Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 3 - Episode 111 - Are you a RIGID thinker?

Transcript

Season 3 - Episode 111 - Are you a RIGID thinker? · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

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  Welcome to the Good Morning from the Chicken Coop podcast with
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  Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and mastermind set
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  coach. Filled with inspiration,
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  distinctions, perspectives, and possibilities, we help you to
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  cultivate a mindset that leads you to create the best version
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  of yourself you could ever imagine.
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  Join Kim every morning from one of her favorite happy places,
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  her chicken coop, along with all her chickens.
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  Hey everybody, good morning from the chicken coop where the girls
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  are currently enjoying bananas and shredded zucchini and squash
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  and some hot Peppers because they seem to really like hot
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  Peppers. So this morning we are talking
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  about rigid thinking. So why did I mention the chicken
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  food this morning and rigid thinking?
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  Because a lot of people think that you can't give chicken
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  certain things or wow, I didn't know chickens could do that.
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  And or they'll say, Oh well when they see what my chickens eat,
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  they'll say, well you shouldn't do that and you shouldn't do
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  this. And I always laugh because
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  that's rigid thinking. And we have to recognize that
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  this shows up in the smallest of small places within us.
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  We hear something, we do something a certain way, and
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  that becomes the way it always is.
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  And we don't change our way of thinking.
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  We don't account for new information, We don't account
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  for new ways of thinking. We just stick with the
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  information we have and we run with it.
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  And then that becomes our reality.
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  And when we run into somebody that has different thinking, we
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  often become super rigid about our thinking without considering
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  whether that still serves us or not.
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  So today's podcast is all about do these things serve us?
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  So when you start to have rigid thinking and believe me, you,
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  you all have it, we all have it. We can't get away from it.
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  It's just how we are, how we will say, well, that's how I was
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  raised, or this is the way my, my grandparents taught me, or
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  this is what I, I learned in school, or this is what a
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  professor, my, one of my favorite professors showed me to
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  do it this way, whatever it might be, doesn't matter.
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  What matters is that there's no room for consideration in other
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  possibilities. There's no room to look at it a
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  different way and say, huh, could this work a certain way?
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  Could this be perceived another way?
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  We ran into this the other day in our household and we have a
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  sink in our garage, one of the big utility sinks.
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  And I was purging, cleaning, getting rid of things and on the
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  top shelf of a rack in our garage, my husband has a saw, a
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  big like, I want to say it's a skill saw, but I'm, this is so
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  not my skill set, no pun intended.
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  And it was, it's a big saw that kind of like comes down with an
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  arm. I don't know what it's called,
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  but this is, it's a big saw and it's on the top shelf.
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  So I said to him, why do you have it on the top shelf?
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  Can't you put it on another shelf?
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  And he said it doesn't fit. It doesn't clear.
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  And I said, it's so it's so hard up there.
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  It's like so hard for you to reach up and get it down.
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  Why don't you put it on under the sink?
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  And he says it's not going to fit.
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  And I say I'm standing there and I'm looking at it and I'm like,
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  no, it's going to fit. It could fit under the sink.
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  He's like, it's not going to fit under the sink him.
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  And I'm like, no, it'll really fit under the sink mark.
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  And I'm looking at it. Now, mind you, my husband is
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  Uber auditory and I am Uber visual so I can measure.
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  And I was raised by a man who was a contractor, and I have
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  like the unbelief. And he was a master Carpenter.
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  So I was like, constantly taught to measure things, look at
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  things, see things. So here I am looking at it, and
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  in my mind, I can see that, yes, there's a pipe under the sink,
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  but there's also a shape of the saw and it can slide right in.
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  So we start having this conversation.
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  Now, mind you, this would have been easily solved except my
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  husband was in the rigid moment. And he looks at it and he says,
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  it's not going to work. And I'm standing there and I'm
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  trying not to be that woman. And I'm going, no, it's really
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  going to work. I'm telling you it's going to
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  work. And so he says it's just not
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  going to work. Why can't you let it go?
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  You're relentless. Well, that is true.
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  I am relentless. But I couldn't let it go because
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  I knew it would work. So I said, OK, so he went to go
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  do something else. And I proceeded to put the saw
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  under the sink. And when he walked back in, I
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  said, look, it fits under the sink.
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  And there was a moment, and you could see it in his face, where
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  there was a moment where he was like irritated with me and proud
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  of me at the same moment. One, that I didn't give up and
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  that I made it work for him. And two, that like, geez, she's
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  freaking relentless. So this is where rigid thinking
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  catches us. Instead of in that moment, he
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  could have said to me, hey, you know what?
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  Let's just give it a shot and see.
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  But he didn't because he was sticking with what he came up
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  with. I could have backed off and
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  walked away, but I was rigid as well.
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  This is not just about him being rigid.
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  This is about me being rigid in my relentlessness.
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  It shows up all the time and in the most finite of situations.
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  So imagine how it shows up in what we believe about life or
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  what we believe is right and wrong.
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  Oh my God, that that is one that will send us right down a rabbit
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  hole. So I'm asking you not to give up
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  that piece of yourself because that would be silly.
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  We can't give these things up. Like I've said a million times,
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  you can't throw emotions off the bus.
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  You can't throw these things off the bus because they're there.
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  But what you can do is challenge them.
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  And you can ask yourself, how can I see this differently?
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  Is there another way for me to do this?
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  And the dreaded question that I can't stand asking myself, but
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  do it often. Am I being rigid?
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  Because sometimes more often than I like to think, I am being
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  rigid? Yes.
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  Let me be a total confession right now.
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  I'm rigid when it comes to loading my dishwasher.
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  I'm rigid when it comes to folding my towels.
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  I'm rigid when it comes to organizing my closets.
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  Yes, yes, yes, yes. And am I going to change it?
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  No. But you know why that's OK?
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  Because I've made the declaration, the proclamation.
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  I've gone out there. I've said this is the way it is
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  and this is how it's going to stay, and I don't put it on
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  anybody else. They can put the dishes in the
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  dishwasher the way they need to. If I want to reorganize them,
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  that's on me and I'm OK with that.
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  So it's all about making space for other people.
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  It's all about making space for yourself.
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  It's all about staying not quite so rigid in your thinking that
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  you cause yourself stress because that's where it really
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  comes from. And that's what this is all
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  about. So go out there today, figure
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  out if you're too rigid and how to just tweak that a little tiny
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  bit. And I hope you guys have a very
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  blessed day and I will see you tomorrow.
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  Bye.