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391: The Backwards Way Your Human Design Purpose Works · Unshakeable with Human Design - A Human Design For Business Podcast

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Nicole Laino: Foreign.
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Nicole Laino: Welcome to Unshakable with Human Design, the show dedicated to helping entrepreneurs use human design to shift from hustle to flow without sacrificing results.
0:16
Nicole Laino: Come here to become an unshakable human and build an unshakable business according to your human design.
0:21
Nicole Laino: I'm your host, Nicole Laino.
0:29
Nicole Laino: Hello, and welcome to Unshakeable with Human Design, everyone.
0:32
Nicole Laino: I'm your host, Nicole Laino, and we are here to talk about purpose.
0:37
Nicole Laino: I know that this is a favorite topic amongst our listeners.
0:42
Nicole Laino: I know that most of the readings that I do and when people join my programs, a lot of them will say, you know, I want to know what my purpose is.
0:50
Nicole Laino: I want to feel closer to my purpose.
0:52
Nicole Laino: I want to understand what my purpose is.
0:55
Nicole Laino: I spoke with somebody today, and looking at the questions that they answer when they book a call with me, I ask you know, what do you hope to get out of this call?
1:03
Nicole Laino: And a lot of times they will say, you know, I want to know my purpose.
1:06
Nicole Laino: I think it's a very human thing.
1:08
Nicole Laino: And we've certainly talked about purpose on the show a lot.
1:11
Nicole Laino: But something that I noticed recently, specifically working with the clients that are in business by design right now, I've noticed just a new way that I'm kind of guiding them through this because it is a bit of a. I don't want to call it a complete red herring when you're chasing your purpose, but it's just so often that's not the way that it shows up.
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Nicole Laino: Seeing it saying like, okay, and you've heard me say this before on the show.
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Nicole Laino: If you listen often, which.
1:40
Nicole Laino: Thank you.
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Nicole Laino: If you do that, your purpose is in a destination on a map where you're like, okay, there it is.
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Nicole Laino: Let's go get it now.
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Nicole Laino: That's not how it works.
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Nicole Laino: At least not how I've seen it work.
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Nicole Laino: Purpose shows up.
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Nicole Laino: And something that I've noticed where I see a lot of people get stuck is that purpose can kind of work.
1:58
Nicole Laino: Like the way the human design kind of works through you.
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Nicole Laino: It's almost in, like, a backwards way.
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Nicole Laino: And I want to show you how misalignment and the signals that we get when we are misaligned, what they're really showing us, how they're actually gifts and how they are guiding you back to your purpose.
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Nicole Laino: If you don't get caught in how crummy it feels or how you wish it were different or get stuck in your head about thinking that, oh, this feels so bad.
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Nicole Laino: I'm stuck in this rut.
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Nicole Laino: I'll never get out of it.
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Nicole Laino: I'm further away from my purpose.
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Nicole Laino: Like, that's often where people end up.
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Nicole Laino: And I want to show you that if you shift your perspective, if you look at it almost a little bit backwards, that misalignment can guide you and make you feel more held and.
2:43
Nicole Laino: And more guided and more on track than you did even before you felt misaligned.
2:51
Nicole Laino: Okay, so I'm going to unpack all of this in today's episode.
2:55
Nicole Laino: So I hope that you're excited for it because I think that this is a fresh take.
2:58
Nicole Laino: I haven't heard anyone talk about it this way.
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Nicole Laino: And this is just something that I've noticed has really shifted people as I've started to guide them this way.
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Nicole Laino: Before we get started, I do want to call out that we have a really special offer that is out there right now.
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Nicole Laino: This is something that brand new that I have just unveiled, and I'm very excited about it because this is how I've really longed to work with people for a very long time.
3:21
Nicole Laino: I've thought about how do I combine private coaching and the results that I get for people where I get to be really intimate with them, I get to really understand them, I get to only be focused on them.
3:31
Nicole Laino: And we get to have really tailored and private focused time together, where we get to have integration over time.
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Nicole Laino: Where I'm kind of coaching in your pocket, I'm in their pocket, where they can ask me questions whenever they want.
3:46
Nicole Laino: How do I get that level of support, but even more, where we get even greater results and even less time.
3:55
Nicole Laino: And what I came up with that I'm so excited about are these private retreats that I'm going to be hosting here in Austin, Texas.
4:04
Nicole Laino: So these private retreats are going to be completely tailored to the people who book them.
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Nicole Laino: This will be, if you want to focus on 70% business and 30% personal, we can do that.
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Nicole Laino: If you want to work on your funnels and your podcast rebranding and your messaging, plus diving into your purpose and working through your trauma through deconditioning tools that I use, all of that, anything that I do is on the table.
4:30
Nicole Laino: And you pick your goal and your intention, and I curate an entire experience around it that includes all the time with me, but then also with other practitioners and other people here that I have relationships with that I think might make for an experience that is both transformative and enjoyable for the individual.
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Nicole Laino: So no two will be exactly alike.
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Nicole Laino: They will be completely different.
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Nicole Laino: And, you know, we're putting you up in a really beautiful place on the lake.
5:02
Nicole Laino: It's a really exciting offer.
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Nicole Laino: This is the type of transformation that I have been longing to be able to do with people is like, how do I get you?
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Nicole Laino: How do I take you out of your life for a couple of days?
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Nicole Laino: So these are two day retreats.
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Nicole Laino: There is a private call with me prior to the retreat.
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Nicole Laino: So it's a session before the two day retreat where we dive deep and then one month of vox or coaching for integration after the retreat.
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Nicole Laino: So you're kind of taken care of on both sides.
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Nicole Laino: And then we really go deep on the two days that we are together.
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Nicole Laino: I'm so excited about it.
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Nicole Laino: If you're interested in applying for one of these spots, please just go to nicolelaino.com forward/retreat.
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Nicole Laino: You'll see there's a forum there or DM me the word retreat on Instagram and we will send you the form link there.
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Nicole Laino: Okay, so let's talk about purpose.
5:51
Nicole Laino: Let's talk about the backwards way that your human design purpose is kind of knocking on your door.
5:56
Nicole Laino: All right, so we know we have these misalignment themes.
5:59
Nicole Laino: We know that we have the type misalignment themes.
6:01
Nicole Laino: We have a signature and a not self theme.
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Nicole Laino: So for generators, it's frustration.
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Nicole Laino: For manifesting generators, it's frustration and anger.
6:11
Nicole Laino: For manifestors, it's anger.
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Nicole Laino: For reflectors, it's disappointment.
6:15
Nicole Laino: And for projectors, it's bitterness.
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Nicole Laino: Those are our not self themes by type.
6:19
Nicole Laino: But then we have all of the centers, and the centers have not self themes or not self voices as we kind of speak to it.
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Nicole Laino: The open head is always saying, the answers are outside of me.
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Nicole Laino: How do I consume more?
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Nicole Laino: There are not self strategies that each of the centers have.
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Nicole Laino: So we have all of these things, right?
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Nicole Laino: And we can get stuck in these places in these misalignment themes.
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Nicole Laino: So what human design does that I think it's better at than any other modality out there is it gets you paying attention to these particular misalignment themes for yourself.
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Nicole Laino: So if you're a manifesto, you're gonna become really aware of what makes you angry and how angry you get.
7:04
Nicole Laino: Now, prior to understanding human design, you might get angry and just suppress it.
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Nicole Laino: You might get angry and not know what to do with it.
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Nicole Laino: That's what I call autopilot, because you're just getting taken for a ride by your conditioning.
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Nicole Laino: You're getting taken for a ride by your misalignment theme.
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Nicole Laino: You don't know what it is.
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Nicole Laino: You don't know why it's happening.
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Nicole Laino: And more importantly, you don't know what it's trying to tell you.
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Nicole Laino: Misalignment themes are not there to make your life difficult or less enjoyable, although that is usually the effect.
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Nicole Laino: They are there to realign you.
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Nicole Laino: They are there to guide you back to your purpose.
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Nicole Laino: But, of course, you need to know that the guardrails exist.
7:49
Nicole Laino: You need to know that there's.
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Nicole Laino: You know, if you were just like, the visual I get of this right now, this, like, analogy that I get is like, if you were just running down a trail and there were these people that were running alongside of you to make sure that you didn't veer off into the woods, and they were there for your protection, and they were there to keep you on the path, right?
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Nicole Laino: So you're running and you're running, but you don't know what these people are there for.
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Nicole Laino: You have no idea what their job is.
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Nicole Laino: You don't know that they're there for you.
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Nicole Laino: You're just like, there are these people running alongside of me, and every time I try to turn, they punch me in the face.
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Nicole Laino: You wouldn't be thinking like, oh, they're trying to help me.
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Nicole Laino: And I think that's how these misalignment themes can be Sometimes, you know, you feel like you're getting punched in the face and you don't know why, and you're trying to figure it out.
8:34
Nicole Laino: And then you get really preoccupied with trying to figure out why they're punching you in the face, and you keep running into them, and you keep trying to figure it out.
8:42
Nicole Laino: You keep trying to get past them, and.
8:43
Nicole Laino: And they're like, no, no, stay on the path.
8:45
Nicole Laino: I'm trying to push you back to the path.
8:47
Nicole Laino: It's a weird analogy, but that's the one that came to me as I was talking.
8:50
Nicole Laino: But do you see how.
8:51
Nicole Laino: What I mean, that if you don't know that this is happening and you don't know what the purpose is, it just feels like pain.
8:58
Nicole Laino: It just feels like something in your way that you've got to get past, that you got to get over.
9:02
Nicole Laino: So when you start to understand what these misalignment themes are, and you know what their purpose is, which is to realign you, to get you back on your path.
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Nicole Laino: They're not there to punish you for getting it wrong.
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Nicole Laino: And I think that's where I see this a lot with people who get involved with human design.
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Nicole Laino: And now they know I'm not supposed to feel this way, but they can get really stuck in blaming themselves, like, I don't know how to get out of it.
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Nicole Laino: What do I do?
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Nicole Laino: That's more mind stuff.
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Nicole Laino: Usually you're trying to mentally figure your way out of it, and that's not how we do it.
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Nicole Laino: Even people that I work with closely, I still have to remind them all the time.
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Nicole Laino: That's not your strategy.
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Nicole Laino: That's not what you follow.
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Nicole Laino: That's not how you find success.
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Nicole Laino: You're a generator.
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Nicole Laino: You have to do it differently than that.
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Nicole Laino: By the way, no one's strategy is to think about it more.
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Nicole Laino: Even mental projectors, that's not their way either of making decisions or finding their path.
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Nicole Laino: It's different.
10:01
Nicole Laino: So it does help us find our way.
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Nicole Laino: And sometimes it helps us find our way by showing us that we are not finding our way, that we are on the wrong path.
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Nicole Laino: So when it comes to purpose, ultimately your design is trying to show you what your path is to your purpose.
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Nicole Laino: Because your purpose is what you're here for in this life.
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Nicole Laino: And the world needs you in exactly the way that you were designed.
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Nicole Laino: For some reason, God, the universe thought that they needed that the world needed one more five one Emotional Manifesting Generator.
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Nicole Laino: Me, under the cross of Dominion.
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Nicole Laino: I was needed for something.
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Nicole Laino: I still don't know exactly what that is, but I know that I'm not too far off from it because I'm not in my misalignment theme.
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Nicole Laino: But I trust that I don't need to know exactly what it is.
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Nicole Laino: I trust that it'll show up if I stay in this process.
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Nicole Laino: So your purpose, you're being guided on your path because the world needs you to be exactly who you were designed to be.
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Nicole Laino: When you're in alignment, your purpose shows up for you and through you.
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Nicole Laino: So when you're out of alignment, it doesn't.
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Nicole Laino: But it does kind of when you're out of alignment, it's showing you that when you're misaligned, you're resisting your purpose.
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Nicole Laino: So that misalignment, how it's guiding you back to your path is it's showing you a lot of times where you are resisting your purpose.
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Nicole Laino: So when I've started to coach people through this, I can call this out.
11:41
Nicole Laino: It's just because I can see it.
11:42
Nicole Laino: Because I know design so well.
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Nicole Laino: So when they're speaking to me and I'm like, I'm hearing the shadow of their conscious sun.
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Nicole Laino: I'm hearing the shadow of their purpose.
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Nicole Laino: I'm hearing the shadow of this.
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Nicole Laino: And I can call them out on those pieces.
11:55
Nicole Laino: And I've just been noticing it the pattern I've seen is so often the shadow of that conscious sun, which is what leads your purpose.
12:04
Nicole Laino: So you're resisting a gift.
12:08
Nicole Laino: And when you resist a gift, it causes a shadow to express.
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Nicole Laino: If you can start to see this, people tend to, you know, I sort of see this.
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Nicole Laino: Like, when you're on your own and you're doing this all by yourself and you're trying to digest all of the human design knowledge that there is, you're listening to podcasts, you're taking it all in, you're paying attention, you're doing it all.
12:31
Nicole Laino: But you can get stuck in trying to figure it all out, and it can get really confusing.
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Nicole Laino: And the visual I get for this is like, if you are stuck in the mud and you just kept hitting the gas, but the wheels are spinning, and that's what happens.
12:46
Nicole Laino: You know, you get stuck in this rut where you're just.
12:49
Nicole Laino: You're hitting the gas and you're like, why am I not going?
12:50
Nicole Laino: Why am I not going?
12:51
Nicole Laino: Why am I not going?
12:52
Nicole Laino: I see this so often with people.
12:54
Nicole Laino: There's something about me or someone like me.
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Nicole Laino: I'm not saying it has to be me, but someone like me coming in and saying, do you see how this is actually a shadow expression of your main gift?
13:06
Nicole Laino: Do you see how you might be resisting your purpose here by getting caught in this pattern instead of aligning with this one?
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Nicole Laino: Do you see how you're trying to think your way out of this, but you're a generator, and if you're not following your energy and where it wants to go, you're going to get more of this, which is exactly what's happening.
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Nicole Laino: There's something about being able to explain that to people and show them what's happening.
13:30
Nicole Laino: Show them that process that causes them to stop hitting that gas where the wheels are spinning in the mud.
13:38
Nicole Laino: It causes them to go, oh, maybe I don't have to fight so hard to get out of this.
13:43
Nicole Laino: It opens them up that there's a new way.
13:45
Nicole Laino: And I don't want you to underestimate how powerful that is, because in your mind, it's like, there's only one way.
13:50
Nicole Laino: And when you're in fight or flight, that one way really feels like the only way.
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Nicole Laino: And it feels like you will exert every ounce of energy and effort that you have to move in that direction, because this is life or death.
14:04
Nicole Laino: That's how it can feel sometimes.
14:06
Nicole Laino: But when someone can come in and kind of show you.
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Nicole Laino: I see myself as somebody who.
14:12
Nicole Laino: And people who do work like this when you can point out the pattern and you can actually give somebody a process for finding their way out of it's almost like they're borrowing you to help them become the observer.
14:27
Nicole Laino: That's a saying in mindset work, in, you know, growth work, you hear this.
14:32
Nicole Laino: The goal is to become the observer of your thoughts, the observer of your behavior.
14:38
Nicole Laino: When we're in it, we're in the weeds.
14:41
Nicole Laino: We are in the moment.
14:43
Nicole Laino: And it's hard to see.
14:45
Nicole Laino: This is that it's hard to read the label from inside the bottle.
14:48
Nicole Laino: The goal is to be able to zoom out and be able to see what you're doing and see it for what it is, not from the place of being in your body and being so in it that you lose that perspective.
15:01
Nicole Laino: Coaches, third parties, particularly ones that are neutral and don't have any skin in that game in the sense of, you know, family can have their own agendas and their own feelings and things like that.
15:14
Nicole Laino: But when you have a impartial third party that can come in there and say, pull you up to their perspective and say, can you see what I see?
15:24
Nicole Laino: If you zoom out, Can I zoom you out with me and show you what's happening?
15:28
Nicole Laino: Let me show you a bit of what this looked like going forward.
15:32
Nicole Laino: Let me show you where you're misaligned, and let me show you how you can correct that.
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Nicole Laino: Can you see?
15:38
Nicole Laino: It's so valuable.
15:40
Nicole Laino: So I hope that you found this helpful.
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Nicole Laino: I hope that you found this insightful to see how the next time you find yourself in one of the misalignment themes, when you find yourself face to face with the not self and you realize that it's been driving you, ask yourself, how is this realigning me to my path by seeing this now?
15:59
Nicole Laino: How am I able to see where I need to shift my energy or my focus?
16:05
Nicole Laino: And if you're interested in doing one of the private retreats with me, applying for that again, these are going to be exclusive offers that I am so excited to work on with the people who sign up, because we get to do everything that I just said.
16:20
Nicole Laino: I get to watch you, I get to help guide you.
16:22
Nicole Laino: I get to go deep with you.
16:23
Nicole Laino: We get to decondition.
16:25
Nicole Laino: When I think about what I can do with somebody if I had them for a session, plus two days, plus a month, I am, like, on fire about that.
16:33
Nicole Laino: So if you want to know more about the retreats and you want to apply, please go to nicolelaino.com retreat.
16:39
Nicole Laino: You can fill out the application there or just DM me the word retreat on Instagram and we'll send you the form there.
16:46
Nicole Laino: Thank you so much for being here.
16:48
Nicole Laino: I appreciate you.
16:49
Nicole Laino: And remember, in order to have an unshakable business, you must first become an unshakable human.
16:54
Nicole Laino: So thanks for letting us help you become unshakable with human Design.
16:57
Nicole Laino: We'll see you next time.
16:59
Nicole Laino: If you love this episode and you're.
17:00
Nicole Laino: A fan of the show, please show us the love on itunes, Spotify, or wherever you're listening to the show and leave us a review.
17:06
Nicole Laino: And if you'd like to connect with other entrepreneurs on their human design journey, join our free Facebook community, Human Design for Entrepreneurs.
17:13
Nicole Laino: Go to nicolelaino Me Podcastlinks to join the group.
17:17
Nicole Laino: Book a human design reading with me or access our free human design resources.
17:22
Nicole Laino: We'll see you there.