Latest / ok storytime / I encouraged my boyfriend to CHASE his DREAM and it cost me our relationship! | Reddit Stories | EP3098

Transcript

I encouraged my boyfriend to CHASE his DREAM and it cost me our relationship! | Reddit Stories | EP3098 · ok storytime

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Riley. And this is Keon, your favorite
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: OK Storytime host. And we've got some great stories coming up.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: But before we get.
• 0:06
  Speaker 3: To that, we have a quick two minute break from
• 0:09
  Speaker 3: the sponsors that keep the show alive.
• 0:11
  Speaker 4: I encouraged my boyfriend to chase his dream and it
• 0:14
  Speaker 4: cost me our relationship.
• 0:16
  Speaker 3: So it cost everything.
• 0:17
  Speaker 4: My boyfriend, 26 male, and I, 27 female, have been
• 0:20
  Speaker 4: through some trying times over the past four years. And
• 0:24
  Speaker 4: through it all, we've been each other's support. We compliment
• 0:27
  Speaker 4: each other so well. Long story short.
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: He's the love of my life.
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: L-O-M-L.
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: L-O-M-L.
• 0:34
  Speaker 4: When we first met, he was unemployed after recently quitting
• 0:36
  Speaker 4: his job as an EMT. He needs a break after that.
• 0:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah, dude, that is traumatizing.
• 0:42
  Speaker 4: He said he was unsatisfied because he didn't feel like
• 0:45
  Speaker 4: it was for him and was searching for direction. He
• 0:48
  Speaker 4: mentioned before that he's always had a passion for cooking.
• 0:50
  Speaker 4: So I urged him to follow his gut. You should
• 0:52
  Speaker 4: say follow your stomach and do what would bring him happiness.
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: And tomato, tomato.
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: Your taste buds, follow your tongue.
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: Whoa, that'll get you in dangerous places.
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I encouraged him to enroll in culinary school. The CIA.
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: I had to make the joke again.
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: I forgot.
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: Since then, he's moved up quickly.
• 1:12
  Speaker 4: And after graduating and two years in the industry, he
• 1:15
  Speaker 4: opened a hot new restaurant as a sous chef.
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: They call it The Bear.
• 1:20
  Speaker 3: They call it Hell's Kitchen.
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: Oh, no. They call him Gordon Ramsay. Gord's son, Ramsay.
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: We've seen Gordon Ramsay go into these restaurants.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah. We should get him on the podcast. Wow.
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: We should also get Ofa Renfri on the podcast.
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: Oprah Winfrey.
• 1:34
  Speaker 3: Oprah Winfrey.
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: He's really coming alive since switching industry. He got this
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: fiery energy, this sparkle in his eyes when talking about
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: the action in the kitchen, new recipes he's coming up with,
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: or dreams of opening his own restaurant.
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: This is the bear.
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: He's like, wow, this could be me. I have a
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: little rat on my head who is helping me live
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: all my dreams.
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: Now we got another animal we're talking about.
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: You thought I'm throwing all the cooking movies out. I'm
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: just adding more. All right, all right. Throw another cooking
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: movie in.
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: Do the one with Scarlett Johansson, then.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: Wait, was that the one with Favreau, Chef? Is Scarlett
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: Johansson in that one?
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: You know everything. You got it.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: Chef. Yes!
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: Yes, you got it! Yes! I literally said, is that
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: that one with Jon Favreau, Chef?
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: You didn't say that.
• 2:15
  Speaker 4: I did!
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: You just said that one with Jon Favreau.
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: Roll it back! Roll it back!
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: Roll it back! She just said, isn't that movie with
• 2:21
  Speaker 3: Jon Favreau?
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: I literally said that. And then you didn't say anything.
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: J-O-N?
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: I literally said chef.
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: I know. No, you didn't. She said Jon Favreau. Look
• 2:29
  Speaker 3: it back. Guys, guys, who's right? Me or what?
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: So I'm going to play it back.
• 2:32
  Speaker 3: Chad will play it back for us. Who's right? Say
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: Sophia's right or Riley's right.
• 2:35
  Speaker 4: I'm extremely proud of his accomplishments. And seeing this amazing
• 2:39
  Speaker 4: passion he has for what he does makes me.
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: Love him even more.
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: What makes him love you even less. he inspires me
• 2:45
  Speaker 4: to follow my dreams by the way this comes from
• 2:47
  Speaker 4: deleted and if you want to submit your own stories
• 2:50
  Speaker 4: go to the r slash okay story time subreddit i
• 2:52
  Speaker 4: am sophia i'm And if you've got answers, give them
• 2:58
  Speaker 4: here right now. And if you've got recipes, give them here.
• 3:00
  Speaker 4: Because this story is about chefs, Opie says. The thing is,
• 3:03
  Speaker 4: I had no idea how demanding his career would be.
• 3:06
  Speaker 4: You've never seen a movie about chefs.
• 3:09
  Speaker 3: You've never seen Gordon Ramsay. You've never seen Ratatouille. You've
• 3:11
  Speaker 3: never seen Chef.
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: Is it cake? Is it cake?
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: The one with Bradley Cooper?
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: I don't know which one you're talking about.
• 3:20
  Speaker 3: He says Burger King's a really good restaurant because they're consistent.
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: I don't know what that is.
• 3:24
  Speaker 4: I've never worked in the restaurant industry and I've never
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: personally met another chef before I started dating one. He
• 3:30
  Speaker 4: works crazy hours, 70, sometimes 80 hours a week. We
• 3:34
  Speaker 4: don't live together and I only see him for a
• 3:36
  Speaker 4: few hours on the weekends when I can stay up late.
• 3:39
  Speaker 4: Half that time we're asleep because it's three in the morning.
• 3:42
  Speaker 4: I'm sleepy and he's exhausted. He's got one day off
• 3:44
  Speaker 4: a week, if that, which is pretty much the only
• 3:47
  Speaker 4: time he has to relax. Catch up with family, friends
• 3:49
  Speaker 4: and me. I'm a nine to fiver and I'm asleep
• 3:51
  Speaker 4: by the time he gets off work. I speak to
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: him twice a day if I'm lucky. Once in the morning,
• 3:56
  Speaker 4: which is a rushed five minute conversation since I'm at work.
• 3:59
  Speaker 4: and once in the evening when he gets off work,
• 4:01
  Speaker 4: which I hardly even remember because I'm asleep and only
• 4:04
  Speaker 4: half conscious. We can't text while he's working, which is
• 4:07
  Speaker 4: all the time. He works every holiday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's,
• 4:11
  Speaker 4: Valentine's Day, are all busy restaurant days. Birthdays and anniversaries.
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: Are not guaranteed off either.
• 4:17
  Speaker 4: Through it all, I've been super supportive. I've gotten kind
• 4:20
  Speaker 4: of used to him not being around. I've taken up
• 4:23
  Speaker 4: yoga and kickboxing and have started reading way more books
• 4:26
  Speaker 4: and watching way more movies. I mean, it's really cool
• 4:28
  Speaker 4: that OP is not being, you know, demoralized by this
• 4:32
  Speaker 4: huge change in their relationship.
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: Imagine having a 12 piece puzzle and one of the
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: pieces is broken in half.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: No, of course it's hard.
• 4:39
  Speaker 3: It's like, oh, it's almost there. It's just, I got,
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: I have that piece of the puzzle, but the other
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: half of that piece is gone.
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: I'm almost complete.
• 4:47
  Speaker 4: But I think it's impressive that OP is not just
• 4:49
  Speaker 4: kind of wallowing in this.
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna be real. What organ?
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: Or orange. Orange.
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: Stick.
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: How many more?
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: Kick. I just discovered this just now and it's the
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: best thing ever.
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: To be honest, we're going through the same thing right now.
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you have to adjust to like new hours and
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: stuff and you have to find a way. When we
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: were in Bali, that was because we were on totally
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: different time zones and that was so hard and you
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: have to like figure out how to like communicate and stuff.
• 5:18
  Speaker 3: That's like three weeks. I know that was hard. That
• 5:20
  Speaker 3: must have been tough. It's Angie's new job. It's like, when?
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: You have to find new ways to communicate. When will
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: it end? When you don't know when the end is.
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: So I feel you, OP. I'm the nine to fiver.
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: I've even kind of gotten used to going to parties
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: and events alone. Most days are okay.
• 5:36
  Speaker 4: I keep myself so busy with friends and hobbies that
• 5:38
  Speaker 4: I sometimes forget I miss him so much. But other
• 5:42
  Speaker 4: days are horrible. Yesterday, he told me he made plans
• 5:45
  Speaker 4: to see his friends in the evening when they got
• 5:47
  Speaker 4: off work. After we hung up, I broke down in
• 5:49
  Speaker 4: tears because I had been looking forward to seeing him
• 5:52
  Speaker 4: all week.
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: But I can't even be mad.
• 5:54
  Speaker 4: It's his only free day, and it's not fair for
• 5:57
  Speaker 4: me to take up all his time. We hardly ever
• 5:59
  Speaker 4: have spicy sleep. There's just no time and no energy.
• 6:02
  Speaker 4: When we do spend time together on those rare Mondays,
• 6:05
  Speaker 4: we don't go out because he's so tired. I cherish
• 6:08
  Speaker 4: these moments just cuddled up on the couch because they
• 6:10
  Speaker 4: don't happen often. I don't speak to him about my
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: feelings of loneliness because I don't want to burden him
• 6:14
  Speaker 4: with my emotions on his sole day of relaxation, especially
• 6:18
  Speaker 4: since that's just the nature of the industry and he
• 6:20
  Speaker 4: can't do anything about it. You have to talk to
• 6:24
  Speaker 4: him about it, though.
• 6:24
  Speaker 3: It's tough.
• 6:25
  Speaker 4: You have to talk about those feelings.
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: How long ago did he start this? Do we know?
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: I think it's been at least a couple months. Yeah.
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: Maybe half a year. I'm not sure.
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: I don't remember.
• 6:33
  Speaker 3: Because I remember working here at the beginning of it.
• 6:35
  Speaker 3: First year and a half was a lot of hours. Yeah.
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: And then we built something and it was like, oh,
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: we can.
• 6:40
  Speaker 4: Unfortunately, unless he became like the owner of a restaurant.
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: I mean, even then he might be working constantly.
• 6:46
  Speaker 3: I don't know. I'd like to know how much steak
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: he has and how his customers are doing. All these things.
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: This is the guy I want to grow old with
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: and have babies with. He's the one with whom I
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: want to share the future.
• 6:55
  Speaker 4: But then I think about how I feel on days
• 6:58
  Speaker 4: like today, and I wonder if his career will ever
• 7:00
  Speaker 4: allow him to be present. Am I okay with eating
• 7:03
  Speaker 4: every meal and spending every holiday alone? Can I take
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: on the responsibilities of the household and raising children essentially
• 7:10
  Speaker 4: like a single parent? Can I deal with him only
• 7:12
  Speaker 4: being home long enough to sleep? We're planning on moving
• 7:14
  Speaker 4: in together within the next six months. I'm not sure
• 7:17
  Speaker 4: if this will help our relationship or just prolong the inevitable.
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: Maybe both.
• 7:22
  Speaker 4: It's been tough and I know it will only get tougher.
• 7:24
  Speaker 4: I love him so much, but I don't know if
• 7:27
  Speaker 4: I'm strong enough. I have to figure out what it
• 7:29
  Speaker 4: is I need and I'm terrified at the thought.
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: That maybe he can't give it to me. Just thinking
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: about leaving him over the career I pushed him toward
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: makes me feel sick to my stomach. And we do
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: have relevant comments. But what do you think? What's the
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: solution here?
• 7:43
  Speaker 3: Manda Shmanda, I worked in the restaurant industry 13 years.
• 7:46
  Speaker 3: It's definitely not for the week. I used to work
• 7:48
  Speaker 3: 60 to 70 hours every week until my son told
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: me I worked too much. I cut it in half
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: and took the office position. No, it is.
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: It is like such a tough job. It's such.
• 7:59
  Speaker 4: And like people generally awful to you.
• 8:01
  Speaker 3: That's true.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 8:03
  Speaker 4: There's just kind of the idea environment has to be
• 8:07
  Speaker 4: so like.
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: What's the word? pumpkin the word is not pumpkin.
• 8:10
  Speaker 3: It has to be so go go go go go
• 8:12
  Speaker 3: yeah it's like new york.
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: You know we gotta keep going gotta keep.
• 8:17
  Speaker 3: Moving never stop moving if.
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: I'm if i say please then the whole restaurant will
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: burn down dude.
• 8:24
  Speaker 3: Some of those restaurant videos i see where everyone's in
• 8:27
  Speaker 3: unison it's a beehive yes chef okay chef.
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: No, I was watching this one.
• 8:31
  Speaker 4: My boyfriend was showing me this one cooking video of
• 8:33
  Speaker 4: this guy and he was working on just one stovetop.
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: And literally the amount of things he was managing.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: Oh, yes.
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: He was insane. He's like, it's like actively burning. Yeah,
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: it's like actively burning. And then he grabs like the
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: sauces and then he's plating the sauces. And then he's like, OK,
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: I got to go back to the thing and put that.
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: But it's like literally he looks like he has eight arms.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: He's like an octopus.
• 8:54
  Speaker 3: It has to be a toxic environment to make the
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: food toxic. What? These freaking chefs.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: Cookie.
• 9:01
  Speaker 3: I'm about to throw you into a restaurant.
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: This is what you get for putting me behind in here.
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: Dude, I just wanted one story over here.
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: You just wanted one story, Savannah. Look at him. He's crying.
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: Look at him.
• 9:11
  Speaker 3: And the story is- Look at him! I can't close
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: this home.
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: I don't want this story.
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: Apple? Wait, no, this is, this is, this is Riley's- Wait, Riley.
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: Oh my God, another thing.
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: Say that again, Riley.
• 9:23
  Speaker 5: What?
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: This is the- Wait, have that heartfelt thought again.
• 9:26
  Speaker 3: This is hitting too close to home. I don't want
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: to be reading this story. I try to open up here.
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: I try to be vulnerable. And this is how the
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: women treat me here.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: It's so good though. That's my favorite thing now. Dabger
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: Dan says, talk to him.
• 9:45
  Speaker 4: He may already have a plan for transitioning out of
• 9:47
  Speaker 4: the 70 to 80 hour weeks, or at least be
• 9:49
  Speaker 4: open to coming up with one. Hope he says I
• 9:51
  Speaker 4: brought this up to him before. Just not every time
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: I'm upset. It always ends with him saying, I'm sorry,
• 9:56
  Speaker 4: but this is how it's going to be. Can you
• 9:58
  Speaker 4: handle that?
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: No.
• 9:59
  Speaker 4: He did say that things are extra crazy because he's
• 10:01
  Speaker 4: putting in his time and opening a new restaurant. But
• 10:04
  Speaker 4: essentially being a chef means long.
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: Hours and little time for us.
• 10:08
  Speaker 4: That's why Carmy and the bear doesn't have a girlfriend
• 10:12
  Speaker 4: by the end of one of those seasons.
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: I don't remember which one.
• 10:15
  Speaker 3: He'll get the girl in the last one.
• 10:17
  Speaker 4: By season two, I've only seen up to season two,
• 10:19
  Speaker 4: and he loses his girlfriend because he's so focused on this.
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: And it seems like that's where he's going.
• 10:24
  Speaker 3: Truth be told.
• 10:26
  Speaker 4: OP says to all the long comments about one Redditor's
• 10:30
  Speaker 4: boyfriend who worked nonstop, chefs who take substances and ultimately
• 10:33
  Speaker 4: burn out. Most of the time we have spent together
• 10:35
  Speaker 4: is spent sleeping. I take what I can get, but
• 10:37
  Speaker 4: I'm having a hard time convincing myself that it's enough.
• 10:40
  Speaker 4: My boyfriend is already on the caffeine and nicotine. He's
• 10:44
  Speaker 4: a freaking chef. Of course, he's outside on his breaks.
• 10:47
  Speaker 4: I think the job requires it.
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: I mean, there's a whole plot about leaving a cigarette on.
• 10:52
  Speaker 3: So you have four years of experience cooking, been at
• 10:55
  Speaker 3: three restaurants.
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: You've been smoking since you were 14?
• 10:58
  Speaker 3: Can I see your pack of cigs? What do you
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: got here?
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: American Spirits.
• 11:02
  Speaker 3: All right, great. What's your preferred intake of caffeine? Ah,
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: Perfect Monster. Ah, that's White Monster. You should probably upgrade
• 11:09
  Speaker 3: to the green one. Okay, there we go. All right,
• 11:11
  Speaker 3: you're hired.
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: And you have a tragic family past. Are your parents divorced?
• 11:14
  Speaker 3: Did your uncle touch you? Okay, great.
• 11:17
  Speaker 5: You're in.
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: You're in. This is perfect.
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: Caterpillar.
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: That's not even food!
• 11:21
  Speaker 5: That's a bug!
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: I don't like that.
• 11:24
  Speaker 4: I've just started to realize what it would mean for
• 11:25
  Speaker 4: our relationship and future family if he was to stay
• 11:28
  Speaker 4: in the industry, which he plans to. I think I've
• 11:30
  Speaker 4: been blinded by the glamour of it all. My boyfriend
• 11:32
  Speaker 4: is an awesome chef. The restaurant is so good that
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: I haven't realized what his career has been doing to
• 11:38
  Speaker 4: our relationship. Thanks for your response. I've got some hard
• 11:42
  Speaker 4: questions to ask. Do we think they're going to stay together? Riley,
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: first thought, immediate, yes or no, stay together.
• 11:48
  Speaker 5: Oh i don't like this story oh i don't like
• 11:51
  Speaker 5: it i do think if they moved in it would
• 11:53
  Speaker 5: help i agree i actually agree in this situation because
• 11:58
  Speaker 5: not only not always do i think just like moving
• 12:00
  Speaker 5: in fixes things.
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: But it immediately allows you guys to see each other
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: way more than you.
• 12:05
  Speaker 3: Would that is true whenever savannah moved closer to us
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: we saw her way more no i know i.
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: Just work here now that's why you see me that's a.
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: Really good point oh my gosh Okay, she doesn't work
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: here anymore. One more of those and she might not.
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: Four days later.
• 12:20
  Speaker 3: Savannah, do you think they stay together?
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: Truthfully, I don't see it working just because they're just
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: in different places and it's not anyone's fault. But that's
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: not true for everyone. Yeah, life is just too demanding
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: right now.
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: Sometimes it just has to be them versus the problem,
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: not them against each other.
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: Exactly. But the issue here, the issue here is not.
• 12:38
  Speaker 4: That they have this huge problem that is impossible to
• 12:41
  Speaker 4: solve because there is a solution.
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: He is not willing to hear it. And as long
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: as you communicate, because he's like, well, it's just how
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: it is. And as long as you communicate and you say, hey, like,
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: what can we do? to have like maybe that maybe
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: the solution here is okay well i know you're busy
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: constantly but maybe we have.
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: Dinner one night you know maybe we have a movie
• 13:01
  Speaker 4: night yeah oh my god maybe we have a movie
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: night maybe like every two months we go on a
• 13:05
  Speaker 4: trip good point you have something to look forward to
• 13:07
  Speaker 4: four days later.
• 13:08
  Speaker 3: Update i do make it meaningful jen thompson i just
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: don't have enough of it.
• 13:13
  Speaker 4: Not sure how many people have seen my previous post,
• 13:15
  Speaker 4: but I figured I'd cater to those who commented and
• 13:18
  Speaker 4: seem to genuinely care about our situation. We finally had
• 13:21
  Speaker 4: our much needed conversation last night. I felt horrible for
• 13:25
  Speaker 4: bringing up such heavy topics right after he came home
• 13:28
  Speaker 4: from work, stressed and exhausted, but it's the only time
• 13:31
  Speaker 4: we have. I asked him the big questions. What is
• 13:34
  Speaker 4: your five-year career plan? Can you realistically work in a
• 13:37
  Speaker 4: kitchen for the rest of your life?
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: Is that what you want?
• 13:40
  Speaker 4: And at the mention of working in a kitchen for
• 13:41
  Speaker 4: the rest of his life, behind eyelids drooping with exhaustion
• 13:45
  Speaker 4: and the dark bags under them came the sparkle and
• 13:48
  Speaker 4: fire that I adore and feared would appear during this conversation.
• 13:53
  Speaker 4: I want to run my own kitchen. I want to
• 13:55
  Speaker 4: own my own restaurant. I'm making a name for myself
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: and people are noticing I want this and I know
• 14:00
  Speaker 4: I can do it. And yes, it seems like he
• 14:04
  Speaker 4: wants this more than he wants your relationship. I asked
• 14:07
  Speaker 4: him if he realized what that meant in terms of
• 14:09
  Speaker 4: raising a family, which he always said he wanted.
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: He said it would stay like this.
• 14:13
  Speaker 4: 12 to 16 hour shifts every day, getting home after midnight.
• 14:18
  Speaker 4: His head hung down and told me we could make
• 14:20
  Speaker 4: it work. I could have breakfast with the family every morning,
• 14:23
  Speaker 4: take the kids.
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: To school, he suggested. I told him I needed more.
• 14:26
  Speaker 4: From a partner i want a normal life i want
• 14:29
  Speaker 4: to have dinner every night as a family i want
• 14:31
  Speaker 4: to read to our kids together at night i want
• 14:33
  Speaker 4: holidays and birthdays he told me he can't give me
• 14:36
  Speaker 4: any of that i was hoping and praying the entire
• 14:39
  Speaker 4: time that he would reformulate his career path maybe set
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: his eyes on a comparable goal that would make a
• 14:45
  Speaker 4: home life possible but there's no comparison in.
• 14:47
  Speaker 3: Life i've met people yeah people that love nine-to-fives people
• 14:51
  Speaker 3: who love to be an entrepreneur and sometimes people who
• 14:54
  Speaker 3: love to be an employee i don't really meet a
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: lot of those people People were just built for these things.
• 14:58
  Speaker 3: And he's built entrepeneur.
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: He's built to entrepeneur. Damn.
• 15:04
  Speaker 3: It's good that you're freaking this out now, but he
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: loves this drive. That's what he's built for.
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: It's his dream.
• 15:09
  Speaker 3: And someone made a really good point. He was an
• 15:11
  Speaker 3: EMT before this.
• 15:12
  Speaker 4: So he's got that. He knows that type of life.
• 15:14
  Speaker 4: He knows like the sleepless night. He wants like this
• 15:17
  Speaker 4: is kind of the vibe of a war veteran who
• 15:20
  Speaker 4: comes home and they like don't know how to adjust
• 15:23
  Speaker 4: because they've just been fighting.
• 15:24
  Speaker 3: They just want to keep.
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, they just want like that adrenaline rush.
• 15:27
  Speaker 3: Barry.
• 15:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 15:28
  Speaker 3: You seen Barry?
• 15:29
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: The first episode. But they're looking for the adrenaline rush. Yeah.
• 15:33
  Speaker 4: And that's what he's looking for. He's looking for something
• 15:35
  Speaker 4: that's quick and, like, constant and, like, there's stakes.
• 15:38
  Speaker 3: No, it is pretty fiery, I will say. I do
• 15:40
  Speaker 3: like keeping things running. I like keeping things running around
• 15:42
  Speaker 3: here in a very laid-back scenario. And it conflicts my
• 15:47
  Speaker 3: heart sometimes. I finish my sentence once it's done.
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: We have stakes. We actually have to ban you.
• 15:53
  Speaker 3: Give me the stream tech.
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: After hours of talking, we realized this just wouldn't work.
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: No!
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: If we stayed together, either I would resent him for
• 16:02
  Speaker 4: never being around, or he would resent me for making
• 16:05
  Speaker 4: me give up his dream. I would never strip him
• 16:08
  Speaker 4: of that. This is the most difficult thing I've ever.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: Had to do. I almost wish he was a cheating a-hole.
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: It would make moving on way easier.
• 16:14
  Speaker 3: Ah, I see.
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: But no, he's wonderful and has always been so good
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: to me.
• 16:18
  Speaker 3: Who's your ex?
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: What?
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: So who's your ex?
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: Gordon Ramsay.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: Cabbage.
• 16:22
  Speaker 3: Oh, he's going to have to live with that for
• 16:23
  Speaker 3: the rest of her life.
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: We're very much in love, and that's what makes this
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: whole thing so horrible.
• 16:27
  Speaker 4: I never envisioned a future without him. And he said
• 16:30
  Speaker 4: he always thought he'd be sharing life's successes with me.
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: I wish I could be the one standing next to
• 16:34
  Speaker 4: him through it all, but.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: I'm just not cut out for the life he's offering me.
• 16:39
  Speaker 3: Just become a sous chef. And he's the main chef.
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: And then you could work together. Have fun.
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: There you go.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 16:45
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 16:46
  Speaker 3: And a very laid back, low cortisol. Yes.
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: Work environment.
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: Bakery. We could work at a bakery. Low cortisol. And
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: although low cal, low cortisol.
• 16:57
  Speaker 3: Totally be alive.
• 16:58
  Speaker 4: And although I am glad we figured out our incompatibilities
• 17:01
  Speaker 4: before marriage and children, I'm still sad.
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: Additional information from our peak.
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: Dude, this is another multi-universe.
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 17:08
  Speaker 3: Multi-dimensional of La La Land.
• 17:11
  Speaker 4: Oh, this is like another alternate universe where La La
• 17:14
  Speaker 4: Land people are chefs. I've read so many similar stories
• 17:17
  Speaker 4: of a willing but overall absent chef dad.
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: Responses like yours helped.
• 17:20
  Speaker 4: Me realize that this isn't what I want for my
• 17:22
  Speaker 4: family and what his career would realistically do to our
• 17:25
  Speaker 4: home life.
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: I just wish it didn't have to be like this.
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: And thanks for sharing your experience. I would hate to
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: have to wait until retirement to be happy. I want
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: to enjoy my family every moment possible. I realize now
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: that my now.
• 17:37
  Speaker 4: Ex is eager to spend his life building something he's
• 17:40
  Speaker 4: proud of, which is so admirable but is willing to
• 17:43
  Speaker 4: miss many of those moments. I just came to the
• 17:45
  Speaker 4: realization that I need more of a family man. I
• 17:48
  Speaker 4: never knew that's what I was looking for until very recently.
• 17:51
  Speaker 4: He's always said he wanted a family. Oh, I just
• 17:53
  Speaker 4: didn't know he wanted his career more. it stings because
• 17:57
  Speaker 4: i see now he chose the kitchen over me but
• 18:00
  Speaker 4: i guess that's life and i just need to learn
• 18:02
  Speaker 4: to accept it i mean he chose his.
• 18:04
  Speaker 3: Dream i mean he chose a meal over a snack
• 18:07
  Speaker 3: that's tough.
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: Edit thank you everyone for the kind words the more
• 18:10
  Speaker 4: i read i know this breakup had to happen in
• 18:12
  Speaker 4: order for both of us to be happy with our
• 18:14
  Speaker 4: lives down the line i really appreciated the support i
• 18:17
  Speaker 4: received here for a little heartbroken me i never anticipated
• 18:20
  Speaker 4: that reddit would help me heal It is.
• 18:22
  Speaker 3: Kind of crazy how communities will come together and help you.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: But also tear you down.
• 18:27
  Speaker 3: Claire, she has a funny bit where she got called onto,
• 18:31
  Speaker 3: I think, NPR about a way people came together to
• 18:34
  Speaker 3: help her out. She's like, yeah, after I called off
• 18:35
  Speaker 3: my marriage, comic community in LA came together to help
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: me process it.
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 18:39
  Speaker 3: It's like a bunch of clowns like.
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: The clowns came together. This is a sad story, though.
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: This next one?
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: No, no, that one.
• 18:47
  Speaker 3: It scares me.
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: I truly believe that's going to be my life because
• 18:50
  Speaker 2: I'm always going to choose my career over.
• 18:52
  Speaker 3: This is your career. Yeah. You can't fit a relationship in. No,
• 18:55
  Speaker 3: I probably could.
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: But if they were to be like, it's either me
• 18:58
  Speaker 2: or that, this is.
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: If my partner came up to me, okay, story time
• 19:03
  Speaker 3: or me, I'm like, dude, okay, story time.
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 19:06
  Speaker 3: But if it's like, hey, could you work less at okay,
• 19:09
  Speaker 3: story time and hang out with me? That's, yeah.
• 19:11
  Speaker 4: My fiance's sister set us up out of pity and
• 19:14
  Speaker 4: threatened to tell him unless I confessed. I don't even
• 19:18
  Speaker 4: know what any of that means. I, 26 male, first
• 19:21
  Speaker 4: went out with my fiance, Sean, 25 male, when my,
• 19:24
  Speaker 4: at the time, best friend, Ruby, his sister, told me
• 19:27
  Speaker 4: that he was super lonely and asked me to go
• 19:29
  Speaker 4: out with him because I was the only attracted the
• 19:31
  Speaker 4: same gender guy around.
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: His age that she knew. Ooh, David the G. Well,
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: I owed her a major favor and also kind of
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: felt bad for him, to put it bluntly. He had
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: no friends. So I agreed and asked him to the movies.
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: What a terrible... Oh.
• 19:45
  Speaker 4: Man, like that's so sad if he ever finds this out,
• 19:48
  Speaker 4: which I think he might be finding this out.
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: It was pity date. That sucks. So bad and now, now,
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: now what's it going to be? Honestly, I was a
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: bit scared of him. He's 6'5 and muscular.
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: Oh. Too much butter to my lobster.
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: Oh, man. Well, I'm only 5'9, and not what you'd
• 20:06
  Speaker 2: call athletic.
• 20:07
  Speaker 5: Oh.
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: I figured I'd go on one date, then let him
• 20:09
  Speaker 4: down gently. He said yes, and we surprisingly had an
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: amazing time. It went so well that I actually ended
• 20:15
  Speaker 4: up going back to his apartment, getting shwasted while playing
• 20:18
  Speaker 4: Uno with him.
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: Um, fun. Druno. We love Druno.
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: Aw, and then he became Juno.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: If you know. Pregnant.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: Pregnant. Pregnant. Boom.
• 20:28
  Speaker 4: Turns out, in spite of the height difference and his
• 20:31
  Speaker 4: social anxiety, he's a great guy. And very sweet once
• 20:33
  Speaker 4: he opens up. Long story short, it's four years later
• 20:37
  Speaker 4: and we're getting married in a month.
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: Wow. By the way, this comes from Agile Mammoth. 9104.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: And if you want to submit your.
• 20:44
  Speaker 4: Own stories, go to the r slash showcase story time
• 20:46
  Speaker 4: subreddit and op says. Every time I say Ruby, I
• 20:49
  Speaker 4: want to go Max and Ruby.
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: I want to go with Ruby.
• 20:52
  Speaker 4: Yesterday, Ruby came to me and asked me what Sean
• 20:55
  Speaker 4: thought of the fact that our first date was because
• 20:57
  Speaker 4: she set us up out of pity.
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: Excuse me? Ruby. I feel like she's evil. This is
• 21:02
  Speaker 2: four years later, guys. They're getting married.
• 21:04
  Speaker 4: In a month and Ruby is coming back and being like, oh,
• 21:07
  Speaker 4: does he know that you guys, I set you up
• 21:09
  Speaker 4: out of pity?
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: That's crazy. crazy and also unnecessary and also I can
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: tell you right now Ruby you're a jealous little witch.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: You're a jealous little witchy witch witch. You're jealous that
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: your J with a G brother is happier than you.
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah because she was like oh he's such a lost cause.
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: Like shut up.
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: I would never say that about my You'd be like,
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: oh yeah, the pity spicy sleep is really bad.
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: For four years.
• 21:31
  Speaker 4: I admitted that I hadn't told him because I didn't
• 21:33
  Speaker 4: see the point. She then told me that I was
• 21:35
  Speaker 4: being cruel by not telling him and told me that
• 21:37
  Speaker 4: I had a week to tell Sean or she would
• 21:39
  Speaker 4: tell him herself. She framed it like she was exposing
• 21:41
  Speaker 4: a scandal. And I have no doubt that she spin
• 21:44
  Speaker 4: it to make me look like a liar who let
• 21:46
  Speaker 4: him on or something. There's a reason she's not my
• 21:48
  Speaker 4: best friend anymore.
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry. That's crazy.
• 21:51
  Speaker 4: Well she definitely is going to lie but it's insane
• 21:54
  Speaker 4: that she is the one who said yeah can you
• 21:56
  Speaker 4: just take him on a date.
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: Out of like he's just like he's such a loser
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: can you take.
• 22:00
  Speaker 4: Him out on a date she's the only one who
• 22:02
  Speaker 4: framed it like op was doing something out of pity.
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: Is like backtracking being like oh this is your fault
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: you shouldn't like should they not be dating you shouldn't
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: be like oh my god like i did this like
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: that's what you should be instead of like yeah You
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: need to tell him the truth of why you went
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: out with him and me, me, me. Why does it matter?
• 22:17
  Speaker 4: And even if OP, like if this did come out,
• 22:19
  Speaker 4: OP could just, like all OP has to say is, yeah,
• 22:22
  Speaker 4: like she told me that. She said it was, you know,
• 22:24
  Speaker 4: could you take my brother out? And I was like, okay,
• 22:27
  Speaker 4: because I didn't mind. Now I'm about to expose you.
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and then I went on the date and I
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: was like, oh, this is not at all who she described.
• 22:32
  Speaker 4: That's all you have to say. We only talk now
• 22:34
  Speaker 4: because of Sean. The problem is Sean hates being pitied. Yes,
• 22:38
  Speaker 4: he's tall and athletic.
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: But he's also extremely shy and introverted. And on top
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: of that, he missed a lot of school due to
• 22:45
  Speaker 2: an illness and an accident back to back, the latter
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: of which resulted in him losing a leg. As a result,
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: throughout high school, he had zero social interactions. His words
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: and his social skills were pretty stunted when we first
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: went out. Anyway, according to him, the pity from teachers
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: and former friends.
• 23:01
  Speaker 4: Was always the worst part. and he can't stand being
• 23:04
  Speaker 4: pitied to this day. I'm terrified to tell him about
• 23:07
  Speaker 4: the circumstances of our first date because I'm nervous it
• 23:10
  Speaker 4: would make him see me differently or damage our relationship.
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: I love this guy. He's legitimately one of the best
• 23:15
  Speaker 4: humans I've ever met. I'd hate for this all to
• 23:17
  Speaker 4: blow up in my face because I didn't tell him earlier.
• 23:20
  Speaker 4: How should I tell him?
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: We do have an update, but what do you think?
• 23:23
  Speaker 2: How would you tell him? Truthfully, I would just be like,
• 23:26
  Speaker 2: you know, when we first met, I really didn't like
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: I like really didn't think like this was gonna work
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: or whatever but I'm so glad it worked out yeah
• 23:32
  Speaker 2: like I don't know it doesn't even have to be
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: like a big thing I did this as a favor
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: for someone yeah like because you probably never said aloud
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: like oh yeah I'll go on this pity date yeah
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: it probably again went something like oh hey can you
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: take my brother out he's just like kind of a
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: loner and like no one will go out with him
• 23:52
  Speaker 2: like do you mind just like you know taking him
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: out on one time I like wouldn't take offense to it.
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: I'd be like, and look where, like, look what turned out.
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 23:59
  Speaker 2: I literally just, and then LP says, yeah, of course.
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: Goes on the date. All you have to say is, yeah,
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: your sister asked me if I could go on a
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: date with you. And so I did. And then realized
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: it was great. Like, is that bad?
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: Also, your sister is trying to like blackmail me.
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. Your sister's trying to blackmail me for some
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: odd reason. For our relationship we're in? Yeah. Huh?
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: Keep that in mind.
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And you could even say like, oh, I didn't
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: bring it up because it didn't feel at all relevant. Yeah.
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: I liked you. Update.
• 24:26
  Speaker 4: All right, so after reading through the comments, I decided
• 24:28
  Speaker 4: that I should tell Sean in a casual yet sincere way. Obviously,
• 24:31
  Speaker 4: I was going to avoid the word pity at all costs,
• 24:34
  Speaker 4: and the plan was to love him up with compliments,
• 24:37
  Speaker 4: then speak from the heart both about how awesome he
• 24:39
  Speaker 4: is and about how strange and manipulative Ruby was being.
• 24:42
  Speaker 4: Three days ago, Sean and I were sitting down for
• 24:44
  Speaker 4: a home dinner, and I decided to just get it
• 24:47
  Speaker 4: over with. I was super nervous, but I figured this
• 24:49
  Speaker 4: was as good a time as any. This is how
• 24:51
  Speaker 4: our conversation approximately went.
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: Ooh.
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: Do you go heads or tails? It's gone good or bad.
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: I'm going head because there's going to be head involved.
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: That's good. Heads is good. Tail bad. I think if
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: they really understood each other, it should be head.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: Especially.
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: Like you guys are so good and so much time
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: should be fine.
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: OP says, by the way, babe, just wanted you to
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: know something that apparently is some big secret.
• 25:16
  Speaker 4: Your sister and I used to be close and she
• 25:18
  Speaker 4: was the one who suggested I ask you out. I
• 25:20
  Speaker 4: wasn't sure that we'd work out or if I'd have
• 25:22
  Speaker 4: a good time. In fact, I was a little intimidated,
• 25:24
  Speaker 4: but I'm so glad I decided to put myself out there.
• 25:27
  Speaker 4: You're the sweetest, smartest, not to mention the most handsome
• 25:30
  Speaker 4: guy I've ever met. Can't imagine my life without you.
• 25:32
  Speaker 4: Just thinking about that sounds like a nightmare. Honestly, the
• 25:34
  Speaker 4: reasons for our first date seem so minor compared to
• 25:38
  Speaker 4: these four years of happiness, I never even thought to
• 25:40
  Speaker 4: bring it up. Then, the other day, Ruby texted me
• 25:43
  Speaker 4: out of the blue, threatening to expose the truth to
• 25:46
  Speaker 4: you if I didn't come clean first. Somehow, she's convinced
• 25:49
  Speaker 4: herself that I led you on, or that you were
• 25:52
  Speaker 4: desperate for a date at the time. I thought she
• 25:53
  Speaker 4: might have been joking, but on the off chance she's serious,
• 25:56
  Speaker 4: I couldn't bear the thought of her telling you that
• 25:58
  Speaker 4: awful story, so I figured I'd get ahead.
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: Of her and tell you the real truth.
• 26:02
  Speaker 4: I know you love her and I'd never dream of
• 26:05
  Speaker 4: telling you how to manage your relationship with your own sister,
• 26:07
  Speaker 4: but I'm going to block her and I don't want
• 26:09
  Speaker 4: to talk to her or even really see her ever again.
• 26:12
  Speaker 2: Dang.
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: Oh, wow.
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: Appetizer dinner and hopefully you get dessert.
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: He was silent for a moment before he sighed and said,
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: She already talked to me. And you're right, by the way.
• 26:21
  Speaker 4: She said that you're only with me because you feel
• 26:23
  Speaker 4: bad for me and even tried to convince me that
• 26:25
  Speaker 4: you're cheating.
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: He chuckled. Why is she trying to destroy this relationship?
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: I think she's jealous.
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, my guess is she's jealous that you took her
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: brother away from her.
• 26:35
  Speaker 2: Or, wait, what's the age difference? We don't know her age.
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: I didn't write it down. OP's 26, boyfriend's 25. There's
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: like the, she's the oldest sister, and she was like,
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: I need to get married first. I'm wondering if maybe that's...
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: No age on Ruby. Yeah, maybe that's a reason. I
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: feel like the taking her baby brother away, if that
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: could be it.
• 26:54
  Speaker 3: I just.
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: Like don't understand because the thing is yeah, I'm with fresco.
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: She's the one who set you two up So why
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: like she just did just take that credit and be
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: happy now you want to be like Oh like if
• 27:04
  Speaker 2: you break us up, then you were you are now
• 27:06
  Speaker 2: technically wrong.
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: You are wrong well you do you think it's what
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: that or that the fact that she set you two
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: up is And she's not getting her flowers or like
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: you guys aren't with her anymore.
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: Oh, like you didn't show enough gratitude. It could be.
• 27:18
  Speaker 2: I mean, give it a rest, Ruby.
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: Let's be honest. Either way, both sound... Yeah, stupid. Yeah.
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: Hold on. A big brain thought here. Why don't you
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: just be happy for your brother?
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: Or like communicate why you're so upset. What? No, she
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: can't do that. Nah, you should just, like, try to
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: ruin the marriage that you kind of, like, set up
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: in the first place. She can't be reasonable because she Ruby'd. Ruby,
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: more like stupid.
• 27:43
  Speaker 4: Boyfriend continues. Thing is, after knowing her my whole life,
• 27:46
  Speaker 4: I can read her tells like an open book. She's
• 27:48
  Speaker 4: my big sis.
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: Ah, okay. So she's older, which really makes no difference
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: at all, but okay.
• 27:54
  Speaker 4: And I love her, but at this point, I'm tired
• 27:56
  Speaker 4: of all her lies and drama. I guess you were
• 27:58
  Speaker 4: right about her. I kind of want to uninvite her.
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: Is that cool with you? I mean, yeah, Opie doesn't
• 28:01
  Speaker 2: even want to, like, talk to her. I grinned. Absolutely.
• 28:05
  Speaker 4: And hey, don't stress too much. Some people are just toxic.
• 28:08
  Speaker 4: And sometimes they happen to be family. Remember how I
• 28:10
  Speaker 4: had to cut out my dad? Remember when I cut
• 28:12
  Speaker 4: out my dad?
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: No, I don't actually. Did you mention that or what?
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: Not saying you've got to go that far with Ruby,
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: but you might want to think about it. Anyway, pass
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: the chicken. Ha ha ha ha. And the rest of
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: the dinner went like normal.
• 28:24
  Speaker 4: I'm so relieved, but also not surprised that Ruby is
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: a lying snake. I have no idea why she would
• 28:29
  Speaker 4: try to mess with my relationship with her brother, especially
• 28:32
  Speaker 4: since she's the one who set it up. But I
• 28:34
  Speaker 4: can only rationalize that she's jealous that Sean is getting
• 28:37
  Speaker 4: married while she's still single.
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: Yep, there we go. Boom. How did I know that?
• 28:42
  Speaker 4: I'm just glad that Sean didn't believe her. God, what
• 28:45
  Speaker 4: did I ever do to deserve this perfect man?
• 28:47
  Speaker 5: Aww.
• 28:48
  Speaker 4: Anyway, the next day, Sean sent Ruby an email basically
• 28:50
  Speaker 4: rescinding her invitation to her wedding. Within 15 minutes.
• 28:54
  Speaker 2: She blew up not Sean's phone, but mine.
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: Wow, you called her bluff.
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: Haha, I told him anyway.
• 29:01
  Speaker 4: She asked what I told him to make him hate
• 29:03
  Speaker 4: me because he uninvited her out of the blue.
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: I didn't respond.
• 29:06
  Speaker 4: I just showed Sean the text, to which he was
• 29:08
  Speaker 4: just so dejected and disappointed. Then when she realized I
• 29:12
  Speaker 4: wasn't biting, she started in on Sean. You got a
• 29:14
  Speaker 4: little bit left to the story, but like, yeah, it's
• 29:17
  Speaker 4: crazy that she just doesn't see it.
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: No.
• 29:19
  Speaker 2: And she still thinks like she's in the right.
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: She still thinks that like people are wronging her.
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: She, uh, she was ready to dig OP's grave. Oh yeah.
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: I'll get them. I'll trap them. The entire time she
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: was digging her, her own grave. Yeah.
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: No, literally Fred Skull says it. She bullied herself. She's like, ow, Yeah,
• 29:36
  Speaker 2: it's like, oh, if I make them confess under these
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: false pretenses, everything will go according to plan, and then
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: I'll get married to my brother.
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: She's like, here, take the shovel. Please take the shovel.
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: Please take it out of my hands.
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like, girl, you gotta know when to lose the battle.
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: Bonk. Bonk.
• 29:55
  Speaker 4: She called them a traitor and tried to guilt him
• 29:57
  Speaker 4: by saying that she deserved to be there because she's family.
• 30:00
  Speaker 2: She continued.
• 30:04
  Speaker 4: Sean to call off the wedding because clearly I'm getting
• 30:06
  Speaker 4: between them in order to isolate Sean from his family.
• 30:09
  Speaker 4: He was almost ready to give her a second chance
• 30:12
  Speaker 4: too until she started bad mouthing me and he finally
• 30:16
  Speaker 4: started to realize how terrible of a person.
• 30:18
  Speaker 2: His dear sister is. Seeing the light leave his face
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: I grew to honestly hate Ruby. I mean she I
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: think she hates you too. She don't it's mutual.
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 30:28
  Speaker 4: Sean decided to cut her out entirely, and now his
• 30:30
  Speaker 4: other family are bugging him about it. His mom is
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: threatening to not show up, unless he re-invites Ruby, but
• 30:36
  Speaker 4: she won't do it. Sean is her golden boy, her
• 30:39
  Speaker 4: only son in the apple of her eye. She loves
• 30:41
  Speaker 4: her other kids as well, but.
• 30:43
  Speaker 2: None in the same way as Sean. He looks like
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: a clone of his late father, and I don't think
• 30:47
  Speaker 2: she can help it. She'd never forgive herself if she
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: missed his wedding. Dang.
• 30:52
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so he's like, yeah, we're gonna call that bluff.
• 30:54
  Speaker 4: But that's the end of that story, folks.
• 30:57
  Speaker 2: Just enjoy your wedding, Opie. Don't worry about the noise.
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: I guess you can call Ruby pretty dull.
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: Pretty frickin' dull. Ooh, Ruby, more like stupid.
• 31:06
  Speaker 3: Hey, this is Riley, the new Californian here. We're going
• 31:09
  Speaker 3: to get back to these stories, but here's three minutes
• 31:11
  Speaker 3: of ads from our sponsors.
• 31:13
  Speaker 2: My long distance boyfriend asked for a break, then slept
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: with his roommate. We were on a break. My boyfriend
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: and I, both 20, met freshman year of college and
• 31:24
  Speaker 2: have been dating for two years now. We've always been
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: an insanely close BFF type couple and never seemed to
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: have a single problem. He's a computer scientist and has
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: spent his summers interning in California while I'm in New York.
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: So we're on opposite coasts. It's me and Joe. Oh
• 31:40
  Speaker 2: my God. Ta-da. Shut up. It's going to be a thing, guys.
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: And then in like a million years, we'll like see this.
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: In a million years? All right, whatever.
• 31:51
  Speaker 4: In a million years, they're going to find evidence.
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: In two months. He's going to come over.
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: Just show up. I just had like a sense that
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: I should be here. I am going to piss myself,
• 32:01
  Speaker 2: throw up, spontaneously combust, and then roll around on the
• 32:04
  Speaker 2: floor and be like, oh my God. And he's going
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: to be like, that was so hot. No one's ever
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: reacted to this. oh stop it feels like savannah's threatening
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: that she has a one wish willow it's right here
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: there's a whole movie about why it's not a good
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: thing to use well no but i wouldn't say i
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: want her i wanted to be obsessed with me and
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: what would you say he just he just knows you
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: i would say i wish we could date but like
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: he what he's not happy he doesn't.
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: Know you okay back to the story I'd be like.
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: Can I meet him? Now he has a choice. I
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: don't want him to be forced. He has a choice.
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: The first summer wasn't a big deal, but this past
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: summer I started having issues with his communication. He rarely
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: had time to call or Skype, and he's always been
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: a terrible texter. I figured it was something we'd fix
• 32:46
  Speaker 2: once we were back on campus. Because he did so
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: well at his internship, he was offered a year-long position
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: in California, which he accepted right away. He admitted that
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: he didn't take our relationship into consideration because he didn't
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: want it affecting his decision.
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: OP is 20 female, partner 20 male.
• 33:01
  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, I would think so, but thank you for clarifying.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: Always.
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: I understood that, even though it hurt. We've seen each
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: other twice since then, once at the beginning of August,
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: and once when I flew out there about a month ago.
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: The agreement was that he would call or Skype me
• 33:15
  Speaker 2: once a week. And for the most part, he stuck
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: to it. Surprisingly, things seem to be going well considering
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: the distance. By the way, this comes from Cake and Stuff.
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: And if you want to submit your own stories, go
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: to the r slash okay story time subreddit as a
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: piece has. Two weeks ago, the communication suddenly started dropping
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: off again. It reminded me of the summer and I
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: started getting worried. After days of trying to get him
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: to call or Skype me, he told me he couldn't
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: because he had sat down to watch V for Vendetta-
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: Shut up. No, I'm sorry.
• 33:43
  Speaker 4: I can't call or Skype you for the next four
• 33:45
  Speaker 4: days because I am watching the movie Veep for Vendetta
• 33:48
  Speaker 4: with Natalie Portman.
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: Where she shapes her head.
• 33:51
  Speaker 2: I did not like that movie. Never seen it.
• 33:53
  Speaker 3: You probably wouldn't like it.
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: Cinematography is great.
• 33:55
  Speaker 2: Cinematography is great. It's basically just like Stockholm Syndrome. I
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: like that. Okay. I completely blew up. We talked about
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: communication and he explained that he doesn't like phone calls
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: or Skype because he gets distracted and starts doing other
• 34:07
  Speaker 2: things while we're talking.
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: I mean, what a stupid, stupid excuse.
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: Stupid excuse. I do do that. And so I need
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: to like walk around if I'm talking to someone.
• 34:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: Have you seen where people it's like a meme where
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: people are like on the phone, but they're like, walk around,
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: climb a tree.
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I have to.
• 34:25
  Speaker 4: I like I won't be focused on the call. That's
• 34:27
  Speaker 4: why I usually call people when I'm on walks. Or
• 34:29
  Speaker 4: when she's in the car.
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: Or when I'm in the car. She likes to do
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: that a lot. I do.
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: This guy's making an excuse like, I just don't want
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: to talk to you.
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: Literally just say that instead of making the excuse like,
• 34:38
  Speaker 2: I just, I'm not going to be able to concentrate
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: when I'm on the phone because I have to do things.
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: You don't understand. He also said he struggles to respond
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: properly to text and thought Facebook messages might work better.
• 34:48
  Speaker 4: That, okay, well that makes no sense.
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: And now that is a huge red flag. He's like,
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: he is now actively cheating. Text messages don't really work
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: for me, but like, what if we used telegrams?
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: Like, At this point, OP, just do B for breakup.
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 35:04
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 35:05
  Speaker 2: Press B for breakup. During that conversation, he revealed that
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: he was actually struggling with being apart from me. Oh,
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: so the solution is to just shut down every chance
• 35:16
  Speaker 2: to talk to her. You got it. He's always had
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: a girlfriend and hasn't spent much time single. When he
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: was home, we spent almost every night together. And when
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: he wasn't with me, he usually had a roommate. Now
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: he lives with six other people, but has his own
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: room and sleeping alone every night has been affecting him.
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: Get a stuffed animal. He told me he had been
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: weighing his need to have someone to sleep next to
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: against his desire to be with me. Later, he clarified
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: that he didn't actually want anyone else. He said he
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: didn't want some crappy half Jane pretending to be my Jane,
• 35:46
  Speaker 2: that the loneliness was painful. I suggested recording the sound
• 35:49
  Speaker 2: of myself sleeping for him to listen to, but he
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: rejected it, calling it a dirty trick. That's actually insane.
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: What if you just listen? I'm just going to record
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: myself sleeping and then you can just play that while
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: you're sleeping. It's like, I'm right there. Wait, what? That's
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: what she said. That was her solution. Why was his,
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: why was his response? That's a dirty trick.
• 36:09
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: And I also, I guess because he would. Oh, maybe
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: she's like, well, if you record yourself sleeping, it's like
• 36:16
  Speaker 2: we're together.
• 36:17
  Speaker 4: And he's thinking, if I record myself sleeping, she'll realize
• 36:20
  Speaker 4: I'm with another woman.
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: No, no, not him recording it. No, she would send like,
• 36:25
  Speaker 2: I don't know, a video or recording of her sleeping.
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: And I think he's saying it's a dirty trick because
• 36:30
  Speaker 2: he's going to wake up and she's not going to
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: be there. And then he's going to be like, oh.
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: I thought she was also asking for him to send it.
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: I have no idea what he's saying or why you
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: did that. He's an idiot who doesn't know how to speak, apparently.
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: So let's keep going. So over that weekend, I told
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: him to think about whether he still wanted to be
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: with me or if he wanted to break up because
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: I wasn't going to make that decision for him. Girl,
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: never give. No. If you want it, do it.
• 36:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 36:53
  Speaker 2: If you want to break up, break up. I tried
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: to do that like five times. Yeah. And it was
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: like the word it was pulling teeth. And I was like,
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: you know what? Actually, why am I not just doing it? Yeah,
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: I hate the thing of like, oh, well, if they
• 37:04
  Speaker 2: want it so bad, then they've got to do it.
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: It's like, no, who cares? Don't let them have that
• 37:08
  Speaker 2: power of you.
• 37:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 37:09
  Speaker 2: You take the power back. He thought about it overnight
• 37:12
  Speaker 2: and came back saying he wanted to be with me.
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: When I asked why he chose that, he said he
• 37:16
  Speaker 2: didn't have a reason and just went with his gut feeling.
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: That didn't really reassure me. Then he announced that he
• 37:22
  Speaker 2: wanted to take a break for a week so he
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: could realize all the things he takes for granted and
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: better appreciate me.
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: Oh my god.
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: What the BS excuse? It's like, well, I think I'm
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: going to come back stronger from not talking to you.
• 37:35
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I actually realized that the absence makes the heart
• 37:38
  Speaker 4: grow fonder and I'm so fond of you now.
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: I asked him directly if he had met someone else.
• 37:43
  Speaker 2: He denied it and said that wasn't what this was about. What? No,
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: I just think I would appreciate it if we didn't
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: talk for a week and I would- Appreciate all the
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: things that I'm missing out on.
• 37:55
  Speaker 4: I just feel like I'd love you more if you
• 37:57
  Speaker 4: were in my life less.
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: I told him that if he did meet someone, the
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: decent thing would be to break up with me first.
• 38:04
  Speaker 2: And he agreed. So we started our break. I know
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: that right after we hung up, he and his housemates
• 38:09
  Speaker 2: were throwing a huge party and I couldn't help wondering
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: if the timing meant something. Yes. Girl, he has this
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: all calculated. Yes. My friends and sisters were convinced that
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: this was an excuse for him to keep me around
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: while looking for someone else.
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: They cracked the code.
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 38:23
  Speaker 2: Part of me wondered if I had been too demanding
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: with wanting him to communicate more. OP!
• 38:28
  Speaker 4: Part of me wondered if it was crazy for me
• 38:30
  Speaker 4: to expect any level of communication in my relationship.
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: OP, it's going over your head.
• 38:34
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 38:35
  Speaker 2: But if that was the issue, I didn't understand why
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: he couldn't have just told me. We're young and maybe
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: I should let him go, but I felt like if
• 38:42
  Speaker 2: there was something worth saving, I wanted to try. Update
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: two days later.
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: Ain't nothing worth saving if it doesn't want to save itself.
• 38:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, this is not going to work. He's very
• 38:54
  Speaker 2: much checked out. And literally the fact that he's like,
• 38:57
  Speaker 2: I just get really sad and I want to appreciate
• 38:59
  Speaker 2: everything that you do for me. So let's not talk
• 39:02
  Speaker 2: for a week. All right, I'm going to go drink
• 39:03
  Speaker 2: myself to oblivion and talk to some girls. Bye. Yeah, no.
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: He was like, that was easy.
• 39:08
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: That's all he had to do.
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: Let's make it a breakup. Yeah.
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: He literally just said, this will be really easy. You know,
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: I'll let you take all the accountability. Like, let you
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: do this.
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: Okay, cool.
• 39:18
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: Two days later, he just messaged me over Facebook telling
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: me he misses me like crazy. And then he already
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: bought plane tickets to come surprise me this weekend.
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: I guess he got it out of the system.
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah. He wanted to tell me beforehand in case I
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: had made plans. I have no idea how to feel.
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: Of course, I'm happy that he wants to see me,
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: but it feels surreal. Yeah, he wants to see you
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: because he wants to get some.
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: Or he struck out. Either or.
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: I think he's happy because he got some, and now
• 39:46
  Speaker 2: he wants some more.
• 39:47
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: I like, Silver King says, absence means I hate you.
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: Absence means we're not together. Over the past few days,
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: I had seriously considered ending things because I didn't know
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: if he was pursuing other women or had already met someone.
• 40:00
  Speaker 2: I thought if he came back, it would take months
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: if it happened at all. But only two days later,
• 40:05
  Speaker 2: I don't know if this is a good sign or
• 40:07
  Speaker 2: if we should still take the break because the problems
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: he had before haven't magically disappeared. Update four days later. Oh,
• 40:15
  Speaker 2: can we make this update four days later? I broke up, please.
• 40:17
  Speaker 1: Just again, B for breakup.
• 40:19
  Speaker 2: B for breakup.
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: Up.
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: Why are we still here? Yeah. He cheated on you. Probably.
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: And if he didn't cheat on you, he still emotionally
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: is just... He still sucks. Not respecting you.
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, he definitely is just... He is completely disregarding you.
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: And you already knew that because he literally told you, yeah,
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: I didn't take this into consideration when I started this job. Yeah,
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: he's like, I don't know. I just feel like we
• 40:42
  Speaker 2: shouldn't talk to each other. Four days later, he flew
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: in yesterday morning. After we sat around for about an hour,
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: I could tell he was being hesitant with me. I
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: asked him if there was a girl involved, and he
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: said yes. Uh-huh.
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: Didn't have to fly all the way here for this. Yeah.
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: Pre or post spicy sleep?
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: I asked him to tell me everything. According to him,
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: after our argument last Thursday, he got wasted and started
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: flirting with his female roommate.
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: And he's gonna blame it on OP.
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: He's gonna go, well, we were on a break though.
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: You pushed me to drink. You pushed me to do this.
• 41:15
  Speaker 4: You have to be so clear on what your boundaries
• 41:17
  Speaker 4: are in a break.
• 41:18
  Speaker 2: He lives with six other people and she is the
• 41:20
  Speaker 2: only straight female in the house. He claimed that when
• 41:23
  Speaker 2: he asked for a break on Sunday, it was not
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: about her. But I told him that she was probably
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: in the back of his mind when he made that decision.
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: He agreed. On Monday, they got wasted and had spicy sleep.
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: The next morning, he felt terrible. And by Tuesday afternoon,
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: he had bought a ticket to come see me.
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: He thought it was going to fix it.
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: He's like, ah, yay. Oh, no, I did this horrible thing.
• 41:46
  Speaker 2: You know what's going to make up for it? If
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: I tell her in person that I cheated on her. Yay.
• 41:51
  Speaker 3: Nailed it.
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: She'll love that. Yeah, I know. I know we can
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: watch V for Vendetta.
• 41:54
  Speaker 1: OP's going to have a vendetta soon.
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: Before leaving, he talked to his roommate and told her
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: it could never happen again. We can never be together
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: because my girlfriend who I hate and I don't talk
• 42:04
  Speaker 2: to will be upset. I was devastated. I told him
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: he needed to leave and stay with a friend. He
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: started crying while explaining everything. And when I said we
• 42:13
  Speaker 2: probably needed to break up, he broke down apologizing. What?
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: We're already like, we're already there.
• 42:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 42:18
  Speaker 4: Where was the emotion like throughout every other aspect of
• 42:21
  Speaker 4: your relationship?
• 42:22
  Speaker 2: Where was this emotion? I don't think he's ever been this,
• 42:25
  Speaker 2: you know. The only reason he visited you was to
• 42:29
  Speaker 2: have this conversation in person. Yeah. Yet when you were
• 42:31
  Speaker 2: on good terms, he never wanted to come and see you. Yeah,
• 42:34
  Speaker 2: that's the crazy thing. Like he needed this. No, that's
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: happened with my ex. Every time there was like a
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: bad thing would happen and it's like, oh, let me
• 42:42
  Speaker 2: make it up. And I'm like, where's this coming from?
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: What?
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: Like, it was just, it's so stupid. It's like the
• 42:47
  Speaker 2: bringing flowers to apologize, not just because I love you.
• 42:50
  Speaker 2: It's like when we were having a good time, you
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: could have done something in that. No. No, you didn't
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: want to. You thought, ah, she'll stick around.
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: All of his emotion was into V for Vendetta.
• 43:00
  Speaker 2: It's true.
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: It's true.
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: He was crying in that movie. I called my mom
• 43:02
  Speaker 2: and eventually calmed down enough to talk. We spent most
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: of the day discussing everything. And in the end, I
• 43:07
  Speaker 2: decided we should spend the weekend together because it might
• 43:10
  Speaker 2: be the last time we had. My plan was still
• 43:13
  Speaker 2: to break up with him when he left.
• 43:14
  Speaker 3: Was?
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: If it had been a random person, maybe things would
• 43:17
  Speaker 2: have been different, but she is his roommate and he
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: has to live with her until August. I couldn't ignore that.
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: Nah, there's no shot. Even if it was a random person,
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: there's no shot.
• 43:26
  Speaker 2: Even if it was a random person, that'd be worse.
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: Like it's a band-aid where the band-aids are like pretty
• 43:29
  Speaker 1: much off yeah because it's you guys were already on
• 43:31
  Speaker 1: a break.
• 43:32
  Speaker 2: So close just just flick it there were also too
• 43:35
  Speaker 2: many broken promises he had promised i didn't need to
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: worry about him living with girls because they were too
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: unattractive for him wow that is oh my god you
• 43:44
  Speaker 2: slept with one of them that's red flag central right
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: there i wouldn't date them because they're ugly yay if
• 43:51
  Speaker 2: they were hot that'd be a different story really.
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: I would never live with hot people.
• 43:55
  Speaker 2: Oh my God. They're ugly. And he had promised the
• 43:58
  Speaker 2: break wasn't about seeing other people. He says it was
• 44:01
  Speaker 2: the worst mistake he ever made and that it meant nothing.
• 44:04
  Speaker 2: That's even worse. Yeah, that's how I'd be looking at him.
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: He says he was lonely and depressed. He also told
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: me he had started saving for a wedding ring because
• 44:11
  Speaker 2: he saw me as someone he wanted to marry someday.
• 44:15
  Speaker 2: This guy, give me a break. You weren't saving for
• 44:18
  Speaker 2: a ring. You were saving vacation with another girl.
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: Well, he did give OP a break too.
• 44:23
  Speaker 2: Let's break up.
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: Just add one more word to it.
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: Let's just break up. Give me a break up. It
• 44:27
  Speaker 2: was nice to hear, but it made everything even more confusing. No,
• 44:30
  Speaker 2: it didn't. Right now, it felt like he would say
• 44:33
  Speaker 2: anything to keep me. Maybe we'll get back together when
• 44:35
  Speaker 2: he returns to New York in a year. Maybe we won't.
• 44:37
  Speaker 2: But once he goes back to California, I don't know
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: if I can trust him anymore. You don't know? You
• 44:41
  Speaker 2: don't know? What do you mean you don't know? What
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: did you not know?
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: Okay, now I'm looking at you like this.
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, now I'm looking at you. What do you not know?
• 44:46
  Speaker 2: We're young. He was my first serious relationship and he
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: needs to experience life outside of this relationship too. I
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: think we are both too young to stay trapped in
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: this situation. Update three, three days later. I mean like
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: wrong equation, but right answer, I think.
• 44:59
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: I like, you know, I like the fact that it's like, oh,
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: like I'm trying to think of logically. Yeah, we are young.
• 45:04
  Speaker 2: We should experience more. But he cheated on you. So. So, yes,
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: you're correct. But you're not really seeing it. Yes. But
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: you're also being very naive. Silly, silly, silly. For some reason.
• 45:17
  Speaker 2: Three days later.
• 45:17
  Speaker 3: Oh, boy.
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: Hey, it's Keelan, your residential nerd. We're going to get
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: back to the stories. But here's three minutes of ads
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: from our sponsors.
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: My now ex flew in from California and told me
• 45:28
  Speaker 2: he slept with his female roommate. We spent the weekend
• 45:30
  Speaker 2: trying to work through it, and when he left early
• 45:32
  Speaker 2: yesterday morning, I still felt confused and hurt. I needed
• 45:34
  Speaker 2: space to think clearly. After three days, I started wondering
• 45:37
  Speaker 2: if maybe he deserved another chance, if he could prove himself,
• 45:40
  Speaker 2: but something still didn't feel right. Parts of his story
• 45:42
  Speaker 2: weren't adding up. So I messaged his roommate. I don't
• 45:45
  Speaker 2: blame her for what happened because I believe cheating falls
• 45:47
  Speaker 2: on the person in the relationship, which was my ex.
• 45:50
  Speaker 2: I explained everything to her, including that he told me
• 45:52
  Speaker 2: the break wasn't about another woman and that I would
• 45:55
  Speaker 2: never have agreed to it if I knew he was
• 45:57
  Speaker 2: planning to see someone else. I also asked what their
• 45:59
  Speaker 2: relationship had actually been like. She was honest with me.
• 46:02
  Speaker 2: She said that for a few weeks, they had been
• 46:04
  Speaker 2: drinking buddies and that there had been tension between them.
• 46:08
  Speaker 2: They had gotten closer, sitting too close and having moments
• 46:11
  Speaker 2: that crossed boundaries. The day we started fighting, he became
• 46:13
  Speaker 2: more forward with her. What a sleaze. Yeah. She stopped
• 46:17
  Speaker 2: him because she knew he was still with me and
• 46:19
  Speaker 2: didn't want to be a rebound. However, she admitted she
• 46:22
  Speaker 2: made her intentions clear afterward. On Sunday, right after he
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: initiated the break with me, he texted her. That night
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: they hooked up and they had spicy sleep both Monday
• 46:30
  Speaker 2: and Tuesday nights. That was enough for me. Not only
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: had he slept with her, but he had hidden how
• 46:35
  Speaker 2: much had already been happening before the break. Cheater.
• 46:39
  Speaker 4: And also, like, I think props to OP for really
• 46:42
  Speaker 4: putting the blame seemingly solely on her boyfriend rather than
• 46:46
  Speaker 4: this girl. While I think that definitely some of the
• 46:49
  Speaker 4: blame is on this girl because she knew about you.
• 46:51
  Speaker 4: I like how OP approached this because it got the
• 46:54
  Speaker 4: truth out very quickly because OP wasn't attacking her.
• 46:56
  Speaker 2: Yes, exactly. Not being like, hey, you little witch. You
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: little sleut. Even though I think that this girl is
• 47:02
  Speaker 2: at fault. I mean, teachers are horrible. Yeah, it doesn't occur.
• 47:05
  Speaker 2: It's like, uh, can I, what is it? Like, have
• 47:08
  Speaker 2: your cake and eat it too? Yeah. That is it.
• 47:11
  Speaker 2: I had specifically told him that if another woman was involved,
• 47:14
  Speaker 2: the right thing to do was end our relationship. Instead,
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: he chose to keep me while pursuing someone else. There's
• 47:20
  Speaker 2: a little bit left here. What are we doing? I mean,
• 47:23
  Speaker 2: obviously we're broken up, but like.
• 47:24
  Speaker 1: We get back together, obviously.
• 47:26
  Speaker 4: He's like, well, in three years, we'll be fine. No,
• 47:28
  Speaker 4: we break up and we leave him behind and we
• 47:30
  Speaker 4: move on to our.
• 47:31
  Speaker 2: Next relationship, OP.
• 47:33
  Speaker 1: Give yourself some time. Block him.
• 47:34
  Speaker 2: Our next relationship with ourself. And that's the truth. The
• 47:39
  Speaker 2: whole thing is messy. He, from the beginning, wasn't choosing you, so. No. Bye-bye.
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: The only positive thing out of this, OP, is that
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: you're still young.
• 47:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I thanked her for being honest and sent him
• 47:49
  Speaker 2: an email with a picture of all his belongings packed
• 47:52
  Speaker 2: in a garbage bag. I told him I knew everything,
• 47:54
  Speaker 2: that we were done, and that I didn't want him
• 47:56
  Speaker 2: contacting me anymore. Of course, he kept calling. Oh, weird.
• 48:00
  Speaker 2: How he, like, couldn't call when you were together. I
• 48:02
  Speaker 2: thought he didn't like to call.
• 48:04
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 48:04
  Speaker 2: I didn't. I thought he was busy. He's busy watching
• 48:07
  Speaker 2: his show. Wait, wait. Be calling me? You're the boyfriend.
• 48:10
  Speaker 5: I'm OP.
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: Hello? Hey, so.
• 48:13
  Speaker 4: No, sorry.
• 48:13
  Speaker 2: I can't talk.
• 48:14
  Speaker 4: I'm watching V for Vendetta. And that's what you do.
• 48:16
  Speaker 4: That's what you do. You just reverse it right back
• 48:19
  Speaker 4: on him.
• 48:19
  Speaker 2: When I finally answered, he was crying and begging me
• 48:23
  Speaker 2: not to leave. He said he didn't tell me everything
• 48:25
  Speaker 2: because he thought I wouldn't forgive him. You were right.
• 48:28
  Speaker 2: Look at you, you genius. You little smart boy.
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: You get a gold star for that one, champ.
• 48:33
  Speaker 2: Like, Do I have to like hold your hand while
• 48:37
  Speaker 2: you do anything in life?
• 48:38
  Speaker 1: You have to hold his hand while you're breaking up
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: with him.
• 48:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, this is like giving like toddler. Why are you
• 48:43
  Speaker 2: like so immature? I didn't want to tell you because
• 48:46
  Speaker 2: I knew. I knew you'd break up with me because
• 48:48
  Speaker 2: I cheated on you. If I did that, I would
• 48:50
  Speaker 2: hope you would break up with me too. Please. He
• 48:52
  Speaker 2: said he didn't want the other girl and only wanted me.
• 48:55
  Speaker 2: I told him that if he really cared about me,
• 48:57
  Speaker 2: he would understand that I deserved better than how he
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: had treated me. He left another voicemail saying he didn't
• 49:03
  Speaker 2: want to be alone and asking if it wasn't enough
• 49:06
  Speaker 2: that he had told me 90% of what happened. Give
• 49:10
  Speaker 2: me a breakup! How is it not enough? How is
• 49:14
  Speaker 2: it not enough that I told you most? I told
• 49:17
  Speaker 2: you 90% of what happened, I told you most of it.
• 49:20
  Speaker 2: This is on you. If you don't want to forgive me,
• 49:22
  Speaker 2: then that's on you now. 90% is an A minus.
• 49:26
  Speaker 2: That's still passing. That's so far from passing. That's so good.
• 49:31
  Speaker 2: That's almost it. What is he? He has to be
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: like drinking something that's making him this stupid. Stupid juice. Yeah,
• 49:39
  Speaker 2: he's drinking stupid juice. Stupid juice. So yeah, everyone on
• 49:43
  Speaker 2: this website was right about him from the beginning. But
• 49:45
  Speaker 2: you got there. It sucks that you had to like
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: find out this way and you had to go through
• 49:50
  Speaker 2: all these different steps. Like you couldn't just be a
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: man and like actually be like, hey, babe, this is
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: what happened. All this stuff. I mean, either way, he's
• 49:57
  Speaker 2: a horrible guy.
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 49:58
  Speaker 2: Whether he admits it or not or whatever. Like it's
• 50:00
  Speaker 2: just no matter how you cut it. He's a bad guy.
• 50:03
  Speaker 2: He's still an idiot. So OP, thank God you're out
• 50:06
  Speaker 2: of that. Don't give him any more chances. Block him.
• 50:09
  Speaker 2: Don't like he's he's been done. So you need to
• 50:13
  Speaker 2: be done as well. Be done with him. That's the
• 50:15
  Speaker 2: end of that story. And now we have some comments.
• 50:18
  Speaker 2: And so these comments are from the video. My stepmom
• 50:22
  Speaker 2: shamed my husband for being J with a G.
• 50:25
  Speaker 5: No.
• 50:26
  Speaker 2: And this story was posted June 20th, 2025. And this
• 50:30
  Speaker 2: is the TLDR for story one. OP is a J
• 50:33
  Speaker 2: with a G man who just married his husband. His
• 50:36
  Speaker 2: stepmom does not like that OP is like that. At
• 50:39
  Speaker 2: a family party, OP told everyone he was getting married.
• 50:42
  Speaker 2: His stepmom got mad and said mean things using Bible verses.
• 50:46
  Speaker 2: She said, saying marriage is a sin. OP got so
• 50:50
  Speaker 2: upset he threw his drink on her. Then things got
• 50:53
  Speaker 2: even messier between OP and his stepmom all the way
• 50:56
  Speaker 2: up to the wedding day and even after. If you're
• 51:00
  Speaker 2: curious to know the full story, you can go watch
• 51:02
  Speaker 2: the full video. You sure can.
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: And we have some comments here from Seiko Chan 677 saying,
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: tell the stepmom that Jesus was raised by two dads
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: and turned out fine.
• 51:15
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah.
• 51:15
  Speaker 2: Turn that Bible on them.
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 51:17
  Speaker 2: And that's the truth. And that is true.
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: Another comment here from Huertas Garden saying, former Catholic here,
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: religious people love to forget that only God is allowed
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: to judge and that God tells people. to treat others
• 51:28
  Speaker 1: well and basically let him deal with the sinners. Religious
• 51:30
  Speaker 1: people love to judge on his behalf. This is one
• 51:33
  Speaker 1: of the main reasons I left the religion at 11.
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: Even my child brain knew it was effed up.
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, people, there's a lot of hypocrisy. A
• 51:40
  Speaker 2: lot of hypocrisy. A lot of hypocrisy.
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 51:43
  Speaker 2: Wait, no, they never practice what they preach.
• 51:44
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 51:45
  Speaker 2: They just preach, but they never practice. They just preach
• 51:49
  Speaker 2: and then hopefully something will work out. Talking about We have.
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: Another comment here from Nix Nefe saying, Honestly, I live
• 51:57
  Speaker 1: in a conservative state, and I take a lot more
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: teasing than some people would, as long as people actually
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: support and accept me. You put up with a lot
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: more and have a lot thicker skin when you grow
• 52:05
  Speaker 1: up around certain people.
• 52:07
  Speaker 2: You don't have to take it.
• 52:08
  Speaker 1: But that is the end of those comments.
• 52:10
  Speaker 2: So if you love us, make sure to subscribe. We
• 52:13
  Speaker 2: love you. And see you tomorrow.