Latest / Mommywood / Broadway Actress (Come From Away, Newsies, Wicked and more) and now joining the tour of Jagged Little Pill - Julie Reiber Bennett

Transcript

Broadway Actress (Come From Away, Newsies, Wicked and more) and now joining the tour of Jagged Little Pill - Julie Reiber Bennett · Mommywood

• 0:07
  Hey, I'm your host, Emily Bolt. I'm an actor, teacher, and a new
• 0:12
  mom. Once I became pregnant, I went
• 0:15
  on a hunt for answers to all my questions about being a working
• 0:19
  actor mom. And what did I find?
• 0:22
  Practically nothing. So here I am asking all the
• 0:25
  questions to try to figure out how people do it.
• 0:28
  How are mothers balancing and not balancing parenthood in this
• 0:33
  crazy industry? Join me and my amazing guest as
• 0:37
  we take a real look into the lives of working moms in the
• 0:41
  entertainment industry. On today's episode of Mommywood,
• 0:46
  I am talking to Julie Riber Bennett and this is such an
• 0:52
  insight to. The Broadway Life and I love it
• 0:58
  so much. I'm so excited to share this
• 1:01
  conversation that I got to have with Julie.
• 1:03
  It was such a pleasure talking with her.
• 1:07
  I am not as familiar with the Broadway parent side of things.
• 1:13
  So it was super interesting talking to her and seeing how
• 1:19
  she's able to juggle the insane schedule of an 8 show week.
• 1:26
  And talking about how she has the conversations with her
• 1:31
  daughters about why she has to miss certain things.
• 1:35
  And about how important it is that she has a career that she's
• 1:44
  so passionate about. And that she hopes that her
• 1:47
  daughters one day have a career that they love to do.
• 1:54
  And that was so eye opening to me to have that conversation and
• 2:00
  really talk to your kid about what it is that you do and why
• 2:05
  you've chosen this and what you wish for them in the future.
• 2:10
  Ohh, I get emotional, but it was so nice to hear her talk about
• 2:15
  that and just. The struggles.
• 2:19
  Of things like making your weekly minimum for equity for
• 2:28
  Actors Equity, or making your yearly minimum for SAG AFTRA.
• 2:36
  Just the things about how we even have to struggle as women,
• 2:41
  as mothers to get health care and our unions and how that
• 2:47
  whole system is hard. It is hard.
• 2:50
  It is difficult. We talk about a lot of things in
• 2:53
  this episode. It was such a pleasure talking
• 2:56
  to Julie and I hope you enjoy this episode and enjoy.
• 3:03
  Julie River Bennett, thank you so much for being here.
• 3:08
  I appreciate you taking your time.
• 3:10
  I'm sorry you have a sick, a sicko and.
• 3:14
  She woke up this morning, she walked in, she's like good.
• 3:17
  And then I felt her and she was super hot and I was like oh
• 3:20
  great. And tonight she has, she has,
• 3:24
  they've been playing softball like they're just, they are.
• 3:27
  We have our softball schedule is insane.
• 3:31
  And so she's had two games in a row and she has another game
• 3:34
  tonight. And but tonight, there's a pizza
• 3:38
  party afterward. And and it was also like a
• 3:41
  little Cinco de Mayo party for the adults.
• 3:44
  I was like, no. I was like, we need an outlet
• 3:46
  tonight. Yeah.
• 3:49
  Oh, man, that stinks. So do you Do you have the one
• 3:53
  daughter? I have two 22 daughters.
• 3:57
  Two daughters. So I have I have Phoebe, who is
• 4:00
  turning 8 next week, so she's about to be 8.
• 4:04
  And then I have Tuni, who is 10. I've never heard that name.
• 4:10
  That's cute. Yeah, well her full name is
• 4:12
  Ellery Tune and we just when she was in my belly, we started
• 4:18
  calling her Petunia. For whatever reason, that became
• 4:22
  Her nickname was Petunia. And then Petunia turned into
• 4:25
  tune and tune time and tuners. And then, since I'm a singer, it
• 4:28
  was like, Oh well, Tune's kind of cool to you and he, you know.
• 4:33
  As we got closer, it was like, wait, what if she doesn't like
• 4:36
  that? And so I liked, I liked Ella and
• 4:39
  Everly. So put that together for Ellery.
• 4:41
  So it's Ellery tune Bennett. But no one calls her Ellery.
• 4:44
  Like there was one one person like tried to call her Ellery
• 4:48
  consistently and she just wouldn't even look at him.
• 4:50
  And so she she's just tuned. That's who she is.
• 4:55
  So yeah, my God, yeah. Isn't it crazy that we just get
• 4:59
  to kind of pick, we pick their like names and then it kind of
• 5:05
  turns into whoever they're actually going to be?
• 5:09
  Yeah, and she definitely is tuned.
• 5:11
  Like she's Tuney and it's just, you know, who knows if she'll
• 5:13
  ever use Ellery. But I kind of doubt it because
• 5:16
  it's like she's just and I waited.
• 5:18
  I mean, we we waited till they were born to name them, which I
• 5:22
  also like because we had a we had the lists, right?
• 5:26
  But then we waited to meet them to kind of like have the name
• 5:29
  inform us after we met them. And it became pretty clear for
• 5:34
  for both of them after we met them that like like Phoebe was
• 5:37
  just Phoebe. Like she's just so yeah.
• 5:41
  Oh, sweet. I love that.
• 5:42
  Did you wait to find out the sex or did you know if?
• 5:47
  It was. I did not.
• 5:48
  I was like, you know, we were living in a when I had, when I
• 5:52
  had my first. We were in a one bedroom in
• 5:55
  Midtown Manhattan and it was like.
• 5:58
  There's no space to try to not be prepared.
• 6:01
  Are you kidding me? Like, no way.
• 6:03
  So you know, I like the idea of the surprise, but it just
• 6:07
  didn't, it wasn't logical. It didn't make responsible sense
• 6:10
  in my mind. So we found out and it was very
• 6:14
  helpful. And that way we just could plan
• 6:18
  and do the room, cuz she got the bedroom and we slept on the
• 6:22
  couch for two years. So.
• 6:24
  You know, like, pulled out the couch every night.
• 6:26
  It was great. Two years.
• 6:31
  Two years, Yep. We lived in that little
• 6:33
  apartment for two years. And then when I got pregnant
• 6:37
  with Phoebe, I was like, I'm going to kill someone if we stay
• 6:41
  up in here and there's another child and we keep sleeping on a
• 6:44
  pull out couch. Like, I can't.
• 6:45
  So then we moved to Washington Heights.
• 6:50
  Uptown and we got a two-bedroom, which was a great great size 2
• 6:54
  bedroom, but it's still a A2 bedroom apartment in the city,
• 6:58
  you know and they it's just not much room.
• 7:00
  And so then we were there for another like 2 1/2 fish years
• 7:06
  and then it just was it 2 1/2. It might have been a little
• 7:10
  longer and then it just kind of became clear that it was like
• 7:13
  okay, I think it's. I think it's suburbs time for
• 7:17
  us, you know, and everyone on Broadway, like when they start
• 7:20
  having kids, they move out to Jersey.
• 7:22
  You know, there's like all these towns out here where there's
• 7:26
  just lots of artists and musicians and stage managers and
• 7:29
  actors, and it's like a big Broadway community.
• 7:31
  Like on my within my block. Well, a couple blocks I have I
• 7:36
  mean. I have probably close to 8
• 7:41
  different Broadway actors that I know, like literally within my
• 7:44
  blockage. Yeah.
• 7:46
  And it's not, I mean, it's kind of the best of both worlds, it
• 7:49
  seems. You get the suburbs, but then
• 7:51
  you're like, right there. Oh my gosh.
• 7:54
  We came out here and I was like, what were we waiting for?
• 7:56
  Because it's the commute. I mean the commute on New Jersey
• 7:59
  Transit takes me the same amount of time as the a train from
• 8:04
  Washington Heights and it it's a more comfy ride and you can have
• 8:09
  like a beer after work on the train and it's like you know
• 8:12
  it's it's just it's so it's so easy and then you have a house
• 8:17
  with a yard. And we also lucked out because
• 8:19
  we moved out here. It was.
• 8:23
  It was a month to the year before COVID that we moved out
• 8:27
  here. So I was so grateful that we
• 8:31
  moved, because we moved out here.
• 8:33
  And then COVID happened and I had a yard to put my kids in
• 8:36
  because had I been in the two-bedroom apartment in
• 8:38
  Washington Heights for COVID? I don't know how the parents
• 8:43
  like the people I knew that were in little apartments with kids.
• 8:46
  I I don't in the city. I'm not sure I would have made
• 8:49
  it. Yeah, that's insane to think
• 8:54
  about. Oh man, we gosh, it's been a
• 8:58
  rough few years it. Has been quite the traumatic
• 9:03
  little, yes, little ride, right. So many new changes.
• 9:08
  Yeah. OK, so let's will you give me a
• 9:12
  little rundown of like of before you had kids, like up your
• 9:20
  career up until, like, deciding to have kids?
• 9:24
  Because I'm always curious at like, what ages and what points
• 9:31
  in people's careers that they're like, oh, maybe I'm ready or I'm
• 9:36
  definitely ready or surprised, I guess I'm ready like all the
• 9:40
  different. So I'm curious what your journey
• 9:43
  up until your first daughter. Well, I was very career focused
• 9:51
  and I wasn't even sure I was going to have kids.
• 9:54
  You know, I was when I moved to New York, I was like single and
• 10:04
  very driven. I moved to an apartment that I
• 10:07
  had never seen in Brooklyn and I had no idea what I was doing.
• 10:10
  I was green as green could be and.
• 10:13
  I started waiting on the streets at 4:30 in the morning for every
• 10:16
  open call that I saw. And like I just was very green,
• 10:19
  but I was like driven. And so within three months of
• 10:25
  getting to the city, I booked up my whole next year and I had the
• 10:30
  rent tour and I had this whole year booked up and I went and
• 10:34
  did that and then. Came back and then I still was
• 10:37
  just kind of plugging a lot. And like I was dating a little,
• 10:40
  but I wasn't really. I just there was no thought of
• 10:44
  family or there was nothing. But just like achieving my goal
• 10:48
  of wanting to be a Broadway actor and get on Broadway.
• 10:52
  Like that was just my goal. And I I just kind of just dug in
• 10:59
  and made it happen. I just.
• 11:01
  Went to open calls and I ended up getting my Broadway debut
• 11:06
  through an open call for a different show.
• 11:08
  But yeah, I actually, my Broadway debut was Brooklyn the
• 11:12
  Musical in 2004 and I moved to the city in 2001.
• 11:18
  So I was doing regional work and I went on tour for a little bit
• 11:23
  and what not, so I kind of just. You know, just kind of hit the
• 11:26
  streets and worked hard to to try to.
• 11:29
  It worked. It did, because I didn't really
• 11:32
  know what I was doing. And I didn't go, you know, I
• 11:34
  went to Western Washington University back in Washington,
• 11:37
  where I'm from, and I was a vocal performance major and an
• 11:40
  acting minor, but I sang opera all through college because that
• 11:44
  was just what the program was. But I also knew I didn't want to
• 11:48
  be an opera singer. So I was very just kind of I I
• 11:51
  didn't even know that there was like, theater.
• 11:55
  Schools besides Juilliard. Like I didn't know that there
• 11:57
  was like musical theater programs.
• 11:59
  Like I just didn't know any of that.
• 12:02
  And so I just kind of was flying by the seat of my pants and just
• 12:07
  kind of, I was very determined and just hoping my talent would
• 12:10
  take me. And I have been very blessed.
• 12:13
  And it did. And I got on.
• 12:16
  I got in my Broadway debut in 2004 and then.
• 12:21
  From there, I just kind of hopped shows for a little bit
• 12:24
  and I did. I jumped from that to all shook
• 12:26
  up and then and then gosh, and then what did I do?
• 12:32
  I may have to reference my little wall here and then I.
• 12:39
  After after all, oh after all, Shook up was wicked.
• 12:41
  So Wicked was a chunk of time so so after all Shook up, I went
• 12:45
  and did. Wicked in Lai was in the
• 12:47
  original company of Wicked in LA.
• 12:50
  Oh, wow. Yeah.
• 12:52
  And so I lived in LA for a year, which was great, and I missed
• 12:57
  the hiking and the food and the sun while there's no there.
• 13:01
  Like so far this year has been like barely any son.
• 13:05
  So we're all angry. We're all angry over here.
• 13:11
  And so Wicked took up a big chunk of my life when I because
• 13:16
  then I came back and I was in the Broadway Company for a
• 13:19
  while. And yeah, and it was around
• 13:23
  then. I kind of, I don't know, it felt
• 13:28
  like it was like 2006, 2007. So I was.
• 13:34
  I was getting older. I was, I think.
• 13:37
  I think it was when I turned 35, I kind of something shifted for
• 13:40
  me and I was like, it just kind of, I don't know it clicked that
• 13:47
  it was like, wait, I think I do want to have a family and like
• 13:52
  find someone to settle down with it.
• 13:55
  I don't know. I shifted somewhere and I don't
• 13:57
  really, I don't really know. Excuse me if they're.
• 14:03
  Was a trigger for that. I feel like more than anything.
• 14:06
  It was like just my age and hormonally or something.
• 14:08
  Like something just shifted. Sure, that makes sense.
• 14:12
  It really just felt like something shifted and I was
• 14:14
  like, wait, I think I do want that.
• 14:16
  I just. I became clear that I wanted it
• 14:18
  when before I didn't know if I wanted it and.
• 14:23
  And then I ended up meeting my husband, actually through
• 14:26
  Wicked. I was playing with the Broadway
• 14:29
  bowling league, and he was a photographer at the time,
• 14:33
  shooting for the New York Times. And he shot pictures of Wicked
• 14:38
  because he didn't know anything about Broadway.
• 14:39
  And so he he shot like the big show and the little show.
• 14:42
  He shot like pictures of Greece, and he shot pictures of Wicked.
• 14:46
  And so I met him that night and he got my number and another
• 14:51
  girl's number and he ended up choosing to call me.
• 14:55
  And that was just kind of, you know, that was just kind of game
• 14:59
  on. And then and then I feel like he
• 15:05
  was kind of similarly, I think going through a shift of like,
• 15:10
  oh, it might be time to grow up and like actually like.
• 15:13
  Settle down and do this and it just it just felt right and the
• 15:17
  timing was right and then I was in.
• 15:22
  I was in that my next show which was Priscilla Queen of the
• 15:25
  Desert. I did well, no, I did on a clear
• 15:28
  day. And then I got married and then
• 15:30
  I did Priscilla and then when I was in Priscilla I pretty
• 15:37
  quickly after joining I found out I was pregnant and.
• 15:43
  I guess we we kind of just dove right into trying because I was
• 15:49
  36 and he was, you know, 35. He's like a little younger than
• 15:56
  me. And it was just kind of like we
• 15:58
  both wanted that. So it's like we better get game
• 16:00
  on because who knows how long this could take, right?
• 16:04
  But we just dove in, and I had one miscarriage prior.
• 16:10
  And then the second latched right on.
• 16:12
  And then I found out I was pregnant and I was doing
• 16:14
  Priscilla. And and then I went to go tell
• 16:21
  my stage manager that I was going to put in for my maternity
• 16:24
  leave. And they actually kind of
• 16:27
  secretly told me, well, actually we're going to be getting our
• 16:30
  closing notice and if you want to be able to file for
• 16:35
  unemployment, which you will. You need to stay.
• 16:41
  This is how this is how the health insurance system works so
• 16:44
  great for pregnant women and how it works so great for my union
• 16:49
  and all of these things, because that became a whole shit show,
• 16:53
  because I ended up having to stay dancing in giant heels with
• 16:59
  a torn meniscus on my right knee.
• 17:02
  So that I could end up having unemployment and get my
• 17:06
  insurance weeks to hopefully hold me through my pregnancy.
• 17:11
  Insane. But I stuck out and I have
• 17:14
  pictures of me as like a pregnant koala in in Priscilla,
• 17:19
  Queen of the Desert. And so were you by that time, by
• 17:25
  the. I think I I closed the show and
• 17:28
  I think I pushed through until I was like maybe I mean I think I
• 17:35
  was at least 16/16/17 weeks if not like.
• 17:42
  I mean, it was way longer than I wanted to be because like.
• 17:45
  The Palace Theater at that time had all these stairs.
• 17:48
  I was way up the stairs in my dressing room.
• 17:51
  The show required lots of costume changes.
• 17:53
  They changed my costumes multiple times.
• 17:56
  I I had this bar scene where I was like this, like drunk lady,
• 18:00
  and they ended up changing my costume so that I literally
• 18:03
  could just be like a trashy pregnant woman at the bar.
• 18:06
  Like drinking. It was ridiculous but.
• 18:10
  It was the only way that I could do it because I really needed
• 18:14
  the weeks and because the the way our union works is you
• 18:18
  collect weeks to then have your insurance last.
• 18:21
  And the problem with, you know, being pregnant especially like I
• 18:26
  think in theater is because it's just like depending on the role,
• 18:31
  like you just can't do it and or you know, and so you.
• 18:37
  And if you don't have a long running show that you know you
• 18:40
  can return to, you then are unemployed, pregnant for nine
• 18:44
  months, having a baby and then like, your insurance is running
• 18:48
  out. I mean, with my second child, I
• 18:50
  literally ran out of my insurance.
• 18:53
  Not kidding. One month before I was having my
• 18:56
  baby. That like makes me wanna throw
• 18:59
  up. And I had to pay.
• 19:00
  I had to pay like $3000 to, like, keep my insurance going so
• 19:05
  that I could have my baby with insurance.
• 19:10
  Like in what world does any of this make sense?
• 19:14
  America like the. Best.
• 19:18
  But it's true. Yeah, so.
• 19:21
  So anyway, that's its own discussion.
• 19:23
  The insurance system and pregnant women.
• 19:26
  But. So, so you know that that's sort
• 19:30
  of my life up to having kids in this industry.
• 19:33
  And yeah, so, so they told you like secretly that the show was
• 19:40
  going to be closing before. So that's, I mean, that was nice
• 19:48
  of them. I guess, Oh my gosh, so nice
• 19:50
  because I was trying to put in for my maternity leave.
• 19:53
  Yeah, I. Was trying to put in for my
• 19:55
  maternity leave of which I was like and I'll just come back,
• 19:58
  but they know that if I left at the time that I said I was going
• 20:01
  to leave because if you, I guess if you leave, if you leave the
• 20:05
  show. On your own and.
• 20:07
  Then it closes. You're not if you're not in it
• 20:10
  when it closes. You can't collect unemployment,
• 20:12
  and not like unemployment is a ton of cash.
• 20:15
  It's like $400.00 or something, but still it's something.
• 20:19
  And you know, and I'm sure I probably, you know, needed the
• 20:23
  insurance week as well. So, yeah, of course.
• 20:27
  Oh my gosh. So how are you like physically
• 20:31
  in that show? Cuz I assume it's like, like you
• 20:35
  said, there's even just the theater itself.
• 20:38
  Were I dealing with morning sickness, or were you just,
• 20:41
  like, holding it? I was, if you want the honest
• 20:47
  answer, I was a miserable bitch. Oh no.
• 20:51
  So. Because I was so uncomfortable
• 20:55
  and I was like I said I wanted to leave earlier because I
• 20:59
  wasn't doing great, because I had a torn meniscus on my right
• 21:02
  knee and. I was sick.
• 21:06
  I was very sick. And that show is a ton of
• 21:10
  singing. And then it's just very
• 21:12
  physical. My track was very physical and I
• 21:15
  was like dancing. They eventually had to Take Me
• 21:17
  Out of one of the dance numbers because I like I couldn't.
• 21:22
  I just couldn't hang. Like I couldn't.
• 21:23
  I couldn't do it anymore. But they were all so kind and so
• 21:27
  helpful and they were changing my costumes and they were like
• 21:31
  checking on me and like, if I needed to bow out of something,
• 21:35
  they let me. The stage management was
• 21:36
  amazing. On that show.
• 21:39
  And so it was a very supportive environment.
• 21:41
  I I whenever I think back to that time, I kind of wish I
• 21:45
  could have a redo and not be pregnant because I loved that
• 21:48
  show so much and I loved that cast and it was like such a
• 21:51
  great time And then I feel like my first trimester.
• 21:54
  I was just so miserable and sick that I was just like I was
• 21:58
  surviving. Like, I mean, we're growing a
• 22:02
  human. It takes a lot.
• 22:04
  Yeah and why I ended up I ended up not being the kind of body
• 22:09
  that likes to be pregnant. I had with with two knee I had
• 22:13
  severe preeclampsia and I ended up having her at 36 weeks and I
• 22:18
  was very sick and and so I'm not a great pregnant person either
• 22:25
  like my body does not care for it.
• 22:28
  So yeah, yeah, it's it's always interesting when there are
• 22:33
  people who are like, I just loved being pregnant and I'm
• 22:38
  like, you love The Who. Are you?
• 22:42
  Because I get there. Was like for me, there was like
• 22:45
  a sweet spot in there somewhere where I was like, OK, this is
• 22:49
  fine. Yeah, the 2nd Trimester has its
• 22:52
  perks for sure. Yeah, short window, but yeah,
• 22:58
  like the whole time. Really sleeping.
• 23:01
  Sleeping in general, OK. Look, there are there's
• 23:05
  definitely women that clearly are great pregnant people
• 23:08
  because they, you know, the women who have surrogate who do
• 23:11
  surrogate pregnant and like these women who like love being
• 23:15
  pregnant. And, you know, I was not one of
• 23:17
  them, but yeah, yeah, for sure. So were you nervous then about
• 23:27
  when you found out you were pregnant about like how that was
• 23:31
  going to go physically and like telling?
• 23:37
  I don't know if you had like reps that you needed to tell or
• 23:41
  even just like the company itself like or had you like
• 23:49
  already known other stories of people and we're like, no, I
• 23:53
  think they'll be okay or how did that.
• 23:56
  You know, I had spoken to a few people, but it is, I think it's
• 24:02
  I I think being a woman in the entertainment industry in any
• 24:09
  facet of it is a little nerve racking to.
• 24:15
  You know, find out that you're pregnant and wonder how it will
• 24:18
  be received and what when you will have to leave your job and
• 24:24
  will you get another job. And I just think the whole thing
• 24:26
  comes with a little package of anxiety because it just women
• 24:36
  are. It's like we we like to think,
• 24:42
  Oh yes, I have babies get pregnant, it's we support you.
• 24:47
  We will do that. But especially in the
• 24:49
  entertainment industry, I just think it's a it's a bit of a
• 24:51
  show. I don't know if it's as
• 24:54
  supportive as we need it to be on many levels during pregnancy,
• 25:01
  after you have your kid childcare, after you have your
• 25:04
  kid working as a working mother, like the whole support system
• 25:08
  needs. A hell of a lot of work.
• 25:10
  So yes, I was anxious about it. And I also knew I can just take
• 25:17
  a maternity leave because you have a maternity leave.
• 25:20
  But it's also interesting with shows because it's like even if
• 25:23
  you take a maternity leave, you feel that pressure to come right
• 25:27
  back. Because how long should you
• 25:29
  really take? And do you only take this much
• 25:31
  time? Because then you might lose your
• 25:33
  spot on the show or the show might close or, you know, I mean
• 25:36
  my, my, my second, the Broadway show right after that that I
• 25:40
  did. I went back to work when Tuni
• 25:43
  was 20 months. And I did Newsies and I was
• 25:49
  actually filling in for another friend's maternity leave.
• 25:54
  I was filling in for her maternity leave and she was out
• 25:57
  for like 10 months or something and I went in to fill in for
• 26:02
  hers and then the show closed and she never got to return
• 26:06
  back. And then I ended up getting
• 26:09
  pregnant with Phoebe at the very end of that run.
• 26:14
  Oh my gosh. But that show was closing as
• 26:17
  well. So yeah, so it it's interesting
• 26:23
  because it's like she never got to return to it.
• 26:26
  And then I found out I was pregnant.
• 26:27
  And then that's when that's how my insurance got a little
• 26:30
  screwed up, because I ended up being short on my insurance.
• 26:34
  Because the show closed and I only had so much insurance cuz I
• 26:38
  had come off one baby and joined that show and then you know,
• 26:42
  didn't didn't earn enough weeks to then finish out my pregnancy.
• 26:48
  So it's so for I assume you're talking about equity?
• 26:52
  Yes, I'm talking about actors equity.
• 26:54
  Yeah. So that's so for for that it's a
• 26:58
  number, a certain number of weeks to get Okay, Yeah, cuz I
• 27:02
  think SAG is you have to make a certain amount of money.
• 27:07
  Yeah. And I've been on SAG insurance
• 27:10
  as well when I haven't had equity.
• 27:12
  I think I ended up joining SAG at one point after I had Phoebe,
• 27:19
  I believe, because I you can't just jump back.
• 27:23
  I mean, you can have your equity, but I mean, the COBRA is
• 27:27
  so expensive. Yeah.
• 27:30
  And so it made more sense to join the SAG SAG AFTRA
• 27:35
  insurance. So I went ahead and was on that
• 27:38
  for a little while. And yeah, I mean you just really
• 27:40
  makeshift it because it's such a poorly set up system and.
• 27:45
  Does not support us mothers and the timing and the time.
• 27:49
  You need to, like literally form a human being, have the human
• 27:52
  being, and then be with the human being, at least for a
• 27:54
  little while before you go back to work.
• 27:56
  I know, right? Or like, pop out this baby and
• 27:59
  then you get like a few weeks and you're like, wait, so then
• 28:04
  during that time, so after you had your daughter and you were
• 28:11
  on maternity leave or unemployment, was your husband?
• 28:17
  Also, does your husband, for lack of better, Does your
• 28:20
  husband have a study, right? Well, he's also, you know, an
• 28:26
  artist. He's a photographer.
• 28:28
  Well, he's not a photographer anymore.
• 28:31
  He's a little. He's still definitely an artist
• 28:34
  type, but he's gone through a few different phases.
• 28:37
  But he he was a photographer for the New York Times and.
• 28:40
  And Wall Street Journal and stuff.
• 28:41
  And then he became the mayor's photographer in the city for a
• 28:44
  while. And then from that he created
• 28:47
  this creative comms thing that he did.
• 28:49
  And so now he's kind of moved into that.
• 28:52
  And he has. He does consulting now for
• 28:55
  different people, for he works with, he works with like
• 29:00
  influencers and different progressive orgs.
• 29:03
  To connect progressive orgs with influencers and he does great
• 29:06
  work with that now. So he does have a more stable
• 29:09
  situation than me. But yeah I mean it's it's it's
• 29:15
  always a little a little unstable right.
• 29:18
  Whenever you're Was that ever, like, was that ever a concern of
• 29:26
  yours? I guess you you seem to have
• 29:29
  been working pretty steadily though.
• 29:33
  I am. I am very blessed.
• 29:36
  I am someone who I feel like I've always worked.
• 29:41
  When I was ready to work and I for both of my kids, I had them
• 29:46
  and I spent time with them. And during the time during the
• 29:51
  time right after having them before going into another show,
• 29:55
  I also did Symphony work. So I sing with symphonies around
• 29:59
  the company, around the country, excuse me, and I've been lucky
• 30:02
  enough to, I've been lucky enough to do to do that.
• 30:07
  And that has brought me a lot of sort of a side income as well.
• 30:13
  And I can bring the babies with me, right.
• 30:16
  So. So that's helpful.
• 30:19
  Yeah, yeah. It's always great when you can
• 30:21
  bring because to bring them with you is always nice then because
• 30:26
  then you don't have to split your income and get a
• 30:30
  babysitter. Yes, totally.
• 30:35
  Because most of the time I feel like if I would get a
• 30:38
  babysitter, it would be, then I wouldn't make anything, you
• 30:43
  know, it's like. Well, Oh my gosh, totally.
• 30:46
  Like, it's like, I mean, you usually use your entire salary
• 30:51
  on babysitters. Like when Rob was working for
• 30:54
  the mayor's office, he, you know, he would be working all
• 30:59
  sorts of hours. And you know, when you work at
• 31:03
  night, you then have to get a sitter.
• 31:07
  And I mean, it would blow. I would blow so much money.
• 31:12
  I mean the amount of money that you spend on babysitters when
• 31:16
  you have an 8 show week and you have like double you know and if
• 31:20
  your if your husband or your partner is someone who works you
• 31:25
  know random hours as well like you're you're dropping so much
• 31:29
  cash on babysitters. It's the same if you don't have
• 31:33
  family near you, you know, right.
• 31:34
  If you don't have family, that helps and.
• 31:38
  We never really had that situation.
• 31:40
  So, so when it comes to maternity leave for equity or
• 31:45
  just for the union, does it, do you get a certain amount of do
• 31:50
  you actually get a maternity leave through equity or how does
• 31:54
  that or is it just like they pay you or they just like can't fire
• 31:59
  you? No.
• 32:01
  So you get they have paternity leave so you can leave.
• 32:05
  You can even you can leave as a dad as well.
• 32:09
  But you don't get you. You don't get paid like you're
• 32:14
  not getting you're not getting paid your full salary like you
• 32:19
  don't get paid. It's like that's also the catch
• 32:22
  22 of it. It's like, yeah, you can leave
• 32:25
  without losing your job, but like.
• 32:30
  Yeah, yeah. That was the same.
• 32:32
  And that might have changed by now.
• 32:34
  Like, you know, I my, I had my kids now 10 years ago, right.
• 32:40
  So perhaps the union has grown with that and maybe you do get
• 32:44
  paid something. I don't, I don't know.
• 32:48
  But that was not, that was not how it was for me.
• 32:50
  But you could take the leave. Yeah, yeah, well then, since now
• 32:57
  your daughters are a little bit older and I assume in school, is
• 33:03
  it easier now that they're in school?
• 33:06
  Is it harder? Like what age so far has been
• 33:09
  like? I know there's pros and cons for
• 33:12
  each, but which has for you has been like more pros or?
• 33:18
  More. That's a tricky one.
• 33:19
  I mean, look when they're super teeny, teeny tiny.
• 33:23
  That was pretty great to be able to like, take, take her on
• 33:27
  Symphony gigs and like she could and that's when they're just
• 33:31
  eating, sleeping, pooping, eating, sleeping, pooping,
• 33:34
  right? So it's it's pretty great in
• 33:37
  that sense. And they go to bed so early.
• 33:39
  So it was like I could even like put the baby down and then go do
• 33:43
  my show and I don't miss anything, right.
• 33:46
  So I think there's definitely perks to the teeny tiny part.
• 33:52
  And I I I think that as they get older, yes.
• 33:58
  Does it become, does it become easier because then you're not
• 34:02
  like you're not just going all day with a toddler and then
• 34:07
  having to go do a Broadway show and be super wiped, right.
• 34:11
  Because like that, that is a draining schedule and I really
• 34:18
  struggled to like find. Selfcare time and breath for
• 34:23
  myself because I felt I was kind of.
• 34:27
  I was kind of one of those where it was like I felt guilty going
• 34:30
  to like a yoga class because I just kind of felt like I needed
• 34:35
  to spend all my free time with them.
• 34:39
  And I think I've evolved from that.
• 34:42
  But now that they're in school, it definitely makes it easier to
• 34:45
  just kind of be able to find more time to do things for
• 34:49
  yourself. Now I will say though, as they
• 34:52
  get older, I think I'm finding that the the Broadway schedule,
• 34:58
  at least the eight shows a week schedule is harder I think as
• 35:03
  they get older because you start to miss out on so many things
• 35:10
  because. Like, they're coming home at
• 35:12
  3:30 and I have to be on the train to go to the show at 5 and
• 35:19
  so and then when they're older, they have sports, they have
• 35:23
  concerts at night, they have things.
• 35:26
  And so I mean, the one thing that I have gotten better about
• 35:30
  is like, I'll just be out of the show.
• 35:32
  Like I'm not going to miss a choir concert or I'm not going
• 35:34
  to miss a championship game. You know, like I've I've
• 35:39
  decided. That like those things need to
• 35:42
  be priority And so I will, I'll just be out of work for those
• 35:46
  times. But you can't make every game
• 35:50
  like you just can't or else you're not going to be at work.
• 35:52
  So. So I think it does get a little
• 35:56
  trickier as they're older because I do think that you just
• 36:00
  end up missing more. So you have to really figure
• 36:03
  that out and schedule. And there's more videos being
• 36:06
  made and there's more. There's more things like that to
• 36:10
  try to connect because as they're older too, they're like,
• 36:14
  what? Why can't you come and you know?
• 36:17
  And it feels, you know, when they're two or three, it's like
• 36:22
  they don't know what's going on. But when they're 10 and it's
• 36:25
  like, oh, you can't, you can't come to my game.
• 36:28
  OK, thanks. And it's upsetting, you know, So
• 36:32
  it's finding that balance and as they get older.
• 36:37
  With the all the activities that they do it also just gets
• 36:42
  trickier with scheduling and you know and leaving one partner to
• 36:47
  try to schlep the two kids into different places and you're
• 36:50
  asking for a lot of help and you're that can also get
• 36:53
  expensive if you have to get a babysitter to help to drive or
• 36:56
  you know. So it's just I would say it's
• 36:58
  trickier when they're older. I think I'm finding that it's a
• 37:02
  little trickier. To have the The 8 show a week
• 37:07
  schedule, you know, cuz that's just a brutal schedule.
• 37:10
  It's it's it's a lot of work. You know you're on now, right?
• 37:13
  You're. I'm not right now because come
• 37:15
  from away closed. So I I have been, yeah.
• 37:19
  So come from away with that show we closed in October.
• 37:27
  Yeah. So we just closed recently.
• 37:30
  Well, it feels recent. I guess it's not so recent
• 37:32
  anymore, but I hit that show for.
• 37:34
  So I've never done a show that long.
• 37:36
  I was in come from away for five years, which I've never done a
• 37:39
  show that long. So it feels like I'm still sort
• 37:43
  of resetting after that because it was such a long chunk of
• 37:47
  time. I mean, the girls too.
• 37:48
  I mean my kids were like teeny tiny when I said that.
• 37:51
  And they were like. Grown up, it was the same.
• 37:54
  That's probably like most of what they've known.
• 37:59
  So is that is that a even like a conversation that you have with
• 38:05
  them about like well, the show closed and now are they like,
• 38:09
  well now what are you doing? And like, how does that work
• 38:14
  with I'm? It's such a strange career to
• 38:21
  have for your parent to have. I would think too as someone
• 38:25
  whose parents didn't not do that.
• 38:30
  Like I would think it's hard to explain, but also if that's all
• 38:35
  they know. Well, it's yeah, it's tricky to
• 38:38
  explain, but more so like I feel like I've I've experienced that
• 38:43
  it's hard for them. To transition back and forth
• 38:49
  like they you know when you're in, when you're on a Broadway
• 38:54
  schedule and your family and kids get used to you not being
• 38:58
  around at night, right? They find their groove.
• 39:02
  They find their rhythm. It's not it's not offensive.
• 39:07
  But then like you're the the pandemic happens or your show
• 39:12
  closes. And it's like this life that you
• 39:15
  never have access to, where Mama's home like all the time,
• 39:22
  and she can make dinner and she can have dinner with us and she
• 39:25
  can go to every game and she's completely, totally available.
• 39:30
  And then you go back and the kids are like, excuse me, what
• 39:35
  is happening? And I have experienced them
• 39:38
  getting kind of pissed. And having a lot of strong
• 39:43
  feelings about it because they're like, this isn't fair.
• 39:46
  Like, wait, you were, you were here and now you're gone again.
• 39:50
  And like, it was what my kids knew all the way up to the
• 39:55
  pandemic. Like, I mean, they literally,
• 39:57
  that was their life and they were used to it because I went
• 40:00
  from show to show and I kind of was always in that.
• 40:04
  And then? And then the pandemic happened
• 40:08
  and we were all home all the time.
• 40:10
  And I'm, I assume this happened to many, many families, but I
• 40:14
  mean, it was like a shock to all of their system that it was
• 40:17
  like, wait, you're here all the time.
• 40:19
  And it became this. It kind of created this dynamic
• 40:22
  in my family that we're still trying to figure out, which is
• 40:26
  like when I'm here, I am the one who is wanted.
• 40:31
  I am wanted for bedtimes, baths, food, like everything.
• 40:36
  Because I'm here because they were so used to me not being
• 40:40
  here that then I'm here and it's like, oh, you do it.
• 40:43
  We want you. And it's like, it's like now I'm
• 40:47
  here and I've been here, so can we stop only wanting me?
• 40:54
  And it's a whole dynamic issue, like it's something we're really
• 40:57
  working on in my family to find more balance.
• 41:01
  Because like there's. You can do things on your own.
• 41:04
  And to add and you have it. Yep.
• 41:08
  And it's like, everyone can help and do things.
• 41:10
  Doesn't have to just be me. So that whole thing is
• 41:14
  interesting. And I feel like that's connected
• 41:16
  to the fact that I was gone for so much and then I was here.
• 41:20
  And it's like this weird dynamic shift of like, wait, everything
• 41:25
  has to be her because she's here, you know?
• 41:27
  And so that. Soak it in until the next.
• 41:32
  Yeah. And they also know, they also
• 41:34
  know and understand that like that's my normal job.
• 41:37
  And so like if I got another show, I would go again And it's
• 41:43
  like it's kind of a it's it's hard.
• 41:46
  It's tricky. It's it's it really is tricky.
• 41:48
  And you know, I I sometimes have a push pull about it and have
• 41:54
  feelings about it because I it is hard to be away, like
• 41:58
  especially at bedtimes and to miss things.
• 42:02
  But, you know, I have my friend Kathy Boyko, who's also a
• 42:06
  Broadway actress and mom and she said something to me once that
• 42:10
  just like saved my life. And I always go back to it.
• 42:13
  And she was like, I just consistently remind my girls she
• 42:18
  has two daughters as well, that you know it it's it's hard to be
• 42:23
  away And that she wishes she could be here for everything.
• 42:27
  But that also like she loves her work and that she's blessed and
• 42:34
  lucky enough to actually have a job where she makes money for
• 42:38
  the family and for for everyone that she actually loves, that
• 42:42
  she's passionate about. That she just is so lucky to do.
• 42:49
  And not not many people get to have a career doing what they
• 42:53
  absolutely love and Mama gets to do that.
• 42:56
  And I can only hope that you, when you grow up, that you
• 43:00
  follow your dreams and that your job and that your how you make
• 43:04
  money is something that you love as much as what what?
• 43:08
  I'm such a new mom. I'm like crying over here.
• 43:11
  I'm telling you see your cry. When she said this to me, it was
• 43:14
  like a it was just this like light bulb of help and love and
• 43:21
  like, Oh my God, that is so beautiful and meaningful and
• 43:27
  like it just really honors. It really honors like everyone's
• 43:33
  emotional pull with this because I have emotional pull with it
• 43:36
  because I love what I do, but I love my family and the girls
• 43:40
  have a pull because they want me to be happy and they've seen me
• 43:43
  working and on stage and they think it's amazing, but then
• 43:46
  they also want their Mama home all the time.
• 43:48
  And so when she said this, I was just, my mind was blown and I
• 43:52
  was crying and I was so grateful.
• 43:54
  And I returned to it all the time with them, with myself to
• 43:59
  like just give us all like the peace and love that we need so
• 44:04
  that we can all be fulfilled. You know, because it is really
• 44:08
  important that us moms like that we have to fill our cup and do
• 44:14
  for us too. And it's so hard.
• 44:17
  Like I still just I I fail at that all the time because we
• 44:22
  just automatically like give, give, give, give to them and we
• 44:25
  will sacrifice everything for you know we won't we'll just
• 44:28
  sacrifice it so that we can do what they need.
• 44:31
  And so it was so meaningful when she said that it was just like
• 44:36
  and I I keep that so close to my heart.
• 44:39
  So I'm glad that. I mean thanks Kathy.
• 44:43
  Yeah. Because not not only is it the a
• 44:47
  job you love, it's like. It's literally a dream.
• 44:51
  Like you're so many people's dream that's like come true.
• 44:57
  And like you said, a lot of people don't, A lot of people
• 45:01
  don't get that into, people don't like and our parents
• 45:05
  didn't. I mean, you know, like the
• 45:08
  majority of people work to work. We work because we have to work,
• 45:13
  right? And there is a very small
• 45:15
  percentage of people that actually do work that they love,
• 45:18
  that they're passionate about, that is like the their dreams,
• 45:21
  that is their like heart and soul of what they're made to do,
• 45:25
  like very few people. And so it's like, it's such a
• 45:28
  blessing when you think about it that way and when you present it
• 45:31
  that way to your kids, it hopefully gives them inspiration
• 45:36
  and insight to be like, oh, so even though it's hard, like
• 45:39
  that's what I want to do, I I want that for myself.
• 45:43
  And my mom wants that for me. And I get to watch her be the
• 45:46
  example of that. Right.
• 45:47
  So it's it's really, really meaningful when we present it
• 45:52
  that way. And that's how it should be
• 45:54
  presented because, like, you know, nobody's doing anything
• 45:57
  wrong by, like, following my dreams and doing what I love to
• 46:01
  do, right. I should be able to have both.
• 46:04
  So yeah. I love that, yeah.
• 46:06
  Because I always struggle with the idea of like, because I'm
• 46:12
  still pursuing, like, I'm nowhere near where I would dream
• 46:19
  for my career to be. So to be in that weird space
• 46:23
  where I'm like, continuing to pursue my career.
• 46:28
  But being like, am I being selfish?
• 46:30
  Should I get like? I don't know.
• 46:34
  I don't even know what nine to five jobs are.
• 46:37
  Like, what would I do? But then I'm like, yeah, I want
• 46:41
  to show her that. Like, yeah, it's hard, but I'm
• 46:44
  still pursuing, so that's. Oh my God.
• 46:48
  It's yeah, powerful though, right?
• 46:52
  Because it's like what you're just saying right there, like
• 46:54
  your instinct on automatically is to be like, well, should I
• 46:57
  get a nine to five? Should I change?
• 46:59
  Should I should I make this be something that it's supposed
• 47:02
  that it's quote, UN quote supposed to be that I'm the kind
• 47:05
  of mom that I'm supposed to be, which is like just always
• 47:08
  available and always here and always doing everything.
• 47:11
  And it's like this is what needs to shift because like, it
• 47:16
  doesn't. It doesn't have to be that way.
• 47:19
  And I honestly like, I also just wonder how much it serves them
• 47:22
  because you know, in other countries like they aren't, you
• 47:27
  know that the moms aren't always there so much in the way that we
• 47:33
  are here. And so it's just like I think
• 47:36
  that when you have the healthy balance, there's nothing better
• 47:41
  for them, right, Because it gives them the independence and
• 47:45
  you are still like a a support system and a parent that like is
• 47:50
  nailing it, you know, so. Like you're still?
• 47:54
  You're always going to be the mom.
• 47:57
  But they still need a village. They don't need trust a mom.
• 48:03
  Like as if we think of other people who were around when I
• 48:07
  was growing up, like my parents both worked.
• 48:10
  They weren't around all the time.
• 48:12
  I had my two older sisters that like I would basically took care
• 48:18
  of me, I'm sure. But yeah, oh man.
• 48:23
  Have your daughters shown any interest in Yeah, they, they
• 48:33
  both have. One of them seems to definitely
• 48:36
  be a little carbon copy of me in that sense.
• 48:39
  I mean she's just constantly performing and singing and
• 48:43
  dancing and and then the other one also like has a real knack
• 48:47
  for it like she was. She was pretty much the star of
• 48:51
  the school little Broadway show that we did.
• 48:54
  And she took the stage and did terrific.
• 48:57
  And they both are just, yeah, they both enjoy it.
• 49:01
  We'll see. I mean, you know, of course my
• 49:03
  instinct is like, oh God, don't do that.
• 49:07
  But I definitely also want to make sure that they I just, I
• 49:12
  just sincerely want them to to really find things for
• 49:16
  themselves. You know, like, I mean this was
• 49:19
  something for me that like I just kind of always had and I
• 49:23
  always knew that like this is what I'm supposed to do.
• 49:26
  And I feel very lucky in that sense cuz cuz not everyone has
• 49:32
  that and I feel like I very. I was very clear that it's just
• 49:37
  like this is just what I do and I want them to find that
• 49:42
  whatever that is, and if it is the arts, then God love them and
• 49:46
  holy moly hold on. But you know, but whatever it
• 49:51
  is, I just want them to be passionate about whatever they
• 49:55
  end up wanting to do. And it doesn't have to be one
• 49:58
  thing either. It's like just just find it and
• 50:01
  and explore and like figure that out for themselves, you know?
• 50:06
  Are they at all because? The idea to me of having a
• 50:10
  parent that's been on Broadway, I'd be like, Oh my God, I talk
• 50:14
  about my sister like all the time.
• 50:16
  They like when kids that I teach talk about Wicked, I'm like my
• 50:21
  sister was on that show. You guys, they It's weird though
• 50:26
  as a parent because most kids really don't care what their
• 50:30
  parents do. But that is such like a big
• 50:35
  deal, do they? Do they realize how big of a
• 50:39
  deal it is? Do they care?
• 50:41
  Do they? I mean, I think that they they
• 50:45
  soak it up a little bit when they go to shows, Like when
• 50:48
  they've come to see me in shows or when they've seen me sing
• 50:52
  with symphonies or when they've come to the shows, they
• 50:55
  definitely like feel that vibe. But other than that it always,
• 51:01
  it was definitely like a fun perk like going to the theater
• 51:04
  and going to my dressing room and all of that stuff that we
• 51:06
  got to do before COVID. But, but then the other, the
• 51:14
  other side of it, like, I think it's just kind of like like
• 51:17
  that's, you know, yeah, my mom does that, you know, And it's
• 51:20
  like, I don't, I don't know if it's really that big of a deal,
• 51:24
  you know? I guess like you said, there's
• 51:26
  like eight people on your block that are well, yeah there's it's
• 51:29
  it's kind of a it's a no big deal around here because.
• 51:32
  There's a lot of us. Yeah.
• 51:34
  It's like my, my daughter's dance teacher is our neighbor
• 51:37
  who's been in Broadway and you know her, they're friends with
• 51:41
  across the street. And Ashley Brown lives across
• 51:43
  the street who was the first Mary Poppins, and she's friends
• 51:46
  with her daughter. It's like, so we are kind of all
• 51:48
  here together, so it's not that special.
• 51:54
  West Orange, NJ, at least. Yeah, that's hilarious.
• 51:58
  But I mean, it is very special. It's the most special.
• 52:03
  That's so funny though, that it's just a whole We're just
• 52:08
  still on the Broadway. No big deal.
• 52:11
  Totally normal. That's so funny.
• 52:16
  But oh boy, man. I appreciate you taking your
• 52:20
  time and talking with me. I'm one of my favorite things to
• 52:25
  ask people at the end is what has been your lifesaver at the
• 52:33
  moment? Either or it could be like there
• 52:37
  was a lifesaver when they were a baby.
• 52:39
  Just any lifesaver like either a product or a mantra or.
• 52:48
  I mean, definitely what your friend said before zoom is that
• 52:54
  which was amazing. Anything.
• 52:56
  That's just, like, helping you out right now.
• 53:02
  Gosh, what's helping me out right now?
• 53:06
  Or a show? Or a podcaster.
• 53:10
  No. See, I like, yeah, I mean, I do.
• 53:13
  I love me some Doctor Becky. I don't know if you listen to
• 53:16
  Doctor Becky, but love me some Doctor Becky.
• 53:20
  And she has been very helpful as my kids have gotten older.
• 53:25
  She's a therapist and and she like, she's terrific.
• 53:29
  You got to check her out and she's got a lot of little things
• 53:33
  that help me, you know, I think as as kids get older, I just,
• 53:44
  you know, my girls are starting to like throw some sass back at
• 53:47
  me and stuff. And so I think for me right now
• 53:53
  it's about just like really calming and working on my
• 53:56
  triggers as man, they will say stuff to me sometimes and I will
• 54:01
  just be like, you know, and like the the, like old school mom in
• 54:05
  me comes out more of how, like I was raised and a little more of
• 54:10
  like, excuse me, you do not talk, you know, that kind of
• 54:13
  thing, which I'm trying not to do thanks to Doctor Becky.
• 54:19
  Because honestly, it's like it's part of their development to to
• 54:25
  like stand up to me and like push those boundaries and not so
• 54:29
  much be rude, but like challenge me in that way to be able to say
• 54:37
  instead of to to to make them not speak to me in that way to
• 54:42
  more so be like, you know, I know you don't mean that and you
• 54:48
  know I can see that you're having a hard time.
• 54:50
  So I'm just going to take some space because I don't want to
• 54:53
  have, I don't want to be called names.
• 54:54
  So I'll be over here and I'll check back in kind of thing and
• 54:59
  excuse me and like finding seeing how they react
• 55:04
  differently has been really great for me lately.
• 55:11
  To be able to like stop myself, be able to respond differently
• 55:16
  and then kind of remove myself and then see how they how they
• 55:20
  shift. And just kind of like having
• 55:24
  less of that kind of crackdown authoritarian stuff that I was
• 55:29
  raised with and more of the giving them space to kind of
• 55:35
  sometimes be a little shit and like just be able to be like
• 55:41
  okay, I know that's not who you are you're you're just doing a
• 55:44
  thing. So I'm going to I'll be over
• 55:46
  here and you know and in the meantime like, you know I don't
• 55:52
  feel like being being spoken to that way.
• 55:54
  So I'm going to you know and like seeing how they really do
• 55:57
  like you know, like they get it and we don't have to be so firm
• 56:04
  all the time, you know, and I certainly am not able to do it
• 56:07
  all the time because we have our ways that we grew up with and
• 56:10
  that especially as they get older that you start being very
• 56:14
  quickly and those little triggers just come up and it
• 56:17
  happens all the time and it's just.
• 56:20
  And so I think just really working on having the awareness
• 56:24
  around those moments so that I can keep myself calmer, which
• 56:28
  then in turn keeps everyone calmer.
• 56:31
  And that's just my biggest challenge, you know, especially
• 56:34
  just being home more, you know, because that always that always
• 56:38
  adds an extra layer of stress. So that's my that's my favorite
• 56:42
  thing right now is Dr. Becky and then trying her little things
• 56:45
  also. I'll have to check her out.
• 56:49
  Yeah. I imagine there's a lot of, a
• 56:51
  lot of female energy, the whole lot of female energy up in my
• 56:56
  house and we are three very strong female energies.
• 57:00
  My girls are just like me and I'm a, I'm a fighter and I'm a,
• 57:04
  you know, I'm all these, I'm like a justice fighter and all
• 57:08
  these things and they are the same.
• 57:09
  I mean my, my eldest, this will tell you exactly.
• 57:12
  So my eldest held the protest the other day up in the hallway
• 57:16
  and she tied herself with rope to her desk chair and rolled
• 57:20
  around protesting how she needs her own bedroom.
• 57:24
  And she was like, I what was she?
• 57:27
  She was she was she was saying justice now for her bedroom,
• 57:32
  like she like chanting. And then she, she made a
• 57:35
  petition, a quote petition. And some of the signatures were
• 57:40
  Sally Ride and Martin Luther King and the mayor of West
• 57:47
  Orange. I mean, because she's
• 57:49
  protesting. Doing her work, I mean.
• 57:52
  But she is like fighting for her own room.
• 57:56
  So yes, I have two very strong willed, very sassy girls, but
• 58:03
  I'm, I'm fine. With that, I'm fine with that.
• 58:07
  And that's what I that's what I'm trying to do, right, is just
• 58:10
  be okay with that because do you want them to be like that?
• 58:13
  Like, you know, I want them to be like that.
• 58:16
  I don't want them to be soft spoken and feel like they can't
• 58:21
  speak their truth. So when they're angry, it's
• 58:23
  okay. They get to be angry.
• 58:24
  I just need to not let that anger, like, fire me up so that
• 58:27
  I'm angry. Right.
• 58:28
  So it's, yeah. Yeah, I tried to do that.
• 58:32
  I mean, my daughter's only almost 11 months, but when?
• 58:37
  But she will scream. She's not upset, but she will
• 58:40
  just like scream. It sounds like bloody murder and
• 58:47
  and but she's not upset and I'll be like.
• 58:50
  You know, you're just. I want you to share your voice.
• 58:56
  We do also have neighbors. That's Okay.
• 59:03
  Oh, that's so funny. Yes, Raising strong women with
• 59:08
  big voices, That's not a problem.
• 59:11
  Yep, we could do it. You need all of them.
• 59:14
  Oh, my gosh. Well, thank you so, so much for
• 59:18
  talking. Thanks for having me.
• 59:20
  Yeah, it's so great talking to you.
• 59:21
  So nice meeting you. And that's our episode.
• 59:26
  Thank you so much to my guest. And a special thank you to my
• 59:30
  producer, Cecilia Tripp with Laurel Canyon Creative.
• 59:35
  And thank you to Edith Mudge for our theme music.
• 59:39
  And I hope you enjoyed having a look into Mommywood.
• 59:45
  Don't forget to follow Mommywood podcast on Instagram and TikTok
• 59:52
  and please. Give us a nice review and a few
• 59:56
  stars while you're at it. We would appreciate it so, so
• 1:00:00
  much and take. Care.