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S4 E37 - Corruption: The Musical! · The Steve & Jeff Show

• 0:14
  SPEAKER_10: On whatever podcast platform you like to go.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_10: So stay hello.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_10: Comedy's Master Jeff.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_10: Cook enough trouble making beautiful mess.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_10: Lap your ears and bring your lap track breath.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_10: And now here's Stephen Jeff.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_01: Well, hey, thanks for singing us into the show, Steve and Jeff Show Band.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_01: And I tell you what, listeners, if your bingo card for today has ceasefire broken again, you're a winner.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_01: Hey, how's it going, Jeff?
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I I was just thinking how good it feels to be healthy as I look around and see like my wife who had surgery.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_02: Your wife had surgery, right?
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, she had surgery too.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_02: No, what's up with Kathy?
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_02: Well, she had a tooth pulled, but it was really hard on me because she's in all this pain, but I have to act like I care.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_02: Kind of reminds me when she went into labor.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_02: It was the same thing.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_01: You know, and I Jeff, I feel your pain because pretending is so hard.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, and by the way, what happened with Kathy?
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_02: Well, actually, she didn't lose her sense of humor, although I don't know if she did this on purpose.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_02: But so they pull the tooth and I take her home, and she's got this big gauze in her mouth.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_02: And for the next hour, she can't drink or eat anything.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_02: You know, she's obviously suffering.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_02: She got out right before lunch.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, come on, you know, yeah, exactly.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, come on, right, you know, however, and it was hard enough they told me don't let her fall asleep because she's got the gauze in her mouth, so I had to keep hitting her every time she started to doze off.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_02: So those doctor's orders, I write and so then she she turns to me and she goes, I am so thirsty.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm like, Yeah, well, you know, in 45 minutes you can have something to drink.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_02: And she says, No, I'm so thirsty.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_02: She said, I have a really bad case of cotton mouth.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_02: And I looked at her and I thought, that's fucking hilarious.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_02: I I started laughing.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_02: I said, You literally have cotton mouth.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_01: Well, she's she's coming out of the anesthetic.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_01: I guess she's coming back to readers, there's cotton in my mouth.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_02: Wait, yeah, I thought that was hilarious.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_02: But I I'm not sure she really did that on purpose.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_02: So, anyways, well, what about you?
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_01: What's been going on with you?
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_01: Last week, Teresa and I went to New York City.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, we went to see a Broadway play.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: We actually actually saw a couple of Broadway plays.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_01: You know, we've been meaning to do that for a long time and finally had the opportunity.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_01: And one of the plays we saw, believe it or not, my nephew had a small role in it.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it's just one line.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_01: Just one line, but hey, it's Broadway, right?
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, you know, one line on Broadway, that's that's still pretty cool, you know.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_01: And we got to see opening night.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_01: Opening night of that.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_01: Now, unfortunately, he got fired right after the performance.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, wh why why did he get fired?
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_01: Well, it turns out Johnny, of course, as you know, and everyone's saying Johnny, Johnny, no, he he really is a good actor, but he just has trouble memorizing lines.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_01: You know, I just I I really it's too bad silent movies aren't still a thing.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, he could be great.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_01: He could be really big in those.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_01: But you know, for this role, he just had that one line.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, the director told Johnny that when he got his cue, he should take a rose onto the stage and put it up close to your nose with your thumb and index and middle fingers, and just take a big sniff and say, Oh, the smell of my lover.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_01: That was his that was his line, right?
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_01: That sounds so easy.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_01: Well, yeah, yeah.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, walk out, do that, walk off.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_01: Uh that was that was it.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_01: But you know, it's Broadway.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_01: So I mean pretty cool, right?
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_01: So so it came time for him to say his line.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_01: Goes on stage, says, Oh, the smell of my lover, you know, gives his line.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_01: The crowd roars with laughter.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_01: You know, and and I I thought it was pretty funny too, even though actually the play he was in was Schindler's list of musical.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_01: So there's a lot of laughing.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_01: There was some.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_01: Not a lot.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: You know, uh the director was not laughing though, not laughing at all.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_01: After the play, you know, Johnny went up to the director and asked, Hey, did I screw up the line?
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_01: Director said, No, you got the line right, but you forgot the flower.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_01: So the good news is there's a there's a bright side to this.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_01: After after the play, you know, we went backstage and met with Johnny and he introduced us to another director who was there just you know for the opening night as a director that Johnny knew from acting school.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_01: And she is actually the director of a big hit on Broadway, big hit, called Corruption the Musical.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_01: Now that's the other play we saw.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, Jeff, this show.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_01: This show is the Toast of Broadway.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's the biggest it was the biggest hit at the Tony's, and one of the few new original shows out there.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_01: You know, these days it seems like everything on Broadway is a revival or a musical version of an older work.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, like the new show we couldn't get tickets to.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_01: We wanted to see a third show, but we couldn't get tickets.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_01: It's a musical version of Moby Dick.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_01: It's called Dick with an exclamation point.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_01: Uh and what do you want to bet?
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_01: They'll add music to that Death of a Salesman revival?
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_01: You know, Nathan Lane could still play it, right?
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_01: He could be in that version too.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_01: Boy, I digress here.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_01: Uh this show, Corruption in the Musical, really walked off with most of the Tonies.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, it beat ragtime, it beat Schmigadune.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_01: It was written, directed, and stars.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_01: The very talented Barbara Bell.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_01: Now we've we've mentioned her before.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_01: We've heard of her.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_01: I've heard of her, yeah.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_01: And in fact, we played a hit song from this show called Bye Bye Bondi.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, uh Jeff, before we bring her on, I think maybe just to give the listeners a little reminder and show a little bit of her talent, let's play a little excerpt from that song, Bye Bye Bondi, before we introduce her.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_01: I love it.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_01: It's one of my favorite songs.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_03: Bye bye Bondy, our sorrow's minimal.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_03: Here's why Bondy, you're a criminal.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_03: Bye bye Bondi, you pedophile guard.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_03: We hope Bundy that you get displayed.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_03: You used up every chance.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_03: And if you go to jail, the world will stop.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_03: You're an embarrassment that's no fun date.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_03: So the president does the president get lost.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_01: And Jeff, yeah, she's agreed to come on the show tonight.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_01: She is just the other side of that glass.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_02: Wow, I can't wait.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I'm such a celebrity hound, and maybe she's got like free tickets for me or you know, hotel room, airfare, you know, that kind of stuff.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_01: You know, just little stuff.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_01: Hey, we could ask.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_01: Anyway, here she is, Barbara Bell.
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome to the Stephen Jeff Show, Barbara.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_01: Hi, Barbara.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for having me.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, it's so great to be here and get a chance to talk to the millions of subscribers who listen to your show every week.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_02: Oh my god, it's our pleasure.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_02: And I those millions, they're gonna be coming to this play, I'm sure.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, absolutely.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, this place's gonna run for five years easy.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_02: And I and I can't believe that we are lucky enough to have you in the studio.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_02: And yet I I don't mean to I don't want to offend you or anything, but you look really young.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_02: How did you end up to be the the the head of a hit Broadway play?
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, you know, uh 90% of life is just showing up.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: And so in my little town, I I just started by uh we're 12 years old working the box office of the local the local theater, and before you know it, I'm running the spotlight that I'm a prop mistress.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: And here we are, a director.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: I I'm no I'm no uh talented prima donna, but I I'm just a warm body that just keeps showing up on time.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_01: Wow, that is impressive, and I think very important because a lot of people don't show up and and don't have the success that you've had.
• 8:34
  SPEAKER_01: Now I gotta ask Barbara, how did you come up with the idea to do a play on the White House and all of its you know, characters?
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_00: That was really by chance as well.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: I was out in my neighborhood on Starbucks where they were conducting an ice raid out per huge, and I I ran into someone from the uh Heritage Foundation, which promotes you know, the American raid.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: What's more American than a Broadway play?
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_00: And they told me about Project 2025 and how it was to they want to get real Americans back into the art.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: Movies, music, plays, and one thing led to another, and I ended up getting commissioned to, you know, write it, direct it, act in it.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_02: I know the Heritage Foundation has deep pockets.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_02: Steve and I have deep pockets too, but you know, for other reasons.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_01: But I have really short arms, so yeah.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_02: But did did they so they funded the whole thing?
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_02: They paid for the the whole the whole play?
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_00: Half.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_00: And the other half actually came from the White House.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: They had some extra money they could funnel over to me from uh cutting off Head Start and food stamps and all.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_00: It just all sort of uh worked out.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_01: We are gonna play some excerpts from the musical.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_01: But Barbara, did they come up with the name Corruption the Musical, or did you come up with that name?
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, I did.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_00: I the working title they presented to me was MAGA the musical, but by the time I got done with it, I changed the name to make it fit the storyline a bit better.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: Although MAGA people should be proud because they have plenty of corruption as well.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_02: And probably more from from what we're finding out.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_02: And just so people can get tickets and are you're at the Virginia Theater, is that right on Broadway?
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_00: Actually, it has been renamed the Trump Theater.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_00: The original name was the Orpheum, how cliche, but then the White House bought it, and uh they renamed it after a a young girl, uh Virginia, this uh pageant contestant that the king took under his wing many years ago.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_00: And then finally, after they were forced to change the Kennedy Center back to uh well, the Kennedy Center, they named this place uh the Trump Theater.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_01: You know, I was wondering why that tarp was covering the entrance.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_01: We could really couldn't find the door at first, but but I again I digress.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_01: With your shall we say, realistic view of the administration, uh is the king upset with the show?
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no, no, quite quite the opposite.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_00: He loves it, sold out shows every night, making him lots of money.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sure he got his uh original investment back times ten, I would guess, if he had to pay for it himself.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_00: Which I'd be surprised if he did.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that sounds amazing.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that still felt like him.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_02: No, no, not at all.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_02: Now, if I understand correctly, you wrote Corruption the Musical, and you produced it and you directed it, and you starred in it as well, is that right?
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_00: Um starring in it, you know, starring it is a strong choice of words.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, would you say that Antonio Banderas is the star of Evita playing Che Guevara?
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: No, I mean I I'm more of a Greek chorus, if you will.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_01: That still takes a lot of talent, and I it seems like you're almost as talented as the king.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, I bet and certainly at 6'3 and 215 pounds, I bet he could tread the boards and sing in a Broadway musical too.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_01: Uh yeah, uh we're gonna play the clips, we're gonna get to them, but uh before we do that, what role do you play in in Corruption the Musical?
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: I I play Caroline Love It.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: She is sort of the narrator of the play, telling the story of what the White House really means when they lie and steal and destroy our government and country.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_00: It's a fun role to play.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: Really taps into my creativity and imagination.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_01: I bet.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_01: Now, this first clip is early in the show, and this song kind of starts the storyline.
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_01: Is that correct?
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, that's right.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_00: It's a duet between myself and uh Russell Wat from the Heritage Foundation called Dear Old Heritage.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_08: Heritage was a think tank, and it was just okay.
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_08: The problem was our think stank, so we found a better way.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_08: Let's stay jacu.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_08: Let's stay jacuzzi.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_08: How's it sound to you?
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_08: Let's stay jacuzzi.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_08: Let's write a thousand pages about how we seize power.
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_08: Nobody will believe us.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_08: So this is our fine hour.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_08: We'll tell out how you have no rights and crystal fascist child.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_08: We'll build a country just for whites.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_08: Project 2025.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_08: Let's stay to cool, let's stay to couple.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_03: Why am I asking you?
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_03: Let's stay a cool.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_02: Beautiful.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_02: God.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_02: Did I read somewhere where you originally had the role of Pam Bondi, which were also is a meaty role, too?
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_02: Is that true?
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_02: What is what's the story with that?
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, that's true.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_00: But uh, you know, she got fired.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I mean, she got moved to a more important position.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: So I I switched to Caroline.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_00: The adding of subtracting the it of characters in this play is pretty common due to, you know, the firings, the transfers, the resignations, and uh the uh the suicides, of course.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, speaking of suicides, uh is it true that you might star in a spin-off called Redacted the Musical?
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_00: Who knows?
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_00: But I think that is more of a movie idea that would star Melania.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_00: She is the movie star in the King's family and intimately committed to the story.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_01: You know, speaking of her, I read that some songs were cut from the show in the interest of time.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, you know, you write more than you can really use.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, one of those uh was sung by Melanoma, I mean Melania.
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_01: And I've heard that the title of that song was Butt Stuff Costs Extra.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_01: Is that is that true?
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I can't really comment.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_00: They made me sign a lot of MDAs.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I bet, yeah.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_02: You just can't get enough Melania.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_02: So I'm sure we've all seen the movie.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_02: Uh what is that called when you win uh an award for best movie, best play, best musical, best song, best first lady.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_02: It's called the FIFO Award.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_02: Is that what it's called?
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_02: So but I'd like to see that for sure.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_02: The second clip, I've been looking forward to this second one because it's from uh cash patel.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_02: Is that right?
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_02: Or should I say crypto patel?
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know what he goes by these days, but I think it was cash.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_02: Is that right?
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, it is.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_00: Side note originally his role was offered to uh Scott Beer, but it didn't work out when we found out in rehearsals that he he doesn't really know how to sing or act.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, one episode of Joni Loves Chachi could have told you that, but again, I digress.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_01: Let's hear that cash texture.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_10: He's drunk again, he's dumb cross, he's drunk again, got stop, stop.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_02: Again, everything is so first class.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_02: I'm I'm so impressed.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_02: He's a lot more than what people accused him of buying wine coolers for sorority girls, you know, getting drunk and that kind of stuff.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_01: So Yeah, what a great song that was, too.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_01: Uh now this next clip is about one of my favorite characters in the White House.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_01: He's just he's just so much fun.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_01: Kind of a newcomer in some ways, a fast rising star.
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_01: Mark Wayne Mullen is the new head of Homeland Security, of course.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_01: It's one of those songs, yeah, you know, like in the old Broadway days, they say, Oh, you walked out of the theater singing the song.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_01: This is one of those songs that you walk out of the theater humming to yourself.
• 17:45
  SPEAKER_01: I let's let's let's just check it out.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_01: I'm a plumber and my lack of knowledge may be numbing.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_09: Turns out that governance is quite a lot like plumbing.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_09: I shove the crap right in, I spray the crap right out, I jump more crap right in and I shake it all about.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_09: It's called obstructing justice and I'll stay without a doubt.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_09: That's what it's all about.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_09: Now stick it with me, kids.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_09: I jump the crap right in, I spray the crap right out, I jump more crap right in, and I shake it all about.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_09: It's called obstructing justice and I'll stay without a doubt.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_09: That's what it's all about.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_09: Yes, my king! That's what it's all about.
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_01: That must have been a challenge to write that song so quickly before opening night, since you know you probably had songs set up for Christy Noam before she was let do, right?
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, another last-minute substitute.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_00: It was a tough decision, but in the end, the uh crazy volatile de Nero type temper of Mullin really adds to the show.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_00: Although Christy is truly the poster child for corruption, she's the best at that, and she will be missed.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_00: The good news is Ms.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_00: Christie is actually in the play, in the chorus line in the finale.
• 19:15
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, she's outstanding.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_02: This I'm just getting off subject here, but this uh Mark Wayne, is that all one word?
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_02: Mark Wayne.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_02: I believe so.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_02: Is that right?
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_02: It's just it reminds me of all those mass murders.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_02: Isn't isn't that a thing where like they all had middle names?
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_01: Like yeah, well, and you know, you know, the funny I've always wondered about that too, because most people have middle names, but it seems like only the mass murders get referred to by the middle by all three names, you know.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_02: He's not anything like that, you know, except for his temple.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_02: But yeah, maybe uh anyways, we should probably move on before we get arrested.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_02: But um but so what's what do you have next?
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_00: Well, like most plays, Act Two really ramps up the story, and corruption the musical is no different.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_00: And our our next clip is starring the man who might be our next president or maybe Pope.
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_00: It's none other than JD Vance.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_01: So I remember the song too.
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_01: This is great in the in the musical.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_01: Uh it's called Number Two, and I think I think number two really describes JD pretty well.
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_01: So let's let's let's give it a listen.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_05: You may think you know me, but take a closer look.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_05: Peter T longs me and I got famous with a book.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_05: I stand for nothing.
• 20:46
  SPEAKER_05: Well, I stand for nothing.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_05: I don't know.
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_05: Like in the diapers on our king.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_05: If you can advance me, I'll believe anything.
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_02: That's great.
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_02: Wasn't he in that movie The Sofa?
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_02: At one point.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_02: I thought I thought he was in that.
• 21:30
  SPEAKER_02: That was X-rated.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_01: Well that was the sequel, that was a sequel to the piano.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_01: Because they're kind of moving, they were moving around the living room, you know.
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_01: Piano, the sofa.
• 21:39
  SPEAKER_01: They were gonna make they were gonna make the hutch, but you know, it was nobody got that.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_01: So I but yeah, but yeah, no, that was X-rated, yeah.
• 21:48
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, the X-rated sequel to a non-X-rated piano, yes.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I'm such a gossiper.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_02: Barbara, is there any backstory to JD?
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_02: Because he's he seems like the kind of person that you never know in.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_02: Exactly what he's thinking.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_00: Well, he did tour the backstage a bit, uh, and he we did catch him a few times uh going into the makeup section in the eyeliner and testing the eyeliners.
• 22:16
  SPEAKER_00: Uh but you know, I really thought he would uh volunteer more, you know, help us with set design, maybe stress test the furniture, but ultimately he's the one who ha in the White House who hasn't seen our show.
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_00: But I guess that's understandable since he's, you know, negotiating a peace agreement with uh a country that's already lost to us.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I'll tell you, he is the pro at making things up.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_01: Now, how how many Iran deals has he made up?
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, my gosh, oh next clip's a little different.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_01: Kind of a change in tone.
• 22:50
  SPEAKER_01: It's sung by uh Stephen Miller's character.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_01: Is there any story behind that?
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_00: Well, this was the only song that I got any pushback on.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_00: And it came from uh Stephen Miller himself.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_00: He wanted uh springtime for Hitler from the producers, but it really didn't fit in with the plague.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_00: But before he agreed to let it go, I almost took him out of the plague, which would have been a shame because you know he's probably the most corrupt and evil of all and truly belongs in the play.
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm very proud of this one, and uh if you hear any kind of uh similarity to Horst Vassaline, uh that that was purely intentional.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_01: Ah, okay.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_01: Well, and and you know, if he had tried to use Springtime for Hitler, I'm sure there's copyrights and things, and you know, that might be a a violation of the law, and he you know, like like I always say, you can't spell criminal without Miller.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_01: Wait, wait.
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_01: Anyway, let's let's listen to the song.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_07: I will the flag and talk like a wolf.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_07: I hate y'all and can't deport enough.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_07: The problem is I'm just a dismal weenie, but unlike you, the king put me in charge.
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_02: Another good choice.
• 24:13
  SPEAKER_02: It's like song after song.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_02: You know how when you see a play, and by the time you get near the end, it everything seems so familiar to you.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_02: And Stephen Miller reminds me of a lot of documentaries I've watched.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_02: Were they the marching, the marching stuff?
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_02: So are we near the end?
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_00: I do have one more clip.
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, excellent.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_00: Come work for us.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_00: It says so much since we almost didn't finish the play because no one wanted to be a part of it, but we found a way to uh how do you say get her done?
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_02: I'd love to hear it.
• 24:55
  unknown: If you can fight up with hate, we can be fair.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_03: If you are fired up with hate, we can be friends.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_03: We can set you up with hate that never ends.
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_03: He's a man with fucking addictions.
• 25:16
  SPEAKER_03: He's a man who likes to go, he brings up the victim, it comes and goes, comes and go, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, you don't want to ever get you'll stay joined.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_03: But if you do go to work, you'll be fired.
• 26:03
  SPEAKER_03: Don't know what the lad dog.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_03: You're who we want, that's what we want.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_03: Embarrassment.
• 26:11
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_01: That's another one you walk out of the theater singing, and I bet this administration does need creative ways to recruit.
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, yeah, after all, they lost all those FBI agents, those U.S.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_01: attorneys, and all the rest of the people.
• 26:24
  SPEAKER_01: Uh you know, this play is really a long and winy road describing the dichotomy someone feels when they're always an abuser and also always a victim.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_01: It's really a stunning exploration of Cartesian mind-body-substance dualism in musical form.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, not to go all intellectual on you, but anyway, so assuming our king will eventually leave the White House, what will your next project be besides, you know, that Epstein thing?
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm not sure really.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_00: I am writing another screenplay with a working title of Incarcerated to the Musical.
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_00: But I suppose that title could change to pardoning the musical.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_00: I guess we'll see.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I can't wait to find out.
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_02: This has been so amazing.
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_02: Uh you know, and Barbara, I just can't thank you enough for being on the show.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm looking forward to coming seeing the play as soon as I get tickets, you know, for like the play and hotel room, hotel and airfare and all that stuff.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_02: But I'm I'm gonna be seeing it right away after I get all that stuff.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_01: So I let me just encourage everyone to go see this play.
• 27:35
  SPEAKER_01: It is entertaining, and it's you know how a lot of musicals some people have problems relating to musicals because they don't seem realistic.
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_01: You know, people just burst into song and everybody knows the dance steps.
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_01: It's just that they don't they don't seem very realistic.
• 27:48
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I tell you, this one is really rooted in realism.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_01: So this is one of the most realistic musicals I've ever seen.
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_01: So congratulations, Barbara.
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_01: This is just a wonderful show, and I'm sure you've got many more Broadway hits in you.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, gentlemen.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_00: It's been a pleasure.
• 28:05
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, Steve and Jeff Show band.
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_01: Now you got it's a tall order, but maybe can you sing us out with something maybe almost as good as what we just heard?
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_01: This has been a big Broadway production in association with Big Brother Media.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_06: Read all about our hosts at stevanjeff.com.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_06: And now, here's one of those songs that got left out of the show, sung by our very own musical Supreme Court.
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_04: Well, it ain't grift, it's just a gift.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_04: It ain't grift, it's just a gift.
• 28:37
  SPEAKER_04: Tip starts well and they pay us well.
• 28:40
  SPEAKER_06: And it's all illegal if we say it is.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_06: We put the case above the law, slash the constitution with a chainsaw.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_08: But it ain't grift, it's just a gift.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_04: It ain't grift, it's just uh