding something to talk about. It's deciding
14:01
Speaker 2: which ridiculous thing deserves our attention most. That's the modern
14:06
Speaker 2: overnight radio show, and really any show during the day.
14:10
Speaker 2: We stand alongside with information, and we're on the information superhighway,
14:17
Speaker 2: It's the middle of the night or morning, and just
14:20
Speaker 2: imagine I'm wearing an orange vest there. And I'm like,
14:22
Speaker 2: move along. Nothing to see here. Wait, wait, what? What
14:26
Speaker 2: did he post? What did he post? That dirty dog.
14:31
Speaker 2: And away we go. The flag is up. No off-season.
14:35
Speaker 2: No goodbye show. No four-month sabbatical. Just another night in
14:39
Speaker 2: the audio sweatshop. Another four hours. Another plate spinning. And
14:43
Speaker 2: that's it. And somewhere a baseball announcer is sleeping peacefully
14:46
Speaker 2: until spring training. And somewhere else, an athlete is reaching
14:50
Speaker 2: for their phone. Go ahead. Post something stupid, dummy. The
14:55
Speaker 2: content kitty is hungry. Yum, yum to my tum-tum. Meanwhile,
15:01
Speaker 2: now that we are in October, this is the first
15:04
Speaker 2: podcast on a Saturday that we've done in October of 2026.
15:08
Speaker 1: O-M-G.
15:08
Speaker 2: So October is upon us. This is the first weekend,
15:16
Speaker 2: and you know what that means. Not only playoff baseball
15:19
Speaker 2: and all that, the slaughter begins. What? Yes, the slaughter begins.
15:26
Speaker 2: Millions and millions of pounds of innocent pumpkins are about
15:31
Speaker 2: to be butchered across America. Nobody talks about this. They
15:37
Speaker 2: just accept it. You're all numb to it. You're numb
15:40
Speaker 2: like a bug. Nobody cares. We just don't. Deal with it.
15:45
Speaker 2: We don't even think about it. Every October, perfectly respectable,
15:49
Speaker 2: loving pumpkins are ripped from the earth. They're hauled off
15:54
Speaker 2: to supermarkets, thrown into shopping carts, and taken home to
16:00
Speaker 2: meet a horrifying ending. And you people smile. You look
16:07
Speaker 2: forward to this. What are you thinking? You take this beautiful,
16:12
Speaker 2: bright orange pumpkin and you put it on the kitchen table.
16:17
Speaker 2: You then grab a sharp knife, and first you scalp
16:22
Speaker 2: that pumpkin. You scalp the pumpkin. Then you reach inside
16:26
Speaker 2: with your dirty hands, and you yank out the pumpkin
16:29
Speaker 2: guts with your bare frickin' hands like you're some kind
16:34
Speaker 2: of Neanderthal. You scrape the poor thing hollow. Then comes
16:39
Speaker 2: the mutilation of the perfectly fine pumpkin... You put these
16:45
Speaker 2: little strange eyes in. You put the nose. You put
16:48
Speaker 2: the toothy grin there. All of that just to get
16:52
Speaker 2: your jollies off. Yeah. Lucky Tony, this is you. It's
16:58
Speaker 2: all for your entertainment. It is. I bet your fur
17:02
Speaker 2: dog's a big pumpkin guy. I bet your fur dog's
17:04
Speaker 2: a big pumpkin guy. I think so. Yeah. Imagine explaining
17:09
Speaker 2: this to somebody who had never heard of Halloween and Well,
17:12
Speaker 2: you see, every October we go out and we buy
17:14
Speaker 2: vegetables and we disembowel them. We carve terrifying faces into
17:18
Speaker 2: their carcasses. We put candles inside the rotting corpses and
17:24
Speaker 2: we display them on the porch so neighborhood children can
17:28
Speaker 2: admire our handiwork, our arts and crafts. And somehow you
17:33
Speaker 2: think I'm the crazy one. And don't tell me you
17:36
Speaker 2: respect the pumpkin because you save the seeds. Well, that's
17:40
Speaker 2: just wonderful. You save the seeds. Very humane of you.
17:44
Speaker 2: You remove the internal organs of the pumpkin. You sprinkle
17:48
Speaker 2: them with salt and bake them for 10 to 15
17:51
Speaker 2: minutes at 350 degrees.
17:54
Speaker 1: Okay.
17:55
Speaker 2: How compassionate. But who is really behind this, this thing?
18:01
Speaker 2: And I, I fell down a rabbit hole and I
18:04
Speaker 2: wanted to share with you because I thought this is
18:06
Speaker 2: the perfect time of the year. And the reason I
18:08
Speaker 2: brought this up, I went to, I was at Costco
18:11
Speaker 2: this week. It might've been at the local grocery store. Anyway, whatever.
18:16
Speaker 2: I was, I was somewhere shopping and they already had
18:19
Speaker 2: the pumpkins out. And I'm like, we haven't even gotten
18:22
Speaker 2: yet to the, to the real part of the month.
18:24
Speaker 2: It was like the first day of October. So it was,
18:26
Speaker 2: it was a couple of days ago. And it was like, Like,
18:28
Speaker 2: what are we doing? So I was like, where did
18:29
Speaker 2: this begin? Because I'm guessing this is not a global thing.
18:33
Speaker 2: And it turns out, who's really behind it? Big Pumpkin.
18:37
Speaker 2: We're going to call him Big Pumpkin. That's right, the
18:39
Speaker 2: Pumpkin Industrial Complex. They have manipulated generations of Americans into
18:45
Speaker 2: believing you cannot properly celebrate October 31st, Halloween, Unless you've
18:53
Speaker 2: got a mutilated jack-o'-lantern decomposing on your front porch. Follow
18:59
Speaker 2: the money. And you know who else deserves to blame?
19:03
Speaker 2: The Irish. And I'm not talking about Irish Spring. If
19:06
Speaker 2: you're Irish, wear the shame belt. I said it. The
19:11
Speaker 2: whole grotesque ritual, according to the rabbit hole I fell down,
19:16
Speaker 2: traces back to you people in Ireland and Britain. This
19:20
Speaker 2: is where people carved frightening faces into turnips and other
19:25
Speaker 2: root vegetables right around Halloween. Turnips. That's what you did. Apparently,
19:30
Speaker 2: people didn't have television yet, so they would do this
19:34
Speaker 2: kind of crap. The tradition became associated with the legend
19:38
Speaker 2: of Stingy Jack. Who on God's green earth is Stingy Jack? Well,
19:45
Speaker 2: Stingy Jack, a wandering spirit condemned to rolling... around carrying
19:51
Speaker 2: a glowing ember inside a hollowed-out turnip. Boy, what fun
19:57
Speaker 2: that must have been. And that is where we eventually
19:59
Speaker 2: got the name Jack O'Lantern. That is my fun fact
20:03
Speaker 2: of the hour. Stingy Jack, the legend of Stingy Jack
20:07
Speaker 2: turned into Jack O'Lantern. because you hollowed it out and
20:10
Speaker 2: you put a little light in there. And the Irish immigrants,
20:14
Speaker 2: God love them, who arrived in America during the 19th century,
20:17
Speaker 2: way back in the 19th century, and they discovered something horrifying. Pumpkins. Big,
20:24
Speaker 2: delicious pumpkins. Pumpkins were everywhere, and compared with the turnips,
20:31
Speaker 2: they were a butcher's dream. because they were larger, softer,
20:36
Speaker 2: easier to hollow out, and spacious enough to carve an
20:39
Speaker 2: entire demonic face on the front of the pumpkin. Like, just,
20:45
Speaker 2: there you go. Look at the teeth. It's missing some teeth.
20:48
Speaker 2: It's like Weed Man Hippie. So America did what America
20:52
Speaker 2: always does. We said, well, this is something they do
20:55
Speaker 2: in Ireland and Britain. Why don't we supersize it? That
21:00
Speaker 2: seems like a good idea. So forget carving a miserable
21:04
Speaker 2: little turnip. We're getting a 22-pound pumpkin from Costco, and
21:10
Speaker 2: we're going to perform amateur facial reconstruction surgery in the garage.
21:16
Speaker 2: And so by the late 1800s and early 1900s, Jack-O-Lanterns. Remember,
21:23
Speaker 2: this is all because of the legend of Stingy Jack.
21:26
Speaker 2: So these Jack-O-Lanterns had become an American Halloween institution. You
21:34
Speaker 2: just did it. You never asked any questions. And Big
21:37
Speaker 2: Pumpkin has been laughing all the way to the bank
21:41
Speaker 2: ever since. So here we are. It's the month of October.
21:45
Speaker 2: And when you see that innocent pumpkin sitting outside the
21:48
Speaker 2: grocery store, the supermarket, Costco, Wal-Mart, Sam's Club. Think about
21:53
Speaker 2: what's coming. That pumpkin has no idea. Scalping, disembowelment, as
22:01
Speaker 2: we said, mutilation, the roasting of its remains. And then
22:07
Speaker 2: after all of that, you stick the victim outside until
22:11
Speaker 2: the face caves in. Mold grows out of its mouth
22:15
Speaker 2: and eyes, and a squirrel starts eating it, just munching
22:20
Speaker 2: away on the forehead. Happy Halloween season. You monsters. You
22:26
Speaker 2: absolute monsters. How dare you? Well, it is time now
22:33
Speaker 2: for a fan favorite. It's a little ditty we call
22:36
Speaker 2: foodie fun. Hooray for foodie fun. It's foodie fun. We
22:42
Speaker 2: all got to eat. I haven't done this in a while.
22:45
Speaker 2: And I got an email from Mike in New Hampshire
22:48
Speaker 2: who said, Ben, you know, you really should have done the...
22:53
Speaker 2: The foodie fun thing and all that. I was like, well, why?
22:55
Speaker 2: Why do I need to do that? Anyway, all right,
22:57
Speaker 2: enough of that. So what do we have this week?
22:59
Speaker 2: We have Buffalo Wild Wings has teamed up with Sarah
23:03
Speaker 2: Michelle Geller for a Halloween Fright Feast menu featuring vampire wings,
23:10
Speaker 2: black garlic glazed cheese curds.
23:14
Speaker 1: Okay.
23:15
Speaker 2: Tell me more. Talk slower. Talk slower.
23:18
Speaker 1: No, no.
23:19
Speaker 2: I'm in. Yeah. I always wonder how these work where
23:24
Speaker 2: these restaurants team up with celebrities. Does that even work anymore?
23:28
Speaker 2: Like in terms of like the menu, I'm, I'm just
23:32
Speaker 2: going to go out on a limb here and say
23:33
Speaker 2: that the people that run Buffalo wild wings came up
23:36
Speaker 2: with all of those items on their own. And they're like, Hey,
23:39
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure they said, Hey, you're Buffy the vampire
23:42
Speaker 2: slayer from back in the day. Why don't we just
23:44
Speaker 2: pay you a bunch of money? And then you can
23:46
Speaker 2: pretend like you care about vampire wings, black garlic, glazed
23:50
Speaker 2: cheese curds, and all the other crap that we're going
23:52
Speaker 2: to sell. And she's like, okay, I'll take your money.
23:55
Speaker 2: Why not? Show me the money. And then they got
23:59
Speaker 2: the money on their way. Why not? Duncan, formerly known
24:03
Speaker 2: as Duncan Donuts, has released a new green apple Duncan
24:08
Speaker 2: Zero and purple marshmallow cold foam for Halloween. That seems
24:15
Speaker 2: like a lot. That seems like a lot. And what
24:20
Speaker 2: are the percentages of people that always have to buy
24:23
Speaker 2: the new item? It must be pretty big. Some of
24:28
Speaker 2: these places, every couple of weeks, they've got a new item.
24:31
Speaker 2: For example, Shake Shack, welcoming back its black truffle menu
24:37
Speaker 2: along with new mac and cheese bites. Well, I'm in
24:40
Speaker 2: on the mac and cheese bites. So Shake Shack, black
24:44
Speaker 2: truffle taking center stage at Shake Shack with They say
24:47
Speaker 2: fan favorite. How do we know that's a fan favorite?
24:50
Speaker 2: Do we know that? Well, Culver's. I love Culver's. Wish
24:55
Speaker 2: there was a Culver's around here. Culver's has introduced the
24:58
Speaker 2: new smoked cheddar curd burger. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
25:04
Speaker 2: Just in time for the National Cheese Curd Day, Culver's
25:09
Speaker 2: launched the first ever flavored curd-er burger ever. A smoked
25:15
Speaker 2: cheddar Curder burger. They brought back the jalapeno cheese curds.
25:21
Speaker 1: All right.
25:22
Speaker 2: There you go. Give me some of that. Next time
25:26
Speaker 2: I visit my brother in Wisconsin, we're going to get
25:28
Speaker 2: some cheese curds. We're going to Culver's. Right when I
25:32
Speaker 2: get out of the airport, we're going to Culver's. That's it.
25:35
Speaker 2: The curd burger has the suggested price of $ 8.
25:38
Speaker 1: 39.
25:39
Speaker 2: Or... You can make it a value basket with fries
25:45
Speaker 2: and a drink for an additional $ 4. 30. Boy, they're making
25:48
Speaker 2: money on those fries and drinks, huh? Not very much
25:52
Speaker 2: to have a drink. A soft drink is just some
25:56
Speaker 2: powder and some carbonated water. And potatoes are not that expensive,
26:01
Speaker 2: so getting a lot of money on that upcharge. A
26:04
Speaker 2: fair amount. By the way, the smoked cheddar curd burger,
26:07
Speaker 2: I'm very concerned about your nutrition. I know you're very
26:10
Speaker 2: concerned about that. 890 calories, 50 grams of fat. So enjoy. Enjoy, enjoy.
26:18
Speaker 2: What else do we have here on the food? Hooray
26:21
Speaker 2: for food. Popeye's recently debuted the new Honey Chicken Biscuit,
26:26
Speaker 2: a new breakfast sandwich, the launch of the Honey Chicken
26:31
Speaker 2: Biscuit at participating locations. So you can enjoy that. Papa
26:36
Speaker 2: John's has launched the Works pizza deal recently for $ 10. 99
26:40
Speaker 2: just in time for the football season. Papa John's limited
26:45
Speaker 2: time deal. The Works specialty pizza for a suggested starting
26:49
Speaker 2: price of $ 10.
26:50
Speaker 1: 99.
26:50
Speaker 2: I'm sure in California it's probably double that. What else
26:56
Speaker 2: do we have? Taco Bell introducing the new Daredevil double
27:00
Speaker 2: dipping burritos. This is only in Cleveland. So if you're
27:05
Speaker 2: in Cleveland, go get yourself a nice, delicious burrito. Daredevil
27:14
Speaker 2: double dipping burrito. What could possibly go wrong? Nothing at
27:20
Speaker 2: all will go wrong at all. No, no, no, no, no.
27:27
Speaker 2: What else did I see? There were a couple of things.
27:31
Speaker 2: I got a bunch of notes in front of me.
27:34
Speaker 2: El Pollo Loco, which is a Western Mexican chain. There's
27:39
Speaker 2: one right across the street from Fox Sports Radio. Launched
27:41
Speaker 2: a new cheesy enchilada double chicken bowl and other items.
27:48
Speaker 2: All right. What other items do they have? The crazy chicken.
27:51
Speaker 2: They've got caramel apple chata coffee. Pumpkin pie mini churros.
27:59
Speaker 2: Those are some of the other items they have there.
28:02
Speaker 2: I'm probably good on that. I think I'll be okay
28:07
Speaker 2: on that. The cheesy enchilada double chicken bowl. My wife
28:12
Speaker 2: loves the chicken bowl. So for her, that would be
28:17
Speaker 2: a nice thing. Let's see. What else do we have?
28:20
Speaker 2: Page down. I can't. That's not really interesting. I won't
28:25
Speaker 2: read that. I guess I can really read anything because
28:27
Speaker 2: it's It's a podcast, right? It's a podcast. Mention the...
28:36
Speaker 2: What else? KFC offered free bucket of chicken with a
28:40
Speaker 2: $ 15 plus online purchase. As they try to track all
28:45
Speaker 2: your information, like all these restaurants. Very important. All right,
28:50
Speaker 2: we're good on that. McAllister's, I don't even know what
28:52
Speaker 2: that is. They've unveiled their Halloween menu. And Crumble... A
28:58
Speaker 2: few days ago, Crumble Bakes Country Menu, which I guess
29:04
Speaker 2: ends today. So why even bother mentioning it and go
29:08
Speaker 2: enjoy a $ 10 cookie? Knock yourself out. On that note,
29:12
Speaker 2: I will get out. We have the mailbag tomorrow. Enjoy
29:15
Speaker 2: the football, the college football today and the baseball and
29:18
Speaker 2: all that. We'll have a mailbag tomorrow. Hopefully, Doc Mike,
29:22
Speaker 2: fingers crossed, will be part. Doc said he wanted to
29:24
Speaker 2: do it. We're going to put somebody else on. I'm
29:27
Speaker 2: not sure who the other chair will be for the
29:30
Speaker 2: podcast mailbag. I have an idea. We'll see if they
29:34
Speaker 2: answer their phone. Either way, there'll be a fresh mailbag
29:37
Speaker 2: tomorrow as we settle back into the NFL. on Sunday.
29:41
Speaker 2: Enjoy the rest of your day, whatever the F you're
29:44
Speaker 2: up to. There's a big heat wave here in La
29:47
Speaker 2: La Land in the Northwoods. Got to turn the AC
29:49
Speaker 2: back on. It's hot. Hot to trot here in early October.
29:54
Speaker 2: Have a great day. As Dick and Dayton would say, bye-bye, bye-bye.