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Transcript

Tops & Bottom Tens - Joe M Bottoms the New Series · A Hamster With a Blunt Penknife - a Doctor Who Commentary podcast

• 0:24
  Coming in, let's go across to the they're very hotly contested
• 0:28
  bottom 10 new series list now. This was really fucking hard.
• 0:37
  Worst New Series 10. About half of the market put on
• 0:42
  my bottom 10 list. Well, I'll, I'll host you back
• 0:46
  then we'll do that and then I'll just go.
• 0:48
  I've got a. Big mind.
• 0:49
  At some point, yeah, but. Then what will happen is if
• 0:51
  especially, yeah, don't let me do it, because what will happen
• 0:53
  is you'll, you'll say, oh, and I hated this one.
• 0:55
  And I'll say, oh, really? I thought it was all.
• 0:58
  There won't be any. There'll be no friction
• 1:00
  whatsoever. So yeah, you need someone with a
• 1:02
  bit of sort of grit, which is sadly lacking, I think honestly.
• 1:09
  And it was really hard as well not to just fully shit all over.
• 1:14
  Even as a fan of the most recent stuff, you know that there are
• 1:19
  personal reasons why I enjoyed RTD Two.
• 1:23
  There are certain episodes that I enjoyed because I've watched
• 1:27
  them with my son, with my family.
• 1:30
  However, I cannot it doesn't get any worse than Wish World and
• 1:35
  the Reality War. It just was such a shit show,
• 1:43
  even at the end when, when Billy Piper, this is far from the most
• 1:49
  egregious thing that it does, but Billy Piper turned up at the
• 1:56
  end. Even my 9 year old went what the
• 1:58
  fuck? And I think if you've if if
• 2:01
  that's what the kids are saying and the kids who aren't watching
• 2:04
  because they're all they're all kids of fans who are watching
• 2:06
  now, like then that's it's too far, man.
• 2:10
  It's too, it's too much. And I think, you know, it's so
• 2:15
  obviously wasn't the plan. And I didn't hate the area in
• 2:20
  the way that some did. No names mentioned.
• 2:24
  None of us hope. But the you know, I enjoyed it
• 2:30
  well enough, but I just and like I I enjoyed elements of it.
• 2:36
  Archie Punjabi and Danita Dobson, both excellent as the
• 2:38
  rally. Really enjoyed both of those.
• 2:40
  Lots of great ideas, lots of stuff that if it wasn't for
• 2:46
  trying to make it this big Avengers thing could have been
• 2:49
  really, really fun and really, really interesting and a really
• 2:52
  potentially interesting dissection of the sort of
• 2:56
  manosphere alt right thing that Conrad had going on.
• 3:01
  But it just is shit. Maybe too many ideas, all right,
• 3:06
  maybe too many characters. There's that scene in episode 2
• 3:10
  where the whole of UNIT are there when the Ronnie
• 3:13
  materialises and there's so many characters there that they can
• 3:16
  only have a line each. And that's that's a like a 5
• 3:20
  minute scene and they get one line each and otherwise they'll
• 3:22
  just stand there waiting. To give their line.
• 3:25
  There's just, there's just no need for it.
• 3:27
  And it like, I mean, I'm not a huge fan of the big finale thing
• 3:32
  either. Like I think there's a couple
• 3:34
  where it works. Like I really like part of the
• 3:36
  ways and Pandorica opens in Big Bang.
• 3:41
  I I think, you know, there, there are ones where it really
• 3:44
  works and where the Ark's built to the point where that's
• 3:47
  necessary. But I'm very much not of the
• 3:50
  opinion that it needs to happen every time.
• 3:52
  But if you're gonna, you have to make it coherent and like the
• 3:56
  fact that they were filming this while, you know, the first
• 4:00
  series hadn't even been out yet. And I've, I know that bits of it
• 4:02
  will be shot. I don't know the timeline of
• 4:04
  everything. I think, I mean, obviously every
• 4:07
  episode of the new series is rewritten to death, right?
• 4:10
  But I think this was probably the most rewritten episode.
• 4:13
  Of the new series. And you can see the stitches.
• 4:17
  Yeah, yeah, you really can't. It feels like the post its all
• 4:19
  fell off the wall and someone just hastily put them back on.
• 4:23
  Belinda wasn't supposed to be in this one.
• 4:25
  Or just shove her in a box in. Yeah, I mean it.
• 4:28
  It works. That's the thing, right In in
• 4:31
  classic telly, the Doctor can go on holiday for two weeks.
• 4:34
  They just film a couple of bits and nobody really notices.
• 4:36
  You can't shaking you. So haven't they?
• 4:38
  You know, you can't. You can't get away with that
• 4:40
  shit anymore. Well, they tried and with by
• 4:43
  putting Belinda in a box. And like I say, I like Belinda
• 4:45
  well enough as a character. She's probably not my favorite,
• 4:47
  but I I enjoyed the performance. I thought she did.
• 4:51
  She did well with not. Enough.
• 4:52
  A lot. Does she?
• 4:53
  No, but she did well with not an awful lot of material.
• 4:56
  And I think, you know, there are there are challenges that were
• 5:00
  obviously faced. I just think they're teased so
• 5:03
  much with sort of Susan coming back.
• 5:05
  And I mean, God knows why you needed Caroline Ford back in any
• 5:08
  capacity. Bless her.
• 5:09
  Like, I think she wasn't the great actor in the 60s.
• 5:15
  And the idea, like, I feel like that feels like the sort of
• 5:19
  thing that will have happened after they brought Ian back at
• 5:22
  the end of Power of the Doctor. And then I've gone.
• 5:25
  I'll tell you what we could. We could get Susan Cheese.
• 5:27
  Yeah, we can top. That's the earliest character to
• 5:30
  come back, you reckon? Well, I'm going to top chippers.
• 5:33
  Yeah, exactly. I always imagine that was the
• 5:35
  rationale, but. It must have been right because
• 5:37
  she's not like, it's a lovely idea.
• 5:40
  The idea of having a cameo is is it's nice.
• 5:43
  It would be nice for her. Come on, she was ghastly in.
• 5:47
  Go back grandfather, go back like.
• 5:50
  What's happening? Yeah, I just, there's just,
• 5:55
  there's just no call for it. There's there's almost sort of
• 5:59
  too much to get into why it's so shit.
• 6:02
  Like, yeah, remember, we're only in your 10s.
• 6:05
  That's the thing, right? So I sort of just feel like,
• 6:07
  yeah, I feel like I'm just going to have to.
• 6:09
  It is clearly the shit. It's one everybody agrees with
• 6:11
  that let's move on, OK? No arguments from me.
• 6:16
  Oh, I did a fun in the cinema. It was just.
• 6:18
  The next day when I started thinking through the plot.
• 6:21
  And I was going, oh, what plot? I don't think there was 1.
• 6:25
  You know, it was nice to be in the pictures with with Jodie
• 6:28
  coming back and you know, that was the best bit.
• 6:30
  Yeah, oh, yes, even she's going. Oh, you're so gorgeous.
• 6:34
  Oh for fuck's sake, we know he's gorgeous, all right?
• 6:37
  Yeah, I just, I went with the like with the local Doctor Who
• 6:40
  lot and we went, I had gone the previous year for the midnight
• 6:44
  showing and I had, again, I had more fun with Empire of Death
• 6:51
  than than a lot of people. Again, I don't mind the big dog.
• 6:55
  I don't mind a lot of the stuff that people found very egregious
• 6:58
  about it. I thought it was entertaining
• 7:00
  enough as opposed to this, which was dog shit.
• 7:03
  But the like we came out, one of the guys just looked to me and
• 7:06
  just went. Did you enjoy that?
• 7:09
  As if. As if it was a judgement.
• 7:10
  Dead. It was absolutely.
• 7:12
  You could have had a pin drop and it was full and everyone
• 7:14
  just sort of shuffled out after Empire, yeah.
• 7:17
  Yeah, yeah, no, yeah. Like, yeah, ours was.
• 7:19
  Ours was packed for Empire Death.
• 7:22
  It was not packed for. Worst New Series 9.
• 7:32
  I don't know what I don't want to put all of the RTD 2 ones in
• 7:34
  the same in the same bit. Fuck it.
• 7:38
  I hated lucky day. Oh, what madness.
• 7:43
  Madness. One of my.
• 7:45
  Favourites go on. I just, I don't, I don't think
• 7:49
  it makes any sense. I think it's very stupid, which
• 7:52
  would be fine if you were in an era where that wasn't like it
• 7:56
  didn't feel like they were trying to do something clever.
• 7:59
  It's just so dumb that she wouldn't have googled him and he
• 8:03
  wouldn't have been incredibly famous that she wouldn't have
• 8:06
  that. That he would be able to pretend
• 8:08
  this while also having millions of followers.
• 8:10
  That neither of her family would have found out who the fuck he
• 8:14
  is. That he'd have been able to get
• 8:16
  into unit tower without like without being shot.
• 8:20
  There are just too. Many projected though sort of a
• 8:25
  lie so he could get into unit and only had like a secret
• 8:29
  gatherings, you know, like think tank and things like that, you
• 8:33
  know. Yeah, but they did, they just,
• 8:36
  you know, part of the part of the critique of these sorts of
• 8:40
  movements which we're, you know, learning now are much bigger
• 8:43
  than they're all very public facing.
• 8:46
  They're nobody, nobody's ashamed.
• 8:48
  Nobody's saying these things secretly because they think
• 8:51
  that, you know, they're not ashamed of being exposed these
• 8:54
  people anymore. Like they're quite happy and out
• 8:56
  and proud to be these horrible conclusion theories.
• 9:00
  It's very sad and I hate it. And it it felt like it could
• 9:04
  have been like Conrad had the opportunity to be a character
• 9:06
  where it it really obviously the fact the end, the end of his
• 9:11
  story is similarly dissatisfying.
• 9:16
  I don't even know how I feel really about the bit where the
• 9:19
  Doctor gets fucked off from in the TARDIS.
• 9:21
  I think that's a really good performance from Shooty.
• 9:24
  I don't know that I like it because of all the people the
• 9:28
  doctor has met, there's, I don't know, there's something about
• 9:34
  the banality of evil, maybe that that Conrad is one of the worst
• 9:40
  kinds of people because he's like a sort of snaky, horrible,
• 9:43
  evil fascist. But.
• 9:44
  What? You're saying he doesn't
• 9:45
  actually deserve that sort of confrontation.
• 9:48
  Yeah, well, it's not that he doesn't, but certainly in
• 9:51
  comparison to, you know, the actual megalomaniacal genocidal
• 9:55
  maniacs that the doctors, you know.
• 9:58
  Or the racist from dot and Bubble where he just sort of
• 10:01
  walked away. Yeah, he just punched that bloke
• 10:03
  in thin ice and that was fine. Should she?
• 10:07
  Should have just punched him. It would have been really funny
• 10:09
  to materialise the TARDIS around him, punch him and then just go
• 10:11
  away that. Even I know that R2D is not
• 10:15
  stupid enough to have a black man as the dogs are going around
• 10:18
  punching. People for time and space.
• 10:21
  Just if it was a whole episode, if a whole series of shooting,
• 10:24
  going around punching racists, I would have been on board for
• 10:28
  that. Although this is the same RTD
• 10:30
  that says we don't want to give him the normal Sonic screwdriver
• 10:32
  because it looks like a gum and then gives him the biggest
• 10:35
  fucking gum the Doctor's ever added in reality.
• 10:38
  Yeah, that I feel like he says a lot of that stuff with just a
• 10:41
  twinkle in his eye and knowing that people are just going to go
• 10:43
  crazy. But yeah, I just.
• 10:46
  It's one of those things where I'm a Doctor Who fan, I can, I
• 10:51
  can put up with a lot of logical inconsistencies, but just
• 10:56
  watching Lucky Day, I was just like, I don't understand what
• 10:58
  the fuck is going on here. And not even that.
• 11:01
  No, actually, no, I did understand.
• 11:02
  And I just kept thinking, but that can't have happened.
• 11:05
  And fair enough. If you're on another planet and
• 11:07
  there's like some war going on, you can write your way around
• 11:09
  it. You go, oh, well, actually these
• 11:10
  people don't breathe oxygen. They breathe, you know, carbon
• 11:13
  monoxide and that's why they're able to get through these fires
• 11:15
  or whatever. That's not an actual example,
• 11:17
  but you can write your way around that.
• 11:19
  Whereas the idea that he'd have been able to wander into this
• 11:24
  building with supposedly high security, although it would
• 11:27
  appear that only a selection of former Doctor Who companions
• 11:32
  work there, all in the same room and never doing anything other
• 11:36
  than that. But the idea just all of that
• 11:38
  feels so hollow. Like it feels like they were
• 11:41
  trying to do something and just missing the point of why any of
• 11:47
  that stuff is scary. And just kind of it's the fact
• 11:50
  that it's insidious. It's the fact that it's it's
• 11:53
  under our, it's under our noses, but then just making him being
• 11:56
  able to like even the most, you know, Tommy Robinson or whoever
• 12:01
  couldn't walk into fucking MI 6 without getting shot.
• 12:08
  Like he couldn't. He just couldn't do that.
• 12:09
  Units being, you know, secured both of links, I don't think
• 12:13
  it's too odd to get in there. Well, no.
• 12:15
  OK, maybe that. Maybe that maybe I'm being.
• 12:16
  Stuart. Maybe I'm over, maybe I'm
• 12:18
  overestimating units powers. And Maurice Gibson, or whatever
• 12:21
  his name is, Gibbons. Yeah, Maurice, Maurice Gibb from
• 12:25
  the Bee Gees, probably. I'd have enjoyed that.
• 12:28
  Actually. I'd have liked seeing him on a
• 12:29
  little Segway just. I can't divorce my my first time
• 12:34
  experience for that one because the twist really floored me.
• 12:37
  But I think if if it's a House of Cards that never really was
• 12:40
  built for you, then yes, I absolutely.
• 12:42
  And then the twist sort of goes, well, none of that makes sense.
• 12:47
  I can understand. Yeah, well, that's the thing.
• 12:49
  The twist also floored me. Like, I was like, I was
• 12:52
  completely blown away by the fact that there'd been no hint
• 12:55
  of of any of this. It felt like it's kind of in,
• 13:01
  I'll tell you one that does it really well, it's Frozen.
• 13:04
  I don't know if you're a follower of the the Disney
• 13:05
  films. Let it.
• 13:07
  Go, let it go. Yes, yes.
• 13:09
  Yes, but but that is 1 where you don't see it coming that he's
• 13:14
  that hands is the body and that sort of works.
• 13:18
  Like it makes sense that his plan would have been this from
• 13:20
  all along. And there are a couple of bits
• 13:21
  where you think like watching his reactions to things.
• 13:24
  There's there'd have been a hint, but it kind of works.
• 13:28
  Out together, don't they? What's that song, I think?
• 13:31
  It's oh, I can't I, you know, it's crazy.
• 13:34
  We finish each other's sandwiches.
• 13:36
  That's what I was going to say. Yeah.
• 13:39
  Yeah, I thought, oh, lovely, she's found the ideal man.
• 13:41
  No, turns out he's a fascist. Yeah, exactly.
• 13:44
  And which is basically the plot of Lucky day.
• 13:47
  But, but, but lucky Day is, yeah, exactly which lucky day is
• 13:51
  bad. So that's the that's the shame.
• 13:53
  But in the in that way that like, yeah, I, I get the idea of
• 13:56
  him turning around, but the idea that he's got this massive mega
• 13:59
  following like, but then that said, I'm saying this and as I'm
• 14:04
  saying it, I'm thinking, did you watch that Louis Theroux thing
• 14:06
  with the with all those horrible pricks?
• 14:09
  And I've never heard of any of them.
• 14:10
  Either so maybe. Maybe that's the Maybe I'm.
• 14:13
  Maybe I'm misunderstanding, maybe he's been better than I
• 14:16
  thought, but I still think the idea that if you were starting
• 14:19
  to date someone, you wouldn't just Google or go on their
• 14:21
  podcast. You wouldn't just have a quick
• 14:22
  cursory look around and see what their media presence online is
• 14:26
  and go, Oh no, actually this guy's like a alt white nut case
• 14:29
  because she's not, she's not thick, is she?
• 14:31
  She's she's, she's travelled with the Doctor and she's, she's
• 14:33
  a bright, you're bright young thing.
• 14:35
  She's, she knows what she's doing.
• 14:37
  So the idea. Is stupid Pete McCoy.
• 14:39
  Yes, exactly. I realise you've taken out Jonah
• 14:42
  Howard Kings both of his performances now and your POM 10
• 14:46
  so far. And I would also like, I will
• 14:49
  say I really like the thing the the thing with the shriek
• 14:53
  costumes where they. Oh yes.
• 14:57
  I like the the little detail where they they made a ship
• 14:59
  version like that's a really fun and clever interesting thing to
• 15:04
  do. Don't you remember the gag in
• 15:05
  Power of Crawl when Ramana's screaming and then the Doctor
• 15:09
  takes her head off? I think it turns out it's a
• 15:11
  swampy. He goes.
• 15:11
  Well, it must have been more convincing from the front.
• 15:14
  It's basically that, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, exactly.
• 15:16
  But that, yeah, I, that I, I props to that bit.
• 15:19
  I like that bit. And I yeah, the twist was good.
• 15:22
  The twist flawed me. But the second you start
• 15:24
  thinking about any of it, it just goes to shit.
• 15:28
  And well, you're crazy, but I feel as if you have justified
• 15:32
  yourself adequately there. Well, that's nice.
• 15:34
  It's nice that I've been able to do that.
• 15:35
  That's maybe that's a first. That's good.
• 15:42
  Worst New Series 8. Yeah, do you know what?
• 15:45
  Fuck it. We're talking about frozen in
• 15:46
  the last one. So with this one, I'm chucking
• 15:48
  Jonathan Groff in the bin. Rogue can.
• 15:51
  Thank God, isn't he boring? Yeah, I'm not averse to the idea
• 15:57
  of the I'm not adverse to the idea of romance as much as some.
• 16:01
  I don't really like it. I don't need like River Song as
• 16:04
  a character in general. I I can't stand weirdly, mostly
• 16:08
  with with Matt Smith, who she spends the most time with.
• 16:11
  I quite like her beginning. And ending, Yeah, God, he's so
• 16:16
  young compared to her. I know that's, that's not,
• 16:19
  that's not my issue. It's that she doesn't make any
• 16:21
  sense and she's boring, but that's.
• 16:23
  There's no chemistry. Yeah, Yeah, there is that.
• 16:25
  Just like in Rogue. Just like in Rogue.
• 16:27
  Exactly like that. I think I quite enjoyed it the
• 16:29
  first time because I was really willing myself to just think
• 16:36
  it's. I like the scene in in his ship
• 16:39
  with the Kylie Minogue stuff. That's fun.
• 16:41
  Fucking hate that. Scene.
• 16:42
  Oh, really? Seek.
• 16:46
  Well, do you know what I was thinking?
• 16:47
  Actually, you should. This is my you should.
• 16:50
  I was thinking earlier about the when you're doing your.
• 16:54
  Sound. Design for this 10.
• 16:56
  Yeah, go on. Classic La La la.
• 16:59
  Yeah, I can put Kylie in. No, I'll be taken down
• 17:01
  immediately. Yeah, now I think I enjoyed that
• 17:07
  scene. I liked him being stood there
• 17:09
  and stuck and that's I like the Kylie thing.
• 17:12
  I think she must be in a very small number of people who've
• 17:14
  had a song in the show and appeared in the show.
• 17:18
  And in a photograph with the EDA camera obscurer as well.
• 17:22
  Oh, is she? Oh, there you go then.
• 17:23
  So she's she might be the most referenced pop star in all of in
• 17:26
  all of Doctor Who then. I left pop star at that you.
• 17:29
  Know exactly she's she's top we. Actually attract the best here
• 17:32
  at Doctor Who. You know.
• 17:34
  Lily Allen's and all of that. I think there's a there's
• 17:36
  probably a bit of a crossover in the fandom as well, isn't there?
• 17:41
  Yes, I think you could be right, although I'm not the biggest
• 17:44
  Kylie fan, I've got to be honest.
• 17:45
  No. She seems a good egg though,
• 17:47
  don't she? I.
• 17:47
  Think Oh absolutely yes, yes. Even if she did only have two
• 17:52
  lines, it went in that neighbour's finale.
• 17:54
  What are you avoiding? Avoiding talking about rogue
• 17:57
  because I just. Well, it's just so boring.
• 17:59
  I mean, it's not even worth our attention really.
• 18:01
  Those stupid bird people. The.
• 18:03
  Fact. I thought the bird make up was
• 18:04
  good but apart from you know. The historical, the the like,
• 18:08
  the historical is we're doing Bridgeton, you know what I mean?
• 18:11
  That's that's the premise. It's Doctor Who does Bridgeton.
• 18:14
  It's so basic, isn't it? It's so that's generating
• 18:18
  content. That's not creating writing a
• 18:20
  story. I think it would have been more
• 18:22
  entertaining if they hadn't kept saying, oh, it's just like
• 18:26
  Bridgeton. We get it.
• 18:28
  All right, we get it. I think it's, you know,
• 18:31
  signposting They're doing Bridgeton as much as Bill Potts
• 18:33
  is gay. It's Bridgeton without all the
• 18:36
  six sort of fabulous men's arses bonking up and down.
• 18:40
  To be fair, if they'd taken Jonathan Groffin shooting off to
• 18:45
  a room to just. Like, I mean, I hear beyond the
• 18:49
  scenes. Well, yeah.
• 18:52
  Maybe that's it. Well, what's the is it in
• 18:53
  friends where one of them says about it must be Joey because
• 18:57
  he's the actor and he saying about not having any chemistry
• 19:00
  with his character, his Co stars on on stage or on screen because
• 19:06
  he's actually shagging them behind the scenes.
• 19:08
  Maybe that's where the chemistry went.
• 19:09
  It's because they were never mind anyway.
• 19:12
  It's just dismal though, and as a as a lead in to the two-part
• 19:16
  finale, I mean, I hear and that I've seen evidence that seems to
• 19:22
  suggest that Rogue and the Devil's Court were initially.
• 19:28
  So the Devil's chord was just before the two-part finale and
• 19:31
  Rogue was the episode after space babies.
• 19:35
  I don't think they wanted to wear space babies and Rogue on
• 19:37
  the same place. So they.
• 19:39
  So they switched them around. No, that, yeah.
• 19:42
  That that kind of tracks. I feel like that makes sense.
• 19:44
  Well, remember. Devil's Chord ends with the
• 19:48
  Harbinger going away, and then that leads into Harriet
• 19:51
  Harbinger in Oh yes There's. Small shit.
• 19:54
  Marley, that makes sense. Yeah, that does stare the.
• 19:57
  Tracks all right, well. Let's just throw Rogue in the
• 19:59
  bin and. Never think about it again.
• 20:05
  Last new series 7 working backwards.
• 20:07
  Then I'm putting face the Raven. Face the Raven, The other Sarah
• 20:11
  Donald episode, Yeah. My God one.
• 20:14
  'S in your top, one's in your bottom, I don't think.
• 20:16
  That's conscious, because I'd never remember who's written
• 20:18
  things. Yeah, it's the.
• 20:19
  Same, right? Yeah.
• 20:21
  I think she'd take. A long time to die at the end of
• 20:24
  this. I think that's.
• 20:25
  That's sort of my issue is I was ready for Clara to go about a
• 20:29
  series ago and she didn't and it's taken fucking ages to get
• 20:34
  to this point. And again, I can't even really
• 20:37
  remember what happens in the story.
• 20:39
  I just remember being like, can we not just fucking send her
• 20:43
  away please? She sort of stands there in slow
• 20:46
  motion for about 5 minutes as that bird's coming down the trap
• 20:50
  streets to kill her and the sort of agonising strings of Murray
• 20:53
  Gold go trying to make us feel really sad.
• 20:56
  Yeah, because then. That leads into, you know, the
• 20:58
  whole hell bent in heaven sent thing where he's just he's
• 21:01
  furious. But I would imagine, surely he's
• 21:04
  going to go to the Thailand and go, oh, actually you've done me
• 21:06
  a massive fever. This is.
• 21:08
  It's been intolerable. We're all punching the air with
• 21:11
  delight. We're like, Doctor, why?
• 21:13
  Why are you mourning her for a million, billion years?
• 21:15
  She keeps thinking. She's me and it's really fucking
• 21:18
  irritating. You must have been.
• 21:20
  Really sad in Hell Bent then when she popped up again.
• 21:24
  I don't mind a cameo, but yeah, I'm just, I, I don't, yeah, I'm
• 21:27
  not a fan of the whole, you know, kill people and leave them
• 21:31
  dead. And like, you know, I, I've got,
• 21:34
  I go through phases of being a comics guy.
• 21:36
  I'm not a huge, I don't read much of them these days.
• 21:41
  But it's a real common trope in superhero comics, especially
• 21:44
  when they'll kill off a character and it'll be a major
• 21:46
  thing. I think out of all the
• 21:47
  characters that have died in these things, there's only like
• 21:49
  one or two that have stayed dead and it's exhausting.
• 21:53
  Just fucking kill people. That's right.
• 21:56
  Now look. I don't really like the fact
• 21:58
  that Chris Chibnall killed off poor Grace at the start of the
• 22:01
  Chibnall era because I really like Grace.
• 22:04
  But I was really pleased that someone died and stayed dead,
• 22:06
  that there were emotional consequences to it.
• 22:09
  Yeah, it it. Means something you you can't
• 22:12
  have your cake and eat it you have to we're so.
• 22:15
  Sad that she's dead, right? And that she's flying around in
• 22:17
  a diner with a lesbian, isn't it?
• 22:19
  Yeah. I thought so That sounds like
• 22:22
  quite a nice time that she's having.
• 22:23
  And maybe that's what we should tell sort of children instead of
• 22:28
  the the usual sort of sort of afterlife myths, we should say,
• 22:33
  oh, well, what happens is you get to go on adventures with of
• 22:37
  Game of Thrones. Yeah.
• 22:38
  Oh, wasn't she boring? Macy Williams?
• 22:40
  Good grief, no. Yeah, no, I, I quite, I like to
• 22:43
  think she was probably one of the most interesting characters
• 22:45
  in Game of Thrones. And then she was, oh, in Game of
• 22:47
  Thrones. Yeah, but not in Doctor.
• 22:48
  Yeah. Yeah.
• 22:48
  No, she was. Not very much in this.
• 22:50
  And again, there were, there are other ones where I, they were
• 22:52
  tempted, I was tempted to put them on the list because because
• 22:55
  I remember nothing about them. Most of the stuff with Maisie
• 22:58
  Williams. But then I just I just see that.
• 22:59
  Ghastly shot at the end of The Girl Who died where she's matted
• 23:04
  in against the special effects where time is moving really fast
• 23:08
  and. You can just.
• 23:09
  See how badly she's CSO D in there?
• 23:12
  Yeah. Bless.
• 23:13
  Her. OK, face the Raven, right?
• 23:15
  Yeah. Yeah, I got nothing else.
• 23:18
  It's bad. I don't like it.
• 23:23
  Worst news Series 6 Deep breath. What a strange choice, I What a
• 23:30
  strange choice to open an era there, Yeah.
• 23:34
  This is one of the few times that it was in the cinema that I
• 23:36
  didn't go and I don't know why, because I was excited for
• 23:38
  Capaldi and I think maybe just my fandom wasn't particularly up
• 23:42
  at the time. But I just, it's just such a
• 23:46
  prick, but not in a fun way. And he's so like, it's in the
• 23:53
  way that in the same way that chucking loads of ideas at the
• 23:56
  Doctor, the Doctor Who should work really well.
• 23:59
  See Power of the Doctor, There's there's a dinosaur in this in
• 24:03
  Victorian London and it's really boring.
• 24:06
  And I don't understand how that happens.
• 24:09
  That's so. Mafia just shoving in two
• 24:11
  disparate elements and hoping it entertains.
• 24:14
  Not least to say. That the dinosaurs
• 24:16
  proportionally completely out of whack.
• 24:19
  They could not have swallowed the TARDIS.
• 24:20
  And I'm absolutely, you know, I'm, I'm sorry to be that guy,
• 24:24
  but that's, that's, that's too stupid, isn't.
• 24:28
  It bizarre to start a doctor's era by having him sort of up
• 24:32
  there on the wall, sort of bellowing at a dinosaur in the
• 24:36
  distance. What is going on here?
• 24:38
  Like yeah, no idea. I like the bit about attack
• 24:41
  eyebrows. That's good.
• 24:42
  That's a good line. When Clara.
• 24:44
  Gets hit with a newspaper that's.
• 24:47
  Also very funny. See, I'm, yeah, I'm a
• 24:49
  Paternoster fan. I like those guys.
• 24:53
  The bits I've heard of theirs on audio, I've enjoyed.
• 24:56
  I've not heard loads of it. Excuse me, but I, but I, I do
• 25:02
  like them as a, as a team and I, I kind of like the bit where
• 25:08
  Clara and Madame Vastra are having the conversation about,
• 25:11
  you know, this is, this is what he's like, this is what you have
• 25:13
  to do. I just, I just don't find, I
• 25:18
  don't know, I feel like maybe he feels like a bit of a let down,
• 25:20
  especially because it's over an hour and a half.
• 25:21
  So it's not like by the end of it.
• 25:23
  Yeah. And I didn't.
• 25:25
  I didn't need the Matt Smith phone call.
• 25:26
  I don't know what that's about. It is.
• 25:29
  It's at the. End and it does feel I mean, you
• 25:32
  know, it's divisive. Some people say it's passing the
• 25:34
  torch, others say they didn't trust the audience to fault for
• 25:39
  Peter Capaldi. So Matt Smith saying fault for
• 25:41
  Peter. But when you've had him for an
• 25:44
  hour and a bit behaving like a cunt, it's really hard to.
• 25:49
  To get that it is because. It's such a.
• 25:53
  It's just such a weird. I'm trying to think what the an
• 25:57
  example popped into my head there and it's gone.
• 25:59
  I'll try and remember it later, but it there's just no need
• 26:02
  that. We've never had that before.
• 26:04
  And I know that there's lots of things.
• 26:05
  I know regeneration is different every time, but actually
• 26:07
  actively bringing back the previous actor to kind of just
• 26:13
  to just kind of staple on like, look, it's the same show and
• 26:16
  look, it's still it's going to be fine.
• 26:18
  That kind of does. Happen in Power of the Doctor.
• 26:22
  Well. You could keep.
• 26:25
  Watching Guys, David Tennant's back.
• 26:28
  Yeah, yeah. That didn't.
• 26:29
  Well, to be fair though I suppose they did it with Jodie
• 26:31
  again in. Yeah, well, in that one.
• 26:35
  It was the best bit though, because types.
• 26:37
  Have changed in a couple of years, yeah.
• 26:40
  Maybe. Yeah, maybe that's the thing.
• 26:41
  Didn't bring, at least they didn't bring tenant back again.
• 26:44
  OK, deep. Breath, right?
• 26:45
  I like this. And we're sort of getting tops
• 26:48
  and bottoms in the same era. So I'm getting sort of the idea
• 26:51
  of your taste within an era as well.
• 26:56
  Worst new series 5 the last. 20 minutes of the time of the
• 27:00
  doctor I know. Oh.
• 27:03
  Thank God. Oh, this list is getting making
• 27:06
  more sense as you go along. Yeah, maybe it does work.
• 27:09
  Maybe it does work if you just go backwards.
• 27:10
  But yeah, time with the doctor is, I think I watched it again
• 27:13
  fairly recently and thought, I don't really know why everyone's
• 27:17
  complaining about this. It's just, it's, it's all right.
• 27:20
  It's, it's not like groundbreaking, but it's, it's
• 27:22
  good fun. And then it the last 20 minutes
• 27:24
  or so is just intolerable, isn't it?
• 27:26
  It's terrible. What is going on?
• 27:28
  When he's on that tower, well, that fucking latex dribbling off
• 27:32
  his face, shooting out beams of regeneration, destroying
• 27:37
  Darling. I know that regeneration.
• 27:40
  'S it's never consistent, is it? But it is a really bad ending to
• 27:47
  anything. And it goes on it it sort of
• 27:49
  makes that same mistake. I think that the end of time
• 27:52
  makes foreshadowing that it does that it doesn't.
• 27:56
  It's not quite as egregious a victory lap, but it still does.
• 27:59
  That whole bringing back a companion, letting him off his
• 28:01
  hair back, couldn't make him young again.
• 28:04
  Just let the man die. And then it is the quickest
• 28:06
  death that we've ever had. Like it's the quickest death
• 28:09
  sneezes. Yeah, he just sneezes.
• 28:12
  Him out and then he's there. But if we just could have done
• 28:14
  that 20 minutes ago, we could have all gone to bed.
• 28:19
  I'm not going to. Disagree with time with the
• 28:21
  doctor. I mean it's.
• 28:22
  The. Opposite of what you said about
• 28:23
  power of the doctor, this is 1, which also has many, many
• 28:26
  ingredients in it, but it's just a mess, Yeah.
• 28:30
  That's the thing. It's and maybe you can't tell
• 28:32
  when you're making it. I'm sure you can't.
• 28:34
  But like, you know, if you ever worked on something for that,
• 28:38
  that takes forever and you're just sick of watching it and
• 28:41
  you're you're sat in the editing suite and you can't tell that
• 28:44
  what you've got is a complete Turkey.
• 28:47
  I think the big. Difference between the two is
• 28:50
  that Power of the Doctor has Jamie Magner Stone, and I think
• 28:52
  he's genuinely one of the best directors we've ever had.
• 28:54
  Like he, I mean, how the fuck do you assemble that thing?
• 28:57
  And he does it, you know? He does it.
• 29:01
  It's it's, it's an impressive bit of work.
• 29:06
  Worst New series 4 Bells of St. John.
• 29:10
  Oh, I just mentioned it earlier. I did.
• 29:13
  I raised an eyebrow. I raised an eyebrow.
• 29:16
  I. Always nothing, isn't it?
• 29:18
  It's very. I think like I know I I love the
• 29:23
  Ponds, I love their relationship.
• 29:26
  I know that it's not everyone's cup of tea, but I think I
• 29:30
  prefer. Coffee, Yeah.
• 29:32
  That's that's fair enough. But do you prefer Clara?
• 29:36
  No. That's why drinking a cup of
• 29:39
  cold sick, yeah. That's the thing, right?
• 29:42
  I think I, I think they had, they had lovely chemistry
• 29:46
  between the three of them. And Jenna Coleman comes in and I
• 29:50
  just immediately don't care for her.
• 29:53
  And I know that it's the same every time they replace, you
• 29:55
  know, whenever they cast somebody new, you're always a
• 29:57
  little bit like, oh, am I going to like them?
• 29:59
  Am I not? And I just, I assumed that I'd
• 30:01
  eventually kind of get used to her, but I think I just found
• 30:04
  her irritating from the start. I just, I don't care for the,
• 30:07
  the character. I don't care for the story.
• 30:08
  I can't remember what the story is.
• 30:10
  He drives a motorbike up the Shard, does he I think.
• 30:13
  There's one great bit sort of where they go from, is it like
• 30:18
  into the TARDIS and then they're in a plane that's crashing.
• 30:20
  That's quite, which is quite, quite, quite well done.
• 30:23
  It's all done in sort of one take, isn't it?
• 30:25
  Or it appears to be sort of very Hitchcockian.
• 30:27
  But apart from that, I just can't remember a fucking silly
• 30:30
  rim reason that I don't remember anything she does.
• 30:33
  Yeah, yeah. Is the, is the.
• 30:35
  Wi-Fi joke in this one, Or is that a different story?
• 30:37
  Which one's the Wi-Fi joke? The Wi-Fi.
• 30:38
  Joke. It's a Chibnall joke, isn't it?
• 30:39
  That dread with. The kids, yeah.
• 30:43
  Very funny. But.
• 30:45
  Yeah, I just, I just have no, I've no interest in it as a
• 30:48
  story, so. Boring.
• 30:50
  I don't think we should even think about it anymore.
• 30:56
  Last new series three shit what is like?
• 31:00
  Skill Hitler. Oh Christ, it's oh God.
• 31:07
  I'm making. Blasphemous statements because
• 31:10
  it's so bad. It's I.
• 31:12
  Do you know what I I was young enough when this came out.
• 31:15
  When's this when? 2011 ish?
• 31:19
  I was 20/21/22 and I did think that the idea of having a story
• 31:26
  called Let's Kill Hitler was funny.
• 31:28
  I don't know, looking back I'm like, that's really fucking
• 31:33
  stupid and doesn't really make an awful lot of sense.
• 31:36
  Plus there's that some of the dialogue is very telling, isn't
• 31:40
  it? The the bit with I mean River is
• 31:42
  unbearable already and I it's weird actually that I'm only
• 31:46
  realising now that she doesn't actually appear in this list
• 31:48
  apart from this. But this is her worst by a
• 31:53
  country mile. I think it's all.
• 31:55
  The the law, and like all the mystery that there ever was from
• 31:58
  silence in the library, is just gone.
• 32:01
  Because we've got everything here and it's so boring and so
• 32:05
  tedious. I had someone.
• 32:06
  Recently, Joe, say the best line in Doctor Who, it was a young
• 32:11
  person, though. It was the gay, Jewish bar
• 32:14
  mitzvah line. I hate that line.
• 32:17
  It's trying so hard to be edgy and hip and just.
• 32:22
  It's an old man writing that line and it just misses the mark
• 32:25
  by a mile. Yeah, again, that's one of
• 32:27
  those. Ones I probably would have
• 32:28
  thought was funny at the time. And now I sort of think that we
• 32:32
  were talking, my wife and I were talking the other day that we, I
• 32:34
  feel like we thought that racism was done.
• 32:38
  Like probably very easy for me to say that, but racism was done
• 32:43
  like in this period of history. We were like, oh wait.
• 32:46
  Well. I think in that it was in that
• 32:49
  same period, I'm not a Little Britain fan by any stretch of
• 32:51
  the imagination. I think it's woeful.
• 32:53
  But like, we were in that period where people were doing ironic
• 32:56
  racism and like a line like this, because even though it's
• 32:59
  sort of poking fun at that, it feels like the sort of thing you
• 33:03
  can get away with saying in 2011 that you can't, that wouldn't be
• 33:07
  OK to say now. You'd be much more funny joke.
• 33:11
  No, it's not funny. Joke.
• 33:12
  Either it's like having the fat 1 and the thin one that the gay
• 33:15
  characters with no names in. It's trying so hard to be hip.
• 33:20
  Yeah. And just missing which I
• 33:23
  suppose. Could sum up.
• 33:24
  Let's go, Hitler, you know, Yeah.
• 33:26
  Again, I don't mind that Arthur Darville punches Hitler in the
• 33:30
  face. I'm I'm OK with that.
• 33:32
  I feel like as as with Nicholas Banks in Thin Ice, I don't mind
• 33:37
  Hitler getting punched. But I.
• 33:39
  Just think, making Hitler a figure of fun.
• 33:41
  He was such a monster, right? Making him a figure of fun that
• 33:44
  people enjoy watching. See, I don't.
• 33:48
  Know see, with that, I don't know that I agree entirely
• 33:51
  because there's plenty of things like even at the time Charlie
• 33:53
  Chaplin was making the Great Dictator.
• 33:55
  I think it's just how it's handled.
• 33:57
  I think to be a throwaway bit because his name's in the title
• 34:00
  so it's not like it's that. The joke is obviously supposed
• 34:03
  to be there, but I don't think he plays enough of a part in the
• 34:05
  story really to be to justify. The title to justify.
• 34:10
  The that's supposed to. Be a joke as well.
• 34:12
  Well, it's essentially. Clickbait, isn't it?
• 34:14
  It's meant to be like a hilarious like oh ha.
• 34:17
  Bloody ha yeah. So you, I think you can do it.
• 34:23
  I just don't think here, you know, all the producers with,
• 34:26
  you know, springtime for Hitler. And there are ways of making
• 34:30
  Hitler sort of funny, but doing it in an episode of Doctor Who
• 34:36
  when there's only 45 minutes to do it is probably not the way.
• 34:40
  Have you ever worked? With that person, there's just a
• 34:44
  smug arsehole all the time about everything and has like hideous
• 34:49
  what they think is witty quips, you know, and they think they're
• 34:53
  so clever that's let's kill Hitler.
• 34:56
  It's the smug arsehole that you work with that's.
• 34:59
  A good description. Yeah, I think you are right
• 35:01
  about that. The piece of piss and the smug
• 35:04
  arsehole we're forget the metaphors it sounds.
• 35:07
  Like it sounds like. One of those American TV shows
• 35:10
  We should have sound effects you're listening to.
• 35:13
  I can't. Do that you know you're?
• 35:15
  Listening to the piece of piss and the smug asshole.
• 35:21
  Worst New Series 2. Shakespeare Code 0.
• 35:26
  OK, OK. Is that because it was written
• 35:30
  by Gareth Robus? It's not.
• 35:32
  No, I did. I, I don't mind.
• 35:35
  Like I like Unicorn and the Wasp.
• 35:37
  I don't mind some of his writing.
• 35:38
  I think it's fine. But yeah, it's not the reason
• 35:40
  that it's on here. Some other ones that didn't make
• 35:42
  a huge impression, to be honest. It's I.
• 35:45
  Just think it's really. Boring.
• 35:46
  I don't. I don't like the sort of lechy
• 35:48
  Shakespeare thing. I don't really care for the
• 35:53
  favour of what they call the witches.
• 35:56
  Oh, the carrier. Nights the carrier.
• 35:57
  Nights yeah, because they clearly did them again on Big
• 35:59
  Finished in there and I thought they were shit on that as well
• 36:02
  wow it's. All very basic, isn't it?
• 36:04
  Shakespeare. Witches, you know.
• 36:07
  Yeah, it feels like one of those ones where there's not, again,
• 36:11
  I'm. I'm noticing a lot of parallels
• 36:13
  between a lot of these where they'll have said to someone do
• 36:16
  they said to Gareth Roberts, do Shakespeare with witches and it
• 36:19
  sort of should write itself like dinosaurs on a spaceship.
• 36:22
  But they it just, it's just doesn't work.
• 36:24
  And I think that the, well, it's not.
• 36:26
  It's not. Punching is it.
• 36:27
  It ain't punching That's so basic.
• 36:29
  And they it's lavish. Like they spent a shit ton of
• 36:33
  money on it. I think it looks beautiful.
• 36:35
  It looks thus. I'd rather have like a cheap
• 36:38
  experiment than an expensive, you know, ball fest.
• 36:43
  Yeah. We are here for bubble wrap.
• 36:45
  Really that's what we want. That's what we want.
• 36:47
  Bubble wrap and paper, but bubble wrap.
• 36:49
  When sort of people are being eaten from the inside out by
• 36:51
  grubs. Yeah, that's.
• 36:53
  What I want, I want, I want sort of reverse packaging.
• 36:57
  I don't really know what I'm trying to say there, but yeah,
• 37:00
  there are a. Few troubling sort of racist
• 37:02
  lines in there as well. Yeah, I don't.
• 37:04
  That's that I don't love. I think as well to be so blase
• 37:07
  to we've finally got a black companion and we're just being
• 37:11
  so flippant about it. But this is kind of, you know,
• 37:14
  like I say, we were kind of in that that era where it felt like
• 37:18
  that sort of stuff was kind of like, oh, it's gone away now.
• 37:22
  It was so. Refreshing, wasn't it, when we
• 37:23
  got Yas and we had like a person of colour as a companion that
• 37:27
  wasn't receiving lots of, lots of racism like Mason, Martha
• 37:32
  wasn't having holes blown in their chest like Bill, but was
• 37:35
  just allowed to be a capable, confident woman.
• 37:39
  Yeah. It's nice we got there
• 37:41
  eventually. We did we.
• 37:42
  Did yes. Well, I mean, I think I do know
• 37:45
  people that like the Shakespeare code, but I also know people
• 37:48
  that think that it is as sort of nothing as Doctor Who could
• 37:54
  possibly be, as cardboard as it could possibly be.
• 38:00
  Worst New Series 1 the. End of time is I can.
• 38:07
  Understand it, I do like it but I can unders.
• 38:10
  Absolutely understand this might be to be.
• 38:12
  Honest. It might just be Part 2.
• 38:13
  To be honest, that's a bit I. Love.
• 38:16
  Yeah. Oh.
• 38:16
  Well, that's, that's also fine. There's some really beautiful
• 38:19
  things in there. I think Bernard Cribbins is
• 38:20
  amazing. I I like the stuff with the
• 38:22
  Master. I just, I just find it all a
• 38:24
  little bit weepy and self indulgent.
• 38:26
  It's the same with the same as with time with the Doctor,
• 38:29
  really. I suppose that actually I don't
• 38:31
  mind the whole story. It's the last 20 minutes or so
• 38:34
  just fucking goes on and just let the man die already.
• 38:39
  Like I'm I'm just reading. They really don't want to let.
• 38:41
  Those new series doctors go do they?
• 38:43
  No, they really. Don't.
• 38:45
  And did you? Get a long sort of.
• 38:47
  You get about 10 minutes with Jodie or once the regenerations
• 38:51
  kicked in. But it's just lovely, sweet
• 38:53
  scenes of one person. Yeah, exactly.
• 38:55
  She's. Not got 1000 people to go back
• 38:56
  and see and also I I I didn't want her to go but let's be fair
• 39:00
  by the by the end of tenant, I think I was ready by the end of
• 39:02
  the especially what it. Was by that point, I mean, I was
• 39:04
  ready for Matt Smith to go after the impossible astronaut.
• 39:07
  So it was a long wait for me, I think that was, do you think?
• 39:10
  Though, because with a lot of the the doctors, like the
• 39:13
  doctors that I would never go to, like I feel like by the time
• 39:19
  Tom regenerated when I on my on my watch through, I was ready
• 39:24
  for him to go like I was, I was tired of Tom.
• 39:29
  And I think in the same way with Tennant, I felt like he'd done
• 39:32
  everything he was going to do. You know, we're never going to
• 39:33
  get better than Tennant and take.
• 39:36
  So it was kind of it was time. And then he had those sort of
• 39:38
  like little offshoot episodes, which I think, you know, what
• 39:40
  was Martin's great. But largely speaking, they can.
• 39:43
  They're just sort of fine. They're treading water.
• 39:46
  And then I like John Simms Master.
• 39:49
  I think the end of time is just it's too much.