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A License to Have a Child! · Armstrong & Getty One More Thing

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: You should need a license to have a child. It's
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: one more thing.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: Armstrong and Getty. One more thing. I'd be happy to
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: run the Department of Child Licensing, too. Requires a personal interview.
• 0:17
  Speaker 3: I learned, at least in, it's not true in every state,
• 0:20
  Speaker 3: but in California, you're not even required to parent your child.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: That's not a law. You don't have to. Nobody can
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: make you. So you can, like, turn them loose in
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: the forest? Have them be raised by wolves or raccoons
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: or whatever.
• 0:36
  Speaker 3: I think you'd have to give them to somebody else. But, like,
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: divorce situations or whatever, you can't. But she doesn't do
• 0:42
  Speaker 3: this or that. They're not required to do anything. Or
• 0:45
  Speaker 3: he doesn't do this or that.
• 0:46
  Speaker 4: I mean, you're a full-time dad.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: Yes, I am.
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  Speaker 3: I'm 100%.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: God bless you for that. Okay.
• 0:53
  Speaker 3: I ain't got time for this because I'm a full-time dad.
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: So what are you about to tell us?
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 0:59
  Speaker 4: So this clip we're about to play, it didn't, I, I,
• 1:03
  Speaker 4: this has been a trend for a little while. And
• 1:05
  Speaker 4: the first time I saw it was pre-mom. And now
• 1:08
  Speaker 4: that I am a mom, it's infuriating.
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: Is this an online trend?
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: This is an online trend where.
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: They already hate it.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: I know. If you're baking with your child.
• 1:22
  Speaker 4: You crack the egg on your child's forehead without telling them.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: And it sounds like this.
• 1:29
  Speaker 3: You ready?
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: Can I crack it now?
• 1:37
  Speaker 4: Ow!
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: That hurts! Let's crack this one.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: Ow!
• 1:44
  Speaker 4: Ow!
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: Ow! I have never raised my hand against a woman
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: and never will. I would slap each and every one
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: of those ladies.
• 1:57
  Speaker 4: And I'll be right behind you to follow it with
• 1:59
  Speaker 4: a double because that's awful.
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: At least in one case, it sounded like a baby.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: They're all under the age of four.
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: They're all toddlers. You effing monsters. You're that desperate for
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: online approval. God, I despise you. Maybe a chokehold. I
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: don't know. That's not striking a woman. I'll let you
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: do the business, Katie. I should stop saying things like that.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: Hanson, bleep. I'll just beat the shit out of all
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: of them. I don't care.
• 2:29
  Speaker 4: And when you watch the child– so these moms, what
• 2:32
  Speaker 4: they do is they're like baking and the kid's like
• 2:34
  Speaker 4: right next to them and then they just.
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: Bop, like right in the face.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah. The physical pain is great, but the betrayal is
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: even better. The betrayal of your trust as a mother.
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: At least it's for a good reason.
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: You got some attention online.
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: But all the.
• 2:48
  Speaker 4: Babies and Joe, exactly what you're saying. All the babies
• 2:51
  Speaker 4: look at their mom like.
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: Why'd you do that? Yeah.
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: Why'd you do that to me?
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: Why would you hurt me when I trusted you? Well, that'll.
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: Have some ramifications for many, many years.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Oh, and not only will it have ramifications, but
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: it's on the Internet.
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  Speaker 4: So when they're in high school, their friends can go
• 3:08
  Speaker 4: back and see their mom slapping an egg into their head.
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: Is it just like a divide? You're either the sort
• 3:12
  Speaker 3: of person that really needs online approval. Maybe it's unfair
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: to say. I got a radio show all.
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: Across the country. Oh, we're going to start being fair now?
• 3:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: I quit.
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: So I get plenty of attention, but I just can't
• 3:26
  Speaker 3: imagine like nobody in my family's that way. I don't
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: have any family members that need to be online getting
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: likes all the time.
• 3:35
  Speaker 4: And maybe it's rare and that's why it's a thing that,
• 3:39
  Speaker 4: you know, it popped up in the news, but either way,
• 3:42
  Speaker 4: like when your child looks at you with that look
• 3:45
  Speaker 4: of like, mom, why did you do that? And then
• 3:48
  Speaker 4: runs away crying. If that doesn't break your heart and God,
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: And even after that happens, you post it on the internet.
• 3:58
  Speaker 4: Like you go a step further.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: Good point. The only reason.
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: So it wasn't your, and that's a good point. So
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: it wasn't a man was my judgment wrong there. I
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: shouldn't have done that. That was a big mistake I made. No,
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  Speaker 3: you know, I'm going to post this.
• 4:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Right. Wow.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: Gross.
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: Putting that sort of positive reinforcement of getting likes or
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: laughs or whatever. Ahead of your child? I just.
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: But here's the problem with social media.
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: Send them to me. I'll raise them. It's going to
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: be a laissez-faire arrangement, all right? A free range. I'm
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: an old guy. It's going to be beyond free range.
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: Here's 50 bucks. Make it last you the next three days.
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: But I'll be a better dad than you are a mom, you...
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: dumb bitches make it last.
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: Three days.
• 4:49
  Speaker 4: But also here's the problem right so you put this
• 4:52
  Speaker 4: on social media so let's say facebook instagram whatever even
• 4:58
  Speaker 4: the people that are commenting oh you you bitch you
• 5:01
  Speaker 4: shouldn't be a mom blah blah blah they're getting engagement
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  Speaker 4: so they're getting paid because if people even if they
• 5:07
  Speaker 4: don't like the video and they go to comment and
• 5:10
  Speaker 4: call these people horrible mothers as they should These moms
• 5:15
  Speaker 4: are getting paid for these videos because of the content engagement.
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: It's hard to say which is more horrifying, rage baiting
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: for profit by abusing your child or being so desperate
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: for approval you abuse your child. Difficult to pick a fave.
• 5:33
  Speaker 4: So that somewhat leads into my other topic. It's called
• 5:39
  Speaker 4: trauma posting.
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, yeah. Whatever happened to the ice bucket challenge? Right.
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: Those were more innocent times. Whatever happened to ice cream socials? Right.
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: That's the way you meet people. Get engagement.
• 5:56
  Speaker 4: A lot of quote-unquote influencers, I call them that loosely
• 6:00
  Speaker 4: because they're not influencing anything other than crap, but they've
• 6:04
  Speaker 4: been doing this thing where... Something terrible is happening in
• 6:09
  Speaker 4: their life, right? And I don't know if you guys
• 6:11
  Speaker 4: have been on Facebook and seen someone say, like, please
• 6:15
  Speaker 4: send thoughts and prayers. Can't elaborate, but just need them.
• 6:22
  Speaker 3: I have seen that. That's funny that you bring this up.
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: I saw one of those sometime in the last couple
• 6:28
  Speaker 3: of weeks and thought, that's weird.
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: I wonder what the heck that is.
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: So it's trauma engagement.
• 6:34
  Speaker 4: So what they're trying to do is get a bunch
• 6:36
  Speaker 4: of people to be like, oh, my God, what's wrong?
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: Oh, we're praying for you. Oh, and then they get paid.
• 6:42
  Speaker 3: Got to admit, I did wonder what's wrong.
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: I mean, it wasn't somebody that I bring them along
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: with like cliffhangers. Yeah.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: And so they repeatedly post. So thank you for the prayers.
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: I think they're working.
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: But.
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: But you're still not telling me what I'm praying for.
• 6:57
  Speaker 4: Right. And they keep going. And they've I mean, I
• 7:00
  Speaker 4: saw this one. That's the only reason I text message
• 7:03
  Speaker 4: you guys about this was because this one particular girl
• 7:05
  Speaker 4: that I follow has been going through some form of
• 7:09
  Speaker 4: just family catastrophe for about three and a half weeks.
• 7:14
  Speaker 4: And she posts every day about it. And I see
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: every post and I could not be paid to tell
• 7:21
  Speaker 4: you what the hell is going on because I have
• 7:23
  Speaker 4: no idea.
• 7:24
  Speaker 3: So on that one, if it's purely a grift, if
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: it's just, this is the world we live in. There's
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: a bunch of people out there that are going to
• 7:32
  Speaker 3: go for this. I've figured out a way to get clicks.
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: You don't have.
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: To fall for it. What they're going through is probably
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: they lost custody of their child because they're cracking eggs
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: on their heads.
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: There you go.
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: And good. Yeah. But I mean, all of these crack
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: an egg on your head. Oh, it's a rock. Sorry.
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: I can never keep straight. Which ones are eggs and
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: which are rocks. Sorry. My bad.
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: Uh, anyway, I don't know.
• 8:00
  Speaker 4: It's just this, this particular woman I've, I've been following
• 8:04
  Speaker 4: this for three and a half weeks and I've seen
• 8:05
  Speaker 4: like four video selfie videos, crying one in the car.
• 8:09
  Speaker 4: And she was apparently quote unquote, Outside of a police
• 8:12
  Speaker 4: station screaming at the cops, but we never saw.
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: The police station.
• 8:16
  Speaker 4: And all these people, I mean, she's getting probably 3,000
• 8:19
  Speaker 4: comments a post.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: And she's making buku dollars.
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: Wow, wow, wow.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: I don't like the world we're in.
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: I'll not be, oh, I despise it. I will not
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: be abusing any children, but there are so many grifts.
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: You know, I'm a reasonably... creative fellow, surely I can
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: come up with a grift that I can still sleep
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: at night.
• 8:43
  Speaker 3: So I agree, and you would be a better parent
• 8:46
  Speaker 3: than those other people, but that is a good plan
• 8:49
  Speaker 3: for a kid. Here's $ 50. Make it last for three days.
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: Inflation, I don't know how good a figure that is.
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: I'm not sure $ 50 would get you very far. Don't
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: go to the movies.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: It won't take care of the whole bill.
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: Well, no, you're teaching them budgeting. Surely they can feed
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: themselves on $ 50 for three days. Sure, sure, sure. All right.
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: So let's say 120 bucks a week. Come on. You
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: got to do back to school shop and talk to me.
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: We can probably work something out.
• 9:15
  Speaker 3: Oh my gosh. I should talk about this on the,
• 9:17
  Speaker 3: I should talk about this on the radio show. Cause
• 9:19
  Speaker 3: I don't know how other parents do it in the,
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: in the modern world like this. Cause I was going
• 9:23
  Speaker 3: through the whole, my kids are teenagers now and it was,
• 9:25
  Speaker 3: I'm going to the movies with my, my friends. Can
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: you know, will you give me 20 bucks to blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 9:30
  Speaker 3: So it's, you know, constantly that. And I finally just,
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: I put my card on my credit card on their
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: phones just so, cause I don't carry cash. I don't
• 9:39
  Speaker 3: carry cash very often, so it's just easier. So now
• 9:43
  Speaker 3: they both have their phones, so they can just ding, ding, ding, ding,
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: ding wherever they're at and pay for things. So I've
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: got to constantly go in there and, hey, whoa, what
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: was this?
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: Wow. Well, I get it.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: Are you adopting? I'm up for adoption.
• 9:59
  Speaker 4: Yeah. I'd like to be on that card.
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: My limit is fairly low, but. What's that three-digit code there?
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry. What's the expiration date?
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: I suppose maybe I ought to get a different card
• 10:11
  Speaker 3: and then like lower. I don't think this would happen,
• 10:14
  Speaker 3: but the, There's always a chance to get their phone
• 10:16
  Speaker 3: stolen or something. Anyway, just thinking it through, I say,
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: you know, I better not see first-class tickets to France
• 10:21
  Speaker 3: on here at the end of the day or something.
• 10:24
  Speaker 4: They can download an app like Venmo or something like that,
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: and then Venmo now has a card that parents can
• 10:30
  Speaker 4: load cash onto.
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: That's what I should probably do. And they can go
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: beep that.
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: It's just, you know. Yeah, debit card, right?
• 10:36
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I should do that, but. I just don't want
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: to have the hassle. I got enough going on. I
• 10:41
  Speaker 3: don't need to refresh it or this and that. But
• 10:43
  Speaker 3: you know how your credit card limit can grow over years?
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: Where'd you get the car? You know, that sort of thing.
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: Give them $ 20 each.
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: Well, since inflation, $ 20.
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: Doesn't do much. That doesn't get you anything.
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: Nothing. You're not going to a movie. A $ 20 bill
• 11:05
  Speaker 4: is like a $ 5 bill used to be. Yeah, and
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: 100 is like a 20.
• 11:09
  Speaker 3: Yep, exactly right. Huh. Oof, that hurt.
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: Good stuff.
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: All right, 25. Well, I guess that's it.