Latest / Math Therapy / What 3 viral trends tell us about math trauma in 2026

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What 3 viral trends tell us about math trauma in 2026 · Math Therapy

• 0:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: Crying over math has become this shared cultural experience in North America.
• 0:07
  Vanessa Vakharia: Can we think about that?
• 0:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: A, a shared cultural experience of crying over our math homework as children?
• 0:12
  Vanessa Vakharia: Why have we normalized that?
• 0:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: This reel has gone viral, this trend has gone viral not because it's, like, an especially clever joke, but because millions of people immediately recognize themselves in it, If the shirt said,"I'm too handsome to do math," it wouldn't be funny.
• 0:26
  Vanessa Vakharia: People would be like,"What?" Because there's no cultural belief that like men or attractive men aren't also intelligent, but there is for women, and that is just messed up.
• 0:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: Hello, and welcome to this week's episode of Math Therapy, which I'm recording from a beautiful motel room in beautiful Bar Harbor, Maine.
• 0:48
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, I've been on the road for this past week, which means I've been on Instagram a lot.
• 0:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: Every plane ride, every Uber ride, every whatever ride, there I am on my phone.
• 0:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: And that means that I have noticed that something very strange is going on because I have received multiple DMs about multiple math trends, none of which are very good.
• 1:11
  Vanessa Vakharia: You know, in 2010, I wrote a master's thesis called Imagining a World Where Paris Hilton Loves Math, and in that thesis, I integrated an interdisciplinary approach involving feminist theory, marketing theory, and mathematics education in order to uncover, discover, you know, interrogate, explore, research, figure out why and how media and pop culture actually make it impossible for women to retain their identities while also identifying as being good at math.
• 1:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: I mean, you guys know that I've said this a million times before, and if you're new to the podcast, I'm gonna ask you right now, when's the last time you saw a movie or TV show where the cheerleader character was good at math?
• 1:54
  Vanessa Vakharia: I say that because you're probably going to say,"Well, never," because it has never happened.
• 2:01
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, I will say there is a character in Mindy Kaling's Sex Lives of College Girls, Leighton, and she is a cheerleader who's good at math, but part of her whole, like, character arc is that she hides that because she wants to be cool, so, like, I don't even count that.
• 2:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: Here's the real truth, is forever and ever and ever, we've been sold this lie that women either need to be a certain way, or they can't actually be good at math or belong to the world of mathematics.
• 2:25
  Vanessa Vakharia: And that certain way, by the way, usually has to do with femininity.
• 2:30
  Vanessa Vakharia: They need to not be what we consider traditionally feminine in order to be good at math.
• 2:34
  Vanessa Vakharia: They can't wear makeup.
• 2:36
  Vanessa Vakharia: They can't, like, dress nicely.
• 2:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: They can't care about the way they look.
• 2:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: They can't have social skills.
• 2:41
  Vanessa Vakharia: They can't have crushes.
• 2:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: They can't be in love.
• 2:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, they can, but if they do, then they're gonna be given the role in the movie or TV show that's, like, the pretty, popular girl, not the nerdy girl who's good at math that needs a makeover to get the guy.
• 2:54
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, you might be thinking,"Vanessa, your master's thesis was in 2010.
• 2:58
  Vanessa Vakharia: Everything's changed since then," and I would love to agree with you.
• 3:01
  Vanessa Vakharia: I really would.
• 3:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: However, here we are a decade and a half later, and I'm about to share three viral math trends from the last week that paint a very different picture, and the picture they paint is,"Oh, wow, it's like it's 2010 again." Now, when these trends popped across my feed, my first instinct was,"Okay, oh my God, can everyone please stop doing this?
• 3:25
  Vanessa Vakharia: Can everyone please stop sharing this?
• 3:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: Can these trends please stop?
• 3:28
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, what are we doing?" I was mad at the creators.
• 3:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: I was mad at the people who were, like, emulating the trends.
• 3:34
  Vanessa Vakharia: I was like,"Oh my God, you guys are just reinforcing all the stereotypes." But then I started reading the comments, and I was like,"You know what?
• 3:41
  Vanessa Vakharia: This is a, like, don't hate the player, hate the game situation," because it's not the individuals who are sharing the content or who are, like, in the comments being like,"Oh my God, I can relate," or the ones who are copying the trends and making them their own.
• 3:54
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's not entirely their fault, because the reason they are latching onto these trends is because the trends are making them feel seen, and I think that's the bigger problem, is that we have this collective malaise around mathematics and like these trends are just a byproduct of that.
• 4:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: And like we have to stop ignoring it.
• 4:13
  Vanessa Vakharia: We have to stop ignoring it, and we have to figure out what to do here So today, while I'm here to criticize these trends, because honestly I really am, I also wanna unpack why they resonate so deeply, what they're telling us about our relationship with math, and why I actually think they're pointing us towards a much bigger conversation about math trauma.
• 4:32
  Vanessa Vakharia: And I do want to point out these trends all involve women.
• 4:37
  Vanessa Vakharia: They all involve women.
• 4:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: So I just have to say, I want you to look at this through this lens of the fact that these three things I'm about to talk about are specifically targeting women.
• 4:49
  Vanessa Vakharia: Ask yourself what kind of message that's sending, what purpose that serves, and how we're gonna go about fixing this whole situation that we found ourselves in, where yet again, in 2026, women are still being told that they can't be themselves and be good at math.
• 5:09
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, before I get into the three trends, if you're listening to this right now and you're like,"Oh my God, this sounds like it's gonna get really juicy," it is.
• 5:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: If you're also listening to this right now being like,"I've been seeing this stuff too, and I've been telling my friends to stop sharing it," or,"I've been seeing this stuff too, and, like, I don't know what to do about it," the first thing you can do is actually share this episode.
• 5:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: Share this episode right now, because the sooner we stop just blindly kind of looking at these trends and scrolling by them, and instead stopping, seeing them for what they are, and taking action, the sooner our, like, stratosphere, our feeds, our, like, world, our- the noise around us, the sooner that will get cleaned up.
• 5:48
  Vanessa Vakharia: Because the truth is, when we have stereotypes floating around and we are constantly seeing stuff on our screens that reinforces those stereotypes, those stereotypes get normalized.
• 5:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: So the first thing you can do is send this episode to somebody else right now so that they're aware of them too, so that they too can take the actions that I'm gonna share at the end of this episode.
• 6:07
  Vanessa Vakharia: All right.
• 6:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: Let's get into it Okay, viral trend number one.
• 6:12
  Vanessa Vakharia: I have been sent this by so many people in so many different forums.
• 6:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: At first...
• 6:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, so the first way this popped across my feed is it was a video of Gracie Bowers, who is, like, an amazing rock star, and what the text said over her reel was,"You're so creative," in quotation marks, and then the next set of quotation marks said,"Thanks.
• 6:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: I used to cry during math homework." And then there's, like, a video of her, like, rocking out on stage.
• 6:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: I saw this and I was like,"Oh my God, poor Gracie.
• 6:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: I should get her on the podcast." I didn't realize it was a trend.
• 6:44
  Vanessa Vakharia: I thought she was just making this video.
• 6:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: But then I started getting it sent to me by more and more people.
• 6:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: The next one was the exact same thing,"You're so creative.""Thanks.
• 6:53
  Vanessa Vakharia: I used to cry during math homework," and this was a person, like, painting in the background.
• 6:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: Another one,"You're so creative.""Thanks.
• 6:59
  Vanessa Vakharia: I used to cry during math homework." This one was somebody, like, painting a room and, like, doing a whole floor plan and designing a house.
• 7:04
  Vanessa Vakharia: And I was like,"Oh my God, this is a trend.
• 7:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's a trend." And why do I know that?
• 7:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: Because on the third one I watched, there was a little button I could press that said,"Use this template." And I was like,"Oh my God, this is a template someone has made." So, like, now, uh, people can just go in and fill in their clips in the backdrop, and the text will stay the same.
• 7:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: The text will keep saying,"You're so creative.""Thanks.
• 7:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: I used to cry during math homework." Oh my God.
• 7:30
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, so I have so many thoughts here.
• 7:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: The first is, how many times do we hear about people crying over math homework?
• 7:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's always crying.
• 7:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: We're always crying over our math homework.
• 7:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: That actually really upsets me because I don't think that's something that's made up.
• 7:46
  Vanessa Vakharia: I think that's a real experience people share.
• 7:48
  Vanessa Vakharia: I think it was traumatizing for so many people, and it is traumatizing, and I think that trauma bond is really deep when you see someone else post about it.
• 7:56
  Vanessa Vakharia: But the deeper thing here is this idea of being creative versus doing math.
• 8:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: The message of this trend seems to be like,"Look at me now." Like, someone's getting a compliment for how creative they are, and they're, like, really proud, and they're like,"Thank you so much for validating me because you know what?
• 8:13
  Vanessa Vakharia: Back in the day, I used to cry over my math homework." I'm taking away two things, and I am actually curious.
• 8:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, text the podcast if you have another interpretation.
• 8:21
  Vanessa Vakharia: My interpretation is that the message the reel is sending is, number one, you're either creative or mathematical, right?
• 8:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, these people are being celebrated because they're so creative, and then they're like,"Thanks." Like,"I never needed math anyway." And actually, a lot of their captions will say,"Never needed math anyway." So it's kind of like this fuck you to being like,"Yeah, I used to cry over my math homework, but, like, look at me now." But, like, what bothers me is, like, so many of these people in the videos they've posted in these reels are doing things that involve math.
• 8:54
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, es- the person who's, like, decorating the inside of her home and painting the walls, I'm like, I--"You're using math." I mean, Gracie Bower, like, a musician, you're using math.
• 9:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, you know, you're using math not only in your chord progressions and your song structures, but, like, uh, you're a musician.
• 9:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: You're a, a, a business person.
• 9:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I know you're using math in that sense.
• 9:12
  Vanessa Vakharia: But I also get it.
• 9:13
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm not mad at them.
• 9:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm just like, ugh, I know what's happening here.
• 9:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: They're using math that wasn't traditionally evaluated in the math classroom, and therefore it never counted as real math.
• 9:25
  Vanessa Vakharia: You know, I find this, anytime someone says they suck at math, what they really mean is,"I was not good at or was not made to feel good at the math that I did in class, the math that was evaluated in class." And that's just really depressing because it shows, like, this whole vibe of we have so much work to do with how we're defining mathematics, because everyone posting this reel, you know, their assumption is they're do- using no math in their day-to-day life when they really are, and yet again, I, we're reinforcing that stereotype that you're creative or good at math.
• 9:56
  Vanessa Vakharia: And on the flip side, they're using so much math, but on the other hand, when we're doing math, we are being so creative.
• 10:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: Solving math problems is inherently creative in nature, right?
• 10:06
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I just Engineers are constantly just coming up with creative solutions.
• 10:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: They're like,"We could try this.
• 10:11
  Vanessa Vakharia: We could try that." When you're solving a problem that you don't know how to solve, that's when creativity flourishes.
• 10:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: In fact, when we're solving problems that we know how to solve or that we are told to use a specific formula for or to just copy steps, you're right.
• 10:25
  Vanessa Vakharia: There is no creativity in that.
• 10:26
  Vanessa Vakharia: And again, this is not the fault of the people posting the reel.
• 10:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: That's probably how they were taught math, in a very uncreative way.
• 10:32
  Vanessa Vakharia: But math at its core is creative.
• 10:35
  Vanessa Vakharia: You're supposed to not know how to solve the problem, and then use creativity to figure it the fuck out.
• 10:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, that's the whole thing.
• 10:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: So I feel like that's message number one from this reel is you're either creative or you're good at math.
• 10:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: The other message I'm getting from this reel is that giant, like,"F you." You know?
• 10:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's that, like,"Thank you.
• 10:53
  Vanessa Vakharia: I am really creative.
• 10:54
  Vanessa Vakharia: I am good at something.
• 10:56
  Vanessa Vakharia: I used to cry over my math homework because I was made to feel like I was dumb." That's really the vibe I'm getting, especially from so many of these captions.
• 11:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: And I think that again points to this entire issue we have where, like, we have positioned it so that math is the thing that makes you smart, so that when kids don't know math, they feel stupid, they feel unintelligent, they feel less worthy.
• 11:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: They struggle through school feeling like they have no sense of self.
• 11:19
  Vanessa Vakharia: And then, you know, in later years they find this thing they're passionate about, and they can look back and say,"See, I was worth something.
• 11:26
  Vanessa Vakharia: Math was not the thing that defined me." And like fucking of course it's not the thing that defines you.
• 11:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: But why do so many people feel like it is?
• 11:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: That's our fault.
• 11:34
  Vanessa Vakharia: I mean, not us, like the people, like, making the podcast, AKA me, or listening to the podcast, you.
• 11:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: But it...
• 11:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: as a collective, that is our fault.
• 11:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: What are we doing that is making people identify so to a core level with the fact that they were bad at math?
• 11:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: What is happening here?
• 11:51
  Vanessa Vakharia: And you know what, guys?
• 11:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: Honestly, the comments just reaffirm how big of a feeling this is.
• 11:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm just gonna read some of them to you out now.
• 11:59
  Vanessa Vakharia: remember, this is a reel that's like,"You're so creative.""Thanks.
• 12:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: I used to cry over my math homework." People are simply responding to the...
• 12:06
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, people have latched onto the,"I used to cry over my math homework," and here are some of the comments:"Same, girl.""So it wasn't just me.""Me too.""Literally.""You're not alone.""Relatable AF.""I get it, girl," broken heart emoji.
• 12:22
  Vanessa Vakharia: "OMG 100% relate.
• 12:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: I used to cry because I couldn't solve my maths homework." We get this." Then someone commented,"You're either pretty or you can do math," nail emoji.
• 12:32
  Vanessa Vakharia: Oh my fucking God.
• 12:34
  Vanessa Vakharia: "Same girl, same girl.""Literally.""Me too.""I used to cry all the time.""This is so relatable." A lot of crying emojis.
• 12:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: Crying emoji, cry- Okay.
• 12:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: You get the picture.
• 12:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: The point is that there...
• 12:44
  Vanessa Vakharia: A- and you know what I have to say?
• 12:46
  Vanessa Vakharia: Any time I see a reel or anything on Instagram about someone being like,"I'm crying over my math homework," or,"I used to cry," it's hundreds, thousands of comments, guys, thousands of comments of people being like,"Me too." And then these s- horrible stories that I'm just like,"Oh my God, math trauma, math trauma, math trauma." Like people being like,"My dad used to yell at me." Like,"I used to be up with my parents till 3:00 AM.""My teacher told me I was stu-" Like it's like this endless thing.
• 13:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: So, like, crying over math has become this shared cultural experience in North America.
• 13:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: Can we think about that?
• 13:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: A, a shared cultural experience of crying over our math homework as children?
• 13:20
  Vanessa Vakharia: And this is the thing, this reel has gone viral, this trend has gone viral not because it's, like, an especially clever joke, but because millions of people immediately recognize themselves in it, and I want us to think about how strange that is.
• 13:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: Why have we normalized that?
• 13:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: If someone joked that, like, science homework left them in tears for years or, like, their history homework, like, was this endless source of, like, pain and grief every single day for years, we'd be like,"What?
• 13:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: Oh, interesting." Like,"Tell me more about that." We'd probably ask questions about it.
• 13:48
  Vanessa Vakharia: But with math, we're like,"Yep, me too." That's it, the end.
• 13:51
  Vanessa Vakharia: We don't even ask why.
• 13:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's like,"Yeah, of course." The thing is, this trend tells me that we've normalized emotional pain around math.
• 13:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: All these trends tell me that, actually.
• 13:59
  Vanessa Vakharia: We've stopped seeing those experiences as something worth unpacking, and it's just something to be like,"Yep, me too.
• 14:04
  Vanessa Vakharia: I agree.
• 14:05
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's normal." It's normal, and the solution is you say fuck it to math, and you move on and do something non-mathematical with the rest of your life, and then look back and try to heal from years and years of not feeling good enough from math.
• 14:20
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, what?
• 14:22
  Vanessa Vakharia: What?
• 14:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, why isn't the conversation,"Why did so many of us have this experience?
• 14:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: Why is this a rite of passage growing up?" Like, it's incredibly revealing, and it tells us we've become more comfortable bonding over math pain than questioning why so many people experienced it in the first place Now, I made a reel to, like, try to combat this, but I don't think I did a great job explain- like, you'd have to read the caption, but I made a reel using this, and I actually put my own videos of me doing math.
• 14:51
  Vanessa Vakharia: So the reel says, like,"You're so creative.""Thanks.
• 14:54
  Vanessa Vakharia: I used to cry doing math homework," and it's me doing math in the background, and in the caption I tried to unpack it.
• 14:58
  Vanessa Vakharia: So you can check that out on Instagram if you wanna, like, share that, uh, if you wanna read what I said in the caption, if you want to, like, send that to somebody who feels like they're creative at the exclusion of math or vice versa.
• 15:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: So I've got that up there for you.
• 15:12
  Vanessa Vakharia: Let's move on to the next trend.
• 15:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, the second trend that has gone viral right now is basically...
• 15:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: So the way the format works is you post a video of you, like, driving, chilling, doing whatever, and then the text over top says,"Please know that if we are ever in a situation where we are both doing a math problem in our heads trying to figure something out, I am pretending and it's all on you." Okay.
• 15:36
  Vanessa Vakharia: Again, the comments are the same thing.
• 15:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: The comments are people being like,"Yep, it's definitely on you," or like,"That would never be me doing the math problem," or,"Math in my head?
• 15:45
  Vanessa Vakharia: LOL," or,"Math?
• 15:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: Who knows her?" Like, those are all the comments.
• 15:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: And on the surface, like, it's like a joke about mental math.
• 15:53
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, okay, fine, we're not doing math in our heads, but it's really not about that.
• 15:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's really not about that.
• 15:59
  Vanessa Vakharia: This gives me the impression, like, when I see this, I'm like, okay, what is the takeaway here?
• 16:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: The takeaway to me is, again, this vibe of yeah, like, if we're ever in a situation where we're both supposed to be doing a math problem, just know that I'm not doing it.
• 16:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: There's no way I'm doing mental math, period.
• 16:16
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's about confidence.
• 16:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's about identity.
• 16:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's about what we've learned to believe about ourselves, right?
• 16:20
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, people aren't saying,"I'm out of practice," or like,"Let me just get a piece of paper." Like, that wouldn't be very clickbait, but like, do you know what I mean?
• 16:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: They're saying,"I've accepted that somebody else should do this.
• 16:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: I've accepted that the person doing the math should not be me." It's the classic, like, it's dinner time and the bill comes, and we all pass the bill to someone else to calculate the tip.
• 16:41
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, we're just like,"Oh, no, it shouldn't be me." It's a bit...
• 16:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: it's giving learned helplessness.
• 16:45
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I know that seems, like, really dramatic, but it's kind of giving learned helplessness, to be honest.
• 16:49
  Vanessa Vakharia: Somewhere along the way, millions of people have learned that pretending was safer than trying, and like, that's the other thing about this reel, right?
• 16:55
  Vanessa Vakharia: They're basically sa- saying,"If we're both stuck in a situation where we're both, like, supposed to be solving a math problem, know that I'm sitting there pretending I'm solving it.
• 17:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: But that's actually not what's happening, and I'm actually waiting for you to give me the answer." And I think this just shows us, again, another collective feeling that, like, being wrong in math wasn't just uncomfortable for us, and it's not just uncomfortable.
• 17:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's embarrassing.
• 17:16
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's exposing.
• 17:16
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's, like, proof that we're not smart.
• 17:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: So, like, the best strategy is pretend you know what's going on and let someone else answer.
• 17:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: And also, I, with these reels, I think it's like, make yourself the joke first before someone else can do it, right?
• 17:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, there's so much shame attached to it.
• 17:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: This is gonna seem completely unrelated, but it's actually not, and I'm gonna tell you guys a story.
• 17:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: I just finished visiting Acadia National Park.
• 17:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, I've never been to a national park.
• 17:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: All right?
• 17:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I don't- I'm not, like, a hiker.
• 17:44
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm not, like, a...
• 17:45
  Vanessa Vakharia: I, I mean, I like nature, but, like, you know, I've got my limits.
• 17:48
  Vanessa Vakharia: But, you know, everyone talks, talks about this national park, and there was supposed to be this beach there.
• 17:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: And you guys know I'm overcoming my fear of driving in the US and driving rental cars, and, like, I have got my rental car.
• 17:59
  Vanessa Vakharia: I feel really good in it, and I was like, you know what?
• 18:01
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, it's a beautiful day.
• 18:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: I wanna go on this adventure.
• 18:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: I wanna, like, go see the ocean.
• 18:04
  Vanessa Vakharia: So I go to this national park.
• 18:06
  Vanessa Vakharia: This place was insane.
• 18:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: It was insa- oh my God, guys.
• 18:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: I swear, I just looked up and I swear there is a ma- oh my God.
• 18:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: Oh my God.
• 18:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, wait till you hear what I'm about to tell you, and you're gonna hear how TANC that is.
• 18:21
  Vanessa Vakharia: And TANC, by the way, means There Are No Coincidences.
• 18:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: I have a tattoo to my right bicep.
• 18:25
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, this is crazy.
• 18:26
  Vanessa Vakharia: This is crazy.
• 18:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: I wasn't even gonna tell this story, but now I have to.
• 18:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: I just looked up, and there is a map right in front of me.
• 18:34
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, why is that TANC?
• 18:36
  Vanessa Vakharia: Well, because I go into the national park.
• 18:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: I thought this park, like, I don't know.
• 18:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: I thought it was gonna be, like, 10 minutes to drive around the whole thing.
• 18:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: This, this is a giant park.
• 18:45
  Vanessa Vakharia: I finally find the visitor center, and I'm like...
• 18:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: 'Cause I'm like,"How am I gonna know where to find Sand Beach?" That's apparently where the ocean is.
• 18:51
  Vanessa Vakharia: And I'm like,"Oh, a sign for a visitor center.
• 18:53
  Vanessa Vakharia: That makes sense.
• 18:53
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'll go to the visitor center and I'll, like, ask them what's up." There are hundreds of people here, okay?
• 18:58
  Vanessa Vakharia: Milling about with their hiking gear and their boots and their, like, walking sticks.
• 19:01
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm, like, cruising in.
• 19:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: I've got a, a shoulder tote bag, which, by the way, I've now learned you should not bring hiking.
• 19:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: That is not a good idea.
• 19:09
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, fine.
• 19:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: Who cares?
• 19:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: I go to the visitor center.
• 19:11
  Vanessa Vakharia: I get in line to buy the park pass, and I'm like,"Hey, Can you recommend, like, what..." There's, like, a bunch of different hikes, right?
• 19:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: There's, like, tons of hi- I don't know how many, but, like, 50 different hikes and, like, trails.
• 19:21
  Vanessa Vakharia: I don't know.
• 19:21
  Vanessa Vakharia: Not 50, but, like, a lot.
• 19:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm like,"Could you recommend, like, a hike that would be, like, nice and easy and, like, around an ocean?" And the guy's like,"Yeah, go on the Ocean Walk Trail." I'm like,"Great.
• 19:30
  Vanessa Vakharia: Could you show me where that is?" He whips open a giant map.
• 19:35
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, a giant map like you used to use in, like, the'90s.
• 19:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, a paper fucking map.
• 19:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, this thing is, like, bigger than a newspaper.
• 19:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: And he's like,"All right, so you're standing right here." And he has his pen, right?
• 19:45
  Vanessa Vakharia: He's like,"You're standing right here." Like, circles the thing.
• 19:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: And he's like,"You're just gonna pop over there, and then you're gonna follow Route 3 to this, and then you're gonna turn left.
• 19:51
  Vanessa Vakharia: Then there's this hairpin turn." And he's circling this shit all over the map, and I'm like,"Dude, I don't...
• 19:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: hold your...
• 19:58
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, slow your roll." Now, it's not that I can't read a map.
• 20:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: Well, it's kind of that I can't read a map, but it's because I've never put much effort into reading a map.
• 20:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: I rely entirely on my GPS.
• 20:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: I find it very hard to, like, orient myself around a map.
• 20:13
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I'm one of those people that, like, you know, when you have your GPS on, and then you just start walking straight to see, like, whether the little pin, like, is in front of you or behind you, and then you course-correct that way instead of, like, orienting yourself in the first place and knowing which way to go.
• 20:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: That's me.
• 20:28
  Vanessa Vakharia: Again, growth mindset.
• 20:30
  Vanessa Vakharia: I believe in it.
• 20:30
  Vanessa Vakharia: I have not worked on this skill.
• 20:32
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm sure I could get better on it.
• 20:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: At the moment, I am a zero at it.
• 20:35
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay?
• 20:35
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm like,"Dude," I'm like,"I do not know what you're saying." So finally I look at him and I'm like,"Listen, sir." I'm like,"I know this is, like, a concerning thing for me to be telling you in this national park, but, like, I'm not very comfortable reading maps.
• 20:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I, I have no idea what you just said." And him and his friends look at each other and they're like,"Does someone else in your party...?" And I'm like,"Oh, no, it's just me." And he's like,"No problem." He literally goes,"No problem." He holds up the map, turns it around and goes,"This is where you're standing right now.
• 21:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: Let's try to look at it from your perspective.
• 21:05
  Vanessa Vakharia: You're gonna go down here." And I was like,"Okay, this is so much easier." And I was like,"Okay, and, like, if I can't find it..." He was like,"Honestly, if you can't find it, you can always throw on your GPS.
• 21:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, this is what you would put in your GPS." Now, by the way, guys, there was, like, no reception at this park, so I could not have used my GPS, but, like, he was so helpful.
• 21:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: He was like...
• 21:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: He slowed down immediately.
• 21:26
  Vanessa Vakharia: He was like,"Okay, like, how do you want me to explain this to you?" He was like,"You're gonna see signs." Like, he made me feel so much better about the whole thing.
• 21:32
  Vanessa Vakharia: Anyways, I left.
• 21:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: I ended up not, I didn't even pick up the map ever again, but I, like, followed the signs, and some of the stuff he had said stuck in my head.
• 21:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: So, like, when I got to that hairpin turn, I was like,"Oh, this must, must be, like, the hairpin turn." Anyways, I'm fine.
• 21:45
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm alive.
• 21:45
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I went on the craziest hike.
• 21:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, two children had to basically lead me back down because I- they were like, we were climbing on our hands and knees, and I'd be like,"Guys, how do we get down here?" And then they would just, like, hop over it like it was no big deal.
• 21:56
  Vanessa Vakharia: They were very nice.
• 21:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: Doesn't matter.
• 21:58
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm safe.
• 21:58
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm alive.
• 21:59
  Vanessa Vakharia: And my point of the story is...
• 22:01
  Vanessa Vakharia: I have learned in my life to just ask for help.
• 22:04
  Vanessa Vakharia: I have learned to never be scared of saying,"I don't know.
• 22:07
  Vanessa Vakharia: I don't understand.
• 22:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: Explain it to me again for a 10th time." And because of that, I've had the opportunity to learn so much.
• 22:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: I did the hike today.
• 22:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: I found the place.
• 22:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: I experienced being temporarily lost.
• 22:19
  Vanessa Vakharia: I regained my footing.
• 22:21
  Vanessa Vakharia: I, like, did the whole hike.
• 22:22
  Vanessa Vakharia: I did two trails.
• 22:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: I knew where I was.
• 22:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like I left with such a sense of accomplishment and being like,"Holy shit." Like, I really...
• 22:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: You know, when I was at that visitor center when that guy first whipped out the map, like, I was considering being like,"I think you should call it a day and go home." You know what I mean?
• 22:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: And I didn't, and because I expressed my need for help, the guy helped me, and because he helped me, I was able to do the thing, and because I did the thing, I now feel more confident.
• 22:46
  Vanessa Vakharia: Do you see what I mean?
• 22:48
  Vanessa Vakharia: But in math, and, like, back to this whole reel and what it tells us is, it's just so much easier to pretend you know what's happening, get through the moment, ditch the shame and embarrassment that could come with ad- admitting that you don't know, and get through the moment.
• 23:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, survive the moment instead of actually making something of it.
• 23:06
  Vanessa Vakharia: But the problem is, you survive the moment.
• 23:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: You get through it.
• 23:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: We all got through math class.
• 23:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: But you leave, and even though you move on to other things and you don't think you're ever using math again, fine.
• 23:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: You always carry that wound with you and that belief that you couldn't do the thing.
• 23:20
  Vanessa Vakharia: Because you never asked for help, and therefore you never got the help you needed, and you were never able to see what you're truly capable of.
• 23:26
  Vanessa Vakharia: 'Cause I know everyone posting these reels is capable of doing math, right?
• 23:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I feel it hurts for me to be like,"Fuck," like, they're all carrying these wounds.
• 23:34
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, they were made to feel like they couldn't do math.
• 23:36
  Vanessa Vakharia: And also, by the way, they were made to feel like they couldn't ask for help.
• 23:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: I believe that.
• 23:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: I think that it's really hard in so many classrooms, and this is part of the work we're all doing with Math Therapy.
• 23:44
  Vanessa Vakharia: How do we create a safe environment so a kid can say,"I know you explained this to me five times.
• 23:49
  Vanessa Vakharia: I still don't get it.
• 23:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: I still don't get it." Right?
• 23:51
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, and that's on us.
• 23:53
  Vanessa Vakharia: That's on us.
• 23:54
  Vanessa Vakharia: We've gotta create environments where that's okay.
• 23:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: And, and many of us grew up in an environment where you weren't even allowed to ask a question, let alone say you didn't understand something for the fifth time.
• 24:04
  Vanessa Vakharia: So all that to say, I mean, this reel to me, this whole trend of being like, if we're ever both supposed to be working on a math problem and it looks like I'm doing math in my head, so it's on you, that's like a protective strategy, right?
• 24:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: We're like bonding with one another being like,"Me too.
• 24:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: Yep.
• 24:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: Ha ha.
• 24:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: LOL," like,"I can't do math, but don't worry," like,"I'll have you do it for me." And we're kind of just going into avoidance right there saying,"I will not be doing any math.
• 24:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: I will be asking someone else, and I'm okay with that.
• 24:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm laughing about it so it doesn't hurt." But like it hurts to think that you just can't do something, especially when that thing is math, and math is this thing in school that was like used to make people feel big or small.
• 24:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: Again, if you got another interpretation of what this reel might mean, what this trend might be saying, text the podcast right now.
• 24:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: There's a link in your show notes.
• 24:49
  Vanessa Vakharia: Click that link and text me.
• 24:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: I wanna know what you think it means.
• 24:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: And finally, we are gonna get...
• 24:53
  Vanessa Vakharia: Oh my God, I'm nervous for this third one, to be honest okay, this one is not an Instagram trend, or at least that's not how it started.
• 25:01
  Vanessa Vakharia: But I, I...
• 25:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: You know what?
• 25:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's actually nice that I'm ending here, because I'm ending with something that happened that we together have rectified in a way.
• 25:12
  Vanessa Vakharia: And that is that the third viral trend-ish thing that happened is a Australian retailer called Myer came out with a shirt, and on that shirt it said,"I'm too pretty to do math." Now, you're probably thinking,"Vanessa, this sounds very familiar.
• 25:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm having déjà vu." Yes, you are fucking having déjà vu.
• 25:36
  Vanessa Vakharia: Why?
• 25:37
  Vanessa Vakharia: Because the exact same shirt came out in 2011.
• 25:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: In fact, that was part of my master's thesis work, was interrogating all of the clothing that was out that was marketed...
• 25:49
  Vanessa Vakharia: By the way, by the way, I've not even mentioned this yet.
• 25:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: Notice that the past two reels that I've talked about, the past two viral trends, the only people I have seen using them and sharing them are women.
• 26:01
  Vanessa Vakharia: Just FYI.
• 26:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, and now this shirt is a shirt for women.
• 26:05
  Vanessa Vakharia: It is targeted to girls and women.
• 26:07
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, in 2011, I did this entire deep dive into all of these shirts that came out.
• 26:13
  Vanessa Vakharia: One of them was,"I'm too pretty to do my math homework, so my brother does it for me." There was,"I'm too pretty to do math." There was an entire Forever 21 line with things like,"Allergic to algebra," and other, like, kind of, like, demeaning things only for women.
• 26:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: Only for women, okay?
• 26:28
  Vanessa Vakharia: All of these shirts are only for women.
• 26:30
  Vanessa Vakharia: I have not seen a"I'm too handsome to do math" shirt, by the way.
• 26:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, in 2011, when that Forever 21 line came out, I actually posted a picture of the shirt that said,"Allergic to algebra." It was, like, this pink T-shirt, and all of my students were like,"Oh my God, that's so cute." And immediately I was like,"Guys, it is telling you girls that, like, you should be wearing a shirt that says allergic to algebra because you can't possibly be good at math." They instantly went so to town on this that within a week the shirt was pulled from Forever 21.
• 27:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: It was no longer for sale.
• 27:04
  Vanessa Vakharia: They emailed, they tweeted.
• 27:06
  Vanessa Vakharia: They, like, f- totally lost it.
• 27:07
  Vanessa Vakharia: The same thing happened l- years later with Benefit Cosmetics, by the way.
• 27:12
  Vanessa Vakharia: They had a whole c- ad campaign that was like, it's better to be...
• 27:16
  Vanessa Vakharia: it, it said something...
• 27:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: Oh, it w- it said, uh,"Skip class, not your concealer." And again, I posted about it.
• 27:22
  Vanessa Vakharia: We all went...
• 27:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, honestly, you guys killed it, because we were all reposting, we were emailing, we were like...
• 27:28
  Vanessa Vakharia: And that entire ad campaign got pulled.
• 27:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: I cannot believe in 2020...
• 27:32
  Vanessa Vakharia: I, I would like to say I can't believe, but I can believe in 2026, 15 years later, someone has made that shirt again.
• 27:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: We've already been here.
• 27:41
  Vanessa Vakharia: We've already done it.
• 27:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: There it is, the shirt.
• 27:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm too pretty to do math.
• 27:45
  Vanessa Vakharia: Wanna know the worst part?
• 27:46
  Vanessa Vakharia: Within a week on the website, there was only two sizes left, which meant that people were buying this shirt.
• 27:54
  Vanessa Vakharia: Oh my God.
• 27:55
  Vanessa Vakharia: Oh my God.
• 27:56
  Vanessa Vakharia: Oh my God.
• 27:56
  Vanessa Vakharia: Oh my God.
• 27:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: This sort of fascinates me because it's not just saying,"I'm not good at math," right?
• 28:00
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, it's turning math ability into this identity about...
• 28:04
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, the vibe is like,"This isn't something I do.
• 28:06
  Vanessa Vakharia: This isn't something I'll ever become.
• 28:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: This isn't j- who I am." But, like, the subtext here is...
• 28:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: Well, I don't even think it's subtext.
• 28:16
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's very obvious.
• 28:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: The message is that pretty people don't do math.
• 28:21
  Vanessa Vakharia: Sorry, let me, let me be specific.
• 28:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: Pretty girls, pretty women don't do math.
• 28:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: That stere- It just...
• 28:28
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's back to the cheerleader.
• 28:30
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's back to the fact that there's no cheerleader that's good at math.
• 28:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's back to the fact that when girls are portrayed as doing math in the movies or TV, they're normally unpopular.
• 28:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: They have, like, no sense of style.
• 28:41
  Vanessa Vakharia: They have no social skills.
• 28:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: They need the makeover to get the guy.
• 28:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I just don't understand how this is still happening.
• 28:46
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I just...
• 28:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: You know what?
• 28:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: So many people sent me this shirt, that, like, I was stunned.
• 28:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: I was like,"This can't be re- This can't be a real thing." Then I learned it was, like, one of the most popular retailers in Australia, and I was like,"What is going on?" Here's, here's the good news.
• 29:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: Actually, I won't tell you the good news.
• 29:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: I wanna dig a bit deeper into this first.
• 29:05
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, imagine there was a shirt that said,"I'm too pretty to read," or,"I'm too pretty to write," or, like,"I'm too pretty to think." Would we be into that?
• 29:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: Would we be sharing that?
• 29:16
  Vanessa Vakharia: Would we be buying that?
• 29:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: I don't know.
• 29:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: Would we?
• 29:19
  Vanessa Vakharia: I, I mean, I really don't think so, but this,"I'm too pretty to do math," it's like this instant grab.
• 29:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: And honestly, you know what I will say?
• 29:28
  Vanessa Vakharia: I think it's because girls have been told for so long that they can't possibly be smart, and of course, math is, like, the ultimate thing that makes you smart, even though that's BS.
• 29:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm just saying that's how we treat it, right?
• 29:41
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, we call people who are good at math smart.
• 29:44
  Vanessa Vakharia: I think it's because they were told for so long, and still are to a degree, that, like, they can't possibly be smart.
• 29:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: They can't possibly be good at math.
• 29:51
  Vanessa Vakharia: They're always made to feel like, like, in math class, there's so much research that shows that boys are picked when their hands are raised more than girls.
• 30:00
  Vanessa Vakharia: There's s- there's so much out there that, like, if a girl expresses that she's good at math, somebody will test her and be like,"Oh, really?" And doubt her.
• 30:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: She has to prove herself.
• 30:09
  Vanessa Vakharia: I think that has happened for so long that girls are finally like,"Yeah, fuck you.
• 30:12
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm too pretty to do math.
• 30:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: Done.
• 30:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: Great.
• 30:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: Bye." Right?
• 30:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, it's, like, almost like...
• 30:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: a bait and switch of them being like,"No, I'm the one who decided.
• 30:21
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm the one who decided, and fine, you think I can't do math?
• 30:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: At least I'm pretty," which is social capital.
• 30:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I, it really, really upsets me, and it really bothers me, especially because I have so many students, I have been tutoring girls for almost 20 years, and so many of them has, have expressed this sentiment that they're nervous.
• 30:41
  Vanessa Vakharia: They're too scared to go into a STEM program.
• 30:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: They're too scared to even say they're good at math or they like math.
• 30:46
  Vanessa Vakharia: They hide the fact that they're good at math, because of this whole thing.
• 30:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: They don't wanna be second-guessed.
• 30:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: They don't want someone to think they're weird.
• 30:53
  Vanessa Vakharia: They don't want someone to think they're a loser because, you know, you're either pretty or you're good at math.
• 30:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I think there are, there are two main themes wrapped up in here.
• 31:00
  Vanessa Vakharia: Theme number one is this idea that, like, being smart actually makes you less attractive, literally.
• 31:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: And theme number two, which is girls wanting to claim something, some form of power over all of the people who have told them they can't possibly be smart.
• 31:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: So being pretty is going to be that source of power.
• 31:20
  Vanessa Vakharia: An article came out in The Conversation last week to talk about all of this, and the article is actually titled"Too Pretty to Do Math?
• 31:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: Here's the Real Reason Girls Aren't Choosing to Study Maths".
• 31:30
  Vanessa Vakharia: Because by the way, as I write this, there is still a massive gender gap in post-secondary education when it comes to math-related fields.
• 31:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: And I really want to read this one section, okay?
• 31:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: "Studies suggest the biggest causes of girls opting out of maths are differences in how girls perceive their own mathematical ability and their lower interest in the subject.
• 31:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: In short, girls see themselves as less capable, even when they have the same actual math ability as their male classmates.
• 31:58
  Vanessa Vakharia: They are also less interested in math.
• 32:00
  Vanessa Vakharia: Children develop beliefs about who math is and isn't for from a very young age.
• 32:05
  Vanessa Vakharia: These beliefs are shaped by the messages they receive from," are you ready?
• 32:09
  Vanessa Vakharia: "Parents, teachers, peers, the media, and society.
• 32:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: When girls repeatedly encounter the idea that math is a masculine domain, this can influence their confidence, sense of belonging, and willingness to continue engaging with math.
• 32:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: So the fact that girls today are still hearing these messages that mathematics is not feminine is alarming." There.
• 32:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: There it is, right there I just keep coming back to the fact that this is so targeted to women, the message is being feminine and being mathematical don't naturally belong together.
• 32:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: And you know, when I talk about being feminine, I'm talking about the ways we have historically defined femininity.
• 32:45
  Vanessa Vakharia: So like it's neither here nor there.
• 32:47
  Vanessa Vakharia: Uh, what it really is, is being able to claim whatever identity you want as a woman is not an option for you if you also wanna be seen as smart.
• 32:54
  Vanessa Vakharia: You know, Math Therapy, the book, if you haven't seen it, it's pink, and I wanted to make a pink book.
• 32:59
  Vanessa Vakharia: And my publisher, Corwin, they were very supportive, but they also said,"We're, we're totally down.
• 33:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: We'll make a pink book, but some people won't buy it." Imagine that.
• 33:08
  Vanessa Vakharia: Some people won't buy it.
• 33:09
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's too girly.
• 33:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's too girly, and what does that mean?
• 33:13
  Vanessa Vakharia: It means that some people won't take it seriously.
• 33:16
  Vanessa Vakharia: Imagine the color of the cover of a book actually influencing what somebody thinks of the contents.
• 33:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: But I mean, I guess that's why they say the whole thing about like don't judge a book by its cover, but that's not the point.
• 33:28
  Vanessa Vakharia: I mean, it is, actually it is the point.
• 33:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: But like that's the thing, right?
• 33:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's this idea, and people who are wearing this shirt are probably not trying to communicate this, but that's the message.
• 33:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: When we're buying this shirt, when we're being like,"I like this post," like, oh my God, I should...
• 33:44
  Vanessa Vakharia: There's so many comments being like,"I wish I had this in high school," or,"This shirt is so me." Like, we are just reinforcing that stereotype.
• 33:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: And we're reinforcing the stereotype because the cultural belief underneath why the joke works is that being feminine and being mathematical don't naturally belong together.
• 34:01
  Vanessa Vakharia: That's why it's a joke, right?
• 34:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: If the shirt said,"I'm too handsome to do math," it wouldn't be funny.
• 34:07
  Vanessa Vakharia: People would be like,"What?" Because there's no cultural belief that like men or attractive men aren't also intelligent, but there is for women, and that is just messed up.
• 34:20
  Vanessa Vakharia: It's just messed up that it's still happening in 2026.
• 34:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, I read to you guys...
• 34:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, so tho- those are the three trends, okay?
• 34:26
  Vanessa Vakharia: We've got the two reels, and we've got the shirts.
• 34:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: We've got the comment sections, which are just reaffirming that these are landing, right?
• 34:35
  Vanessa Vakharia: But with the shirt, something more amazing happened.
• 34:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: What happened to me back in 2011 is happening now.
• 34:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: People have been posting about the shirt, explaining why it's so culturally damaging.
• 34:49
  Vanessa Vakharia: People have been saying they want that shirt taken down.
• 34:51
  Vanessa Vakharia: National science organizations, STEM organizations, math organizations, women's only organizations, like feminist organizations, news outlets have s- have latched on.
• 35:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: Why have they latched on?
• 35:04
  Vanessa Vakharia: Because of social media.
• 35:05
  Vanessa Vakharia: Because of you guys posting, reposting that shirt, explaining why it's a problem, explaining it's problematic, contacting news and media folks.
• 35:13
  Vanessa Vakharia: And guys, I have great news.
• 35:16
  Vanessa Vakharia: On this day, the shirt has been taken down.
• 35:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: It is no longer for sale, and it just shows you what power we have.
• 35:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: I mean, you can say all you want about social media, but this is the good thing about it, is we took that shit down, so it's no longer available.
• 35:30
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, that leads me to, what can we do, right?
• 35:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: When we see this stuff, I have so many messages from you guys being like,"I'm so pissed off.
• 35:36
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm so sick of seeing this stuff.
• 35:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: It makes me so upset." What can we do?
• 35:41
  Vanessa Vakharia: Well, the first is to realize that what we say, what we project, what we share, what we wear sends a message.
• 35:49
  Vanessa Vakharia: Every time we say,"I'm bad at math.
• 35:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: I've never been a math person.
• 35:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: My brain just doesn't work that way," we strengthen that belief.
• 35:55
  Vanessa Vakharia: And then when thousands of other people agree, it becomes even more deeply rooted.
• 35:59
  Vanessa Vakharia: This is the nature of stereotype reinforcement, right?
• 36:02
  Vanessa Vakharia: The comments aren't just describing someone's identity, they're reinforcing it, reinforcing it.
• 36:07
  Vanessa Vakharia: Every time someone likes it, it reinforces it.
• 36:09
  Vanessa Vakharia: And that's why these trends matter, not just because they're offensive, but because they're showing us in real time how math trauma continues to live long, long after people leave school.
• 36:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: So what do we do?
• 36:19
  Vanessa Vakharia: What do we do here?
• 36:20
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm gonna share a few things we can do.
• 36:21
  Vanessa Vakharia: If you're listening to this, you're getting all fired up.
• 36:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: You're like,"I've seen that trend.
• 36:25
  Vanessa Vakharia: What do I do the next time it pops across my feed?" Here are a few things.
• 36:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm not saying we should stop making jokes, right?
• 36:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: Humor can absolutely be a part of healing.
• 36:34
  Vanessa Vakharia: But when a joke is reinforcing a embedded stereotype that is harmful, we have to stop.
• 36:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: We have to ask ourselves why is that joke funny, and if it's funny because it's reinforcing something that we wanna stop perpetuating, then maybe we shouldn't be making that joke.
• 36:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: Questions we can ask ourselves when we see something like this and we're about to laugh or about to share is, why is this so relatable?
• 36:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: Why do so many adults still carry these beliefs?
• 37:00
  Vanessa Vakharia: What happened in our classrooms that made millions of people feel this way?
• 37:04
  Vanessa Vakharia: And what would it look like to stop treating math anxiety like a personality trait and start treating it like an experience we can heal from.
• 37:12
  Vanessa Vakharia: Next, don't share it.
• 37:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: That's honestly...
• 37:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: If you're like,"I don't wanna comment, I don't..."'Cause, you know, I also don't wanna start a whole war here, right?
• 37:19
  Vanessa Vakharia: The per- uh, to- in my opinion, the people posting these reels have math trauma.
• 37:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: That's why they're posting them.
• 37:26
  Vanessa Vakharia: So, like, getting into the comments and being like,"You're being so damaging.
• 37:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: Stop perpetuating..." I don't, I actually don't think that's the move.
• 37:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: I've been commenting on them being like, Hey, I totally understand why you're sharing this.
• 37:36
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm so sorry you feel that way.
• 37:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: Let me tell you about my experience'cause I actually felt like I couldn't do math, and then, like, I found out that, like, someone had been explaining it to me in a way that just didn't suit my needs," or,"Another teacher explained it this right way," or,"There's still hope," or,"You never have to do math again.
• 37:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: I totally support that, but I want you to know that, like, I know you can do it," or...
• 37:56
  Vanessa Vakharia: You know what I mean?
• 37:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, I'm more t- likely to comment something like that.
• 38:00
  Vanessa Vakharia: I also do look through the comments, and if I see somebody being like,"I feel this way, too.
• 38:05
  Vanessa Vakharia: I had this teacher who did this," or like,"I was always told I was stupid," I usually comment something nice.
• 38:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: But honestly, the, the number one thing you can do and the easiest thing you can do is just don't share it.
• 38:16
  Vanessa Vakharia: Don't keep that thing circulating, right?
• 38:19
  Vanessa Vakharia: The more it circulates, the more people are getting it across their feed.
• 38:22
  Vanessa Vakharia: And the third thing you can do is what all of these people did with the shirt.
• 38:26
  Vanessa Vakharia: Make your own media.
• 38:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: Make your own reel explaining why you think this is problematic or sending a different message.
• 38:32
  Vanessa Vakharia: Contact media outlets.
• 38:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: Email the companies that are making shit like,"I'm too pretty to do math" shirts, right?
• 38:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, it makes a difference.
• 38:41
  Vanessa Vakharia: Get a Math Therapy crew together, like a, a Math Therapy street team, and when you see stuff like this, call it out and create a counter-message.
• 38:49
  Vanessa Vakharia: It was really cool.
• 38:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: I actually saw an organization actually posted about this"I'm too pretty to do math" shirt, and they wrote, you know, they wrote a whole blurb about why it was problematic, and then they said,"Drop in the comments a different message we could put on a shirt instead." Okay, here are some of the things people commented.
• 39:07
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm gonna read some of them to you because they're funny.
• 39:09
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, the first one says,"I'm too pretty not to do math." Then someone wrote,"It's Mrs.
• 39:14
  Vanessa Vakharia: Doctor to you." We've got,"brains, beauty, and big equations""Solving problems, looking fabulous""My favorite subject is myself and math""Math is my superpower" love that,"Currently solving for my future" Girls do math, too, get over it." I mean, there are so many, and I love this, and honestly, let's see that merch.
• 39:34
  Vanessa Vakharia: Honestly, that's another thing you can do.
• 39:36
  Vanessa Vakharia: Go make a shirt.
• 39:37
  Vanessa Vakharia: Go make that shirt right now.
• 39:38
  Vanessa Vakharia: Make a mug.
• 39:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: Make a tote.
• 39:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: You know, when I wrote my master's thesis, by the way, in 2010, you know, in, in my thesis, I was providing all these solutions to, like, this whole problem, and one of my solutions was that Paris Hilton should make a brand of clothing that says...
• 39:52
  Vanessa Vakharia: you know how her thing is, like,"That's hot"?
• 39:54
  Vanessa Vakharia: I was like,"She should make a whole brand that's, like,'Math is hot.'" I was like, imagine she wore that shirt and girls bought that shirt and wore it.
• 40:01
  Vanessa Vakharia: It-- like, we need to change...
• 40:03
  Vanessa Vakharia: I, I'm such a believer in the power of pop culture, and our influence over it with social media now is so much more than when I wrote that thesis in 2010, we had, like, no social power, at least social media-wise.
• 40:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: Now, we can, we can make our own merch.
• 40:17
  Vanessa Vakharia: We can make this shit.
• 40:18
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm gonna make this stuff.
• 40:19
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm gonna make it.
• 40:19
  Vanessa Vakharia: That's it.
• 40:20
  Vanessa Vakharia: I'm making it.
• 40:20
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, fine.
• 40:21
  Vanessa Vakharia: Great.
• 40:22
  Vanessa Vakharia: Oh my God, as if I need more work to do.
• 40:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: I am making it.
• 40:24
  Vanessa Vakharia: That is how we're ending this episode.
• 40:26
  Vanessa Vakharia: I am making it.
• 40:27
  Vanessa Vakharia: Tell me what slogans.
• 40:28
  Vanessa Vakharia: That is what you're texting me.
• 40:29
  Vanessa Vakharia: Text me the T-shirt slogans you wanna see.
• 40:32
  Vanessa Vakharia: Also, do we want mugs?
• 40:34
  Vanessa Vakharia: Do we want totes?
• 40:34
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, what do we want?
• 40:35
  Vanessa Vakharia: Make it, and I'm gonna make us an entire back to school line to combat this bullshit I'm too pretty to do math shit.
• 40:42
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, that was a lot of swearing.
• 40:43
  Vanessa Vakharia: That was too much swearing in one sentence.
• 40:44
  Vanessa Vakharia: Guys, okay, this has been so amazing.
• 40:46
  Vanessa Vakharia: Thank you for listening.
• 40:48
  Vanessa Vakharia: Thank you for being the change we all wish to see.
• 40:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: Let's remember that these trends are not creating math trauma.
• 40:53
  Vanessa Vakharia: They are revealing math trauma, and unfortunately reinforcing it, in my opinion.
• 40:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: They're re-triggering it, but they're also, like, providing this catharsis for people who haven't healed, but I want people to really heal, and I want us to be a part of the change, and I know if you're listening to this, you already are.
• 41:10
  Vanessa Vakharia: These trends are showing us how many people are still carrying painful stories about math, and that is an opportunity.
• 41:15
  Vanessa Vakharia: Because once we stop accepting those stories as permanent identities, we can finally start changing them, and that is what we are doing right now.
• 41:22
  Vanessa Vakharia: Thank you so much for listening.
• 41:23
  Vanessa Vakharia: Thank you for all the work you do.
• 41:25
  Vanessa Vakharia: Anytime you see bullshit like this or any trends, DM them to me on Instagram@themathguru.
• 41:31
  Vanessa Vakharia: Make sure to text the podcast by hitting the link in your show notes.
• 41:33
  Vanessa Vakharia: Tell me what slogans you wanna see on a shirt, and tell me what other merch to make with that slogan.
• 41:39
  Vanessa Vakharia: Like, we are taking it back.
• 41:40
  Vanessa Vakharia: We are making this math is a cool vibe pop culture line.
• 41:44
  Vanessa Vakharia: We are doing it right now.
• 41:46
  Vanessa Vakharia: I am committed to the task.
• 41:48
  Vanessa Vakharia: Okay, the end.
• 41:49
  Vanessa Vakharia: Love you.
• 41:50
  Vanessa Vakharia: See you next week.
• 41:51
  Vanessa Vakharia: Thank you for fighting the good fight.
• 41:53
  Vanessa Vakharia: We would be nowhere without you, and we are everywhere because of you.
• 41:57
  Vanessa Vakharia: Xoxo.