Latest / Rotgrind - Narrative Declaration / Uniting the People
Transcript
- Quick check, how fast can all of you run? I think I can outrun that. You do know that like every single person here with like a knife on them wants to kill you and sell you for parts, right? One of the children raises their hands. What's evil? Ask your mom. There you go, you got your Ruhua Empreg, happy pride. Wow! Does that mean that snot's the father? And everyone who's ready to play some Rock Grime? Yeah! Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba! Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba! Welcome everybody to another exciting episode of Rock Grime where we fall into the lava and we encourage you to also have a good day. Wait, is that what we're doing? No one told me this. Please get me out of here. Goodbye. And also, if you're listening to this, all playing Do an Awakening, haha addict, haha points at you, haha addict. You know, the pot calling the kettle black. If the video on this stutters, it's because Zoran has it open on the second monitor and is rearranging the bass well worth it. The perfectly placed Harkonnen bass. Yeah, exactly. That would be really important, yeah. Oh no. The speaker has it open right now, I can tell. You, you punk, you're like, that would be the worst thing, moving boxes. That'd be crazy. Oh no. I have to I have to find my thing on my Steve day. Oh, there it is. You can hear it in the background. Oh, there it is. Oh, this one. Oh, perfect. There's some, there's someone who's going to post the comments. This is exactly what I do not allow my players to have any electronic devices at the table. Thank you, Jebediah, for your pen and paper. Jebediah! I was like, I know my personal role is basically is like, hey, fellas, you know, unless you play open up your wow auction house during game. I've done it once. Only once. Thanks for fixing that in post easy. Oh yeah, he did. And my role is like, sure, I don't mind, but as long as you're active in the game, I don't care. Because like for stuff like this, if I notice that you're not moving your token while everybody else is moving, I'm like, what you doing, man? How's that base organization going there, Doc? Yeah, it's like. What's on your monitor? What's on your monitor? It's time. Screenshot now! Uh, apparently, apparently, I saw some videos or whatever. Apparently, there's like an AI, like desktop screen thing that just emulates a desktop. So you could like use chat GPT during your interview. And I'm like, oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. We, we live in a weird era. Like, we live in a society. That's, yeah, that's really wildly. Whoever lived, whoever wished to live in eventful times or interesting times, fuck you, dude. I'm really tired of living through significant parts of world history. Yeah. Yeah. But, uh, anyway, welcome everyone to another exciting episode of Rock Ride. Hope you've been having a phenomenal time. I want to introduce you to the amazing people who bring you Rock Ride, starting off with Odo. Rockie. Hey, it was me, Odo. Today, I will be bringing you Vina, the self-swashbuckler. Tomorrow, I will be bringing you a delicious pastry. Prepare yourself. I'm coming to your door. Whoa. Just like Davis. What? Davis. And then we have Hulk of the Crows. That's me. Howdy, hey. G'day, g'day. I am Hulkie Crow, and as always, I will be bringing you Rahua, the Kanrasu Warpriest. And tomorrow, I'm not bringing you anything. I need a little bit more time to get this done. You understand, right? I had a lot going on in the background. No excuses. Die. Were you organizing your base, Hulkie? What did you like to know, weather boy? Going with the extended background. Uncall GM rules, Atreides. One who's not a rolling Atreides is Speaker D. Hi, everybody. I'm Speaker D, and I'll be playing Tanhauser, the android wizard. And we have someone who is very close, very close to Uncall GM. This traitor will be worth to us more than ten legions of Sarduka. But I won't tell you who the traitor is or when we'll attack. Okay. The traitor. Salty job. Yeah, that's me. Salty job. The traitor. I was here all along. I am playing Snot a goblin. And I will be at least playing this little creature for one more session. And tomorrow, I promise you, Snot will blow up. No! I'm going to miss them. It's true. It's going to blow up. It's okay. She'll be better. It's our level of the game, Master Thurston. Hello. How are we doing today? Got to hype them up, man. No. No. No. No. No. No. No, I don't. No. Yes, you do. You're on the show. Wow. I'm going to comfort you. I'm going to comfort you in the night. And I'm going to steal your hero point. Take your hero point off. No! That's right. That's right. That's right. I ate it. I ate it. Well, you don't have the button to change the graphics, so it seems you don't. Damn it! Damn it! Go on, who else is on with that. I'm Zon the Wizard. I'll be your host for this evening playing Orn the Strix Summoner today. And of course, who wants to do a recap of last episode for a hero point, or else I will do it and steal it from you? I suppose it's my turn to bring out the Tannhauser arc. Well, as you know, we have been lost in the desert. And upon meeting a strange, sad little adherent to the Black Papacy who begged for an inevitable death that was incredibly inevitable, we came to hear about some local heretics that might be a good place for us to set up shop with. At the very least, travel to. Yet, there were still individuals circling us like vultures, vandal soldiers, we had been led to believe, that seemed to be chasing after our every move. We eventually retreated to a desert outpost that once long ago Tannhauser had occupied with his own vandal soldiers before we engaged with negotiations with a man who lived in a tub but didn't have art until he did. He totally had art. Look, there was art the entire time. Look, look, you can see the art. It's clearly there. That art always existed. Yeah. Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Upon our, uh, failure of terms to sell Ruhua into slavery, combat ensued between ourselves and the roving vandal soldiers that infuriated everybody but me who thought it was really funny because they were in cars with guns which meant that our melee fighters wished they were dead. We eventually defeated our foes That's true! sending the vandal soldiers that we hadn't killed into retreat and victory was ours at least for the moment. Okay, very good. You may give yourself a hero point. No bit? Thirsty? Well, see, I got distracted a little bit from the bit because no, because Jamie Jamie came in here and we had like something on the phone like and I was like well, oh no, super serious. Could have posted in our general chat. We got some Dairy Queen earlier today. Oh, hell yeah. This was this was the result of what happened with the bag from the Dairy Queen. The kitty. Oh! It's a kitty! If it fits, it's it. There you go. There you go. That's Kuro. That's the cat that won't that that that I don't fear biting me. He is the Burger King. The Dairy Queen, actually. She is the Dairy Queen. She is the Dairy Queen. She is the Dairy Queen. Excellent. Excellent. Good, good, good. Anyways, cats. Cats are great. Cats are amazing. But yes, so with that, the Vandals have fled off, leaving you a moment of respite in the wastes. Well, how are you how are you handling yourselves after that rather intense skirmish? Orin's having a bad time. Would it be imprudent of me to take a shot? What? How do you still have alcohol on you? Because the Game Master hasn't said that I've run out yet, so. If you want to keep your alcohol, you're going to have to make a narrative declaration to keep it. Oh, yeah! Johnson, get clean or get lucky. Yeah. Yeah, Vina will take a swig, see that her bottle is empty and go, All right, fine, I'll be responsible. He's just not waddle up with a little canister and holds it out to you. I have some here and holds out a bottle, but it, when you, if you even try to sniff it, that, that's pure ethanol. Just, oh, whoa. Okay. You wanted to light it on fire, right? Oh, I was going to consume it. Is it safe for, actually, I don't care if it's safe for consumption. I'm going to take a shot. You're pretty hardcore. No, I just have a problem, but thank you. You're pretty hardcore. You know what? I'll take that. Yeah. If you know you have a problem, you should take some steps to redress it. I can stop whenever I want to, I just don't want to. All right, we'll stop then. Well, I don't want to. Then you have a problem. Well, no, I can stop whenever I want to. I can stop right now. I think she's the captain. See, Snot's got it. You know what? It's too damn hot for me to argue with you right now. I think it's a bit cloudy today. Oh, hold on. I'll turn off the egg timer. As you go to to adjust whatever it is, you see emerging from the wreckage to the east is the tub guy walking on the mechanical spider-limbed tub towards you. Yeah, you want another piece of this, tub guy? The mechanical apparatus supporting the tub comes to an abrupt halt some 60 or so feet away. Well, I do, I do, I do say that that was some fine work you did there, but there are many more of us still. Are you sure you can keep this up all night? Yeah. Can you? Well, I will say that there are other things to be concerned about. Uh-huh. Like? And as though like on cue, there is this just rising dust cloud of sort of red dust that's coming further from the east up atop the ridge. Like you can see that you're kind of in this low depression area. Atop the ridge there is this this vast dust kick-up that has occurred. And as you sort of stare, eventually emerging from it is like a what can only be described as a building building on wheels of moving with a crane, some kind of land fortress, yes. Oh my god. It's probably staffed by several dozen people, if not a hundred maybe. me. Oh. Huh. Oh. Hmm. Well, that's not good. Quick check, how fast can all of you run? I think I cannot run that. Top man. Well, I say, I say, yes. We have already proven ourselves more than capable of inflicting great damage upon your soldiery. The resources you would reap from engaging with us would pale in comparison to that you would lose from engagement, even with your land barge. I advise you to tell your masters that discretion is the better part of valor, or, for sanity's sake, that we've all simply left. Um, I'd like to try and make a society roll to attempt to reason with him and get him to maybe let us off. Okay, so, society is not really like a charisma-based approach, though. That is true. Yeah. My hope is, hold on a second, I need to recheck all of my feats. Do you have any more? You're trying to intimidate him. Aren't you trained in intimidation? I am trained in intimidation. I do have, yeah, this isn't gathering, this isn't gathering information, this only arguably is making an impression on a noble, which I guess, like, you know, negotiation maybe. Do you have courtly graces as a fee? Yes, I do. Oh! Would these be considered nobles in this land, Mr. Game Master? Ah, well, okay, this will be a question for Speaker. Are the vandal outlaws of the desert nomads in your mind for your thing, or are there people who are more, um, noble adjacent in your mind? So, here's, I'm going to answer your question to answer the question with a question, all right? Yeah. Um, let's say we're in a village, right? a really primitive village, and let's say there's a village chief, right? Yeah. Would that chief be considered a noble for the purposes of courtly graces? No. No? Okay, the village chief is not considered a noble? Not unless they have some, like, landed, like, title, like, because you can have, like, the guy in charge who is not of, like, noble lineage. Fair enough. My, my take is this. These guys are definitely not the top of the brass nobility of the area. That's going to be guys that are inside one of the citadels. However, this guy is a diplomatic envoy from one of the foremost local powers in this social strata. So, if you could envision a, let's say, the mayor of a village or a particularly powerful and dominant burgermeister as a noble for the purposes of courtly graces, then I would say yes. But if with courtly graces we're defining nobles as the high strata of, like, oh, you have a lineage and you can trace that back and not, like, noble equivalent in societies without aristocracy, then I would say no. Yeah. I'll, I'll let you use it here. Um, in, in this case, just, just, just keep that in mind for, for uses of society. Like, try to, try to remember that you should, like, ah, because of courtly graces I want to do it, rather than just I'm using society. That is society. It is a baseline does not, like, let you do this. No, no, yeah, of course. I, I, I definitely understand that. Um, if you'd prefer, I could just roll warfare. I do have lore. No, no, this would, this would like, it's society's fine. Um, it, it's more the, when you are trying to influence a person, um, typically it's going to be one of the charisma based skills, unless you have, like, a feat like courtly graces, which works here. Um, using lore or stuff to influence someone is a very, like, niche ability. They aren't really intended for that. They're more for, like, having knowledge of those things. maybe, maybe impressing some people with, with your knowledge, but not like, I'm going to turn these people, you know, to my side, because, again, it's not really a charisma based thing. It is something that can be utilized, uh, arguably as a social interaction. It's not the persuasive kind. Yeah. Fair enough. Okay, well, I'm going to go ahead and roll society. And we'll get an eight on the die. If that is not enough, I may use a hero point to reroll. Well, you have to decide. Um, I'll use a hero point. Why not? Okay. We're all using a hero point. That is much better. That is going to be a 36. Whoa. Yeah. Ooh. Pretty good. That's very nice. Well, I suppose it's, we don't want to lose more, but, but you are defiling the side of heroes. Heroes are you? No, no, no, not us, not us. He kind of like bleeds back in the tub, um, almost like grasps at hidden suspenders. No, no, no, no, not us, not like that. No, no, this, this place was where a group of, of great heroes once fell. Is that so? We, we keep interlopers out, especially of the outsider can't. Tell me of these heroes. Well, there was a group that they, they, they did not like the citadels and their overlords and they rebelled against great Gogoth. Then I will tell you that I am Tannhauser, formerly of this very same land and one whose body was blown apart on the rocks out here with many of my compatriots rebuilt only thanks to the miracles of the science of Lady Sale. Wall. I declare that that is a tale you have woven, but it does impress upon me your knowledge of society and thus I am inclined to perhaps believe you, sir. Thank you, I am very knowledgeable about society, less so about... It would appear so. Yes. Do you find my graces to be of courtly nature? Very much, as though if I were noble, I would be influenced by them. That is true, yes, I feel like I would have made quite an impression upon you. Welcome back to Pathfinder your game. I love that Speaker didn't even fucking blink at me. He's like, all right, fucker, you want to play this game? We're going to play this game. It's called Yes Am. Exactly. Well, then, if you truly respect those that rebel against Golgotha, are you rebels as well? We are. We are, vandals of the best and the brightest of us are taken. They become the DNA. I see. The what? The what? That's a myth. Hey, Speaker. Yeah? You're going to inform your friends of what that all means? The DNA is not a myth. It is very much real. Who would call it that? Huh? The Diktat National Army. How? They are the guardians of the citadels, the organized militarized force of Lord Golgotha. Vandals are cannon fodder. They're raiders, plunderers. Expendable. What? Yes, that is what you want. He looks down at hands? What? What? You are meant to clog the machine guns of the enemy while the DNA soldiers take up residence in the land you have claimed and fortified it. You are a tool of expansion. What? Sorry, I had to be the one to bring this to your attention. I thought I was cool. Well, you are. You are cool. It's just that you're also neat. Everyone said I was cool. You are cool. And that it would be cool if I threw myself at the thing with the grenade on it. They said it would be funny and cool. All right, well, that does track. Tannhauser has a war flashbacks to every time he's told another vandal to jump onto a grenade because it'd be cool. how many does he have? It's a montage like it's Raider Tannhauser just like hey, you should jump on this grenade. It would be awesome. It's distressingly upbeat. if you are in rebellion to Lord Golgotha and his diktat, then we can treat. If not, I advise you in the memory of these heroes of whom I once ranked amongst, you let us go. if I go back, they will require some form of proof. Take this and I'll reach into my coat and I'll pull out some revolutionary pamphlets. Okay, okay, so real real quick, revolutionary pamphlet. are those like outset themed? Yes, but also they would probably, you know, it's kind of like a communist manifesto situation. They're meant for like lower class people to read and understand. Do they have your face on it? Probably. Is it your new face or your old face? Yeah, it's probably me with the mask going like I'm Tannhauser and I approve this message. So no one would recognize you? No, but it would speak and triumph the cause of liberty and release from the shackles of oppression. No, that might change. I, I, poor, we cannot dally here very much longer for the general may may deplore troops here. Very well. I'm going to look to everyone. Do you trust me in this? Yep. To the end of the earth, bud. Yeah. Or not. Take us to your leader. Okay. Orrin, are you coming? Looks at Orrin, who has not been looking so well. He's still bleeding a lot. Yeah. Oh, let us fix our bird man first, though. He's been crying in the back for, for a while. No. Oh, no. Are you doing anything? And then beat me up? Everything is defensive. No, you turn into a big lizard. It was cool. It was cool. You turned into a big lizard. You were awesome, Orrin. You were super cool. Everybody loved it. He just throws a scrap mouth mouth fucking side. He just throws up. Like, oh, ooh. Ooh. Check out money. The big mech puts Orrin into the seat and puts a little tent over him and gives him a sippy bottle. Not a sippy bottle. Not the sippy. Here, Orrin, eat some of this disgusting insect paste you tried to feed me all the time. It will make you feel better. It always makes you feel better. You can make insect paste out of the funny desert insects. I'm sure there are some weird spiders. I'm sure he's kind of filled up on brain. No, that's going to give you prions. Yeah. Orrin, I don't know how to tell you this, but you know what? I'm not going to tell you this. Dan Hauser, he's not going to live past 60. well, duh. Come on, man. have to go back to first edition dog. He fills all his wounds with mud and bugs. Life expectancy of restriction of Pathfinder second edition is reported to be 40 years. Oh, man. Another source mentions that his lifespan of 60 years. He's suggesting expectancy of restriction being very dependent of war. So, well, it's either 40 or 60. Do not look up goblins. It's still right. Oh, God, what's the life expectancy of goblins? Like, two and a half days? If they're lucky. What moment? And he sort of, like, leans back, the tub guy, and his mouth goes, like, wide open, and you hear this, like, slight, like, as he's leaning back, then he shakes his head, leans forward. It would appear that there is a consensus that you may be to be believed. Really, now? Well, considering your frame and the expedient way in which you killed many members of our roving band, I would say that you have perhaps fit the proverbial bill. indeed. Now, we, as we said, are not staying around here for fear of General Dusk's patrols. That's him, points at the big lamb barge. Oh, no, no, that is, that is ours. Oh. Are you sure? I thought we was gonna fight it. usually we do wind up fighting large mechanical vehicles. You do that? Yeah, and we totally won last time. In other places than Golgotha? Yes. Whoa. Ever heard of a chainsaw car? that's stupid. That's stupid. That's stupid. I thought it was cool. Shut up. Yeah, it's called a circle. We have cooler things here. We have, we have, we have circle blade carts. Oh, yes, that's right. The much superior version. I see. Hell yeah. Oh, yes. Where did you find that one? Where did you put this command next to that? Fly Kia? Not fly Kia. I love shopping at fly Kia. First of all, bloat Kia. I mean, it's not just flies. It's not just flies. Well, it's like fly guys. I would like, I guess. I think, I think that bloat us, but drawn like the little instruction guy in Ikea furniture assembly. Oh yeah. Yeah, buddy. Swedish bloat us. Oh my gosh. Okay. Okay. Okay. It's like bloat us like, like helping players with path builder. Like, so you want to build a monk. Excellent. I am bloat us. That's Swedish bloat us. Oh my gosh. Swedish bloat us is one of the rare ones. The funny, the funny is that if you do write it like bloat us, it means wet us. We got to get alpha abuse in a voice, uh, Swedish bloat us. I agree. Yeah. Swedish. That's the deep, that's the deep level play. Absolutely. Yeah, exactly. You're like, alpha abuse, uh, but, uh, if, I suppose if you wish, you, you would be admitted onto our, onto our marge as we depart this, this place. That is amenable to me. The others, are you willing to accompany these vandals that once tried to kill us? I'm already fixing up the mech. Sure. If you think that's what's for the best, Danny. Excellent. Then we go. where, where exactly are you going? We're attempting to come with us, but do you have a destination? Yes, we're attempting to meet up with revolutionaries in the area. Those that are attempting to oppose the reign of the diktat. More than that, I have not there. You mean, Nastrom, then? Is that who you're going to engage with? I believe so. Let me check my notes. Nope, last notes in here were about the dinosaur society. Great. That makes sense. The speaker's like, new season, I'm coming back, guys, I'm going to be so on the ball. Dinosaur timeline changes. Yeah, that was one session. My note for that session was retail dot dot dot. Nastrom was the one that told us about it. Yeah, I actually knew I remembered the name Nastrom. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we do know where her and her dissidents dwell. They dwell in the crags by the outer wall of the citadel. It will require us getting very close to deliver you there. OK. Is that possible? Would it be worth it? What is in it for us? Can we keep the tree as we discussed earlier? No, you can't keep the tree. Oh. But what I can tell you is this. What Nastrom is planning is going to be bigger than even I had imagined. if we pull it off, you'll be remembered in history for your role in this. Both you and your leader. I don't know what possibly we could have. All we have here is this simple land fortress. yes, this is a very crummy thing. Like twiddles thumbs like, I don't know how we could help. All we have is this gigachad death fortress. It would be of great utility to us, no doubt. More allies for the cause. Could you use that massive crane to just grab us? And just dump us beyond the citadel wall? Oh, wait, I suppose we could. I mean, that crane, to be honest, is more meant for demolishing, but I suppose we could use it for another purpose. Well, we are instruments of destruction in some ways and in some fashions. If the moment calls for it, you could just make us into the wrecking ball. Yeah, wherever they have gone. Yeah, yeah, wherever they have gone, they've just destroyed things. Yeah, that seems to be a really unfortunate habit of ours. Unfortunate? It's great. I like this goblin. They get it. Yeah. some of that you managed to make your way atop the Vandal Land Barge fortress. That is a, like, self-sufficient small settlement. So as you get on it, you can tell there are dozens of people, like, milling about on here. there's even, like, I don't know, two shops and an inn. It's one of those more esoteric Final Fantasy style towns that you often find yourself in. Zira, who are? They wouldn't even know what to do with you. They don't even have a wood butcher. You mean a craftsman? What? No, wood butcher. Like, they handle trees. But why would you... You know, like, they shop... Yeah, they shop them up and put them into pieces and stuff like that. Yeah, wood butcher. That's a carpenter. That's a carpenter's snot. What are you talking about? Do... So, uh, Tub creature, does this, uh, do you call them wood butchers out here, or are they carpenters? Oh, I apologize. Apologize profusely. You keep referring to me as Tub person. Yeah, it's Tub Guy of House Guy. No, no, no, no, no, no, my, my name, my name. I spent a narrative declaration. It's House Guy. Oh, my God. What is your name? Salty. I knew that was coming. Mark down, mark down the hero point, please. Yeah, that's right. Spend a hero point. It's, it's Tub of House Guy. I'm Tub of House Guy. This is abuse, chat. I'm being abused. Just see, like, the wince of pain across this person's eyes as their brain in reality is rewritten. you allowed narrative declarations to happen. I'm just using the system. We were bad. The person went, went out of his way to, like, find a name for this now beloved NPC. I, I used a Mad Max name generator and everything. Fuck yeah. Tub of House Guy. Tub of House Guy. Tub of House Guy. I mean, that is a good name. It's true. It's true. You're going to say Tub of House Guy. Thank you, Tub. Thank you, Tub. You are very welcome. Thank you, Tub. A humanoid-esque creature with an enlarged brain watches you, Rahua. I don't, I don't like that. Well, you're the largest plant. Mutants, yeah. Yeah. You're like the largest plant that people have ever seen before. So, then you walk around and that's to it. I'm not a plant, though. I'm a Kanrasu. She turns around and squints at you like, what the fuck you're talking about? Do you see me? Do you see the little orb in the center of this frame? No, I see the leaves and the wood. Look closer with your little gallinoid eyes. Yeah? Look at the relatively basketball-sized orb in the center of the sphere. What about it? That's me. That's me, Snot. I want you to see me. Well, that's you. That's me. Everything else is just as a construct. It's an animate frame. In a lot of ways, it's like you're a robot. Except I'm piloting this. You're a mech pilot like me? In a manner of speaking, yes. That's so cool. You must be rich to have one made out of wood. No, I'm just the cosmos in a small package. You do know that every single person here with a knife on them wants to kill you and sell you for parts, right? That's crazy. I'll send them to the void beyond stars if they die. High five. High five. High shovel. Wow. The brain creature like floats over to you, Rahua, coming within about five feet and just like cocked head, which might just be because the bulbous like rear cranium is so large that it's like causing the head to move to its side. It pulsates. Oh. Not fond of that. Can I help you? You feel it talk into your mind. Oh, we're doing this. And you hear a distinct I see here. You see me? I see you. I should hope so? Your earliest mistake will devour you. What? It turns to look away from you and to look at Veena. Uh-oh. You're going to go home. Master is very angry with you. I'm going to look down at the gun on my waist. I'm going to pull it out and I'm going to point it at the tank in the brain is suspended in. What'd you say about my mom? you want to rephrase that? The head like lulls away from you towards Oren. I'm looking up with his big wet eyes. He blinks. Will you say yes now? No. Oren slinks further in the mech. Don't remind me of that. The brain like thing turns away. The other one. The other one who's not here. The man with the metal. Soon he will so magnanimous and the brain thing floats off. You little bitch. I don't like him. I don't like him. Did I kill that? Were you guys just talking to each other like right now? That was very awkward. Oh, nobody could hear the brain? No, it talked into my brain. Oh, the mutant? She points at Matt the thing that moves away from them. Yeah. Yeah, that's just a... Yeah, yeah, he's just a psycher. A psychic guy. Huh. Well... Not fond of that. I... I'm going to throw him off the side. No, they're just guys. That's what they do. They're like that. They shoot mind bullets. Have they ever considered not being like that? Well, they don't have a choice, Rahua. Everybody has a choice, snot. No, they're like that, Rahua. They're just like that. They need the suspension water and everything. Rahua gets real low and real close to snot. Everything in this reality is consensual snot. They wanted to be like this, even if they didn't know. Rahua, I think you're a little bit ableist right now. Do you want to see a cool bug that lives in my body? Whoa, you have a cool bug in your body? I have many cool bugs. Wow. She climbs up on him and looks at all the cool bugs. Look at my cool bugs. Wow. Snot needs to take the class feed Adderall prescription. Never. She gussles a little bit of earth blood and then looks at bugs. I wonder what the bugs are like here in Golgotha. Probably like, fucked up spiders. Big scarabs. Yeah, yeah. They're big and flat and big. We did have the introduction of the beetle riders at one point. That is true. That's true. Yeah. The beetle riders were from the North land. I believe you introduced them. Yeah, yeah, yeah, which are canon in documents we've written, but they're like in the icy wastes far to the north. they there's all there's also funny centipede that decided to regrow its its limbs into teeth. That one is out there. Hell yeah. Yeah. All bremblows. They're all part of the bremblow family. Oh, no. Lifecycle. Yeah, native to Golgotha. That's why there's been so many. I mean, that centipede is statted and has art somewhere. It's true. Where could they find that there soon? Uh, you know, over at our Patreon, you know, patreon.com for slash narrative decoration. We're pretty cool. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Can they find all of these cool creatures over there narrative decoration at patreon.com? We do. We do make some pretty cool stuff. Oh, my God. Will the land barges and such things also have their cool stats planted there within due time? Maybe one day you can see them there. Maybe. That's so cool. That's so sick as fuck. It's peem. It's peem. Yeah. So with that, you can see that the barge is moving. The sun is setting. The day is turning into a rather vibrant crimson. a red sun. Red sun over paradise. Yeah. What? How's everyone trying to spend an evening on the land fortress? I burned something. Healing. Okay. Thank you, Zoran. I feel like a 66 out of 173. Ow. Vina's going to find Tannhauser when things kind of quiet down. Tannhauser is probably going to be in the heart of the land barge, kind of talking uproariously and joyously about the revolution and the group's exploits to all the vandals. Yeah, he's at home, right? Yeah. This isn't his life. Yeah, there's like, there's dozens of people just like watching in raptured while the industry like churns around in the kind of furnace heat of the land fortress's interior. And then we stuffed him behind a couch! A couch! Yes, yes. And then I see Vina approaching. Ah, and this is Vina. Vina, the silver swashbuckler extraordinaire. She is a worthy captain than she knows. Without her at my back, I don't know how many of those exploits I would have survived. Come here, Vina! Oh, all right, all right. Hello. Tell these fine and enterprising vandal soldiers of your glorious exploits. shit. Oh, fuck it. All right, Vina's going to, like, grab a, like a, like a, I'm sure they've got some kind of horrible go-go-thing grog on the table. She's gonna take it and down it and just, it's oil. All right. That's delicious. It's cleaning ethanol, like, just thinned out. It's clear and smells strong. Made for Vina, there we go. Oh, yeah. It's like, you've reached that point in witnessing someone's slow consumption by, like, substance abuse of, like, yeah, we probably should step in at this point and be like, are you okay, bestie? It's like oil-cleaning ethanol thinned out with the liquids from various creatures you find out in the waste. Exactly. Yeah. All right. Yeah, Vina's gonna lean in. She's gonna loop an arm around Tan Hauser's shoulders. Let me tell you guys the story about how we fought a giant rot platypus with this guy walling it in and throwing acid under his feet. You! It's like this masked metal, like, deckhand. What is a platypus? Is it like a dragon? Yes. Yes, it is. It's really big. Think of, like, the body of a rodent and, like, a long duckbill and also spines because it just kind of has those. another hand goes up. You! Uh, that's a duck. Uh, it's like, um, it's like an, it's like an evil bird. Oh my god, these guys are going to see vultures. Look at that duck! Right? No, no, no, we're going to do emotional damage to Vita. One of the children raises their hands. You. What's evil? Well, ask your mom. My mom died in the desert wars. I'm really sorry about that, kiddo. Go ask a trusted parental figure, and if you don't trust anybody on this battle barge, um, then, um, ask your friend. Nah, I'm just messing with you. Everyone laughs at you, Vina. Ah, all right, all right, you got me. You know, I'm not good with children. I once gave a child a bottle of wine, and it ruined her entire life. I used to be a children. Oh my god. Wow! Yeah, I want to go around telling people that, that's not really that cool, you know. It's not a funny bit. I heard she jumped into the swamp or something. She's probably fine. Anyway, fuck all that. I'm going to tell you a story about how we were super fucking badass, and we kicked the ass of a giant rot creature. You ever seen the rot? It's freaky as hell, and I'm going to roll performance. Because I actually have a plus 17 in performance, and I've never used it, not a once. Holy damn. Well, that's not great, but it's still a 25. 25 is good. 25 is pretty good. The people are pretty enraptured. You can tell they don't get performances this good here. exactly. And Veena's just going to start going into the various rot creatures that they fought. She'll talk a little bit about the platypus. She'll talk a little bit about rot dad and this. She'll talk a little bit about the very first one, the bull guy. Can't forget the bull guy. We love bull guy. And yeah, she'll just regale people with stories and she'll like lead over to Tannhauser, you know, like kind of punching him on the arm and like gesturing for him to join in and recount the stories. Oh yes, many great battles we fought, but not all of them. We were lucky enough to survive unscathed, but from each victory a triumph, from each defeat a bitter lesson, and our enemies, how we brutalized them. We left nothing of our foes, and so we shall do to the foes of common liberty in this the coming days. Another hand goes up. Yeah. Hello, I have a question. Okay. Is it true what they say? Do you have a tree with you? He's not a tree, he's more of like an orb that pilots around a tree body. That's right. And the orb will get really offended if you try to mess with the tree, so really don't. And should any man attempt to do so, the unspeakable horrors of the chaos demence will be thrust upon them. Fear that tree, my friends, for that tree has sent man, woman, even gnomes sputtering out through the pages of history, disperse about like a smear on the sands. He cuts a Rahua just a tree. Yeah, what's Rahua doing? He's just looking at it like a scarab beetle that's scuttling along the ground. He picks it up, kind of studies it for a little bit. The tree bark splays open on his chest, puts it inside, shifts close. He gives a little smile. If he looks up, he can see not in the distance, and he in the distance as he lights something on fire. He's also a pretty good plug for brick, apparently. Oh, yeah, that's right. He does have a suspicious ability to obtain narcotics. Correct. I forgot about that. I'm going to ask him. Oh, do you have any narcotics on you? No. Oh. Not today. Yeah, I'm sorry. Yeah, like, like, oh, man! Damn it! No, they're actually, they're, like, incredibly just caught up in everything that, like, that Tannhauser is kind of dropping down on them. Hell, yeah. Is it true you're gonna kill the general? it is almost certain. Should he not? Well, let's be honest, we all know these generals. Any foe of the common man is a foe of me. Let this be a lesson to your vandals. It's, like, deep nodding between them all. But, but, but you, you think you could take down General Dusk? I have no doubts. Do you know anything about General Dusk? Why don't you tell me about General Dusk? He's a warlord. Who does punch souls out of people's body? He's a warlord. Like, dude, who, how strong could he be? Like, he's as strong as the people he's running, right? He's just a guy, right? They call him the world ender. Hell yeah. I relieve instantly bitch out. Well, time to go. He's, he prefers to be called the massive, but everybody calls him the world ender. He has a spiked mace that said that every spike on it was made from a barge he personally tore apart with his hands. He replaced his, his entire throat with some kind of augmentation that lets him shout and burst people's ears apart. Ooh. you guys got earplugs? I saw him from afar once. He, he shouted at one of the land barges and it flipped over and then he walked up to it and and he, he opened, he, he opened his shirt and, and there was a mouth inside it, a metal mouth. Hmm. He ate a man. Well, he's far from the first cannibal we've had to dispatch. That is true. No matter how mighty his voice is, nothing is mightier than the No, you, you, you don't understand. The mouth on his stomach ate the man. And as we drove away, we could hear him laughing while he was still eating the man. So he has two mouths. That is a little freaky. Could be worse, though. Well, let's not say that. He could have three mouths, I guess. Yeah. That is true. He could always have more. Maybe he has a mouth. Maybe he has four mouths. Then what do we do? Fuck. If he has four mouths, then we do the forfeit. We cut to like, all right, we're leaving Beigel go. Good side arc, everybody, but four mouths. Thurston doesn't know how to design encounters. Fuck. That's too many for me. The raider barge is fine. The giant barge is fine. Working retail, it's terrifying, but it's okay. Four miles on a guy. I can't do that. That's scary. We got to go home. Bye, Thurston. It's too damn scary. Smash cut, you just see the airship flying away. Indiana Jones flight, overworld montage. Everybody back in the airship. Go, go, go, go, fuck itself. True. Erndale comes back. So how's the, we didn't finish. What? What do you mean? We didn't finish. We're not going back. We had four mouths. Four mouths, dude. The campaign's fucking over. It's too many, it's too many mouths, Erndale, we couldn't do it. I'm so tired. I'm so tired. What? I'm so tired. Hulky? Do you need help, buddy? Yeah, like, I'm so tired. Hulky? I'm so tired. I'm so tired. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I didn't say hug. Happy pride. Happy pride. Happy pride. Grabs onto Hulky, cries a little bit, and goes, why must there always be war? Why? It's a, it's a vaunted tradition here at narrative declaration. It sure is. Look, the swallow hole ability is on an amazing number of eye-level creatures. So much, reset the chalkboard a number of times Vore has been mentioned for a stream. Days zero. Finally a stream for me. Reset the chalkboard. Fuck. Well, nothing we haven't dealt with before, eh? I don't care what horrors this land has to provide. I've faced it before. I've had my body blown apart with explosives. I was rebuilt atom by atom through Zesco and science. You think I'm scared of a man with two mouths? No, I thought you'd probably be more scared of the legions of DNA troops. Yeah, yeah, that was what I was going to be scared of. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hmm. We'll figure it out. What's the worst that could happen? We die? I cannot fear death. No, you live and then they take you below. Hmm. Huh? Letting me live has been the last mistake of many a man and it would be their last mistake. I do not fear death and when I am done with this land, when I have freed outset, I will return here and I will liberate those below and bring light to the dark. Oh, you wouldn't die if you went below. You'd live forever because they're down there. Hmm. Give me a will save, Tannhauser. Sure thing. Ba-ba-ba-ba. Uh, 29. Okay. You are assailed by flashing images at this. It's like, there's kind of more raucous laughter and joviality at your, your response to this. But, images start to flood into your mind in, in a pretty, like, distinct order. The first, the first of which is you see the immense citadel. even though you've never seen this specific citadel, it appears in your mind. But then it appears again as though inverted. It's like, upside down. And instead of open sky silhouetting it, there's rock and dark stone. And it takes on this almost, like, ominous black stone appearance as it, like, goes further and further down. And as you, you see this image, it flashes back to a robed skeletal figure, um, partially ablaze. A figure you haven't seen for almost a lifetime. Um, and, and you remember this figure from the, your brief stint in the temple during your earliest adventures. And then you, you cut into the interior of this blackened inverted fortress. And there you see dozens of robed figures all congregating around what appears to be a fire. And as you see the fire, you, you, you feel the importance of it. And then you snap back to the revelry. Oh, shit. Oh, that's, uh, down the hole to the left. Right, thank you. A moment. Uh, and I'm going to actually get up and leave the revelry. Okay. I'm gonna trail behind him. Vina. What's the matter? I think I know where the fire is. They brought it down. That's good. down below. No. No, it's not good. Because that means we're going to have to venture where the light doesn't shine. Where the darkest aspects of this land gather. Golgotha's military is fearsome. but in the depths below there is cold black eternal night. See, not terribly excited to go anywhere we can't see the sky, but we came here with a job to do. Two jobs, really, the way that I see it. One, we find a way to undo what happened to Uncle Blaze. And two, we try to leave your home a little better than how we found it. I only hope I have enough time. Even should we win a thousand victories, it may not be enough to free both this land and outside. One step at a time. Leaving it a little better than the way we found it is, it doesn't mean all the problems are fixed, or that your work's gonna be done once we free Uncle Blaze and once we get this all fixed, but the step is a step and if I learned one thing from you, it's that a good revolution is a million baby steps that all lead up to that final grand moment where you can look back at all you've managed to accomplish and suddenly all those small steps don't seem so small anymore. But he's true and wise. There's a reason they call it a struggle after all. Triumphs, parades, and victories, those are the tools of power. We, we must still grasp for it, but we will have it in our hands. It is inevitable. Right. So, what exactly is down below? Do you know? The Black Papacy. You saw the facsimile of them in Sandal Declan's home, the part told to children and far off lands. Golgotha only functions thanks to a vast and overwhelming slave cast. The lucky ones get to toil to death under the red sun. The unfortunate stay below. They are inundated by the magic of the undead. Not necromancy, but vampires. They are made their thralls, and they are anointed in a religion so heinous and so dreadful that it is stamped out on sight in every other place but here. Down below is where wills are broken and nightmares rule. And that is where they have taken our flame. well, shit. But it could be worse. They're not likely to have four mouths. That is true. That would be really fucked up. I would have to leave. All right. All right. Let's take our fucking break at that one. that was angry. I'm sorry. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm, I'm actually, I'm actually annoyed here. Let me tell you why. Because I had this whole great, this whole great funny line that I'm like, uh, Vena and Tannhauser are having a moment. But like, the second Odo was like, oh, it's like, you know, like, you know, like, a million baby steps. And I'm like, great. From now on, every time I think of the revolution, I'm just going to call it the million baby revolution. And that's going to be how this thing is in my fucking mind. But I didn't interrupt. I didn't interrupt because I wanted you to have a great fucking moment. And then you spoiled it, speaker. Okay, let's go on break. Love you all, chat. Bye. You ever wonder how we can afford all this amazing art and keep the production going and narrative declaration? Well, it's because of you. Either you're a member of Patreon, a YouTube member, or a Twitch subscriber. All the way to just someone who's just willing to watch the shows whenever they come out for free. And then telling people that we exist, it's thanks to you that narrative declaration is able to grow to the size it is today. And if you want to really help it grow even more, all the revenue that we get from our merch store at narrative declaration.shop, where you can pick up game mats, t-shirts, posters, all sorts of things. That also goes directly into supporting artists, animators, editors, players, game masters, anybody. Anybody who helps make everything to be due here successful. So thank you so much to you for supporting the show. Either it's monetarily or just with your time. Thank you so much and enjoy the show. Um, funny bit. Yeah. Very funny. Wow. Can't see that. It's been a bit of an awkward coming back because you just guys just, you know, hammed on each other. Now you come back, we don't know where the role play is going. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Snot climbs into the mech with Oren and holds out a grilled scorpion towards him and goes, I got your thing. He munches on it. How are you feeling? Give me a fortitude save. Instantly. Instantly. Damn. There was no pause. I know you're fucked up, little man. Time to die. Well, luckily, I have a plus 22 to this role because my fortitude is magic. It's a master level, so it is a 34. Yes, there you go. You're fine. You're fine. You crunch into this. It tastes so, um, it kind of tastes vinegary, but it's good. It's good. It's a good kind of vinegary taste. I dipped it in oil rinser. Oh. Munch, munch, munch, munch. It takes another bite. It's pretty good, right? No. What? What? What? It feels like my teeth are going to come out. You don't like it? No, I appreciate it, though. Thank you, not. Yeah, you look like you had a bad time there, buddy. Well, I thought I was going to do something cool, but I got my ass beat. Well, you did kill that guy that could shoot mine bullets. Yeah, but you turned into a giant lizard. Yeah, Gorgomonger's mad about it. He's mad about it. Yeah. Why? Because he's a giant lizard? No, because... I don't want to talk about it. He kind of, like, turns away in the cockpit. Like, munch, munch, munch, munch, munch. Why not? Snot has none of the social cues that the rest of the party has, and she just walks around him in the cockpit and sits down and goes, Why not? Well, because when I turned into a dragon, I asked, you know, Gorgomonger for help, and Gorgomonger didn't want to turn into a big dragon, and I did it anyway. Well, yeah. You can turn into a giant dragon. That's awesome. You know what I would do to be able to turn into a giant dragon? I would kill so many people, Oren. I would kill so many people for the power of turning into a big dragon. And what do you... Like, what did you do to turn into a big dragon? You asked your friend to turn into one? Is that all you needed to do? I have to have his permission to do it. Oh. I didn't ask for it. Oh. I was stupid. Yeah, that... That's not good. Not when he's your comrade. But... Can he, like, teach you how to do it without having to ask him every single time? He used to be able to do it just fine. But... Yeah? But I used to be able to do a whole bunch of cool things and a whole bunch of nature stuff. And now... I think I missed doing that and I didn't realize what I was doing before it was too late. Whoa. So, did you, like, give up something? The problem I'm having is that I've been throwing up leaves and all my primal powers have been slowly but surely going away. But I could still do some stuff and I didn't, I didn't know where it would come from. I just thought I was just, you know, just weaker or something. But now I've found out just by doing that that most of my stuff comes from Gorgamonger. And so, when I finally found out I turned into a dragon, I just, I took that from him. I didn't know. So, you are reliant on one another. I see. Do you feel... Do you feel like it's a... A symbiosis? Or do you feel that it's more like... A deal? Well... Orrin tries to summarize the explanation. Yeah. Where he goes... Where he basically goes, like, he explains the whole thing that happened with the toad that they met and everything else. And that Gorgamonger used to be a rock creature. And they had to put him down. But to bring him back, basically, Orrin sacrificed something of himself when he jumped into this toad's mouth. When he came out, he was able to get his friend back. But slowly but surely, he's felt weakened. And as Gorgamonger has become stronger and... And Orrin kind of then punctuates his line. He's like, I feel like... Like, I could talk to Gorgamonger now without, like, speaking anymore. Like, I know what's in his mind. Like, I can see what's through his eyes now. Yeah, he's like us. Because we're best friends. But I can't see through your eyes. Why? You can't see through my eyes. I feel like I can. I feel like I could. This is the most parasocial tier four relationship. I can see through you next week. No. We're best friends. I have cameras everywhere. Not to be like that, Orrin. You seem to be very different from the rest of the Golgothan standard. Well, I'm not from around here. Well, no. And Orrin, I'm sorry to tell you this, but... She puts one oily hand on Orrin's shoulder. And looks right at him with her one glowing eye poking out from her little mask. And she taps him once. I think you're pretty strong. And I think... Your big friend. Your big cool lizard friend. Your big Gorgamonger friend. I mean, you brought him back from the dead. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think that he should be thankful for the rest of his, you know, life that he once again has. Because, I mean, if I died and someone brought me back, I would be their number one guy, you know. I would be like, whoa! And I'd go for it. You know, always just be there until they didn't want me to be there. Until I learned how to do it. And then I would kill them and never resurrect them. But... All I'm saying, Orrin... And she, like, wipes a little bit of grease on his shoulder. I think you're pretty strong. And I don't think you'd eat him. I'm sorry if that's harsh for you. She taps him once again. But that's the Golgothan way. And then she jumps out of her mech and runs over to Rahua with another, like, scorpion. Rahua! I got you a thing! Oh, you got me a... What is that? It's a scorp... I dipped it in oil rinser. Is it alive? Maybe. Can I do a nature check on this to see if it's alive? Yes. Okay. You got a nature check. Here you go. You like bugs, so I brought you a bug. Wow, fuck me. Okay, 22. 22 is enough for you to tell if something is alive or not. It is no longer alive. Snot, this is... This is dead. It's very dead, in fact. What did you... I dipped in an oil rinser and I put it over the fire. So you killed and cooked it and brought it over to me. You wanted to show me? No, I want you to have it. Thank you? But I... Yeah. I can't really eat. Orin didn't like it. Orin didn't like it. Rahua looks over at Orin and he, like, shoots him a very dirty glare. As if to say, you look the gift horse in the mouth. You look the gift scorpion in the claw, dude. What the fuck? You just see him in the cockpit still sniffling with big, wet eyes. Oh, he still kind of said, okay. Well, thank you, Scott. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I told him that his friend is weak and he shouldn't have him around. Oh. You know, did... Did he tell you that those two grew up together? Like, they're, like, childlike bonded. They're bonded from childhood. Do I need to remind you that I, like, killed 20 of my siblings? I mean, you did. Maybe that's what you do. But that's not what people from his tribe do. Well, that's why I told him, you're not a go-go fan. And then I wiped some oil on him, you know, ritualistically, like. And then I was, like, you know... Ritualistic, or you just wanted to rub oil on him to see what we had? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. A little bit of column A. A little bit of column B. But, you know... Ah, understandable. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I had, you know, once again, oil thinner on my hands. So I did that. And then I told him that he's pretty strong and he's pretty cool. And he doesn't need, you know, a lizard to tell him that. I see. Yeah, that's what I told him. Because it's true. You are correct. Are you going to eat that? I would... I mean, if it would make you happy, I can. I can't taste it. Yeah, eat it. Okay. I eat the fried... The oil fried scorpion. Give me a fortitude. Okay, I got you. There's 10. Watch me roll very high. I have a plus 20 to 42. I believe in you. That's five on the time. It's 25. Oh, my God. Down in Golgotha, we know a little place. Every July, scorpions grow. The scorpions... The scorpion is not dissolved by your orb. Is it just sitting there in my chest cavity? Yes. It fossilizes. Oh, you have... Just watch it. You have a sick, like, scorpion tattoo on your orb now. I'm just going to leave, like... I'm just going to leave the, like, ramifications of this up in the air. You have a scorpion in your orb. She wipes a little bit of oil on his face. You are one with the scorpion now. And then she runs away. Wait, where? Like, forever? And then welcome back to the show, earned him. That would have been the funniest bitch. That would have actually been the best way to get rid of Star. Now, Thurston. Yes. Thurston. Yes. Yes. I would like to make a narrative declaration, but it's not one that affects the story. It's not one that affects the story. It's a narrative declaration. They never are. Of course, of course, of course. The narrative declaration is for you to not kill me for what I'm about to say. Uh-huh. Okay. Rahua looks down at the scorpion. Okay, yeah. Yep, keep going. Rahua looked down at the scorpion that dropped into his chest cavity. He puts his hand on it and says, Someday you'll be big enough to piss off all the players in the Elden Ring community. It's true. True. There you go. You got your Rahua empreg. Happy pride. Whoa! Hello? Does that mean that Snot's the father? Whoa. Snot a father? Snot a father. Hey, Chad. Give me a one in a two in Ring and how much you like Rock Grine. I love how we have these, like, deep character moments and then Hulky, who, by the way, like, I have to, like, sometimes take a cane and pull Hulky away from doing soliloquies. He's like, nah, I'm just going to lean into the impreg joke tonight. Thanks, man. Thanks, man. Thanks, man. I'm going to let him be present on this show. That's what I'm going to do. Calling up John Pathline. The orb dissolves the scorpion immediately because I'm done with this bit. Oh, this is how you bully your GM into getting you a Ewok. Take notes. Take notes, players. Happy pride. Happy pride. Oh, my free pride. Why does it sound like you took, like, a shot of, like, scotch or something as you said that, okay? When you were just like, I'm going to take a sip of my big bottle of orc strength. The strength is water. Oh, okay. Okay. Very good. Very good. Go ahead. Perfect. Beautiful. Art. Okay. I feel lightheaded. Go ahead, Kay. I feel lightheaded. Rahua will walk over to Oren, who is still sniveling in the mech. And punch him in the mouth. Stop being sad, idiot. You want to make an area of the declaration? Walks over. What did a mean goblin tell you? I imagine her who just walks up and says, a bitch that sniff. Ain't no cowards on my team. I didn't raise no coward. Punch him again. Oh, you flint. You're crying. You're crying, you little dirt baby, because you're dirt. You're worth nothing. It's another Oren sociopath session. Oh, my God. You're molding him into the snake plisking he needs to be. Oren leaves. He looks up from the sink. And he sees the devil horn in bed in his head grow bigger. He's like, I'm the boss. No one's here to say that it works. I say, I say. Oren brought us to hell, but we're going even deeper. I mean, he went invisible last session, so. That's true. Oh, wait. Oh, yeah, I did go. Oh. I should be drinking. You're sober for this. I'm sober for every session. Are you kidding me? Could you imagine if I was drunk? This is true. I don't take any drugs, drink, or anything. I basically have no vices, but I really should start taking gummies for rock. Only help. Wait, wait, wait. Keep relied. I don't want to talk further, but I'm sorry, no. Now I just have a montage. I just, I'm sorry. There's a montage. It's like, no speaker live. Cut back to our, like, past however many goddamn episodes we've done. All the times that we've been like, all right, we have to go beat Slabber. Go to fuck or be cut to speaker's house. Him with a gummy in his palm. The palm is shaking. You know, I can guarantee all of you. I think every single episode of Narrative Declaration has been done sober. Yeah. That sounds right. That doesn't sound. I don't know. This is when we're like, sober, dude. I was trying to think, honestly, has there ever been a, I think there's been like once, but like, that was when I think everybody was drinking. Yeah, that was the one where we did have everybody at a cocktail. I remember having one. Yeah, that, that, that occurred. That wasn't what I don't drink. Not yet. Another one but you. I hold the bottle in the car keys. Everyone was following a prank. Let's all get drunk before rock, right? Zorin, what's the, what's the over under on getting a sponsorship with an edibles manufacturing company? Can we get a glub talk edible? Probably. Oh my God. Oh my God. It would, if you took it, it would make you small. A sour pack. It's a sour patch homunculus. Oh no. So, uh, does the barge explode? We'll pay views within, within one month. Sure. We have a better chance at that point. That, that's the gauntlet. Let's, let's make an edible that fucking destroys you. And if we reach, and if we don't reach that many views, one of the hostages dies. We're calling Bricky right now and we're saying, we're saying Bricky, can we put, um, rum-tom gummies on Orchid 8? Um, what, what, what happened? Where am I? Uh, we're in Golgotha. You're in hell. Talk to Sad Oren. You knew that already, didn't you? Yeah, Rahua came up to Sad Oren and they were about to have a moment, but then I don't know what happened. Yeah, have a moment. No, Rahua brings forth the edible to the sad boy. Okay. Hey, buddy, how are you doing? My friend's mad at me. Why is your friend mad at you? As if I didn't overhear your entire conversation. Damn. Should I do a giant dragon and I didn't know I was gonna take power from him and, and it's a whole thing about permission and understanding and I didn't understand. Well, the thing I've learned in my scant few years upon the firmament is, well, twofold. One, friendship is a dance or a game of give and take. It's a two-part thing where we don't always necessarily know how much we give to others and how much we take them in kind. And if it goes one way too much, sometimes we just have to make amends, we have to live with the consequences of that. It's, if you have that kind of understanding with him, and by all accounts this is all very new to the both of you, then he should be understanding that you shouldn't have done that, or at the very least if you knew, to not do it again. And the second part, I suppose, is oftentimes it's better to ask for forgiveness rather than permission when the situation calls for it. Yeah. You're not a bad person, Oren, but sometimes when the chips are down, you, well, sometimes you have to do what you have to do. Ain't for who, uh, I'll try to think more on it. Take your time, friend. You need anything else? Do you want to, I mean, I don't have much I can offer you. I have a cool puzzle box or I have narcotics. Would you like either of those? I love, once again, great, great scene, literally ends with, well, I've got these edibles on me. I got these edibles, you love talking. I got this shit that makes you see sideways? Oren says no, and he practically makes it like a little bird nest in the back and like, he's like, no, I'm gonna, I'm gonna talk to Korka. Baby bird. And then he kind of lays his head down and goes to sleep. Be well, friend. Rahua will, uh, stick his hand into his orb and whisk forth his camouflage netting that he had two arcs ago and drape it over him like a blanket. Yeah, for sure, for sure. Um, okay. Uh, is everyone resting, uh, I assume at this point? Are there any more interaction? I think, I think now is a good time for Danhauser to rest. Indeed. Let us rest. Yes. All right. After all of that time, Oren, you regain your hit point. Yay! Yay! Um, managing to rest and get healed up. You, you spend the night on the march, each of you in, in different, in different states. Um, each of you, you know, somewhat emboldened, somewhat troubled by, by the things you have seen or felt or heard or been told by mysterious mutant brain people. Night falls. As the vast fortress continues its slow, plodding trek through the Golgothan wasteland. And you wake much to the same sky as you fell asleep to. As, as you do so, you can see that there is a, a red sun rising. Distance. Uh, the, the twilight night now replaced with a crimson sky. As you are continuing on this journey, you can tell that the, the land fortress is slowing. You seem to be coming up close towards some sort of outcropping of rocks and elevation of them ahead. And you are approached by tub of house gi. Yeah, that's right, that's right, that's right, that's right, tub of house gi, who brings you all together atop the barge. Uh, well, uh, well, uh, we are here. Uh, I believe in the rocks, we can see some of Nostrom's people that we have flying the flag of troops. It's a pair of white pants on their side. I believe you have someone there that you know that you can speak with. Yes, that would be Nostrom themselves. Oh, well, okay. As we come to a stop, you can go off the plank there. Very good. Thank you, top of gi, or whatever your name was. I'm telling you. Get another life, what actually would you be called? Well, let's, uh, let's pull up the Mad Max name generator again. Give me a moment. What was he called before he was dubbed? Yeah, yeah, before the dub ruined it, I would have been called a true blue, the grease bucket driver of the demented one. Yeah, that's what's tub of gi is, my friend. Tub of gi is fucking better. That sounds so fucking stupid. Your imagination's dumb. No! Thanks, random character and party. We were really, you know, the world was really your oyster there for the second tub, but, you know, now it's just kind of ruined. Yeah. Yeah. Can't believe you dream for a worse name. You know, I know, I knew another person from the house of gi. Oh, no. I, yeah. Yeah, it was other gi. You descend down the plank towards your rocky outcropping. Into hell. Everyone give me a perception check. We're looking for 32 here. It's the magic. Yeah. Ooh. Yeah. Uh, I got a 31. I didn't hit it. I got a 31. Hey, I got a 37. So, I don't know why it rolled me twice. The first one was a 32. I got 24. Okay. Okay, well, it seems like Tannhauser and Oren are able to detect that up above, there are at least two dozen individuals who are in cloaks that obfuscate them from conventional view. They are, um, they are hidden amongst the upper levels here in the stone rocks. They all have kind of long, musketed rifles that are trained on you. Uh, but they do not appear to be firing. They're just kind of covering your approach. Hmm. All right. Steady. Steady. No sudden movements. Why not? Because there's men with muskets that have a number. Oh. And I will point that out to my comrades. Yes. There, some of them seem to disappear, some of them return. After a few moments, one of them, uh, one of them seems to hold up a hand, like, breaking cover, allowing the rest of you to see them. Uh, all of those of you who didn't make the perception check are suddenly, like, surprised by just how well camouflaged these individuals were. They hold up a, they hold up a, a wording hand as though beckoning you to stop at you once. Halt! Uh, all of you stop, I assume? Yep, of course. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. As you, you come to a stop, there's a few minutes of sort of, not a, not a tense standoff, but just this, this moment of waiting. And then coming out from within the caverns up ahead is Ministra. She walks boldly out. She seems to have a slight scowl on her face. What have you done? You've brought vandals here. Vandals under my flag. These have come here as allies. Do I once? No, no, sorry. Uh, not my flag. That's a flag of truce. I have come to negotiate these vandals' inclusion to your movement. Inclusion? That cannot be trusted. Certainly. Do you want to kill them as much as you do? Once I was a vandal. If you would call me an ally, you must be willing to call them one in turn. Yeah. We, we take whatever we can get, but. And there's like, there's a, a pause. You can tell, you will have to make an impression on this person. Oh, are they unknowable? To convince them. You know, you know, you know, I think in this case, they might be worthy of a courtly grace or two. So, I see. Well, I happen to have that fee, um, so I suppose I'll make an intimidate check here. You'll do it. Yeah, very good. Very good. You'll do it or I'll kill you. Good. Can I aid? Yeah, absolutely. That's going to be a 39. I would love some help. I will roll Diplomachy because she's all, she's yes manning, uh, Tanniser. Yeah. I roll a six, but I do achieve a 20, which does grant a plus one bonus. So, it goes to 40. Absolutely. All right. Listen, these are vandals. I know they're kind. They are untrustworthy savages, but they are just as tired of being cannon fodder as any other member of this dreadful society. If you take control of them, lead them, could potentially organize them, use them as a vital weapon in the fight against the enemy. You cannot afford to turn down allies when your foe is the Golgothin Diktat. I suppose, but we are, we are scattered. They, they trounce around on that thing. And she like points to the land fortress. Well, it ain't stealthy. But they can be used for things that ain't stealthy. Like what? You know, kill people. And assault a distraction. Yeah. Like, it's pretty big and distracting. Send them against the front door? Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, when they knock on the front door, you go in through the back door. There's like, there's this like slight pause as you can hear the, the gears turning and then a, oh, yeah, you truly are devilish. Indeed. Yeah, we can put a bomb on it. Okay. I, I was thinking that they would fight and faint and draw out their resources while you arrange a sneak attack. I suggest a bomb. Well, I'll let you use your judgment there on which one is best. Yeah. All right. Well, then I think this, this, this could work. In fact, that mechanical monstrosity might be enough to break, break through the walls. Yeah. Would they do it? Go ahead and ask them. Oh, I, I, I couldn't. I'm going to, um, turn it to the vandals. Man of Golgotha! Nostrum asks if you're willing to charge headfirst into hell. If you are willing to bring noise and battle and bloodshed to the seat of the diktat, to knock on the front door while our allies sneak in the rear. Will you do this? It's impossible! Thankless task! There's like an immediate sound of metal tools and implements clanging on metal in like a rhythmic force. Clunk! Clunk! Clunk! Clunk! And like, it intensifies. The sound's starting to reverberate off of the cliff. Some of the, some of the, the, like the, the Strom's, you know, insurgents seem almost perturbed as like the reverberations cause small rocks to tumble. Um, but, but, but the, the sound is very clear and very defined in, in its response. Well, it seems like they don't do it. So, then, then we, we go to assault the keep of, of the diktat. Let me see your battle plans. I will lend any aid I can. I trust you've organized it well. Well, we've started a map. All right, let me see what you've done. Like, you were brought inside to the cavern, which is, you know, fairly sparse. Um, it looks like an average dungeon in Dune Awakening. Um. It's an Imperial Testing Center! Yeah, it's an Imperial Testing Site, um, it has plants inside! Those have some components you need! Load it! Quick, quick, I need all the particle capacitors and advanced servos that you can carry! Quick! Oh, they come growing trees, you know! Um, and then you are brought to, to a table that has almost like a childlike crayon drawing on it. Uh, give me, uh, give me a Warfare War check. You got it. Hey, it's a 37! You're embarrassed just seeing this plan. Like, this, this is not a plan. This is a joke. They were gonna, like, send some people inside and then put up some posters and think that everyone would follow them if they just did that. Oh, fuck. The Ask Nicely initiative. Nastrum. Like, it's like, it's like that kid who's shown off a piece of art to their friend and is, like, nodding, like, yes. This is going to get everyone killed. Uh, uh, oh, uh, you, you think so? Yeah. Yes. You're dealing with Lord Golgotha. You said you were attacking a citadel. I thought you had a plan. What are the numbers? Who all do you have here? Yeah. Well, there are... 87 of us. Oh, 86. The sans skaterer got Ted. And you thought you could take out the tech god? Well, once the people, once they, once they rise up... Tenhauser is just rubbing his head. Oh, my god. But you don't even have rocks. Is there any chance, even with these vandals that we've conscripted, any chance at all, that the forces arrayed here would have any hope of taking out a citadel? Tenhauser, with a 37 on a lore warfare check, there's always a chance. In fact, whilst your, your embarrassment stems less from the fact that they even thought they could do this... Well, that, that is actually the primary reason. But, it's more now the amusement that, you know, you could do it. Well, you're quite fortunate here. I think I can see a way. I recall my time amongst the vandal soldiers. We occasionally brushed up against several DNA platoons from this very citadel. If we, if they maintain a similar command and sentry structure, then they should likely be had intermittent breaks at this time. Positioned here and here, and certainly over a marksman at this location. Yes, if we can, I think I can conjure up something here. Something from all of this. Yes. Nastrum, if I were to create another set of plans, would you be able and willing to follow them? Ah, yes, do you need more crayons? Yes, many crayons. Okay, okay, we can, we can go get those. All right, and I'll put one over here, and another one over here, and I'll cut it with this one, and, uh, or, and, uh, eat this one. I saved you the red one. Yes, I see it! Ah, my stratagem. It can take down even this Goliath. Does it get plus one of the wounds? Well. Yes, I call it Agent's Effect. It allows me to cancel the strategy of my... Oh, my God! And on that note, everybody... As Ted Hauser is pouring over the documents and coming up with the plan, that's what we're going to call it for today before we get involved in the great siege of the Golgothan Citadel. Wall. Yay! Wall! May I have everybody to do, if you're on Twitch side, you can do exponential point schedule to see what we're going to do on our live streams, because, uh, just, like, unfortunately, this one, just a tiny bit, uh, will be out maybe for a couple weeks. But for those of you on YouTube, you'll just see us when we go, when the uploads happen. Uh, so be sure to always check our schedule, either on the Discord, in the schedule section, or, uh, Twitch, you should be able to do exponential point schedule, see our Google Calendar, uh, so you can see exactly when streams happen, along when videos happen, and stuff like that. Of course, if you want to support us, here's always patreon.com forward slash narrative declaration, where you get everything that's popping. And, of course, being a member on YouTube or a subscriber on Twitch also gives you some awesome benefits. But, of course, if you can help us in that way by helping us financially and stuff like that, that is okay. We understand how the world is. And times are tough out there, so if you really want to help us out, one of the biggest ways is to tell people that we exist. Going out into the world saying, hey, these guys do a tabletop RPG show, all that other stuff. Please share our videos, please watch our videos, all of the fun stuff, because we can put out our animations, things like that, and we would love it if people saw more of that type of stuff. So, with that, we'll go ahead and reintroduce everybody, where you can find them. Odo Roshi, where can they find you? It was me, Odo. I brought you Veena, the self-swashbuckler. You can find me at BlueSky, at OdoBytes. You can find me on Discord, at Odo. You can find me on Tumblr, if you dare. And, um, that's me. And then we got HulkyCrow. Hello, I have been HulkyCrow, as I always am, and I am, or was, playing Rahua the Konrasu Cleric. You can find me over at Twitch, at TwitchTV forward slash HulkyCrow. You can find me on BlueSky and the Forbidden website by the same username, as well as on Tumblr and Discord. Don't be shy. Then we got a speaker. Hi, everybody, I'm going to be a speaker. You can find me on BlueSky, and, uh, you can find me there, as, as, as, as, as, as, as speaker D. Um, and, uh, you can also find me on Arrakis. My desert. Yeah, if you find us in Dune, come say hi. Of course, we also have SaltyJob. Where can they find you? Yeah, you can find me at SaltyJob on any, on all platforms. I'm a little funny variety streamer. I do art most of the time. If you want to see cool behind-the-scenes stuff and whatever for this kind of show, maybe sometimes I'll give you some cool work-in-progress things. Who knows? Probably not. But I can show you cool art, at least. Uh, yeah, that's me. I've been playing Snot. She's a goblin. Thurston, where can they find you? Hey, you can find me at all the things on Call GM. Um, I'm gonna, you know, I'm gonna be out for, like, two weeks now, uh, which is dating this episode a bit, but just so you know, for live people who, like, watch this live. Um, uh, because, you know, there's, there's, there's stuff. I'm going on some trips right now, so I'm looking forward to that. But yeah, all the things on Call GM. I love your face, everybody. And I have been your host for this evening. I am Zoran the Wizard, playing Oren. You can find everything about me at ZoranTheWizard.com. Hopefully, you can come over to the YouTube channel or the Twitch streams whenever I do stream, and come say hi. It's really nice to have company when I do so. And with that, we are going to be leaving you all. Everyone, please keep it easy. Please stay safe. And we'll see you all next time with RotRind. Goodbye. Goodbye. Hi. Yay. Yay, baby. . Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.