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The Truth About Being the "Next Wife" (No One Says Out Loud) · Inside The Moms Club

• 0:04
  Speaker 1: Welcome Mom's Welcome to Inside the Mom's Club. I'm your host,
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: Monica Samuels, and I am here with my new co host.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: That new co host we still have, Julie, is still
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: a cost but our addition, Constanza Montalva, Welcome to Inside
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: the Mom's Club. Nice to have you join us as
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: a fellow mom. We thought it would be good to
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: have a millennial mom. We thought it would be helpful
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: for the show and for all of you and the
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: audience out there who have kids going into middle school
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: and high school to have that perspective. And so it
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: would be nice to have a friend of ours too,
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: because the show is all about friendship and women's friendship,
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: and Constanza is actually a friend of you and Julie.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: So we want to introduce you a little bit. So, Constanza,
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: you have three minutes to tell us your whole life story,
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: no pressure. Yeah, tell us about yourself.
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: So originally from Brazil, Brasilia, I live in Miami now
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: for over ten years with my wonderful fiance and I
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: have a little one, she's eleven years old. I'm really
• 1:09
  Speaker 3: excited to be here. I've been actually following Inside the
• 1:11
  Speaker 3: Mom's Club for quite some time. I have vacation with
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: Monica all throughout so have seen only her her good side,
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: which has been you know, pretty phenomenal, and.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: Yes side I have, so that's just no, it's been fun.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: So we have traveled all over the world together and
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: experienced a lot of things together, and I mean she
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: and I are still friends, even though on a last
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: trip last year, actually before we left on our trip,
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: my husband, who had been exposed to COVID, he said, oh,
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: I've been exposed, and he's sniffling and coughing and sneezing,
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: and I had just arrived with the hotel, like, you're sick,
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: and he's like, no, no, but I have been exposed
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: to COVID. I was like whatever. So we get to
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: the island and I get sick, I get COVID and
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: somehow he doesn't know how because it certainly wasn't him,
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: because he didn't do that. But you got it from
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: me when you got home, and you were so kind
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: not to say anything about it for like six months.
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: I didn't realize that I had actually gotten you, gotten
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: you six So I think what.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: You forgot to mention that it was my birthday weekend?
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: Oh that's right, we ruined her birthday weekend through that.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: You know, you can be friends for a life.
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: So yeah, I think you guys are also quarantined. If
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: I remember correctly. We had Mark stay in one room
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: separately to Monica.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: So it was an interesting, great.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: Birthday trip for her. She really had had a blast.
• 2:40
  Speaker 3: I think told her I earned my spot to be
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: here today, so he did well her spot.
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: Actually that's how we're paying her back. We said, yeah,
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: well you can be on the show. After that happened. Well,
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: so you're you're you're our millennial mom. So your daughter
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: is how old?
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  Speaker 2: Eleven?
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  Speaker 1: And she's going into what grade?
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: That's currently in fifth grade?
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: Going into sixth Okay, well, this is why we have
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: Constanza on the show because for you moms out there
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: who have been through it already, the middle school years
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: and the high school years are the worst. So we
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: are going to We're here for you, Julie, and I
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: will be here to support you all the way through
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: because once you get past that age, it's pretty much
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: smooth sailing after that.
• 3:23
  Speaker 3: Okay, good to know, yea reassurance you just survived that.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: You can pretty much survive anything.
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: I mean, I'm ready I've buckled up since she was born,
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: so it's been a fun rite well.
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: And she's a sweet girl, she really is. She's such
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: a nice girl. Because we traveled with her too, and
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: she gave me a little like what was it. She
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: gave me a little thing to put on my laptop.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: It's a little doll or something.
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: But she collects mementos, so she finds solas and just
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: being grounded with certain little items.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: That she collects throughout our travels. So it's very sweet.
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  Speaker 3: If she has a liking for you, she actually will
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: give you something for you to take home with you
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: that brings you peace.
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  Speaker 1: So yeah, well she gave me something, yeah, which was
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: very nice on the train when I guess I looked
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: really stressed or something and she said, would you do
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: you want this? So yeah, she's really sweet.
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: I remember that.
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  Speaker 1: It was very nice. So yeah, it's very exciting. And
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: you have a wedding coming up. I do.
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  Speaker 2: I do.
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  Speaker 3: Actually, I'll go ahead and say the date March twenty seventh,
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  Speaker 3: so it's right around the corner in Miami, in beautiful Miami.
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  Speaker 3: And surprisingly I'm very calm. I thought i'd be a
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  Speaker 3: little bit more nervous, but I don't know. I guess
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  Speaker 3: I'm a chill bride.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: You could say, well, you know what they say about
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: chillbrides the day of the wedding and call like, no,
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  Speaker 1: I'll be there for you because I'm going to be there.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I know. I can't wait. I can't wait to
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  Speaker 2: have you.
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  Speaker 1: No, it's going to be great, think so I'm looking
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  Speaker 1: forward to it.
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  Speaker 4: I know.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: Well, this is so much fun to have you on
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: the show. And we have a very fun show, super
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: fun show. So I'm going to introduce our guest. She
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: is a wife, mother, and businesswoman who enjoys writing and
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: a good pair of Manola Blonis. You and I totally
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: can relate to that. She is the former mayor of Colleyville, Texas,
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  Speaker 1: and a prolific writer. Her work includes this book, Cinderella
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: Has Cellulite and other Musings from a Last Wife. She
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  Speaker 1: and her husband Herb, live in Dallas. Please welcome Donna
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  Speaker 1: arp Weitzman. Donna, Welcome to the Mom's Club.
• 5:18
  Speaker 5: Hi everyone, Hi Monica Hasconza.
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  Speaker 1: I are so thrilled to have you.
• 5:24
  Speaker 5: Well, I'm thrilled to be here. I I am in
• 5:27
  Speaker 5: Dallas and you guys are in Austin. And you know
• 5:31
  Speaker 5: what they say about every Texan. We can live anywhere,
• 5:34
  Speaker 5: but our hearts in Austin, so welcome.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: That's right, that's right. And I'm originally from Dallas, so yeah, no,
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: it is. It is great. Yes, I go back frequently.
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: And well, actually, you know what you are. I got
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: to tell you. You are getting me back permanently. I
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: have to tell you because my husband, who's a prolific shopper,
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: he he can't help but buy things. So he bought
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: us a funeral plot at Sparkman Hillcrest. You look, not me.
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: Oh we're going to be neighbors, so there you go. Yeah,
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: so yeah, because he wanted me to be able to
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: over see demons. Now I hope they don't move them all,
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: because then that would be you know, what was the point.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: Then I'll be a long Central Expressway.
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  Speaker 5: But I have a story to tell you about being
• 6:17
  Speaker 5: buried at Spartman Hillcrest if you're a second wife, so
• 6:21
  Speaker 5: we can talk about them.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: You know what, I think I know a little bit
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: about some of that because my father was never gonna die,
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: so when he did die, he had no plot, and
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: so we had to go search for one. So there
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: was this place called lots for Less and they were
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: reselling lots that people were and it was it was
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: that it was that way. It was like the second
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  Speaker 1: wife did not want the first wife buried, so there
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: were ex there were these plots available from that situation. Yeah,
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: I bet you have some good stories too, but yes,
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: there's I had.
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  Speaker 5: To be buried on top of my husband and his
• 6:54
  Speaker 5: first wife is buried underneath him. So we're a tryad.
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: Oh wow, yeah, there you go.
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  Speaker 2: My be your story about it?
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  Speaker 1: That might there you go. Yes, Well, tell us a
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: little bit about so your book that you've written several books.
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: We'll get into that. Your book Cinderella Has Cellulite is
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: about I mean when I first saw it, I thought,
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: is this about looking good and you know, like being
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: like keeping your cellulite in bay or whatever. But it's
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: not about that. It's about being the last wife. Tell
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  Speaker 1: us a little bit about what prompted you to write
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: the book and what it's about.
• 7:29
  Speaker 5: Well, first of all, I'm the last wife so far.
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  Speaker 5: That doesn't mean you're always a last wife. But you
• 7:35
  Speaker 5: have to take the position that you hope you're going
• 7:37
  Speaker 5: to be right.
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  Speaker 1: That's true. Henry the Eighth's wives all thought they were
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  Speaker 1: the last wife.
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  Speaker 2: That's right until it.
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  Speaker 5: Yeah, you notice I said musings from the last Wife.
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  Speaker 5: What prompted me to write it was remarrying when I
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  Speaker 5: was sixty years old and dating when I was in
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  Speaker 5: my late fifties, and I lived in a perpetual state
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  Speaker 5: of shock, surprise, exhilaration, and depression. So it depended on
• 8:08
  Speaker 5: the moment and the time. And so that was about
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  Speaker 5: five years of up and down dating at that age.
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  Speaker 1: What is the biggest thing you if you were giving
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  Speaker 1: an advice now that you doubt that you're a last wife,
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  Speaker 1: what's the number one thing after that experience that you
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: would advise a woman in that position to.
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  Speaker 5: Keep your humor? I think I think that's what saved
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  Speaker 5: me because I wasn't ready for all of the ups
• 8:35
  Speaker 5: and downs of a later dater relationship. And I did
• 8:41
  Speaker 5: for a few years do a podcast actually for when
• 8:46
  Speaker 5: we called it the Later Dater, and so I had
• 8:49
  Speaker 5: lots of women on and a few guys on to
• 8:52
  Speaker 5: talk about dating after you know, forty five, fifty whatever.
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  Speaker 5: And so my one piece of advice is try to
• 9:00
  Speaker 5: everything through at least some humor, because you are going
• 9:04
  Speaker 5: to have some ups and downs, some great times and
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  Speaker 5: some not so great times.
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's definitely necessary. And I see that
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: with some of my friends that are in that position,
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: or even some other people that I know. Let's just
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: put it that way about with those kind of situations.
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: For example, you marry you're marrying this gentleman, and everybody
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: behind the scenes is saying, oh, she's a gold digger,
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: So tell us a little bit about he is. Oh yeah, well, I.
• 9:36
  Speaker 5: Think there's a there's a chapter in my book and
• 9:39
  Speaker 5: I wrote it ten years ago in July. So the
• 9:42
  Speaker 5: book has been selling on Amazon and in bookstores really
• 9:45
  Speaker 5: around the world. It's done in twelve languages, now wow,
• 9:50
  Speaker 5: for ten years. It came out in July of twenty
• 9:53
  Speaker 5: Actually it's eleven years old. It came out in July
• 9:55
  Speaker 5: twenty fifteen. But there is a chapter in there that says,
• 9:59
  Speaker 5: if he's rich, a bitch And I depend on that because,
• 10:04
  Speaker 5: excuse me, most people that if you are marrying a
• 10:07
  Speaker 5: man of means, people become very suspicious of you, especially
• 10:11
  Speaker 5: his friends. Now your friends are pretty much delighted or
• 10:14
  Speaker 5: else they're really mad as hell.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: One of the others, well, speaking of the people that
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: might be mad as hell. Tell us about the step
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: children or the children from the first marriage, because I've
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: been to a few of these weddings and I've seen
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: the kids and there's a lot of there's not the
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: kind of looks you're expecting to see at a wedding,
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: and there's a lot of eye rolling, and then they're God,
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: they're talking behind the scenes to each other, and you
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: know it's not good. So tell us a little bit
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: about that aspect. What if what if he or she
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: has children, how does that play into it?
• 10:48
  Speaker 5: Well, we have I had two sons when we got married,
• 10:51
  Speaker 5: and he has two daughters. And actually my stepdaughters were
• 10:55
  Speaker 5: really good at the wedding, so I didn't I didn't
• 10:58
  Speaker 5: have any issue. They but for several years, and it
• 11:04
  Speaker 5: was probably my fault more than theirs. And that's when
• 11:06
  Speaker 5: I say, we have to have humor in these circumstances
• 11:09
  Speaker 5: till time takes because time does go by and things
• 11:12
  Speaker 5: get better. But I had this feeling that I was
• 11:15
  Speaker 5: totally unnecessary in the situation. When there was his family,
• 11:20
  Speaker 5: I was kind of like a not only a third will,
• 11:22
  Speaker 5: probably about a twenty fifth whell. And so that unnecessary
• 11:27
  Speaker 5: feeling when you've been a mayor, when you've had a
• 11:29
  Speaker 5: business career, when you're sixty years old, think you're necessary you.
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: Know, Oh yeah, absolutely so.
• 11:37
  Speaker 5: Now I didn't have that good a situation with a
• 11:39
  Speaker 5: few of his wife that has passed with her friends.
• 11:43
  Speaker 5: In fact, at the wedding, one of her best friends
• 11:46
  Speaker 5: walked up to me and said, why are you smiling?
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: I'm getting Wow.
• 11:53
  Speaker 5: Yeah, it was pretty low and I said you should
• 11:57
  Speaker 5: try it sometime.
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: I love that. I appreciate that. Well, I do actually
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: have a question, Donna.
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: I was.
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: Very surprised as I was reading your book as somebody
• 12:09
  Speaker 3: who's you know, getting married for the first time, and
• 12:12
  Speaker 3: maybe you'd have you know, a ward or two for
• 12:14
  Speaker 3: a young you know, bride to.
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: Be so so that you are the only wife, so
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: that I'm ready.
• 12:19
  Speaker 3: So that once the fairy tale ends. No, but just
• 12:23
  Speaker 3: to kind of know what to expect. I mean, I'm excited,
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: but I know that there's you know, not everything that
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: that that shines is gold. So we'd love to kind
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: of hear what your thoughts are and if you have
• 12:35
  Speaker 3: any advice for me.
• 12:36
  Speaker 5: Well for the first wife and hopefully the last wife.
• 12:39
  Speaker 5: You can be the first and the last hopefully, and
• 12:41
  Speaker 5: that's isn't it what we all hope for? And that's
• 12:44
  Speaker 5: where yeah, that's what we all want. And so that's
• 12:47
  Speaker 5: why I titled the book Cinderella has sell You a Lie.
• 12:50
  Speaker 5: And I really struggled with that title. And what that
• 12:54
  Speaker 5: title really says, I think is that we really don't
• 12:57
  Speaker 5: we all want to be Cinderella. I know you, Duka
• 13:00
  Speaker 5: stands with your marriage and your wedding coming up, and
• 13:03
  Speaker 5: we all feel a little bit of like Cinderella. Unfortunately
• 13:07
  Speaker 5: on the honeymoon sometimes he does see our cellulite, so
• 13:10
  Speaker 5: it's not as it's not all perfect, and that's that's
• 13:13
  Speaker 5: why I wrote it that way. So you're going to
• 13:15
  Speaker 5: have those ups and downs just like the second wife.
• 13:17
  Speaker 5: They just may not be as far down and as
• 13:20
  Speaker 5: far up.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: Maybe I'll take it, I'll do you go, Yeah you can.
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: I think he'll be the only wife. Now, whether he'll
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: be the only husband, I don't know. I'm not talking
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: about yes, well good to that. That'll be the next
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: to the next uge, the next subject. So speaking of
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: the second wife, but what point in your do you advise,
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: like how many say you're about to be the third
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: wife or the fourth wife. Is there a number that
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: we should say? You know, you might want to step
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: back on that one.
• 13:54
  Speaker 5: Now is are you asking me if the man's step
• 13:57
  Speaker 5: back or the woman?
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: Well, how many can you have the woman? Should the woman?
• 14:01
  Speaker 5: Yeah?
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: Should the woman? Should you become his third wife? Is
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: that our fourth wife or fifth wife?
• 14:08
  Speaker 5: That's a really good question, Monica, And I think it
• 14:10
  Speaker 5: depends on the man. Uh. You know, if the man
• 14:13
  Speaker 5: has had a series of short term relationships, uh, probably
• 14:17
  Speaker 5: buy or beware. But you know, if he's had a
• 14:20
  Speaker 5: couple of wives and he's been married several years to
• 14:22
  Speaker 5: show a commitment and maybe one of them has passed,
• 14:25
  Speaker 5: or maybe both of them have that you really need
• 14:28
  Speaker 5: to look at the background. I think it's really important
• 14:31
  Speaker 5: to take time to look at the background of each one,
• 14:34
  Speaker 5: the wife and the husband, and see what the circumstances are.
• 14:37
  Speaker 5: So there's no magic.
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah. That leads me to another book that you've written
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: about serial killers who fall in love. So you're looking
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: at the background of the previous wives. If they all died,
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: then maybe you should say hmm, so, but you have
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: written that. So you wrote all these humor books which
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: are hilarious. I mean this one I highly recomm it's hilarious.
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: Oh, I've already told the friend to you wrote.
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: A book about Henry Lee Lucas, And I mean i'd
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: tell us a little bit about a book about two
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: I guess two serial killers falling in love for getting together.
• 15:14
  Speaker 5: Yeah, actually a policewoman and a serial killer.
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: Before that.
• 15:19
  Speaker 5: I do want to mention the other two humor books
• 15:21
  Speaker 5: because they do play off of Cinderella, and then I'll
• 15:24
  Speaker 5: mention absolutely to Twisted, my second book, which when I
• 15:28
  Speaker 5: wrote Cinderella, people really wanted to follow up, and so
• 15:31
  Speaker 5: instead stands of me going younger for Cinderella, I decided
• 15:36
  Speaker 5: to go older and I was on a cruise ship
• 15:39
  Speaker 5: and when the idea came to me, and I was
• 15:41
  Speaker 5: watching an older woman probably at that time in her
• 15:44
  Speaker 5: seventies late seventies, hit on a younger man and I
• 15:48
  Speaker 5: could see it from where I was in the library
• 15:51
  Speaker 5: of a cruise ship. And so that led me to
• 15:53
  Speaker 5: write Sex and the Siren. And Sex and the Siren
• 15:57
  Speaker 5: became a really hot sellar because the word said was
• 16:00
  Speaker 5: in it, so you never know what's going to happen.
• 16:03
  Speaker 5: My third books called Musings to Milania, Our Dear Milania,
• 16:07
  Speaker 5: and I wrote that for Milania Trump to keep her
• 16:11
  Speaker 5: man true to her. It's a humor book. So that's
• 16:15
  Speaker 5: my three humor books. But now I'm going to Twisted Retribution.
• 16:18
  Speaker 5: Twisted Retribution is this book, and it is about a
• 16:23
  Speaker 5: serial killer. It's a true story and is being made
• 16:26
  Speaker 5: into a film right now. In fact, I have a
• 16:28
  Speaker 5: call into the Canada shortly to Canada the film commission
• 16:34
  Speaker 5: that is talking about doing the book. And it's about
• 16:37
  Speaker 5: a true story about Henry Lee Lucas, who was a
• 16:39
  Speaker 5: serial killer born in Ohio, and he is called the
• 16:44
  Speaker 5: serial Confessor because he confessed to five hundred crimes. But
• 16:48
  Speaker 5: he killed my mother's friend was one of his last crimes.
• 16:53
  Speaker 5: And so I wrote about Henry Lee Lucas in the
• 16:55
  Speaker 5: small town of Nacona, Texas, which is where I'm from.
• 16:59
  Speaker 5: Nakona boots that kind of thing, a very western town,
• 17:02
  Speaker 5: and I needed to get it out of my head.
• 17:06
  Speaker 5: It had been in my head forty years. He did
• 17:08
  Speaker 5: that in the very late seventies early eighties.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: Wow, So is that what prompted you to want to
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: write about that? Because to go from humor to that
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: subject that seems like a I mean, it shows what
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: a great author. You are because you have great range.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: I've written, and I mostly write funny things. So that
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: was what prompted you to do it? Is you just
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: had always thought about that situation and wanted to talk
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: about it.
• 17:35
  Speaker 5: I really wanted for all those years. Anytime I would
• 17:38
  Speaker 5: see a serial killer on TV or read about a
• 17:42
  Speaker 5: serial killer, Henry Lee Lucas would come back to me
• 17:45
  Speaker 5: and how he killed Missus Rich and how tragic and
• 17:51
  Speaker 5: traumatizing it was for that small community of three thousand
• 17:55
  Speaker 5: people and to my mother and everyone else. He was
• 17:58
  Speaker 5: caught several years later and he died in the Texas prison.
• 18:03
  Speaker 5: But I needed to get that out of my head,
• 18:05
  Speaker 5: and so that's why I decided to write it. I
• 18:08
  Speaker 5: never dreamed it would become a bestseller. I never dreamed
• 18:11
  Speaker 5: it would go to film. It was not even in
• 18:14
  Speaker 5: my psyche.
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: How does that feel now that you're looking at it
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: becoming a film? I mean, how much I know when
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: they translate things to film, some of the things that
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: you might have put in the book or your vision
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: of it isn't being translated into the art. Are you
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: going to be working with a screenwriter too, or how
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: is that going to like how much of your book
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: is going to be in that final product?
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: Do you think that's a good question.
• 18:35
  Speaker 5: The script, the script has been written and has been
• 18:39
  Speaker 5: sent out. It's pretty much all over to different film
• 18:43
  Speaker 5: companies right now, and we're getting a lot of feedback,
• 18:45
  Speaker 5: and it's good feedback. I promised myself because I had
• 18:50
  Speaker 5: read several things about meddlesome authors and meddle some writers
• 18:55
  Speaker 5: who sometimes would ruin a script because they took it
• 18:59
  Speaker 5: so personal. And I promised the film uh the screen
• 19:03
  Speaker 5: screenwriter in the film company, that I would not do that.
• 19:06
  Speaker 5: He did. They did kill off one of my characters
• 19:09
  Speaker 5: that I really wanted to take on. And I have
• 19:11
  Speaker 5: a three book series. I've just finished the second book
• 19:15
  Speaker 5: that's the follow up to Twisted Retribution, and it's right
• 19:18
  Speaker 5: now being printed, and I really wanted to use that
• 19:21
  Speaker 5: character again, but they insisted on killing him off, so
• 19:24
  Speaker 5: I didn't write him in the second book. So I'm
• 19:26
  Speaker 5: trying to stay out of it pretty much. It's not
• 19:29
  Speaker 5: it's not my uh my Baileywick.
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, it's exciting though, to go through the process
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: of seeing it become a film. I mean, that's that's
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: got to be a fun process.
• 19:40
  Speaker 5: Well, my first book, Cinderella has Cellula. I had two
• 19:42
  Speaker 5: scripts written in Hollywood, one with Sundance Films, and then
• 19:48
  Speaker 5: another scriptwriting team wrote it and it was so different
• 19:51
  Speaker 5: it was shocking to me. So I was kind of
• 19:53
  Speaker 5: prepared for this.
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that does happen. I wrote a book called Comeback
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: Moms with a woman who is a former Wall Street
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: Journal reporter but she's also a novelist, and she wrote
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: a book called The Dallas Women's Guide to Gold Digging
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: with Pride that Show Time bought, but they never produced
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: it as the movie. So yeah, it. You know, it's
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: exciting when it does become a film because that's a
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: huge process to actually see it through to the end
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: of that.
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: Absolutely.
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: So you were also the mayor of Collieville, and I
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: was in politics briefly, and I won't go into all
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: of that, but I will say that the one thing
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: that they advised you is if you're going to run
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: for office, the one office you do not want is
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: mayor because it's the most personal two people, and it's
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: the hardest to jump off from. Like you know, it's
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: hard to go from mayor to congress or governor or
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: whatever because so many people didn't get their trash picked
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: up or whatever the issue was what made you decide
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: to run for mayor of Collieville? And you were what
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: three terms or you were there for a while, so
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: it wasn't just.
• 20:58
  Speaker 5: Well, people kept asking me to run for mayor, and
• 21:01
  Speaker 5: I would consider it, and I would consider it, and
• 21:03
  Speaker 5: so finally one day I thought, you know, I'm either
• 21:06
  Speaker 5: going to tell them never ask me again, or I'm
• 21:08
  Speaker 5: going to run. And so I decided I would run,
• 21:10
  Speaker 5: and shockingly I won. And you're right about being the mayor.
• 21:15
  Speaker 5: It's a very fulfilling job because you really interact with
• 21:18
  Speaker 5: your citizens. We had about twenty five thousand people in
• 21:21
  Speaker 5: my town, and you interact with the citizens all of
• 21:23
  Speaker 5: the time. And one congressman told me what you just said.
• 21:27
  Speaker 5: She said, Oh, I would never run for mayor because
• 21:30
  Speaker 5: it's the hardest job. Because everybody thinks they can do it,
• 21:32
  Speaker 5: they just don't have time.
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: Right, That's the truth. Is a lot too.
• 21:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah, but I learned a tremendous amount and made so
• 21:40
  Speaker 5: many friends, and I'm so glad I did it. Looking back,
• 21:44
  Speaker 5: it really changed me in lots of ways.
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, these days you can do almost anything and run
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: for high aspire to a higher office. We've all learned.
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: You know, I've been on TikTok and all these social
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: media things. I've done the silliest things, a hop on
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: a hoppity hop, and I mean some things that I've
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: said my political career is totally over. I can never run.
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: But now that's not true. So do you have any
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: do you aspire? I mean, yesterday I went to vote,
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: and honestly, I hate I'm embarrassed to say, the twenty
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: five people running for Congress in this primary, and knew
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: none of them. I thought, why did not I throw
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: my hat in the ring?
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: Are you trying to tell us how you're gonna know?
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: I'm not running for Congress? But are you?
• 22:23
  Speaker 5: We'll stand behind you.
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So, Donna, what about you? I mean, you've got
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: to the political experience. You've you know, you're a successful writer,
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: You've got a fan base, like any any ambition to
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: the great country?
• 22:37
  Speaker 5: Not really, not really, you know, I really never have
• 22:42
  Speaker 5: had any great ambitions to do anything. I just kind
• 22:47
  Speaker 5: of do whatever I want to do at that time.
• 22:49
  Speaker 5: So who knows next year what I might do. I
• 22:51
  Speaker 5: don't know. I might keep writing, I might not. I've
• 22:54
  Speaker 5: always been that way.
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: That's a great let So yeah, I'm super impressed for
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: not having ambitions and being the successful.
• 23:01
  Speaker 5: That's a I just whatever I feel like doing at
• 23:03
  Speaker 5: the time.
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: You need to write a self help book. You need
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: to write a book, then.
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: People need a book on that. Like yes, for all
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: of you.
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: That think that you be ambitious and driven is the
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: way to go? A plan? Yeah, that's stupid. Do what
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: I did?
• 23:15
  Speaker 5: Plan though?
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, good for you. Well that is awesome. Well, we
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: have some women who would like to ask you some
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: questions as well, and they are our Zoomer moms. So
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: welcome zuber Moms. Welcome to the Mom's Club.
• 23:30
  Speaker 5: Hi everyone, ladies.
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: I am going to introduce each one of you. Say
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: you're tell us your name, where you're from, a little
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: bit about yourself, and do you have a question for Donna. First, Victoria,
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: welcome to the Mom's Club.
• 23:43
  Speaker 6: So my name is VICTORYA. Also, I live in Dallas, Texas.
• 23:47
  Speaker 6: I'm an executive assistant and I have four children and
• 23:51
  Speaker 6: a bonus son who lives in Austin. And when thinking
• 23:56
  Speaker 6: about the book, Donna, I was curious when you were writing,
• 24:00
  Speaker 6: Andderella has cellillit, what was your state of mind, your
• 24:03
  Speaker 6: psych like, what were you thinking?
• 24:05
  Speaker 5: What was my psyching? A frustration. I had been married
• 24:11
  Speaker 5: about a year and a half and moved into my
• 24:15
  Speaker 5: husband's house, which he had been living there for many years.
• 24:18
  Speaker 5: That was part of our deal. We made this deal
• 24:20
  Speaker 5: and he said, I really want you to live in
• 24:21
  Speaker 5: my house, and I said, okay. So I thought that
• 24:25
  Speaker 5: I would get to change it and it would look
• 24:27
  Speaker 5: like Donna's house, and that didn't happen. So that was
• 24:32
  Speaker 5: a big frustration for me. When you're sixty years old
• 24:36
  Speaker 5: and you have your house just like you like it,
• 24:38
  Speaker 5: and now you're all of a sudden uprooting and moving
• 24:40
  Speaker 5: somewhere else where another woman has lived for thirty years.
• 24:44
  Speaker 5: I was frustrated. As I said earlier, I was probably
• 24:50
  Speaker 5: somewhat surprised that that was a major issue for me,
• 24:55
  Speaker 5: and so I just started thinking about all of the
• 24:58
  Speaker 5: things that had happened in all those years of dating,
• 25:01
  Speaker 5: because we dated three years, and just started writing it
• 25:05
  Speaker 5: down and would laugh hysterically as I would write it
• 25:10
  Speaker 5: and sometimes cry. So that was my It was kind
• 25:13
  Speaker 5: of up and down.
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: That's the fun thing about when you write. My favorite
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: part about writing humor is when I read it myself
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: and I start laughing. Then I know that I have
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: really hit it big on that one.
• 25:24
  Speaker 3: I remember it's in Italy, actually running through some of
• 25:26
  Speaker 3: those lines. And as soon as she got a laugh
• 25:28
  Speaker 3: from me, and then she got a laugh from my
• 25:29
  Speaker 3: eleven year old, we knew it was a duntel.
• 25:31
  Speaker 5: Oh.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I test everything on everybody.
• 25:33
  Speaker 5: I sort of have a little writer's room, and it's
• 25:36
  Speaker 5: it's really two or three of my friends and I
• 25:39
  Speaker 5: read them each chapter and they're so kind to go
• 25:41
  Speaker 5: through it and laugh or not.
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: Well, they were lucky. I think it's really funny, so
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: I'm sure they got a treat there. I'd hate to
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: be the one that saw the book and was like
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: I had to laugh because she's my friend. But you
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: know that wasn't the bough. Cindy, Welcome to the Mom's Club.
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: Tell us a little bit about yourself, and do you
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: have a question for Donna.
• 26:00
  Speaker 5: Yes, thank you so much for having me.
• 26:02
  Speaker 4: And I'm Cindy and I've been married to my husband
• 26:06
  Speaker 4: for forty nine years and I'm a second wife my grandson.
• 26:11
  Speaker 4: I have a grandson who lives in Austin. He's got
• 26:14
  Speaker 4: a real job, so that's very exciting, right, So, Donna,
• 26:19
  Speaker 4: I want to know why you chose Cinderella.
• 26:24
  Speaker 5: Has Cellulite for the book title. You know, that's such
• 26:30
  Speaker 5: a good question, Cindy. Because I wrote the book without
• 26:33
  Speaker 5: a title. I could not decide on a title, and
• 26:37
  Speaker 5: so I wanted to call it shut Up and Wear Beige.
• 26:42
  Speaker 5: Told that I really wanted. And when I took the
• 26:46
  Speaker 5: book to my copyright lawyer, he said, have you looked
• 26:50
  Speaker 5: at this title? Do we know if it's ever been used?
• 26:53
  Speaker 5: And I said, I don't think so. Well, we found
• 26:56
  Speaker 5: a small club in Anchorage, Alaska of second wives called
• 27:00
  Speaker 5: shut Up and Wear Beige, and so my attorney was
• 27:04
  Speaker 5: pretty smart and he said, you know, you might sell
• 27:07
  Speaker 5: a few books, so it's probably good that you get
• 27:09
  Speaker 5: another title because you can be sued. And I said,
• 27:13
  Speaker 5: it's never going to sell anything. But so we went on.
• 27:17
  Speaker 5: We were getting ready to print the book, and I
• 27:19
  Speaker 5: was driving down the freeway one day thinking about this,
• 27:22
  Speaker 5: and I thought, you know, I thought I was kind
• 27:24
  Speaker 5: of like Cinderella, but I had all kinds of issues
• 27:27
  Speaker 5: like cell you like, and it just came to me
• 27:29
  Speaker 5: and that was it.
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: That's a great, great title. Thank you, Teres welcome to
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: the mom's Club. Tell us a little bit about yourself,
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: and do you have a question?
• 27:40
  Speaker 7: Okay, I do, Okay. So I am Teres and I
• 27:45
  Speaker 7: have been married to my husband, Chris for twenty eight years.
• 27:49
  Speaker 5: I am the first wife, okay. And we have two.
• 27:52
  Speaker 7: Daughters that are twenty eight and twenty five. And I
• 27:58
  Speaker 7: am a realtor I work for I've been a realtor
• 28:01
  Speaker 7: for sixteen years and really enjoy that. And I have
• 28:06
  Speaker 7: loved getting to know Donna. I met Donna through a charity,
• 28:10
  Speaker 7: which is Kidney Texas, and we were fast friends. And
• 28:15
  Speaker 7: then now she's got this wonderful books, Cinderella, as well
• 28:19
  Speaker 7: as her other books. So, but one question I wanted
• 28:22
  Speaker 7: to ask Donna was, Donna, what did your friends and
• 28:26
  Speaker 7: family think about this book?
• 28:30
  Speaker 5: That's a great question. I have been asked that question
• 28:33
  Speaker 5: a lot. In fact, my husband's friends were kind of,
• 28:36
  Speaker 5: I think, in a state of shock for a while.
• 28:40
  Speaker 5: There were some excuse me, some of my friends thought
• 28:44
  Speaker 5: it was really funny. My family, my boys. I have
• 28:48
  Speaker 5: two boys, and they're grown. They could have cared less
• 28:51
  Speaker 5: when we're the other They're used to mom doing all
• 28:53
  Speaker 5: kinds of crazy things and Herb's family, I think were
• 28:58
  Speaker 5: suspicious as to why I would write such a book,
• 29:02
  Speaker 5: but Herb took it. My my husband took it pretty well.
• 29:05
  Speaker 5: A lot of people said, oh, he may not like that,
• 29:07
  Speaker 5: and I said, I don't care. I'm being true to myself,
• 29:10
  Speaker 5: and so that was what I was interested in, was
• 29:12
  Speaker 5: being true to myself.
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, that's that's great. Yeah, And I wondered while
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: I was reading it, what your husband had to be
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: thinking about that, because I'm not sure my husband would
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: have taken me writing a book like that.
• 29:24
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: I also saw that there was a period of time
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: after you wrote that book where you went on some
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: shows and you were you were called a sexpert. Now
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: now they now, how did your husband and your kids, especially,
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: how did they take that and how did you segue
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: to something else.
• 29:42
  Speaker 5: They could care less? Yeah, I was called a sexpert
• 29:45
  Speaker 5: for a long time actually, and still do a few
• 29:48
  Speaker 5: speeches along that way. I've got one coming up. But
• 29:52
  Speaker 5: it was just something people decided to call me. I mean,
• 29:56
  Speaker 5: obviously I'm not. But I did have a lot of
• 29:59
  Speaker 5: talks with the day Apps. They were real interested in
• 30:02
  Speaker 5: getting me to talk with them. And at the time,
• 30:06
  Speaker 5: a store called Steinmart put me on, put me on
• 30:10
  Speaker 5: a trip. They sponsored me, They sponsored the book and
• 30:15
  Speaker 5: sent me to all the stein Marts all over the country,
• 30:17
  Speaker 5: and I had other sponsors. So it was really fun.
• 30:21
  Speaker 5: And if they wanted to call me a sex berth,
• 30:23
  Speaker 5: that was fine.
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: So when you were doing that, you would meet people
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: and talk about your book. And I mean like like,
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: did you have people come and ask you then questions
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: like they did they seek your advice about.
• 30:34
  Speaker 5: All the time? They still do.
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what's one of the funniest things you've ever been
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: asked to opine on?
• 30:40
  Speaker 5: And oh, I've been asked so many things like what's
• 30:43
  Speaker 5: the best color when you have? You know, when you
• 30:46
  Speaker 5: go to bed with your paramore the first time? You know,
• 30:49
  Speaker 5: should you wear red lace? Should you wear white lace?
• 30:52
  Speaker 5: And I always so I give them some advice. And
• 30:56
  Speaker 5: that is if it's, you know, the first date, it's
• 31:00
  Speaker 5: not going to make much difference.
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: Just buy what fits well. For those who don't have
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: not read it yet, I highly recommend Cinderella Has Cell
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: You Light. It is a fun, awesome book and all
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: your other books, check those out and where can they
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: find the book and where can they find you? Donna
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: Well the book.
• 31:18
  Speaker 5: You can. Of course, it's on Amazon. It's been on
• 31:22
  Speaker 5: Amazon for ten years. It's often in the top few
• 31:25
  Speaker 5: percentages of relationships and marital advice and that sort of thing.
• 31:30
  Speaker 5: So just look under Donna Arp Whitesman Books. It'll pull
• 31:33
  Speaker 5: up all my books. You can get it at Walmart,
• 31:36
  Speaker 5: you can get it at Target, you can order it
• 31:38
  Speaker 5: through any of the bookstores. A lot of the bookstores
• 31:40
  Speaker 5: carry it, so it's all around and my other books
• 31:45
  Speaker 5: as well, but Amazon's a really easy way to get it.
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: Pick up this book. You will absolutely you won't regret it.
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: You'll enjoy it thoroughly, particularly if you're the last wife.
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: You might specially get a lot out of it. And no,
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: the First Wife is not gonna well, yeah, there's a
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: lot to say about that.
• 32:04
  Speaker 3: I will say there was a lot of takeaway from it.
• 32:09
  Speaker 3: I mean I'm not the wife just yet, but.
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: There will take away well, I mean the First Wife
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: is really that was that movie The First Wives Club
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: and all that either in Taible, I have a friend
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: who she was spied upon by her husband's first wife's
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: and her friends, like she couldn't go anywhere without them
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: being hearing, Like at the school they would say, you
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: do realize that Maryland's friends are at the school too
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: and reporting back everything that you're doing. And I'm like,
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: oh my gosh, it's crazy. Yeah, so they do. So
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: this is a very informative, important instructional book. Gets a
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: humor book, but it also has a lot of truth
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: and people need to take a look at. So well,
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: thank you Donna so much for joining us today, and
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: thank you Zoomer Moms. We love our Zoomer moms and
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: I love that today they were all from Dallas, my hometown,
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: and ladies will all have to get together meet me
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: at Highland Park Village. I'm always there at me Casina.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: We'll have a margarita together. It'll be so much fun.
• 33:07
  Speaker 3: Where it comes to Miami or Miami Sunny Miami meeting.
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: Yes, we'll have a.
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: Meeting of the Mom's Club. We will definitely all get
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: together and do that. And speaking of that, we have
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: pop up events all over the country, so check us
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: out for one of our pop up events. They're super fun.
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: There have been several in Dallas, So if you've been
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: one of those, tell your friends and then bring more
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: the next time that we come to Dallas. And if
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: you would like to be a zoomer mom like the
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: ladies that were on the show today. Go to our
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: website inside Themom's Club dot com. There's a button you
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: can push and you can submit an application to be
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: a zooper mom and maybe you'll get to be on
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: the show as well and ask a question of one
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: of our guests. You can catch us on our social media.
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: As I mentioned, I do all kinds of crazy things
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: on social media. We're on Facebook, TikTok, YouTube, Instagram, We're
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: all over the place. Definitely check us out at Inside
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: the Mom's Club up. I cannot believe these times go
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: by so fast. Constans, thanks so much for joining me
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: in a day. We hope to be a great support
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: to you in your marriage, in your first and only marriage,
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: and as a millennial mom. You got a lot on
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: your plate. L dear, We'll help you there for you. Yes,
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: I'll make it well and you and I will go
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: have a marguerite ourselves after this is our Do you
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: know our motto? We have a very important motto on
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: this show. It goes like this. If you don't laugh, sometimes, ladies,
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: you are going to cry. So you don't want to cry, right,
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: I don't think. Let's keep on laughing out there, ladies.
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: We'll see you next time inside the mom's lab.