Latest / Vanity Farah with Chris Farah / Love After Lockup Relationship Rehab Season 1 Episode 1 "Walls Within Walls"

Transcript

Love After Lockup Relationship Rehab Season 1 Episode 1 "Walls Within Walls" · Vanity Farah with Chris Farah

0:03
Speaker 1: Hi, everyone.
0:06
Speaker 2: My name is Chris Farah, and welcome to Vanity Fair,
0:09
Speaker 2: or if you're watching on YouTube, hi. It's me. I'm
0:12
Speaker 2: on both places. I'm in your microphone and your speakers,
0:17
Speaker 2: and I'm also, you know, just straight up in your face. Hi.
0:21
Speaker 2: Guess what? I love to talk about pop culture and
0:23
Speaker 2: do TV recaps, and today is like a day that
0:26
Speaker 2: is no other because I'm premiering a brand new show.
0:29
Speaker 2: Because guess what? There's a brand new show. It's everything
0:33
Speaker 2: we love, people we already love, formats we already love.
0:36
Speaker 2: And I'm going to tell you right now, it's great.
0:39
Speaker 2: So please put your hands together for Love After Lockup, honey.
0:43
Speaker 2: It's come. It's relationship rehab. This is season one. It's
0:46
Speaker 2: going to be like, you know, at least season 25
0:49
Speaker 2: at some point. Episode one, it's called Walls Within Walls.
0:52
Speaker 2: And let's talk about it. So listen, from the people
0:55
Speaker 2: they bring us... 90 Day Fiance, which is a show
0:58
Speaker 2: I cover. They bring us love after lockup, love during lockup,
1:02
Speaker 2: and all of that, which has become a whole thing.
1:03
Speaker 2: And now we have seminal couples and those seminal couples
1:07
Speaker 2: that we have grown to love, just like everyone have
1:09
Speaker 2: problems and the problems we even know about because God bless,
1:13
Speaker 2: there are situations where people have been in jail and
1:16
Speaker 2: whatnot we know. So having said that, and I will
1:21
Speaker 2: say this, even though the format of a Last Resort
1:27
Speaker 2: or any other show where there is couples coming that
1:31
Speaker 2: we know from reality shows and then having to do
1:34
Speaker 2: counseling on camera, there can be differing degrees of like
1:40
Speaker 2: authenticity or degradation. Like, you know, listen, I didn't cover
1:45
Speaker 2: Last Resort. That just happened because I felt like there
1:47
Speaker 2: was like a scuminess about it. And I don't want
1:49
Speaker 2: to see like people have to be like, I'm trying
1:51
Speaker 2: to save my marriage. So here's a BDSM dungeon. Like
1:53
Speaker 2: that wasn't for me. I was like, oh, God bless.
1:56
Speaker 2: So when I tell you that I've watched four episodes
1:59
Speaker 2: of this so far and it's phenomenal, listen to me.
2:04
Speaker 2: I know what I'm talking about, but also thank you
2:06
Speaker 2: so much for being here. Hi. So listen. You can
2:09
Speaker 2: watch it on WeTV. It's called, again, Love After Lockup
2:13
Speaker 2: Relationship Rehab. And it has Dr. Ish. Dr. Ish, I guess,
2:17
Speaker 2: had done like marriage bootcamp reality stars, which I had
2:20
Speaker 2: never seen. I had no... So, okay. So I'm going
2:23
Speaker 2: in blind is what I'm telling you, okay? Except that
2:26
Speaker 2: I know all the couples, obviously. And the couples we're
2:29
Speaker 2: going to talk about, it's billed as five couples in
2:32
Speaker 2: eight days. So I was like, oh, that's so interesting.
2:34
Speaker 2: It's only eight days. Like I thought it'd be for
2:36
Speaker 2: some reason longer. And yet... The filming of it seems
2:40
Speaker 2: to be like an episode a day and there is
2:44
Speaker 2: drama in it. And it comes from incredibly organic, real, deep, vulnerable,
2:51
Speaker 2: raw moments that these lovely cast members are giving us.
2:56
Speaker 2: And also the production team slash Dr. Rish or the
3:00
Speaker 2: format of the show is like delivering on. And the
3:04
Speaker 2: editing and everything is not pushing. So it's all of that.
3:07
Speaker 2: Or it doesn't need it. I can't even tell you.
3:09
Speaker 2: Can you tell my fan? Here are the five couples.
3:11
Speaker 2: It's Brittany and Marcelino, who we know. Brittany had been incarcerated.
3:15
Speaker 2: She came out. You know her. I'm going to put
3:17
Speaker 2: up the couples, honey. Let's get into them. So Brittany
3:22
Speaker 2: and Marcelino, you see she has a son, Gio. Of course,
3:26
Speaker 2: they get married. She becomes a real estate person. They
3:30
Speaker 2: have children together. And The streets have said that they
3:34
Speaker 2: have filed for divorce. That had happened before the show premiered,
3:37
Speaker 2: but maybe like two months ago. So that's them. Now,
3:41
Speaker 2: we also know Alexis and Julius. Now, Julius came on
3:44
Speaker 2: in a whole ass thropple, you know, like a Gigi
3:46
Speaker 2: Bonita situation, okay? But that person's gone. He is with
3:50
Speaker 2: Alexis and they have a whole child together. He has
3:54
Speaker 2: like a very strong jaw. He, yeah, like she... unfortunately
4:02
Speaker 2: feels insecure around him and he doesn't try to not
4:07
Speaker 2: act aloof and nonchalant. Like such is the generation, but
4:11
Speaker 2: he does it. You know what I'm saying? Kimberly and
4:14
Speaker 2: Joey are over there. We know Joey, God bless, has
4:16
Speaker 2: been incarcerated and he has dealt with addiction issues. And
4:20
Speaker 2: he's also like from the South and has a draw,
4:22
Speaker 2: like nobody's business. And Kimberly has two children, honey. And
4:25
Speaker 2: he has moved in with the children and like raises them. Okay.
4:28
Speaker 2: So then we know On the bottom, we have Melissa
4:31
Speaker 2: and Louie. How could you not say Louie like that?
4:34
Speaker 2: I'm not even from the East Coast. I'm like Melissa
4:36
Speaker 2: and Louie. So obviously Melissa and Louie knew each other
4:40
Speaker 2: in high school. He was incarcerated and then she was
4:42
Speaker 2: obsessed with him. And then she like, he came out
4:44
Speaker 2: and then she kind of like is a little mean
4:46
Speaker 2: to him and also... I guess, I don't know. She
4:50
Speaker 2: is a hard to please woman. However, she is also
4:53
Speaker 2: hard to please for herself. She got a nose job.
4:55
Speaker 2: But she actually got a nose job. She didn't get
4:57
Speaker 2: a super small nose, which I appreciate for her. And
5:00
Speaker 2: then last but certainly not least, we have Justine and Michael.
5:03
Speaker 2: They're also from the East Coast, but they relocated to
5:06
Speaker 2: Las Vegas. He was incarcerated and she worked with his
5:09
Speaker 2: mom and she was a nurse. I don't know if
5:12
Speaker 2: she's still a nurse. She had a bunch of kids.
5:13
Speaker 2: He had some kids. And honey, when they came out,
5:15
Speaker 2: they were all booed up. They have an iconic opening
5:17
Speaker 2: when they first get together because she was wearing a
5:19
Speaker 2: onesie and it came out in a hot ass card.
5:22
Speaker 2: And I'm basically saying everything that I talked about because
5:24
Speaker 2: guess what? Your girl, Chris, is going to be able
5:27
Speaker 2: to have a little footage because she got to interview
5:30
Speaker 2: Justine and Michael and Dr. Ish, which is not why
5:33
Speaker 2: I'm doing the show because I wouldn't be able to
5:35
Speaker 2: do a show unless I liked it. And I love
5:36
Speaker 2: this show. So they are back and we get to
5:40
Speaker 2: talk to them. And you might remember she- Named a
5:43
Speaker 2: child Manhattan Barbie. Okay. So like I said, five couples,
5:48
Speaker 2: eight days. Let's get in. Okay. So we see Dr.
5:59
Speaker 2: Ish is a very well-dressed gentleman. Okay. Prominent psychiatrist and
6:06
Speaker 2: works with men, but also I guess in that, I
6:10
Speaker 2: wonder what his, I should have asked him more about
6:12
Speaker 2: his background in like doing work with incarcerated folks. I
6:19
Speaker 2: got to talk about in the first episode, we talk
6:22
Speaker 2: about a certain right. I'll get there and we'll talk
6:23
Speaker 2: about it. Just the proponent, the unfortunate probability that people
6:27
Speaker 2: return to prison and, But I only had a couple
6:31
Speaker 2: minutes and I had to get through, you know, I
6:32
Speaker 2: had like so much to talk about. So, but he
6:34
Speaker 2: dresses well, as we see. He wears this like fabulous
6:37
Speaker 2: pearl bracelet stack. Honey, I saw that pearl bracelet stack
6:40
Speaker 2: and I was like, where is that? Can I get that? Oh,
6:43
Speaker 2: I loved it. Pearls. I've gotten real into pearls. I mean,
6:46
Speaker 2: call me Jackie O. So we are going to pick
6:49
Speaker 2: up all the couples in their neighboring towns because we
6:52
Speaker 2: pick up on them getting ready and then coming to
6:55
Speaker 2: a hotel. Then from the hotel, they're going to go
6:56
Speaker 2: to the resort area, okay? So first and foremost, Ohio,
7:00
Speaker 2: Alexis and Julius, obviously. She says that in their life,
7:04
Speaker 2: communication's hard. And the situation is she feels like he...
7:12
Speaker 2: has cheated on her, and he feels like he hasn't.
7:16
Speaker 2: And it's because their versions of cheating are different definitions.
7:21
Speaker 2: And they're not going to only be the couple that
7:22
Speaker 2: deals with this. And I find that so interesting. Like,
7:26
Speaker 2: I think that in this world now, we have the
7:29
Speaker 2: concept of cheating and then emotional cheating. And the connotation,
7:35
Speaker 2: what I guess would be that cheating means like physical
7:37
Speaker 2: fucking cheating, like physical cheating, like you know, whatever that means.
7:42
Speaker 2: Some people would think that maybe a kiss isn't cheating
7:44
Speaker 2: and maybe that means like full sex, but I mean,
7:47
Speaker 2: that's one, that's crazy. Cheating is that. And then of course,
7:51
Speaker 2: emotional cheating is allowing yourself to be in an intimate, emotional, daily,
8:02
Speaker 2: or deep, complex, longing, yearning, desirable relationship with someone else,
8:12
Speaker 2: and maybe this relationship is secretive to your lover or
8:18
Speaker 2: the person you're with, or in some way fulfills you
8:24
Speaker 2: more and you feel shame about that because you now
8:26
Speaker 2: feel like you are more into or more indebted to
8:30
Speaker 2: or more excited about this person. It's a weird line, right?
8:34
Speaker 2: But Julius basically, I think just like, he says entertains
8:38
Speaker 2: or entertains the ideas of other flirty women. And we
8:43
Speaker 2: just don't know what the fuck that means. Like, I
8:47
Speaker 2: don't know if that means like, listen, if someone like
8:48
Speaker 2: is flirty, like in a DM, he's going to send
8:50
Speaker 2: a dick pic because like he entertains that. I don't
8:53
Speaker 2: know if he means if he's at a bar and
8:55
Speaker 2: a woman's like, I'll buy you a drink. He's like, yes,
8:57
Speaker 2: I'll get the drink and you can give me your number.
8:59
Speaker 2: I'm just going to entertain that. I don't know if,
9:02
Speaker 2: you know, a woman like shows him his tits and
9:04
Speaker 2: she's like, look at my tits. And he's like, let
9:06
Speaker 2: me entertain those tits with my tongue. I'm entertaining them. Anyway,
9:12
Speaker 2: some people might be like, Chris, do you have to
9:14
Speaker 2: be so vulgar? And I'll be like, yeah, I do.
9:17
Speaker 2: Because you can get your Christian podcast recaps of the
9:22
Speaker 2: show some other place. And it's not here. I'm talking
9:26
Speaker 2: about tits. So anyway, they go to that Cass hotel, honey.
9:29
Speaker 2: They're not there long. So then Melissa and Louie get
9:31
Speaker 2: their little opener. I'm so happy. She's packing and excited
9:35
Speaker 2: to get to therapy and fix the relationship. Now, when
9:37
Speaker 2: they do their intro, he's so cute. He's like, hi,
9:41
Speaker 2: I'm Louie. You know, and she's like, oh, don't say
9:43
Speaker 2: that last name. They don't say the last name. And
9:45
Speaker 2: it's true. And he's been on the show enough to
9:47
Speaker 2: be like, babe, do you ever say your last name?
9:50
Speaker 2: I wonder if when he's alone, he's been saying his
9:52
Speaker 2: last name the whole time and they just have to
9:53
Speaker 2: keep editing and cutting it right away. I wonder if
9:56
Speaker 2: I have to go back and if all his intros are, hi,
9:59
Speaker 2: I'm Louie. You know, that's a weird way to edit,
10:02
Speaker 2: but just pretend that I could, you know, make it work.
10:04
Speaker 2: So she's wearing this black choker and her confessionals with
10:07
Speaker 2: him that I'm like the half the time. I'm like,
10:09
Speaker 2: what is that? And also get rid of that. I
10:12
Speaker 2: don't need that. She wants to figure out like his
10:16
Speaker 2: mom situation. He's like, I don't, we don't need to
10:18
Speaker 2: figure out my mom situation. That is a moot point,
10:21
Speaker 2: a non-situation. We have to figure out us. She's like, well,
10:25
Speaker 2: I want to be number one. He's like, you are.
10:28
Speaker 2: She's like, not to her. And that's interesting because what
10:34
Speaker 2: does that mean? First of all, straight up.
10:39
Speaker 1: You can't make anyone do anything. And you can't make
10:44
Speaker 1: anyone think anything. You can't make anyone think that you're
10:50
Speaker 1: number one if they think they're number one.
10:53
Speaker 2: Period. Not moms. Especially not moms. Now, does she mean
10:59
Speaker 2: that she wishes he would have firmer boundaries when it
11:03
Speaker 2: came to decision making in situations where it was a
11:06
Speaker 2: Melissa versus mom thing? Maybe. And maybe that's more what
11:12
Speaker 2: she was aiming for because, girl, you don't make that
11:15
Speaker 2: mom think that you're number one. She hates you. We've seen. Okay.
11:24
Speaker 2: So anyway, when Melissa kind of like meets up because
11:30
Speaker 2: this is the other beautiful thing about the show, obviously.
11:31
Speaker 2: We get to see everyone hanging out with everyone, right?
11:33
Speaker 2: And these couples are great. Now, there are other great
11:36
Speaker 2: couples we surely would love to see, but that's not
11:39
Speaker 2: what's happening right now, and here we are. So Melissa
11:41
Speaker 2: and Louis know Alexis and Julius, so that's kind of exciting.
11:45
Speaker 2: Melissa's like, oh, here's the thruple, which is not, again,
11:48
Speaker 2: the Gigi Benita thruple. There's been so many iconic thruples
11:51
Speaker 2: on this show. That's not him. Remember that, Michael? Oh,
11:55
Speaker 2: God bless. Okay, so Um, Justin and Michael, we pick
12:00
Speaker 2: up on, they're leaving Las Vegas. Okay. For LA. That's
12:05
Speaker 2: like me, honey. Sad with sunglasses on on a Sunday.
12:09
Speaker 2: Get me like in a car for four and a
12:10
Speaker 2: half hours or on that quick Southwest right to Burbank.
12:18
Speaker 2: I'm not going to say anything. I'll get home in
12:20
Speaker 2: 20 minutes. Carry on. Okay. So listen, we know Justin
12:25
Speaker 2: and Michael, right? He is a rapper. She is a baddie.
12:30
Speaker 2: Baddie moms. They have nine kids together. And, you know,
12:34
Speaker 2: they have parenting differences because he was in jail for
12:38
Speaker 2: a whole ass time. And, you know, it makes you
12:44
Speaker 2: and it makes you survive a certain way. And you
12:46
Speaker 2: have to learn how to navigate that situation. And it
12:49
Speaker 2: instills in you certain blueprints and residue that it's hard.
12:52
Speaker 2: to transfer to different types of relationships, loving relationships, parental relationships,
12:57
Speaker 2: kid relationships, you know, romantic relationships, the ability to see
13:01
Speaker 2: and have empathy for people, sit with that, be okay.
13:03
Speaker 2: And then also like be vulnerable. It's just all of
13:06
Speaker 2: it's interesting, you know? And also like, if you were
13:12
Speaker 2: raised like by a strict parent to think about what people,
13:16
Speaker 2: you know, maybe be doing now, is different, especially if
13:19
Speaker 2: your strict parent was like, you know, ethnic and there's
13:21
Speaker 2: a lot of different tropes about that. Okay, so I'm
13:25
Speaker 2: not saying that, Michael. You know, I'm just saying like,
13:26
Speaker 2: there's different ideas of what it is to be strict
13:30
Speaker 2: and disciplinary in a parental household, right? Like across the line.
13:35
Speaker 2: My dad was, you know, had a beat with a
13:39
Speaker 2: belt buckle. He had three other brothers. His dad was
13:43
Speaker 2: a very good man, but it was also like a
13:44
Speaker 2: drunk bar owner. It was like the 1960s and 50s.
13:51
Speaker 2: I mean, I can't, my dad then had one child.
13:54
Speaker 2: It was me and my daughter. Thank God my dad
13:56
Speaker 2: never beat me. I mean, he never did, but like
13:59
Speaker 2: in the sense of, that shit's hard to like think about. Okay,
14:03
Speaker 2: so let's talk. As they descend out, Justine gives us
14:12
Speaker 2: full Honey Sandy, like in the last scene of Grease,
14:15
Speaker 2: you know, and he is like giving a nod with
14:18
Speaker 2: the leather jacket. We see it's like hip, it's like
14:20
Speaker 2: new age. You're the one that I want. Now she
14:26
Speaker 2: traveled with not only that onesie, but a whole ass
14:28
Speaker 2: stripper pole. I knew there were traveling stripper poles. It's
14:34
Speaker 2: just that I personally don't feel like I have ever
14:36
Speaker 2: been slight enough to trust a travel stripper pole. I
14:43
Speaker 2: can't talk. Stripper pole. Is that hard to say or
14:46
Speaker 2: just me? Stripper pole. Stripper pole. Um, anyway, I was watching,
14:56
Speaker 2: side note is I was watching like 30 Rock bits
15:00
Speaker 2: and I forgot about one time Jenna, Jenna Maloney, who obviously,
15:05
Speaker 2: you know, like Jane Krakowski's character gets cast in a
15:08
Speaker 2: movie is called The Rural Juror. And I mean, I
15:15
Speaker 2: just did every part of me. I muscled through saying
15:18
Speaker 2: that with every word. BA of theater arts. I have
15:21
Speaker 2: in my bones to say it, but like, it is
15:24
Speaker 2: wildly difficult to get your tongue on board. And I
15:29
Speaker 2: feel like a Chris Farah has a naturally lazy tongue.
15:32
Speaker 2: And then the California thing is a naturally lazy tongue,
15:35
Speaker 2: but to really think about what it takes to mouth words, honey,
15:41
Speaker 2: it's exhausting. Okay. So I would do my exercises. I'm
15:50
Speaker 2: That sounds so gross. Joey and Kimberly, listen, they're coming, honey.
15:55
Speaker 2: Since coming out of prison, he has, God bless, unfortunately
15:58
Speaker 2: relapsed and gone back to prison and then came out, relapsed,
16:01
Speaker 2: and then went to rehab. We know that Kimberly has
16:04
Speaker 2: two kids. They also knew each other prior to him
16:07
Speaker 2: going to prison. Also kind of a Melissa and Louie situation,
16:10
Speaker 2: a high school situation. And he has dealt with addiction
16:14
Speaker 2: his whole life. She has also dealt with trauma. Again,
16:18
Speaker 2: she had two kids previously. And he has moved in
16:21
Speaker 2: and is raising the kids. Now, one thing is when
16:24
Speaker 2: we see Joey, he doesn't look great. Now, Louie, on
16:33
Speaker 2: the other hand, looks incredibly clear-minded, incredibly vital. He is,
16:38
Speaker 2: I mean, very energetic. And he sort of clocks Joey
16:41
Speaker 2: looking worse for wear. So it's like... It's interesting because
16:48
Speaker 2: the way they clock it, it was like one of
16:49
Speaker 2: the first signs that I knew that this show was
16:51
Speaker 2: going to be special because they don't gloss over it.
16:54
Speaker 2: Like they don't pretend that's not happening. At the same time,
16:57
Speaker 2: it isn't like some immediate weird clocked out thing. Like, hey, Louie,
17:02
Speaker 2: you know, like it's not like Louie's not going to
17:03
Speaker 2: go up to Joey and be like forced to like
17:05
Speaker 2: be like, hey man, are you high right now? Or
17:06
Speaker 2: something crazy, right? Like, you know, the producers are like, yeah,
17:09
Speaker 2: do it Louie. And Louie isn't like trying to do that.
17:11
Speaker 2: Like everything feels way more organic and authentic. So that
17:15
Speaker 2: just is what is happening. So Brittany comes in and
17:19
Speaker 2: now kids are big kids. Now everyone has been at
17:22
Speaker 2: the hotel and they're basically like on a big van
17:25
Speaker 2: and they're watching people descend steps into the van. And
17:29
Speaker 2: so like, and as they do, they're like, oh, this
17:30
Speaker 2: is the couple and we know them. And oh, this
17:32
Speaker 2: is a couple, God bless. And so when Brittany comes down,
17:35
Speaker 2: arguably like one B-O-G, I mean, Justine and Michael, God bless,
17:38
Speaker 2: came after Brittany and Marcelino. Brittany comes down solo with
17:42
Speaker 2: thigh high boots and And she looks hot as hell, but,
17:44
Speaker 2: you know, alone. And then she walks and sits, and
17:47
Speaker 2: then Marcelino decides to walk out separately. They all drive
17:50
Speaker 2: in the van to, like, this beautiful retreat center that's
17:53
Speaker 2: very nature-y looking. And Justine and Michael recognize Dr. Ish
17:57
Speaker 2: because he, you know, obviously did some work on Marriage
18:00
Speaker 2: Family Boot Camp. And now I'm like, should I watch
18:03
Speaker 2: that show? Anyway. Now here's the thing. Michael gets triggered
18:07
Speaker 2: just being in the van because it's reminiscent, I guess,
18:10
Speaker 2: of transportation back when he was in prison. And Dr.
18:14
Speaker 2: Ish is a male, and so he has to have
18:17
Speaker 2: an obedience to male authority. Once they get there, they
18:22
Speaker 2: get off the bus van, and they hear their own
18:27
Speaker 2: voices in fights being projected around the camp. And at first,
18:31
Speaker 2: it's eerie. It's like, what's that? Is it like a doo-doo-doo? No,
18:34
Speaker 2: it's my voice from four years ago being like, fuck you.
18:38
Speaker 2: You don't ever know what's happening with me. You don't
18:40
Speaker 2: care about me. Why don't you do it? It's like, oh,
18:42
Speaker 2: that's me. I can't imagine if suddenly I was someplace
18:47
Speaker 2: and then my own crazy ass voice was being projected
18:51
Speaker 2: to me, which is weird that I wouldn't think about
18:55
Speaker 2: that because I'm literally doing a podcast right now. It
18:57
Speaker 2: could happen, but you know what I'm saying? Like in
18:59
Speaker 2: a heightened emotional state. which happens a lot in my
19:02
Speaker 2: own podcast. So again, it could happen. Okay. So Michael
19:07
Speaker 2: is antsy and Justine doesn't feel that, you know, that
19:11
Speaker 2: he is like very safe with her heart. He already
19:15
Speaker 2: is uncomfortable. You know, I wonder what the talking was
19:18
Speaker 2: for him to get, you know, on board for this.
19:20
Speaker 2: Joey and Kimberly, he says that he doesn't do bad.
19:23
Speaker 2: He doesn't do anything bad anymore. And currently they're like,
19:27
Speaker 2: you know, checking in with each couple as they go
19:29
Speaker 2: around and being like, what's happening? A little welcome. Joey
19:32
Speaker 2: and Kimberly are not having sex right now. Like it's
19:35
Speaker 2: been five months. He says she begs him to love her.
19:41
Speaker 2: But the thing is that he has a lot of fear,
19:43
Speaker 2: but he thinks that they're not going to make it.
19:45
Speaker 2: They right now have more of a bro-cis vibe. It
19:49
Speaker 2: feels like older cis that's trying to help a bro
19:51
Speaker 2: get through. And it also feels, and we'll get into
19:54
Speaker 2: this kind of mother-son. Joey thinks that sex is overrated.
20:02
Speaker 2: And I found that very interesting. And I wonder what...
20:08
Speaker 2: the idea of sex is for someone who has dealt
20:14
Speaker 2: with deep addiction. Because if you're going to think about
20:20
Speaker 2: like a dopamine center and getting like a dopamine hit,
20:23
Speaker 2: like the ways in which you do that, and then
20:26
Speaker 2: those ways are, guess what? Bling bling. Also the easy
20:31
Speaker 2: ways for you to get addicted, right? Like You can
20:35
Speaker 2: have a sex addiction because it's a dopamine hit. You
20:38
Speaker 2: can have an exercise addiction because it's a dopamine hit.
20:41
Speaker 2: You can have all the drugs, all the gambling, all
20:45
Speaker 2: the anything, you know, sitting at a Wheel of Fortune
20:48
Speaker 2: slot machine when you get to do the wheel is great.
20:55
Speaker 2: Being able, if you are this kind of person, to
20:58
Speaker 2: seduce someone like at a bar is And then feel
21:02
Speaker 2: like you are irresistible and then have them late at
21:05
Speaker 2: night or whatever in the early morning. And then either
21:10
Speaker 2: get pleasure or give them pleasure and feel like you're
21:13
Speaker 2: good at it. There's so many ways to get a
21:16
Speaker 2: hit of that, right? Having said that, I wonder if
21:20
Speaker 2: your neural pathways are used to one way, like a
21:23
Speaker 2: drug way. if it dulls the other ones. And so,
21:32
Speaker 2: and also he could also be asexual. Also, there could
21:38
Speaker 2: be unresolved trauma underneath it. Also, he could feel like
21:41
Speaker 2: he would not be able to perform for whatever reason.
21:43
Speaker 2: And therefore it's like a self-protection mechanicism that he like
21:47
Speaker 2: can't be either vulnerable or whatnot. There's so many layers
21:50
Speaker 2: to him saying that sex is overrated, but you know,
21:53
Speaker 2: it's my favorite topic. So when he said it, I
21:54
Speaker 2: was like clocking and talking. 45 minutes about it. So
21:57
Speaker 2: Michael thinks it's crazy that, you know, Joey doesn't want
21:59
Speaker 2: to have sex when he's upset because Michael assumes like,
22:01
Speaker 2: you know, men will fuck and be mad. Just seems
22:05
Speaker 2: like not every man is obsessed with sex. Michael's like,
22:12
Speaker 2: I'm making a face. The face was wildly big for
22:15
Speaker 2: being shocked and a how, um, But then, you know,
22:23
Speaker 2: it does... I guess if you... It would have to
22:25
Speaker 2: be like this. Were you fucking at one point, and
22:28
Speaker 2: this is less? Were you never fucking? Had sex always
22:32
Speaker 2: been overrated? You know, if you've been in prison for
22:35
Speaker 2: a long time, like, have you been doing other kind
22:38
Speaker 2: of sex stuff? And have you gotten used to that
22:40
Speaker 2: sex stuff? And then do you not want to talk
22:41
Speaker 2: about that sex stuff? And is this now sex stuff
22:43
Speaker 2: not as fun as the other sex stuff? Or do
22:45
Speaker 2: you feel ashamed about the other sex stuff? I mean,
22:47
Speaker 2: you know, there's just... I mean, there is so much
22:49
Speaker 2: to unpack with it.
22:50
Speaker 3: And.
22:51
Speaker 2: You know, I mean, my mind went there. Okay, so
22:55
Speaker 2: Melissa and Louie, their little check-in is that he thinks
22:58
Speaker 2: that she creates friction purposely. Like, he'll be like, look, babe,
23:03
Speaker 2: I can't find the hummus. She'll be like, you can't
23:04
Speaker 2: find the hummus? Well, have you tried opening the refrigerator?
23:07
Speaker 2: Have you tried even looking inside? Have you tried moving
23:09
Speaker 2: one or two things? Have you tried? I just want
23:11
Speaker 2: me to go in and stop what I'm doing, which
23:14
Speaker 2: is delivering mail, three other jobs to do this shit.
23:18
Speaker 2: You know, God bless. So... That's him. She thinks the
23:25
Speaker 2: problem is that his mom loves him unconditionally and that
23:32
Speaker 2: he has to learn that love is conditional. He must
23:36
Speaker 2: respect her to get love. Now that was very interesting too.
23:40
Speaker 2: Is love conditional? Should love be conditional? I mean like
23:44
Speaker 2: in yes and no conditional, you can't, yeah, you can't
23:48
Speaker 2: God bless. I mean, lie, cheat, steal, hurt, abuse people.
23:52
Speaker 2: Surely that is not, you know, then to me, unconditional
23:57
Speaker 2: love supposes that you are loving and starting with a
24:03
Speaker 2: person that loves themselves. And so the unconditional love is
24:07
Speaker 2: starting from a place and a person that loves themselves unconditionally.
24:12
Speaker 2: And then through that, they have the capacity to give
24:16
Speaker 2: that to someone, but If someone is hurting you in
24:22
Speaker 2: a way that you cannot tolerate for your own well-being,
24:28
Speaker 2: the love you have for yourself will make it so,
24:31
Speaker 2: you know, you can't. And also, unconditional love for someone
24:35
Speaker 2: else doesn't mean you giving them romantic love, intimate, you know,
24:42
Speaker 2: like you can have love for someone else. who's hurting
24:45
Speaker 2: you or has hurt you and then not have them
24:47
Speaker 2: in your life or distance yourself or be like, go
24:50
Speaker 2: get help. And I can't be with you until that.
24:52
Speaker 2: There's so many ways for that to look at. So great.
24:59
Speaker 2: Why do you have to fight so hard to be
25:01
Speaker 2: loved is what Melissa is like kind of asked because
25:03
Speaker 2: Melissa has a sort of tough exterior and the idea
25:08
Speaker 2: of this turmoil and or this constant yeah, hardness that
25:17
Speaker 2: like equates that love is being worked on or is
25:20
Speaker 2: really or there, you know, is it might be an
25:22
Speaker 2: interesting toxic trait because truly there is like all parts
25:26
Speaker 2: of a relationship is the good and the bad. But
25:31
Speaker 2: I think there's a way to also sit in, in
25:33
Speaker 2: the ease and peace and serenity of a long-term healthy
25:36
Speaker 2: relationship where two people know each other and care and
25:38
Speaker 2: love about each other, love about each other, love each other. Okay. Okay.
25:42
Speaker 2: She knows that she could be nicer. She knows that
25:44
Speaker 2: she's not affectionate. But it's hard for her to accept
25:47
Speaker 2: affection without being scared. And it requires a certain amount
25:51
Speaker 2: of vulnerability, I guess. And it's interesting because remember how
25:57
Speaker 2: we also had to deal with Marissa and Edward? If
25:59
Speaker 2: you listen to Vanity Fair, if you watch 90 Day Fiancé,
26:02
Speaker 2: that just happened the last season. There is a vulnerability there.
26:08
Speaker 2: for women to allow love in their lives and to
26:12
Speaker 2: be loved by a man that sometimes is overwhelming, you know, like,
26:17
Speaker 2: and you can see how people who have the, you know, the,
26:27
Speaker 2: I guess the propensity to get overwhelmed can shut down
26:31
Speaker 2: as they catastrophize what could be considered small moments of
26:35
Speaker 2: emotional vulnerability or feeling because I guess old residue makes
26:40
Speaker 2: those moments feel too scary to witness or to experience, right?
26:44
Speaker 2: That's why the show is so good and I love it. Okay.
26:47
Speaker 2: So Brittany and Marcelino, their check-in is that, you know,
26:49
Speaker 2: she says he was unfaithful. He says that he couldn't
26:52
Speaker 2: control her. He says his needs weren't met. He says
26:55
Speaker 2: a respectful wife needs to obey. Now, when he says that, Kimberly,
27:01
Speaker 2: everyone's like, I'm sorry, what? Now we're going to talk
27:03
Speaker 2: about the unfaithfulness. It deals with her friend who we
27:06
Speaker 2: know we watched this shit on happen on the show.
27:07
Speaker 2: And it kind of Goes back to that line of
27:11
Speaker 2: like cheating versus emotional cheating. We know that Marcelino obviously
27:17
Speaker 2: had adopted Gio, which was Brittany's child from before. And
27:22
Speaker 2: she says that he separated himself from Gio as well,
27:27
Speaker 2: which is emotionally devastating for that child who has only
27:30
Speaker 2: probably known Marcelino. He says, Marcelino says, women can't raise men.
27:40
Speaker 2: Which is crazy and wrong because there are a lot
27:46
Speaker 2: of men walking God's green earth that were just raised
27:50
Speaker 2: by women and they don't exhibit major amounts of toxic
27:57
Speaker 2: masculinity all the time. I'm giving them grace because there's,
28:00
Speaker 2: you know, everyone is toxic in their own ways and
28:02
Speaker 2: in moments. There are emotionally stable, empathetic, compassionate, kind, smart,
28:09
Speaker 2: successful men that were raised by women. And that's a
28:14
Speaker 2: crazy thing to say because unfortunately, there are so many
28:19
Speaker 2: men that were raised by single moms. Like the trope
28:25
Speaker 2: of being raised by a single dad is significantly less.
28:30
Speaker 2: Which is why when I say that I was raised
28:33
Speaker 2: by a single dad, I know it means something. Because
28:37
Speaker 2: historically moms, you know, like, and that, and my mom's
28:40
Speaker 2: still alive, you know what I'm saying? Like, that's another thing.
28:42
Speaker 2: It isn't like my mom is dead or anything, but
28:48
Speaker 2: men through whatever means just unfortunately tend to leave domestic
28:55
Speaker 2: situations on a more frequent basis. And it's just like
29:01
Speaker 2: a very overreaching, horrible comment to say, but he from
29:07
Speaker 2: a place of hurt, it feels like almost all of
29:11
Speaker 2: the time. Okay. So he also says that with Gio,
29:21
Speaker 2: Gio now is saying that he hates him. And we're
29:27
Speaker 2: going to get into Brittany having abuse situations and having
29:31
Speaker 2: had hit Marcelino. And so it's a really tricky subject
29:34
Speaker 2: because I think what is happening is Gio is, you know,
29:40
Speaker 2: in a rebellious stage, talking back to Marcelino, Marcelino is
29:43
Speaker 2: being overly critical. Brittany is taking that in and being like,
29:47
Speaker 2: stop being emotionally neglectful for my son, who is not
29:50
Speaker 2: your biological son. And so you're feeling some type of way.
29:53
Speaker 2: And at the same time, Marcelino feels like Brittany isn't
29:56
Speaker 2: obeying him. And therefore like he can't control her. And
29:59
Speaker 2: there's just a lot of things happening with them that like,
30:01
Speaker 2: doesn't feel great. It feels that they had already gotten
30:04
Speaker 2: in a lot of like toxic cycles before they got here. Um,
30:10
Speaker 2: Louis gives them a speech on how special this week
30:13
Speaker 2: is and how it's like great to get involved with
30:16
Speaker 2: the other couples. And it's adorable. His energy is vivacious.
30:19
Speaker 2: People love him. Like I said, okay, people are real,
30:22
Speaker 2: real down. Then Marcelina goes to lay down and Brittany
30:27
Speaker 2: comes out. He, you know, says like they aren't compatible.
30:30
Speaker 2: Joey and Michael talk about missing prison food, which prison
30:35
Speaker 2: food and what they used to cook and what they
30:38
Speaker 2: used to doctor is a whole ass thing. And it's
30:40
Speaker 2: like missing it, but also thinking it's gross, but also
30:43
Speaker 2: missing certain aspects. It's kind of like, I think, how
30:46
Speaker 2: I love Kraft macaroni and cheese. And it's something that
30:50
Speaker 2: I ate when I was young. And it's, I mean,
30:54
Speaker 2: I'm not saying it's prison food. but it's close, I'm assuming.
31:03
Speaker 2: Probably the closest thing I've eaten, like on a continual basis,
31:06
Speaker 2: just because, and again, I love it, but just like
31:08
Speaker 2: the simple act that it's like dried hydrogenated pasta and
31:12
Speaker 2: powder and you just add whatever they add to it,
31:15
Speaker 2: you know. All I know is I know that that
31:18
Speaker 2: taste can still taste good. Anyway, so they have this exercise,
31:21
Speaker 2: a cross the red line exercise, which basically is like
31:23
Speaker 2: a yes or no exercise. And it's like cross the
31:26
Speaker 2: line if it's a yes or no. If it's a yes,
31:28
Speaker 2: cross the line. If it's no, you can stay there.
31:29
Speaker 2: So They're like, okay, first question is who here has
31:32
Speaker 2: gotten arrested? And then all the people that we know
31:35
Speaker 2: step up and Kimberly steps up and Justine step up.
31:38
Speaker 2: And Kimberly says that she got arrested when she was
31:41
Speaker 2: 17 after being with some bad cats and her daddy
31:43
Speaker 2: got her picked up. And then when she got like,
31:47
Speaker 2: you know, when her dad picked her up, she like
31:49
Speaker 2: just confessed and tattletaled on everyone. Julia says he doesn't
31:55
Speaker 2: want to go back to the streets and selling drugs.
31:59
Speaker 2: But it's hard because all his friends are doing that.
32:01
Speaker 2: And Joey's like, yeah, that's why you have to get
32:03
Speaker 2: rid of them friends. Julius has a lot of like
32:09
Speaker 2: heart to be here. And you can see like this
32:11
Speaker 2: young guy fighting, which feels like probably a whole world
32:16
Speaker 2: and system and like set of friends that are like
32:18
Speaker 2: doing the exact opposite. And I can't imagine having to
32:26
Speaker 2: just be like, you have to change your entire friend circle.
32:30
Speaker 2: It would be like you'd have to move and change
32:32
Speaker 2: your number to a different town because you just, what,
32:35
Speaker 2: ignore people? Do they come and start talking to you?
32:37
Speaker 2: Do they start texting you? Do a bunch of people
32:39
Speaker 2: start showing up at your door? Do you lie and
32:44
Speaker 2: say you're going somewhere? I mean, I just, I don't know.
32:48
Speaker 2: It must be like so hard to really think about.
32:51
Speaker 2: You would have to, I'm assuming, like literally Julius would
32:54
Speaker 2: have to slowly stop calling people, change his number, just
32:58
Speaker 2: pretend that he is so, you know, daft that he
33:01
Speaker 2: like didn't send out, you know, new contact information. I
33:05
Speaker 2: think that he would have to join new third, what's
33:10
Speaker 2: it called? Third rooms? Third spaces. Third spaces. Thank you.
33:16
Speaker 2: That facilitate relationships. And these are, you know, platonic ones.
33:21
Speaker 2: Whether they're like, yeah, exercise or sports leagues or chess
33:26
Speaker 2: clubs or painting, blah, blah, you know, whatever it is,
33:30
Speaker 2: improv class, ha, ha, ha. But that is, you know,
33:33
Speaker 2: I think that if you are someone that needs to
33:37
Speaker 2: like change friends, I would see how that would be difficult,
33:41
Speaker 2: but that would be how I would have to do it. Honestly,
33:45
Speaker 2: moving would be a good idea. And I mean, just
33:47
Speaker 2: maybe even just like moving to a different city that's
33:50
Speaker 2: close by if you can, or a different part of
33:52
Speaker 2: town if it's a big part of town. Just because,
33:55
Speaker 2: especially if you have people that you think are going
33:56
Speaker 2: to like stop by, what a nightmare. So yeah, everyone,
34:03
Speaker 2: Joey's like, those aren't friends. Marcelino's like, get rid of
34:04
Speaker 2: those friends, Julius. And Julius, I'm also happy he's here
34:07
Speaker 2: because he is really young. And some of the other,
34:09
Speaker 2: you know, men here are older. And I feel like
34:12
Speaker 2: Julius might want and need kind of like some older
34:16
Speaker 2: male figures in his life. And so it makes me happy.
34:18
Speaker 2: I mean, Dr. Ish, truly, but even, you know, like
34:22
Speaker 2: Marcelino and Louis and Michael, I think that the propensity
34:29
Speaker 2: for these men and women, but let's just say men
34:33
Speaker 2: right now because of like Julius, for them to experience
34:36
Speaker 2: each other and watch each other break down, hate being vulnerable,
34:44
Speaker 2: fight it, and then have a win with it. And
34:48
Speaker 2: then have to watch another one do it and then
34:52
Speaker 2: experience the same pattern. It's just, it can be really
34:57
Speaker 2: validating that the human experience is universal and that the
35:01
Speaker 2: pain and uncomfortability you feeling that you feel is overwhelming.
35:05
Speaker 2: I know feels that way, but There's a certain peace
35:10
Speaker 2: that it's a universal feeling that other people hate that
35:13
Speaker 2: as much as you do. That sitting with that is
35:17
Speaker 2: as uncomfortable as other people can experience too. And having
35:22
Speaker 2: to watch someone be strong and do that and then
35:25
Speaker 2: come the other side and not disintegrate, not die, proverbially,
35:31
Speaker 2: I think is a win. So.
35:39
Speaker 2: Michael, you know, doesn't want to be there here at
35:43
Speaker 2: this time, this episode. Obviously he is very hard for
35:45
Speaker 2: this is having a, he's having a very hard time.
35:47
Speaker 2: He doesn't want to be here. He doesn't want to
35:49
Speaker 2: seem weak. He understands that are these exercises where you
35:52
Speaker 2: have to like open and dig deep. It requires a
35:55
Speaker 2: brutal bleeding honesty and it's tough work. And it's the
36:00
Speaker 2: deepest parts of you. Like, I mean, I understand that.
36:05
Speaker 2: The idea of having to give air, the things that
36:09
Speaker 2: you don't even want to think about in your own mind,
36:13
Speaker 2: the things that you do drugs to escape, the things
36:16
Speaker 2: that you eat to escape, the things that you fuck
36:18
Speaker 2: to escape, all of that, to then have to just
36:21
Speaker 2: lay bare with others and in camera? God bless. But
36:27
Speaker 2: the show is also going to talk about recidivism. Recidivism.
36:31
Speaker 2: Why can't I say? Recidivism. Recidivism. That's what it is.
36:36
Speaker 2: and I had just learned that word, which is why
36:38
Speaker 2: I can't say it, which again is the fact, and Dr.
36:41
Speaker 2: Ish says, 75% of formerly incarcerated people will go back
36:46
Speaker 2: to prison, will repeat, as a repeat offender is what
36:52
Speaker 2: people would say, would go back to prison though, in
36:55
Speaker 2: some sort of cycle. And one of the major ways
36:58
Speaker 2: in which to combat that statistic, which is overwhelming, which
37:01
Speaker 2: feels like almost a probability of just, it's going to happen,
37:06
Speaker 2: is being able to have a healthy, stable relationship. And
37:10
Speaker 2: I think that that also could be said in lots
37:14
Speaker 2: of ways. Yes, with someone. Yes, with yourself. And yes,
37:19
Speaker 2: like a home life in stable house, housing. And I
37:25
Speaker 2: think that having like a stability and a stable relationship
37:31
Speaker 2: with the world in itself means that you have purposeful,
37:38
Speaker 2: meaningful work that you contribute, that yes, also give you
37:43
Speaker 2: like a means to exist, that feed you in this
37:48
Speaker 2: way where like, it's the same, yeah, the relationship that
37:53
Speaker 2: you have with society and civilization, how you stand up
37:57
Speaker 2: to like, you know, how you stand up to what
38:02
Speaker 2: comes your way, I think that is like important. It's like,
38:06
Speaker 2: All of that is important, truly. But I think that
38:10
Speaker 2: the stability of having a home life, and if you
38:15
Speaker 2: have a really great therapist and you have good friends
38:19
Speaker 2: and you don't have a romantic relationship, God bless, maybe
38:21
Speaker 2: you have a dog and a cat and you have
38:23
Speaker 2: a great job. And a great job means that a
38:26
Speaker 2: job that you enjoy most of the time, that isn't
38:29
Speaker 2: always perfect, but that doesn't make you feel disrespected and
38:34
Speaker 2: less than that hopefully pays you a living wage that has,
38:39
Speaker 2: you know, if you're a creative person, an aspect that
38:44
Speaker 2: you can express yourself like that in. But how do
38:52
Speaker 2: you cultivate that if you have been in prison over
38:56
Speaker 2: and over again, plus you've dealt with a drug addiction
38:58
Speaker 2: and therefore you feel like you have been developmentally delayed
39:03
Speaker 2: and or you hold on to shame that keeps you
39:12
Speaker 2: being held back? Like, how do you deal with all
39:14
Speaker 2: of that? And still, you know, move through society in
39:20
Speaker 2: a healthy way and not go back to prison. Especially
39:25
Speaker 2: if you don't have any support like financially from people.
39:30
Speaker 2: or emotionally from people. And a lot of people don't, obviously.
39:34
Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, if you have no other means, this
39:37
Speaker 2: feels like a fucking jail sentence. It just feels like
39:42
Speaker 2: guilty as charged already. Like to get out of it
39:45
Speaker 2: requires a lot of work. But I think that creating
39:53
Speaker 2: stable relationships, again, and I know this is a romantic-based one,
39:59
Speaker 2: but I think that you can't control that as well
40:00
Speaker 2: as you can control the relationships you have, you know,
40:04
Speaker 2: hopefully with family, friends. By giving to those relationships like
40:10
Speaker 2: a vulnerable version of yourself that you feel, you know,
40:15
Speaker 2: aligns with who you want to be and your core
40:17
Speaker 2: values is it. And I think that we all deserve
40:22
Speaker 2: stable housing and meaningful, purposeful work that gives us a
40:29
Speaker 2: living wage. Those are like basic tenets. So I think
40:37
Speaker 2: that I'm so happy that we're talking about all of
40:39
Speaker 2: these things and I'm excited for The whole show as
40:42
Speaker 2: it progressed was a super teaser. It looks fabulous. Oh
40:45
Speaker 2: my God. It looks really, really, again, emotionally raw and
40:48
Speaker 2: it looks like important. I mean, it feels educational. It
40:54
Speaker 2: feels therapeutic. It feels healing to watch. It feels like
40:58
Speaker 2: there are barriers broken down where no matter where you
41:04
Speaker 2: come from, like social economic levels or whether you've been
41:08
Speaker 2: in prison or not or whatnot, whether you've dealt with
41:12
Speaker 2: drug addiction issues or not, or where you've stolen like
41:14
Speaker 2: all the therapy that they're doing and the connections that
41:19
Speaker 2: they're making is the kind of trauma work that like,
41:23
Speaker 2: I feel like we all need to sit with because
41:25
Speaker 2: no one talks about.
41:28
Speaker 3: How important it is to align what you're doing now
41:36
Speaker 3: with what has happened to you and how it affects
41:39
Speaker 3: other people.
41:42
Speaker 2: Like that kind of work helps everyone in every kind
41:45
Speaker 2: of relationship to see your patterns and to see how
41:49
Speaker 2: you come off and to like understand why and to
41:52
Speaker 2: understand your triggers, but then to understand like your beloved
41:56
Speaker 2: ones and to be able to sit in someone else's
41:59
Speaker 2: shoes and experience your relationship with them through their eyes.
42:04
Speaker 2: I mean, that's the kind of work that I think
42:05
Speaker 2: like makes us transcendent people, like evolves us in an
42:11
Speaker 2: emotionally mature way. And as a society, I don't even
42:14
Speaker 2: know what kind of entertainment is going to be able
42:16
Speaker 2: to do that for us. And I mean, I'm not
42:18
Speaker 2: saying this is a perfect one, but I'm saying I
42:20
Speaker 2: really enjoy it. Okay. All right, my loves, you can
42:24
Speaker 2: have more of me. It's completely true. First of all,
42:26
Speaker 2: you can give me money. I'd love that. It's at patreon.com
42:29
Speaker 2: where you get the visuals before anyone else. ad-free. And then, honey,
42:33
Speaker 2: I put them ads and I make them pups. So
42:36
Speaker 2: that happens, but there's also patron-only lives where I really
42:40
Speaker 2: listen and give the people what they want, and also
42:43
Speaker 2: personal information about me. All of that, patreon.com slash chrisferra.
42:47
Speaker 2: You can also follow me for free on social medias,
42:50
Speaker 2: and that's a free way for you and a great
42:52
Speaker 2: way for me to help. It's like engagement tickling, and
42:55
Speaker 2: I love being tickled. No. It's at Chris L. Farah
42:59
Speaker 2: on Instagram and on TikTok. I have a sub stack.
43:02
Speaker 2: I'm on Facebook, Chris Farah, and I have a private group,
43:04
Speaker 2: Vanity Farah on Facebook.
43:06
Speaker 3: Hi.
43:07
Speaker 2: Also, I'm on YouTube, Chris Farah. You can see my
43:09
Speaker 2: visuals there and I do lives. Also, if you haven't
43:12
Speaker 2: given a comment yet to Vanity Farah, the podcast you
43:16
Speaker 2: might be listening to, please do so. I really appreciate it.
43:19
Speaker 2: And share with a friend.
43:20
Speaker 3: All right.
43:21
Speaker 2: Those are all my things. Guess what I'm going to do?
43:22
Speaker 2: Breathe like I always do, honey. This is probably the
43:25
Speaker 2: first show where this makes sense for me to end
43:26
Speaker 2: every episode this way, but here we are. Why? Mindful meditation.
43:30
Speaker 2: It's important to be able to see how you're feeling
43:33
Speaker 2: to sit with yourself. And I mean, The first thing
43:36
Speaker 2: is to feel your body in space. You'd be surprised,
43:40
Speaker 2: and maybe you're not, how long and how often many
43:44
Speaker 2: people go without truly feeling themselves in the current present time,
43:51
Speaker 2: like checking in, like becoming viscerally aware in real time
43:58
Speaker 2: to the senses around them, to how the couch under
44:02
Speaker 2: them feels or the ground underneath their feet or their
44:05
Speaker 2: sit bones on a chair or the sound of whatever
44:09
Speaker 2: is in their room. Perhaps it's my voice. Perhaps you
44:13
Speaker 2: can listen to the sound of your own breath or
44:16
Speaker 2: feel your hand on your chest and the sensory of
44:18
Speaker 2: your chest opening, expanding and going down. Anything to be like,
44:23
Speaker 2: oh shit, I'm right here right now. It's a gift.
44:27
Speaker 2: Let's give it to ourselves. All right, two breaths out
44:30
Speaker 2: and out and So it's like that's how it goes.
45:00
Speaker 2: All right, babes, take care of yourselves and one another.
45:03
Speaker 2: Stand up for what you believe and make art. And
45:06
Speaker 2: I'm super excited to see you again. And yeah, check
45:09
Speaker 2: out the show, Relationship Rehab, honey. It is Fridays on
45:12
Speaker 2: WE tv and it's streaming. There's at least three episodes
45:15
Speaker 2: already out. Bye. Oh, did I say that? Take care
45:19
Speaker 2: of yourselves. I did. Take care of yourselves. Stand up
45:20
Speaker 2: for what you believe and make art. Okay, I don't know. Bye.