Latest / Limitless Living with Fredricka Davis / 056: 5 Simple Evening Habits That Help You Sleep Better

Transcript

056: 5 Simple Evening Habits That Help You Sleep Better · Limitless Living with Fredricka Davis

• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: Hello and welcome back to the Wellness Reset Thursday episode of the Limitless Living Podcast.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Frederica Davis, creator of the Limitless Reset Method, and this is where I help you stop pushing through exhaustion and start creating realistic, sustainable health that actually fits into your life.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: This is not about perfectionism.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: This is about feeling great.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_00: Last week we talked on our Thursday episode about how you begin your day, drinking water before coffee and moving your body for five minutes, eating protein earlier, and taking intentional pauses to what your body actually needs.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: Today I want to pivot and talk about the other end of the day.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: Because here's something that I have realized over the years, both personally and after working with thousands of people for literally nearly 40 years, is that how you end your day often determines how you begin the next day.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_00: Most of us spend our entire day moving from one responsibility to another.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_00: That could be emails or running errands or taking care of the kids or clients or family, solving all the problems and making all the decisions.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: Then, somewhere around bedtime, we brush our teeth, we put our pajamas on, crawl into bed, and we expect our brains to suddenly decide to let it all go, shut down quietly, calmly, quickly, and go to sleep.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't usually work that way.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: Our bodies need a transition.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: That becomes extra important too when you start to have hormonal changes.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: And our nervous systems need a signal that the day is actually ending.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: Sleep doesn't really begin when your head hits the pillow.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_00: It actually begins an hour, maybe even two hours before that last moment where you go to bed.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: Now, before we go any further, let me say this.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: This is not about perfectionism, and it's not about creating another complicated evening routine.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: I promise I'm not asking you to spend 90 minutes doing your skincare, journaling, stretching, meditation, supplements, reading, tea, gratitude.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know, it's 17 other things that you saw on social media.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not asking you that.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, that doesn't work for most people long term.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: Now, that said, if you have a really good routine, I have a pretty good routine myself in place.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_00: It has a number of things in it.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_00: Outstanding, keep it up.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: But that's not what I'm talking about today.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_00: What I'm talking about is starting to bring in those simple habits, things that you can realistically repeat, no matter where your starting point is, because consistency always wins.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: It will always win over complexity.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_00: Now, I will take a step back too, because if you didn't listen to Tuesday's episode on Sustainable Success Tuesday, I believe it was episode number 55, go back and listen to that.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: That will also be helpful for you in terms of quieting the mind down each night.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_00: What I gave you in the CEO brain dump, even if you're not an entrepreneur and don't think of yourself as a CEO, go back and listen to that episode because what I teach is absolutely going to help you with all of your goals to relax and to sleep better.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: So, habit number one for sleeping better is create a clear ending to your workday.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: Now, whether you work at home or you own a business or you work outside the home or you are a homemaker and your family is your full-time job because that really is a full-time job unto itself.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: Your brain needs to know when your work day is finished.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: One of the easiest ways to do this is with some kind of a closing ritual.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: Again, it does not have to be complicated.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: It just needs to be something.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: And this can be literally take two or three minutes, look at tomorrow, write down anything you don't want to forget.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_00: If something is still unfinished, put it on tomorrow's list instead of trying to keep it in your head all night.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: And then tell yourself, okay, I've captured it.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_00: I'll come back to it tomorrow.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_00: That simple.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_00: That simple act alone gives your brain permission to let go.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever it needs for tomorrow is already written down.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_00: It's there.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_00: You don't have to keep thinking about it.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: And now it's going to be easier for your brain to quiet down.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_00: Habit number two: lower than noise.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_00: Our nervous systems were never designed to receive information every single solitary waking minute.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if you've been listening to me for any length of time or you know me, you know I'm feeding myself information a lot.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I have to quiet that down.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: I choose moments.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_00: I strategically, intentionally quiet that down because we're not meant to do that.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: That's what leads to overwhelm.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: It leads to burnout.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_00: Even if what you're doing is something you are passionate about, it will lead to overwhelm and burnout eventually.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: So try giving yourself 20 or 30 minutes with less input.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: Longer is better.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: If you can give yourself an hour, great.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: Two hours, even better.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: But start simple 20 minutes, 30 minutes with less input, meaning that you play softer music, you read something that's enjoyable.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't have to mean that you're sitting in silence.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_00: It can mean that you're having a quiet conversation with your partner or your spouse.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: You're listening to instrumental music or ocean waves or sitting outside for a few minutes or sipping that cup of tea.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_00: Let your brain experience less stimulation before you are asking it to go to sleep.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_00: Now, habit number three is going to be dim the environment.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_00: One of the simplest things you can do is begin telling your body that nighttime has arrived.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: Turn off some of your lights.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe get the red lights.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_00: They help to calm the nervous system and signal that to your circadia rhythm that it is nighttime.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_00: You don't have to be perfect at this.
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_00: Just start reducing the bright screens.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_00: Now remember, blue light is in your phone, it's in your laptop, it's in your tablet, it's in your TV.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: All of those are stimulating.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: So just make your environment feel different than it did during the middle of the afternoon, during the early evening, because your body will start to pay attention to this and to those cues.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_00: And over time, it will start recognizing those cues as the moments that it's supposed to let go and start calming down and winding down.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_00: Now, habit number four is going to be asking yourself one question.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_00: Just like I encouraged you to ask your body in the morning what it needs, I want you to ask yourself one question at night.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: What went well today?
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: Now, notice I didn't say you should ask yourself, what didn't I get done?
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: Or what did I forget?
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: Or what should I have done better?
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: Most of us naturally replay what happened and what went wrong in our day more than anything else we will replay.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_00: It's just natural.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: We do it.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to shift from that.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: And instead of spending that time thinking about the things that did not go right, I want you to spend a moment or two reminding yourself of what did, what went right today.
• 8:34
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you kept a promise to yourself.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe it was that you drank more water or took a walk.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you had a difficult conversation.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you simply got through a hard day.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_00: That's enough.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: Recognize that.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: Your nervous system needs evidence that you're making progress.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: So when we think about the things that went right, that signals that we are making progress.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_00: It gives our bodies, our minds, and our nervous systems evidence.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_00: Habit number five, prepare tomorrow's first hour before you go to bed.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_00: Now, this one's made a huge difference for me.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: Take a few minutes before bed to make tomorrow easier.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: Lay out your clothes, fill up your water bottle, put your keys and your purse and everything where they need to be for you to get them simply, easily, and without having to look.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_00: Set out your vitamins, pack your lunch, do as much as you actually can the night before.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_00: If you want to journal in the morning, leave it where you will see it.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: Have it all ready to go.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: When you reduce the number of decisions in the morning that you need to make, then your decision-making process does not deplete your capacity as early in the day.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: So it increases your capacity.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: You know, we're all on this decision fatigue.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: We make all these crazy decisions constantly, constantly, constantly.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_00: If you like makeup, you probably have too many lipsticks.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: So there's decisions.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_00: If you are like most women, you have too many clothes.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_00: There's too many decisions.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_00: Right off the bat, you didn't even get downstairs, probably, and out of your bedroom.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, so many of us have too much food in our house instead of not enough.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_00: And that's too many decisions.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_00: And do we look at our emails?
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_00: Do we answer this one first?
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_00: Do we check our text?
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: Do we check our social?
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: Do we do it?
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's too many decisions.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_00: And it creates decision fatigue.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: So the more you can reduce the decisions by preparing the night before for the next morning, then the less tired your brain gets right off the bat.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_00: It increases your capacity and leaves more room for the decisions that you need to make all day and gives you better clarity moving through your day.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_00: Now, here's the bigger lesson.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_00: What I do not want you to do is leave this episode thinking that you need a perfect nighttime routine.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_00: I want to reiterate that again.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_00: You do not.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: This is not the point of this.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_00: The point is to create a gentle transition into your night so your body knows it's time and into your sleep so your body can actually go into sleep easily and stay there.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: Now, when we create this gentle transition, it tells your mind the day is over, tells your nervous system you can stop being on alert, and it tells your body that it's safe for you to rest now.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_00: Those little moments matter.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: And sleep is not a reward for getting everything done.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_00: It's one of the things that allows you to do your best tomorrow and keep doing more.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_00: So this week's wellness reset is just a just one evening habit.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I'm always recommending that you start with just one and get consistent with it before you add the second and then add the third.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_00: Get consistent with each habit that you want to change before you keep adding the next.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_00: Practice it every night for the next seven days.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_00: Just that one thing that you pick from this episode.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you end your workday with a two-minute brain dump.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_00: And if you need more on the brain dump, go back and listen to Tuesday's episode.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_00: But maybe you dim the lights earlier.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you prepare tomorrow before bed.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you spend one minute asking yourself what went well today.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_00: Just keep it simple.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_00: Build the consistency.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_00: That's the number one thing.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_00: Then add the other habit when you're ready.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_00: And small changes, when we repeat them consistently, become sustainable and they create lasting wellness.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_00: So if this episode is encouraging you, I'd love to hear which habit you decide to choose for the week.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_00: Come find me on Facebook.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: Let me know if you're looking for more practical wellness strategies that support your mind and your body and your nervous system every day.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: I would love to invite you to learn more about the limitless reset method and join our free limitless living community.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: You can find all of that at my website, frederica davis.com.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_00: So until next Thursday, remember, rest is not something you earn after you've done enough throughout the day.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_00: Rest is part of how you become the healthiest version of yourself, which helps you do all the things throughout the day.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_00: So until next time, be rooted, be resilient, and be limitless.